That’s actually VERY cruel, imagine feeling like you’re being watched for 2 years only to find out that your husband was manipulating you despite going through all that trauma
@@camlee2341Clearly her husband had control issues. She was probably so afraid to respond in any way or her husband might accuse her of encouraging the guy.
This woman must've had the shock of her life learning the true identity of her husband. What an evîl man. And why did he do this? For fun? Truly despicable
It's more likely that he was having an affair with someone and now wanted the other woman. So since divorces can be messy, he concocted a way to destroy her without suspicion. He almost got away with it. Truly evil. I hope she took him to the cleaners.
@@timlass6103 I don't think he wanted to leave her, in fact I think he didn't want her to leave him. It sounds like extreme paranoia on his part to me, considering he was able to be her whiteknight when she was at her lowest and she never wanted to leave the house. He did this so she'd never leave him.
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As soon as you said Paul "became her only source of comfort and safety", AND that he didn't want her to go to the police? DING DING DING! We have a winner! It's not some random ex, it's the husband! But he was writing that stuff about _their daughter?_ wtf dude? And he only got 3 years??? Sometimes the justice system really sucks! 3 years is a joke! I hope to god she filed for divorce AND sole custody, with NO visitation rights for that twat!!! I wouldn't let that man within 100 yards of my kids if I was Amanda. I wouldn't even want him in the same county/state as my kids! I'm really not 1 to swear, but what a sick bastard!!!😠😡🤬
@@Connjur like he's an actual certifiable psychopath though. Not the randomly thrown around and overused version nowadays. Like this would be a full clinical assessment and diagnosis that this guy is _seriously_ fubar'd! His ass needs to be in prison for a _long time._ Then, after getting out, he needs to spend whatever years he may have remaining paying this poor woman a MASSIVE amount of compensation for this truly heinous act. What happened must have been awful to go through, but to learn it was your own husband all along? I can't imagine what the weird feeling of relief, that it _wasn't_ some random psycho out to get her and the kids, mixed with the devastating realisation that it was your HUSBAND all along must have felt like. And the total betrayal of that discovery must have just rocked this poor woman's entire world. This man is EVIL!
@@leannes1083are you saying this based on anything other than your personal assessment of the situation? Or still just “psychopath” being thrown around by people online??
You should read the book "The Breakdown" by B.A Paris. Its inspired by this case and theres way more into the book than in the video. 100% woukd recommend, the plot twist is crazyyy
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I remember this case. He left out the fact that Paul was a violent childish man and she was thinking about leaving him because she couldn't take it anymore. He sensed that he was losing her and did this to make her stay (and love him again).
The sad part is that she will still see herself as deserving of that abuse and/or will struggle with the idea that if she were better he wouldn't have done that. His behaviors are his own and are ONLY a statement about him. I wish people could understand this, (self included).
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Respectfully, no, no it’s not. Physical abuse includes them doing stuff that’s horric like this. Imagine going through stuff like this while they also beat and/or sexually assaulted you on top. Then you are just beginning to imagine how bad it actually is. No hate or anything, I’m sure you meant well but I can’t just scroll by something this inaccurate and not at least try to correct the record. I know from first hand experience that what I’m saying is true unfortunately.
Gaslighting and isolation is seriously one of the most evil ways of abusing someone. It leaves no visible traces and it can even make you feel stronger postitive feelings towards your abuser while they are destroying your life.
@@aradialefae4777 Yes. I know exactly what you mean. I went through that for years. They break you til there’s nothing left of you. Make you solely rely on them. Fortunately I was able to break free. But I still suffer from my trauma 😢
@@aradialefae4777 well I see what you mean, but i do not agree with your take and how you are trying to "correct"someone you dont know, they could very well have been trough both too, right? ☺ As someone who was both ra*ped and beat so badly I could have died, multiple times, (which REALLY fricken hurt, worst physical pain I have been in, that was my point haha) I can absolutely say the psychological abuse from that man was worse, it almost drove me to end myself, and I wanted nothing more than live, he would play horrific mind games with me, I cant really write it all here bc of youtube, but he scared me and Fd me up so much I just BEGGED him to just hit me or just end me instead. And do NOT think the beatings and ra*pe wasn't hell on earth bc it ABSOLUTELY was, but my mind was the ONLY place I could run to during my time at his hands, it was my only escape, and even THAT he took from me. I'm still hunted by it. So I just hope you can understand why it can make people feel like that it is one of the worst things you can do to a person, just look at psychological warfare and torture and you'll see what I mean. So maybe dont try to "correct" others like that, the only thing you do by doing that is minimize abuse that is just as bad. There will always be a grade of severity ofcs, but let's not try to tell others that they are wrong when we are talking about stuff like this, we are all different. Psychological abuse is a hell and a pain that's indescribable to those who haven't felt it, most of us have felt physical pain to a degree, but mental pain is also just as horrific. I feel It's just way to dangerous to compare abuse like you did, cuz it can make people feel like it's not that serious when it is and they should leave. So try to be kind, and maybe say "okay I dont agree with you bc --- but could you maybe tell me why YOU fell that way?" And then we can have a good and respectful convo instead 😅 No hate like u said, english isn't my first language so I hope I came trough as respectful and thoughtful, know that I tried haha!😅 Much love!❤
@@ansteve1yeah good point, that is very true! My abuser also did the "typical" shiz like that, not letting me see my family, and it wasn't just control, it was pure INSANE jealousy too, i wasn't even allowed to see my dad or brother bc he thought I cheat with them, like WTF, that's so sick I want to puke just thinking of it! He knew my childhood and what hell it was and all my fears and he really played on them, he really made me feel like could only trust him and nobody else, absolutely not the cops etc. I'm also autistic and that really made stuff worse. Yeah psychological abuse is really in a category of itself, horrific 🤮
@@AneliuseHe literally tortured people, and you say it’s overreacting to think that a 3 year sentence is a joke? You’re sick. It’s a special kind of evil to torture your family like that.
30 years, just what was that guy's intention embarking on such seemingly pointless endeavour? My heart goes out the mother and the kids, hope they're doing well
I was trying to understand that as well, so I was in the comments to see if someone had insight. If I had to guess or roll the dice on this, I would assume that she was going to leave him and this very elaborate scheme is probably what he decided to do to keep her w him.
@@jordonm5675He probably became disillusioned with his life with her but was so possessive that he couldn't stand the thought of her being with anyone else. Maybe she didn't look as attractive as he felt she used to, or she had become less dependent on him, and they started fighting. Sounds like a narcissist to me. If they fought and she was avoiding him, he could continue tormenting her with the emails non-stop in order to force her to rely on him.
He probably has some sort of savior complex. Since his damsel was not in any distress, he created the distress so he can be her knight in shining armour. She was isolated for two years, in constant fear, and completely dependent on him emotionally. That small small man must have felt like he is needed again.
You should read the book "The Breakdown" by B.A Paris. Its inspired by this case and theres way more into the book than in the video. 100% woukd recommend, the plot twist is crazyyy
As soon as I heard "she went to the police against her husband's advice" I instantly knew who it was. What kind of normal husband would not want police involved in such situations? Scratch that. What kind of normal husband would WILLINGLY want to hurt their significant other?
Well, there are people who have absolute no faith in the police, or hate them, so they become so stubborn they prefer a "DIY" solution. But in this case the husband would be taking measures to catch the ex. Another possibility is some may have also have got affected by the messages and fear what might happen by reporting it. Those sound like the two most possible reasons. But seeing as this isn't a normal relationship and the husband was behind it, makes sense why he was against it.
Let this serve as a warning for everyone, that the second this starts happening, reach out to the police. No one deserves to suffer in silence, whether it's stalking, abusive behavior, etc. Psychologically we do better when the truth is out. I feel really bad for her! But, sometimes we think it'll stop or that is not a big deal, or that is not criminal, but anyone who's capable of doing this is extremely dangerous and it's a giant red flag. Get the police involved right away.
You should read the book "The Breakdown" by B.A Paris. Its inspired by this case and theres way more into the book than in the video. 100% woukd recommend, the plot twist is crazyyy
The fact that he didn't want her to go to the police is a major red flag, but I completely understand that she couldn't see that. Man, that's just fucking cruel.
He did what a child abuser would do to trigger a suicide attempt in their victims. The unresolved traumas from our childhood are that powerful, and child abusers use victim "suicides" to bury their sins.
I wouldn’t be surprised if he wanted her to “pass away” so he could have unrestricted access to their children (without the wife watching over). Just look at the messages he wrote about his young teenage daughter, and those are just the messages that were shown. This went on for 2 years, who knows what other unhinged stuff he said about their daughters. He’s sick in the head
Red flag was him telling her not to go to the police. What spouse who sincerely loves and cares about you would tell you not reach out for help, while you're clearly being stalked?!😢
Man I was thinking, what a good husband, being there and supporting her through a difficult time, buuut it turned out to be him all along. What a criminal
It's so crazy that after more than 25 years of marriage he started scaring her and the kids with the fake stalking / threats of harm. I'd never trust anyone else ever again. I hope the mom and kids are safe.
This woman unfortunately doesn’t seem to be too bright. I saw the interview and it was just red flag after red flag. But she ignored it for 2 years. I mostly feel bad for the daughters, he was sending sexual threats about them. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if she took him back. Typical joke of a sentence from the UK justice system. Madness. 🤦🏾♀️
I’d never be able to trust anyone again. I’m a child abuse survivor and already have extreme trust issues (PTSD, cPTSD, permanent nerve damage all from violence during child/teen years), but if someone that was supposed to love me, protect me, be there for me, support me did THAT?!? Nah, that’s it, game over, I’m moving to the mountains and avoiding people for the rest of my life just to avoid the potential of being traumatised ever again.
What a d-bag! Although everyone is saying "Only 3 years!" I'm over here surprised he got any jail time at all. My ex was constantly stalking me. I even went to the police sub-division with him following behind me (in his friend's car while wearing a wig!) and they (the police) could clearly see he was following me, when I pulled out of the sub-division he got right behind me again, and I couldn't even get a PTO !!!!!!! Because he had not "done" anything. After that he thought he was untouchable and got progressively worse! I worked 45 minutes from where I lived at the time and he would drive to my job and flatten my tires, repeatedly!!!! So, although this guy ONLY got 3 years, I'm still glad he got something and the courts let him know that this is not okay!
I’m with you in this! I’m wondering what technicality he got put away on bc psychologically messing w someone gen isn’t illegal enough to go to jail for and even threatening people is a bit of a weird gray area depending on the circumstances… And even stalking you often have to have a restraining order first and then violate it to get in any real trouble - and even THEN people don’t go away for 3 whole years! The law really is not on the side of the victim in these situations. I’m not saying it’s right, just that it is. I, too, have been stalked. Back in the 90s when I was young and proving anything was next to impossible in the pre email, pre texting days. All threats and intimidation etc were in person, happened in real time. And also no cell phones to call for help back then either. It was an extra vulnerable time to be a woman. But it’s always a vulnerable time when there’s a crazy dude around…. I’m glad you made it through ok and are safe now. That kinda stuff changes us.
Bro that is a level of insanity I cannot even comprehend, bro these people are saints they did not deserve all this trauma. I genuinely hope everyone mentioned is fine. 🙏🙏
Immediately it was pointed out that the husband said not to go to police about it, it made sense that he's the culprit or at least a major accomplice. For the safety of a man's kids, wife and the family well being, that's not something a normal husband would and should say.
The fact the husband didn't want her to go to police was very suspicious considering pictures were taken and sent of her and private details being known lead to only a few people
I think this women better consider moving out of country before the guy gets released from jail. If he was this much of a nutjob while married to her I can only imagine how he might retaliate once out of jail. A lot of countries wont let this guy even travel there if he has a criminal record.
Anyone close to you that doesn't want you to go to the police when you are very legitimately being threatened or feel as if you're being threatened that person is probably involved.
I remember a case where a husband was receiving threatening letters from someone who claimed to have slept with his wife. She was completely stumped because she had been faithful and it caused a huge rift between them. Well the letters got worse and worse until finally, she was found strangled in the family car. Police got suspicious and investigated. It turned out the husband was the one sending the letters and was the murderer. Investigators theorized that he was jealous of his wife and feared losing her for some reason so he came up with these letters in a twisted way to get her to turn back to him. They also theorized that the wife found out about the letters or had enough with his controlling behavior. This angered the husband and he ended up killing her. So yeah. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
I vaguely remember a similar story: A kid that was bullied severely almost everywhere on the internet finally contacted authorities for help, and it turned out those bullies were ALL played by this kid's own mother!
So I bet this began with him testing his wife by pretending to be this former boyfriend. When she rejected his advances and basicly passed his little test, he turned to attacking her and insulting her in a bid to make himself look good like the loving supportive husband, and as time passed and she became depressed she became easy to control. Total monster
I wonder if he was always psychotic or something happened that made him snap because this is a crazy thing to suddenly do after 30 years of marriage. I don't know how you even recover from such a betrayal. This is genuinely a reason just not to trust again.
After everything he put his wife & kids through, threatening them etc, he only got 3 years!!???! What the actual f*ck! He deserves much longer behind bars & his wife & kids deserve to feel safe for much longer!
What kind of person waits 2 years before going to the police?? I would have filed a report for harassment after the first messages no matter what anyone said.
He wanted to be her hero, he is truly a weak being. Reminds me of those horrible mothers who harm their kids for attention. I hope her and her kids find happiness and safety now
being together for 30 years. having children and figuring out your husband, who was trying to comfort you, & have you not call the police is so traumatic. of course she probably trusted him so she listened. this poor woman and her kids. glad she finally went to the police can’t imagine how terrible it was to find out it wasn’t her ex from years and years ago it was the man she was married to and had children with!!!!!! hope she has gotten mental health help.
Scaring her into staying at home in fear so she can run to him for comfort? Absolutely disgusting. The way he even told her to not go to the police so as to not rat him out! Hell and him are inevitable.
First red flag. A guy is emailing your wife constantly after she tells him to stop, and as her husband, you do not either immediately go track the guy down or immediately call the police. That would never happen.
It was the cat texting the messages, who was trying to send him to prison, her in a mental institution and the kids to grandma. People, no drama and noise in the house. Your cat will thank you.
