Ryan Lochte: I don’t speak to my mom 

You had to read between the lines and add the dots. Dad seemed like he was cheating on Mom, Mom had the kids turn on Dad, Dad remarried and now Ryan considers Stepmom the best Mom. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure this one out.

😂 class??? Look up Lochte in Brazil

@@jomc3 that was a long time ago

​@@sleepymage7165doesn't matter if it was a long time ago He still lied

@@dehende07did he? Specifically tell me what he lied about it? His problem unfortunately is that he’s an idiot. From what I see he’s a good guy though

Our moms are human, with all the faults, frailties, and confused feelings that come with that mortal state.

@@JordanPAT And humans apologize when they eff up and so should this person's mother. I think the bible went overboard with the 'honor my mother/father' stuff but didn't put in a contingency for when your parents are assholes. My mother in non-specific words said 'I get to treat you like crap but you have to honor your mother'. Yeah, NO.

I'm so sorry your mother never validated on what your feelings. It would brake my heart not to be able to speak to my children or grandchildren. I would apologize and validate their feeling, because I may not see it the they did/do, BUT that would not be a hill that I am prepared to die on. My children and grandchildren are everything to me. And why some parents can't see that, I just can't understand it.

@@moreofawave Try the Grey Rock method. It will help you gain control of the narcissist and prevent them from destroying your life.

@@JordanPAT Thanks, D. I am currently trying the "I blocked on my phone" method and that's working fine. :p Don't have another family reunion until Thanksgiving if she says anything I'm going to ask for an apology for the last time she treated me like shit and if she doesn't have one for me I'll just go back to the 'block' method. She has more to gain talking to me, than I do talking to her. Normally, I just let the shit she says/does to me go but I am not ok with that right now.

My mother - the gaslighter

And this comes from a therapist?

@@maxithebello read a book and learn about it....

When I went into counseling 20+ years ago, it was initially about a bad breakup. 2 sessions later, it turned into mom and dad. And that's when the floodgates opened.

So true and most addiction issues stem from parental neglect of children emotions

To each his own

I hear ya.

I know exactly what you mean, sometimes you have to walk away.

😔😪😥

You're describing my life pretty much. You gotta find love/support where you can. Sounds like you've done that🙂

This is how both my parents are, can't wait till I'm able to leave in two to three years. Waiting patiently.

She's your mother get over it

I had to teach my mom how to properly apologize and to this day I’m not even sure if it’s sincere.

It's funny how we hear that women apologize too much. I've seen the opposite, in my experience.

I hope u don't end up regretting this when u become a parent yourself and ur mom is no longer on this earth

It's also what you do when you have things burried deep down..

I agree, he didn't really want to automatically say the wrong thing, then regret it later, like many other people seem to do.

You're the expert in disfunction

Korey Paul YEP. & I know this. PeaCe&ReSPeCt, Shelley

100% growing up I feel the same way.

❤

Yo go girl! Kids are everything.

@@mattz8775 thanks! I’ve just always tried to look at life on the bright side. I am glad to say I’m blessed and I do well for myself. If you look at my life it’s a blessing I’m where I am today.

Bitch yes! That’s all you can do. Just care for your child love your child. Love your kid the way your parents didn’t love you. I don’t talk to my mom or dad to this day.

Respect to you ma’am! My dad used to beat my mom physically on a regular and she still raised us in that household, didn’t want to seperate because of us the kids. I really think he hit a woman because his dad did the same to his mom. But I will never do that to my wife

You may have been better for cutting your mother off, but from Ryan's facial expressions, that is not the case. Too many traumatic changes have occurred in Ryan's life at pivotal points for Ryan to be okay. This is the Ryan Lochte that lied about being robbed at gunpoint in Brazil during the 2016 Olympics . When in fact, Ryan and friends were drunk and destroyed property at a gas station. Ryan's career continued to spiral out of control from that moment on.

It hurts a lot at first and the guilt and shame is real.

Yes, it’s painful, and you mourn. No one says it’s easy, but it might save your life.

@@TaraHower hellz yes. Cutting off a parent doesn’t mean you cut off your whole family, but in reality that’s often the case.

I moved out of my mums hse 15 yesterday old never returned im 35,,, no I not answering her calls enough of drama mother that's it

Apparently, women do not apologize and that includes moms - and that comes from experience.

Very true. I'm a 37/F and if I ever want children, I will 100% adopt or foster to adopt. It's just hard finding a man who shares the same beliefs. There are enough kids out there who need true parents that weren't born to parental types and in unfortunate circumstances that they can't break away from. Also, a very interesting 23andMe result later in life also taught me just how little blood factors into the person you become.

Procreation doesn’t equate parenting.

I agree but what about spoiled ass kids

Nicely put! I think it sucks to not have great parents but if you get parents that just....procreate. That don't seem like they are meant to "parent " in any real way (unable or unwilling) The journey becomes something else. 🤔 How can I best parent my young self and thus, my own babies. Welcome. 💗 I am a woman of a lifelong suicidal mom. She completed suicide eventually when I was 39 . My son 9 at the time. .She was 59 and her own mom....79. Traumatic? He'll ya! But the gratitude I have now for finding myself and giving myself what I clearly didn't get.( safety stability unconditional love...) is irreplaceable. I live a full life with presence and love because of and in spite of my struggles. 💜♥️

@@savinabees9220 well said. your words are very powerful and you carry with you such a positive way of thinking. you could definitely and easily have pulled the “i have an excuse” card to play right with the cycle of parenting you were raised around… major props to you for not blaming yourself for any of your Mom’s (or other family members) life choices or anything and choosing to parent in a way that you definitely seems to be 100% different than the childhood that you received. I truly hope that you are proud of yourself for the life choices you have made and changed for the better - if I was your kiddo, I’m be so thankful you came to this realization that being a truly great parent takes sooo much more than just the bare minimum. Kids are so self aware to what’s going on around them, even if they are still to young to even express themselves. Hell, I remember being about five and realizing I was the most emotionally mature person in a room of family members, which is sad looking back. I’m sure you can relate. Keep on keeping on down this positive track, girl! Much love from Kansas City! ❤️

Yes, that's true for most all of us who are born to a narcissist instead of a "mother" who is actually capable of love and empathy for their child. There is some freedom to learning they'll never be able to give an authentic apology, and to know they they were never capable of loving you no matter what you did or who you were. Narcissists are very damaged, emotionally arrested people.

Agreed 🗣U never get closure from Narcs

I went through this type of thing also. I am so much better for it. This isn't a mom thing or a dad thing...it is a person thing and you can make choices to be happy. Who is in and who is out. Live your life with goals for happiness.

​@@lifesabeach3424 The "maternal archetype" is a woman who's always sacrificing, supporting, loving, and doing for her children. In reality, though, our moms are human, with all the faults, frailties, and confused feelings that come with that mortal state.

@@lifesabeach3424 True, but staying in an abusive relationship is not healthy.

He sounds like a child? We are all children making pretend we are not. Dont be silly. Humans fear responsibility.

that's because he never grew up. he still acts like a child in his thirties and getting into trouble. he's going to have a hard time adjusting to his older years, especially with this unresolved baggage.

@@wincrasher2007 maybe to your standards

No he just knows this is gonna be viewed by millions of strangers and doesn’t really want them to know the specifics of his family’s private life and past. He’s choosing his words carefully. Also obviously just uncomfortable talking about the subject, has nothing do with his sports career.

He seems scared here.

My dad abandoned me when I was 6, came back into my when I was 18. We had a rocky relationship from 18-25. I am now 28 and haven’t talked to him in 3 years, haven’t heard a single word over text or call from him.

To hell with him. You are his God given gift and he treated you like s**t. Shame on him. You deserved better. May God bless you always. 🙏🏻 Lodie.

@@Utahtruckguy I’m so sorry. It isn’t your fault.

Amen to that!

Thats the way it should be

Yea this is gross

No one's forcing him to say anything

@Mike O i meant to send that in the direction of derek, i believe

@Mike O youtube sucks now

At least it ended on a high note...

Leave, it’s not worth your sanity.

Can’t agree with this thread more 🙌🏾

@R S123 That "guilty" feeling can be overcome. It comes from the gaslighting and abuse. Once you break free and begin the work of healing internally, the guilt will go away. Go no-contact from them and be FREE.

@R S123 God bless you when it gets down to you or them survival instincts take over and then you will feel free to escape..with your life.

Mine too, waiting for an apology I know will never come

I dont speak to my parents and sister either. It feels like a death.

@@RhondA11 yes. Because in essence, it is. Grieving is a process but if it was for the best, in time you will recognize so.

Tracy G thank you 🖤🙏🏼

I haven't talked to a certain family member in years, and it's never felt hard. There was very little to grieve by that point.

That happens. I endured abuse from my family all the way into my forties. When my children were old enough to be harmed, the door slammed shut and stayed shut.

I respect people that have little patience for crossing boundaries. I have been working all my life to set boundaries and I still get a hurt stomach when I stand my ground and protect myself.

For real

Well said.

Correction: Life is always harder than the Olympics. Olympics come and go, but life continues.

How could the questions be "too intrusive" when he agreed to do the interview, no doubt knowing that would be a major part of it.

@@judithrandall4690 Questions r generally approved by the interviewee ahead of time, so yes, he was aware. However, when you see someone beaten up why give him that extra kick in the gut? He may have known the questions, but he didn't realize his reactions would be so intense,

@@judithrandall4690 “What did she say?” Unnecessarily intrusive and I don’t think he was expecting that. I’m sure he just knew that they’d talk about the topic but not the questions specifically

Well that’s what he says we don’t know her mother version.

Good for you! 👏🏻

Well said

How did you accomplish this?

@@unknowntosociety01 You accomplish it one day at a time. When you are caught up in a dysfunctional family the only way to stop is to remove yourself totally from the dynamic. Is it hard? Yes. But soon weeks turn in to months turn in to years and you have your own new memories with the life you have created for yourself. Did I wish any of them harm? Absolutely not. But I realized one day I could not survive around them in any reasonable way.

Sure does

Graham needs to get a Z Gallerie contract and get the leather on the road.

NYCzora interesting observation.

Agree, but he was there to be interviewed in depth. He politely declined not to speak, then I believe it was therapeutic he did touch on the subject, and moved on. All is well.

Agree Maya. The story is more important than the person. What a shame.

@@arthurmiller9434 “The story is more important than the person”. In that one sentenced you encapsulated my exact feelings towards this interview. Bravo.

Graham has always been a bottom feeder pretending to be an Italian boy from the Bronx.

I’m glad I’m not the only one.

Nobody put a gun to this guys head and made home do this interview He is a grown man and chose to do this interview

I don't think he's inappropriate or pushy. I enjoy his interview style

Maybe, but this really helps other people who may have similar experiences, like myself. It's helps to hear I'm not the only one who doesn't have this perfect family and the most loving parents.

Best of luck mate hope she’ll come soon 😁

My three girls are 20, 17 & 15 and they have figured out that grandma is crazy.

Tommy Jakob Yikes! How do they deal with her if you don’t mind me asking. After my first one was born, we thought things would have gotten better in terms of relationships, (because he is the first grandchild for my parents;) but it never did and I never understood it until now. I’m sad that the kids won’t get to know their grandparents, but it’s for the best.

@@chicaarana1164 I live 300+ miles away in another city, so it is just phone calls. Whenever there is any communication, they are polite - not fake, just polite. My oldest is away at University and my middle one is very easy-going. My youngest is the comedian of the family and has sass, so phone calls are quite funny. Yes, it is a shame your kids won't have a proper grandparent - grandchild relationship but sometimes what you will see is neighbours and friends will be the uncles, aunts, grandparents, etc. they never had. You have done NOTHING wrong. You have done THE most RESPECTFUL thing. There ARE angels among us.

Same here.

Wow, she is toxic which means you don't need her around you and your kids.

👏🏼👏🏼They're called internet degrees, and they're rampant. One week a therapist. Next week nutritionist. Then Child development. And so on.

Ty Pate you had me in stitches with your comment. Spot on!!

@@LadyEowyn 😂😂😂😂😂 you are too much.

So spot on, yet here we are doing the same thing we are accusing others of doing… 🤫

@@marcom6089 how do you figure that? People making assumptions about him without any evidence to back it up based solely on what they think, is nothing like reading those assumptions they’ve left in the comments (what we call facts, evidence, or proof), then without having access to his thought or feelings (something that is a non debatable fact) they presume to know what he’s feeling or thinking. Maybe next time champ 🤫🤡

I'm so sorry. That's an awful thing for anyone to say.

God bless you

We have to focus on a new family and leave the past behind. I am so sorry 😞

No way someone’s actions are your fault. I’m happy you realize that now. ❤️

Your mom is a monster for saying that to you. It was never your fault.

he did get robbed because he got drunk and knocked down a sign and had to pay for it, then the media blew it out of proportion

Platinum Pineapple He made an international incident out of the situation by saying he got held at gunpoint. Locte has always been known as an entitled prick amongst the swimming community.

William Cowell yea cool he still cool tho and a insanely talented swimmer

Platinum Pineapple WAS a talented swimmer. He done.

@@platinumpineapple9943 lol nope. he's done!

Exactly what I thought.

true

Right!

He feels vulnerable and thats ok..

@@ELLIOTTARMY I don't think the implication is bad. It's just not what you'd expect from someone his age. However, as we all know, tramua is difficult subject for most people. You can tell he's trying to be respectful to his parents. That adds to some of the awkwardness. Not bad. Just slightly awkward convo.

All parents are doing the best they can. Unfortunately a lot of times it's not good enough. Family dysfunction is generational.

@@brianwalsh1401 its about love and they are lacking..

@@ariloves10 Yes. Maslow's 3rd level of the hierarchy of needs is love, affection and belonging. Before we can love others we need to love ourselves. You can't give away what you don't have.

@@brianwalsh1401 I can halfway agree because I have seen spiteful hearts who had love, but rejected it. They chose hate. As for belonging, its a mixed bag of nuts in USA with almost everyone from another part of the world feels less than. If you are a have not, you hate the haves. If you are brown you hate white. If you are poor you hate rich. If you are sad you hate happy. People need Jesus, or they get seduced by the devil, and then hate, sickness and death overtake them. Nothing to see here but people throwing their families away to fulfill their own selfish desires.

It's easy to say that when you have decent kids. Some people aren't that fortunate; despite being great parents, their kids grow up to be horrible, toxic people.

Yeah Lochte looks good, but boy he’s really stupid

Stupidity has nothing to do with using poor English. You’ve demonstrated that in your post.

For me it was my aunt. We were close because we'd both been through a similar life changing experience but she can't keep the drama out of her life and would constanly get high or drunk and send the most horrible messages. Had to cut her out of my life. I still care about her but can't have anything to do with her.

You're selfish..but your mom is probably relieved that she doesn't have to deal with you too.. LOL

@Vonnie - We’re not put on this earth to judge and you know nothing about my situation to qualify such a statement. I will hold you in prayer that kindness towards others finds your heart more quickly than judgement.

@Red It’s a difficult process, for sure. I wish you well.

@@gd3944 ..I have kindness in my heart, I'm not like you.. I talk and even take care of the people who were not the best to me!.. that's where we differ, I try to comprehend why people are like they are.. even in the end when I may not understand I don't shut them out l, I figure I haven't walked in their shoes and they have done the best with what they know!.. I could never imagine never speaking my parent again..but heyyyy you be happy ok 🤔🙄..LOL..

It was so blown out of proportion

Sorry that you had to go through that. Hope that things are better for you now. People who always try risky ways (like harming others) to try and achieve what they think they want, are typically always feeling weak from struggling in the mess they can't extricate themselves from. So they exert control on other people they think they can still have a hold over. If we ever are targets of this kinds of abuse, always remember that our job is not to continue to struggle and submerge, but to break the web of trouble that is spun around all connecting these issues and emerge to start your life anew. Wishing you good luck with life, you've got this.

Good for you for cutting off the toxicity. She sounded miserable.

Agreed!!!

Yes absolutely!!!! Graham is quite good at this.

Graham is incredible. Huge huge fan.

Not really, but ok.

False

That's simply your interpretation and it is by no means accurate. Its a part of life. You work through it given you can find the right people, tools and healing mechanisms. A life full of pain will come with bad feelings. Its Just that simple.

@@robyndismon394 bad feelings cause a life of pain? I think not. Try bad decisions. Good day to you.

@@BillyN31 you missed the point completely.

His mother could do that if she chose to. He pretty much openly declared that all he’d want is an apology on behalf of the nasty things she said abt his family once he announced a child on the way.

Right, graham needs to chill the hell out.

It’s an interview that’s his job 🤔

God bless you 🙏 we can break the cycle by being aware of our family disfunction and consciously breaking the pattern 🙏

Wise of you

Wish I could do that. But mine decides to threaten suicide when I put up boundaries. Then tries to protect her husband who is inappropriate around my kids. Reconciliation will never happen for me. And my step mom just died. I have no mother.

That was your situation and that’s wonderful that you had a different perspective once u put yourself into her shoes and were able to reconcile. I think many of the folks here though unfortunately have had situations in which they’ve been treated like a doormat by their parent and couldn’t take it.

@@SupernaturalLove100 IMO I believe that our newest generation are emotional wrecks, they are offended by everything, and tend to be narcissistic, they will have a hard life b/c many have decided to not forgive but instead hold grudges, and instead of god in their lives, they value self-image over anything

Why are you yelling?

We know this dude lies and doesn’t make good choices so I also would like to hear the mother’s side too.

Is funny how society doesnt the same thing when women go out crying victim, hence #BelieveAllWomen smh

His wife modeled for playboy

More like Sylvester Stallone

@@michelebergman4336 Yeah, I get a lot of Stallone from him too.

Men have a hard time talking about their feelings let alone it being on national video. When he said "I haven't really talked about it" means, this is the first time expressing his pain, which is a big deal. Divorce really damages a person more than a person who never experienced can imagine. He's not medicated, he's super uncomfortable talking about his feelings and his body language is showing that because he's not an actor who knows how to hide their body language and fake the funk.

@@iKeto_gal good point

@@iKeto_gal nailed it, good job

First of all, he's never been good at talking in interviews. Ever. Add in that he's talking about something really deep and personal to him, I don't blame him for taking his time being careful with what he's saying

You're medicated Roger..

idk about that, this part of the interview seems way too personal. you can tell that ryan is extremely uncomfortable talking about this. not sure graham should’ve kept digging the way he did

You are here and the sun still shines. You survived. Stay up

Eye 2 Eye same situation with my Mom, she’s been gone 7 years now

You sound like a good person, and someone who actually learned from a bad situation. Your thoughts about your Mom are probably VERY comforting to her as she watches over you now.

Maybe because he committed vandalism in a foreign country and blamed it on brown people and ran away onto a plane like a little bitch?

@David Pumpkin Probably not. But now that it's being discussed on RU-vid...

Exactly. Yet people are on here calling his mother a narcissist! Lot of drama loving people in the comments projecting their own issues.

I'm sure it kills our mothers as well, but they still say what they say.

WD Harris you’re right, I don’t think that’s fair to try and break some one on camera.

R S123 I’m a bit older now but while in my 30’s (now late 30’s) I often stayed with parents and still do stay there from time to time. Things will continue and worsen if staying the same household with someone toxic and insecure. Best bet is to do what I did, move out to the best of your abilities and then visit back home or stay home occasionally and when she has her flares you just leave. Unless she can seek help which I assume she refuses to.