Ren - Diazepam (Official Visualizer) 

Diazepam is out now on all major streaming platforms smarturl.it/RenDemosVol2 Oh my my my I seem to feel so much better when it kicks in, chemical kitchen Feel my brain destruct Oh die, die, diazepam you turn the volume down on my demons and you give me relief just for a second and you make it all so numb Oh why, why, diazepam do you make me feel like every things not dissolving? Spinning doors are revolving Swallow a tablet I’m over indulging I’ve tried, tried diazepam to be the optimist and resist cards folding You’re the crutch that I’m holding Don't want tomorrow ‘cause right now I’m golden Oh die, die diazepam Done lie, lie diazepam Oh my, my, my, my When you leave why can’t I breathe like you’ve stolen My very essence my coding Went for a swim and then drowned in your ocean Don't lie lie diazepam you Promised me the world but now I’m rotting and moulding and my face it feels swollen Anaesthetic I block that emotion Synaesthetic dreaming I’m carried away Anaesthetic bleeding; a place for the pain self destructive healing its one and the same Oh, die, die diazepam Synaesthetic dreaming I’m carried away Anaesthetic bleeding; a place for the pain self destructive healing its one and the same Oh why, why diazepam

Everybody sleeps differently. I sleep on my side, my non-existent boyfriend sleeps on his stomach, my cat sleeps on his back but The Whole World Sleeps On Ren's Amazing Music!

Did u guys hear the part from 0:00 to 3:30, that part was amazing

Everywhere I dig with Ren's catalog, I find gold. He is so ridiculously talented that other music today is no longer tolerable. Go get it Ren, it's your time now.

Ren is what the world needs. It just doesn't know yet.

His voice has so much power, he is really an incredible artist

Me showing your songs to my friends like a proud mom: 🥺🥺❤❤🥺❤🥺🇧🇷

Ren will live as a legend for those who found him.

I'm on diazepam for terminal leukaemia. I can't listen to this without tearing up. How can some capture the essence of a tablet and it'd effects in a song like this just blows my mind

It's not at all hyperbole to say that if Ren continues this trajectory he will be among the best artists of this generation.

Just discovered this Ren song today. Never heard a song before that, for me, is so fucking personal. I have been addicted, physically, mentally etcetera for 30-some years because of a string of over-enthusiastic doctors who could not find another single medicine that could begin to help my specific afflictions, many years ago. I am agoraphobic now. I haven't really left my house in more years than I even want to admit. I literally cannot function without benzodiazepines. However, the days of those easy prescriptions are long long past. So, my loved ones must descend into dangerous places and situations on the regular in order to avoid my withdrawals. The first day is very bad. The second day, I begin to slip, unwillingly, in and out of my own body. The third day is when the seizures begin. The third day, if I am here at all, I am a ghost with no power to do anything but watch the mayhem as if on a screen. I have almost set my house on fire attempting to make soup. I have called someone I didn't know well, told him I had been kidnapped by my husband. He showed up at our place with three big friends to 'rescue' me. I had no memory of this call. I was surprised and pleased to see him. My husband was trying to explain that this was a difficult situation and not one they would easily understand. As they were discussing this, I apparently removed my pants and shoes and walked out into very busy traffic, smiling all the while. At one point, I went to my mother's after miscalculating my medication. I was entirely crocked. My family started looking up interventions for disrupting addiction to these medications. Surprise surprise, no one ever mentioned it again. When done correctly, it can take up to two years to withdraw, however, when one rushes it, they risk instigating PAWS (post acute withdrawal syndrome), which can take up to four years to recover from. And all of the above estimates are for people who have no true underlying panic disorder. Maybe taking these drugs solely for recreational use. I reassure myself that I will be free one day, when I am dead. Because I can't recall anything. I have the most profound memory loss. Every day seems dreamlike. Especially now, when many or most of the medicines we are able to acquire are actually 'pressies'. Pressies are made in homes and biker clubs and Mexico and China. They contain fentanyl a lot. They contain many mystery or experimental research chemicals. For almost a year, I had to take Ambien. It was literally all we could find. I don't remember any of it. You're really not supposed to take Ambien and stay awake. I don't know if Ambien is even a benzodiazepine, but because these were pressies, they contained something that prevented the withdrawals at least. The other thing about medicine made by inexpert people without the correct equipment, is hot spots and not spots. I'll let you surmise what that means. I doubt anyone has taken the time to read this. But if you have, just for god's sake and your own, be careful whose advice you follow. Just because they have an M.D. does not make them any smarter than you are about your own body.

I do not care what anyone in this world says. This man is poet, so cliché but this music never changed my life but allowed me to feel seen and put words to the feelings. Love you, Ren, Thank you, man x

It’s honestly crazy how EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. he manages to come out with a better tune. I always think “there’s no way he can do better than this” and he ALWAYS proves me wrong. Keep it up dude. Love from Sweden!

What is going on?!?!? ... Never heard of Ren until I stumbled upon him yesterday and now I just can't stop listening to all his music.. Ren if you read this I swear we have shared same experiences .. your music is sooo relatable 💯

so theres been a road of epiphany ever since i stumbled on hi ren a few weeks ago... come to the realization my childhood diagnoses of depression and social anxiety are actually symptoms of my adhd, waiting on the dr now.... might have to go private route to expedite. saddens and enrages me that it took me to 45 years, turns out im not an asshole im just a burnt out mid aged nondiagnosed warrior... i dont know you, but i love you. thank you.... every thing makes sense now every little fckn thing in every fckn way.

Am so freaking glad to got to witness this amazing artist thank you god am finally living a sober life off drugs finally at 53 years old and living my life to the fullest and staying humble and kind no matter what thank you Ren let’s spread his message out to everyone ❤❤❤

His music is unequivocally perfect for every little thing he does with his style. Ren has literally formed a new genre for his music and is going to shape a generation once everyone sees the true power of his talent

struggling with 150mg/day diazepam addiction and detox now for a week... its insanely relatable and brings tears to my eyes everytime i listen to this

i am a 60 year old music lover of all kinds not a big fan of rap that being said discovering ren on line has been a moving experience a genius a true artist and a poet just freaking amazing i have never been so moved by a few songs in all my life

This guy has the whole package. He can sing, he can write, he can rap and also he can play the guitar. And yet he seems so down to earth. Hopefully he never gives up.

I JUST GOT TURNED ON TO REN TODAY AND I AM OH MY GOD I CAN'T EVEN WRAP MY HEAD AROUND THIS GUY F****** AMAZING

Telling everyone I can about your genius..

F the bs reaction videos. This is for real. The pain is real. Being lost in doctors prescriptions is a terrible thing. I know, I'm living it every day

This absolute LEGEND has done more for my mental health since i stumbled upon him a year ago, than multiple psychiatrists, psychologists, counsellors, medication blah de blah de blah has done for me for the last 25 years. Unheard, cheated, misdiagnosis , the list goes on. . . 'Professionals' need to listen to you. You have single handedly helped me view my 'conditions' ( there's been a few!) differently and gave me the courage to scream and shout until i got the help i desperately need. For that, i thank you. Keep doing what you are doing. Superstar ⭐

Ah seriously, stop now. It's been 48hrs now and I'm still discovering more amazing music from you. Give it a rest will ya, I've got my life to live too!

The name got my attention

I'm completely obsessed with this song rn. Such melancholic nostalgia, it kills me! What's the word?....Suadade! Ren you're a genius gdi

I feel like this is perfectly saying "let's treat the symptoms, not the problem"

I lived a real life purgatory for three years because of these little blue pills. Hell on earth, and inside my head, no exaggeration. Found your music a day ago - you’re the one. Be blessed.

Already know its gonna be a banger

"My very essence, my coding. Went for a swim and I drowned in your ocean." Love it!!

Earworm!!!!!!! I can’t get it it out of my brain!

Personally I think it's amazing that you are writing/making music regarding medicine that is frequently prescribed and mental illness struggles...So many of us have been there but often feel shameful about our experiences. You Ren have shone the light on all our dirty secrets and we love you for it... The world is listening🎼❤️

I'm a bit older now, my brother is four years younger than me, sister 1 year older. Our parents divorced when I was 13. Dad went downhill shortly after with failed relationships and whatnot. Then it was pshychiatrists and pills (anti-depressants, sleeping pills, valium, dexamphetamine etc.) for him, along with copious amounts of alchohol. Me and my brother lived through the worst of it, Ren outlines a part of it in Sick Boi. It made a big blow on me and him. Sis was with mum. It took a long time for me to understand the condition. The hardest part is constantly explaining to extended family. I feel like they think I'm cold about it, but I've dealt with it for so long that I'm done explaining how to deal, and that you just have to enjoy to good times and endure the bad. Sis didn't get to evolve with it and they had a falling out which hasn't been resolved. He's off the piss now, completely. Huge step, some 20 years later, never too late though.

When I was 25-ish, I went to the doctor hoping I'll be sent to therapy or get some advice on my insomnia. I was prescribed a horse dose of diazepam. A random guy in the waiting room warned me he's back because those meds made his insomnia worse, and I got angry. I fixed the insomnia myself, tackling my anxiety on my own, out of spite. I kept the unused prescription as a reminder that I can do amazing s*it. 😉

Thank God someone finally came along & started singing love songs to drugs with their full chest. 🙂

"dont want tomorrow cuz right now Im golden" hits my sweet spot

I was addicted to this for 11 years due to GAD and serious panic attacks and was the hardest thing to come off… I can relate to this made me cry

You are amazing my new friend you have reached the heights of Rodger Waters with your guitar work. I am a 52-year-old from Australia and you have touched my heart with your words and music. ❤️

"Self destructive healing is one in the same". .. sums up the song and Ren,'s perspectives of the health care system.

ironic because seems every feels the same way but it's like Ren and the music was tailored for my life. All of it, the deep emotional stuff and the upbeat rap, it's mad

Ren changed my outlook on life, straight up.. things are just different now for the better

I had an online relationship with a man that lived in Amlwch, Isle of Anglesey... he died in early 2022. He had a serious addiction to benzodiazapines & I only found out how sick he was after he died. This song hit hard 💙

This might be the weed talking but this song put me in a hypnotic trance a few minutes ago. I swear to god my soul left my body for a second.

So calming

This one hits, right in the feels.

Ur voice wtf it's unbelievably beautiful

Keep coming back to this tune. Still remember you playing it to me on your computer before you dropped it. Timeless painful beautiful truth in every word. I felt it. Lush animation too, before you were proper famous. Kudos to this artist.

One of my REN all time faves. ❤

Beautiful song, Having been addicted to benzo's for three years, becoming homeless and now clean for 6 months after going cold turkey (not recommended going cold turkey, the nightmares + general fear were insane) I can finally say i'm doing great, i'm renting a place, got an IT degree, and starting a new job. I believe that you can too.

I'm 14 I was prescribed diazepam first when I was 12 I think. I told CAMHS not to put me back on it because I have a history with addiction they didn't listen and put me on it with out consent when I was suicidal and now I'm fully addicted to it again I don't know what to do honestly . Ren this is an amazing song you talk about things that no one else does and it true helps so many

My new favorite song.

Rens one of those artists where u can just feel his music in ur soul

From someone in recovery from multiple drug addictions, multiple prescription drug addictions, alcohol, smoking, multiple suicide attempts, self harm and mental health.. this hits in many different ways 💙

Fortunately, this song is unrelatable to me. I do love it anyways… I feel like my eyes are opened to a world of people who struggle around me, and I strive to be more aware. Thank you.

I'm so fuckn glad my brother decided to click on "Hi Ren" last week....i hope he doesn't get too big of a head from everyone telling him how good he is.....there is no word for how good he is

I had an instant connection with this song. Because of the way you wrote this i was able to explain my mother how i felt. But also tell my therapist i wanted to quit this mediaction. It was hard but i did it. I thank you very much. Because your lyrics give me the right words to express myself without being unintentionally harsh or rude.

I'm in awe of who you are and what you do. 'Hi ren' and the tales trilogy blew me away! For the future I'd love to hear something centred around a female character with mental health issues. Not sure how it would work since your stories can sometimes relate to yourself and your experiences. But anyway.... You're one in seven billion. Please keep up with your magnificent art, take care of yourself and know you've engaged me so much through your words. Much love and respect - Danielle xx

I'm almost 50 and here I am on a Sunday morning just soaking up the sun and Ren's beautiful music I wish him health and long happy life!

Every dictionary should have Ren’s picture beside the definition of what a real artist is 👨🏻‍🎤🗣💬🎙🎶🔊💯💥🔥🤴🏻🙌👏🙏❤️

Blasted this on my headphones walking around, engrossed in the music and detached from life, I imagine it's a similar feeling to diazepam. Also, Ren hitting the synths making an artificial sound to convey an artificial feeling is nuts.

ngl, as a recovering (diazepam) addict, this song hits different

All Ren's work is incredible. My wife said "He just doesn't make a bad song". The guitar double stops on this are sublime and the solo is perfect with a beautiful tone. The vocals are so powerful and his range is phenomenal. Thank you Ren for all healing music you have given us. It's a great time to be alive.

One of those rare songs I can listen to on repeat and let the world just fade away.

Clean from vallium and Xanax now for a yr. 5 yr addiction from 19-24 started with 10mg a day endid up on 150mg-250mg had a fit when went cold turnkey. Stuff is bad news

I’m just so glad that you are repping us all. with mental illnesses. For years we were just stuffed under the rug or drugged up. Respect 🔥🤘🏻❤️

So sad I hadn't discovered you when you first started putting out music. To think I could have had all of this incredible art to listen to all these years. I started with HI Ren, sick boi, and jenny/screech/violet like everyone else and have listed to all of them... so many times now... but going deeper, I have been listening to 1 masterpiece after another no matter the style. Not a miss yet. Thank you. Thank you for putting all of this into the world. And, if you happen to read this, from one autoimmune patient to another, more importantly from one human trying to find their way in this life, I sincerely wish you the utmost success with your treatment and a life of physical wellness and inner peace.

I love how the instruments are muted while the vocals are sharp, almost overly so, on purpose. That effect really gives off the vibe of being on heavy opiates.

I just found this. I know this stuff dissolves a life into a dull existence. The music and your vocals are golden.

One of the best artists I've ever met. Guys talent has always been untouchable, literally a different class ! ✌

Very relatable, 6 years now on diazepam.. tapering off. I want my personality back and for this numbness to go away. Been hiding behind it, blocking my emotions for way too long now.. This song is one of my many favourites! Nat, Australia (originally UK...) thanks Ren

I’m old enough to recognize that old school vibe

I am deep in the rabbit hole right now. I don't want to come out, this art/poetry/rapping is just amazing. I don't have the words to explain how it makes me feel. I feel connected to amazing people on Patreon and on YT, and it's solely because of Ren's music. Thank you Ren! 🖤

This song needs 1B views!!

I have to keep repeating myself with every song I hear from REN connection soul soup feeds the mind and heart - totally sated but keep going back for more and more - REN is on another level - Im in my 60s and it never ceases to amaze me how this artist has just appeared like a magician on the world stage of life to give us all peace of mind

I just found Ren what a shot of fresh air.

Omg i cant believe this came out 3 years ago! Deffo one of my favourites ❤

This song sings my medicated life. I hit rock bottom and got trapped in a place I couldn't see a way out of. I thought I had done so much wrong in the world there was no way back for me. Guilt, regret, self blame, Grief, hate, resentment and on and on kept me in hell and pushed me further in every day. The medication helped me forget and ignore my problems but prevented me from dealing with them. This song is so true in it's story. Medication was my crutch and I held on to it tightly for 9.5 years. Medication allowed me to get out of bed, it allowed me to stop crying and to talk to family. FLIP side if used for long enough Medication will make you forget who you are and why you should be better. Mental health Medication is a must for a lot of people like me but it isn't a fix, it's a helping hand to a better place. I eventually found a true place to be settled in and I found it with Psilocybin. Everyone look it up. Ren I'm sorry for bullshiting about myself but your music is just to relatable

I've met Ren today in his music. Almost kept scrolling and then , And then I stopped and 6 videos later, I'm still here.

I literally have a playlist dedicated to Ren, love your music man

But my music is really connecting and the people who find it respect it You got that right 💯♥️

Again a very impressing song. I lost my husband and my father while they tried to overcome their diazepam- addiction. They both comitted suicide because of the panic attacs snd the depression which comes with withdrawl. Please everyone on diazepam: If you want to get off it, dose down in VERY (!) small steps. Wait after the first until it's ok, then the next small step... And to all the others: Hands off.

This was the first Ren song I heard and is still my favorite

Back again-i'm a 71yr old sic puppy-i love chillin' with this song so much, even tho i had to go to rehab 40 yrs ago to get off valium. when detox got messy, i was attached to a pole, there were drains in the tile floor and there were water hoses involved. you get the picture. but what is sick, i'm remembering how it felt to be "golden". no worries, tho. i got other drugs to finally quit, not picking up any more.

So much talent! He has real gifts. Even my kids love Ren

Ren is a high on my list of priority gigs to see live once this corona shit is gone. Can't wait to see hear more from you Ren, Vinyl when? :)

You perfectly captured the feeling of when it kicks in, and it starts relieving your anxiety in the "ah - e - ah - e - ih ah - e - ah - e - i" part that's sang in an ethereal heavenly way. You captured the flipside also, where if taken too long and/or too often, it loses the relieving effect and just numbs you instead. It's good temporarily and taken not often, but beyond that, it's downwards you go. At that point, it subdues your thoughts and emotions, so you can never do the work you NEED to do on yourself. All Benzodiazipines included!

Floating........ Regulating myself. Infinite thanks to your profound musical, creative self!!! So grateful for Ren. Needed him.

My mum was prescribed diazepam for more than 10 years when I was a child, took her over 2 years of cutting up her pills and having smaller and smaller doses to wean her self off. Was talking one day to someone about my experience and they said 'mum was at home but nobodies in' kinda summed it up for me. This isn't just about individuals these drugs impact the whole family, I guess on the positive my experience made me question the health system and I always research and make my own informed choices, consequently I've been able to avoid a lot of pharma. and choose more natural solutions.

I'm glad I was here before ren hit 1 million.

My sister listens to all your songs she was gonna buy your merch but she sadly passed away 2 months ago she introduced me to your music keep it up bro you got this I'm gonna save up some money an buy your merch!!

Working my way through your catalogue. All gems so far, not a scrap of filler anywhere. Each song stands on its own merits, when you chain them together with little links I end up in emotional overload and have to time out to cool my heart. You're a Wizard, Ren.

Thank you Ren. I just stumbled across this vid. I'm a huge benzo addict but been clean for 1,5 months now. This song helped me even more! Legend🔥 everyone dealing with addiction, stay strong, it will get better. Trust!👊

Discovering this is like when kids heard Pink Floyd for the first time back in the day no other music gives me this.

Before I heard this, I almost went to the doctor to fill this script... thank you for helping me to stop and decide to keep going unmedicated!

2023 was a monster year for Ren. Let's make 2024 even bigger.

The chorus sounds like how Diazepam makes you feel especially those reverb falsetto group vocals. Plus the visuals of being surrounded in warm gold. Absolutely brilliant Ren. Love from Scotland xxx

Came accross Hi Ren a few days ago. Been binge watching Ren and The Big Push videos since then, lost track of time tbh but who cares, this guy is something special. Massive fan now, so amazing to find someone with such raw passion for music and storytelling, a modern day bard.

Just found your songs, and thank you for that!! When I was 20 I was the 6th person in Canada to be diagnosed with a rare Sarcoma in my spine, needless to say, I’m now in a wheelchair! I’ve been on diazepam for almost 20 years now, and I just wanted you to know how much I relate and respect your music! It really resonates and I appreciate everything you do!!!

This text. That voice. This flow. That emotion. I love it ❤️ Greetings from Germany ✌️🥶