Stephen Colbert's Return To New Zealand: A Magical Land Where Hugs Still Happen 

Right back at'cha Aussie. Bugger about the Bledisloe but I guess we have to let you have it every now and then... :-)

#UnderarmBowlingIncident

Love you too Aussie.

Right back at cha Aus.

Er, speaking as a Brit (residing in France) I am shocked and dismayed at your underhand tactics of reducing the England Cricket team to "less than arch enemy" status. Typical Aussies!

Exactly the same here in Tasmania. While Melbourne was in a second lock down we were off on a road trip!

@@lindacollings8554 Yet another isolated Island.

@@mitchyoung8791 isolated? hmm only an hour's flight from Melbourne and 2 from Sydney, I wouldn't call that isolated. If that's what you call isolated, then Tasmania is as isolated to Australia as Britain is to France

You have no idea how many of us wants to enjoy those things you just mentioned, things we'd call "normal" less than a year ago Sincerely, the rest of the world. Kia ora.

@@mitchyoung8791 So is the UK, and a fat lot of good that did.

Perfect for when someone asks me how mine sits.

right 😂😂😂

Isn't it to the left? Unless coming from Antartica

@@DrJohnnyJ actually, no. So, just to clarify for you, “down under,” apparently, has been used to refer to one country - and one country only, Australia. New Zealand is to the ‘right’ (that is, east) of ‘down under.’ Antarctica is probably something like “deep down under” but I believe most people just call it “the south pole” (or Santa’s home?). / [Addendum: This is my personal opinion to this joke. I am not a professional at idioms, colloquialism, and the like.]

I come from a land down under *a bit to the right* Where beer does flow and men chunder Can't you hear, can't you hear the thunder?

Lol

@Tyson Buck if you regard having MONEY as being rich then I guess we are a poor nation.

Ah, chur bro x xxxx x

I mean, at least both countries ain’t holding mummies hand no more *cough cough* Uk *cough*

As a Canadian I fully understand you being the New Zealand equivalent in North America. Never really thought of it but so many similarities, even population ratio is similar.

We still do travel a lot, it’s considered a right of passage. Today we just had the first country confirmed that we can travel to and from with no quarantine at either end. It may just be the Cook Islands, but I see a tourism boom coming their way 😀. It may be small but it’s a start.

@Jean Murray Well, international tourism before the lockdown was nearing maximum capacity, and many were getting fed up with it, including me. It's too cheap and not giving too much high quality to New Zealand in return.

@Jean Murray By that I mean low value.

Yes and no. I think that the reason that the NZ did so well might be that the Kiwis did _not_ view that as "oh no, we are giving something up" but as "we are postponing travels so we _can_ safely do it in the future". They managed for the overwhelming part to stay healthy and alive so they can travel again, and they are probably the least likely to have to quarantaine upon entering another country.

Along with Aussies

Jacinda is a beautiful soul!

As another Kiwi. Totally agree!!

You guys should be proud, your country is just incredible.

Adopt me! Please! I can cook and everything!

Agreed, but I'm pretty sure you didn't invent bungee jumping. Wasn't that one of the other Pacific islands?

Bet you live in mangere

@@TK-bj9ct lol don't be mean. Mangere Bridge is lovely anyway.

Thank you so much for showing the rest of the world how to be a successful nation!

Please please pretty please let me live with you

@@TK-bj9ct i live in mangere bridge

Surely a little bit to the left?

Or as we say in Australia directly across the Tasman Sea aka 3 hours & 11 minutes as the QANTAS Flying Rat goes. ✈🦘

Actually speaking as an Australian it's just a bit to the left. But then we know which was is up, up here. And no community transmission here either for the last few weeks.

Here in NZ we mostly refer to it as "holy shit, that map remembered to put us on!"

Steven*

Unenlightened Americans: "But, but, muh free-dumb!!"

Guns are not freedom

@@stevec6427 🤣🤣🤣🤣 don't let a Trump supporter see this. They will go nuts on you.

Bullying is not strength.

well said.

🇨🇦😀🖖🇺🇸🌍🤣❤🙏🖖👍

New Zealand is nothing like Australia.

@@jannythomas3104 NZ and Australia are more similar to each other than any other two countries.

As an Aussie, we pretty much see NZ as our younger brother we compete with to be best in sports. But still proud and love that they overachieve at things while at the same time has a bit of jealousy of the fact. Love my Kiwi brothers ans sisters 🤙🇦🇺🇳🇿

I would rather go back to New Zealand

We in US are so envious

ADOPT ME

Happy to be a Taswegian too. 😂

Me too!

You really don’t have to rub it in, mate 😢

Umm, when was that?

@@Agnemons I'll tell you when trump publishes his tax returns

Thanks Rain Man. I think your new president should be able to get it under control.

@@Agnemons yeah, must be before my lifetime, I'm only 47, after all

Best leader ever. Australia's done well fighting Covid too, but it was because of our state leaders, not Scomo our PM.

Wow you guys are so lucky man! Asked us!

The love you withold is the pain that you carry.

Americans seem to mistake carelessness for courage.

@@mrnonsense1031 The 38% think that petulantly acting on their impulses and violently threatening them for an inconvenience is somehow courageous when they dominate the police force in most places.

And sometimes it is knowing when it's okay to just be a bit of a coward...and not jump off a f***ing bridge.

You learned something from "Green Lantern", then. See Ryan, it wasn't a waste! ;-)

How wonderful to be able to say such .. !!

I love my country Australia and I wanna kidnap your Prime Minister lol, but we are out the other side now and looking forward to visiting NZ soon

Me too! Kia ora

wish we could say that lmfao

She is some woman. I love the UK but I’d love to have your PM.

@Danny Trump Thats why we watch Aljazeera and BBC !!

@Danny Trump is that why so many dead??in America that's massively sad wish it was fake 🥀

@Danny Trump - BBC isn't government-funded, but is a public-service broadcaster predominantly funded by licence-paying public, advertizing revenue from commercial radio stations and selling / licencing programs to other countries. The British Parliament sets the licence fee and even though it's a state-owner enterprise, it has complete editorial freedom and independence. Al-Jazeera on the other hand is state-funded by Qatar, not Iran - naturally, it is Arab-centric, and as such, has had it's share of controversies.

@@richardbaron7106 but you get to see both sides of the coin whe nyou watch those 2 stations i usually watch those then the french and Australian news

@Danny Trump you know the saying you can lead a horse to water but no guarantee it will drink same with brains if you Dont have them there is no meds to fix that😆good luck though glad I'm not American lol 😇😇😇😇

Well "inventing" the jetboat isn't particularly impressive when you consider you didn't invent the jet engine (thanks Nazi Germany!) NOR the boat (ancient world technology).

@@hubertcumberdale2651 What a strange thing to comment given what you said is completely unrelated. I see you enjoy trivializing others achievements to make yourself sound smart.

It's true, we're generally too insignificant and small to be acknowledged by the rest of the world. So when a celebrity or organisation mentions us (especially in good light), we get all excited because it's rare

You are acknowledged. Sir Peter Jackson if my favorite writer-producer-director. Sam Neil and this vineyards in Central Otago. Taika Waititi, Temuera Morrison, Manu Bennett. The list goes on and on. Kia Ora.

I love when we get acknowledged

Lol, you act like shutting down Auckland, Wellington, and Christchurch airports (which halts essentially 99% of all the incoming and outbound movement of human beings to NZ) is such an amazing accomplishment compared to stopping Covid in the world's 3rd largest and 3rd most populous nation which is the epicenter of global logistics, commerce, conventions, cruise liners, etc.

My thoughts exactly. Whilst I appreciate the praise given to NZ, we don't want to draw attention to ourselves.

@@melw5390 just tell them NZ is located in the middle of Australia and we'll be alright

It's OK, we're not even on many world maps :) They won't find us.

@@melw5390 you just know there was at least 1000 people who looked up flights to nz after watching this lol

It's algud. NZ is like the clitorus of Papatuanuku (mother earth). Half the population can't find it, and most of them don't believe it exists. NZ is down under and a little to the left... Hahahaha

Kia Ora 💖

Aroha atu aroha mai

Hopefully u can come back. 🙏

Don't worry - I'm American - you're not alone. 😩🥰

Sorry m8

I always think I'd like to try it, but i can't even make myself jump off the diving board!

Me neither. I was watching him standing on the edge and l wanted to lie down on my floor here! No way could l have done that!

"An American who" darling. Kia kaha sis.

Stay there.

@@tuckerbugeater I plan to

Idk why but that hashtag is making me mad.. like your either Kiwi or another country lmao not both combined

@@tuckerbugeater we're all globalists down here coming to take your guns and force vaccines on you that calcify your pineal gland....🤭😂😂😂

Keep your dignity please.

Delicious hand pies as well - Copenhagen bakery in Christchurch, and Fairlie Bakehouse in Fairlie. We don't understand why savory pies aren't more popular in the US...

Thanks crystlangel we think we are the best island, but ssshhh don't tell everyone :)

Aww. Thanks crystlangel! Fairlie pies are amazing. Did a 3 day loop from Christchurch with the excuse of eating some just last month.

@@crystlangel and ​ @Niki P check out Sheffield Pies next time you make it to the South Island (there must be a next time sometime, surely?), like L&P they are world-famous in New Zealand.

Oh shut up new Zealand Just shut up with your good leadership low corona virus count & good gun laws just shut the he'll up ... Pssst can I get a visa

So just to be clear, is NZ still like a normal country? Like can you go to cafes, festivals with friends, go to movies,restaurants etc? If so, i wanna move there lol

@@tamamalosi Take me with you!!! Awesome btw!

@@tamamalosi I hope so, i miss the good old normal stuff like eating out or going out with family and friends!

Kiora! I have been to your beautiful country and it changed my life. I went bungee jumping and it was the greatest feeling in the world!

Coughs and prayers

@@vegetariansuniteworldwide8091 Proud to be a Kiwi. Beautiful country..

Another Kiwi here. We would forget all about covid if it wasnt for internet lol

@@vegetariansuniteworldwide8091 kia ora*

Yeah it means not needing to do it :D

NZ freedom: Country first. USA freedom: *ME* first.

add on this part Owners . .... "if it affects OTHERS", right? .......... in other words, my freedom stops where your freedom starts .. the Golden Rule.

Nor is freedom backed by a gun

@@andrefasset3266 Hear, hear André!! Well said!! :-)

You know, we had this guys back in 1776 that had a similar idea. I wonder why their ideas got ignored.

Because we are run by godless secular Socialist liberals, that’s why! Our Prime Minister is living out of wedlock with the father of her child. I doubt she goes to church -- nobody has asked that I know of, and nobody cares. The Government respects the people, the people respect the Government, and both of them respect science. That can be painful sometimes, but we suffered through it.

instead of corporations? wtf a concept lol

@barb rarick I think that was sarcasm from Lawrence....

@barb rarick that man/woman lawrence prolly a russian bot lol

I visited south island in 2019 - epic adventure driving by myself. Great vistas all around.

@@rajendrarusmana8792 We're the prettiest island AKA "The Mainland". 😄

I lived in dunedin for a year very nice people but dont go drinking with them

@@geoffpriestley7001 lol! Were you with the uni students?

@@rajendrarusmana8792 indeed! I remember Christchurch and Dunedin...

That killed me 😂

Yup lol but definitely could’ve been worse I reckon 😂

It was cute lol

It was pretty good for a first timer .

It makes me appreciate my Māori culture even more when our religion is spread around the world. I think it's a beautiful thing when people whom are not of New Zealand decent speak our native tongue. Tino ataahua korero 🙏🏾❤🙏🏾

Agreed. Middle Earth never felt so comfortable.

We in the southern hemisfear next to australia our neighbors

@@robertalexander5345 no. Theres nothing there but covid.

U don't look hard never herd of Aotearoa bro we a head of time uz behind we are not on lockdown uzwe know cuzie

LOL! Isn't that guy from the Amazing Race from New Zealand??? Same with Xena??

Oh shut up new Zealand Just shut up with your good leadership low corona virus count & good gun laws just shut the he'll up ... Pssst can I get a visa

Yeah but they won't

Don't worry though, we've still got our fair share of covid-deniers and people bitching and whining about "that commie lesbian dictator in charge of the country" who thinks climate change is real. They just don't control national policy decisions.

Too bad its a distant past dream and not a record to cherish as New Zealand. R I P

The US is too big with too many people with too many varying levels of indifference. It simply could never have happened, but I'm not an expert. All I know is what I see at the grocery market.

@@EmpyreanLightASMR it 100% couldve happened. Laws are laws. Do a hard lockdown. Pay everyone their wages. Done. The only politicians who don’t want to do it are corrupt and are working for corporations. No profits when people stay at home!

I'm sitting here trying to come up with some kind of incentive that would make me bungee jump, or anything like that...I got nothing.

Got the same feeling here in Taiwan. I was talking to friends in the States about reusable shopping bags, and they said, "Oh yeah, we'll be allowed to use those again in January or February maybe." smh

I boy, I am so, so envious. I'm lucky to live in a European country that more or less got a grip on it, but we have our share of "it's not a real pandemic without dead bodies piling up on the streets, masks cut off your oxygen supply, ..." idiots and it's driving me bloody nuts. NZ can really be proud, not just on having a competent, conscientious Prime Minister but also on being smart enough to work _with_ her, not expect the government to solve a problem on their own while the population leans back and complains.

@@Julia-lk8jn I remember at the start of the pandemic, the opposition parties stood by the Prime Minister. In hindsight, it helped a lot on communicating the importance of the steps we were about to take. I reckon other countries can take a page out of this as well. Anyhow, there’s light at the end of the tunnel. Here’s hoping 2021 will be much kinder to everyone. Sending💕 to everyone.

Just need a meat pie emoji to complete the set

@Wild Bill just the way we want it 👍

Fellow Kiwi here. I am pleased that Labour got in again, now I really, really hope that Jacinda and her government pull out all the stops to address NZ's big, big problems: housing (that's a big one); child poverty; improving the healthcare system, esspecially mental health; child poverty; child protection; justice/prison reform. Aotearoa has a lot going for it and I'm glad to be here, but there is much work to do.

@@LeeBee-hs6mj absolutely! Would love to own a house before I’m 936 years old

Officially MMP was introduced in 1996. But I can understand your confusion. 1993 felt a lot like an MMP election. ;)

@@lawrencedoliveiro9104 I’m not confused. It was changed by referendum in 1993, as my comment says. But you’re right that the first election using it was 1996

It would be nice to vote for people who did a great job vs. against people who are not.

Yeah you know they say you can actually do the jump without the bungee even, but only once.

It's not the height or the drop that will kill you. It's the hard stop at the end.

I am an American and disgusted with my fellow Americans.

We have a saying down here, that "we're a team of 5 million "

True patriotism is staying home for the greater good. Not driving around with a gun and a flag complaining about your rights being taken away.

1940s thousands upon thousands of people sacrificing their lives in a world war to protect the freedoms of others. 2020: Can’t wear a mask to protect others because it’s too hard

and our administration

Not the only country to do well without the vaccine.

Not when Chris said that we can spread our legs

Nazi Germany did that once :)

Only two of those were kiwis by the way, the rest were Australian and American tourists. I had Facebook do a friend recommendation for one of the deceased on the anniversary... as one of my cousins in Oz was friends with her, and people were posting on her page for it (her mother also died with her).

you're doing well mate

@@jeremyelliot4831 I wish America was doing better

*0 cases. It's all in HQ quarantine now. We're on track to eliminating it by new years.

@@rkim2214 Summer is here. From the winterless north!

@@rkim2214 you should be down at the basin 🇳🇿

Politically, Biden is probably not too far off .. the NZ National Party, maybe? Their Democrats have “progressive” members (like Bernie Sanders, AOC etc) who are probably closer to our Labour Party, but it seems Biden is not giving them much voice.

Looking forward to your visit, work your way down the country, North Island then down to the South Island, plz don't forget the West Coast of the South Island.

@Minami Uchida I understand what you mean. In my country too the tourist hotspots are almost unrecognizable without the usual crowds. Unfortunately, given the restrictions we have, even the residents cannot really enjoy this nice change of pace. I'm glad that you guys at least have that silver lining.

@@commonsense6702 I think I need to do some research. Right now it is a bit too depressing, though. Because if I start planning I'll start also thinking how long it will take before I can actually go. Anyway, thanks for your welcome and kind suggestions. If I may, is it there any specific spot I should absolutely not miss, in your opinion?

Please go to Wellington they are very sad bc tourists tend to not go there 😢

@@hialmiky3295 I live in Welly, and obvs you've never been down on lambton Quay when there's a cruise ship in town. We're just fine without tourists thanks :)

😂💔😞

@Sassy Sarina **hug** 😛 All corona quarantine complaining aside, the warm hoodie out of the dryer is the highlight of doing the laundry. 😉

American Republican reads: "Socialism" or "Leftist Commie Liberal."

@@Longtack55 It would be good if socialism starts getting a new connotation, based on what truly prosperous countries are doing, and not based on the McCarthy era fear.

you can always pay someone

I never believe this, sorry for disturbing. I thought my husband loved me like he claimed since he lost he's job i have taken up the position of the bread winner providing for my family any possible way i can which got me very busy . Each time i got home tired after long day he would insist on sex but i refused and this has been going on for a while but he stopped i thought he understood until i started getting calls from my kids school that he doesn't show up on time to get the children from school , i got pissed and decided to secretly monitor his movements but it wasn't possible due to my crazy work schedule then i contacted a private investigator and a reliable hacker. He got me complete access to him through his phone without his knowledge . To my surpise , I saw his messages with his so - called mistress who he chooses over our kids and noticed the affair has been going on a while and under my nose i was heartbroken and disappointed . My story was long but i wanna appreciate Donald (feeddonald @ gmail.com) got it all sorted without stress by texting / whatsapp +14695632325...You can text him if you want to know your spouse activities on phone thanks👍..

I hope that you're in New Zealand only because you're better off there at the moment than you would be in the US.

@@itwasagoodideaatthetime7980 yep! I haven't spent a lot of time in the US, my dad was just an expat. But as a citizen I do try to keep engaged in whats going on there, I vote in the US elections and file my taxes. There are some things I like better about the US but overall NZ is the better place to live.

@@mcteethinator I'm curious what are those things you like better?

​@@desired117 Lots of reasons - long comment incoming. The US has a lower homelessness rate than NZ, lower house prices overall while NZ has Cali-tier house prices for worse houses (moldy/uninsulated/etc). Average house price in NZ is like 7x than of the US. I bring that up first cos I'm househunting. It's a big reason why 1 in 5 NZers were overseas before COVID. For a developed first world country we have very high incarceration rates (outside of the US), and the majority of those in prison are indigenous, which is not a great look. We like to ignore stuff like that to show a progressive image abroad. Our cost of living is quite high due to our geographic isolation from major trade routes. We have a lot of the same problems as Hawaii in that regard. After returning I was like "they charge how much for a zucchini???", etc. Even dairy is expensive here, and its one of our major industries. Even though I think the average NZer is more intelligent than the average American due to our education system, NZers tend to be very apathetic about our domestic problems cos "oh Australia / US / UK has x y z worse". I think the predominant NZ European culture (or "Pakeha" as we call ourselves) is a very passionless, conformist culture - in fact there was even a book written about this in the 1970s "The Passionless People". Also look up "tall-poppy syndrome". We're like if British cuisine were a person. I like how passionate Americans get, even when they're wrong - because a lot can get done when they're right. NZers have a ho-hum laidback "she'll be right mate" attitude. Which can be cool sometimes but I generally find it irritating. How small the country means our economy is not particularly diverse so if you don't wanna work in a super basic field like tourism, agriculture/farming, real estate, finance, accounting, etc you really need to go overseas, which not everyone is able to do. I ran into this problem myself and had to move to Australia, where I didn't have a social safety net (beyond good healthcare/education). This screwed me when COVID hit. In the US I really like how big it is so you have lots of career options - if a city isn't working out for you, you can go to hundreds of other cities/towns if you can afford it and not be quite as vulnerable as being an NZer in a foreign country. While in NZ, if you wanna stay in the country and want to be in a large 1mil+ pop city, Auckland's your only choice, and that city has a lot of issues re: urban planning, housing market, public transport, etc. It's like if LA was on a Seattle-style isthmus. Wellington and Christchurch are "cities" by NZ standards but not really by international standards, imo. I've always dreamed of using my citizenship to spend more time in the US, exploring the vast country/landscape/history. But right now in this global political climate, NZ is preferable - NZ has an EXTREMELY moderate, centrist, fact-based political culture (I'm more of a socialist/greenie type) and I can't really imagine it falling to fascism like I can see happening with a lot of other countries right now. And class divides aren't as strong here. If you wanna emigrate to NZ to escape all the hyper-partisan apocalyptic BS, I'd recommend it but it could get boring/frustrating how 24/7 100% chill it is, and like any country it has social problems. I have some frustrations with NZ compared to Australia - Australia has a way better public healthcare system, for example. But the US is far worse than NZ in regards to that. LMAO

jumping out a plane is a totally different experience than off a bridge. The grounds so far away (or should be lol) that its hard to process as falling. But when the ground is coming at you real fast its a totally different feel

My wife’s Bajan, she went to that game

Exactly!!!

@jimbo Truthson Tell that to Hawaii and Guam. US territories absolutely suffering from abysmal leadership.

I grew up 90 minutes away from where he jumped, though I never felt the need to jump off a perfectly good bridge. Well, not one that high at least. There are some nice swimming spots where it's like a 2 meter jump.

You cannot be an Australian !!

@@mikew506 look I'm not gonna say it to your face or anything...😂

lol thanks Ange! Loved it! Thank you for being the one Aussie on here who's had the courtesy/decency/respectfulness (not sure what the appropriate word is!) to say that instead of trying to steal our thunder over this by saying "Oh but Australia's done really well too!" #ANZACsRule :-) Stay safe & well out there!

Well half my family have joint citizenship in oz. And we can do trans tasman travel now. Isnt that cool?

@@snapdragon9300 I think it's planned but not allowed just yet. Definitely looking forward to being reunited though! Get ready for an influx of Aussies. We are busting to get out of the country for holidays again!

So true

Try not to mention his name at all, it'll make him irrelevant

I think (and hope) we can get used to more of this in the near future thankfully.

@@robbiebunge859 LOLL uh 70 mill + people voted for him FEVEROUSLY. he's not becoming irrelevant anytime soon unfortunately.

No trump talk? Were you even listening? Who do you think he was talking about that failed america by spreading covid? Duh!

I mean that is his usual response

@Karma Geddon.... coincidentally that was also his response with Stormy Daniels

@@TheExvangelicalCat yeh, that's what I was going to say too, that's how he responds to everything! Add lazy in there too!

Who's T*****? Do you really think trump is gonna go after you? A commentator on youtube? "Shh! Never say Voldemort's name aloud!"

​@@paulpolpiboon9535 youtube does. People who upset the site get phantom botted for using various keywords & trump's one of them, so they probably had to cencore themselves for the post not to vanish. Try it yourself if you like, say his name, country's name & an insult all in one sentence & watch your post go p****

i went "aww" when i read this comment

@@moodybassist 😂😂😂

Evie giggling still beats sitcom sounds.

@@kenbrown2808 Agreed!!