I want to thank everyone for sticking with me throughout the years even though I have been extremely inconsistent. I have a hard time putting myself in front of a camera nowadays especially with how I make videos, I don't edit anything and it's just 1 take and then I upload it. Thank you guys much love
_Improving Inpatient Psychiatry: A Rant in Twelve Suggestions_ MARTIN GREENWALD, M.D. SEP 17, 2023 substack.com/notes/post/p-136989574?selection=c57284cf-af32-4210-a76a-3e179ae79930#:~:text=I%20have%20had%20to%20force%20treatment%20on%20patients
& this is the cast atm. idk why i enjoy it atm. but i do. - www.youtube.com/@DueDissidence/streams DM me if you do want to check out "America This Week" _JC
Amen! I suffered from schizo affective disorder for years, tormented by 'hallucinations'. I went through atheism, satanism and agnosticism, but then Jesus saved me in the midst of having no interest in God at all. Then, after getting saved, Jesus healed me and eased my mind and protects me to this day. No more daily demonic activity and if I ever see something (which is so rare), I call on Jesus and it's gone! God bless you all and I pray this testimony helps someone. Life doesn't have to be this way because Jesus already paid the price for us to have peace. ❤
I'm glad you're uploading again, dude. I had a severe psychotic episode in 2018. I almost died because I also had rhabdomiolysis which is where a vital protein in your blood leaks out through your urine. It can cause kidney failure. So i had both at the same time and when my mom took me to the hospital i was already in psychosis, but nobody knew i was in psychosis at that point and she told me i was there because they needed to flush my kidneys. I thought it was a prank. Once i went home i had a doctors appointment and tried to gouge my eye out because i thought i was dreaming and had to be restrained by a PERT team. I had an allergic reaction to Seroquel which threw me into acute psychosis. I hadn't slept in 11 days because the rhabdo makes your muscles very tense and you become restless. Then i was put in an ambulance and thought Freddy Krueger was gonna kill me because I hallucinated that a street sign said Elm Street. A week or less prior I had an auditory hallucination of the Nightmare On Elm Street rhyme "One, two, Freddy's coming for you." At that point I thought I was gonna become a killer like Freddy. I was convinced that it was the next step in my spiritual evolution and that it was inevitable, like I would become possessed by a dark spirit. Once I was restrained and taken to the hospital I felt like there were spiders crawling all over me including a big spider on my genitals which scared the shit out of me. Then I thought everyone in the hospital was there for the specific reason of torturing me. At this point I thought I was a pedophile in a past life and that this was the universe's way of making me pay my karmic debt. I heard chainsaws revving and people talking about how much fun it's going to be to torture me. And then I heard one of them say "Aw! This guy again!?" Like I had already experienced this in a previous life. Then i was given a shot of something and had a tactile hallucination of being stabbed repeatedly. After this point I didn't know if I was dead and in the afterlife or what. Then I heard someone singing happy birthday to somebody in a room next to me and I thought I heard a gun shot after the song concluded, like they blew the person's head off after singing happy birthday to them, and that they were gonna do the same to me. I found out later that the loud gunshot sound i heard was actually a large book dropping on the floor. Then someone was pushing a cart down the hallway and I thought there was a dead baby laying on it and that that baby was me and that they were going to dismember me as a baby. Then i heard sounds of the baby being dismembered. Then everytime I heard a toilet flush i thought a piece of me as a baby was being flushed down the toilet, essentially erasing me from existence. Then i heard sounds of people stomping on my lifeless infant body and thought my parents switched souls with evil entities who were there to also torture me. Then i thought i heard the souls of my parents being tortured and that the physical bodies of my parents sitting in front of me were possessed by these evil spirits. I mourned the loss of my parents thinking I would never see them again because I thought their souls were also being erased from existence. I also thought i was being blamed for the death of my sister's stillborn baby and that I was in huge trouble for that because the tv was on and i thought i was watching a news report about me. Then when the head of the hospital came to talk to me i thought he was a private investigator and that I was in big trouble. Then there was a woman in the hospital who was screaming like she was being tortured and i thought it was my sister, as though it was her after what i thought i had done to her baby. It turns out it was a woman who had severe abuse trauma and she was split in the sense that she would talk in different voices as though she was playing out the different people involved in her abuse. I tried to give her a cup of water thinking i was helping and the nurses told me not to. At this point I thought for sure they were torturing her, but it turns out she had some condition where water sometimes made her worse. It was weird. At this point i thought that in the hospital there was a war between the good and evil spirits and it seemed like the evil was winning. I thought there was a zombie apocalypse because there were people crawling like zombies and i could smell a sickness in the air, like a virus. The interesting thing about that is that two years later COVID happened and now there's a connection being made between an episode of the Simpsons where people at Krusty's are being fed meat made of cows who are forced to eat cow meat. Then when the newscaster tries the burger he turns into a zombie. Now there's this new advertisement for 1 cent and free burgers at burger king and mcdonald's which is very suspicious given what i mentioned. It's as though my episode warned me of what is coming. Also, during this part of my episode, my dad asked if i would come with him and i said i couldn't and it felt like we were saying goodbye for good and in 2021 he died from CLL that covid made worse. I believe my episode was warning me of what was coming. I'm no longer afraid of these elites who want to destroy people and control everything. I don't fear death. We are eternal beings, so do not live in fear. I love you all.❤
@@varsha8592 Thank you, dude! I appreciate that! You will too. Love yourself and those around you. Face your traumas. There is nothing to fear. If you get to a certain level of awareness you can feel the energy of people still alive and passed on. It's beautiful. Death is an illusion. Raise your awareness to a certain level and this truth is discovered. Have a good day. Love you. ❤️
Hey Jacob I’m a fan from Greece. Any psychiatrist that I went told me I had bipolar but I have Asperger syndrome “maybe” the only reason that they don’t tell that for sure is that I haven’t take Wais V test yet . Hope you having a great day as well
Nice to see you again. Long time no see. First time I've seen you in a brightly lit room and that is positive. KBT is beneficial as it actually works on real issues instead of standard sessions with a psychiatrist. Keep doing your videos because I think others and you yourself benefit from them. Stigma is shit but you are working on breaking stigma by talking about you on video. Best Regards from Sweden.
High Jacob, I’m so glad your back! I’m sorry you have to deal with jerks! What you have is an illness. It’s their stupidity and ignorance! By doing your video’s you teach people about your disease and give support to others who have the same thing. I think your right people tend to be very self centered and unsympathetic. Take care of yourself! Again, good to see you! Your haircut looks good on you by the way. Just thought I’d add that in. Don’t let people bother you. Your doing a good thing. Thanks for sharing
I’m so sorry you deal with this illness, Jacob. My son is 22 and is schizophrenic too. He suffers with anosognosia though so I have no way to help him, he doesn’t believe he’s ill. I can’t force him into treatment or to take medication and he becomes angry and aggressive if I bring the topic up. Anyway, God bless you and thank you for making these videos ❤
I feel like every time I think about you and check your channel you’ve recently uploaded which is kinda cool. Anyway glad to see you post again you look great! Make sure you continue to try and take good care of yourself. And remember you’re worthy of great things :)
I never had a visual hallucinations or auditory hallucinations ......for 14 years I've been taking antipsychotics for something I didn't have...I was a drog addict they should took me to a rehab facility instead My teenage and Young life is gone........you are in the USA live your life happyly....
Stigma sucks man. I just very recently saw this lady and I knew she was psychotic. She was using the public library computer and she continued to slam the table pretty hard and talk to herself in a cryptic way. People near her just got up and left. I just feel very bad for this lady, wish I could help. I really didn't mind it, because I accept that some people are just wired differently. I knew she wouldn't do anything, she just got up and left afterwards. She was just lonely
Hey man glad you're uploading again Been watching for 7ish years now and I still enjoy watching You look and sound great 👍 I agree with you about the stigma (even amongst medical professionals) being in the way of getting proper help. For 5 years no one even acknowledged my psychotic symptoms because they believed that if I was aware of my symptoms it wasn't a problem. I've only had a few full blown psychotic episodes but experience psychotic symptoms frequently
Sounds insane, and trust me my mind is so dark, there is no human terminology to describe it, but low dose buprenorphine will literally fill those gaps. I know it's a partial opioid, but at the same time, the way we're naturally wired, it helps that part of you that wants to die but doesn't want to get hurt in the process
@jacob I have a lot of experience with this and watching people deal with this. It is absolutely critical that you spend as much time being active and around other people as possible. I took care of my mom and it was shocking how much she improved instantly when people came to visit her, and if I took her somewhere where she was exposed to people for days then she was like a different person You cannot live alone 23hrs a day thinking of nothing of substance and being obsessed with medical diagnoses and video games and be healthy. Our brains require stimulation in all areas/lobes etc. Try to be as active as possible whenever possible. I know for myself and many others, you need to talk to someone MORE THAN EVER when you LEAST want to. In other words the more you want to avoid people or avoid going out etc then that’s when you need it the most.
I fucking hate the MH system in America. There is way too much stigma, AND mental health workers are NOT supported whatsoever in providing care for their patients. Which leads to there being a shortage in helpers. It's all so fucked up. And then people who struggle with really intense MH symptoms can't get the resources the DESERVE which leads to homelessness, substance abuse, and other disheartening things. Idk how the country is gonna fix itself :(
I hear what you say and can relate to the struggles. I love to hear your thoughts and it gives me comfort in relating to someone who has experienced something similar.The world is not a good place but we have to overcome the world.
Hope u make another video soon. Have u had any other girlfriends? I feel like ur my friend. Ur lucky . U seem to live at home and u don’t have to work! That’s luck!! Omg . I feel the same as you alit!!❤️❤️❤️
Jacob, your videos are very relatable and a stress relief. Please keep making these videos. I remember watching so many years ago when your channel name was Ihaveschizophrenia, it feels the same in 2023. You have a knack for making people listen and very clear in putting forth your ideas.
i just thought of your channel and checked it yesterday, trippy to see this upload the next day. hope u are doing well homie been following you for years. also, maybe try doing youtube shorts so theres not as much pressure to talk on cam for as long?
I always enjoy your videos, I think you have a really nice personality. I'd love to hear your thoughts on drugs, or how they may affect someone vulnerable to psychosis or something, maybe for a video idea one day. hope you're keeping well
If you can function in between you are strong dude I suffer with but that is a power source you can power on and you are stronger than normal people, functioning schizophrenia.
I actually fall asleep to your videos it calms me down I also have scitzofrenia and you help me so much IV been listening to you for 3 years now please don’t ever stop uploading you help me.. I do wish I was skinny like you lol! I’m obese from my medication I hate it but I need my pills
i get psychotic episodes from stress and anxiety(mostly in my past, thankfully). from what i remember: its bad and it can happen from stress and anxiety and you're not always deluded, you can just get catatonic and then burst into anger suddenly. currently i just shake randomly with anger but nothing is happening else and yes it does feel like something is trying to take control. I do notice i punch myself and harm myself but thats after i shake and get angry(sometimes im still angry) and yes it feels horrible and stress and anxiety is really horrible when it causes this stuff( id say its more stress). i'll throw some extra stuff thats outside of this that also can happen from my stress: i get paralysis with tension from this stress also, yeah its not fun.(sorry for sounding scrambled here, i was jumping memory to memory)
Hey man I saw your videos back in like uf long time :D I saw your first uploads like 10 years back. I and my mom were fightint schizophrenia, sadly she passed away in 2015 but when I see u know I must say I shed tear of joy, even u still going trough hardships, u look good and u r still here resisting and trying and even more making content for other ppl. It helps me peersonaly and my mom so I hope u will rock on. I know its hard to get trough episodes I saw the same personaly with mom it rly not fun even to watch, I hope the best for u man!!!
If you incorporate liver into your diet, you will feel incredible. It calms me down because it's packed with vitamins. One piece a week. It's delicious in a lot of butter and caramelized onions. There is a connection between diet and our brains/mood. Try changing your diet to heal your brain. It needs a lot of animal fat. Eggs, ground beef, fatty meats, dairy, liver. I wish you well. The medbeds are coming, too. They will remove traumatic memory and restore equilibrium, mentally, as well as heal anything physically. You will be right as rain very soon. The change is imminent, and that is why you are having episodes. You are sensitive to what's coming. Don't worry. It will look bad, but all will be well. They have to wake eveyrbody up with a big event. God has this.
I can't tell you how mentally strong I became after dropping carbs. I feel invincible, and I'm an old fart. I have incredible intuition now and don't care what people think anymore. It's awesome, Dana. Thank you for your corroboration.@@Dana-lj4zy
@@Dana-lj4zy what bad times? And why only a keto or carnivore diet? Fruits and vegetables have a lot of vitamins/nutrients you need too that might not be in meat. Or your body could have a hard time absorbing the types of nutrient in meat but not vegetables and such. Or you can't eat much red meat because you have too much iron. I don't think it's the solve for everyone because our bodies all process foods differently and we need different things. Why are both of you talking about some future horrible event that will awake everyone to a heavy meat diet?
I can literally watch your videos and see your reduction in intelligence over the years from the psych drugs. My younger brother got more and more dymbed down over the years. Haldol was basically a labotomy and the worst drug of all. Haldol actually blocks anout two dozen receptor sites in your brain and it permanently inactivates 3 different types of receptors. My brother doesn't know his own date of birth or 1 plus 1 now and will probably end up in a group home.
