Hey guys, I had some color correction issues in this video. I use my current phone (iPhone 6s) to film LONG time lapse videos opposed to using my Sony A5100, which I use for shorter clips as it gets overheated relatively quickly. Well, the camera on my current phone has a setting where you can lock the focus and white balance and I didn’t figure that out until later. Hence, the yellowing and blueing of the image! My bad! I used to film on an iPhone 5 and didn’t have to lock anything and it always came out alright (so long as I wasn’t using black paper or something) so it was a pretty silly oversight. Sorry about the weird colors!
Thats alright. If I can ask? How did you start? I have a friend who has started to rely on thier prescription drugs way more than the should, sometimes taking them three times a day, and I was just wondering if you knew any signs to help me figure out if thier getting addicted? And if so what they might be feeling to let them choose their drugs? P.S your videos have been helping me so much with connecting with others and reigniting my passion for art that I just want to say thank you for being you. I can tell you put a alot of thought, time and yourself into each of your videos aswell as your art pieces. You always seem to be real and not a persona as I have seen/felt from other channels along with my day to day life and that just makes me think that there are some REAL people out there to try to get to know. So again Thank you, for simply being you.
I found so many parallels between your story and mine and honestly being as much of a loner as I am I can't help but be comforted by people having lived a life similar go mine and I definitely feel less alone and less ashamed about my past. everything you do and represent is inspiring to me Thank you for your art and story
ginger adelle I’m glad to see that others relate to the story of Emily Artful. Well I’m not glad that others chose the same road, just that some have spoken of their similar path. I’m a loner, I don’t feel the need to be surrounded by others, being content in my apartment, painting and drawing. If I start feeling lonely, I just watch a kitten video and it cheers me up right away. Lol
As a recovering alcoholic that almost died from binge drinking in the military, I cannot express how much your story has touched me. I know exactly what you meant when you said you needed to get better. We may never meet, but I want to tell you I love you. From one recovering human being to another, never doubt your inner strength. Thank you.
I love how your drawings have so much emotion, and notice how your older pieces lacked that. I love the sentiment of being “better”. Perfection isn’t possible, changing the past isn’t possible, but being more mindful about your choices now is. We do need to take ownership of our choices and not live passively. We choose to live better.
I’m a 38 year old single mother. My son is 17. He’s autistic. Had some really awful things I’ve had to come to terms with. Been sober 10 years. I started using when my son was 5 and diagnosed. Thought it was my fault. My mother was the one that introduced me to the drugs. We no longer speak. Keep going dear! You’re amazing.
Hello, i recommend that you should watch a channel called Fathering Autism. He has a daughter named Abigail or Abbie who has autism and he is her main caregiver, and he is a really nice, good person. Maybe watching his channel will give you community of support
If you guys don't talk anymore try reaching out. It may hurt and feel intimidating but hey hes your son right? So just try to reach out and make eachother happy. But try to get along with him as a person Instead as just your kid. But I don't know what I'm talking about since I'm only fifteen but it wouldn't hurt to try it
As a recovering iv heroin addict myself (one year clean the end of this month) I just want to say congratulations & so proud of you for your progress. You deserve all the happiness in the world. 💛
I'm literally only 18 seconds in but the titles has already inspired me to find some drawings from 2 years ago when my bipolar was at it's strongest and hardest. I was suicidal, majorly self harming, constantly dissociating and depersonalizing and then popping back into my own mind and out again. I was rude, tired, and done with it all. I drew some dark things. Now I wanna find those and draw them how I would now. Dark and edgy but with cute things too. Yamikawaii is a j-fashion style I like because it literally means "sick cute" and it makes me realize that yeah I was rough and sick and so messed up but hey I'm cute now and I think adding yami-kawaii or just cute elements into a reworking of these dark things I used to draw would be cool! So I'm gonna do that and binge some Emily now lol
Okay. There were so much feels in this video. Your story resonated with me on a very deep and personal level. I've never done drugs or drunk alcohal, praise God, but I have struggled with depression and anxiety for over a decade now. When you talked about the sadness in your art and how you couldn't draw a smile because you couldn't smile yourself, I felt that. I too had a time when all my sketches were filled with sadness, pain, and despair, because I couldn't truly feel joy. And my work has gotten more joyous and hopeful as I've gotten medication, done counselling, and been working on healing and working towards the person I want to be, instead of the empty, bitter person that untreated depression had turned me into. It was really hard to accept that there was no going back to being the person I was before depression destroyed her. But once I accepted that and let go of her, I was able to focus on choosing to work towards the person I wanted to be going forward. That made a huge difference in my life. I suppose, despite having different circumstances, we went through something very similar and hearing someone who went through something that so deeply reasonates with me was shocking. I'm happy you made the decision and effort to turn your life around and that you are now better for it. I am working towards that too. Thank you for sharing your story. It means a lot to me to hear it. Take care Emily. Love from Trinidad.
This is like a Draw my Life and Art Improvement video all at once! :D Not only does your improvement as an artist shows through your new pieces, but your improvement in self hits harder. I'm not sure, but I think in your videos with Sam and the one with the big youtuber you hinted to having experiences like the one on this video, and while you are able to be funny and easy going at times, you are also able to be sincerely honest and self reflective is what makes you so endearing.
You are such a inspiration and the fact that you went through everything in your past and turn out to be one of the most influential person to me is amazing. I love your channel and it really hels me with my depression. I love you emily (not in a weird way, as in you as a person) but thank you so much for sharing this story and being a wonderful human being.
Adore you and your art. Thank you for sharing, not just your art and your life, but your demons as well. Our past helps shape who we become. But it doesn't define us. You are beautiful and I'm happy you grew into this amazing person we get to enjoy now. 💖💖💖
Thank you for this video we need more of this on youtube... so many of us struggled or struggle with drugs everyday and I am one of those people. I've been clean 3 years but 3 years feels like a million right? Congrats emily xoxoxo
Exactly! I've been sober for (almost)5 years and it feels like a lifetime a way, even though 5 years really isn't that much time. When you're living your best life it makes it feel way longer, which is a good thing!
As a recovering addict, I can say my art changed a lot too. I’m in the early stages of my recovery, but looking back, my art was a lot more sharp and surreal when I was using. A lot of the pieces I did while high don’t have eyes. It’s odd.
I know you have already realised this but you've come so, so far from where you were in the past. I can't say I relate on a personal level or have gone through what you have (being only 13) but I can say, that 100%, you are a stronger woman now. Though at the time your issues were hard to overcome and suffocating, they made you stronger and more independent. I've been following your channel for years and just want to say you'll always have my support!
I went back and looked at my art from the beginning of 2017, and it’s all so static. It’s crazy that you’d posted this at the same time, because my poor mental health affected my art in a similar way. I’ve never done heavy substances, but I understand the effects of a disturbed mental state. Since being on anti-depressants I’ve been enjoying my art so much more, and I seem to be improving. Thank you for the video Emily. Thank you for being vulnerable, even though you don’t have to.
You’re story touched me on a very personal level, when I was younger my mom went through the same thing, the heroin and all, and for years was in such a bad place until she lost her arm from damage. She decided to turn her life around and now she’s a great mom who supports her family and does good in this world by working at a drug rehabilitation place, helping people who were once like her. I think you are amazing for being open and sharing such a personal experience, I’m so glad to see you got better and are here today to create this beautiful RU-vid channel. I think your art has improved so much and is over all gorgeous. You are one of my favorite art RU-vidrs out there and I say that quite proudly, you are inspirational and an overall strong person. I think anyone who can over come a drug like heroin has to be incredibly strong willed.
Thank you Emily for your testimony . Thanks for your intelligence and force to overcome this moment of your life . I lost an amazing friend who took heroin . I knew her since i was 11 years old . She used to be generous , full of love and laugh . She was the most creative friend i ever met . I was fascinated by her . She learnt by herself playing guitar , played in a girl band , did the most amazing comics and drawings , wrote philosophy , posed for famous photographer . At the moment she took heroin her personnality changed , she became selfish , agressive , sleeping all day and stopped communication with me . What a waste . It devasted me for years .
Good. For. You.. Emily. It's an awesome and humbling thing to behold a fellow addict overcoming their addiction, AND being able to speak about it without shame. Especially on a platform like RU-vid. From one grateful addict in recovery to another, thank you for sharing your story.
You’re so raw and emotional in this video and I can not get enough of it. People struggle with putting their flaws into perspective and you’ve owned up to it and grown so gracefully. You’re you without apology and I can not thank you enough, not many people are like that anymore. The concept of this video is also powerful. Drawings are memories and the fact that you were willing to revisit that speakers volume on your growth. I wish you all the peace and love 🖤
I would go into a 5 paged rant about how much I am grateful for your channel and your courage and strength to pull away from that previous life, but I think everyone else has said everything I want to say and more. Thank you, Emily.
wow. right away with the first re-draw, i can see emptiness in the original, and just SO MUCH emotion in the update, as if she's holding back, and ready to burst into tears (of either joy or sadness, or relief). And i feel like it's possibly a reflection of yourself at the different times in your life. it's a really special thing to be able to put yourself into a piece.
HI Emily Artful so I just found your channel about 5 - 6 days ago and I love your channel I think you need a hug 👋😊🖐 I'm so glad that your here today and made it through the trials...I was actually offered to Vape yesterday and I got up and left I was scared about the whole situation and this video made me feel a lot better about it I made a promise to myself about 10 years ago when I was five that I would never do anything bad to my body and this video just helped reinforce that promise to myself so I say thank you so much
I'm a member of the church of Jesus Christ of later day Saint {Mormon} and I think that's honestly the biggest influence for me because we have the word of wisdom {don't drink smoke etc.} people make fun of me or tease me for it but idc I am who I am and im gonna stay clean because my body is a temple and should be honored
Thing I don’t understand about vape is that vape is used to try get rid of a smoking addiction? And there’s some people who vape but have never touched a cigarette in their life? Honestly some people these days
Was not expecting this to be such a serious video but I'm so grateful for your openness and bravery because talking about painful times in your life to anyone much less to a bunch of strangers on the internet 💓💕
The "before" on the second piece really got me, it looks like a sad smile, like the person is about to start crying while trying to put on a brave face.
Ugh my heart! Your story is truly inspiring. And I'm glad you've put your past behind you and improved as a person. Your story reminded me of my aunt, and She's on a path to recovery as well. Shes almost finished and looks so much better than what my earlier memories are of her. And I'm glad to know that there are people out there that overcome rough things as well. Thank you for staying so strong and living your life to the best of your ability! ❤💙
Re: the stray squiggles and dots. I used to have that problem. For me it was the constant mini-nods and my pencil would go in whatever direction. Your pen marks look exactly like the ones I would make. Congrats on getting clean and persevering. I'm clean too since 9/11/2015.
I think it's really awesome for you to share your past like this. My sister was a heroine addict for years and for the past year and a half she's been home and out of trouble. I'm really happy you're doing better and in the video you say you don't want an extra pat on the back but I'm proud of you. Plus the art is incredible haha.
I love that you not only realized that what you were doing was wrong and realized your mistakes but you also tried to fix the mistakes because some people just give up and except the mistakes you are such an inspirational person never stop
Well it's kind of impressive that you managed to do any art at all when you were an addict. It might explain why you were able to get better when so many can't. You never entirely lost that motivation.
Emily, you are amazing. I absolutely adore how genuine and raw you are with your viewers. I’m so glad I subscribed to such a beautiful soul. Please continue being who you are, we all love you for that 💖
it's almost beautiful how you can see the meaning in the old art piece where as me at least can't see much in it, it's almost scary. But I also find it beautiful how much you have changed, it really makes the beauty in your art pop.
This is so incredible and beautiful. I know I’m a couple of months late, but the vulnerability and healing in your art/this video is fucking amazing. Thank you for sharing this. You are an inspiration.
I am 12 and have not experienced addiction, but my family has a history of being addicts. My mom, my step sister, my step sister in law, my step dad, and more. My dad unfortunately overdosed in the end of 2017, when I was 9. Addiction has torn apart my family and caused pain to people in my family. Even though I have not myself experienced addiction, this video inspires me and makes me so happy that you have overcome this hard time in your life and built a beautiful life.
I adore you! You are such a strong woman. Stopping an addiction is hard but you did it. I'm glad that you can look back at your mistakes and realize that you can live a better life. Also love the artwork
Now, the “don’t forget to stay out of trouble” hit me more than ever. Im so glad you managed to succeed in your dreams! I bet that was a horrible thing to go through 😔
The part about the emptiness of the paintings really stuck with me. Since I have borderline personality disorder and major depressive disorder I experience chronic feelings of emptiness as well as depression, and looking back on my artwork almost all of it feels empty, sad, or angry. Now that I'm drawing people that make me happy, typically streamers or YTbers, I'm seeing a lot more life in my artwork. :)
I have friends that are recovering, and I do my best to support their goals, but having never experienced the struggle it can be difficult to understand and not get frustrated. I'm the one they call at 3am crying because they don't think they can keep fighting or someone OFFERED it to them and they don't want to give in. I'm so glad you're talking about these things. ❤
Not only is this video beautiful in its self your art work and your story behind the work is beautiful as well . When ever I ask someone why they drew or painted something they always respond with “oh I don’t know “ I believe every artist has a story and a reason ❤️
I think anyone that has gone through something hard and tried to make art during it really can see exactly the pain you're talking about come through in the pieces but I love how you remade these dark pieces and made so so beautiful
Even though this is from 2 years ago, it still touched me (made me cry a bit) but as an artist myself I had horrible horrible depression. I always used art as some outlet. Looking back at it now I can see how truly depressed I was and how I truly couldnt open up to anyone because I saw it as pointless to tell my family. I instead associated myself with horrible people ones who encourage to harm myself and tore me down instead of bringing myself back up. I even look back at it now and call myself rather stupid and immature for what I did. It was my own fault. Now I'm getting help for my depression and have much better friends to help me. I can truly see how my drawings have changed. Yes I still have my moments where I get depressed and let it all out on a piece of paper. I know I cant just make some disorder disappear, but I can still help myself as a person and move forward and try my best to put more thought into my own needs and my own self. Sometimes you need to be selfish for yourself to help find what you need to improve on or what makes you happy in general.
Thank you for opening up to us Emily, we all love you so much ❤️ Your channel is such an inspiration to me I love how your new pieces can build off of your originals, instead of bashing them or criticizing your older art
My father recently passed away due to a heroin overdose, and I cannot thank you enough for putting your story out there. It's really a tough tough thing and it's awful to witness someone going through an addiction to it-- I hope this video helps prevent someone ending up in the same situation you did.
This is an AMAZING video! I love how raw and honest you are! I’m a recovering heroin addict so I understand EVERYTHING you are talking about in this video! That drug steals your happiness and renders you empty! I see the huge difference in your redraws you were fantastic then but your incredible now just the amount of life and light you put in the new ones were beautiful! I just wanted to say that your incredibly amazing and you have come so far and fought so much and it’s more then worth it! And seeing someone like you not be ashamed of who you were and still being successful in life gives me soooo much hope! It makes me be able to believe in myself more and know I can achieve anything if I just try and believe in myself! So I want to thank you for that! Thank you for being honest,thank you for being real,thank you for just being you because who you are is just perfect! I love your video and I love your art I’m look forward to all your videos! So please keep them comin lol! Keep up the amazing work you can do it! And I’m not expecting a response honest I don’t mind either way I jut want you to see this and know that you do matter and what you do and talk about does matter and it does make a difference and is beyond helpful! Thank you for making me know I’m NOT alone in what I’m going through! Ok this is already wayyyyy to long lol sorry about my rambling haha!! Have an amazing day and I can’t wait for your next video! Thanks again❣️ 💞Chrystelle 💞
Stories like yours remind me of how thankful I am that I'm dead scared of hospitals. I've had the urge to do terrible things to myself but every time I think what if I end up in the hospital. It's a terrible fear and I want to fight it, but I'm so thankful it's been there when I was at my deepest points. Thank you for sharing this and showing these things about yourself.
I was touched by your story. My boyfriend was in the Army and he saw alot of terrible things when he served. He developed severe alcoholism and DXM addiction. He is recovering okay, going to therapy, and has been sober for a few months and I'm just filled with hope for him now. More than ever. Thanks Emily ❤
You and your art mean so much to me. You have this motherly fee that I just don’t often get to experience, even with my own mother. I was... around 10 I believe when my thoughts were invaded with “what would happen if I jumped? Right now? Would anybody truly miss me?? Would my mother miss me..?” At the time I concluded that she wouldn’t. She found out about me supposedly suicidal thoughts. She didn’t help. She told me stories of how I would be locked away in a padded room never to see my family or friends again. You and your art provide so much for me. I love seeing the babes. I love hearing your advice. And now I know how much “stay outta trouble” really means. Of course EmilyArtMom. I promise I’ll stay out of trouble.
From one addict and artist to another, thank you. I feel for you and I have been in the places you described. I’m glad you’re sober now. I’ve been sober since September of last year and it feels so much better to be alive.
Wow the improvement is truly inspiring 💋💙 I loved this video so much thanks for opening up and showing your art! Tbh the old art you said was “bad” surpasses anything I could ever do.. I love art and sketchy I’m just truly really bad at it and that’s okay for me because I do it for therapy 💜
I have a very a similar story to you and this and your coffin video really really spoke to me. I was an IV user for 3 years, bounced around between running and rehabs until I got pregnant with my son. I’m still not completely clean, I’m prescribed subtex and it helps me get through the day to day, and I will admit I have slipped up twice since I had my son 7 months ago.. but my husband and I are steadier now than we’ve ever been and finally independent and in our own home. I started getting back into art at the end of my pregnancy after losing my connection to it while in active addiction and your channel is such an inspiration to me. Thank you for sharing yourself on here, you are a truly special person.
You are your own hero for getting out of that black hole! And you are a great artist. And yes, there is s drastic emotional change in these before/after. But also you definitely developed and progressed as an artist, your technique. You go baby girl, you are amazing!
I really love how candid you are about this topic. It's a great example of how much people can grow and change. Thanks for sharing another part of yourself with us.
I like how you mention how you appreciate the macabre but want to do something different, add emotion where it was previously lacking. This makes me want to go back to the sketches I made when I was suicidal as a teen and young adult. There was some dark stuff and I want to see how I can recreate them in my 20s in an exponentially better place. Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable side of your life, you're touching so many people with your story.
Your motherly instinct really shows through in this video, it's amazing how far you've come. You keep teaching us every single time you upload, thank you.
You’re so inspiring. And I’m so happy that you acknowledge it was your choice to consume the drugs. So many people I see online say it’s a disease and that it’s not their fault when they chose to take the drugs in the first place. I’m so happy for you, your art is amazing and has improved so much. 💕
This video literally put everything I’ve been going through into words. I struggled with drugs for 9 years and I had to choose to live a better life while being haunted by the things I did in my past. Thank you for posting this. Art is the main reason why I’m alive and the only thing I had left to focus on. You’re truly amazing.
Thank you for opening up like that, it takes a lot of courage. I’m so glad to hear you’re on a healthier path now. I have a friend who went through a similar struggle and she also chose to have a better life. Wishing you and your family all the best in 2019 🥰
I felt the remorse and sadness coming from the redrawings. You surely draw them while looking at the old one and rethinking...reliving what happened while you redraw them into a more honorable way. You chose life and to journey through that painful time... you have my unconditional respect. I now how it feels to walk through hell. Currently stil am, so it is wonderful to see that there will be someday a better day... to rest up from all these hardships.
Wow! Good for you on getting clean! This is so refreshing to hear, really. My uncle died of a heroine overdose in 2017, and I couldn’t be happier to hear anybody coming out of that. He was in a dark place.
This is incredible. Seeing your progression and even the comparison between the drawings from when you started doing drugs and before you did... Your art is beautiful, especially the eyes, so full of emotion and a look that"s so human... This video was truly amazing to watch. Keep up this amazing work and inspiring others.
I love how open you are in your videos, and that even with all the trouble you've been through, you overcame a dark past and have now found utter happiness. I'm glad I could be here the past few years to see all of your wonderful creations. I love you Emily 💞💝🖤💜💛💚💙💟💗💖💕💓❤💘
Emily you are so honest and open about your experiences...its very nurturing of you to share all of this and you are so inspiring to so many of us...I love watching your art and hearing you speak...keep up the good work
Your second piece (not the redraw) actually looked very hopeful to me. you talked about the agressive shading while I thought it added so much contrast that it felt like it's a face that is finally seeing the light after very dark times. Looking up at a very strong light source (the sun?) while peaking out from a dark cave. I usually don't comment this long and it's my first comment on your channel but I thought it was interesting.
as a recovered drug/alcohol user and recovered self harmer, this video hit home for me. brought me to tears. during that time in my life my artwork had a deadness in the eyes as well and similarly to you, im able to incorporate real emotion now as well. thank you so much for sharing your story and your artwork with us, you're so strong and such a huge inspiration. ❤️
Thank you so much for sharing all of this with us, Emily. I know firsthand how hard it is to reveal personal trauma or a deep, dark secret; and doing that on RU-vid must have took a lot of courage. I also know firsthand how it feels to be alone when you have a problem, like chemical reliance, depression, etc. I used to feel that I was the only one with a problem, the only mistake in a perfect machine. So seeing others talk about their experience and knowing that they had overcome it was (and still is) a huge support. Thank you Emily, for making me feel (and believe) that I can be okay again.
I’m not going to lie, that intro was legit! It was poignant, and beautifully delivered. I love how you revisited your old artwork and really showed your personal growth. I know that everyone here is very proud of the person you have become. Seriously, this video is wonderful! ❤️ Thank you!
This really hit home with me, because it’s completely different and nowhere near as serious as drug addiction, but I really struggle with binge eating and dysmorphia and I’ve turned to art to try and manage my struggle. I’m hoping it works because I can’t find any help medically, because I’m not anorexic or bulimic. I’m really glad I found you.
I'm so happy you shared this story. Good for you! I've been down that road myself and getting clean and STAYING clean is one of the hardest things to do! I also notice how shaky I am now with my drawing. It's SO annoying but it's getting better, it was like learning everything all over again. Even tracing a single line can be challenging. Thanks for sharing your story, it's nice to know you're not alone ❤
my cousin went through the same thing. she's now married, has a child, and lives in a beautiful ranch. i'm so proud of her, and now i'm proud of you, too
your honesty and bravery are always authentically inspiring. Not that you need my approval, but im very proud to see that you were able to overcome the hardships from your past and move forward. Its something im trying my best to do, so thank you for providing hopefulness.
Thank you so much for this. I VERY recently started painting (like 2 weeks recently) as a therapy to help my brain keep busy while I try to stay off heroin. I found you when I looked up an art 101 type video and immediately subscribed. I've been playing your videos as I paint at night, and tonight this video came on. I'm particularly struggling this week, and this video helped so much. THANK YOU again for all you do, and for mostly just being YOU.
you’re incredibly inspiring. im currently struggling with amphetamine dependence and it’s good to know im not alone. and going forward instead of trying to fix my past is absolutely great advice. thank you ❤️
I happened upon you last year and you really inspired me to incorporate more of my drawing into my bullet journal. Drawing always made me feel happy but growing up it was always frowned upon. Even though I never got to pursue art as a career it’s nice to find solace in my art again and watching you taught me that. ❤️
This video made me cry. Not because of your story (although that was tear worthly, I just didn't cry over it in THIS video). It wasn't the tragedy of your mistake. It wasn't your art and how it showed psyche. Truthfully, it was your voice. Hearing the sadness, and guilt, and pain, and regret in your voice. That made me cry. Hearing you try to hold it in, trying to keep a straight face, it was heartbreaking. I'm so glad to see how you've turned your life around like this. It really goes to show anyone and everyone can make a change.
I didn't think i could find another RU-vid art channel i liked but i LOVE your channel! Thank you for being open and talking about all this in a teaching manner. I'm so happy you are doing better💗
Thank you for sharing your story I needed this today!! I struggled with addiction almost all my life either watching my mom lost to meth or myself to addiction 4 years ago everyday is a struggle but you keep going and trying just like you said!!
I've been subscribed for awhile now, just wanted to say I love how real you are. Not many people can be so open and honest, as well as your artwork is dope as fuck!
I'd didn't know about any of this but I am super proud of you for making all those changes and turning your life around. You should be so super proud of yourself, I wanna cry ahhh!!!! ❤❤❤
Im really glad you were able to get better and were actually strong enough to overcome such a scary thing.. I could NEVER imagine what you went through.. Your art really speaks to me and inspires me to pick up the pencil again and start drawing! Im not really happy with my art right now but when i see your drawings it gets me motivated again!
