Telling My Boyfriend (CANCER) *tea with tiffanythinks* EP.3 

Welcome to Tea with Tiffanythinks on a Tuesday (EP3). If you haven’t listened to EP1 & EP2, I have linked it down in the description box with the ‘We Got This’ Merch link there too. I am always wondering what you’re up to when I post these podcast videos so let me know. Thank you for being part of my Tiffanythinks Family and for supporting everything I do - please SUBSCRIBE!! Instagram & FB: @tiffanythinks. Lots & lots of love, WE GOT THIS💙

Matt's reaction to you trying to push back is a clear picture of how he feels about you. Love does incredible things to people. You are blessed with an incredible partner and family, and we are all blessed to be a part of your journey.

I was in the waiting room when my husband got diagnosed with stage 3 cancer. I knew something was coming and could barely think straight the entire time. It hit me so badly and I was a complete wreck for months. Cancer's impact on a partner can be utterly massive. My husband was actually playing the cancer down but I could tell he was scared shitless. I have so much empathy for you and Matt because it's a truly grim card to draw. I'd only been married one year when my husband was diagnosed, in the first year of my PhD, too. Life can throw you some absolute grenades. Having the support you do is really amazing and I hope you feel our love. Your family is incredible and I wish I were as lucky to have so many supportive, friendly faces. Take such good care. I know how it feels if only from the perspective of the carer/spouse. Big love xx

Most men in Matt’s situation would have left. He is a rare one, one of the massively good ones. He TRULY loves you and wants to be by your side no matter. He is a keeper!

Tiffany, some people live until they're a 100 and they never find the kind of love you have in your life from your partner and your family. So you are an extremely lucky person 💙

Matt is such a gem! It's a sad reality that a lot of people do leave their partners when this sort of thing happens. You are so blessed and the people around you are so blessed to have you too x

Honey I remember the day my boyfriend found out I had cancer. He stood at the foot of my bed n cried. We were both older. I was 53 n he was 71. We finally found happiness n I got sick. He was my strength n love

My darling Tiffany, today’s tea time with you made me cry. You and Matt are equally selfless, and the love you share is so very precious. You, Matt and Amma will continue this journey, and one day, you will be cancer free...and we will all celebrate 🎉 with you in style. My love is with you always, your friend Marilyn 👵🙏🏻😍🌈

My husband would sometimes joke earlier in our lives about cancer. Because of Covid, he got the news on the phone, so when he told me, I yelled at him to stop joking… but when I saw his face and saw tears, I realized it was serious and I could not believe it, my whole world shut down… this was January 2021, after 2 major surgeries and on a year plan of targeted therapy, we got the all clear May 2021 and October and December we got the all clear and I was like yes he beat it… It’s 60 days now he is gone and everyday I cry and I think it will get better but it just gets worse… If Matt is reading this, the only advice I can give is tell Tiffany everything, how you feel, totally everything, I wish someone had told me this last year… have hope, people beat cancer all the time but also live like today is your last day and tell her everything you want to say… Tiffany I pray you beat this… with all my heart I am praying you beat this, we all need a little bit of hope and need miracles in our life’s, and I want this for you so my hope in God…

Sending love to our beautiful Tiffany and Amma..Not forgetting Matt!😀

Matt is the right person to talk about, true unconditional love in relationships .

The love between you and Matt is so evident each time we see you together, you are so fortunate to have found each other, many people go thru life and never find "THAT" person. I have been married to my husband for going on 48yrs and he is going thru my battle with cancer with me and I honestly don't know how they do it, I have tried to put myself in their shoes and it must be so traumatic for them as much as our diagnoses was for us. I loved hearing your story Tiffany.Thanks so much for sharing it with us. Love and Hugs

It's funny how Matt went from mystery man to winning all of our hearts. You're both amazing people. I'm so glad you found each other 💞

You and Matt are made for each other. Such a beautiful couple. You will get through it. WE GOT THIS 💙💙💙

your darling Matt is truly darling - You've got this tiff!

I’m from Belfast Northern Ireland and have been following ur story for a while now. Ur an inspiration, if more people were like u the world would b a better place Loving the vlogs and podcasts ❤️

Matt and Oma have really had your back, through all of this. Hug them as much as they hug you.

We got this! I love the format, Tiffany don't change, because it feels like a conversation. Awesome. Getting to a 100k would be amazing, let's do it!!

“This is what love is.” What a beautiful message amongst so much upset. ❤️

Hi beautiful Tiffany! I was journaling when I saw your video pop up but now I'm ONLY watching your video because I like to focus on your journey. It's very important because I'm terminally ill without hope and I've been going downhill very quickly the past 6 to 8 months. I'm having a very very difficult time, even as a Christian myself, accepting it. But I want you to know is to remember the God knows our journey he's prepared you and your family and Matt to be strong enough to handle this! So I don't want you to worry about that part of it. Try to remember to hand it over to God when it gets to be too much for you. That's why I like journaling through this journey of mine. I've been journaling for years but this past 2 years has been such a different type of journaling for me. Save your strength and love your family gives me hope because I all I have is when children and my grandchildren and my siblings. Although, all of them are so scared of losing me that they are distancing themselves from me and making me very very lonely and sad but I can't control that and that in itself has been very difficult. So once you to understand that your family has been there for you and God is making sure of the strength that you and your family have is great enough to do this!

"this is what love is" - that moved me to tears. Matt is an absolutely amazing man - you are so lucky and you so deserve his love and care and im so glad you are so strong together - you will get through this - we are all rooting for you - xxxxxxxx

I’m 6 minutes in with watery eyes listening to how Matt reacted to you pushing him away. Also to answer your question, I’m cleaning (or try to at least!). I love these episodes - keep them coming! 💙💙💙

Precious Tiffany, you are a light in this world. I am too going through cancer treatments, and it is difficult. Your sharing and precious spirit brings strength to my own race. Thank you for that! You are a gift!💝

Hi Tiffany! I can relate about telling loved ones. I think I was so thankful to have a diagnosis. Although I had been told 95% chance it wasn’t cancer, then find out it’s stage 3 cancer. I just matter of factly called my loved ones and told them…including my husband of 17 years while he was at work 🤦🏻‍♀️ At the time, you just feel numb and want to move on to the next checkbox to get better. It’s ok though and just a time stamp in your journey 💕

Such a wonderful man! They are rare and you are so lucky to have each other. Take one day at a time! Between your Mum and Matt you all balance each other very well. Love and prayers for you all.

WE GOT THIS 💙

Tiffany……you’re a breath of fresh air. I was in hospital yesterday having inj’s in my back but listening to you today made me forget what I’d been through and it’s helped me put my life in perspective. Your conversation with Matt in the car telling him to go was a natural response when you’ve been given health news like yours. Matt had already made up his mind he was not going go away but stay with his special loved one and go through it together with Amma and your lovely family. You are an inspiration Tiffany……We Got This💙

Hi tiffany, I had to tell my fiancé shortly after getting engaged that I had breast cancer. I finished treatment over a year ago and you have made me appreciate my position so much. I dreamt about these days. I can’t wait to see you reach this point with your darling Matt! Lots of love xxx

Tiffany I want to tell you that you are heaven sent. I discovered your videos last night and I believe God has put you on my path. Tomorrow I’m getting a endoscopy and I have a feeling I have stomach cancer. Honestly the idea of having cancer really makes me depressed and scared but as you said about breaking the news to family really worries me. I don’t know how I’m going to tell my husband, children, parents and only sister. You have helped me prepare myself emotionally and are giving me hope. Thank you for showing your strength, love and honesty. Keep me in your prayers I’m praying for you 🙏

The reason you were blunt sounds like you had put up your armour to protect yourself and everyone else. It’s natural in normal everyday life, but with huge life changing news it’s completely understandable. Your relationship sounds super strong and supportive, I’m glad Matt has been able to be your rock through this journey

You are the sweetest soul, Matt was part of Gods plan for you. He put Matt in your life at the time he knew you would need him. The fact that you found out some of the worst news of your life, and you were concerned with him and his well being, speaks volumes. I can't wait for the day when you are cancer free and telling us all about yours and Matts wedding, that will be my favorite episode of Tea with Tiffany.

I never ever comment usually but Tiffany we've got this!! You can get through this just have hope!! You're so much stronger than you think!!

Darling you ARE trying. We are so very proud of you for showing “love” to those of us who may have forgotten that sacrifice is part of love. You are a blessing to Matt & Amma- you are showing them that their love is so valued, you will suffer through so much to stay. They know you love them. 💙

Hi lovely. I'm very happy you got Matt by your side. He's such a trooper. Just the best. And you're so strong and handle this heavy journey with grace. If somebody can beat this it will be you. I believe that wholeheartedly. We got this 💙💙

You are amazing Tiff and Matt knows it. He's a sweet caring person who will always be there for you. You have a beautiful loving family too. 💐🌞😘

Thanks for sharing how Matt reacted to you having cancer. My ex told me that he did not want to go through another person in his life with cancer. It broke my heart. I was very blessed to have my Mom. Who was there for me every step of the way. I really believe God has brought you and Matt together to walk this path together. So that you two really appreciate everything he has for you both. I so look forward to Tea with Tiffanythinks. Thank you.

Dearest Tiffany, you are so inspirational. I'm from South Africa and my youngest sissy got diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer recently. Thank you for sharing your journey and for being vulnerable. So much love to you, Oma and Matt❤️🙏❤️

This is such a generous pod cast, sharing these tough moments with us. There is no “right way” to tell those that love you this hard news. You just have to be courageous and do it which is what you did. Don’t have regrets about how communication happened. Be proud of yourself and your family that you could be honest, raw and upset together instead of in isolation. I love hearing you say you are proud of yourself. You should be!! As should Matt, Amma and all your family. You continue to teach your TT Family how to face the toughest of times. We are all on your team We Got This.

I also somehow tried to get rid of my partner when I was hospitalised for 22 months. I wanted him to have a life. I was cruel and brutal, listing all the things he would have to put up with (no children, stoma, IV nutrition every night etc.). I even gave back my engagement ring. He stayed. He told me that he’d rather have me at my worst than not at all. That’s when I knew that I am, despite everything, the luckiest woman in the world. Your Matt is just like my Etienne.

Thank you Tiffany for sharing your journey with us. I'm so glad you have your family and Matt. WE GOT THIS !!!! ❤️

You are such a strong woman-i have a whole new appreciation for you and your journey since you've started the tea with Tiffany thinks series. Please don't change a thing and know we're here for you-from one cancer survivor to another "we've got this" 💖 (p.s. my "we've got this " shirt collection keeps growing!)

Tiffany you are a born orator,you should have your own show! I hope this opens up many opportunities for you in this field. Matt's a keeper and so are you. We are all rooting for you and your amazing family.

How did u meet? What a lovely story, full of love and encouragement. I’m driving to work and drinking my Starbucks. My husband and I pray in mornings together and you are always in our prayers.keep pressing on; I shower you with Mark 11:24 and Jeremiah 29:11.

Praying fervently for your healing while watching your vlog. You have a very supportive and loving Amma & Matt. “We Got This” Take Care always Tiffany!🙏🙏🙏

It is fabulous hearing you talk about your journey. I could listen to you all day. Its so healing for everyone. I am drinking Lavender tea and sat with a little kitten (I will name her Tiffany) after you.....:) You got this. Matt is great and you deserve each other. Wonderful future you have together.

With all the sad memories let's have some happy ones as well. Let's know how you and matt met and how you both got together. N by the way, I was sitting in the face of a table fan while listening to you as I am boiling in the UK.😰

Matt wanted to be part of your life, good or bad.. This is what we call true love, you would have done the same if it was Matt who needed to go through this journey. It’s ok to cry Tiffany, it’s important you release the accumulated stress that you have. Your positive outlook and demeanour is purely because of Matt and the family that is surrounding you, so keep going my dear, one day you will be able to talk about this without too much emotion. We love you and pray for you everyday.

💗💗💗 tea w/Tiffany.. speak on whatever you’re led to speak on.. right now it’s very Organic, so don’t think to hard on it, 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

Tiff my sweetheart, We Got This !!!!!! sending you, Matt and Amma love and healing light from Johannesburg, South Africa. We are also in winter and its cold here.

This brought tears to my eyes, Tiffany! God bless you abundantly.

I am taking a break from working on a journal that I am making on commission for a friend who’s giving it as a birthday present for her daughter-in-law. I love these chats! You look so strong, Tiffany! Continued prayers for you and your family. 🙏

Hello sweet Tiffany, I’m drinking a soda listening to you today. Unfortunately there is no handbook that can prepare anyone how to react to such a diagnosis. You wanting to protect Matt is totally normal. You wanted him to have that choice. I’m so happy you have such a solid support group around you. Honestly, I regret the way I reacted with the news of my brothers diagnosis. I wish I had been stronger, I wish I knew what I could have done for him. I think it’s important for loved ones to know what you need from them. We want to be there in any way possible. Your honesty and openness will definitely bring light to these situations. Thank you so much for sharing. Prayers and hope for you always.

You and Matt are soulmates and you will have a long life together. Remember We Got This. Lots of love to all of you and big hugs.

Tuesday's have now become the evening I organise my medications for the upcoming week and watching Tea with Tiffanythinks whilst doing it, love watching, you are such an inspiration. xx

you have been so brave Tiff, I know how you feel, my hubby going through same thing just now only Prostate. It is hard Tiff but you are helping me.

I Would love hear how your beautiful mother stays so strong going through this journey again.

Hey my lovely, I’m currently listening to you while sharing an ice lolly with my 1 year old in my un air conditioned Uk built house 😝 loving you new podcast 🥰 praying for you and for your lovely family and praying you will be cancer free very soon xxx

I love these Tea with TiffanyThinks episodes! You are such a sweet person and I am so pleased you met Matt. I am painting a watercolour picture while watching you on my laptop, I am new to it and so I'm not very good at it yet. Your Mum and Matt are amazing, and I thank god you have them in your life to help you through everything! I can see how these blogs are helping you, I can see it in your face and its releasing built up feelings within you, it is good to talk I truly believe that! Keep strong WE GOT THIS! xx

I was dust cleaning my ceiling fan & changing sheets. Cried a bit. Which escalated to ugly crying & kinda bubbling nose crying. As a Mama myself, I went thru what Amma is going thru…. my son was diagnosed w/ testicular cancer at 25. It was a few years of hell, but like Amma …I didn’t leave my sons side. Mommas just don’t. I can honestly say my own cancer was easier to deal with than watching my grown baby go thru what he did. Love you Tiffany. Hug Amma extra tight for me today.

I’m sitting at my sewing machine, have my cup of tea and loving your podcast!! Thanks Tiffany for sharing!!

I just love listening to your videos! You’re such a bright light, positive person, and just genuinely kind person. I’ve been following your cancer journey from the beginning and sending so many hugs and positive vibes to you and your family. You’re a strong cancer warrior and I’m sure you’ve already helped so many along your journey. I’d love to hear more podcasts about your life, like where is your mom from, how did your parents meet, your childhood, schooling, etc. AND also Matt’s life! Sending much love and hugs to you from Houston, Texas! WE GOT THIS 💙 Please continue to share everything and anything! Although you consider us YOUR family, I feel like you’re MY family. Stay strong 💙 Much love, Victoria

We all should appreciate life like you are doing. My daughter lives with me and we help each other. I will be 72 next month and she is 44. I have a partner but she doesn’t. I am disabled and she isn’t but Hawaii is expensive and she moved back. We never know how life is gonna turn out. I pray for you and Matt and Amma.You got this!

This is a wonderful series. Every time I watch you now, I think “ oh yes, I need to take a drink of water“even when you don’t remind us in the video now I have this association of remembering to take a drink of water when I watch you! With this heat…. EVERYONE DRINK WATER! 💕💕💕

You are a total legend. You won’t be the same you can’t be ..it’s a big situation and of long duration .. I had BC stage 3 in 2020 and I have changed in every aspect of my life..some areas more than others .. I am so grateful to come out of it improved.. I doubt anything else could have unravelled me so beautifully the way cancer did. I love you and I look for your videos and I never mind what they are about they are always so sweet and heart warming ❤️

I pray that the Lord continue to bless you, Matt, and your family xo.

You touched on some wonderful points about how it feels emotionally to be going through all of this, and how it feels to push people away or how the guilt we put on ourselves feels. You also beautifully touch on how it changes you for the better in some ways, that it's important to see these things. You also find who truly is there for better or for worse in sickness and in health. Loving these tea talks. Gentle hugs As far as weather I understand you, I'm in New York and it's ridiculously cold in the winter and in the summer we feel like we are extremely hot at 80-90°, our house also wasn't built with central air conditioning (most aren't here) so we use window air conditioners and fans. For ideas, maybe how transitioning doctors while trying to accept your diagnoses was? How it all the sudden felt to have so much attention on your cancer with family and friends and learning to accept that that's bc they love you and care to be a part of the process? Maybe a tea talk on self care and how that changes and looks with cancer? Just suggestions, I love your channel so much and look forward to uploads 🥰

Hello sweet Tiffany, I’m drinking Gatorade and sitting in my air conditioned home , it is very very hot here in the states. Matt is an honorable man and bless his heart for meaning to stay with you through the difficult journey. I did wonder how this was affecting him but obviously he’s very much in love with you. I love seeing you and Matt together when your laughing and adoring each other. Please stay together and look to God for your strength. Love you all and keep on being positive about your recovery. 🍀🍀🍀❤️❤️❤️

I totally understand you trying to push Matt away; my partner had lost their wife to ovarian cancer and then less than a year after we met, I was diagnosed with the same cancer - even the same subtype - and I did the same. Partly through being in shock, but mainly through feeling so guilty at doing this to them all over again. Thankfully my cancer was an earlier stage and we hope for a different long term outcome, but the pain of putting someone you love through all that sh1t is very real and very powerful. Sending love and strength. You got this.

Hello dearest! I’m having a coffee here in Texas. Listening intently & seeing it play out in my minds eye. Feeling helpless, but afterwards so hopeful for you all. Praying those days never have to be revisited & that you ALL have the best lives ever💙 we got this💙

Hi Tiffany! I hope you are all staying cool. Here in New York, we are also having very warm weather. It's not the norm for us, so I for one am enjoying it! It is difficult for many people without air conditioning, especially the elderly 😢 You asked about what we are doing while watching “tea with tiffanythinks”. I have been eating my daily yogurt during that time. It's Chobani Key Lime, my one and only favorite! Thank you for sharing your experience of your early days after diagnosis. You said to Matt exactly what I said to my husband: just leave, it's not fair for you to be stuck with me and my illness! Tiffany, it was eerie just how similar you were to me! My illness isn't cancer, but it's chronic and a huge life changer. You, Matt and Amma are always in my prayers. Much love ❤️

I'm eating pizza on my lunch break while listening! Love and greetings from the state Georgia in the USA ❤

I was just sitting drinking sparkling water listening to every word about how you and Matt met, I'm so happy he is in your life. He loves you so much along with all your earth angels. Stay strong praying for you. Betty Rhode Island

Lying in bed drinking coke and enjoying my favorites. It’s 110 here in Oklahoma Thank you for sharing this part of your life Love y’all bunches

It is hot and humid; we usually run in the hundred’s in July and august so we aren’t surprised…well, as used to that as the -40 degrees F in the winter. (US/Minnesota). What am i doing while I am watching? Nothing else…100 percent attention! In your corner all the way, Tiffany. Love, granny in the Midwest!

We got this! I wish you the best brightest and healthiest future.

Thank you for having tea w me at work :) I love you and your family and darling Matt. I love hearing you talk and I also love your sense of humor ❤️ Would love to hear about you growing up , school years etc !

I’m listening to this while having a short break in Paignton on my balcony having a glass of wine 💙

I just found your channel and your story is so very touching. You are an amazing sweet soul. I pray for your healing and recovery. God bless you, Amma and Matt 🙏

It's going to be 90's today here in Spokane Washington. Every morning I sit by the pool, have a coffee and look for your new videos. You are so sweet and strong. You got this girl!

Watching from North Texas where is was 109° F today. It’s too hot for man or beast outside. Praying for you and your sweet Matt and family. 🙏🏼🙏🏼

Watching your vlogs has honestly made me more appreciative of the little things too 💙 you are an inspiration.

We have it pretty hot here in Alabama, in the high 90's. I do have a built-in AC unit. It is expensive to run, so I keep it around 77 and try not to move around too much!! I did hear on the news that you are breaking records with all the high heat your getting. Just remember to keep drinking water in even if you don't like the taste! ❤️

While listening, I’m doing some work and drinking a berry seltzer water. Love this format Tiff! It’s great to get both kinds of vids from you. Thanks for everything you do and for all the parts of your journey you bring us on with you. We’ve got this! 💖

Watching ‘Tea with TiffanyThinks’ with a DoubleDecker in one hand and a cup of tea in the other! Sending you lots of love Tiffany 🫶

I love the way you are doing these videos, there is no need to change it. Thank you for sharing your life with us, you are an inspiration and I am so happy when I see a video pop in! You asked what we were doing while listening, and I was rearranging a kitchen cupboard! Love from BC Canada ❤️💚💙💛💜❤️💚💙💛

There’s no right way to tell the people you love bad news. Don’t beat yourself up over it. I think it’s the hardest thing in the world. My dad told me kind of flippantly about his diagnosis walking through a parking lot to the car; it was very confusing to me, but I think he just blurted it out because he was thinking and thinking and thinking and it just came out like that.

Wishing you n Mark a lifetime of happiness... I'm positive you are going to get through this phase Tiffany. Love n Blessings ❤

You weren't mean u were doing what was right at the time.. Matt is a blessing. .. I don't know how many men now could even do just an inch of what he does.. I think you two are so nice together...

Sweet Tiffany, it is not cheesy that you and Matt felt the way you did about each other when you first met. Tthat is how it works when you find your soulmate. My husband and I had the same experience and we were 53 and 43, both married before. We have now been together for 22 years, through him having metastatic bowel cancer. You are exactly right, God puts the right people in our lives. It is up to us to recognize them. You are each other's angel. You've got this!!❤

I was excited when I got notified of the video.. I was waiting whole day to settle down somewhere to watch the video not being disturbed. I am so glad your channel is growing. I honestly pray to God that you get over this phase and have a lovely life ahead of you.. sincerely I pray.. ❤️❤️❤️from Australia

My life motto is not to wait for bad things to go away to enjoy life. But just do the best I can now.

You was protecting Matt ...you love him so much and at that moment you was sort of pushing him away because of your fear inside you! ...you are so Incredibly selfless and that was you dealing with what you were told! Matt is a beautiful human and his choice is to stay with you and be your Rock...it will of never entered his head to do anything other than to be with you! ...He loves you and you love him and that is so precious and you will both go through everything together and grow old together...❤...you both were destined to meet and that is a beautiful thing ...💙...your beautiful mum loves you dearly, you see that in your videos! ...we got this ..💙💙💙

I am eating my lunch while watching! Big hugs to you Tiffany!

Tiffany, you were angry. I truly feel deep down inside we know who we can trust/depend on w/ our anger. Speaking from my cancer experience initially the anger almost eats you alive. Almost worse than the shock of the diagnosis. Matt is your soul mate. I could write a book here, but I won’t. 😇. Part of you wanted to protect him too of what you felt you knew he’d be going through. Thank you for sharing this very very personal info with all of us. Makes all of us, (I’m sure) love you & Matt & Amma even more, if that’s possible. 💞🌸💞🌸💞🌸💞

If you feel like crying let it out! We love you💖

I can’t wait to see your journey in the future CANCER FREE!! I can’t wait to see you go back to work !! Marry your darling Matt!! And travel and live life to the fullest !!!!!! You’re such a beautiful person for always thinking of your family!! You and Matt have a beautiful special relationship!!!

The weather is crazy now. I heard how hit it is there and how unusual this is. I wonder if a window ac unit can be purchased in the UK. That would keep one room cool at least. What I am finding so strange also is here in NC, it is usually hotter than what we are getting this time of year. Some states are seeing over 100 degrees though and farmers there are having crops die from it. I hope things change for the better soon. I bet your house is beautiful being Victorian. I am glad you have this house and I am thrilled to know Matt felt the same as you, when you first met. I don't know what the future holds but I can tell you the loving relationship Matt and you have built is more than a lot of people have, even ones that are married. Also the time you have with your mother is very meaningful and you are right, you are surrounded with love. Matt, your family, and you are just good people and the world needs more of that. Much love to you all.

currently setting up august in my bullet journal, whilst listening to you talk. I love this little series your doing, you are incredible brave, and so well spoken. so much love to you & matt💕 such a beautiful couple x

Thank you for sharing. True love from your entire family. We all see why Matt loves you without conditions because we all live you the same. I'm in South Dakota and it was 106 degrees. You give me courage in my everyday life. Please take care of you. I can't wait to see the day where you don't have to say tik tik tik....God be with you.

Yayy! another episode 💙 I am listening to you while getting ready for an interview :)