I grew up in an abusive environment. I was abused by everyone that I came in contact with. Parents, siblings, teachers, coaches and eventually employers. Because of my background, I decided not to have children because I thought I too may become an abuser, I wanted to break the cycle. I do not regret my decision.
Dan, thank you for sharing your experience with everyone. I'm so sorry that you experienced such a traumatic childhood. I'm glad you're able to address these issues and to live the life you want. You seem like a gentle, kind soul. My heart goes out to you.💛🙏🏽🌻💕
Really proud of you Dan, and it takes balls to tell your story. I think it's amazing that you are helping others out of your pain- 'To help heal others is to heal yourself ' X
My abusive stepfather died a couple of months ago from a brain tumor. All the old memories of abuse came flooding back. He abused me, but was worse with my brother. I was more abused by my mother who made me the de facto family scapegoat. When he died she lashed out and banished me from the family. As bad as they all are, it still tears my heart out. Hearing you speak, Dan, I can feel the pain in your voice, which echoes my own experiences. Thank you for sharing your story; it resonates with many of us.
I appreciate your story. I totally get it I was violently abused verbally and physically from my father as a child. But I broke that chain with my own child I said I would never lay a hand on them or call them belittling names I don't want history to repeat itself plus I know what it felt like. It was painful mentally and physically. I am finally healing myself.
I definately broke the cycle. I never hit my son when he misbehaved. In hindsight, i should have disciplined him by hitting him in only extreme situations. Hes now struggling with self discipline and honesty at 36 years old. When we avoid what we fear, that small.fear becomes this GIANT monster that you will.consciously avoid the rest of your life. The little fear could be as simple as competeing honestly for a job opening. Walking in there and presenting yourself with out any background help behind the scenes..or it could be as simple as imagining your future without a partner. Life can throw many Monkey Wrenches in your path. Avoiding the percieved "hard things in life", only put off your own self growth and development. Never fear being judged. Do what feels right to you in your heart.
Thanks for sharing what you went through Dani. Despite it all, you and your wife have built a beautiful family together. All credit to you because you have turned that pain into a Pearl.
So inspiring to hear you speak out Dan. “ other people are going to find healing in your wounds, your greatest life messages and your most effective ministries will come out of your deepest hurts” a favourite quote from Rick Warren Thanks so much for sharing, from a fellow mental health & wellbeing ambassador.
Thanks for being brave Dan & sharing. That takes guts & a real sense of self awareness. Other people who have experienced similar will appreciate you sharing ❤️
Yes, like my mother very verbally violent and physical. Your lucky you had support. Very lucky l am 67, and just talking up now. Blessings & Salutations 😢
My son was two years old putting him in for his bath I must have raised my hand suddenly and he backed away in fear, that was forty years ago and I can’t erase that memory, I only pray he has. Although I never hit my child I was always suffering from a hangover I would sometimes yell and act out. After that incident I immediately sought help and therapy, when you’re negatively affecting your child’s well being it is time to stop and get help, it is available
Thx for sharing your story, Dan. You are brave for sharing this painful account of your very stressful upbringing. Your willingness to be open ministers to us who hear your story and relate to it.
It helps when the people who have been abusive can acknowledge it when you are older .I grew up in a tinderbox with my mother and grandparents. My grandmother had the most violetn temper i ever knew, she went to her grave still believing she couldnt do wrong for right. I don't feelt anger or bitterness because that does hurt the self. Can't say i feel much love,in fact cant say i feel any at all. I dont think a psychiatric ward is a place for kids to be . If their mother was in the midst of mania and depression that would be disturbing.
My dad was abused as a child, and he would often take out his frustrations on me (I was once beaten with a steak I could not finish, going to school with a cut behind my ear that I covered up by telling people I passed low under a tree branch; no one asked more about it). Also, he died just before Christmas when I was child and I felt like I was robbed twice. I don’t date, and have no interest in a relationship with anyone. My mother and brother know, but they don't really understand (my mother said she suspected something was happening, but she did nothing about it; my brother said it was just his kind of parenting). I keep to myself and I love my guitar and writing and have a job I like. Everything I have heard here is spot on. I may never be in a relationship, and I may spend my life alone... ...but I am still here. ❤️🩹
