Rewiring the Anxious Brain: Neuroplasticity and the Anxiety Cycle: Anxiety Skills #21 

Awesome, thanks!

Food and no food has the secret to all anxiety and mental issues. Your putting chemicals in your body you have no idea. Yes keto and fasting is great. Eat clean organic food that won't poison you.

On doing Keto did anyone have any problems with Kidney stones or Gallbladder stones?

Apple cider vinegar or lemon in your water.

Been taking A.C.V & also Lemon juice as I've got a history of Kidney Stones

Fr, a doctor told me this strategy and it didn't fix my thinking about things that make me anxious, but it fully beat panic attacks for me. I rarely get them anymore(it's been around 6 years) and if I do have one it lasts for like 10 seconds and I don't react to it other than thinking that this is just a panic attack and I'm not gonna give it attention. I get like 1 a year now. Definitely fixed it.

For me, it was this and working as a cashier. I believe it was exposure therapy. I made myself do the anxious thing every day until it stopped bothering me

I'm working on one month since having one still get anxious alot tho meds are helping congrats

@@dxrkknxghts it helps a lot with anxiety disorders especially, but not as much with more specific phobias/anxieties. If it's more specific, then there needs to be gradual exposure to that thing, to demonstrate to the mind that it's safe and ok.

@@subzoronltd7779 Yeah definitely. Exposure is a huge thing. Mine is a specific anxiety and exposure to it along with this panic attack strategy has helped me along so much.

I kno right 🤤

Lol

Learned

The brain named itself too 🤔

Lol

I have irrational fear of slow death/human loss and guys.

What about a roller coaster 😂

@@nylakhan5658 I tried that once, never again! 🤣🤣🤣

@@zildian1983 I suffer from anxiety I would really like to speak to someone as it affects my daily life.

@@nylakhan5658 what are your fears?

A lot of people have testified about this and I really want to give it a shot. I put so much on my plate and it definitely affects my stress and anxiety levels

The Trips I've been having have really helped me a lot,I finally feel in control of my emotions and my future and things that used to be mundane to me now seem incredible and full of nuance on top of that I'm way less driven by my ego and I have alot more empathy as well

Shrooms was the best trip I had. It was an amazing experience.

Dr.spores is the best, he's been my supplier for anything psychedelics.

Be careful with the scammers in these comments. Do not buy anything from them or the ones they recommend on Instagram.

U are right

Thank you.

my anxiety isn't like that, I have emetophobia soooo it happens when anxious thoughts come into my head

thanks..it helped..really thank you so much

@@ameliaelizaax2895 me too,well the part about anxious thoughts.There is hope for us yet!Hugs.🤗

Yeah you are so right

@@suriyasuriya-bz9ev i would say to fully accept the thoughts because that way they go away. What we resist persists

I love this x

@@shannane5171&

In other words, Give Yourself a Break. I like what you said about anxiety and excitement. My son who had crippling anxiety did this same thing and he’s working and has his own place.

Please pray I can stay sober. If I relapse again I may die. Last year I went three months sober. This year 2 months then slipped up. Never been a daily user. It’s alway once a week I break. I know what I have to do please say a little prayer for me thank you

@@ThankyouJesus81 May The Grace Of Jesus Christ The Love Of Our Heavenly Father And The Fellowship Of The Holy Ghost Be With You And Your Family Forever Brother 🙏🏼

Good for you I had that issue too

Do you remember how hard it was to be able to feel something uncomfortable without opiates?

🙏

I m there with you. It s so hard but I can t see any other way.

Im 24 too, it hit all at once, it’s horrible. The despair, the hopelessness, the regrets, the guilt, honestly I want out sooo bad. But I can’t. Will life ever get better

@@markcannon8522 life will get better.

To everyone here esp those in deep despair now...praying to Jesus and feeding on his verses from the Bible can strengthen you each day. Call on him. He will never leave you nor forsake you. God bless you all

Just be mindfull not identifying yourself with what the thought says , youre not what the though says youre going to be , cut the link, pratice not following the thought ,mindfully, youre welcome guys

How can I use exposure therapy and face the fear if by law they have made us not allowed to see people because of this corona virus going around, any other techniques?

@@djmurcs face the fear of hunger. Fast. Face the fear of isolation, dread and illness. Its just how you choose to view it.

@@djmurcs depends on the fear/anxiety. If its social, deconstruct what you really fear and establish the worst parts. If you fear others watching you, you could post videos on social media. Before doing so, you could set out some hypotheses of what you think will happen. Afterwards, you could sit down and evaluate what actually happened. Did what you fear actually happen? Etc. You could do this with other things too, if you fear looking sillyor embarrassed you could build up to posting silly posts online. These are some really simple ideas that may work online given the current circumstances. Hope this helps.

Ryan A yes

OH yes! very much so!

Anxiety creates avoidance too lol, it’s a paradox until you have a good mindset and take courage

@@icarus7552 Oh yes. Like depression and isolation and loneliness, which then leads to more depression, etc... it's a spiral going downward unless you can pull yourself out.

S W Like a rabbit hole lol, yeah it’s really awful

So true. Like feeding a monster. The more I pay attention to it, the more real it feels in my brain.

i relate to this comment so much.....i have gotten so much intrusive thoughts bc I’m always home and my mind wanders when I’m not doing anything...

How you doing

Are u better?

@@tonjo575 well I’ve been to therapy and been working out and meditating. I’m making progress but some days are harder than others. I’m beginning to not fight with my inner thoughts as much and just learning how to breathe better too. Its a mental battle everyday but slowly i will get there :)

@@m0thmuse good job You got this :)

Are you suffering in anxiety like me

I need you to help me about my worry. For example: I always get afraid of loosing money in stock market and get anxious I will loose all my money. I always feel once I recovered my money I will be cool. Until I recover I live in anxious period. How can you advise

Past and future are merely a construction made up by humans. The only thing that really exists is this very moment and one should always try to experience it fully and conciously feel it.

@@factviews8474 stop worshipping money

@@factviews8474 - Is it really necessary to play the stock market? Your life is worth so much more than the things of this world. I think relationships are a major component to anxiety and happiness. Especially a relationship with the One. 🙏🏻

God Bless, protect, aid anyone going through anxiety 🙏❤️

Maybe freezing water calms the mind because the mind is distracted and focusing on the discomfort. Thanks for sharing this!

That’s awesome . Thank you so much for sharing. I’ve studiesd wim hoff . I’m happy for you .

Thanks for sharing

What the.....?

The cold water activates the vagus nerve. Check it out for yourselves

callmehina it’s okay forgive yourself and work through your anxiety

Anxiety will be with you until you become calm

I'd get checked out you may need medication

I think that isn't important for anxiety. Just because someones life is "good" and save it doesn't mean that you can't get mental health issues. The brain is too complicated for that logic xD

There might even be things you haven't processed/things your subconscious isn't okay with that you haven't realized yet. It's okay your feelings are valid and you can get through it. The only way out is through so just keep swimming :)

Leonard, you are not alone. This used to be my life, now I'm a therapist, thanks to good therapists. There is good help and much hope. Reach out and Hang in there!!

I feel you :(

Isn't this the most backasswards way of being. This is me in a nutshell. I am deathly afraid of being alone. But i don't want to be around anyone when i have high anxiety moments.

I get it

I feel you

Thanks for sharing! Makes my current experiences (overwhelm etc) feel less lonely

True

Agreed 👍

indeed, its a gift

Yes

Sad but true

Thank you for that. :)

If you liked this video, you may also want to check about this video about which nutrient deficiencies can cause anxiety! Hope it's helpful! ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-GjeEG_B2eiE.html

This works. Many years ago a counselor told me when I’m having a panic attack say “bring it on”. Eventually I just started saying “fuck it I don’t care anymore” and it would make it stop. That that worked for years. Now I have developed severe OCD after a prolonged traumatic event and I can’t seem to get a grip on the anxiety/panic anymore, but for many years saying “fuck it” really did work.

I was at the store I had anxiety attack and I told my mom I gotta get outta here but then I thought "actually no" and then it stopped lol

@@soulplexis ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-ZSm6dzoSsxk.html Check this to video this technique of meditation brings back the balance emotionally ,physically, spiritually..As well as You awaken your dormant energy

*snap* nice

I'm going to try this tonight!

Lol

You are

That’s how programming starts.

I known.. but the anxiety is real we have at least respect it cause it can happen to any one. I have it for 2 year ready .. guess what.! Now the anxiety create my apnea so when I have Apena attacked The Apena sent a electric signal a shock signal to the heart, Hurting my heart badly 💔.. thk to God 🙏 you not suffer of this. TKS..

@@thomaslevy9985 hope you will get better soon

Thank u

This is too annoying,I have had minor ocd when i was more younger but It started around 1.5 years back. I was having fear that if i don't do this something bad will happen to family members or something bad will happen in general. Then it was number based theme, i mean i had thoughts to do things for a particular number of times and it was so annoying. Then since last few months some other things came like checking windows of room again and again that someone is not looking at me. And recently due to a fear that someone has tried to do something bad to me a thought again and again comes that something is coming from back some bad energy or something and I have to fight it and change my thought and it exhausts a lot, takes a lot of time and disturbs focus Can you please help in how to fight this and remove it.

Emma’s videos are pretty awesome. Gives me more answers to the WHY’s. Glad google pointed me towards her videos.

How?

@@Julia-mq1zp just relax your eyes, like you were about to sleep. It works for me-)

Proof God exists: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-QaY5Vv-bvl4.html

@@Julia-mq1zp proof God exists: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-QaY5Vv-bvl4.html

@@Julia-mq1zp how God wants us to dress and look outwardly: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-Zfy5vGMygtc.html

He man what is cbt?

@@ricoevangelista170 Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

Currently doing all these. My psychologist said that I should celebrate my progress no matter how small they are. But there's this fear that I might go back from the start, it's like a fear over a fear...

My symptoms are same as yours, your comment calmed me a bit🙏

Thanks for sharing this

Nah, that´s not the way. It tells you a person who has done it all his days and he also keeps feeling really bad. The change passes by other way.

@@franciscogonzalezlorenzo2474 which is?

@@Shreddios idk, last days i am thinking by finding its origin, but maybe there is no a solution and we have to live better we can with this

Hope you are doing well with that good luck

Hey TypicalNora, how are you doing?

@@swirlingfudge hey, i’m feeling pretty much the same as when i posted this comment. my social anxiety is still pretty bad but im still working on it and hopefully getting a bit better slowly. thank you for asking

@@Lalabooey hello. What are u doing to help urself? Are u following a routine of sleep diet dressing well and exercise? Socializing is anyway difficult these days, how are u coping?

@@Lalabooey do you have anything that u r conscious about urself? Any physical feature? Any past trauma(fear of rejection, isolation, abandonment)? Or have u faced it everm

Polyvagal Therapy: e.g. Stanley Rosenberg, Deb Dana, Stephen W. Porges, Peter A. Levine

Europe Zacbol …

@Europe Zacbol She has a lot of videos on different grounding exercises. Try and see what works for you. If nothing helps, you could try meds.

If you're interested in practical solutions, you may want to know that certain nutrient deficiencies can cause anxiety! Medications such as birth control can deplete magnesium and vitamin B6, both of which can lead to anxiety. Vitamin D deficiency can also cause anxiety! For vitamin D deficiency, you may want to plan a location in a sunny place, buy a sun lamp, or supplement with 2000 IU/d in the winter! Just make sure to check with your healthcare provider before beginning any supplements!

Proof God exists: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-QaY5Vv-bvl4.html

Kayli G I use to assume situations would go terrible. The. One day I asked myself “what if it goes extremely well” I didn’t know so I had to go and try but the idea of it possibly going amazingly was motivating

I practiced all three steps when I was trying to get better. One year later, I only came out even more crippled, with PTSD.

@@mina0rahman have you heard if Dianetics? I know it's associated with Scientology and a lot of people she away from that, but Dianetics itself is essentially what she described here, but in more detail. I go to therapy and my therapist practically echoed what is said in this video and videos I've seen on Dianetics.

@@mina0rahman I hope you find a good counselor or something that helps and can feel better soon. Learning to meditate helped me a lot. And Jordan Peterson videos.

@@alegriart Yes, those who seriously injured me then lied & denied & covered-up after (doctors & their legal teams) traumatised me repeatedly & knowingly: torture & malice, I could've died but they didn't care, they only cared about themselves.

Eating a diet as free of chemicals as possible helps, too!

@@outdoorgal9602 so just eat nothing haha? everything is a chemical. literally everything

Jessica Burchell very true. Don’t forget K2 along Vitamin D protocol. It’s changed my life.

Jessica Burchell magnesium is key, nuts are good. Try Deez

@@anthonyramirez2576 I see what you did there haha

i use them but they still scare me and i'm always tense. elevator-vertigo combo :) worse the higher the floor. but there's no way i'm taking stairs to the 10th floor either. my luck is having to go to a high floor is very rare. and those glass elevators.. like hell i'm looking through. One day i'll have to go on a glass floor elevator to a reeeally high building and my soul will escape my body but i'll do it hahah

TenTonKoala same thing happened with me👍🏽

My friend got stuck in the elevator 7 times. I would NEVER take elevator with him, the chance we get stuck is high 😄😄And anyway he is scared of taking elevator till now, and also airplanes.

I'm doing Ketamine now

Do you have to keep taking it?

@user-fn6lo1in4p No. Once can be enough. Watch Roland R Griffiths talk on this platform about his incredible research at Johns Hopkins. He is a Neuropsychopharmacologist who has had uniquely successful results with treatment resistant depressives..Not same thing but naturally there's a considerable overlap with anxiety and panic.

Taking mushrooms is what triggered my chronic anxiety 17 years ago. I was already prone to panic attacks but now I’ve had ongoing 24/7 anxiety with derealization since 2005. 🤷🏼‍♀️

@@shaeli54 I’m sorry to hear this 😢 have you found anything that has helped ease your anxiety ?

That’s me I be like “okay my music career is making me stress” or “no having anxiety at work makes me stress” or “my court dates are making me stress” but I think it’s the overall anxiety just being present in my life that’s making me stress”

Sounds very familiar! I bet so many people have had anxiety since a child and spread to other thought processes that it encompasses a large portion of their adult life!

This is how you can find out what's "causing" the anxiety ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-17fncVgHua4.html

Author Joyce Meyer

No it was Susan forward

@@lifeann30 Do it Afraid

It's by Susan Jeffers. And it is garbage.

Barbie latina same I cannot drive

My 22 year old son had so much anxiety when driving he quit 4 years ago.

Liz R at least he tried but I cannot drive for more than 10 minutes 😩😩😩

😔

you got this. you can do it!

How are you feeling now?

Mental heath should be a subject in schools. At all levels to varying degrees. Maybe if children were given the knowledge upfront they could avoid some of the damaging behaviors that lead to anxiety later in life. Knowing what resources are available is paramount in schools too.

@@deannailiano4132 you right

You can do it!!!

that is so true.. it occurs from past experiences and becomes anxiety because you think it may happen again. Working with your how it all happened and resolve it will bring forth relief and decrease ypur anxiety

facing you fear and finding out the root cause will help you find relief

Overcome kr lyee??

Have u applied this? How are u doing now?

@@edithzamora2220 I am indeed slowly improving. The breakthroughs are.. sparradic lol 😅 but indeed it works.

Yes, she seems to be talking about simple anxiety here. What about super OCD,, your brain talking every second, with a hyperventilation type state where cortisol takes over your brain!?

Rare One... I feel your comment

😭

Being stuck in it isnt a good idea. Its best we learn to turn it on and off depending on the situation we find ourselves in.

Dr. Peter Levine offers a way through fight/flight/freeze mode by using the Somatic Experiencing approach as treatment for CPTSD/PTSD. There are loads of video on YT to view and there are many certified practitioners using this approach in clinical therapy in every city in North America. It is a very beneficial treatment primarily because it is non-invasive as it works with the nervous system to release physiological energy using primal body mechanics. Fascinating and highly effective. Do check it out, it truly is a game changer. ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-nmJDkzDMllc.html

You’re not alone

Wow! Thanks :) It's always nice when someone takes the time to say something positive :)

@@TherapyinaNutshell I wanted to ask that when "I don't want to study" its becaz laziness sometimes and sometimes anxiety so how to handle that

@@TherapyinaNutshell I have to agree! IMHO it is not bound to the video format, but the way how you share your information. I notice how much "honest knowledge" (knowledge you tested out and not just taking it for granted) there is in your way of talking. This was very intriguing and now I have a bunch of information I can now put under test myself! Thank you for that!

Very true. Cognitive therapy is the only thing that will change chronic anxiety. I have dpdr and got rid of it once but it returned because I haven't stayed on top of my maintenance. This is a great video. When I think about the science of the brain and neuroplasticity, it gives me hope that I'll feel normal again. New subscriber to this wonderful gal.

@@TherapyinaNutshellt Iam watching it for first time i will do it later.I am a parkinson patient

Yep, our society is all mixed up about mental health and anxiety, they essentially encourage avoidance in the name of empathy, but it can be really harmful.

Its always so strange to me that through my life and learning (which has only been 26 years long, not a lot but I digress) the one thing that we think we are, which is our thoughts, turns out to be one thing that can cause the most grief and suffering. And then out of all things, the thing we often fear the most, which is absolute silence and an absence of thoughts, turns out to be the most peaceful, blissful experience in the world. The scientifically-minded part of me wonders if our brains and our minds are wired to convince us to reject the natural state of things, which is peace and silence, so that we can move, and think, and survive, rather than be still as the earth we were born from and return to. Its very poetic, and it's part of the reason that I take Bhuddist philosophy quite seriously.

@@paimon1250 I love this.

This is so true. Children live in the present. I only started getting anxious when I became an adult

Health problems conquered with these programs. Feel better, heal better no matter what you are dealing with. You DON'T have to get the BrainTap headset. Just use your own headset. Institute for Whole Body Wellness braintap.com/bundles/#a_aid=1907JOTU&a_bid=c26267b7

How did you conquer please share

That is wonderful! I too believe my mind healed itself after much hard work.

Health problems conquered with these programs. Feel better, heal better no matter what you are dealing with. You DON'T have to get the BrainTap headset. Just use your own headset. Institute for Whole Body Wellness braintap.com/bundles/#a_aid=1907JOTU&a_bid=c26267b7

Then theyre not ur friends

@Dilhara Pinnaduwage O.K.

Hope you find better kinder people Maybe join clubs like art or pottery classes where you meet new people

@@arunscience1394 thank you

Yes.

Heyy! How are you today? I developed extreme agoraphobia and anxiety in October and my life has been turned upside down ever since. I am optimistic most of the time and I am slowly exposing myself to... Well... The outside world. Hope you're doing better!

Love this comment I deal with crippling anxiety and depression and sometimes I just want to end my life because I feel like I am so broken and unfixable. I have a lot of trauma from various sources growing up and because of that I deal with these mental disorders. I often get hyper fixated on a situation or stressor that it is all I can think about. For example I hated presentations in school and anytime a teacher mentioned that word my heart rate would increase dramatically. I would dread presenting every day until it happened and it was very frustrating. I have never liked speaking in front of large groups and in being in large crowds in general. I get over stimulated and usually would try to escape those situations or avoid them at all costs. I pretended to be sick on the day of the presentation so I could get out of it but that only delayed the inevitable. Right now I find most of my stress/anxiety is from financial struggles. It gets so bad sometimes that I give myself migraines and stop eating much at all. It also makes it very difficult for my family/loved ones because my moods can swing from 0 to 100 in a split second. It often leaves me feeling like a burden too those around me which leads to the depression. I just want it to go away.

What do u tell urself now when u get a symptom?

@@saradevikam.508 when i have a flashback (memory or thoughts), i say to myself "it's okay" until "it's okay" becomes what i think about Remember to breathe when you say "it's okay", because it calms the body too. You can see this as befriending your thoughts, when they show up regardless of what it is, you can just accept them appearing and tell them it's okay :) you don't need to get into them nor entertain nor wrestle with them, just say "it's okay" until "it's okay" is all you think about ^^ When i have an emotional flashback (bodily emotionally overwhelmed, or physical symptoms like panic attack/fatigue/migraine) , i say to myself "I'm okay", or "it's okay I'm having a hard time, but so far i have survived 100% of such hard times, most of them were worse, so this is a piece of cake. It's okay :)" just anything factual and real that calms yourself and centers upon you being okay will be great to say~ Like if you once experienced being physically abused, and now you have a symptom, tell yourself you made it through the real deal, this remembrance/symptom in comparison is nothing but a piece of cake :) This technique is very important to me because my thoughts and feelings are stem from facts that i experienced in my reality for the longest time, and i need action from me to create a different life for me and my loved ones, so i need to stay bright and productive. When i was suffering a lot, couldn't even get out of bed, it was daunting, even self-care bodily didn't help me much because my brain was crippled. But now it's different because i am applying this to what cripples me most, and addressing what comes out from my brain with my brain power:) So, calming yourself is the most important for progressing into health. Some people use these soothing skills as defense mechanism or to enable denials, please don't fall into the trap. If something is actually wrong, it must be addressed. This is not about disregarding what's happening out there. This is about being a healthier version of you (a different reality than the messy one you have to deal with out there), so that you can create better and choose different options in life that is about being healthy and happy and productive. without your wellbeing first, it's impossible to create profound changes. So this is about being strong, clear, and capable of dealing with life issues from a healthy place :) Sometimes I'm worried people who are in abusive relationship or situation only use this to enable their misery so i have to put it here also. To be okay and to recover means being healthy enough to create a profound change in yourself/health, instead of to be stronger just to stay as a supply to problems and personal/relational miseries. I used to do that, i used to make myself "stronger" so i could still keep a relationship. But the truth is, the relationship was what weakened me. So i changed, and i got stronger just so i could keep my relationship with Me healthy. Meaning i had to say goodbye to people who didn't care about me even though i cared about them a lot. Practically, when i had to say no to an abusive relationship, to be healthy with me means i needed those healthy conditions to grant myself real safety first. So, my relationship with me is that i have to be healthy enough in my life that i can back myself up if someone threatens me using my factual weaknesses (financially physically mentally emotionally socially). My job is to strengthen those weaknesses so that i wouldn't be exploited by them anymore, nor be needy of any of it from someone else. This "it's okay" has solved the cognitive dissonance, gaslighting effects and other things being psychologically manipulated by others. So this soothing is the first step, the next step is to use the health and sanity you've gained to build a healthy relationship with yourself, with your unique life, to work on your goals, fitness, your "escape" from these bad situations. These all take energy and hard work! What i have found is, whatever i say to soothe me, must be regarding what i am experiencing, instead of externalising it to something outside my control. Let's say if you had a thought about a situation, maybe that situation isn't okay, maybe it's about someone else being abusive. All you need in this case, is to say to yourself that it's okay for you to think about such traumatic incident, it means you care and you don't want to create nor experience such things in your life. tell yourself that you're now okay, you can make changes, you're physically safe. You've made it through and you'll make it again. And Then, disengage with this person, even if not possible yet physically (same workplace/living place), you have to disengage with that person emotionally and mentally by using this "it's okay" technique inside your mind. It'd be hard at first but just be consistent, more consistent than anything else, then it will sink in. The most important thing about bringing yourself to feel okay is that you actually become okay by fact. And if you or someone you care about actually needs your help to change the situations, you will be able to do so :) never try to change someone else, change yourself and make it an eternal motto. If the thought of someone being abusive is something that's happening, and your body is feeling sick about it, you being weak in real time can do so little. So, when the thought comes up, it is being your best friend to tell you to create a positive change, so you must make sure you function at your optimum by being in the here and now, and then take positive actions to create wellbeing, or to end a bad situation from continuing. For instance, my friend told me that he has an addiction issue. I told him what actions he must take to stop it. I told him it's okay, i told him to take the steps to quit. But he kept himself in the addiction. I was frustrated. This time, I told myself it's okay, i tried all my best, and i have to stop interacting with him because he's using me as an enabler (if someone's addicted/has a problem and not taking active actions to change him/herself, all other things/people are nothing but enablers/supply). I used to make myself get healthy and keep helping him. But then i realised my approach was hopeless. Now i get healthy and then stopped being an enabler, i strive for my goals and my own happy life that is made of responsibility and trust with myself. If he doesn't want to be healthy, then we have to part ways. With an addict, there is no trust, no responsibility, no accountability. Just a chaos. And I wasn't able to see that until i got myself so sick and then healthier. You literally become addicted as a helper when you're with an addict. Same thing different form. So get out of there. So this is my lesson learned. Being healthy enough to create a healthy version of yourself, not so that you can bring anyone in (certainly not the addict), or chase someone else. It's not about any other person. it is to make yourself okay and healthy, and be the example for the addict or other people involved. All of these are personal work to do. Without this video, i was still in that toxic codependency cycle, because i was always trying harder to meet a wrong end. This is kinda in reverse because this all ends within me. And then i discovered my own tendencies just weren't working for me, and so i ended those patterns in myself also. It was very hard at first to stay in my own lane, because my brain was so used to those patterns. but i persisted because being the enabler was everything i wanted to get rid of. I don't want to be someone else's backup/something. I want to be my own self. so i kept going despite my habit of externalising my power. I hope you find this useful!! It's kind of repetitive but i figured that will help information sink in :) Many people are dealing with abusive situations nowadays so i incorporated that into this message just in case. :)