Owning Alone: conquering your fear of being solo: Teresa Rodriguez at TEDxWilmington 

I talk to myself, we always argue and we like different things.

I envy that

love It

Lol!

That made me laugh

Luana Robbins Yup me too, here in Australia.

can i join you guys? what time are we meeting?

Luana Robbins Lets have a diner.I will cook for you.

Josh Uddin No problem

Tell me when

Thanks ❤️

actually this sounds really good.

Lewis Murphy, I am so sorry you feel this way but you are right, you are not alone. Although it may seem otherwise, please know there are people that care about you that you do not know, and I am one of them. I hope you find happiness and peace of mind - this comes from within, not from outside of yourself. I wish you the very best! X

Lewis Murphy, you are loved no matter what you did there is a chance of reconciliation and there is everlasting love ready to befall on you from the grace of Christ. God loves you and his children, including myself, love you.

Hope you’ve overcome your depression by now. Just remember - this too shall pass as there’s nothing permanent in this world, whether it’s sadness, happiness, etc. Life is like that.

I hope by now you are no longer depressed. I am currently going through just what you were feeling. It's terrible I feel alone even when I'm with the people closest to me and i don't know what to do. I just got a car for my 16th birthday, and I thought that would help but now it feels like the only time people want me around is to drive them places. But the second after I drive them somewhere it feels like they stop caring about me. I dont even know what I want anymore. It just feels like the harder I try to make myself happy the more lonely I feel, and less happy. I dont want to tell my parents or go see a therapist cause I feel like people will judge me, or tell me that I'm wrong for feeling the way I do. Being depressed has such a negative stigma so I try to avoid it, and I act as happy as possible but it just feels fake. I dont feel like I'm being genuine with my self or others. If you have any tips that helped you get over it or deal with it I'd be glad to hear.

Im the same i can relate.

Tungsten when it's a choice

Tungsten I agree. When you say they stick around until they feel like leaving, what do you mean by that?

Or the opposite. But yeah for the most part, it does bring peace

Thank you for this !

I truly agree....

Theitsybitsyspider she did nothing great

Atul Lall Uh, what?

that is bcoz u haven't heard the other side of story, the man's side. He must have gone through a lot as well :)...!! don't u think

Spot on Pam there's two side to every story.

@@fancys4783 well she told nothing about the guy, just nothing how was he to her, how were they spending time in Australia. Thats not fair just got no fair assessment about her situation, just one sided one dimensional story, incomplete, irritating

So relatable

Same.

Swankster My interpretation is that she’s talking about traveling in your own life. Going through your life alone. You don’t have to be with someone to do stuff alone and be faithful to your own self.

This is one of worst ted talks

ty for saving 10min of my life

@Kevin Tewey yeah i was nice to listen to but not helpful since I have hardly nothing to my name and now stuck in the house thanks to covid i would love to travel but cant, I cant even really go in to town what are you meant to do when your stuck in the house and have no friends thanks to being isolated by your ex?

The travel is a metaphor. She's talking about navigating your life alone.

It's not about being tough: it's about self-love and self-respect. When you know yourself, and know how to take care yourself, you can afford to say, and to hear the word 'No', and not be araid or crushed by it.

BigHenFor I think that’s what my lesson has been for my whole journey.

@@BigHenFor Well said ! Kudos:)

@@BigHenFor Well said! Kudos!

Great lines

Relatable

I feel this

Totally.

Muy buena wey jajajjajsjja

that's what paper plates are for, my friend, LOL

@@kateSullivan3927 and disposable cutlery lol

I'm like that also. I divorced at age 30 and now I am 58 and no desire to remarry. I love my peace.

Elizabeth K I feel the same. I love being alone

Darn, I really was hoping. Top of my list is 71-year-old stuff.

Elizabeth: nothing was more Agonizing, terrifying than Marriage to the so called males I married. I was so Alone and was being abused Financially, emotionally, Physically all in the name Of marriage. Never again Will I marry . Look at the Rate of domestic violence Against women and children. The shelters are overflowing.

But these is not being alone, you have empathy here and some kind of friendship here!!

Best advice ;)

hotcarmel12 so true!! ❤️

ehanks

hotcarmel12 well said

geez your hot im tempted?

Come on, do it! :) Start to another city by yourself for a couple days. You can do it!

I loved it, I love it because travelling with others can be stressful.

They're grown women. Are you suggesting that being a grown man makes you stronger?

I feel the same. Couchsurfing helps

Lol I am a woman and I love solo travel. I think Its more dangerous for a woman in general.

That's loneliness, which is differs from being alone. Being alone is an act of agency and autonomy. You can have relationships but don't need them to feel good about yourself. If you really want to reconnect with people, it's best that you that you reconnect with who you are. What things you like doing, eating, drinking, what make you laugh, what gives you joy. Then go out and do those things. The energy you'll give off will be more attractive. Don't take things personally.

@@BigHenFor Agreed, Being alone is far different than being lonely which can happen while in a marriage or other supposedly intimate relationship. For example, if you live with a mate who ignores you experience loneliness along with rejection which combined is extremely painful.

agreed

It's different for different people.

I agree with the above comments you're talking about loneliness NOT being alone!! I'm alone, never married, haven't had a girlfriend in almost 30 years!! It's been tough after I got paralyzed in an accident almost 30 years ago BUT.. I'm alone and I'm doing fine! Sure, I would like a girlfriend but it's not going to bring me down not having one!! I'm comfortable in my own skin and YES you have to be because if you're not strong minded it can destroy you!! On the other hand I'm not TOTALLY alone!!! I have TWO of the GREATEST friends in the world/universe... my best friend of almost 45 years Anthony Duarte and another best friend of 54 years (that's my age) that friend is JESUS CHRIST!!! *_GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!_*

Great comment, couldn't agree more!

hope you're better now mate

Hope you are doing great now. My husband left me last month after being married for 9 years and I am so depressed.

@@beforethelastpetalfallz7888 I hope that you are doing better! YOu got this! Teresa

I hope that you are doing better! Thank you for sharing! Teresa

sue lisak no one has conditioned women to serve others, only sheep follow the herd

I can totally understand what you're saying. I'm from the USA, but of East Indian ethnicity. Indian culture treats women very poorly and has halted their progression for centuries. I do agree that in the past women were conditioned to only have a homemaker role, but today it's very different. I'd say those old gender roles were done away for at least 20 years now. Women get paid the same, and actually have a lot more rights than males today. Just look at sexual harassment cases/domestic abuse/sexual abuse/divorce... Men have far less rights in these areas. However, I'm very glad to see strong independent women making a life for themselves; but I also see a lot of overcompensation/false feminism/man hating from women -particularity millennial women, but crazy millennials are a whole different issue in their own. I just felt the lady in this video was tooting her own horn too proudly when what she went through was just a rough break up... I showed my mother this video and she laughed at this entitled white woman and said she never seen real suffering. My mother also said only spoke of first world problems and that far worse things can happen to a woman than being left at the alter. I see a lot of this "the world should cheer for me" attitude from a lot of white women, particularly in the Silicon Valley area where I live in CA. I mainly feel this is becasue white women, like white males generally have it a lot easier than people/women from other cultures; and so when they encounter any minor hardship that most women from another country/culture would find trivial, they're very quick to throw a parade for themselves. Like you so eloquently said, women from other cultures have had a rough time breaking the mold. My grandmother had to deal with war/civil unrest/genocide/famine/domestic imprisonment during the partition times in India; being left at the alter would've been the easiest thing to deal with for her. This is TED talk so I think only people who very extreme/unique stories should be called to get up on that stage, and for me this lady really had nothing spectacular to say; and this talk just felt more like reaching for attention and that she still didn't really learn much from what she went through. From what you wrote, you sound like a very sweet, wonderful and intelligent woman... I think you'd be better suited to go on that stage and talk over this lady. Being alone is not easy for anyone, whether woman or man... No woman "needs" a man, and no woman is less than any man. I wish you all the best and thanks for sharing your viewpoint.

What if the woman is a never-married single mother over 25? Is that even worse in the Russian culture? Just curious.

I'd love to be a member of your group. Is it online?

sue lisak can you please add me

This is true

P R little B.

Me too. ❤️

how you realized that ? i dont get it? i miss being that happy as when i was a child...i really really crave for that feeling of simple happiness...i can't even smile anymore...

@@user-mi4yc7pr3x I don't know what happened at that stage it's like I just got over it. it didn't last for long once I got into another relationship and then life gets to you, but in the end you have to find inner peace, do you remember what made you happy as a child, was it nature or an animal that made you smile, are you holding grudges against people, because before we can heal we have to forgive, not what action they did but just as a human being. I grow a veggie garden that makes me happy seeing that seed grow into a big veggie, just to cuddle my little dog makes me happy when she is happy, and my husband makes me happy when he is laughing and happy.

@@eyesee1212 yeah it's always good to find another gf/bf. But if they are a strange person it's only gonna make it worse

Thank you! I hope that you are doing well. ~Teresa

thanks a lot

And involuntary, therefore pointless. It doesn't give us what we truly need or want. It's just business. Business is not fulfillment. 💔

Good to see you here🙏. What better life than that of brahmachari.

Don't forget to go MGTOW. 😉😎🖒

if anyone needs some motivation, start right now because if u don’t, a year from now u would’ve wished u started earlier. do it so your future self will thank u!!

J Nick, you are spot on!

Thank you Angel Rose. :-) You made my day. - Teresa

Cheeky Fox you clearly didn't learn anything at all

Cheeky Fox "Trust but verify." - Ronald Reagan. Never trust anyone over yourself. Always be open and a skeptic.

Atul Lall I don't even trust myself

Dont trust anyone even your own self hehehe

Omg yessss

fati fleur big facts

fati fleur. THE ONLY PERSON YOU CAN GUARANTEE TO WAKE UP WITH FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE IS YOURSELF, SO GET TO KNOWN YOURSELF, LOVE YOURSELF AND TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF. I LOVE THIS QUOTE BECAUSE IT IS SO VERY TRUE!

This whole talk is actually problematic from a “white” narrative standpoint, unfortunately.

Thank you! I hope you have a beautiful day!

how you're doing now mate?

@@user-mi4yc7pr3x Never better in all my days haha thanks for asking. Actually going solo on an ayahuasca retreat in less than two weeks as it happens

@@vinylninja found some love in the meanwhile also?

I totally agree, Andy Brice!

agreed

Perfectly said !

I get attached to places

@Christina Reynolds That's called a comfort zone, not commitment

😂😂 yes, she was a mess? Wtf

Exactly.

She used that as her own personal example to show the importance of being alone. Traveling was the platform she used to express this in her talk. Can you not connect the dots? Much like mythology uses stories to express the deeper meaning of how life events effect us on a soul level.

Galaxy’s Animations Yes! Thank you so much for saying that. I wish that everyone with negative thoughts would keep them to themselves. Spread positivity not negativity.

I got that traveling made her feel she was in the now. A concept she had discovered for herself before the book was written.

THANK YOU

She meant the 80s wedding dress.