You gotta do what you gotta do! Lol I put mine in the boppy when he was tiny while I did all that now he’s walking and exploring and getting into everything and it’s sooooo much harder I dont wanna imagine when my next gets here in April.
I put mine in his little rocking chair and he just watched me poop and happily played with the toys hanging over him. Hubby tried the same thing once and told me baby started crying before he could even start his business. 🤣
Ashley, just so you know, you and your channel are incredible: I L.O.V.E. every single video you have ever made - how is that possible? You geniuuuuus!!!! ;-) Also, on a different note, this video in particular just made me wish that we were actual friends and I didn´t live across the Atlantic so that we could literally have coffee and chat every other day! haha Much love to you guys!
Love the Danish way of parenting book. Particularly how instead of 'terrible twos' they see it as the boundary testing and independence age. So much more positive.
Dividing love...does not happen...even with our 7th😂. What I have found for me was that going from 1 to 2 children and from 4 to 5 have been the hardest transitions. I have found that as long as I keep a proper schedule/ more of a routine and make sure I spend 1 on 1 time every day with each of my children the mom guilt stays at bay. As we have had our younger children our olders have been so excited to have "their" babies....at our home we fight over who's turn it is to play with the little loves...so never worry about adding to your home in this way, but you will definitely know when you home is complete.
I know it's not the same but I'm experiencing 'mom guilt' about my first baby because I don't want my cats to feel neglected. These cats have been my babies throughout my years of infertility and we are all close. I would hate for them to feel pushed out. 😿
I think every mom goes through it when going from one to two. It’s such a mental struggle. Luckily as Ashley mentioned, it’s totally unwarranted in the end. Love is so amazing.
Yeah my biggest fear is exactly what she said, “am i going to love this baby as much as I do my son”? “Am I going to start neglecting my toddler now?” It sucks but Ashley is great at reassuring!:)
For the picky eating, I have a "snack shelf" in both the fridge and cupboard stocked with healthy choices so that if there is a refusal to eat they can go choose an alternative...which I rotate Montessori style too...
It felt so good to hear another human speak my thoughts. I've been having anxiety attacks over having another... and about not. You're the best hun! Thank you for your light!
Everything you said is so true and then some...also I can’t remember the last time I went to the bathroom by myself unless my kids were in bed 😂...even my dogs join the party 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏼♀️
Hi Ashley! What a great video, I feel like I always learn so much from you. Research for the future, is how I like to think of it. I'm sorry people can be so judgy - you're obviously an amazing mother, dedicated to raising amazing kids. Also, recently saw your instagram story of Mia's new set up in the play room. Will you be making a full video on that? Please say yes! :D
Such an interesting video. I’m not a mother, but I feel like the complexities and mental/emotional/physical nuances of having another child is often overlooked. Lovely video 🖤🖤🖤
“I often find myself putting my own needs on the back burner.” I feel like this is motherhood in its entirety summed up in one sentence! But you wouldn’t have it any other way ❤️
I definitely had mom guilt. My boys are two years apart too. Leonidas, my second, was colicky so it was really hard but honesty now that they're 2 and 4 it's easier than having one kid. They love playing together.
We’ve just welcomed our second child with an exact 2 year age gap. So this is so helpful for me, even helped give me an insight to how things might be in the future! Thanks for your honesty ☺️ Your doing great 🥳 x
I am a first time mom, my daughter is about to be 4 months. Your videos have completely changed my views on parenting and I've used many of your Montessori and parenting methods, they have saved my life! I feel alot more confident with my baby! You seriously are inspired and you are SO cool! Thank you for your videos 🙏🏻❤
"its a pretty good skill" lol LOVE it.... actually it's an AMAZING skill!!! And don't be afraid to take a nap instead of editing for us....WE'LL all still be here to support you when you wake up 😘
Thank you so much for making this video! First of all, I recently found your channel and am learning SO much from you and am now taking small steps to make our house more Montessori-friendly for my 2 year old. I didn’t even really know what Montessori was before finding you, so thank you SO much for sharing your knowledge and your passion with us. You’re doing a really important thing. Second, I don’t even do this but it got me thinking as you were talking about your stuffed backpack- what if you had a little bin in your car that always had extra changes of clothes, diapers, snacks, etc so you didn’t have to always worry about having it on you? I know some things you NEED in your bag, but things like clothes or an emergency stash of non-perishable snacks so it was just one less thing to worry about forgetting to pack. Just a thought, and advice I might actually use myself 🤪 Thanks again for all you do. We’re thinking about expanding our family soon so this video couldn’t have come at a more perfect time ❤️
I’m currently 18 weeks pregnant and I wish to have two kids eventually, so thank you for making this video, Ashley! My sister and I are 15 months apart and that is seriously the best thing that has ever happened in my life, having her! So I’m hoping to manage to have two kids who are also as close apart, just because I don’t remember a life without my sis and I never could imagine one. ❤️
I don't have any kiddos of my own yet, but I totally get the whole "not being allowed to go to the bathroom in private" thing! Being the oldest of 4 sisters and having lots of younger cousins to babysit, I feel like I've spent half my life being followed to the bathroom. Even now, when I look after my 3 yr old god-daughter for the day, she follows me... The struggle is real folks! 😂
I had a hard time eating as a daycare provider, but if you can prepare everyone’s plate at the same time with Kylie either helping or busy at the table. OR plate up at the table. Say a prayer or say something you’re thankful for about your day, then eat together as a family (or in my case group) and enjoy your girls! If you can work out an after lunch nap for Mia and clean up with Kylie before an easy rest time for her if she can 😊 just an idea, but I love this because I need the structure of a schedule with 9 kids from 3m-7y 😳
Ashley, thank you so much for sharing your experience with us! I started to follow you when my son was 6 months old and your video about BLW was my favorite)) now he is 1,4 so me and my husband started to think, hm, maybe we should think about the next step and trying to have one more baby)) and your video makes me think that no matter how difficult things can be, it's worth it! Sending you love and hugs after the 11th of may from Kazakhstan and thank you again!
I only have 1 kid and I never go to the bathroom alone. If I dare to lock my toddler outside the bathroom door, she would kick the door and cry so load like I abandoned her. Even daddy offered her company, she would say no daddy, mommy mommy mommy....
Yepppp I take naps all the time when I can with my crazy 19m old. I want to enjoy my summer and then I think we’re gonna try for baby #2. We’re still debating 😂 cause yeah the only free time we get is when this girl is sleeping. We don’t rely on babysitters or family for much help. She’s only spent the night out at grandmas once and it’s when we had our housewarming party 😂
Oh my lanta! This was so helpful! Thank you!! I’m due next month w our second baby. Our first will be exactly 2.5 years old. The very first topic you touched on, really hit home- I started to tear up (probably my hormones) but I have that fear- I love my first so much and to hear how your heart just opened up more for Mia was so validating. Love your videos! Thanks Ashley! Ugh... dreading the lack of sleep thing tho 😭
You are an amazing mom. You are such an inspiration to me, a mom of 2 (just had my second in Nov 2019) & my toddler is 32 months. We have had such a difficult time transitioning with my older one since the baby came. I look at your day in the life vlog with awe. Thank you for all your tips and I look forward to your videos every week.
I have a three year old and a seven month old. They both fell asleep during the day this week. And I got an hour and a half nap. Let me tell you...that has only happened maybe 3 times this past 7 months. Glorious!!
Coming back over half a day later to finish this video and your description of the butt wiping and nursing situation is soooo true to having two kids 😆
Can you explain a little bit more about why you wanted to have 2 kids versus 3 or 4? My husband and I are weighing the pros and cons of having 2 versus 3, and I'd like to know why you found being one of 3 (and then 4) to be too much. Thanks so much!
Thank you for mentioning mum guilt. That is exactly how I feel now - like I'm betraying my daughter because I'm pregnant again... never knew anyone else feels the same way! I just love how open and honest you are. I guess it's not easy to remain authentic when you can be so easily judged... that's why I thank you even more ❤❤❤
I 100% understand where you are coming from. I have a 19month old daughter and a 3month old son. Every single point I was like yep, oh yeah, I feel you haha your doing amazing! Xo
Love this! When you said you have a skill of nursing & wiping 🧻 😂 story of my life. I too have a 3 (daughter) & 1 (son) year old. Two I’d definitely time consuming but worth while. From one momma to another wishing you & your family lots of happiness & love & also to mommas doing more self care 🥳
Thank you for this video, I needed it so badly - I’m expecting my second baby and there will be also 2 years gap beetween them. Did you compare your emotions and love towards them during pregnancy as a part of the mom guilt? You mentioned that the great love for Mia - as strong as for Kylie - appeared after giving birth. I feel guilty for not having the same emotions for both of my children even though it’s the beginning of second trimester 😕
Thank you so much for making this video! I recently found your channel, I'm learning SO much from you and how to incorporate the Montessori approach into our home (I´m watching pretty much every single video haha). Also, we’re thinking about expanding our family soon so this video couldn’t have come at a more perfect time. I do have a "small" question, due to we moved to a different city and don´t have any help (also because of covid...) How do you manage not having any help (but Mike)?? Or do you have a nanny when you have a date night with Mike?
I really needed to watch this. I'm 2 months pregnant with my second child (constantly sick and tired) and my daughter is 11 months! I've been going through the "mom guilt". Thank you for this honest video. We all need "real talk" with more mamas more than we think!
Hi Ashley. Love your videos & content. My son is Mia's age. I'm conflicted as to whether a two year age gap or three is ideal . Please share your view. Thank you .
At three years old, a child will definitely be a little bit more capable of independence from the very beginning, which would probably make things a little easier for you. Then again, at two, Kylie wasn’t quite yet into the jealousy stage, that was only a more recent development. So it made the initial time of having a new baby in the house easier for her to manage. At three, I think the jealousy would be in full swing right from day one. 🤷🏼♀️ But it also depends on your child’s temperament. So there really is no right answer to this.
i have a 3 year old and 3 month old. there is no jealousy towards the baby. and there are moments where she plays independently. but she still does not understand the concept of "give me a minute". if she wants me to play with her NOW, she means now, and i just can't do it like before. she also never had tantrums at 2....but now that she's 3 she has become soooo much more stubborn. so i think either way, it will be hard. but its not forever!
@@frizzzx86 Thank you for sharing your experience. Me and my sister were born 2 years 4 months apart. My mom says that I wud demand to be held & fed and wat not. She was pretty chilled baby , me on the other hand wud occasionally demand my mom's attention. I was put into a playschool for 4 hours everyday & it was a game changer. I loved the school. Mom & sis had their time together. Lol that was 29 years ago. Hope it helps. Good luck to you. Love to your daughter & baby 😍
I stumbled on your channel and now I'm hooked. Thank you for your frankness and realness of your videos. I'm drowning right now I just needed to hear another mum just share how they manage. My girls are 3yrs apart...youngest is now 12months and oldest 4yrs so I can relate to what you are talking about
My son is almost 2 years old and still wants to be in the bathroom with me, eventhough i'm doing nr2. When he was younger he'd want to sit on my lap ._. Guess it's just one of those things that becomes normal!
It's because your sitting still, if you're not moving around they think that's the time they can have you to themselves. My kid climbs on to of me the minute I sit down even if it's just to tie my shoes.
OMG I'm just 3 minutes into the video and it already feels so relatable - I knew I wanted 2 kids but when my daugher was born, I started thinking "how am I going to split the love for her in two so I can love another child?"
My kids are April 2017 and June 2019 and so much of what you said is exactly how I feel. My Son gave up naps as well but he does 1h of quiet time during my daughter's afternoon nap. I don't know if that would work for you but it is the much needed break in our day for everyone
Fun tip from German moms. I’m leaving in Germany, although I’m not a German. And something that I’m seeing a lot, is that the moms here as soon as the child is around 2yo the child carries his own backpack with their stuff.🤔 At first I was like ”wow, what a lazy mom”, but the more I see it, the more I get it and it’s actually brilliant. And kids actually love it, because they feeling older, more responsible and of course the backpacks are cute to die🥰. Of course we are talking for a small Kids size backpack. And I was able to see a few times what they are carrying inside and it was 1-2 diapers, a small water bottle, an extra bottom change (travel roll packing) and a travel size water wipes. German parenting style has many things in common with the Montessori parenting actually. They also get rid of the stroller as soon as possible. In my opinion, waaay to soon🤷🏻♀️ I’m constantly seeing tired toddlers everywhere because of the stroller😅
Thanks for sharing this. I think this is one of the most under-talked about things of parenting. Mine are 18 months apart (2 and 3.5). Its helped to let them have 45 minutes of screen time after getting ready in the morning so I can get stuff done and having a designated "quiet time" in the afternoon while the youngest is napping. I listened to a pod cast where a mom would put her children in different rooms to play and set a timer. She'd say, "I'm going to hide, come find me when the timer goes off." Eventually she worked up to 30 minutes of alone time.
Thank you for being so honest!!! I'm a mom of three girls 2, 4, and 6 yrs old and I sooooo wish this video was out before I had kids. All the new mom's need to watch this! It's difficult and not always bunnies and rainbows, but that still doesn't mean it's not the best thing ever 😁❤️. Loved the whole video and I can Soo vouch for the sleep and bathroom parts of this video 💯 haha TAKE ALL THE NAPS!! ok 😂🤣. And you will never poop in peace again 🤣🤣❤️
It's great to hear your experience! And also a little bit scary! 🙈 My son is 2 years old now, and we decided we wanted to wait until he is older before looking for a second child... I'm still breastfeeding, the baby doesn't sleep through the night and is not "potty trained"... So you could imagine how hard it will be... But I've seen all your videos, you've done a really great job raising those beautiful girls... You truly are an inspiration for me to try to be a better parent to my kid... ❤️
Hi i'm a mom of 2 kids 21 month apart and i'm so agree with all you say, my younger is 6month old and it seems like i don't live anymore. I hope it will be better in a few month... (i'm french sorry for my poor english)
We are about to begin ttc-ing for baby number 2 and this video was very helpful and brought to mind things I wouldn't have thought about. Thank you for creating it 😁
Thanks SO much for this video! I am 37weeks pregnant and have 3 years old boy, working on startup... I feel lately beeing disconnected from my older one and being nervous and unpatient, worrying all the time how I am going to do this.. this calmed me down, I know we will do this together ❤️
I love this video Ashley! I’m 12 weeks pregnant with my second (my toddler is 21mo) and this video is such a relief honestly. My biggest worries are about loving my second as much as my first and my toddler not getting the same amount of attention she does now. I’m doing everything I can to prepare but I love the realness of this video ❤️
I'm usually not the commenting type of person when it comes to youtube videos although loving your content very much. But I just have to say it: THANK YOU for the toilet story!!! I felt so weird when I had to pee with my little daughter in the baby sling. And it's just something you don't ever have people talk about - I'm so happy it's not just me! Btw: she's a year old now and very interested in what I'm doing there, so I literally have to hold her back a bit because otherwise she would try to stick her head into the toilet to watch me wipe myself clean... Also thank you so much for all your videos! They help me so much. Sometimes I just feel like, Hell, it would be so much easier (for the moment) to just say "no, and that's the end of it" or simply let her rage with some seemingly stupid whim. But then in a quiet moment I sit down and watch one of your videos and it motivates me so much to go on with what we started.
I laughed so hard with the transparency of the last few minutes. Thank you for sharing! My daughter will be 2.5 when our baby comes in July, and I found this very helpful.
Oh my gosh I really feel you with not being able to totally engage in the imaginative play...i really find myself struggling to do that with my 4 year old and entertain my 2 year old at the same time. Ive had to become pretty creative with play time lol
I just LOVE your honesty, the way you talk and the valuable content you put out there for us, fellow busy mommas. Thank YOU for sacrifising your me time so that we can learn from you ❤
I’ve found all of the videos of yours that I’ve watched to be so informative and fun to watch! I’ve always loved watching family channels and I’m no where near even planning on having a kid yet 😅
cant imagine how youre managing with 2 kids. your must be entitled as supermom! my mom said she used to take me to washroom when I was a toddler, open the tap n let me play with running water. but I wait for someone(hubby, in-laws, maid)to hold my baby while i m in washroom as i m scared of taking a curious baby to washroom. yeah, dads must know the luxury of spending time in washroom.
What a great video! This video was spot on. First and foremost, I want to say you are doing a fanatic job. I am a mom of 2 boys. They are 2 years and 6 days apart, to be exact. They are currently 5 and 3. It was extremely difficult I recall. Let me assure you that it does get easier as they get older. It gets easier in certain aspects but difficult in others such as : the older one has homework now (a lot ) and it’s difficult when your gone for 12 hours a day and have limited time with them. They will be arguing over the same toy a lot which will be a challenge. However .... with that being said, I am beyond happy with the decision of having them close in age bc they really are best friends. There bond truly melts my heart ❤️ . You’re doing a fantastic job Mama !
Best video ever! I nodded so often, laughed a lot because I recognize so many things (especially the nursing and wiping 😂) and even had tears in my eyes in the end. I have an almost 4 year old girl and 15 month old boy. It's absolutely exhausting and the most beautiful thing at the same time.
Hi, Ashley I’m expecting a baby in Aug while my first child will be 2y6m. I’m not sure how did you handling 2 children, like different sleeping schedule and daily routine … Could u pls share some of your tips or advice with me, that will be much appreciated ❤️
I was literally just looking for this video and it auto played from a different one of your videos! And I’m having mommy guilt because my 5 year old is sharing a room with his baby brother!
Aahh finally watching this again now im at 7 months just 2 months nearly left until the baby arrives and im starting to stress out about preparing the environment and preparing my toddler. I can already feel how exhausted i will be. Home education is a jour ey i am planning on starting properly but i think that will happen after the baby is settled a bit and i have more independence in driving at my own pace. Ahahha the mess is something i am getting used to now taht our cluttered environment is a point of interest for the exploration of my toddler. She's never really interacted with all the clutter i guess because it was overwhelming but is really keen on climbing up and getting into everything trying to use everything or drop it and hear what sound it makes or break it. I am running out of ideas to deal with the desire to explore these sensory experiences but unable to take control of the environment. 😩 Hahah the testing limits stage is so strong right now and i am just barely hanging on but cannot imgine this with a newborn. We have had days pretending that 'teddie' is baby and i feed him whilst playing with her or he is beside us on his mat looking at a mobile or looking at us whilst we play and that i am holding him or have him in a wrap whilst we prepare and eat dinner.
♥️♥️♥️ I agree 100%. I have two little girls 4 years and 4 months and you just described my life right now xD especially the bathroom I feel like it's a parade everytime I go
Oh how I wish my son would chase after the shopping cart... He's a runner and I'm the chaser and terrified to have this second baby in a couple months, lol. I don't know how you do RU-vid on top of it all, I did the RU-vid thing for awhile, but it was too exhausting for me. I still make videos for fun now and then though, lol, to capture the memories :)
Have you heard of or know about elimination communication? Even though your younger one is nearing the age of one, if you start now, things in the diaper region can get a lot more predictable. I equate it to the Montessori philosophy of observing you child and giving them the right environment to eliminate. When you understand their needs of when and how They pee/poop, you’ll notice a lot less blowouts and wouldn’t need as many clothing/diaper changes. It’s the one thing that got us to easily potty train our toddler without issues. She stopped pooping in her diapers around the age of 12 months. Diapers when invented weren’t intended to be used as full time toilets anyway. Check it out and if it clicks, it may make your life a lot easier!
Oh I feel your pain with no naps. I'm pregnant with my second girl and my older (2.5 yo) daughter is doing exactly what Kylie is doing... no naps and picky eating (If it were her way she'd eat blueberries, yogurt, and animal crackers all day long). Being in third trimester now it is so difficult with no naps, but it's even more draining trying to get her to actually take a nap. There have been a couple days that I've fallen asleep next to our couch while she watched TV and it saved me so much sanity and health to have a nap those days. I hate to let her watch TV (I know it's against montessori), I only do it when I literally have nothing else for her to do. After letting go of guilt for having her watch in order to squeeze in a nap its a relief to get a nap when I can. I can't imagine I'll get a chance to take naps once our second one is born, but one can dream, right?
I love your videos!!! 🤩 You’re the best RU-vid Mom I know!!! 👏🏻 This video is great! I was needing to hear this information because I have a 8 months old baby who just started crawling and a 4 year old boy who doesn’t want to share his toys with his brother because He's gonna suck them! 😂 Please do more videos about siblings!!! Thank you for sharing your ideas and experience!!! 🤗
I love all of your videos!!! My getting-in-the-car-system is very similar to yours (I know I'm 10 months late lol) except I put both of my girls in on the SAME side. Right now my girls are 4 and 3, but I've been doing this since they were 16 months and 0 lol. When my little was a baby, i would have her in her infant seat before heading out to the car (though this could still work if you don't use an infant seat for a baby). I would either put her car seat on the ground between my feet and pick up my toddler to put her in or i would just use one arm to hold the infant seat and the other arm to put my toddler in. To avoid my toddler from roaming around the car, i taught her pretty early how to click the chest buckle. She would get really excited to do it herself and then be stuck in the seat...win win lol. Now they're old enough to both buckle themselves in and I just have to make sure everything is tight.
Hey, I believe my kiddos will have the same age gap as yours. My son will be 23 months when his little brother comes. So here I am, watching your videos!
Ashley thanks for sharing this. I'm waiting for my 2nd baby so I know now what awaits for me lol. Would be nice if you can talk about that conflict resolution I'm not sure if you have already a video as I'm watching this and was 1 year ago. I'm also a new mom with the first so knowing this imaginary stage wow makes me be hesitant haha. Thanks!
Thank you for this. 23 weeks pregnant now. I am having the "mom guilt" ever since we knew about the pregnancy. Our babies will be 2years apart and I am a working mom. We do plan for 2 babies. It just came too early. We found out we are expecting 2 weeks after we discussed having another baby. 😅
