STABBITY STAB STAB | Chivalry 2 

I'M SPONSORED!! IT'S A GLORIOUS DAY!! Use my Creator Code MARKIPLIER on the Epic Games Store for Chivalry 2 -- store.epicgames.com/markiplier/chivalry-2

The tutorial voice sounded like a dude who has trained so many new recruits and watched them all go off to die that he's decided to just write everything down and read it back to each new guy so he doesn't have to put in any effort. It's fantastic

“I’m going to play against real people and I am going to suck and then I’m gonna go back to playing with the robot so I feel better about myself” Online gaming in a nutshell

With his constant war on brands that refuse to sponsor him (for whatever misguided reason), Mark has managed to turn sponsorships, and therefore ads, into content, which both ensures that the viewers will watch it and won't get bored doing so.

“Thanks for nothing Jeffrey!” - Peasant Sean.

Mark: Is almost dead His instinct: Tis but a scratch

How to tell if Mark is playing a sponsored game: He actually plays through the whole tutorial.

"Go blue team!" *shoots teammate in the face with an arrow*

“Guys, oh my god, I think I’m playing with Markiplier!” Markiplier: “RRTRWR”

"I soiled meself and nobody cares!" Thats a quality quote right there, up there with "Dodge this you bastard!"

I'd love to see bob mark and wade play this together.

Mark: "I will hold this gate and none shall pass." Also Mark: backs up to let them through

Nobody: Mark every 5 seconds: im throwing it!

Did you know that Jacksepticeye was casted to do voices in this game, thats why "Thanks for nothing, Jeffrey" sounds like him, because its him. At 23:10

Mark: literally has a hole in his chest. Puts a bandaid on it: GOOD AS NEW

This game actually looks really fun. Would get it if my computer wasn't a potato

The voice acting is just gold, and the general vibe is hilarious in this game

You could’ve used the only weapon that actually works in this game: the chicken

Image playing an online game and thinking "who's this idiot who keeps getting themselves killed" then find out it's none other than Markiplier 🤣

“This like a delivery?” It’s UPS vs FedX

Mark: "Finally, I have a sponsor" AFK Arena: "Am I joke to you?"

imagine - you and your buddies in bloody conquest on the battlefield. a man runs by you wearing default armor, swinging every which way with his default weapon and screaming his lungs out. he somehow manages to slaughter five of your closest friends. when the dust settles, your remaining friend asks, turning to you, “was that fucking markiplier?”

Congratulations Mark for finally getting a sponsor, Epic Game.

"Finally sponsored" he says while ignoring that Alienware has already sponsored him before.

Markiplier: "I finally have a sponsor." Me: *remembers that Marvel Strike Force sponsored him before*

*Hits teammate* “I’M SORRY!” *Proceeds to launch axe into the same teammates back* “I’m sorry... again!”

Markiplier about to be sponsored by everyone

"Thanks for nothing, Jeffrey" Me: Jack?

Ah, yes the battlecries: "Boinkus! Yoinkus! Ahhhhh, Doinkus!!"

That “thanks for nothing Jeffrey” sounded a lot like Sean. *reads comments* It WAS Sean!

Markiplier running towards his own team members: I'M ATTACKING

23:10 “Thanks for nothin’, Jeffrey!” My middle name is insulted, Seán!

Truly disgusting, that “Takis” would do this horrible thing.

That "thanks for nothing Jeffrey" sounded like Sean ha

Soldier: "I SOILED MESELF AND NOBODY CARES!!" Me: "Well that is authentic medieval!"

It would be funny if they added in a feature later down the line where you can record some personalized, short voice clips for your own taunts and war cries for your character. Imagine playing this and suddenly you hear Mark yelling as he charges at you down a hill XD That feature would probably make the battle field 10x more chaotic, but it would be a sight to behold.

Hearing Jack's voice at 23:10 reminds me that his last video was three weeks ago and I miss him. Hope he's doing well on his break.

Lixian just absolutely nailed it with his animated persona. That lil guy is perfect and I honestly look forward to, and wait for, the moment that he enters the video. That lil backstabber is somehow just the most endearing lil fella I've ever come across.

"Thanks for nothing, JEFFERY!" *proceeds to get punched in the face*

Markiplier: I wish I had a weapon Also markiplier: I’m throwing it!

19:32 “Who healed me? Is there medics in this game?” Meanwhile, on screen: Healed by gamerxlon126

Mark: spells out his name in the intro. My brain: “Ah! It’s demons! RUN JIM! RUN! RUUUUNNN!

22:02 killed me, especially when he started typing. His real-life gibberish talk made it into chat. 😂🤣

*The title says it all, Mark stabs people in this video.*

"Because you pay me mahney". I'm ambivalent about Markiplier. But god damn if this wasn't the most honest sponsored video I've ever seen.

"I'm talking now!" I was literally crying laughing

Epic: sponsors Mark everyone: you weren't supposed to do that...

23:10 Seán: "Thanks for nothing, Jeffery" Jeffery: so you have chosen... *death*

Mark gets a sponser: “Epic games I love you “ 2 weeks later Mark: epic games is dead to me

That opening cinematic was epic with the lion and the guy's head. The hype was real with that moment

"Listen, you're throwing a lot of stuff at me assuming that I'm actually going to be good at this which I don't think I will be but I will try my best" - Every student in existence ever

"Thanks for nothing, Jeffrey!" *SMACK* **DIES**

"I don't have any medicals but I can scream" kind of sums up the American health system

"I'M THROWING IT!!" *hits teammate or misses the enemy*

My friend when charging in to battle: "I'm attacking!" Me when charging into battle: "I soiled myself and nobody cares!"

“Thanks for nothing, Jefferey” I can’t unhear Sean

Markiplier is the best on RU-vid no cap

Markiplier: Epic games is my only sponsor Alien Ware: m’kay

"I have no sponsors." *Has literally been sponsored by Alienware on more than one occasion*

"i soiled me self and nobody cares" - Markiplier 2021

"Spoils of War usually come after the battle though" > "Unlike your mother" I almost spit out my water

epic games: sponsored Markiplier me: perhaps I treated you too harshly

Mark: *Plays tutorial* Mark when he starts the game: *Forgets parts of the tutorial*

I like how mark didn't notice that the "Thanks For Nothing, Jeffrey" was actually Jacksepticeye.

This is the perfect game for Mark to satisfy his masochistic urges.

Lol Mark saying “Yee/You would never” just goes along with the gameplay

*I LOVE LIXAINS LITTLE CHARTER THING IT LOOKS SO CUTE LMAOOO*

“OI SOILED MESELF AND NOBODY CARES!” That made me laugh so hard

"Hey I'm not a bottom!" -Markiplier 2021

The battle cries of all the voices and characters are literally one of the best things in the game

Chivalry 1: I'm pretty fun but my combat is wonky UwU Mordau: Hold my beer peasant. HAVE AT THEM, BOYS Chivalry 2: Hmm I just. Might. Do that.

"This is My First Day!!!" "I soiled Me Self And Nobody Cares!!!" "Get them Before they Kill me!!!" "Go Blue team!!!"

nobody: jack voicing for this game: "thanks for nothing, jeffrey!"

“I’m going to play with real people and do terrible and then I’m going to go right back to the bots to make myself feel better” As an ex-Mordhau player that was me a lot of the time

the screaming in the game is legit the most hilarious thing

I swear you're the only RU-vidr that has successfully made me laugh at 4 AM without stopping! xDDDD

"Not sure if I'm allowed to say that." I don't see why not. After all, being sponsored directly translates to "they pay you mah-knee"

Mark: "I don't like this game, I mean I like this game..." gonna lose that sponsorship fast

9:03 THE HOLY HAND GRENADE

18:18 13th century fedex was something else

Don’t worry guys. Markiplier just wants his new sponsor to give him MO-NEË.

“Because they pay me,, M o han nee” -Markiplier

Mark is literally the Kenny of video games sometimes. Especially in this game.

Legends say the Giggling Fairyman killed thousands in the great war. Many heard his cries, nobody cared but he made them care, for his axe was bloody and his pants soiled.

“RRTWR” really got me for some reason 😭

"Ammo's all gone!" *holds arrow in hand but refuses to freaking fire it

How many times you wanna mention that you're sponsored? Markiplier: Yes

All i can hear for the last 10 minutes is Sean yelling random stuff in the background😂😂😂

"That's a lot of emotes slots." MapleStory: "Psht. Amateurs."

Mark masters the tutorial Immediately forgets everything and flails around hitting stuff

Mark: Whyn'tcha come through the gate? *gets head lopped off*

27:09 Mark: I'm devasting you That guy: *gets devastated by his own teammate for no reason*

"Why don't you come through the gate?" Lopez: Okay

I did this in real life and the day care owner got really mad 😓

"thanks for nothin', Jeffrey" sounds exactly like Sean an no one can tell me otherwise

intro: Makriplier rambling about a sponsored my brain: "I'm Commander Shepard and this is my favorite store on the Citadel"

Food Companies are just scared on giving him Sponsors this time around

17:09 I love the chemistry with Lix and Mark he set that joke up for him so well cause he new he would finish it like team work

"Heeyaw, Huuyah!" *swings weapon* *message appears on screen* "Healed by YEEEHAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW"

Markiplier: **Charges in** Sabaton: *THEN THE WINGED HUSSARS ARRIVED!!*