If a surgeon is having a mental breakdown right before surgery, I would hope that surgeon would skip that operation and have another surgeon step in. I don’t want someone who isn’t completely there to operate on a person. It’s as simple as that.
Great analogy. The same people who would say that someone with mental issues should just dig deep to complete their task would not like a Surgeon that's having a mental breakdown working on them. A lot of people don't understand something until it affects them.
Man when Aba said how many people have died from a broken leg vs how many people have died from mental health, it hit home. I appreciate sensible people like Aba and Preach
nice one, this will be the new norm, most people I adore and admire have been going through alot but they stay strong and I am very happy about that, they've me to push on even in my weak times.
Don't worry. They are hearing it. It's getting to be a pretty big topic on RU-vid right now, and it's to the point where big names, CEOS, and shit are responding with their own videos to try and convince people that they are important, irreplaceable, and other lies to keep you working in toxic environments.
I just got a 6 figure job a month ago and I immediately told my husband, who's been miserable at his job for months, that he can quit now. I've seen what this job is doing to my husband's mental health, and therefore to our family and this is NOT what I want for him, for us. I commend him, he's been patient, a great professional, he's held it together for so long. But enough is enough, I'll always have his back. I told him to go the next day and quit on the spot.
As an Afghan Vet, there are many different reasons people can get PTSD. An Engineer in the bombsquad may need to go defuse an IED (fuck that noise) after watching his best mate get blown to pieces days before. Then has nightmares every night for the rest of his life. I dont imagine most western civilians to understand but when you talk shit about PTSD it shows that you probably dont understand how life can be very hard. Especially for Afghan civilians that go through it everyday. Peace A&P.
@@lovinmclovin5290 you’re a goof cuz he wasn’t comparing the two, he was using it as an example of how mental health could be even more dangerous when not taken seriously especially if you’re job requires you to put your life on the line along with others
The fact that 'triggered' has been co-opted by a bunch of unemployable professional victims who cry if the wind blows due east has made this problem 1000X worse.
I have PTSD, but not from being in the military. However, I've been through some pretty traumatic stuff. I've been diagnosed with it by professionals . It's not fun having this and it's shitty when people don't understand.
Semi personal story. While I was in the military, a drinking buddy of mine was regaling us with his not so glorious stories of his 5 deployments. He had medals for each one. Then we got our deployment orders. He begged the NCO to put him on "rear D" (for non military types, that is rear defense where the person would stay back at base and not be taken to the combat areas). The NCO refused stating his expertise in the combat situation. He stated his mental health was too poor to go again. A couple days later, that same NCO told him that the first Sargeant denied the his request saying, "if he stayed behind he would be a 'quiter'". He stabbed his NCO with a combat knife. The guy and the NCO had drinks the night before our orders came in. They were close and he was willing to sacrifice his military career, his friendship with this guy, and his freedom all to not go. His mental health was really Shakey and noone would listen. the NCO was treated and recovered, and he was court martialed but he got off of the charges because the (still injured) NCO he stabbed was a character witness for him. He did get discharged based on mental stability but he couldn't function in society. He took his own life 2 years after discharge. I have seen mental health being taken for granted in many circumstances, but it hurts me to think of him still to this day even though that was in 2005.
I am a retired Corpsman(8404) 21 years I saw the same kind of things, this is par for the course in the Military. It's not that they don't care ( they don't) but we are just tools products to use and if we break so be it. I can go over to NHSD across the street to the park and find some of my old shipmates mentally, physically and almost always emotionally broken. The military definitely takes mental health for granted they rather kick you out that treat it, sometimes for obvious reason and sometimes for not so obvious reasons.
Simone was passing a kidney stone while she was competing in World competition. People have been making child abuse jokes at her expense. All they care about is her being a source of entertainment that they can profit from.
@@anthonyfletcher8053 the word you are looking for is there; and yes there is always a better option, but I have to ask you wtf are you even getting at???
@@Tjm416 ah yes! Thank you for the correction. People wouldn’t have understood my question otherwise 😁 My point is people, as of recently, have been unwarrantedly bashing capitalism like crazy but offer no solutions. My question is literal.. is their... sorry there a better option..?
This video isn't solely about PTSD & Soldiers. This is about our "GRIND THROUGH IT" attitude surrounding mental health issues in general. People are quick to label those alive today with depression or other issues as soft or quitters or cowards looking for a way out. Keep in mind that these kinds of phrases used to be used on veterans all the time. Depression... Self Deletion, Mental issues. They were always around, we just never talked about it and now that folks are people are just like "WHOA... WHERE IS THIS COMING FROM.. ALL THESE PEOPLE. THEY MUST BE FAKING". Yeah folks are faking it soo hard, thats why self deletions are reaching record highs. Just because you cant see it, doesnt mean they arent suffering from it. Im not asking you to believe it, you dont have to believe in something oyu dont see. BUT WHY ACTIVELY SHAME OR DISBELIEVE SOMETHING YOU HAVE NO INFORMATION ON. You could be injured and folks may not be able to see it including doctors, that doesnt lessen your physical hurt. You wouldnt want folks labeling you for pain that they cant see and this happens all the time. Lets be mindful that this is their body, their mind and if they say they are suffering only they really know so lets not make their situation potentially worse with callous words.
That guy is a ignorant fool. You can't comprehend what he doesn't know, so he justifies it with his ignorance and lack of critical thinking or knowledge. Only, when he experience it then he would understand!
You know what I’m very happy and grateful that I read this at the start, it helps put you in a different mind set and allows you to broaden YOUR knowledge. Imma Read the comment From Aba and Preach at the start know instead of the beginning.
The entire thing was because she was being praised as a hero for it instead of the people who kept going the spotlight was on her instead of the people competing is that fair? She was being called a hero no she is not it was disappointing she backed out but she is NOT a f ing hero all these people coming up with excuses for her saying stuff she never said originally which did NOT help its warranted criticism ps I was a paramedic for a few years I've seen some bad ish i worked through my problems through the proper channels I know not everyone is the same but elevating these types of people is wrong
I just want to say thank you for using your platform to speak on this issue. No matter the viewpoint on it, it just needs to be discussed openly. If we keep normalizing the conversation, us veterans and others suffering from PTSD can get the help they truly need and DESERVE. Just...thank you. Won't even entertain the gentleman stating they're "quitters." I want to focus on the fact that you guys have used a very large platform with tons of diverse viewers to shed light on a very serious subject.
Gymnasts are out there doing crazy feats that could easily kill them if they land wrong. You have GOT to have your head in the game for that. Good on her for recognizing it.
Being a kid from an immigrant mother, some people don't understand how hard it was to try and actually open up and tell them things we were dealing with. I tried telling my mother I was dealing with depression in my 20's. She told me I was imagining it and needed God. I tried taking my life while dealing with it. I overcame it, but damn when there are people who think people dealing with mental health is fake, it triggers me.
Just wanna say, I'm a white boy & had an identical experience with my own parents, but I was still a minor. They told me how I felt wasn't true. I know mental health is talked about more in white countries, but that doesn't mean the people & culture have really moved up to match it. It's about to be 10 years since I first told them that, & I'm about to try and tell them again.
My mom's grandparents came from Germany in the 1940s when ww2 was going strong. My mom told me she often tried to talk to her mom but the German way of suck it up was embedded in her. It's good to see that your parents way of dealing with depression didn't trickle down to you.
I've seen "quitter" used to manipulate people into staying in abusive relationships. Sometimes the hardest thing to do is quit and walk away. That takes courage. And the right thing to do is to set boundaries and sometimes that means saying no, quitting and walking away.
[I've heard it joked that AA is for quitters! But in all seriousness, introspection and brutal self-honesty is why most seek escapism. Accountability and responsibility is the result of a person with real love for others, and themselves. Toxic knows no gender, and exiting stage left is self-care!✌🏼💊]
In the case of the black community, it's not even just always feeling the need to be strong. It's being indoctrinated into certain beliefs such as, "black people don't go to therapy, they go to church." I remember spouting that nonsense in my teenage years...that's beyond damaging. I have no problem with religion, and I believe in God but sometimes religion mixed with untreated mental issues can do more harm than good.
If you’re hearing voices you’re schizophrenic If you label that voice god, you’re a prophet It’s not surprising the church or other organised religions can mask a lot of this stuff
@@marlonthomas8042 actually alot of the time it's not actual voices, rather signs or signals often seen by those that want to see and or "hear" it. It's an extremely dangerous mentality and doctrine to act as if those that claim they feel or see or hear what they are technically forcing a feeling they're pushing so hard to feel as if they are crazy. It doesn't necessarily make them crazy for believing what they believe in, especially when majority of people use that as an escape. Just as people imagine they're on vacation "feeling" what they're thinking of like the sun, or the beach, people feel their own happiness and or escapes.
IMO, church CAN help ppl, BUT mental health is important. Don't you think God made man see how these ppl are suffering and provided ppl who can help them? I like to believe God provides a way for us to better ourselves and to care for others. If Jonas Salk had not been born would we have the polio vaccine? Sorry, I have a strange way of thinking.
This is not just a “black community” thing. To suggest that only black ppl have a lack of empathy and understanding when it comes to mental health, is absolutely ignorant. There were plenty of white ppl who dismissed Simone Biles. Stop spreading these stereotypes that are based on anecdotal experiences.
@@NoMetsNoNetsNoJets She didn’t say it was just a black community thing my guy.🤦🏾”In the case of the black community” is what she said. It’s a difference.
If you’re a gymnast and you are suffering from mental health issues, you have no business competing , not because it hurts the team but because you don’t want to end up with a broken neck and live the rest of your life in a chair or worse. She did the right thing. Kudos to her.
Simone doesn't owe anything to anyone. She's proven she's the best and backing out doesn't make her any less of a champion. Gymnastics is easily one of the most dangerous sports out there. You're flying through the air upside down and one mis step you could easily snap your neck and end your life. I don't blame her at all for not participating. She's earned her gold. It pisses me off when people who've never played a sport let alone gymnastics or have gone through the same amount of pressure someone like Simone has gone through say she's a quitter.
I had a teacher who told me when her brother came back from Vietnam. Whenever he enters a room and hear typewriters clicking. It reminded him of machine gun fire. He will proceed to jump behind a couch and ask everyone in the room to get cover. The same when on bin day when he heard metal bins clang . It will remind him of artillery setting off. Poor soul . War changes people immensely. Soldiers are humans. This was in Australia
My friend's father can't listen to trucks because it reminds of him instantly of humvees in Afghanistan. He just starts shaking and trying to leave immediately. He had to move out of the country to get away from it.
I literally know a dude who went to a psych ward for telling somebody he tried to kill himself. A single fucking week later he shot himself on gun watch because nobody believed him.
Thank you for your service man! We glorify war too much these days but no one should have to go through that. The sacrifices that alot of people made should be the reason why.
Until someone has been behind that line brotha in the red zone they won’t understand it. The military is a factory. They don’t give a damn about the soldiers, just some ibuprofen 800 and they send you back out there. Now I can say this shorty should have said before even stepping out there that I’m not G2G coach. Don’t put me in the game. I can’t go into the RZ in the middle of theater and say nah I’m good. At that point your SL might call you a traitor. Mental health is real, so gotta get the help before it’s too late
I tried to self-delete this last week. I drank a lot and took 56 25mg phenobarbital pills and ended up in the hospital and in the psych ward for 3 days. Self-delete is NO JOKE. Please don't resort to it. There's always something to live for. Me, personally, I have my dogs and family. I fucked up and now I know I'm never going to try to do that to myself again. Please try to keep your mental health well.
Honestly listening to the other guys opinion on mental health issues made me cry. I felt so invalidated. A lot of us didn't know what we would experience over there. I've lost way to many of my brothers from the military to their demons because of the negative stereotype given. As infantrymen we were told to always put the mission first and that turned a lot of us into robots.( We lost 11 guys on deployment. Never forgotten and always missed) Now 10 years down the line I'm trying to tackle my own demons and it's so so hard. Thank you guys so much for standing up and shining a light on mental health.
It’s also important to recognize “Superwoman” syndrome that Black women are pressured to keep up with from Society. You see it in medicine with practitioners not acknowledging BW’s pain and think they are exaggerating or feel less pain than anyone else. You see it in always thinking that BW can push through pain, stress etc and should because it is what is expected of a “Strong Black woman”. You can take care of everything everyone etc.
As a Black woman I hate this assumption. We cry, feel pain, and go through struggles just like anyone else. Let Black girls and women be soft and vulnerable in life, we can't be strong 24/7 otherwise we'll crumble.
@@UmightBwrong i recognize your opinion. As i stated i am not speaking on the pressures of BW AND BM. Only the women. My statement was an additional pressure BW feel from society along with our culture not emphasizing mental health issues and care, hell tbh any MEDICAL CARE because of WARRANTED MISTRUST, let alone the lack of luxury. Preach already made that point about the historical context; i am speaking on another pressure. A pressure where in historically broken homes from slavery and systemic imprisonment BW make a way out of no way, and it is celebrated/ accepted. But they are not giving time to grieve or be lax etc, because they should be able to work 3jobs and take care of 6 kids and go to school as an example. It is seen when medical professionals ignore BW pain seeing it as exaggeration, and historically in how BW were experimented on without anesthesia because they were “stronger” and felt less. It is real. It is from “SOCIETY”/our culture (by definition society means any ordered community)as well. In fact a lot of mental health issues are derived from people trying to withstand the pressure of society and keep up with the thinking of the masses or becoming a victim for following suit. So let’s not foolishly disregard that. BW and BM have different struggles although from the same root. For Simone as a BW, my experience as a BW and I’m sure she has felt the same “Superwoman” Pressure from others and herself at times. And it shouldn’t be ignored because of more accepted answer of BPpl just don’t do mental health because of the past. There are many folds and aspects to this issue.
@@terrim.9002 "historically broken homes from slavery and systematic imprisonment" How do black homes fall apart precipitously only from the 1960s onwards, alongside (but in greater measures than) every other demographic?
@seg162 crack was being pushed into black neighborhoods. Interesting when you look into what groups were working with the cartel and profiting off the drug trade.
I’m glad that I’ve found this video. I was sixteen when I left my home country by myself to come to Canada. Nothing went according to plan and I found myself alone and fighting to survive. New country, new culture, new language. Working full time, going to school full time. No friends and away from all my family. After i got through high school and was mid Cégep, I was waiting for the metro at Montmorency station when I found myself calculating where I should place myself to guarantee an instant death if I decided to jump in front the metro car. I got so frightened that I went back to the Cégep and asked to see a psychologist as soon as possible. I’m glad to this day that I didn’t shy away from asking for help.
This man really triggers me, BRUH!!, as a British Soldier myself this is a serious topic, 1 year ago we had a Soldier shoot himself after finishing his guard duty, went straight in to the shower room and took himself out. We don't know why he chose to do that, sad.
Do you find that the gallows humour that soldiers have can mask a lot of these issues? Like “if I get one more of these duties I’m gonna off myself” or “if I have one more squaddie get shit I might as well do myself” So because people say this it’s never taken seriously because it’s equivalent to “if you serve me one more warm beer I’m killing everyone” but if you were an accountant with firearms licences and said that people would intervene?
One of the most common causes of death for men in this country is suicide and its def a lot higher for those in service, you go through so much like :/
This upset me so much. I have an incredibly close friend who's been dispatched overseas in the military, and she's struggling with the mental after all this time. I told her to get discharged but she didn't like the idea of being discharged over mental health. She won't put her health and wellbeing first and the exact reason is because of people like this and it enrages me because she's so important to me but I'm powerless to do anything.
These people say “but they still came back”. That right there is the problem. They’re viewing ‘coming back’ as a default positive. As Aba said - yeah, Durant came back… and blew out his Achilles! *HE SHOULDN’T HAVE COME BACK! THAT WAS THE WRONG DECISION.*
Sometimes when people say “we live in a sensitive society now” I do agree because a lot of people are abusing that fact. However, we are now in a better time and place in the world where many issues can be talked about now, instead of swept under the rug. Do we need a better balance ? Absolutely. Should we treat everyone as quitters or crybabies when they put themselves first ? No.
Your brain is the most important organ in the human body. It literally tells your body what to do. Simone Biles is literally using her brain to tell her body to defy gravity so many ways with technique and minute calculations. If something goes wrong it can lead to serious injuries. Shes not a quiter shes actually brilliant.
Nah, she's a quitter. She could have decided that before she got to Japan, before she was not just quitting for herself, but for her team as well. All the people she could have been inspiration for. Think the Miracle on Ice folks were in perfect mental standing that whole time? Plus, as a person who was an athlete and did and still do deal with many mental health issues, up to and including PTSD. Quitting is the absolute worst thing you could do for yourself in about 99/100 situations People do that stuff and they go into the comfortable little hole of safety. The next time the choice is there to have to try and get through something or just quit. The quitting is that much easier. Until you're not even trying anymore. Because why? Then stay there until they figure out how to find some help and pull THEMSELVES out of it. Or not. The Military PTSD example they used I think is a horrible analogy. It's not the same at all. That's talking about a person trained to be ready to kill at the drop of a hat, put in a place where they could be killed. Having to actually kill someone...that's a much different situation. And being discharged isn't quitting. I think better would be someone at work starting a project with some people, doing most of it, getting to the very end and then saying, "You know, I actually can't do this. Good luck." and bouncing
@@eldiboblo923 well u take her shoes ok go win a medal for your country then get ur self ready for the next olympics and get out there win a medal .........................................................................................................................oh wait u will never even attempt it because ur too soft and u know u will fail before you even try
When he said "her mind wasn't hurt, it's a physical sport" I thought of just this. Literally everything physical is connected to the brain and the mind.
👆👆👆👆 EXACTLY!!!!!! People act like the brain doesn’t have a significant role in the different athletic performances her body does. If the brain isn’t right you CANNOT perform.
Probably my favorite video from Aba and Preach as of yet. Thanks for this Aba and Preach - I felt like my feelings were validated. This means a lot for people like me who can’t help but be hard on themselves - we wish weren’t and it’s easier said than done.
She’s an olympian who’s has worked her whole young life and sacrificed to be an olympian. I don’t get why people think it’s healthy to work ourselves to death! Sometimes it’s time to tap out and heal.
Sometimes it’s just what you have to do to survive. Everyone doesn’t have the luxury to cry mental health. You’d better fix it before you show up to work, push through, or you can find another job that cares but probably pays less
@@Tjm416 Nobody is saying to not work hard or don't make sacrifice to survive or reach your goals. But we need to learn when to take a break to reset the pressure. You won't be able to enjoy these hard work and sacrifices if you are dead or unable to function properly. Ex: When lifting weight, we do a set, take a break then come back to it. We don't do reps until our body is injured. We listen to the signals our body send us and act accordingly. We should apply the same logic to our brain/mental health.
If I'm in a war zone with the military, I don't want the guy who is meant to have my back to have mental health issues. Best thing he can do is remove himself. He can still hold his head up.
When the mind isn't functioning properly the body doesn't function properly. Simone Biles literally had an episode midair. If she were a lesser athlete she would've probably ended up landing incorrectly and been taken out on a stretcher. If a soldier has mental issues that soldier will be a liability to themself and their fellow soldiers. You can't discount someone's health because something isn't apparent.
I feel like since people always label her as the “perfect gymnast” she can’t ever mess up, which is not true. She’s still human, she will make mistakes like the rest of us. I just think people tend to forget that since we put her on top of this pedestal (I’m not saying she doesn’t deserve that title)
This video is important. I appreciate the breakdown y’all did. This was needed! As an army vet to another thank you abba. And preach you’re awesome and being just as supportive if not more. People need to know ptsd doesn’t just stop with vets, anybody can be a victim of this mindset.
My sister cofounded the Friendship force years ago with her friend. As time went on, new management came in and started bringing up new ways of completing tasks and brought electronics and computers into the mix of things. My sister was ousted by a vote of her peers and lost everything. For years, she struggled with finding something else to do with her life….it was all she knew. She would give you the shirt off her back and always had a smile. Always kept herself up and was beautiful. In 2002, she gave away all her belongings to the poor, sold her house and gave the money to charity. She went to church one last time to ask for forgiveness…..got a call one day while I was in school. She put a gun to her head and pulled the trigger. Never knew she was sad, never knew her inner struggles because she “looked” happy. Point is, you never know what struggles someone is going through on the inside because they hide it so well on the outside
I am so sorry for your loss my friend 😞 it is a horrible thing to experience. I lost my sister the same way. Except the back story is different. Losing a sibling is like losing a huge part of yourself as well. I’ll pray for you and your sister. God bless!
Oh my not the news you want too hear! Your sister started a successful foundation she did great things while she was and that needs too be acknowledged and not skipped over. If only.... Prayers too you and your family And your sister legendary accomplishments. 💜🌷🙏💎
Very true. Some people just want people with mental disorders or disabilities to constantly look "disabled" and if you don't, you're fine. I had to leave a job years ago due to a PTSD relapse and it was really hard to come to that decision, but I was getting memory lapses and I knew I could slip up and someone could get hurt due to my lapses. I wouldn't call myself or anyone in a position like that "a quitter". I never heard about mental illness being ignored or hidden in black American communities (I'm a white Aussie), but that's terrible. I hope people talk about it more and things get better. That feeling of shame when you try to hide this stuff but people start to notice something is "off" about you is terrible.
My mom is that kind of Christian who believes that God and the power of prayer will fix everything, yet she does very little to nothing herself to fix a situation. Now as an almost 30 year old man I realize that a lot of my anger comes from her and that mentality.
I think he was confused on the difference between quitting and a quitter, I feel calling someone a quitter is a characteristic trait that carries on about a person. It’s obvious if you leave something you “quit” because by definition that means “to leave” but to assassinate someone’s whole character over a singular event is unfair, if Simone was a “quitter” she would’ve never made it this far If a soldier was a “quitter” he wouldn’t make it past basic training but hey these just my initial thoughts let’s tune into this great content📈🔥
"Her mind wasn't hurt" - That's gaslighting as well. Whoever this guy is, he's so ignorant. Watch out for people who deny your and others' experience. Just stay away from them. Also, quitting is not always a bad thing. Thanks for talking on this Aba and Preach!
How is he "gaslighting" and not just disagreeing or being wrong? This appropriation of psyche and abuse language to apply to any and all situations is pretty inappropriate IMO.
I appreciate you guys more and more every video. I just had this exact conversation with one of my coworkers. She always busts her ass and had a ton of health problems. I told her she needs to slow down and make herself a priority because the job is not gonna do it for her. Working hard, testing your mettle, growing through pain is fine, but breaking yourself, sacrificing yourself to a faceless entity that doesn’t care about you is pointless and ultimately futile. Simone would have hurt herself and in a month she’d be forgotten, my coworker would hurt herself and in a week be replaced.
I liked the viewpoint you made on different kinds of struggles. It hadn't clicked until then how the struggles now aren't as materialistic but more existentialist. Made me have more compassion for mental struggles. It's still my default to think that because it's mental you can push trough it more so than a physical issue but I'm starting to see that as with playing with a broken leg can cause more harm in the long run. Continuing with a "broken" brain can too. Also just to add to the conversation, it's not because you don't deal with something that it doesn't exist.
congrats on having a "happy life" my buddy from the Corps put a shotgun in his mouth and I never knew he was going through anything. He was physically tougher than I. I cried while meeting his family after his death and we both never figured out how he got to that point. We aren't all built the same. Things we come across in life, effect us differently. I think about taking my life and realize it takes more balls to do so. Selfish or not, that kind of pain must be unbearable.
@@phoenixjones7191hardest part is wondering why I am not as far gone, going through the same things. am I the fucked up one or has it not hit me yet. Suicide makes you wonder. Am I stronger or weaker. Or less Empathetic. All I know is that in the last few years we have lost more to suicide that have served than in combat.
@@claytonkeever2992 it’s non of the above my guy. It’s compound and complex. Stay up and take care of yourself and those you hold dear. Bring an umbrella but don’t hold it alone
@@claytonkeever2992 anytime brother. Loss hurts everyone and it’s deep. If you need to then speak to someone. If at least you have my random ass we can pm but I’m tired of seeing it too and civvies will never understand the kind of rates you’re actually talking about..
I agree 💯. The lack of Mental health awareness in the diaspora makes me feel saddened. I remember watching your channel at a time I was experiencing burnout, CPTSD, high codependency and narcissistic traits, lost multiple jobs, and relationships, and addiction issues with drugs and sex, definitely was in psychosis in my opinion 🤦🏾. 8 years later, I'm in therapy, reflecting, gaining more insight into my old behaviours and hoping that I'm not gonna be labelled a narcissist by clinical experts 😵💫. I have a mission to build with folks that create awareness on these issues. I'm a student of counselling and aim to be a trauma-informed life coach and stay on my mission. The most important thing is to always balance my health and wellness over anything. I want to Love and build with family members that are willing to continue this life journey with me and create a solid foundation for a family. I still have a long way to go. However, this type of talk reminds me of the narcissistic abuse I remember experiencing 🤦🏾. Consider this message as a warning about your mental health and attitude. 🤔 peace, and love to you and your family. 🤲🏾🌱🤲🏾
Thank you for this. I ended a friendship because he called me a bitch and couldn’t understand that I have PTSD getting out the military and having psychological and psychological affects that are beyond my control. You can’t control your body’s reaction to trauma.
My mental health got so bad that I quit my job of 8 years. Best decision ever. I didn’t want to be that quitter. But I also didn’t want to suffer anymore. I took time for myself and am working on feeing better. Mental health is very important, never let anyone tell you it isn’t. Take care of yourselves ❤️
I relate to this. Ive been a ballet dancer for three years but right now I’m taking a long break because I was battling with depression and suicidal thoughts years prior. At first I didn’t want to because my parents didn’t believe that I was depressed but I got to the point where I didn’t care because I knew one day I was gonna hurt myself. If you need help you deserve to get it 😊
Quitting on things that aren't you isn't a "quitters" mentality. You "quit" on yourself for 8 years. You owe nothing to anything external of yourself. If it doesn't serve you get rid of it. Aside from obvious selective situations you should be living and building for your self.
As someone who ignored my mental health for years only to have a mental breakdown causing seizures and suicidal ideations, I finally got help. I was diagnosed with ptsd & bipolar 1 and am now disabled because I couldn't go on with life the way it was. You're brain is the most important organ, don't ignore it. This video is so important.
As my dad is a Desert Storm Veteran , I find it very triggering to hear him say people with trauma (mostly mentally) are cowards for giving up. My father was very strong and was in the army for 25 years and now thankfully he's getting help. People like this are very ignorant and forget mental problems are a very real thing. It's not a little thing people choose to do to gain sympathy especially considering certain circumstances. edit: my dad is 100% mentally disabled due to his PTSD and takes alot of meds to cope with his issues. it doesnt make him weak for getting help. it's more honorable of a soldier to leave the military due to their trauma and deeper issues than to risk others' lives and theirs.
Not just vets man, some of us came from neighborhoods in the 80s and 90s that were war zones, and learned quickly that bark and bite are two totally different things.
I was in a job for 2 months, I was alienated, had multiple mental breakdowns, was verbally abused. I decided to leave, and instead of respecting my decision, I was gaslighted. Always choose yourself and your wellbeing over anything anyone says. Doesn’t make you a quitter, it makes you human.
This is such an important video. Thanks for talking about this. I don't always agree with everything you guys say, but when you're spot-on, you guys are right on the money. All of his is so important and so true and needs to be said.
Ik I'm the late here, but I can't help but talk about this thing that still irritates me years later. When I was HS I was also in a early college program for cyber security. I was rlly struggling in some of my classes and I was realizing I can't be putting 100% effort in football as I used to bc of this situation. I gave up my starting spot, I willingly sat on the bench for a majority of the season so that when I catch back up in college, I will be the best I could in football. Some of my coaches supported me and some others did not like me after that and called me a quiter. When that time came that I was ready to be fully focused on football I put my heart and soul into the game and in practice I was doing great, but my coaches weren't even giving me some of my minutes back(I would understandable not giving me my starting spot, but minutes to me was crazy). I go to ask my coach asking hey, I'm playing great in practice, I'm caught back up in college, can I get some of my minutes back? They would constantly shrug me off and eventually during a game when we were up by 30 POINTS and I'm asking to get in my coach tells me to stop asking, stop being selfish, and support your teammates. I was shocked he was calling me selfish when I literally gave up MY spot and MY minutes bc I knew I wasn't in the right mindset to be in that position. And he had the nerve to tell me to support my team when I didn't miss a single game or practice no matter the predicament I was in while your "star" favorite players are missing 3 practices a week. I played for this team for 4 years started in 3 of 4 years, helped and taught some of the players who are now in starting varsity. And this coach who just got hired the year this happend is calling me selfish and saying im not supporting the team. At that point I just left the team right when we made the playoffs(we were undefeated and never done this well in decades) I didn't go to the practices and I didn't go to the round 1 playoff game. My team lost by a mile and yet even tho I probably should be happy bc they got the karma they deserved I still feel bad and I feel like I lost with my team.
I commend you Aba on continuing the discussion with that guy. I would've ended it. "Simone let down her country." Yo... I'm good, Simone aint hurt me by deciding take that much needed break with the Olympics. Ppl need to respect other ppls decisions and focus on themselves. That beehive mentality is real 🙄. There's bigger things to worry about.
Exactly! We don't get anything from her being in the Olympics so we aren't hurting when she decides to take a break! Most people only remember her during Olympic season anyway so they need to stop acting butthurt.
@@Inspirayetion True, it's amazing how they responded to her taking that moment to herself. She has serious things going on with her from the abuse to her brother charges. Who knows what else she's dealing with. Most ppl need a tall glass of stfu.
Not to mention she was being sexually assaulted by a former coach and was not protected by the gymnastics community or the public. She owes the country nothing. And as far as I'm concerned any support that black people show this country should be out of personal choice not obligation.
Same with concussions in sports. I’ve had 4 diagnosed concussions but probably 6-7 in total from playing women’s soccer. You can’t see the concussion so people think you’re fine when you’re mentally foggy, hyper-emotional, nauseous, sometimes you develop depression. I had a really bad experience with my college assistant coach because of this. It’s a real problem and when people deny your reality it can make you feel even worse.
“When people deny your reality, it can make you feel worse.” That shit hit different. It resonated with me, for real. 💯 When you’re really goin through shit that people don’t understand & they tell you to just “get over it.”? Shit would piss me off, cause it’s like they tryna downplay your mental health. I hope you’re healing from it. Concussions are serious.
@@JohnGalt916 stop being a pussy and man the fuck up. ya wanted equality right? wellwhen this happens to a man what do people say: man the fuck up. so equality = man the fuck up stop being a pussy. cant handle the heat? get the fuck outta the kitchen.
I'm not sure if this will be read since I'm a year out, but this sentiment resonates with me. Live experiences can harden a person, this can be positive and negative at the same time. You look at things differently, but those that don't have the same experience will naturally disagree with you. I'll admit that I've been rather soft in the past, but being robbed at gunpoint multiple times in my life, running around as security within a mental health facility for 5 years, and seeing and sympathizing with individuals that have had a plethora of different and traumatizing experiences other than my own, I can say now that majority of the population is soft. Am I a hardened person now? Far from it, but I know that my ability to understand it and adjust to situations around me make it a lot easier to accept that some people need to get away from things of that nature. Mental health issues get downplayed and then we wonder why mass deletions happen so often, and the scale increases every time. The key problem is that since it's been played down so often, nobody knows how to handle it. My thought process ultimately comes to. "You wanna throw somebody with PTSD back out into the field. So are you willing to gather that platoon's families together to tell them they got wiped out when someone IN THEIR OWN SQUAD snapped and deleted them themselves, and then self deleted? No? Then STFU." Unfortunately it's exactly like you said. The success, confort and entertainment of the masses outweigh the health of the sacrifice. The cattle. The "not me". Anybody with any type of burnout from any place of employment can agree with this, yet once their entertainment or services become threatened they'll do a 180 immediately. I don't ask anything of anyone that I wouldn't be willing to do myself. To be perfectly honest, parents should know this whole heartedly. (well, responsible parents) Think about how much a parent sacrifices for their child. The child didn't ask to be here, they were a product of passion, but they have to have their struggles and survive like anybody else. Critically, parents want their children to have the best or have a comfortable life. So why can't we as people want that for other people. Forcing people to do things that they are currently incapable of doing is far from comfortable. So if you wanna discredit their struggles and problems, handle them yourself.
By far one of my fav videos. It’s crazy how some people can’t understand how important mental health is and that she respectfully pulled out because it means so much to her. Your sport can sometimes be your trigger and at some point it’s more mental than physical toughness needed. I’m a professional figure skater and I can’t commend Simone enough for shedding light on this issue. Thank you guys for always bringing it 👌🏾❤️
These ppl that call ppl quitters are the same ones that are the biggest cowards with no backbone and wouldn’t last a day in that other person shoes. All that talk coming from behind the screens and the comfort from your home.
Whenever I hear people say ignorant things like this I just know they have not been through anything messed up. The people I have met with PTSD are some of the strongest people I know because they went through some of the most messed up things I have ever heard and they are still fighting to move forward in spite of rarely getting the emotional support and a healthy environment to properly heal.
PTSD is a real thing. I'm just afraid people will use this as an excuse for many other things. If you need to take a break for a while to get your head back in the game that's fine. At least come back when you are ready.
Y'all some hypocrites, if this was a male athlete y'all would be clowning on them. If an NBA player went around acting as boastful and arrogant as she has then pulled out of the playoffs cause it was "to much pressure for their mental state" y'all would roast that fool.
Wow, you have a lot of patience Aba. You were talking to a brick wall... I can't! I would have disconnected. Mental health is so important. I always tell people "your health comes first".
Thank you brothers for covering this. I have that I served with people that have it. And people think it’s all bullshit. I had a friend’s dad that served during Vietnam. And every year on the Fourth of July when the fireworks would go off he would disappear for about a month because of the PTSD. I appreciate you guys really covering this
Gosh, this video hit me hard. Both my parents had the same mentality of having to go on in such tragic and harsh environments - Both parents lost their dads at the age of 8, both parents had big ass families with little to nothing to survive on, both parents had to physically torture themselves to get by. For my mom, this resulted into toxic positivity, and my dad, it resulted to anger issues. As for me? It didn't help that they were workaholics and inevitably neglected me from time to time, and knowing about their pasts at such a young age while having no one to really guide my thoughts, and when they do guide my thoughts, they weren't the best at guiding. That just lead to a lot of mental issues for me, and it probably didn't help that in the church we always went to, I had to look at kids my age, begging for spare change. That guilt and misguidance really fucked me up man. And while I'm not professionally diagnosed, I definitely asked myself the same things someone with depression had - And that extremely low self-esteem lead to a gross fetish of feeling hurt. Masochism is technically the word, and thank god I was found out and my parents enrolled me to exercise-related activities, because not only did exercise gave me the chance to be able to push myself in more reasonable ways, I realized just how fucked up I was. Like damn, I really thought I deserved to die at the age of 12. I know that sounds edgy, but remembering how overwhelming the guilt and how low my self-esteem was, I would never wish my most hated enemy to experience this as a child. It was that bad. Unfortunately still have the scars years later, but it's an honest reminder that I survived all that shit.
Not only is it a brave thing to risk others trying to ridicule you for making the right decision, it's also one of the most responsible things to do. Like Aba said sometimes you gotta step down so you don't compromise the rest of your team.
she didnt step down she cherry picked what she thought she could pull off. She came back and performed. She didnt leave. No soldier leaves the millitary because of his mental health then comes back to deploy a few days later.
I had a mental break while serving 5 years in the usaf, requested a discharge after almost putting someone's newborn child at risk after a misjudged call over their allergy test because of the stress I've tried to ignore with working. I get called a quitter and a disgrace for making the decision to not put other's lives at risk over my own inability to focus properly in the laboratory. You can say whatever you want, but rarely will someone choose to think over judging, it's the easier decision for most
Aye good on you for knowing when enough is enough. Putting others well-being ahead of what peers may think. I’m SF or “SecFo” as yall call us, and we’ve had too many members just push through and keep pushing without getting help and it leads to them taking their own lives.
I’ve been watching this video at least 100 times, merci beaucoup mes frères for speaking about this. Abas words has helped me thru a lot of dark days. I’m tired of having to describe my PTSD and get ish like “you need to stop being negative and maybe try yoga”. As a former nurse who’ve worked with victims of war and in a conflict zone… also lived a couple of years in a country who was in a civil war, so I’ve been having bad nightmares and panic attacks on a regular. Your video always helps me go from panic to just anxiety (which means a lot). So thanks guys 😊
I have a older friend who was in military. He's been out for two decades and still HAS shell-shock. During 4th of July celebrations he takes a few days off from work, because loud explosions would trigger him? He still hasn't gotten over being shot at or having bombs blow off by his head. He has a greater problems with loud noises to this day.
There's a vet who lives across the street from me... we've both talked about our PTSD, I never served, but I still have mine from growing up and dealing with things in my past... Idk how many times I've been talking to him out on the lawn and a truck passing on the highway backfires or a firework goes off and he does a front tumble straight into his hedges... I know he's going through shit, but after we always get a good laugh out of it lmao
As someone who has had to deal with mental health issues in the past and has seen it ruin other peoples' lives and their surrounding family members and social circles, I really appreciate this video and your advocacy for the importance on checking up on ourselves. I am tired of our generation being compared to past generations. Past generations struggled through wars and strife in hope of a more peaceful, SOFT world where we would not have to act tough and deal with the issues they dealt with. Past generations innovated technology and medicine so that we don't get killed off by things like the flu or measles. Our parents work hard to provide us a better future. I could go on and on but honestly the comparisons people make between the past and present are just silly and lack insight on humanity's purpose.
"If you're compromised, you're a liability." This is precisely why Simone should have left the event and came home. With that, I am happy for her. She was able to overcome and medal.
@Leptune Cannet It means that if you are distracted by some physical, mental, or emotional issue, you will not be able to focus on the task in front of you and can hurt yourself or others.
In chess you physically move the pieces, but you still need the mental to make the right moves. In gymnastics you have to physically move yourself, but to execute those movements at that high of a level, with so many people watching and so much pressure on you from being a previous olympic medalist, you need the mental to be as sharp as a japanese knife to perform.
Thank you soo much for this awareness. My son of 18 is on medication for psychoses and it is hard in my black and Christian community to understand. I can see the difference when he is not on medication. We are still praying for healing but alongside with medication.
I’m gonna be real and say that I thought she was a quitter but putting myself in her position I fully understood why she couldn’t. She went through a lot and I relate to that. I’m glad she didn’t go and instead put herself first and rested. It’s honestly not worth your mental health. Your mental health is more important than anything else. Great video guys. I totally understand your frustration. Some people need to be more compassionate.
Quitters are out in training, veterans are no quitters, they finished their training, PTSD is an injury wurse then a physical one. Greeting from A Dutch veteran Sergeant of Infantry(A lucky one cus I have come back the same as I went)
Just as Some people can cope well with pressure some people can cope well with mental issues, doesn't mean everyone does. You're right in the lucky part at the same time you can't be certain it didn't affect even though your not aware of it.
Some training facilities are bullshit and take very long to get through. I didn’t quit when I was freezing my ass off at -45 carrying my machine gun. I did waiting 2 years for my main course to start only for it to be interrupted by this COVID shit.
@@ldahmy my mission was 25 yrs ago. I know I'm fine. Not everyone is that lucky though. Not even people who where right by my side. Anyhow my point was that its wurse then physical injuries. Those are easy to cure mostly. Mental issues are mostly for life
Reminds me of that notorious incident in General Patton's career: the shell-shocked soldier in the field hospital, powerfully portrayed in the movie. "Send him to the front! You hear me? ... I'm not gonna have cowards in my army."
So I made like a general comment on this already. I’m a veteran and like PTSD will get veterans retired. We don’t get to decide to keep going, they will remove us. Retire us.
@@krissybee2484 thanks for serving 🙏🏼 PTSD I’ve never experienced, and it’s ridiculous how civilians think it’s “easy” to solve or take a pill and it’s gone. Especially soldiers seeing life changing situations that mentally f$cks them up.
I think that after he realized that he lost the argument, he simply took the defensive and stayed in attack mode. He simply will not admit to being wrong.
so damn true, some people don't know what the fuck they are taking about most of the time. reading about it, is hella different from experiencing it first hand... i have been struggling with it for the last 15 years bro, and every day since then was hell on earth. thank you for making the point brothers.
Thinking like this drives me up a wall. This thinking is common in the Caribbean as well. The Simone situation she isn't a quitter but she isn't necessarily a hero. She is honourable, humble and has a sense of accountability. Black people, Caribbean people and everyone with this kind of thinking. If you cannot help yourself, you cannot help others. You can ruin the lives of others around if you don't get yourself in check. I am not saying be selfish but tap out when needed.
@@Oll_704 m8 when ask if knew anyone out there that was capable of beating her dhe said "I don't know if I can be beaten". Y'all some hypocrites, if this was a male athlete y'all would be clowning on them. If an NBA player went around acting as boastful and arrogant as she has then pulled out of the playoffs cause it was "to much pressure for their mental state" y'all would roast that fool.
Yep. Agree. We have a guy at my unit with ptsd which I would consider to be severe. Like he’s not all the way there and I wouldn’t trust him to watch my back but they’re still keeping him. It’s sad
Im glad I came across this video. I was going to sign up for the navy, then was diagnosed with CPTSD and was on antipsychotic meds. The navy kept trying to get me to sign up before I graduated, even came to my work looking for me, until I told them my medical history when they asked. I use to get mad that they wouldn't take me after that but now I'm thankful they didn't because even now, almost 6yrs later, im not suitable for that type of work. This man needs to be preached to. So much love to everyone here❤.
A Special Forces veteran I follow on Instagram retired due to PTSD among other things. He said it compromised his ability to perform his job and the last thing he was gonna be was a liability to his teammates. He’s doing much better now. What people fail to understand is how even in the civilian world you are easily replaceable
a soldier being compared to a bratty gymnast who skipped events then participated in the one she knew she had a chance at is nowhere in the same realm of a soldier and what you guys are subjected to. Shes doing flips not dodging IED's so to even compare the two things is obtuse. This broad knew the sjw would defend her. Someone else who was dedicated and wanted to represent their country should have been there- not her. The fact that she came back in after skipping on her team is a disgrace
@@jennylee5003 are you saying that she didn't have a mental health issue, or are you saying that she should've ignored her mental issues? Also, are you implying that mental health issues should be taken seriously in a life-or-death situation?
@@jennylee5003 damn bro, where are your 4 gold medals? to call someone undedicated when you have the context of knowing she has won 4 gold medals before seems a bit dishonest don't you think?
@@jennylee5003 You seem to know a lot about someone you've never met and maybe she skipped because as she said she was having a hard time focusing? A flip is nowhere near an IED but what are you gonna say if she broke her neck because she misjudged her landing or couldn't focus in MID-AIR? Easy to make assumptions from your couch huh?
@@jennylee5003 look at this fack who has never done anything productive in their entire life wanna talk smack about an athlete who has 19medals....ohh ma God your mother was wrong for given birth to you.
I love you guys. Y'all really put people back in place. "Focus on what is said." People love to reach for something else to confuse the conversation. Y'all are amazing, love the work.
As a veteran myself, I’ve realized mental health is real. Before the military I thought people had to stop being mentally weak when that’s not the case. Trauma and constant exposure to a dangerous/toxic environment will fuck your mental state.
