SECURE ATTACHMENT AND PARENTING | DR. KIM SAGE

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*****FOR MORE INFORMATION ONLINE COURSES AND FREE CHECKLIST:
www.drsagehelp.com
**************************
Please check out my courses (LINK ABOVE):
1. BORDERLINE AND NARCISSISTIC PARENTS: HEALING AND DEALING WITH YOUR TRAUMA
(*This course is designed specifically for you if you were raised by parents who had Narcissistic, Borderline or significantly Emotionally Immature parents.)
2. RE-MOTHERED: TRANSFORM YOUR WOUNDED INNER CHILD INTO AN INTERNALIZED, LOVING "MOTHER"
(***This course is designed to help you learn to heal your inner child AND your inner parent if you experienced a complicated childhood or challenging relational wounds).
3. IDENTIFYING CHILDHOOD EMOTIONAL ABUSE AND NEGLECT (FREE COURSE)
CHECKLIST IS INCLUDED IN ALL 3 COURSES!!**
xo
***Please note! I am so sorry but my practice is full at this time and I cannot accept new patients. If you would like to be added to my waitlist, please email me at drsagehelp@gmail.com and I will email you only when a spot becomes available. I cannot guarantee a spot will open, however, so please know I care very much, but am limited at this time given my case load.
* Additionally, I am only able to work with California residents for weekly therapy once available. If you are interested, please also add in a few brief details in your email including your reasons for seeking treatment, current diagnoses, concerns, etc.

Опубликовано:

8 июн 2024

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Комментарии : 9

@abbywolf9701 Год назад

My first baby is almost 5 months old. I’m so excited to watch her grow, but I definitely worry about repeating the patterns of my parents. I already see my mom trying to insert her ideas about raising children (she was very authoritarian) and it breaks my heart for my younger self. I was talking about my baby having a hard time latching to breastfeed, and how frustrating it could be when we finally had a good latch and she would adjust and break the seal. My mom in all her wisdom said that this was “just the first discipline issue of many” and that I needed to toughen up and “stop letting her run things” like ma’am… we’re both learning how to work together to get her fed… it’s not a discipline thing, it’s just new for both of us. Really put my upbringing into perspective

@raina4732 Год назад

I had a very similar experience! I’m sorry she is giving you her bad advice! It can be really shocking to realize how off their parenting was. When my baby was born she couldn’t latch, so she wasn’t drinking milk “naturally.” I was pumping and also using a nipple shield when we could, to help her still get my milk and slowly learn. And my mother told me that she’s just being manipulative and lazy (she was literally a week old), and that I needed to stop pumping and using a nipple shield, and when she was hungry enough she would stop being lazy and just latch and drink for her own survival. Anyway, glad I ignored that golden piece of advice, I continued with the nipple shield and pumping/ bottle, and after a month of lots of work and patience my baby’s latch was perfect and we could breastfeed naturally for the remainder of her infancy! I was so proud of myself for having patience, and not blaming my baby. It was a major yikes moment for me to realize how off my mother’s parenting was. Many more examples as my children are older toddlers and she inserts her “wise” motherly (neglectful) advice. It’s eye opening to see how we were raised from the beginning. I’m also terrified of subconsciously repeating some of the things she did. Congratulations on your baby and keep trusting your deep motherly bond to your baby! We can do this.

@abbywolf9701 Год назад

@@raina4732 I’m so proud of you for sticking with it, and ignoring her awful advice! It hurts to hear how she must have treated you. Im so sorry, and I hope you’re getting the love and support you deserve ❤️❤️ thank you for the encouragement!

@EsseQuamVideriSe7en Год назад

Dr. Sage, I love your content. I doubt you will ever know the impact you are having on people's lives - like mine. I always wondered why I couldn't connect closely with my wife of 19 years even though I desperately wanted to. You've helped me understand my Avoidant Style and how, somewhere under the surface, I have been fearful of vulnerability. I've watched dozens of your videos, at times taken pages of notes on a single video, and am currently binge watching even more. Thank you for this incredible content. Your time investment must be huge and I want you to know I appreciate it. I do have one question for you. You mentioned before having a reading list on your site. I haven't been able to find this. I've read Attached, Created for Connection, and Wired for Love in the last month but my hunger for more knowledge seems insatiable. I so desperately want to save my marriage and show my wife, for maybe the first time in her life, how worthy of love she is!

@alexandrugheorghe5610 7 месяцев назад

Have you considered therapy?

@EsseQuamVideriSe7en 7 месяцев назад

@@alexandrugheorghe5610 Thanks for the reply. Yes, I have done some therapy. I was with a psychologist for a while and he didn't want to go deep on past wounding. He wanted to teach me some "techniques". I felt this was superficial. Like putting a bandaid on a gaping wound. I then went to a counsellor who specialized in EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy). I thought this would delve into the deep seeded hurts behind my Avoidant Attachment Style. After half a dozen sessions in which I was repeatedly told that I had "a good grasp of the situation" again, without much looking into the core wounds that are at the center of my behaviour, I decided to keep working on myself. My hope is to do couples counselling if and when my wife is willing to do that but for now I am following some great channels on relationships and am learning to do the work I need on my own. I am focusing on - God, and who HE wants me to be as a man, husband and dad. - Feeling the emotions I have pushed down for decades. Still scary but it's something I am aware of now. - Not using social media, video games, porn, or sports to sooth myself when I am triggered. - Communication. Active listening and allowing for others to express feelings. - Building relationships with others. A key to mental health. Thanks again. Take care.

@jstellato921able 11 месяцев назад

You’re amazing Dr. Kim! I am learning so much from you and your online videos. You are a master at teaching and breaking down difficult concepts to be easily understood. Thank you! 🤗

@ibelieveinaccuracy.fact-ch5942 Год назад

Well said. Excellent resources. Thank you. I wanted a description of the dysfunctional but the title reminded me to seek a description of ‘normal’ as a anchor point - a ‘nest’.