Overcoming Daddy Issues: Steps for Healing and Growth 

I have followed you through the years . I as a father am very proud of you!!!

Always a joy to hear from you. You are spot on with the Daddy issues. Glad you are in a better place now. I really admire you , Richie. I have known you were a great individual since the first time I saw your videos ! I am proud to know you !

DEAR RICHIE! Thank you for bringing up a very important topic! Think of so many kids who are just waiting for the ether to hear and get confirmation that you are loved under all conditions. Many fathers themselves have probably grown up without being reassured that they are valuable and not getting any praise for things that you have done well. I think that by not getting enough attention, they themselves make it difficult to show this to their own children. Richie you should have a lot of credit for having done so well in life despite not being appreciated with praise when you did something well or a warm hug growing up. I think your dad would like to tell you that he loves you, but he can't get the words out or the action. It is so sad and sad for you both. But maybe he suffers the most in silence........ So that's why Richie, I'm so happy that you can show emotions and praise others you like a lot ! Ending my lines here, but I love your videos and always look forward to them! BIG HUG from me!!!!!🤩😍💗💖💋

Hi Richie; I have really missed you and your videos. They are always so educational and inspiring. I definitely hope you continue. Your topic is spot on target and I thank you for your candor in addressing “daddy issues”! You are special and the best . Love you, Man ❤

I am a retired United Methodist pastor/psychotherapist. I have followed you for a good while and have seen you always committed to your personal growth. I really admire you and would have loved to have had you available as a mentor to some of the younger gays in my practice. Thank you.

A bitter-sweet video. You have said, in the past, that your family occasionally sees your videos. To Richies dad: be proud of your son, this articulate, self-aware man. Learn from him. Take it from me, a wise old woman!

Hey, it's good to see you, I'm a minister up in Canada. You are worthy and are enough. I'm sorry about your dad, I'm proud of you.

So well said, Richie. I am proud of you. I can,as so many others,understand what you have offered here. My Dd treated me as though I was not a real person;only time I felt anything good from him was when i spent time around him-even though he did not react much....an occasional word from him was sufficient then. He died at 48yrs. I still miss him,still wish he had loved me. BUT, I have also become who I am without him. Thank you for sharing your story.

Your story is so heart wretching. I’m glad you have survived. Thrive!!

These comments are too sweet. Real life is more complicated. It is never the case that one party is to blame. Never apologize for telling your truth. You are a brave young man to have survived. Best wishes always. Dude you get to be emotional, if I where you I would be emotional to. I've watched a lot stories on RU-vid I am so disgusted by your experience. Nobody deserves to be treated the way you were. I'm sorry. I'You've been through some terrible experiences and I am so thrilled that you fought your way through it all and have become such an incredible person. Stay strong and I wish you nothing but the best in life. I am so glad that you are better now Moral of the story, don't have children.

Father Wound! What a perfect term for it! I would point out that Mother Wounds are also a reality. They can both afflict men and women as well. Gay or straight. Very exhausting to deal with it all. Thank you for the video! Have a lovely week Richie. Thank you for your input.

Hey Richie your a beautiful person and have and awesome personality and strength to pursue your life endeavors. And your right as though you feel your have problems you have to look past those and continue on as the real person who has problems is not you but your dad or other people. It's always good to be who you are and there is nothing wrong with that. How boring would the world be if everyone was the same. Most people who complain about other people have their own issues that they are afraid to try to overcome or admit, and therefore try to take it out on other people. You must adapt and overcome as life is a continuous learning process with many good adventures. I admire your for your honesty and sincerity. Good things come to good people in time.

You need to do what you feel is right for you. People should respect you. Much respect and love.❤

Well Done for what you achieve !!!! and may there be many more to come.😍🥰

Absolutely one of the best videos I've ever seen, filled with the best advice. Honestly that's what attracted me to your RU-vid videos to begin with. It seems like you're speaking directly to me. If I were your father I would be proud of you. You've accomplished so much for such young years, very wise. I'm Proud of You, Richie, and sending you hugs and much love. Your on the right path.❤

Wow! This is a great vlog. Thank you for sharing your feelings and talking about our "daddy issues". I didn't have any big revelation however I refocused my attentions on myself and not seeking for affirmations from a "father figure".

Glad to see a new YT vlog from you. When i read the title i think i took 'Daddy Issues' in a different context. Lol I am sorry for the treatment (for lack of a better term) you get from your dad. I remember you went to his wedding last year in a beautiful outdoor setting. I never had an adult relation with my father bc he died in a trucking accident 10 days before my 10th birthday. My mom never remarried,but was in 2 long term relationships. I cannot say anything about your fam bc all we know is what you say on your yt vlogs. I have F'd up a lot in my journey through life. Mom always tells me how proud she is for my accomplishments and how happy i am living my life the way i am. I think my dad would support me in the same way. LIVE THE LIFE YOU LOVE!.... YOUR WAY!

Keep strong your not worthless by any means love your vlogs and God loves you 💖

Hi from Paris (France). You said things I already knew... But I needed to hear them again. The thing is also not to expect perfection at every corner, but constant improvement at every step. Become a pilot. Maybe start by cabin crew! 😌

Sorry that a lot of you have experienced this. My father was on his own journey after having 4 boys and never getting to enjoy his youth. I wanted my dad's attention as the youngest after my parents divorced at 9 years old. However he was supportive as he could be considering his issues. I never held this against him nor did it make me seek attention from older men. My dad died 3 weeks ago at 86 and he has lived a mile away for the last 8 years. I spent time with him everyday and had a wonderful relationship. He always respected me as a gay man and I know that he has held me in higher regard than my brothers. I stayed with him 24/7 to take care of him the last month of his life. Point is sometimes we must have the grace to understand our fathers. Don't hold animosity so one can navigate the relationship to get that fatherly love. Through understanding my dad I was able to heal my feelings that were not meet in my childhood. Richie, your point at the end (17:16 mark) about taking charge and control of your life is truly where younger gay men can find the peace and heal. I am happy to hear you have found that emotional strength and growth. I truly hope your video helps many other younger gay men. Thank You!

Richie I am thrilled to see you back. I have been very concerned about you. So glad you are feeling better about yourself I respect and love you. I am sorry about your problems. Thrilled you are doing much better. You Richie are a very sweet and handsome man. If you ever feel your not loved remember I LOVE you as a person. I pray for you everyday and I can see God starting to answer prays I have prayed for you. I am PROUD of you and all of the people who watch you are proud of YOU. Take Care! Welcome Back to the net. You are a real MAN.

You're such a beautiful person. Inside and out. Much respect for you and everything you believe in. Love 💞 you lots.

Yay, my first video credit/acknowledgement. Thanks, Richie.

Kudos to you. When I was 18 I could no sooner have gone out on my own and support myself than fly to the moon. You've done a great job and I wish you continued success.

Nice video. Good to hear from you again.

I know this was an incredibly difficult video to make. Well done Ritchie. You are committed to honesty.

Well said. In general, most people have trauma in their past of some kind they need to face. Other than that, you said it all. The key is taking ownership and making a positive change in your life.

Daddy Issues are so incredibly common, across all aspects of society. The question of nature vs. nature suggests that boys without a strong paternal influence can be pushed one way or another. The same can be said for girls without a maternal influence may face similar issues.

hey scruffy face (love it), thanks for the amazing video, its hard to think that this is the normal these days, or way back when, but it's there and seems to be how life goes when the interactions between son and father within the gay community has so much of a trial to grow and learn. best to do what you need to be happy, and be around those that give you the best friendship and confidence to be YOU and not what others want you to be. Thanks again, i appreciate you and your time to post very valid info of you and the life many of us have. know you have someone that understand the complexities just the same. have to throw in an edit... KEEP those smiles, they are good on you! :)

You’re videos are so eye opening and really holds a message that you can actually use in your life, i’ve been struggling a lot with “older men” but you helped me realise their intentions and the reality of them ,i’m still 16 hopefully something will work for me

Dear Richie, I'm so glad you posted a new video on youtube! Firstly because it gives me (and all your other fans) some news about you (and I'm glad you're okay, I'm glad you had the sensitivity and intelligence to reflect on this “Daddy's issue”), but also because it gives me the opportunity to write you this long message, in the hope that maybe you'll read it. First of all, I apologize if I'm not expressing myself as well as I'd like. I'm an “old” Frenchman of 54, and it's not easy for me to write in English. I only discovered your youtube channel about six weeks ago, I think. Since then, I've watched a great many videos, in a rather random order, which was amazing because I've seen you evolve in age in all directions, moving from one experience to another, abandoning certain paths and exploring new ones. The subjects you tackle are often fascinating, treated with great relevance, courage, kindness, generosity, humor and gentleness. I have literally adored several of your videos, and all of them have given me something interesting. There are several things I'd like to thank you for specifically. This may make you laugh, but I'd like you to know that, for me, you're first and foremost the source of a small miracle! Indeed, I realized some time ago while watching one of your videos that I had followed it without any problem, understanding everything, even though I hadn't activated any subtitles, which is usually essential for me to be sure I don't miss anything, which is always a concern for me when watching a movie or RU-vid in English. Not only was I able to follow your video without any problem, but it was even the third or fourth one I had watched in a row, and none of them had given me the slightest difficulty. In short, for the first time in my life, I was "bilingual", thank you Richie! Thank you because I believe it's thanks to your voice and your beautiful way of expressing yourself that this little miracle happened. And it's not the only thing I like about you, there's also your smile; your adorable little muffled laugh when you just go "ha ha"; your hairstyle; your talent for creating simple, aesthetic, touching, and endearing atmospheres, etc. And above all, what's overwhelming and wonderful is the way you've evolved in life, the steps you've taken, the challenges you've faced, and the courageous, sincere, original, and persevering manner you've always had in never giving up and instead seeking to move forward, progress, and bounce back. You have an insightful but also completely benevolent view of the world, of others, of yourself, and you know very well how to put things in perspective and draw good lessons even from the hardest difficulties that we all inevitably end up encountering sooner or later. I'm 54 years old, probably not too far from your father's age, but I confess that I've learned interesting, useful, and joyful things from you, thanks to you. I admire your journey, your willpower, but also the mixture of strength and gentleness that you exude. And, I'm also a big fan of Lucky, your dog :-). Sorry for being so long-winded, for taking up so much space! I would have liked to say even more, maybe even exchange a few words by email with you, but when you have as many fans as you do, I understand that it's difficult to devote time to anyone in particular, especially when you already give so much of your time through your videos, and I thank you for that. My best thoughts are with you, Richie. I wish you a beautiful and long life, rich and fulfilling.

I am a photographer/videographer that works with gay models. So many models are hurting for various reasons. I often get told I have dad vibes or get called daddy because I offer a safe place for these boys. Regardless who you search out for relationships, regardless of age, I hope you find guys that are feeding your soul. Filling you with love and not just using you.

Very inspirational video Richie ... I definitely recognised some of the points you mentioned from the experience I had growing up as well. Although, the issues I have with mine stem to the fact that he was a dead beat, absentee father that we hardly ever saw so I was mostly raised by my step-mother whose son was a year older than myself, so I was perceived as a threat because whatever he had done one year I would be undertaking the very next year. I also had my younger biological brother who was doted on as he was the youngest in the household. This all caused me to hate my life and the old man who was never really there for me or the other 2.

I feel your emotion and understand your pain. I've been a father to four boys who have grown into loving caring men. I'd be pleased to be a father figure to you. I'm an older guy and live in Florida. I believe I could be a good Father type resource for you even though we are a distance apart. Please feel free to contact me if you wish, anytime day or night, 24/7. Keep your head up Rich, you're a good man.. 😊

What a catharsis for you Richie!!! Great video!!! You cant feel "purple" or "Stupid" because someone else says so.. You are absolutely on the mark!!

Thank you Ritchie. Well explained and understood. Take care❤❤❤❤

Breakthroughs are few and far between but when they happen, it's the best. Thanks for sharing yours and there seems to be a missing word in English, because when I think about saying I'm proud of you it seems off because I'm just a random person in your audience with no real standing to say that. Maybe I can put it this way: I admire you. You have tackled life's challenges and brought joy to many. Those are significant accomplishments.

Glad to see you're back! Was getting kinda concerned that we hadn't seen a video from you in some time. This was a very well thought out video. Hope your next video won't be too long in being posted!

Well said, and you’re wise beyond your years. I was very fortunate to have an incredible father growing up. I know it’s few and far between for the LGBT community, and I’’ll always be grateful for my own situation. My friends were not as lucky, and I hope a few of them will watch this video. My father passed away close to 20 years ago but he is never far from my heart. Wishing you the best.

No matter what your father did/did not do, somehow he fell short somewhere to some degree. As your father had to forgive his son several times, Adult sons need to forgive their father for the father's own shortcomings..... Both have to move foward.

Hello Richie! I just came across your videos and my German soul only needed to use Google Translate three times per video on average😅 because you speak such clear English! 🤠 I'm already of "daddy age"😎 and have long since left all the family dramas👿💀☠ behind me. Unfortunately, people like you are missing in the German-speaking world for our young gays! Don't you want to learn German and conquer the German-speaking world?🧐🤓 You're such a natural guy and would get so many clicks and subscriptions that you could afford a house in the New York Hemdens🏘 after two years at the latest. Best wishes from Cologne in Germany from Bernd🥰

My dad was emotionally AWOL. Never once lifted a finger to validate ANY feeling I had, right or wrong. Had countless opportunities to teach me; squandered them all. "Stack this wood". Now dig this hole. Now go cut the grass. When I asked him how to use this or that tool, I was told "Dont touch it dammit", usually before knocking me across the yard. Teaching me team sports? HA---no time for that foolishness, theres grass to cut and wood to stack. I was nothing but a labor facilitator. Surprise surprise, Im now an adult, vague as how to use a hammer, and gay. A father does not have to drink, womanize, run off or be a deadbeat to be abusive. Im now 60, him 85. I go thru the motions, playing the role of a good son, but its an act. Ive healed because I learned to accept an apology that aint never coming.

I can admit I have Daddies issues because my father was barely there for me when I was growing up and he made it clearly he didn't want anything to do with me before I was even born when he told my mum why don't she get rid of it I was about 12 or 13 when I found that out that really hurt me deeply to hear that about my father I didn't really saw him that much when I was kid and teenager he didn't bothered to make effort to get to know me I have few good memories with him but that was only when we wanted to bothered with me and when I came out to him he didn't support me in anyway he just told that all gay men cares about sex and after that I realise he clearly doesn't love me as his son since that day I barely talked to him now the only bond I have with my father when he message me saying happy birthday to me or merry Christmas or happy new year that the only connection I have with my dad and since the pandmic happened I feel lost and distance from my father I'm 35 years old I have notice that I have been attracted to older men when I meet a Daddy on grinder It makes sense when I'm looking for Caring father figure because how my own father wasn't there in my life

OMG. You have described my life in such detail.

WOW! What raw courage this took! What amazing transparency! You were incredibly articulate. The words flowed in one of the clearest messages I have EVER heard you give and it was clearly from the heart. For what it’s worth, I have never been so proud of you. Richie, you were insane you ARE a fine, fine young man. What a privilege to know you!!!!

Richie, You have spoken well and true about your struggles with family and identity. It reminded me of a favorite quote from an author I admire, Paul Coelho. “Maybe the journey thru life isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about unbecoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who you were meant to be.” Your own experience demonstrated that we can suffer for support in life from those we love. Such support should be about reciprocity: understanding their expectations of us, and feeling that we have been accepted for being ourselves. My own experience was to identify a greater power that lies within us, not to attack or defend, but to deflect and move beyond. The strength to endure things - unfairness, sadness, misunderstandings, and disrespect. Such power is incredible in the way it allows to “un-become” the person our parents may have expected and allows us to walk past their dreams to who we are. We can still love them (from afar), even if they don’t seem to know how to love us as we are.

We all go through problems with our parents. As we get older we start to understand why 😅

Some great insights, Richie. You should read The Velvet Rage by Alan Downs. Speaks to a lot of the issues around gay men seeking validation and how men aren't socialized by their fathers to be emotionally intimate with other men. This Daddy is proud of you for your journey of self-awareness and understanding. I hope it takes you where you want to be in your life.

I can totally relate I'm much older than you but I'm 55 my parents were divorced when I was two later I had a stepfather who didn't really want to have much to do with me he also had father issues later I had another stepfather and we were fine but I was already an adult and he died I've never celebrated Father's Day not really it means nothing to me I feel your sadness cuz I have my own father issues I heard years later from a friend that my dad called me a faget I'm just glad I never heard it never heard it from him to my face keep your videos going

And, I'm 52 and of course I'm not your Dad, but I'm incredibly proud of you!

Hi my friend I like the you are . I live in Florida I wish be close to the west but my respect to you. I hope you keep up the good person you are I never had a son but you very lovely and kind.. like to know you man.

Do you ever think that you’re overthinking this whole situation,,,,,,, people make other people feel awkward/ uncomfortable only if you give them permission,,,,,,,, YOU alone can change the situation Don’t forget,,,,the world is full of young people who never met their fathers,,,,,, and often it’s a blessing.

Richie...you are a fantastic man, entrepreneur....I am a Daddy and I am super proud of you....keep rock'n it! IMO your Dad has the issues not you...many hugs!

what u said had to be said because its ur understanding, im happy for ur enlightenment but i also have to say even straight boys dont get much love from their fathers either, its a sad epidemic, as u know by now that ur in control of ur own journey and may that journey be filled with hope and happiness 👍

I have been looking for validation my whole life I live a life of Fear, Shame, and self-Hatred. Now at 65 I realize that I lived my life for what my parents wanted and not what I wanted. I wasted my like.

I love the buzz cut.

Reasons for daddy issues: [1] when your dad is either distant & cold; or in & out of your life; or present but super toxic. [2] when you do not have a dad - knowing that he didn't want you, he perished early, or that your mom was a thot. [3] being extremely needy and insecure [4] fear of abandonment [5] if the dad is weak and sick and the kid is forced to care for them [6] you're a leech and only seek older men for their money, stability and gifts. [7] trauma [8] stress and depression [9] extreme favoritism either to you or your siblings

Rings true to me.

Most straight dad's don't like the idea of their sons having relations with men it makes them very uncomfortable.😢

I'm afraid... my suspicions will be validated. You have given me some direction to take though. But, still...

Love

You just need a Daddy to cuddle with. 😘

Hi Richie, I loved ❤your video. Have you ever thought about being an inspirational speaker? I have done some inspirational speeches in the past for different things, mostly medical, that's my background. Just a thought! Look into it. Other than being good for people that you are speaking to. It can be very profitable for you. I have made up to $5000.00 for 1- 2 day speaking ingredient. All expenses paid for. The $5000 was all profitable. Think about it.

❤❤❤❤❤👑🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥👑

My goodness, you're super cute!

Wow....YEAH! So true 👍!

4 jobs?! hope your doing ok 😱

So many gays are so complicated.I am glad I am an Aries.lol

I really think someone has steered you in the wrong direction, this thing about a father wound thing sounds like a croc of shit t me, if you have been ignored or not had a hug or not given you money, I have never had a hug that I remember or a conversation or a handout, the difference between you and me is that your father was alive mine died when I was 5 years old, that was 53 years ago now and though I have had my issues over the year I’ve never put anything down to nothing having a father, yes life would have been easier as a family financially but my mother made sure we never went without, as for your saying god has put you on the right path well that’s another can of mythical worms, take a good look in the mirror and see that you are a grown man and you don’t need to keep looking for answers you just need to live your life one day at a time.

Why would anyone work Four Jobs ,,,,, im not sure that Daddy Issues are a thing over here in Europe. Now Richie. The father issue is not something that should quash your Ambition,,,,,, fathers are just people like any other. And anyone who wants to seek validation from people with a genetic connection like Fathers. Give that up,,,,it wastes time that could be better used making friends you haven’t met yet As for people you already know ,,,, don’t ring them,,, wait for them to ring you As for the Father thing ,,, when or if he rings you,,,,, straight up ,,ASK HIM WHAT HE WANTS. I MEAN EVERYTHING.

not all daddy type gay guys would just treat you as a young plaything.

Daddy bear here i have always felt a better connection to guys younger than me then with guys my age