SHE IS PREACHING! WHY MANY WILL NEVER FIND PARTNER. - Lori Gottlieb 

As someone who's been married for almost 19 years and together with the same man for almost 20, I must say that it is a BLOODSPORT to be married. You have to communicate constantly and forgive forgive forgive. You can't be selfish or egocentric to make it work. You might not always be super attracted to your spouse and sometimes they drive you crazy with how sexy they are. It's having someone to lay down with at night and have MEMORIES with. Child raising is HARD!! You can't put YOUR material wants before your child's.

I bet one of the 300 reasons were " he was a scorpio."

Mom once told me marriage is finding the set of flaws you can live with 😆

When I started dating my boyfriend, he would always say he's a boring person. After 6+ yrs I came to realize that him being boring was more of him being non confrontational and having virtually zero drama around him. It's his "boringness" that I have learned to appreciate all these years.

Not even just in romantic relationships: I’ve seen friendships fall apart because someone doesn’t put in the work to connect, compromise and overcome. You can’t have a good thing without DOING what needs to be done!

Girls deadass be like “I really liked him he was cool but he was an Aries” but crying they single GTFOH 😭😭😭

My husband and I are incredibly well matched but we are polar opposites, and that's why we work. He hates talking to strangers, so I make all of his non-work calls for him. He hates strangers touching him, so I cut his hair. My haircut is $300. He loves sports, I ran like a girl, now I use a wheelchair. I took ballet. I love to try new things, he likes the same seven dinners. But, we are in love. When I got sick with cancer, he spent literally every night in the hospital next to me. To the point I called up his friends and told them to take him out for something fun to do together, and my mom came to sit with me so he could relax and feel like a person, not a caregiver. Now that I'm healthy, we do things he likes much more often. I don't like to fish, but I like to make him happy. We go camping. We go watch baseball games. We are so good together, and he's my prince charming. Edited to add: one thing we are badly matched on is movies we like. His favorite movie is Dumb & Dumber. Mine is All About Eve. So we just watch different things from the same sofa, using headphones but still cuddling and spending time together. I got great advice on marriage from my senior year English teacher: if you squeeze your toothpaste at the end and your spouse squeezes from the middle and leaves the cap off, have two tubes of toothpaste.

I’m south Asian… a lot of generational Americans look at me sideways when I say love has this 🤏🏽 much to do with a successful marriage… I’ve seen firsthand love between 2 strangers bound by commitment grow. You don’t make permanent decisions based on temporary emotions.

"Happiness is the byproduct of duty and responsibility". That's a good quote

Imperfect people expecting perfection from imperfect people will always end in misery.

If a girl told me she rejected me because of the color of my belt, or my celebrity impressions, or because we don't read the same books... she'd make me getting over her *very* easy.

My daddy died one month and two days before he and mom’s 75th anniversary. We had big celebration plans. He and mom were a love match. Over the years they had become one person. When I think of my parents I see them in their 90s walking together hand in hand.

Do people realize how damn beautiful this video is? These brothers are dropping diamonds! In your brain!!

Somebody once said "people are ready for weddings, but not ready for marriage" 💯💯

Some girls: 80% match is settling. Also some girls: Why am I still single?

That is sooo true! The first time I saw my now husband he was “alright”, like attractive enough but not like an “OMG I’m dying!” And than I met him and got to know him and it turned out we were a perfect match! Same life philosophy, same goals, same ideals. Of course he is not perfect. He is constantly late, very nonchalant about things, whereas I’m the perfectionist organizer who is rarely late and gets overly stressed when I am late for some reason. But I wouldn’t be with anyone else! If anything like a soulmate exists, than I think that is it. Had I not gotten to know him because I wasn’t a fan of his style ( and trust me, I wasn’t 😅) I would have missed out on the best 9 years of my life and a beautiful family.

I’ve been binging all your videos this last month and just gotta say, you guys are good men. Wish more young men and woman would hear you guys for these perspectives. Im a 32 year old white gay man, so probably not your prime demo, but I relate to you guys and your values so much. Keep at it! ❤️❤️

My dad always told me that love isn't a feeling. It's a decision marked by action.

I was married for 20 years before she died. So grateful for that woman who was there and we made it work.

This discussion helped me resolve 12 years of chasing my dreams and following with guilt and shame. Im turning 33 soon and am slowly getting over the narrative that "Im a late bloomer" "a social failure" . Im good with the solid person I am after yrs of abusive challenges resulting in positve change, I am alot more self aware and emotional responsible than some more "well adjusted" friends. And am grateful now. Life is a circle. Keep on truckin

Speaking as a dude in his late 20s looking for a long term relationship, this is some of the best relationship advice I think I've ever heard.

If women found a man that liked all the same things, at some point, they'd break up with him, claiming they were bored because he didn't introduce them to anything new...hahaha!

"The guys who are bad first daters, might be great life partners." Nothing has ever been more true. Narcissists and Sociopaths are the types of people who can score an A+ on the first date. If thats your type, then more power to ya. But dont complain about him later.

I'm 22 and single af, but these are things I've known for awhile now. A mindset of stability, consistency, and compromise is what I already knew when I started to get into dating at 17. At that time I saw that a lot of girls were still just kids at heart and either weren't into dating yet or just wanted to chase the popular guys for the thrill, which is just how high school is. I figured I could give it a few patient years and work on myself, and that by my early 20s when most girls were getting through college or careers they'd grow up and start dating realistically. The problem is that I'm here now and I'm watching women either give up completely or go through college disconnected from reality, never working a normal job and entirely relying on daddy's money. If I look past the burnt out and the childishly oblivious ones, there's very few grounded ones that are both happy to be alive and have the grit to work hard and be down to earth. So it's already a struggle to even find the good ones, then there has to be some chemistry there when I do, and I'm like a Pete Davidson with farmboy energy, so, niche lol. I guess it's just a game of more patience and perseverance, but I want to get on it now because I, unlike the culture around me, really value legacy and family pride, to pass greatness on to my generations. So "where are the good men"?? Out here knowing what they want and working toward it. I'm tired of a world that only gives me novelty. I want a familiar face that I built a history with to come home to. I want a body that I cherish and am devoted to to show my love to. I want to walk side-by-side, eye-to-eye with my woman and have it be us against the world. I want to really mean those vows. I don't want to just be entertained. I don't aspire to be the pinnacle of the modern man, but to be timeless. It just feels like I'm living in a time that these kinds of things are all but forgotten. Women praise men for doing the bare minimum, like being hygienic, having a clean house, cooking basic meals and not spending more than they make. I do all of that and know it's far less than I could. I'd rather be encouraged to be better, than be told I should be content with who I already am, but having grown up with an emotionally absent dad, that's not an innate mindset. That's one of the ways I'm determined to raise my kids better than I was. The top comment here calls marriage a bloodsport. I freaking love that. But if I'm in a bloodsport, do I tell myself, "Eh, I'm good enough?" Hell no. But even though I understand this, it's really fn hard to live by it in today's weak culture. I salute men like Aba and Preach, Jordan Peterson, Bill Burr, and women like Sydney Watson for being voices of grounded truth in the way to live and be. For now, I suppose I can only continue on and pray I can make these things happen with someone in the future.

"Warm and kind." I cannot emphasize how important this is as a character for a person you are dating regardless of gender.

" The secret to happiness, you see, is not found in seeking more, but developing the capacity to enjoy less" - Socrates

80% is settling? Nobody is perfect and if you’re looking for the perfect partner, you’re going to be alone forever

Great video. So true. My parents were married 40+ years. It’s hard work every day. People who think it should be easy and dip when the going gets rough or they don’t get every little thing they think they want don’t get it. I’ve been happily married for 6 years and even though it’s challenging and takes SO much communication it is so worth the effort. I have a great job, my man dropped his career when mine got so crazy it was hard to maintain the home with the hours I put in. He makes the home and I bring home the bacon. We both are playing to our strengths and it’s awesome, but it’s sacrifice. The illusion people have around what marriage should be is insane to me. No room for selfishness on either part. Anyway, love your channel and your perspectives. Intellectual conversations can be so hard to find these days. Very refreshing content!

Still watching but I have to say this was addressed for me in therapy. I'm in my mid thirties and haven't been married. I was intentionally looking and dating for a year and decided to seek therapy for help. One of the exercises that I did was list my top needs in a relationship, then divide that in half, and then pick the top 5 out of these things. It showed me that I can definitely be happy with someone that provided my top 5 as opposed to the top 20 so that's 25% and to me that wouldn't be settling and it would be things that mattered long term. However I needed to weight those needs. If I got the bottom 5 of my top 10 I couldn't accept it. So I honestly can understand why some ppl would think 80% is settling if that 20% was something like monogamy, love or feeling the same way about having children. Thank you for this video and your delivery. It's really a gift to be able to deliver harsh truths and force both men and women to be accountable without coming across as complete Jerks and assholes. I cannot express how much I appreciate your insights and just a living example that there are still great guys out there and on social media.

the internet really fucked up the dating market. the "fear of missing out" is only amplified by the ability to see hundreds of men/women you have this sense that you have soooo many more options than you actually do

i got engaged 6 months after meeting my fiancee. on our first date we discussed values and what sort of future we both wanted so we didn't waste our time. we both agreed that marriage was a commitment to value even after feelings fade. we may not be absolutely perfect for each other but we're both happy in each others' company and we're both willing to accept each others' flaws. you gotta look for people who can have these conversations early on.

I love how nuanced you guys are. You take such a real stance on how these sorts of things work. Real heroes in these days where you have incels and redpillers and all sorts of contrived nonsense. Keep up the high quality content, this is especially important for young audiences. Not to mention the rocking humour.

My friend broke up with this guy she was talking too ( he was amazing to her) bc he wears ankle socks. I told her that’s why you will forever be alone.

People who would “never settle” are the kind that would pass on $900,000 because it wasn’t a million

I was in it for 19yrs, raised another man's child and brought another into this world. I did as much comprise, and avoided fights. Did a lot of work. Let things roll off my back. Yet at some point I realized that my partner wasn't putting in the effort. I felt trapped and alone. I tried to cope and eventually I could not. I wanted a partner that wanted me good and bad. I wasn't perfect. My spouse told me that she was ready to move on if I couldn't shape up. Now she can't understand why I left. She was checking out before I said I was out. I still feel bad on some level but I can't take all the blame.

I never complain about being alone I know I’m intolerant And I know I don’t want to do the things I need to do to get and keep a partner I’m cool with that My peace is the most important thing to me and I will not invite someone in my life who disturbs my peace

"when the cake is cut, the dress is worn, and the flowers are faded you have marriage, and you have to work on that." Truth.

I love how you two are still in denial about being best friends.

My husband and I are very different people and a lot of time people say that to us. You wouldn't look at the two of us and assume that we would be together. But the two of us share common values and perspectives about life. We both value humor, working hard, installing values in our children, a positive attitude and making the best out of whatever hand life gives us, and learning to roll with the punches. Those things brings us together when we aren't exactly interested in the same things. We also value the differences between us. If we liked all of the same stuff, things would get boring. The differences between us are what create interest and desire in our relationship. We are open to trying something that the other one is interested in and it creates fun experiences for us. I think people get too caught up on the small stuff. They forget that good, long-term relationships are created with values, not tedious stuff.

Everytime i watch one of your videos with this kind of format I feel like you should be even more famous, because what you say and how you guys say is just so GOOD for society in general. I feel like your videos like these are so refreshing cuz it's not just have that video going and just talk about it while it's going. You guys take the video, watch with us viewers a piece of it and when the topic is set you guys just stop it and create this hugely, huuuuugely informative and understandable way of creating conversation that you don't even let the video resume. You focus on one topic and go profound, deeeeep on it. And I feel like yes, maybe you talk about less things in general, but the quality of the topic you are talkin about is so high. So apart from the actual topic and what I can take away from the good conversation, I also recognize and acknowledge that in life you gotta prioritize quality over quantity. Whether you are a RU-vidr and "react" to videos, or in any other aspect of life. So thank you so much Aba Thank you so much Preach. You guys contribute to my becoming a full on adult in the best way I can manage. Btw just to let you know, I'm from Italy so you got subscribers from here too

Aba & Preach: We're not friends Also Aba & Preach: *went to Haiti together and Met Preach's dad who loves Aba*

You guys are a breath of fresh air. Egoless, positive, and pragmatic. I’m so happy that young men (and even women) have someone way better than Fish and Chips to look to for guidance. Way to go. You guys are making a difference. Keep at it!

I love this video and the comments section. It's nice to know that so many other people think this way about relationships. I feel less scared about putting myself out there someday.

What I have observed in my personal life, im the only one married out of my 5 sisters, I'm the youngest and they constantly ask why they don't have a husband. They all have unrealistic expectations. Then they say they wont settle, or their man had to be on this level financially or this level in his career. Scratch all that, dont date a bum but be realistic. Them things take time. I think my sisters are marrying for security and I married for love. We got married at 19 and 21 on a rainy day in a courthouse. Came home to our empty apartment, ordered Chinese food and watched anime on an air mattress. Fast forward 9 years and we got good credit, nice home, nice cars and no more air mattresses 😭 We really built ourselves up from nothing and to know that someone will stick with you when you have nothing and be willing to build something with you. . .it is the most beautiful feeling in the world. I don't see my husband's flaws or shortcomings as settlements, I see them as perfect imperfections.

When Aba said love, and friendship are a byproduct of the hard work. Things like commitment and duty to each other. I fully support that! I have been with my wife for 14 years and married for 7 years. These small miniscule things have become more important compared to when it comes to larger goals in life like building a legacy. In today's society those small miniscule things have become the larger concerns. This is why people don't get married, don't stay married, or believe marriage is a bad thing. My wife and I are not the same, but like you 2 said we are aligned in these major concerns like family, raising kids, etc. I have achieved major things in life due to her support of me and her presence in my life. Marriage is a beautiful thing when 2 mature can come together. I am so happy and content with life, and I wish that for everyone.

Fellas you hit the nail on the head with this one.. Thanks for sharing some of your personal stories and getting this out there to the masses the masses!

I honestly shed a tear listening to this and thinking about my relationship with my partner. Thank you guys, you are awesome!

Exactly. Find a compatible partner. You literally don't need to have many interests in common. the only interest you need to have in common, is the other person.

Many women start out saying "I'm just looking for a nice guy." No they aren't.

As someone who got married young, (married at 20, divorced at 22 almost 23) I learned marriage is very hard. I always put myself on a back burner and it still wasn’t enough. Sometimes people don’t work. I did everything I could. I wanted to go to therapy. Marriage is about forgiveness. My husband went almost a full year ignoring me and arguing every single day. And I still wanted to work things out. Why? Because I loved him. Because I knew it was going to get hard. I didn’t fail, he did. I do want to add that we were also high school sweethearts. We were together from ages 14-22. It’s hard to let go sometimes

You both may not know me and you both may find this comment seemingly odd from a stranger. I just wanted to say that I love you both for this golden nugget of information. This video single-handly just changed how I viewed a relationship. I thought it was going to be that somebody accepts me for me and we just work through things. However, that is not the case. It involves values and common goals that are shared, depsite the difference in the person. It's the word "settling" that would give me anxiety because it has been associated with "not having the best that you can have." The fact that your inputs on the word "settling" verses the standard definiton of "settling" literally open my mind and I became more competent of being the person I'd like to be within seconds. I appreciate you both for boiling this concept down to the basic and the other perspectives that you presented as well.

When my husband and I started dating, I was so self-conscious about being boring or uninteresting. My husband (then boyfriend) had a crazy amount of hobbies/interests. I told him about that insecurity and he said, “You’re not boring; your predictable and that makes you reliable and I love that I can always count on you and trust your judgment.” Over time we have grown more similar to each other, and I now have way more hobbies. That said, we were very different from one another when we got together; but the values and goals were the same and it has made all the difference through the good and hard times.

My husband showed up to our first date with a mohawk that he had a friend do. I fucking hated it lol. 14 years later, I obviously chose to not care about the haircut.. it's just a haircut. That man is now the love of my life.

My boyfriend showed up to our first date in work boots and a stained yellow polo. He treats me better than any man ever has and genuine loves me for who I am- and I love him for who he is and am grateful to have found him. We're expecting a baby. I wouldn't have this little family if I had ruled him out over his outfit Edit: he also rolled a joint for us and I said we could only smoke in the bathroom. During our first date we smoked weed on a toilet and god I love that man

I have barely even started the video and I'm shocked. As a 24 y/o woman who has never been in a relationship I'd be SO THRILLED if I found a man who matched 65% let alone 80% - I assumed other women felt the same!

Wow this really changed the way I view my parents. It used to make me sad for them because I thought they had “settled” for less in life by not following their dreams. But now I have nothing but respect and admiration for them cause now I see that they did whatever they had to do to make sure my sister and I had a comfortable life. I’m mad that it took me watching a video from dudes I don’t even know for me to realize that 😂. Im gonna go thank my parents now.

At 29 and a single woman i have come to understand that COMPATABILITY is not hobbies but Values, Integrity and Morals. Those other things blend in naturally

Hobbies will fade, interests change. Values are deeply rooted in who we are. Plus, if you both like the same things, then there’s no variety. One of the best things is sharing things with someone who’s never seen them for the first time

I love this talk about settling. When I settled I think I wised up. I am blessed because I settled!! But not giving up or degrading myself. Contrary to what popular culture says you can’t have EVERYTHING you want.

My ex wife said she knew she 'found the one' after our first date. I moved to her home state to start a life. I have an undiagnosed chronic illness and it got worse during that time. I told her I can't have a kid yet, I need to focus on doctors and get better first. She separated from me with an email when I was visiting my parents. It was a nightmare and my self esteem as a man got me into that situation. Guys, don't push forward for what she wants because you're afraid you might lose her if you say not yet or no, you'll lose her anyway

I'll say this...if you're eliminating potential partner based on shoe and belt color combinations you aren't going to make it in a long-term marriage anyway. You will jump ship at the first rock you hit in your marriage and that will be it.

I LOVE THIS ONE! This talk made me reevaluate what the hell I am pursuing. Settling really has a bad connotation...................................but again this talk really brings clarity to what I need to do and that I should humble myself.

My husband has so many goofy things and his last girlfriend said he was too immature. I met him and he’s perfect even with his goofy things, the shows he watches, etc 😂 I could see he was kind, he was hardworking, focused on being better and achieving success. I knew he was everything I needed. I have things that complement him. The entire thing that men and women have to be like two peas in the pod is toxic. 17 years later and I can’t imagine my life without him.

This video reminded me of one of my favorite quotes. "A true relationship is two imperfect people refusing to give up on each other."

Aba and Preach had me fooled. Their chemistry so good I was convinced they were friends. TOP 10 ANIME BETRAYALS.

This made me reflect and I realize Never once has a partner told me “you’ve changed” and I think it’s because never once have I tried to get someone by tricking them or going extra for them… I always found someone when i lease expect it and The guys I’ve been with have been attracted to my character when I didn’t even know they were looking and that feels good

You guys are awesome! I thought my wife and I were the only ones who thought this way anymore. We look to the left and to the right, see and hear people making these statements and we find out they are just shallow. We thought no one thinks deep anymore. we thought we were just too old-fashioned. I'm glad you have a platform that allows you to spread these ideas. It is needed so desperately in the world community.

I married the Austin Powers guy. He still does weird voices 15 years later. It’s not my favorite trait of his, but he’s got lots of other good traits. He’s kind, loving, supportive of *everything* I do. He’s an awesome dad. He’s my rock. If you can’t prioritize the truly important aspects of your partner’s character, you aren’t ready to be in a committed relationship.

“I think I’m boring” *no, you’re just not complicated* My kinda guy.

This help me appreciate my relationship, when we first got together I would always complain and nit pick. But nobody is perfect and I would rather deal with a guy that will rather take the time out of his day to learn how to love me and give me grace then to be with a guy that doesn’t care and doesn’t treat me the way that I should be treated.

Hi! Thanks for sharing. I was having some serious doubts and I made duaa and you guys literally came at the right time. I've seen this video before and I don't usually watch twice. But, today I did. May Allah bless you and helping keep my EGO in check. Ameen!!

My Fiancée is a successful attorney that never dated the “blue collar, jeans and T-shirt” kind of guy like myself..She finally got tired of failed relationships with men of status, and decided to take a chance on something different. She took a chance on me and now loves theme parks, Marvel movies, Anime, playing video games, Harry Potter, reading and watching Science fiction. We now debate which is better Star Trek or Star Wars..Lol. She admitted she’s never been happier...Her sister and friends are all divorced and single due to unrealistic expectations and chasing “the Unicorn” aka perfect guy that doesn’t exist and now they continuously hate on our relationship, resulting my fiancée limiting her associations with them. A lot of women need to get out of their own way.

You can't just have shared interests or hobbies. You need shared and compatible values.

My one year wedding anniversary today (11 Sep 22)… crazy that this video popped up. It’s truly not easy but what ive learned so far is, you and your person have to put the self aside and focus on the unit. Do not tell things to people before you tell your person. Be patient and forgiving with your person and yourself because both of you will mess up things, but it’s always about the unit. Anyway, I’m bout to go prep the kitchen so wife can get lunch ready. Love.

I am so glad you two have met and decided to work together. Listening to you guys have made me think about a lot of things in my life, including selfishness. Thank you, for being a spark of wisdom in this insane world.

Been married soon to be 44 yrs . It is WORK !

"People get mad that we're not friends." "Watching your dad is great and I want to be like him when I get older." "My dad says you can come over to the house whenever you want." Ya'll have a definition of "not friends" that I'm struggling to wrap my head around. ;)

Absolutely true! Everyone needs to take this to heart about everything in life really. You’ll have more genuine and fulfilling experiences if do.

I don't usually leave comments, but I had to for this one. I'm about to be 18 or so, but I've always wanted to raise a healthy family of my own someday, and that's been my long term goal for as long as I can remember. I grew up in a single mother household, and even though I try to be pragmatic about my expectations in marriage, hearing that question about if I would take someone that met 80% of my desires, or just how much commitment matters really hit me. I'd understood this on a decent level maybe, but now I'm really thinking about if I know what I want to sign up for. I still want a marriage and a family. But I don't think I fully comprehend what that marriage would have meant. I will try to understand. Thank you for this video. Your words might just have created a wonderful family in the years to come.

The annoying thing I've noticed about some of the one who supposedly "settle" is that they don't actually do that at all. They slowly try to change their partners into their perfect man

"No race can truly prosper until it learns that there is just as much dignity in tilling a field as in writing a poem." - Booker T. Washington

I have watched so many videos from this duo since I first heard they months ago, so much knowledge and entertainment. This video is my fav, love the way they appreciate each other's authenticity

This video helped me a lot. Being okay with differences, remembering the bottom line and prioritizing more than feeling we “need to be the same” or “feel love all the time” your video was way more than just this for me but thank you for expanding as far as you both did on this topic.

Modern Relationships: "We are together because we watch the same shows." Real Life: "The Seasons are ending, the shows' contracts ran out." Modern Relationships: " Wait, why are we together again?"

In 1997 there were 4 of my guy friends in a circle. One profoundly said "it's interesting how I think all of y'all are weird(we all feel the same way towards each other) and yet we get along."

You guys dropped some of the most beautiful bars I’ve ever heard. I’m definitely saving this video. Great reminders and philosophy for life 🥹

Very real, very deep message in this video (from both the vid and your insights). I wasn't prepared for this depth when I clicked on this. I'm really happy it popped up on my feed

80% is a grade letter of a B. That's not bad when you consider it's better to pass the class with a B average than to drop out because you didn't get 99% on everything.

My husband and I are the complete opposites. Literally the only thing we have in common are our morals and values. He does crazy extroverted things, while I’m happy to just stay home. We respect the differences and don’t try to make the other be like us.

I am a 50 yr old woman and I have always looked for a man with honesty,, kindness, a sense of humor, integrity, and I look at the way he treats others. I have settled once because I didn't think I was worth enough to get everything I wanted. I am now with the man of my dreams and very happy. We are going onto 10 years now.

I love this serious chill conversation. Deep. Meaningful. Please do them more often guys

The funny ones are when she can formulate an entire list of qualities a man must have to please her, but she doesn’t even attempt to be the kind of woman that man wants.

My first job was at a prestigious firm. BUT they had a lot of exploitative practices. I was unhappy. I applied for a different job. This other place doesn't have a renowned reputation but they are decent people, they respect me and they value what I bring to the table, they even pay me way more than the other place after I showed them what I am worth. I cried a lot when i left the prestigious firm, and everybody told me that I would ruin my career. Except for my parents. My parents told me that they raised no coward who would be slaved away by a corporation. Settling for the not-prestigious job has been my best move ever. I love my job because I know that my effort is worth it.

Bro this episode really made me think on a lot things I can do to improve on my marriage… shiiiiiii preach it! God bless y’all keep it up

Can't appreciate how much of a heads up this is. Thanks for sharing

The marriage begins when the honeymoon ends. But the toughest conversations should be happening before an engagement ring is brought or the wedding day.

Western culture is individualistic and this tendency to focus on oneself is not suitable for relationships and marriage. People are just too selfish for marriage.

I needed this video so much… thank you guys so much for this! Struggle with this exact issue.

Man I’ve been to so many marriage retreats and seminars even before my wife and I were married and no we don’t have a bunch of crazy problems we just think it’s good to do because we’re constantly working on our ever evolving relationship. And never had anyone said that marriage is not a status my pastor said that marriage isn’t a contract and when someone doesn’t check everything in the list it’s time to terminate the contract because it went against the contract. Truly blew my mind when you said that. Because even when you don’t try or don’t think that way you do wear your marriage like a status and I think more so for women than men. But wow totally changed my brain 😂

If she’s being that picky about my black shoes and brown belt, then she’s doing me a favor by not agreeing to a second date 👍