Steven Seagal Movie Today You Die Is So Bad It's A Crime Against Humanity - Worst Movie Ever 

Hes a black man trapped in a white mans body.

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Did seagull just use the scene from the van Damme movie "the order" when he shoots the wire at the building beginning of the movie 😂

@@Pressplay267 Certainly possible as apparently the high speed chase in Las Vegas was actually from the 1998 movie Top of the World and some viewers believe sections of this movie were from the Fast and the Furious films.

do you have the '13 dead men' one? that one was hilarious.

We are almost 300k strong

Somebody has to lead the charge.

Do I know you? GUT BUSTING!!!

INDEED!!!

@RobbHerrera We all see a bit the movie and keep shut but he sensibly analyzes it.

It’s a Seagul movie, so worst.

Lmao 🤣

They cured all childhood illnesses but Seagal's movie career caused new ones to form.

Classic 😂

Space ice is a comedic genius 😂

“The Sun is for losers! I don’t need it!” Steven Seagal.

I didn’t get that one.

@@whothennow24 The explosion shot was at night.

Or The Three Stooges

lmao

When I heard this line I for real almost choked 🤣🤣🤣

Freakin laughed out loud

😂😂😂😂😭😭😭 I'm dead that was too funny

🤣 couldn't stop laughing

😂🥲😂👍🏻

Kinda reminds me of Betty A.K.A Master Pain from Kung pow...🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@@blk99solja You're clothes are black!

The Jacket Switcher

And him replaying stock footage of the same punch over and over again through the entire movie was the icing on the cake 😂

Nah he killed all the security guards because he was in the zone and his bloodlust was in full control of him at that point. Nearly every movie has scenes where his bloodlust runs free Edit: nevermind I thought it was seagull doing the killing of the guards. He did kill a lot of innocent people in the next scene though

The dude was probably "Who is this crazy fat fck and how did he get in?"

""What the FCK, is GOING onnnnn" LOL

The amount of comedy that he makes from it, is well worth his torture.

The man is hero. Because of his work, we all sleep better at night.

He is a seagullsologist. Pity the sacrifice this scientist has made to his IQ. Poor bastich

The Space Ice Guy deserves to be an action hero for this.

Steve'N'Seagulls is a decent parody band!

Thank god.

Seagal has to have false images in his movies that he thinks will make him look good in real life. He's a weird character

@Peter T But the SIGN tho, like a goddamn toys r us.... I crying!

looked like it was from a dollar store..hilarious

A children's hospital near me had a going out of business sale. I got two children for 30% off.

It took Segal and his gifts as a writer, director and action hero for us to re-evaluate the talents of Neil Breen and Uwe Boll.

Yeah unfortunately Seagal is so full of himself that sometimes behind the scenes he harms some of the stunt team in the movie Exit Wounds he sent a guy to the ER for stitches according to Michael Jai White.

I have never felt so confused 😂😂🤣🤣

The original fast and furious 1 crew made a cameo in them street racer cars...did anyone see

This movie was filled with so much bullshit I actually didn't even register that as odd. It's like the movie deteriorated my brain to such a level that I became numb to absolute insanity.

@dejuren I had this revelation after watching a number of these Seagal videos: Steven Seagal experiences these whack narratives in his dreams, and later on writes them into scripts for these "films". Why else would this shit make no sense to anyone but Seagal himself?

@@chillinoutmaxin4630 nah he just comes up with a few different scenarios that he thinks would look cool on screen, then strings them together one after the other with no concern for plot

Lmao I saw that too thought they looked familiar

For a few seconds I thought he was splicing in FnF footage for comedy... nope it's the actual movie

Only the Jetta was from the first movie. The RX7 & Supra were from 2 fast 2 furious

@@xsingxhaix Even the RX7 is from the first film, that was Dom's car.

@@enditakamweneshe6428 not the same one. Look at the wheels and decals.

Yup, the same stand-in he killed off in Shadow Man, a year later.

Literally. I was laughing my ass off when I saw that scene

oh. these movies aren't?

Is that the real Steven Seagal? Oh dear

The whole movie is like a spoof movie but with no coherence. 😅

@@professor4202 his movies are syphilis

Hahaha!!!! Me too!!! 🤣🤣🤣

Oh, darn Those kids aren't getting sick anymore Just awful

Facts

Yea me too lolollollolol

@@iceonthesun8880 yep, everyone's cured. Time to call it quits.

I knew it was gonna be good when the scene was prefaced by that nonchalant “The first bad guy he pulls out of his ass-” 😂

The dumbest jokes are always my favorite

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😅😅 i can’t stop laughing

@@SpaceIce i love your voice do more movies please i beg you do more movies

@@SpaceIce LOL ''SUDDENLY SEA GULL GOES FULL NINJA IN OTHER APARTMENT ''

I have some news - our sun is going to go out some day. The good news is that probably won't happen for another billion years. But no worries, Musk's great great great great great great great grandkid is going to come up with warp drive so our great great great great great great great grandkids can get their asses to another solar system with Earth-like planets that don't have civilizations advanced enough to wipe them out upon arrival!

Yo I busted a gut. I remember seeing this movie... utter trash. The fact that he constantly wears long leather dusters and always rests his hands on his massive gut is hilarious.

@@blaxpoitation8528 "utter trash" 🤣

gotta cover that gut....

To lazy to get a uniform for the scene shows what a lack of respect Seagal has for filmmaking and the audience.

It's obvious he's insecure about his body and didn't want to wear uniform that would show his fat grandpa physique, so even in scenes where it didn't make sense for him to wear loose clothes and switching jackets he just did it anyways

"...and it's clearly a completely different person!"

There’s no way that scene was really in the movie. I refuse to believe it.

That's almost on a Chunk Norris joke level of stupid.

12:34

Sensai Seagull causes reality to malfunction.

Could have been the basis for a Twilight Zone episode?

😂🤣me too!!!!

🤣🤣🤣🤣

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 hahaha 🤣!

😂😂😂😂😂😂

😅😅😅😂😂😂

@@davidjob4909 surely that can’t b true?

It was probably his double.

I think he was trying to impersonate a homeless person rather than a murder perp, but it didn't work. That might have been the most logical scene in the whole movie.

Nahh he fell asleep on set while cameras rolled and they all agreed it was best that way @@raylopez99

That wasn’t acting. Seagal fell asleep during the take. Walking is tiring.

He's like a kid that starts a story with Santa Claus and tooth fairies and finishes with dinosaurs and zombies, but for some reason it all makes sense to him.

Seagal doesn’t need plot. The movie relies purely on his natural charisma.

I just lost it there too 🤣

yup that’s where I couldn’t hold it back. holy fuck…

Belter

Tell me about! I’m still crying🤣

Nice catch lol

😂😂😂

His flexibility on the set is astonishing.

Because Seagal ain't about that life :D

@@einantassteinas7038 (in Space Ice's voice) And wears whatever the fuck he wants!

Is it laziness ? Is it so he can write off his clothing as business expenses ? It's probably both.

Well it's HIS movie THEY'RE in, so if they didn't let him I guess he'd just kill them. 😂

for real?

And she doesn't even mention it 🤣🤣🤣

I’m thinking why big red from the five heartbeats had such a tiny role in the film lol

@@ralphwiggum1982 gotta love Big Red ❤️

@@ralphwiggum1982 He had to keep yo his business hours. 9-5

Seems like she was actually the most successful person in the movie. She managed to get a guy convicted on charges that weren't even her job to investigate.

@@t1p9d Evidently, that sometimes happens as well.

you hatin

What movie were you watching? She said "Yeah, it happens." Why do people add in words that weren't ever used?

There's a Chuck Norris joke somewhere in there.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

They must be having a sale.

LMFAO at the term "second hand embarrassment*. I've never heard that before, yet I 100% relate when he says that line. It felt awkward ASF. Kudos to the actor for delivering it without laughing. Lol

Killers always have asthma. Maybe.

No default walk for races, just difficulty settings

@@rashb3994 in Germany we have a word for that, being "fremdschämen" and I love it.

Lol at the fact that Steven Seagal probably thinks each race has a different walking animation

Or even an office chair. Which is technically should to be easier than a bathtub.

@Jimbo Bimbo Yea, lol. Thats why I said office chair. What a joke of a human being. Sad that he has probably screwed a lot of people over in his life. Is this part of his karma? Being a Hollywood laughingstock?

@@lukeuseforce Guy seems like he would have zero problem screwing people over and have no qualms at all cause as far as he’s concerned he is superior .Demi gods don’t keep promises to peasants

@@lukeuseforce Kinda guy who’s opening line would b You know you’ve just became the luckiest girl in the room

@@darrenstopper1806 Oh yeah, Steven is such a POS. Definitely a narcissistic womanizer

Man I died laughing....

and then they stopped by the prison-taylor to make it into a long-sleeve shirt.

😄

The one thing never explained anywhere in the movie is how they set up that escape plan or even how they were contacted. I mean they had everyone involved... and I mean EVERYONE in the prison involved somehow where they masked the escape with a fake food fight, then somehow bought this helicopter that was paid off and the pilot paid off.

“Dreams r symbolic”was brilliant.like the way he said it he musta thought. that that line was so deep and meaningful yet cryptic and endearing .Id bet money that line was all segal.And woulda fought hard to get it in the film and thinks it’s the best line In the entire film

@@darrenstopper1806 I'm sure it really is a proud achievement for Segal, like was the Oscar community sleeping that year or what lmao.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

I doubt Seagal even knows the definition of "absurdity" , or "devolvs"... or "movie" 😄

I have no clue that was a thing either

Walks like a black man breathes like a killer 👀

lmfao

Lmfao 🤣

YOU FUCKIN PURCHASED ONE OF THESE MOVIES LMFAO IM DEAD HOLY SHIT DEAD.......WAIT AND YOU SAID THE LAST ONE LMFAO SO YOU PURCHASED OTHERS LMFAO DEAD DEAD DEAD

Wtf

How did you not get embarrassed as fuck buying this in person?

That is like buying teletubbies dvd, to remind ourselves how f*cktop we were

Lmaooooooo

I think you meant he's made OF dough

I refuse to give this waste of a mother’s love any respect let alone the time of day.

An honest asshole, who's proud of being a world-class douchebag. That's rare these days.

Maybe not respect. I'll give him, a cookie.

Also, "for no reason what so ever,"

I love whenever Space goes “F*ck you!” Or just swears when you’re not expecting it 😂

“But, WHATEVER”

I also love his "Anyways ..", spoken in that snotty voice.

"I have NO idea why....."

A similar error with "the sun going out" is in the 1989 film Killer Angels, where a car explosion from the John Woo film Just Heroes is played as the scene before and after the explosion was at day, whilst the explosion is set at night.

Hey, everyone starts somewhere. If anything, it just proves that she had the talent to advance.

She was blackmailed.

She'll probably hire a team of hackers to erase all mention of it from the internet. So, make sure you have this video backed up somewhere :)

What about Randy Couture? All those actors playing in a Steven Seagal movie are destroying their career

@@prolabkdeze1514 It was his first role. After that, he appeared in The Expendables.

“Um, actually people use Adderall to get high sometimes, so screw people with ADHD, I hope they never accomplish a task again” -The DEA

You shouldnt have pills for ADHD as it is normal for an human. Nowadays, 90% of people say they are ADHD, that is an absurdity

@@prolabkdeze1514 it is an absurdity to act like the things you say are fact when not even 5% of the global adult population are ADHD

Wtf does Seagull say at 07:12??

I couldn't do it, space ice is a true hero

Are you talking about Space Ice or Seagal ? 😄

me too 😂😂😂😂 hahaha, brilliant!

I saw this.... this has me in tears😂😂😂😂😂

Average american watch them, no problem.

He’s making money, dude. I would gladly make an ass out of myself for millions of dollars lol.

He's actually being made to make these movies by the mafia as a money laundering scheme but he does get paid. Not sure if its a lot but a long time ago he was actually called for a sit down with some head honchos of the mafia because of something he had said or done and apparently he actually started crying because they threatened him and he went to the police for protection. He thought he was a hardened gangster after his first one or two movies but the mafia courteously set him straight

@@DH-xh3pg maybe once, but not constantly and how the fuck are these movies making money anyway

Seagals ego is bigger than any talent he possesses. Can't take a guy who shit his pants seriously.

Same thing with Mercenary for Justice.

I am starting to think that his movies are just for laundering money. No way it can be that stupid

​@@prolabkdeze1514I didn't know there were so many.........

Lol 😂 it’s terrible

It all started with “Exit Wounds”

“Are we alright?” “Nah …. We AIGHT…” Lmao

@@DH-xh3pg 🤣🤣🤣

Yeah he's a bit of a rappist himself

I was about to say the same thing… 😂😂

Lmfao i knew i wasnt tripping

Fast & Furious didn't exist when this pos came out

@@bunkelops yes it did dork lol this was over 2 years after the first one

@@bunkelops 🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️🙆🏻‍♂️

🤣🤣🤣

We dont see it on the movie but he is actually always teleporting in front of the ennemi with the perfect angle just for the sole purpose of intemidating them

Seagal is the king of Comedy!

This guy's reviews are hilarious they are just as good as Pitch Meetings but different and just about Seagal

I feel that he actually just wanted to take a nap so they just wrote a scene around it.

Thats a few of his movies

Me too but wtf was that all about. Why whould they randomly throw those cars in there 😂

@@user-ph5xl3wv8z Apparently the high speed chase in Las Vegas was actually footage from the 1998 movie Top of the World so I suppose it makes more sense at being randomly included.

And a race war too! How PC-incorrect.

HE'S SO GOOD. STEVEN SEAGAL. THAT'S BADASS MORON!! YEHH FIGHT WITH NO WEAPONS AND WINS WITHOUT GETTING A SINGLE HIT.

NOT YOU SARAH THE TALKER ON THIS VIDEOS.😃

NO I DON'T SEE HOW AND DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY STEVEN SEAGAL IS BAD. HE'S GOOD. WINS A BATTLE IN COLD BLOOD JUST BY HANDS IN 5 MINUTES DOESNT MATTER. HE KILLS. THAT'S A COMBAT. WHAT??? HMMMM. IT DOESN'T SUCK. NO I'M SAYING THAT'S WHAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY. BUT STEVEN SEAGAL KILL THE FUCKIN SHIT OUT OF PEOPLE. IN NO TIME WHAT'S SO EVER WITH NO PROBLEM. ISN'T IT? SO WHAT'S WRONG? HMMMM??

THEN WATCH BARBIE DOLLS FOR THEM MEN. STEVEN SEAGAL IS A FUCKIN SUPER KILLER WITH HIS HANDS TOO GORY AND SHIT HE WINS WITHOUT AN ISSUE. SURE LIES CAUSE THEM ASSESS LIKE THIS GUY TALKS CRAPP ABOUT. I DON'T CARE NO NOTHING BAD WITH STEVEN SEAGAL. I UNDERSTAND WHAT???? HE'S A FUCKIN SON OF BITCH KILLER IN MARTIAL ARTS . VERY BADASS. I'M TELLING YOU. WHAT????? HMMMMM????