Smash Ultimate Roster: Who's Actually Smashed? Tier List 

Yes this is a dumb video. Don't forget to Subscribe lol Update 1: Ken from Street Fighter is apparently married and has a kid now. I haven't played a Street Fighter since Street Fighter 2 Turbo World Championship Edition, where he was still a Chad. I've been getting mixed reports on Joker and what's implied to happen in certain scenes in Persona 5, but he is a high school student, so I'm still going to err on the side of virgo Update 2: February 17th, 2021 Pyra & Mythra: Y'all already know I've played Xenoblade 2 lol. Despite their designs that...leave very little to the imagination, they're both 500 year old beings, but they've only been awake for 2 of those years. Addam does not bone Mythra in the Prequel DLC, and there's no way Rex of all people boned either of them during the main game. So I'm going to go with "Probably Virgins" Tier, and given that Pyra & Mythra are technically artificial lifeforms, you could even make the argument that they're go with ROB and Megaman into the "Is a Robot" Tier. Update 3: June 2021 Kazuya Mishima: I don't think he ever officially got married, but he is the father of Jin Kazama, another Tekken protagonist starting with Tekken 3, so he goes into the "Has Kids" Tier Update 4: October 2021 Sora Kingdom Hearts: Is a child.

Sex doesn’t exist in the Mario universe. Babies canonically come from the Stork.

Link is not a virgin. There's a botw speedrun category called Get Laid%.

Bayonetta f*cked the entire competitive scene of Smash at one point. She really is a CHAD.

Wario actually chose money over getting married to a princess in one of his games XD

"Ink. isn't. cum. Except that time it was" That was so silly I love it

While Ken is indeed a CHAD, he also has a wife and a kid so he should go into the "married" tier

Pyra and Mithra New category: is a sword

"This tier list is based on in-game canon" "Wii Fit is a Chad" The game is literally just you exercising

Pit: *SIMP* dark pit: *dark SIMP*

Chrom and lucina are direct descendants of Marth so there is 0 speculation that Marth isn’t a virgin

I mean, Robin is such a Harem master that he controls the love life of his friends to ensure that their kids have the best growths

Hearing “Isabelle. She’s way too cute. Virgin” in a deep, raspy voice made my day.

Someone forgot the fact that Ken has a wife

As far as Joker is concerned, assuming you date only one of the girls, there's a part on Valentine's Day that heavily implies they go up to his room and "reveal their true forms". I think CHAD works better.

Terry actually actively tries not to date anyone. He’s one of those guys where everyone he tries to date dies for whatever reason (mostly because Geese kills them). He and Blue Mary just talk.

i like how his voice progressively gets lower.

*Fox* : Wild animal Seems right. *Falco* : Virgin Incomprehensible, have a bad night

“I’m going to put all of you in the CHAD tier” We’re gamers... you’re giving us too much credit

"Isabelle way to cute. Virgin." Twitter fanart: LIAR

I'm sorry but Luigi gets pegged by Daisy on the daily, Kirby is also a child

The tier list nobody openly wanted, but everyone has pondered.

I don't think Ike's ending with Ranulf is ever implied romantic. But his ending with Soren definitely is. Ike is the most underrated dragon-f*cker in the franchise.

Update: Xenoblade 3 confirms that Rex had kids with Pyra, Mythra, AND Nia; the main protagonist is one of those kids. As for its DLC, it gave us one of its protagonists as another of Rex's kids and insinuates that Shulk had a kid with Fiora. This means that Pyra, Mythra, and Shulk are certifiably Not Virgins.

Ike literally rejects multiple women in his 2 games

Peach has a small mushroom shaped man living under her dress at all times. I'm not going to say she's in Chad tier but it wouldn't surprise me if someone was tending to that garden.

K rool is actually married. Sort of. In DKC3 he makes a comment about his wife, but I’m not sure if it’s canonical or not.

Dixie is canonically Diddy's girlfriend, so I bet neither would be kids.

me 🤝 Luigi Big ol simp for Daisy

I’m just gonna throw out there Joker is definitely not a virgin

Paleutena is based on Athena who is also known as "the virgin goddess". The reason why she banished medusa in greek mythology in the first place was because she was once one of her followers, but then lost her virginity; she was r@ped by Poseidon.

Joker is a chad if you choose Takemi. She takes you upstairs for a “thorough examination.” ;)

Little Mac is a short king and I'm tired of pretending he isn't.

When he puts Roy in married and has kids but he’s only 15

Miis can actually have babies in Tomodachi Life for the 3DS, so from a canonical standpoint, they are indeed chads.

Joker is definitely chad depending on who you go with. One of the girls you have a choice to date is a doctor named Takemi. It’s implied during a one of their cutscenes (Christmas Date), and basically confirmed in the Valentines animation that they did the deed.

We all know Piranha Plant’s in S-tier, people love receiving flowers on Valentine’s Day and even without lipstick their face is still absolutely beautiful. And that pipe do be packin’ doe

"jade is the correct answer" listen jade is basically hero's older sister and erik is RIGHT THERE

Wario and Waluigi, unlike their red and green counterparts, are supposedly not related. Make of that what you will.

Putting Shulk in the "dumb" category is pretty ironic, considering he's probably the most intelligent character in _Smash..._

Honestly I didn't expect that many virgins to be in Smash.

Young Link is actually a chad as the hero of twilight is a direct descendent from him (the hero of time). Unless we aren’t talking about the Young Link from the Child timeline, in which case we don’t know if he eventually smashed or not. Somehow even in a video not about it the Zelda timeline is making things confusing

Shulk is definitely a CHAD. He and Fiora 100% get it on

Joker literally bangs everytime he reaches confidant 10 whit any female he knows, i would say thats chad

Ken has a child and is married. Ryu is virgin man

I mean joker can be a virgin but he does do it with teachers, nurses, models, someone who is the literal head of a fucking company, etc if you do actually max out their confidants

There’s no way Joker is a virgin with how Kawakami and Takemi are

Isabelle is to cute to not be a virgin The internet: we already took care of that

Dark Pit is an anti-simp, but ironically still a virgin because he's such an anti-simp he pushes everyone away. :( Edit: Oh yeah and SUBBED!

I don't think you've seen the Get Laid% speedrun of BoTW

“They’d be more deliberate with Ike being gay if he was made today” boy, if you’re a gay guy you only get like 3 options in three houses

Xenoblade Chronicles Definitive Edition: HEAVILY Implies that Shulk and Fiora got together, and im 100% certain that she'd be itching to test out some of her more... "fleshy".... functions now that she isn't a goddamn robot. Also, Future's Connected Shulk just RADIATES the "I got laid but now my girlfriend is getting on my nerves" vibe.

In Three Houses you’re only 2-3 years older than some students and younger than a few and then everyone grows up to actual full adults by the end too

It's actually implied that you boned every one of your dates in P5 including adults and loli- Wait what the fu

"I'm gonna put you on chad" Me who's under 18: *sicko mode starts playing*

Steve: "Hello young lady."

This is art. I don't know what else to say

Regarding Heroes: Eleven: as you said you can get married at the end of the game (Jade is always the right choice). Besides, his game chronologically is the first and he's probably Erdrick's predecessor. Erdrick (Arusu): has no partner during the game, but is the ancestor of the protagonists of Dragon quest 1 and 2, so he is not a virgin (it is hard to believe that the protagonists of Dragon quest are virgins considering how much they like puff puff). Hero from Dragon quest 4: He has no partner during the story, but it is implied that he is the ancestor of Madason and his sons (the hero of dragon quest V). In addition, the male protagonist has too close a relationship with Eliza (the elf friend of his childhood. This is seen in Dragon quest 6). Eight (hero from Dragon quest 8): He's married at the end of the game (Jessica is the right choice and you all know it!!!!). So he's not a virgin and he's well served.

the hardest ive laughed all week also, i like the extra effort put in here, your facecam doesnt cut at all yet somehow matches your cut audio track. slick

Mario: Sad virgin Sonic: virgin who doesn’t give a fuck about Girls New catagorey: proud virgins

I'm all the way down at Z tier.

Ken has a wife and a child, and I think its implied that Ryu gets with his student at the end of third strike?

Shulk: defeated god by himself This guy: special virgin dumb XD

there probably should have been a “depends on the players actions category” for people like byleth and robin

Joker is definitely not a virgin, he’s a chad second only to the true chad of Persona being Yu Narukami

“Steve and Alex, I have no fucking idea so I’m assuming no” Me: *good, you dodged a big ass bullet right there*

Shulk smashed Fiora after he fell to the beach with her.

13:43 I find funny how he didn't even think about it too hard. He just went "Yeah, they bone. Next character!" It's like a universal thing at this point, either you are against of the idea, and see them just as friends or you are totally chill with the idea that they're into each other. And honestly? I ship them too, so hell yeah!

THE GOAT OF CONTENT

I deadass couldnt stop laughing for the entirety of this video LMFAO

Palutena is based on Athena (often called Pallas Athena), one of the 3 greek goddesses who specificaly had made a vow of being eternal virgins together with hestia and artemis, so its safe to assume palu actually doesn't go to pound town

10:32 Sooooo......... about that....... my man Shulk has a kid now.

RelaxAlax found that King K. Rool has a wife. He exclaims so in one of this fight lines.

I don't know why but 5:07 got me

Link literally has a mission where it is implied he slept with the shy girl.

I saw this in my recommended and... and I couldn’t skip it

I rather have Fox X Wolf just to delete Krystal off series

I might start something with this, but I think little Mac is canonically 17.

8:55 SWEEEEET HOME AAAAAALABAMA

"Wait what the fu-" is my favorite quote

me: *sees the miis in the CHAD tier* Also me: Hey mom, I'm in CHAD tier. Mom: WHAT?

Pauline *does* remember Mario. She’s just too busy dealing with the Mecha-Wiggler problem

“Short men are not kings” SHUT

9:56 heavily disagree with Palutena's placement on the list. I mean, I get the reasoning but seeing as she is based on Athena specifically, makes me believe she should have been lower on the list. But if she was based on Aphrodite, it would be a completely different story.

It's about time we get an important tier list

I like how Dedede has such Big Alpha energy that he goes in the Chad category despite being an animal.

"You can make a videogame, and not put that in!" That's the case for a lot of games

Not what I was expecting to see today, but still pretty good

I love how ganon is just the only guy of an all girl tribe so he Is MEGA C H A D

Dark Samus is a Metroid, and thus a member of a species that has a hive-queen relationship similar to bees. It's highly unlikely that the metroid that mutated into Dark Samus was a queen, because otherwise she would have stayed with the other metroids on Tallon IV; However, it's hard to know because Metroids are incapable of going through their healthy life cycles when not in the proper environment; so, considering Dark Samus was a test tube baby who was likely made through cloning, i think it's fair to call her, like... an actual incel. Like, not even in the "eughhhh i cant get girls because i want them to treat me like kings and constantly obsess over me" kind of incel, as in she's literally incapable of having sexual desire...

7:34 most Sonic fanfiction also does all of that despite him being canonically 15 years old *FBI OPEN UP-*

I think Toon Link would be "married and has kids" because at the end of Phantom Hourglass Link and Tetra find a new continent and call it New Hyrule and in Spirit Tracks Zelda tells Link that she's Tetra's descendant, and I doubt she would've done it with any of her crew.

Square Enix actually confirmed that Cloud x Tifa did happen before the final battle lmao.

After xenoblade 3 we know both pyra and mythra have canonically fucked

dude, amazing. :_D

Great video

I swear half way through he started talking like he's narrating a fan fiction

thank u so much king , really needed this 😩 😩 😩

Young Link does EVENTUALLY raise a family after the events of OOT & MM. This is confirmed because Twilight Princess Link is a descendant of Young Link.

5:45 😂 they should hire this man to announce characters