Radical Acceptance In Recovery 

Some positive news, I made it out of the house last night with my girlfriend and went to Publix. I bought a Powerball ticket, scratch off and some Publix Chicken. Bad news I didn't win the Powerball, but I won $10 in scratch off and ate some chicken. Have a good Sunday everyone. Radical Acceptance It's a start I made it to Publix (anxiety was off the charts) but I did it. I have mad Benzo Belly from the Publix Chicken yesterday LOL, one day at a time. I understand what you mean Dan, I am not OK with my current situation, but I accept my current state and know that things are going to get better with time. Much love to everyone

Thank you Dan for giving us hope. I literally can feel the honesty and humility from your videos. I am still on psychward watching all of your videos trying to practice gratitude and acceptance. I am 7 weeks off benzos, very early in this proces and got covid on top of the withdrawals. It is very hard sometimes when your benzobrain is looping those obssesive thoughts but success stories like yours help alot. Keep up the great work. Greetings from slovakia,David.

It’s really extra hard when you are severely protracted and you’ve done everything to help yourself. Never ever have I just given up and have practiced everything to help. Right now I’m so beaten up but it’s hard because others blame you for what’s happened, like you haven’t tried enough and the struggle with those thoughts about yourself are overwhelming already. It’s psychological torture to be in this long haul and not blaming yourself which just makes it harder, especially when you don’t have windows. I’m working on accepting that but it so so hard because I know my journey and I’ve fought to keep going. We’re all different in this and I know a lot who are struggling a few years and it’s not their fault. I too avoided long haulers in beginning, but I became one tragically. It’s heartbreaking and you think it’s devastating in beginning, but this is not like then and was that hard. If this was in my control I’d be healed by now, but sadly it’s not. I even got new symptoms after severe stress and trying to handle it. I’m promised this is ‘normal’ from Baylissa, everyones healing pattern and timeframe is different, some can feel worse, it’s not anyone’s fault though, but it’s devastating.

Blessings of health to you all!

Thanks Dan for your inspiring video. I like your approach of keeping things simple. It's hard to remember the simple things. You have come a long way. Thank you for your continued support.💛

OMG I hit the big time!! I am on TV LOL. Radical Acceptance is so spot on in recovery totally agree. I also have a perfection kind of attitude all or nothing etc (no patience). In a weird way I am thankful I am going thru this because I don't know what else would of forced me to look at myself so deeply in like every nook and cranny. (I definitely wouldn't of said that 2 or 3 months ago) It is really cool to be able to identify with someone that has come out the other end bc it gives a ton of hope. Exercise is saving me right now and I am starting to notice if I don't workout for a couple days or more I tend to slip back into the dungeon. I think it provides some confidence, natural transmitters and rebuilding the BDNF in the brain. Also the diet like you said I am trying to work on not quite there yet junk food was like my one go to for comfort but started to realize it was causing more problems. Thanks for the update and new topic was awesome. I am staying away from the negative stories and honestly have been watching a lot of your content sometimes looping it all day long off and on (thanks benzos). If I can begin to transfer this looping thoughts etc and continue this focusing on positive stuff 24 hours a day LOL I would really speed up recovery or after healed will be able to be successful in anything I do. 4 months clean of everything and it is rather scary but also amazing. If we can tackle this nightmare and turn it into a victory WIN instead the rewards will be worth it. I am starting to see some of the light. Kenny Loggins went thru benzo withdrawal and was in psychosis it sounded like from his new book he has out. Thanks again for speaking regarding this process as it allows me to understand what is happening when in the dungeon and some coping mechanisms to assist in getting out. Hope everyone is well Bob Bobarino

Thank you so much! The fact that you are posting this post withdrawal is so appreciated. I’m still waiting to commence from 10mg Diazepam. So scared and have defo reached tolerance after many months. My brain is telling me I’m not going to survive. Good to know there is hope. Also Tara Brach uses the term radical acceptance, and I loved the concept. Thanks again!

This is a great video. Really positive. I have come off of all my benzo sites. Radical acceptance is key. 25 months off K for me now. Have just had a really bad cold and that has floored me. Everything does when going through bw. ‘ Be exactly where you’re at’. I really like that. Just trying to focus on positive things. Haven’t been outside for 8 days ( mainly through the flu type symptoms). Looking forwards to getting out with the dog for a walk very soon. Thank you. ❤😊

Thanks. I'm a perfectionist and idealist too. It's good to hear someone.

I think it's important to remember that; acceptance doesn't mean approval!

Hi Dan. First, I would like to say a heartfelt thank you for your videos and your compassion and gentle way you express the information. This is the first post I’ve made that is not more generic. I made a mistake. I was feeling desperate and decided to try a med to help with the depression. It went south first night. I feel as though it has set me back. I had involuntary arm movements and burning skin plus an extreme increase in severity of symptoms. I knew better, but I was so desperate. I want to make it out the other side in one piece and alive! The depression is so all encompassing and overwhelming. Now, I have thrown gasoline on the fire of my nervous system, and I’m praying it will calm again. Like I say, I knew better. I knew I was sensitive to meds before the tapering started and the acute withdrawals began, and I still did it. Acceptance…to accept my mistake knowing I was just trying to allow myself some padding while moving through the nasty trenches. I read to be thankful with where you are because it can always get worse. Well, I did it, and it got worse. My taper was too fast, so I’ve been holding for over a month so far. I’ve made several mistakes on my tapering journey, and I had the information. So, I am beating myself up…but, know I need to be easy with myself. Our bodies are so acutely sensitive through this process. Adding, and subtracting, during withdrawal is, in my opinion, not the best idea. But, if you are one who has, we really need to forgive ourselves, accept it and move forward. I am struggling with acceptance on a layered level right now….all you have mentioned as well as my new situation which I created. Probably the lowest point in my taper. Much Love to All.

I hope I don't come across bad it is really hard to put myself out there during this process because I am not really clear as to what I am doing to be honest. I am just in the throes of it and trying my best to survive. This withdrawal has a strange way of making me feel alone when in reality I am not its really hard to explain. Putting my thoughts out in this community is therapeutic and scary at the same time. I am trying to get outside of my head but at the same time I am trying to address why I got here while I am staring it in the face. I hope everyone going thru this is finding ways to cope with this madness. I am very hard on myself which I think is rooted back in my childhood and my continued bad choices of coping mechanisms such as benzos. I have an intense feeling especially thru this withdrawal that I am not good enough hence I think is where my perfection lies always trying to please everyone else while not taking care of myself which doesn't help anyone. Maybe you have to go into the mud to find yourself. I have a ton of love for anyone going thru this and I am learning to actually love myself possibly for the first time in my life. It is wild to look back at some of the things I write and see some progression. Does anyone else have a sense of like a time distortion like holy crap 3 months just passed by. I have mad love for anyone going thru this it is a real test to put it mildly. If anyone is going thru pain during this please reach out for help. You are not alone even though you feel like it. Just typing in here really helps even though sometimes I have no idea what I am saying but sometimes I find an answer during the madness. In typing this I could see why doctors were putting me on lamictal and other things for bipolar stuff like that but the benzos withdrawal does seem to mimic so many other illnesses. This is just a way for me to try and track my thoughts, ask for help, learn, grow emotionally and hopefully help each other in the process. My memory is still really bad sometimes I cant believe I am opening up like this it is so difficult to be exposed going thru something like this but it is freeing to let it out and maybe it can help someone as well. We are all going to get well one day!! Love everyone Bob

Yeah, coming from a guy with thinning hair, accepting that you have really thick hair isn't the best example of radical acceptance. Lol. But man, I really appreciate your videos!! Glad you recovered.

I feel this way everyday...I need help with this and theres noone there to help ...I'm so scared I'll never be ok ...I have to keep thinking this is temporary...I'm just having a bad day today all I can do is cry ugh...

Me too my spine is killing me...and my neck...was on lorazapam for 5 months 1mg. 13 weeks off.....i went threw the benzo hell.....lasted 11 weeks hard core 100km and hour akathesia......then my brain hit a base ball bat deep calm 12th week 11 days deep calm.....then symptoms....

Thank you your words are star dust!

Thank you

Could you please recommend some meditation? I am on my 3rd year of tapering antidepressant. Sometimes the sound or voice of meditation irks me, does that make sense? Like it gets to me and triggers me. I can hear the repeat of the sounds of nature. Or if the person's voice has an accent. Have you heard of this affecting others in wd?

I would like to share some of my new symptoms in withdrawll. I am 9 months out. I am having low blood pressure and difficulties breathing. Did anyone faced this symptoms?

Alright handsome the hair is fine 😆 🤣 I've lost alot of mines through this....... its good you say exceptence is not excepting it... I mean I can't except the shit I've done on and off the drugs. . The anger towards my family... the wanting to kill myself with the pain of this... the shame and the guilt . Everything.. who can except that but your saying it differently compared to others on forums.... im never excepting this. I try to change my food as much as I can to be healthy but I can only buy fresh when I can go shopping... if I'm in a wave I can't get out so need to eat take away and things ..just crap realy but least I'm eating... alot of people can't eat with this .. I've been opposite... my addiction turned to food through this to eat more than I did before I CT...... another great video Dan and thanks for the shout... I've been talking with your friend Bob about symptoms to.... much love to ya ma man.

hopeful

Hi Dan hope alls well with you.... I've got a question here I actually don't know if you can answer but it's to do with taking medication through this withdrawal..... im scared to take anything ..even vitamins cause I know some work on the gabba sensors.... when I stopped the benzo I stopped everything including medication I'm actually supposed to take... martazapine wich Im never taking again and also gabapentin for nerve pain im never taking again and that's because I get prescribed dhydrocodien on top of wich is a opiate medication... you probably know it but I don't... im not a opiate guy.... I've got nerve damage in my neck and it goes down my back into my legs.... I haven't touched a thing in 8 and a half months since I stopped the benzo and to be honest I'm to frightened to incase it makes my healing worse.... what's your opinion on things like that? My family are starting to moan to me to take my pain meds cause they see the pain im in at times but I don't want to touch anythin. Cheers bud .

I was doing some emotional trauma healing today because I believe it was my main reason for using benzos/drugs. I am not sure if anyone else is this way, but it was my past traumas that were my triggers to use benzos in particular. What I believe I found out was I had a false perception of the world like everyone was out to get me. In reality I think I had a false image or mixed signals from the world like it was somehow related to my past traumas. I would be overly sensitive like the world was just poking at my past traumas and I was giving them power. It then would trigger me to use benzos and then other substances. What I also realized was some of the posts I recently removed in this community was because I was afraid of the reaction it may get and when I removed the posts it kind of triggered me. It then gave my traumas, past poor decisions power again then I would feel shame about myself again like I was trying to hide them. I will start this whole process over again my name is Bob Bobarino I am a recovering addict (4 months sober) and I primarily used Benzos, Adderall, Pain Medication, Drinking or heck just about anything to try and dampen my emotional trauma inside. Something cool I learned from Gabor Mate was going back to when I first used Benzos and instead of having intense shame with using them replace it with thanking the benzos because at the time it was solving a problem. I just didn't know they would hurt me so badly. It feels like taking the power of the benzos back and this withdrawal recovery process. My memory is still terrible so if I repeated myself before in previous posts I apologize. Thank you, Dan, for the topic of Radical Acceptance it really made me dig deep and look at why I was dwelling so much on the past and current withdrawal situation. I think a huge reason I was doing that was an intense feeling of shame and then I would eventually create an excuse to use because I have a reason to and give it power. It seems to help me release some of my trauma inside in a healthy way by taking the power back it doesn't control me. I also would self-sabotage good things I would accomplish, feel like I am not good enough beat myself up into oblivion and use again. A big step for me is Self-Love and when I feel good about myself, I can have more to offer when helping other people in need. Hope everyone is doing well. Love Bob Bobarino a work in progress LOL😁