TEDxYYC - Dr. Megan McElheran - Trauma Change Resilience 

I have observed, experienced and realised that trauma in childhood creates the closet from which we select our responses as adults. My childhood was full of abuse, lies, darkness and trauma. Hence, the aim was subdugation, which resulted in a lack of understanding so as to deal with most things including grief and trauma. The alienation from family is not a problem as it is where all the trauma was birthed. I have had best results from high doses of omega oils such as hemp seed, acupuncture, organic diet, regular exercise everyday, creative ventures, prayer and EMDR. Removing negative, narcassistic or toxic people from your life and replacing with positive, loving and supportive people is paramount. Loving self and focus on the words used by self and others is a way to break the code of trauma. If we do not feed our negative responses they will eventually die. We deserve to all be beautifully happy.

This was one of the most helpful videos on trauma I have seen. The fact that McElheran chose to illustrate trauma not with someone who personally survived rape or tsunami or horrific physical abuse, but the traumatic loss of a family member made it so much more relevant and moving. Her compassion for her clients amazes, though it ought not to...The fact that such compassion is relatively rare is a stunning indictment of American society not to mention the "helping professions."

She's right. - Vet with crazy PTSD/depression/anxiety/insomnia, but winning the battle!

Wow. What a revelation for me. Spot-on. It has taken 35 years for me to realize this. Thank you. "Trauma fundamentally involves disconnection." I hope she is still working for our vets.

Reaching out to someone is the only thing that is working for me. Having someone there who is empathetic to your struggle, someone non judgmental, someone who will go out of his/her way at the drop of a hat to help is what is saving my life. Meds made me unfeeling and left me feeling brain dead years later (spark and creativity are gone. I wonder if they damage your pineal gland), my family just wanted to pawn me off on someone else. I felt I was living with unempathetic strangers who were waiting for me to 'get over it.' I felt like a frightened shelter animal and my husband came and he is fighting my battles with me and I have made more progress in the past 6 months than I have in the 8 years I have been struggling with ptsd from 17 years of childhood trauma. She is right - you see the world as a scary place, you don't trust people, you cut yourself off from the world around you thinking you are protecting yourself. As my anxieties became worse I developed agoraphobia and experienced periods of disassociation and deep depression. My husband is the ONLY person I've met who is making me get to the bottom of my problems and to show me that the world is a beautiful place. He is patient with me and understands that progress is slow, but he is always praising my progress and makes me feel strong when I am feeling weak, like laying in bed all day crying and in pain because of panic attacks kind of weak. This video really hit home for me. It's like I was one of her patients......

I wish I had found this video years ago, but I'm glad I found it now. Thank goodness for RU-vid, and modern technology in general.

Bad things do happen to good people!

This talk is filled with so many good quotes!

The speaker explained perfectly what happened to me many years ago. All the trauma from childhood coupled with a series of other cumulative trauma resulted in withdrawal for me from everyone except my husband, and our daughter. I am so grateful for God's healing through the people I have met along the way. There is help.

Megan's talk has told me what no one else has done in the medical field. I was hit by a vehicle in 1952 as a young Officer in the Signal Corps I have also been injured by the loss of my family and even in the Court. Thank you Megan

I always feel that children should be taught how to relate with self and others as a PRIORITY. We've got to start somewhere... lest 'the sins of the fathers' be passed down to the next generation, as they have been for thousands of years.

One of the most wise Tedx Talks ever made. Amen to Megan Mcelheran,she is very empathetic to what being human is and very observative of costs of neglect and denial of human feelings like such sadness, fear, doubt etc. I hope all mental care workers takes same attitude so we won't find ourselves more vulnerable and helpless when we seek help....

Wowee I just heard 2 minutes of this woman speak. What an amazing woman. Takes a very special person to do as she does and not pretend to do what is needed.

Thank You. I am working through trauma and have been stuck for years. I force myself to engage with others though it is painful. I usually want to hide at home when I don't have to be at work. I am starting EMDR therapy this week. I go to work every day, and I force myself to do things that used to give me joy, or new things that I hope will give me joy. It often doesn't work but I keep trying. I can't just allow myself to live in terror and isolation. It actually doesn't make me feel as safe as time goes on. It makes me feel more afraid to isolate and disconnect. This talk resonated so much for me. Especially where she talks about the integration of negative emotions, and the importance of expressing and feeling these emotions as just as necessary and vital as positive emotions.

So grateful for people that have the ability to work with severe trauma and educate the general public. We all win this way so thank you for sharing!

"if you are not happy, something is wrong with you" Wow. I love this. I want ALL of my emotions.

Dr. McElheran - great Tedxtalk, thank you for your hard work! I don't know about you, but I will probably continue to check my tedxtalk likes and comments in perpetuity. It's just such an honour to have the opportunity to share an idea with the world that you hope to change it in some way! I heard yours and it resonated with me. My husband watches them with me while laying in bed usually Saturday mornings As I have time to browse the tedx line up and get more intellectual juices flowing - I hope to get another opportunity to do one in as mine was a slither of what I wanted to say. You're right it's so hard to whittle it down to 15 - 20 minutes! Plus, I graduated 2 months later with my PhD and want the next one to reflect that. Not due to vanity but investment in blood sweat and tears! Hard work has intrinsic value but without recognition sometimes we lack the motivation to keep challenging ourselves. It is a balance! Wish we could grab a coffee and chat - if you're ever in the Cayman Islands?! Take a look at mine and maybe we can start a dialogue I am also a mental health professional specializing in trauma. Glad to "meet" you. Thanks again for sparking my mental filter this am.

Wow - what an amazing speech! I would love to see her in a more professional production than the one she was provided with back at the time.

Beautiful talk, brave woman ~ thank you for sharing your insights & for the work you do to help people. 🌸

Thank you, Dr. McElheran.

She's a superhero. Only she doesn't save people with physical injuries, but psychological ones.

It'd be good if ones can find a person who they can connect to at the emotional level. Reality is .... traumatized people are so insecure that they yearn for emotional comfort so much that often time they go to the wrong person. And then, the pain continues and deepen.

Best trauma recovery video I have ever seen is the Trauma Trap on NewLife TV. Unfortunately it cost $9 a month subscription but it was life changing. For many who have been abused they have the false belief that something is inherently wrong with them and this they we're abused. According to this video all healing takes place because of a friend or relative they can depend on. That helps but it can not fix the negative lies a person of trauma believes in themselves.

That's the best talk i have seen on the topic. It's empirical and not some random chatter, it's very logically constructed and instructing to why empathy (emotional or cognitive), even though potentially dangerous for us is still more beneficial to us as a species than not having it. It gives an explanation to why we ate ever able to Adapt ane Thrive in this world where trauma is inevitable and commonplace. It gives an explanation to why we need to embrace suffering instead of hiding from it in an effort to be constantly happy.. Watch it

I have experienced horrors. I am 65. I live in Ohio. I have attempted many times to talk to a therapist. They sit stoically, silently, and watch the clock. I have no shame (and I could), no self-judgement either. I do have silence, as no one in the professional setting is willing to constructively, empathetically (read Brene Brown) listen. I am so tired of seeking someone specializing in trauma; I just find the best, prettiest, funniest thing in my life every day. So long.

I got that call she describes at 5:00 one morning from my sister-in-law, my brother who was fit and healthy and a comedian who kept me laughing since I was old enough to laugh was dead from a heart attack at just 44. My only sibling. I isolated myself exactly as described, and until recently was trying to OD and/or get hit by a vehicle, crossing without looking. Though we shared a good deal of sibling-rivalry, becoming older than him next month is no win... it is sad, surreal, horrifying, disgusting and tragic. I'd link to his youtube videos but I cannot handle the pain of watching him perform. How can a "live performance" be of my dead brother... without an illness to foreshadow it nor an accident or crime to blame? It doesn't make sense, yet it happened. The brain does not want to accept it, combining what is unreal into this reality... because it has no place that fits. Good luck to those who have experienced trauma on getting through, its a weight on our shoulders, a stealer of innocence we didn't know we had. We thought we knew it all, we that we saw it all, we thought we'd imagined it all. We didn't.

wow, a powerful message. thank you for that and for what you do!

Wonderful work! Excellent lesson and good thinks to lorn! May God bless you for your job!

Thank you very much Well said I am walking through this now and it was helpful to hear it acknowledged

Dear Megan, Thank you for sharing your experience and knowledge in the field. However, I work for a very large public services institution and I have been traumatised by a psychopath who is my line manager. I have listened to your talk over and over and the message I get every time I listen to you talk is that "it's not their fault that they are psychopaths, we have to be compassionate towards them", although I agree that it's not their fault but YOUR (professional) talk is very dangerous in the sense that it gives these institutions a valid reason to sweep the abuse that thake place in their walls in the name of "compassion" and at the same time these psychopaths that distroy people's lives get protected and thrieve, continue climbing the corporate ladder while crushing the "little" people like myself, who have no choice but to keep silent. In contrast, I found Lindsey Roy's talk very useful "what trauma taught me about happiness".

Brilliant contents and thank you for sharing it in such a comfortable easy to relate to way.

An intelligent and beautiful speech

Excellent talk, I'm using it in my series of articles on sexual assault and have found it personally helpful as well, Thank you for giving us this.

Amazing speech!

This was fantastic, thank you ❤️🌻

Thank you very much. You've explained trauma in much better terms then my counselor for the last 6 months. What are you thoughts on EMDR treatment?

awesome decision to include this topic, this was a very informative lecture !

Excellent presentation and presenter!

Impressive! Keep on the good work, thanks for sharing your experiences, I learned a lot in these 16min!!!

That you for sharing this was helpful

Great guide

Wonderful lecture.

well done Megan!

I think she may have to forgive her self also and heal having to carry out the work that she has been given.

I would love to explore the idea of how I could help others with PTSD. I am in recovery after CBT, and regularly use EMDR and many other tools, and added massage to help heal PNES seizure knots. I also pursued skills and loves to bolster accomplishment and joy to boost happy sensations. For me, a mentor to see on the way through recovery would have made me feel hopeful and not so alone. Any thoughts?

I agree totally...

Compassion

I opted to listen for the information. But, what a trainwreck of a speech and video. Next time I'll read it from wiki since reading is all she did.

great honest real talk 👍 ruined by closeup maniac

TED camera people... less face close ups please

Does anybody care about trauma victims of domestic violence?. Twenty years since I was determined to be disabled by my injuries. Medical Providers are quick to mis-label their patients; and eager to issue meds with side affects worse than the condition being treated; but leave it up to the patient to seek therapeutic treatment. As a result, despite having a Law License and skills honed during this "healing" period, I am still bound by PTSD and and TBI; yet a #Vanderbilt University primary care physician Pareira dares to ridicule and disparage me, "Surely you don't think you are still affected." Those matters you complain about are probably nothing. When I demonstrated my lack of confidence in them; they terminated me as a patient, alleging noncompliance. So I don't won't to be a guinea pig for experimental drugs; as you deny me treatment that could possibly make a difference, Duh! Is there any hope for empathy and understanding? Or is there simply no money in it?

"we do not have control over everything" is her difficult lesson? What planet was she raised on.

The camera-work is terrible. shaky cam is for horror and action movies

@billbaker @lance

This could , if referring to the fundamental hypotheses, be the typical talk of, say, a priest, even more so of a pastor of what, in Germany, is called "The protestant/evangelical church"------nice and goodwill (well paid) attempts for giving severely traumatized people some "painkillers" in the way of whatever shallow "comfort", advice along the lines..of: "Do you want another éclair?!"---- and, : "yes: pain pain and pain again--- must be so hard" ---"How horrid...we know you must feel shattered, but ...eh...but,..".come off it: there is NO BUT..., and all will basically be glad they had not be injured for life= life-sentence!!!...-----by suchlike even hard to listen to, gosh!!!, traumatic experiences--unfortunately often so severe, that the time comes no one will be there no more and until the last one "shellshocked" has tried to trust bluntly says stuff like "Now I have been hearing this often enough...I just cannot take more of it") Lady: it basically was a psychiatric, psychologist...well, "textbook"-----Blabla! We just do not live, less and less, in a society/culture...that offers "communal"(what?) help to get this shattered to his/her bonemarrow "connected again"--------especially if the kind of trauma derived from "having felt some "connection"...to then having to try to ccomprehend the uncomprehensible...i.e. that---BANG!!!--- the allegedly "nearest/dearest" for whatever reason...were the ones that, and on purpose!---made you hit the ground so hard, so relentlessly and, just as mercilessly then booting you----AND: you have no chance to defend yourself...or what has been left over from your self after having been destroyed ,--and all you then feel---in spite of trying to battle it and "go on"----is: death is worth dying! P.S. I know I could and did feel happiness, oftentimes even, though transient, but that is pretty much normal....even , though again normal: some rare, still....bliss! --------- Now I cannot even remember( !) what "being happy" felt like! Why not: yes, very nice...I`d like another éclair!

👍🏻❤️😔🙏🏻

she reminds me of Virginia Woolf

This broad is depressing

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