them purposefully getting kids in trouble with their parents infuriates me. they have no idea how that home-life may be and may have contributed to more turbulence and ab*se at home. there's a reason their parents didn't know. if theyre not comfortable asking their parents for help, there might be a REASON.
as someone who experienced that first hand, that was my first thought when hearing them talk. it’s honestly so disgusting hearing them laugh and joke about how “that must of been an awkward ride home” having been that kid and having experienced the anger and punishment getting anything below a B would get
I knew a woman like this and I desperately tried to intervene (I worked in Childdaycare) and the kid was being tormented at home, taunted and made to feel useless and horrible. One day, the teacher came over to the dad and said (with this Valleygirl-gossipvoice) "Okay, so...what he's done _this_ day, it is AWFUL. First he soiled his pants...he SOILED HIS PANTS' and I looked around and saw kids hearing it, but I couldn't stop her from talking loudly. And then she continued; 'And he hit his friend in the face and they fought and they both have a wound now!" The father replied, in a chilly voice; 'That's it, you're grounded. You are not allowed to go to your best friend's birthdayparty, the gift will be given away and you will be grounded next week too!" I stepped in and said; 'Sir, please! Allow me to explain! They both playfought with a stick and accidentally hit eachother in the face. Both cried and consoled eachother and came for a bandaid. They are good friend and he's been speaking about that party forever! I don't think-' and to the delight of my manager, the man interrupted me and scolded me for 'intervening in his parenting' and he reminded me that I was not in charge of _his_ punishments for his kid. The son was just staring at the floor, silent tears. I often wonder if he's doing alright, I worry for him. He cried in the morning, to himself in the toilets, when he wet his pants. My manager even waved around the pants and showed everyone, saying that the boy was 'silly' for having accidents and that he was wáy too old. Which is true, it was disturbing, he was about 12, this was a clear sign of abuse, but saying it in front of the other kids? She clearly wanted him to be shunned by the rest and enjoyed taunting him and seeing his dad punish him. My mentor heard the story and decided to report the place and pull me out of that internship. She reminded me that it was not my burden to fix and that she'd report the place and that I had to care about my new internship now. But as said before, I worry about him still. I know he lives nearby, I hope to see him soon, just once, to see if he's doing better.
*_there’s a reason their parents didn’t know._* thank you. I found a box of old stuff from elementary school and reading through the reports adults were writing and showing my parents and how they were training me out of stuff that was tbh just me being autistic and in an emotionally unstable home. And it made a lot more sense to me the memories I had of throwing notes from my teachers in the bin during after school programs. It’s not that the punishment was inhumane. But it wasn’t appropriate or fair. I’m a very long way from acceptance still. That’s okay.
Many highly gifted children are disabled. They might not appear disabled but still have very specific support needs. Accusing a child of lying is so vile.
Gifted kid to autistic burn out is a very real thing especially for AFAB people. I was hyperlexic and learned to mask quickly through books so i wasnt given the support i needed to stay a gifted student and burned out quickly.
The amount of autistic children with above average intelligence is about 1.3%, while the amount of autistic children with severely low IS a whopping 65%. Autism is a disease, not a "different ability".
So true. Sometimes I think about what my life could have been like if I had been diagnosed as a child and actually got my needs met. I’ll never know, but I imagine that person would have been happy.
@@lulubellpop13 why's this specific to AFABs? (not that I'm assuming you think they're the only ones who can experience it but why bring up that distinction i mean)
@@purgxzur1 i’m probably not the best person to respond but it’s because afab children are under diagnosed with adhd and autism while amab children are over diagnosed i’m sure there’s a bit more to it but that’s part of the reason
So agree with both of you! I’ve moved beyond my schooling years but I’ve seen this same issue pop up in my adult life. Because my disabilities aren’t considered “severe” enough I don’t qualify for disability benefits despite the impact they have on the functionality of my daily life. I have had so much guilt my whole life feeling I’m not disabled enough for society or to able-bodied to be disabled just because of the spontaneity of my diseases and I’m tired of it
@@rrenneee same here! I went through all of school, struggled through college, and only just found out in the last year that I am considered disabled due to a SEVERE personality disorder and PTSD. I knew I had issues, but everyone just kept telling me i couldn’t possibly be disabled bc Im a pretty white girl who still got As and Bs in school. I would hide during debilitating panic attacks that I would get multiple times a day and throughout the night bc I was always treated like I was JUST overreacting. Now I’m a disabled adult and I have to advocate for myself and the imposter syndrome is so real. “What if I’m just being a brat?”
@@rrenneee if you’re struggling to do things the way everyone expects in general, you should be allowed to try another way safely and without judgement. Some people just don’t like the idea that they did everything they were “supposed” to without listening to their feelings when they see a person choosing routes for their own health and happiness.
As a kid that came from an abusive household, I was deeply depressed with undiagnosed ADHD and anxiety. My grades started falling, and I always dreaded parent teacher conferences because I knew I'd have to deal with more abuse afterwards. To hear that some teachers maliciously use those conferences against students to get them in trouble with their parents is so beyond disturbing to me
Yeah, the thing they seem to miss in these apologies is that there was more than ableism that made their statements messed up. The glee at getting kids in trouble with their parents. The implication that it's perfectly fine to make jokes about calling students stupid behind their back- you know, as long as they're stupid but don't have an IEP, I guess. It was all just gross. I'm sorry about what you were put through. I hope you're having a happy and fulfilling life now.
Yeah I think I got super lucky with teachers for the most part my parents and counselor were both “youd be so smart if you stopped being lazy” but most of my teachers were actually genuinely helpful I had one whod let me sleep in his classroom after school which I greatly appreciate. He even brought a small pillow to keep in there about halfway through the year. He held like extra help tutoring sessions and hed let me sleep in those since I wasnt noisy. I did have one teacher scream at me because I kept asking if I could move away from the air conditioner since the noise kept distracting me and she blew up on me for “lying” about the noise and just wanting to sit closer to the window. I think she was my only negative experience with my teachers (in highschool) elementary was hit or miss a lot of “hes combative” because I ask way too many questions so Im unsure if some of what I said did just seem combative or if it was an unnecessary question that the teacher couldnt answer like for example we did a lesson about a tree octopus as a “hey dont believe everything you read” but one of my teachers called hole because I was “being a smartass” by asking questions about octopi like “can octopi breath out of water?” Or “dont their bodies need support from the water?” Because to little kid me the jelly like look of the body was an indicator it required water in my eyes. I have since seen that isnt the case entirely
As a kid I had a swim coach who told my dad "there's something wrong with him" So I never got diagnosed till high school. I met that coach again and he apologized because he was 60 at the time and it was hard for him to say it right. I have issues because I wasn't diagnosed soon enough but I am very happy he learned
Same hat. As an AuDHD kid who went undiagnosed until my 30s, who was also having issues with abuse from multiple adults in my home life, I sometimes wonder if any of the teachers or other kids' parents ever look back, with everything we know now, and think 'Wow, we really dropped the ball there, we should've asked some fuckin questions'.
I still can't get over the mentality of "get to know your students... by asking their parents." Talk to your damn students. The IEP is for them, about them, WITH THEM 😤
I interpreted that part more as asking the parents what they’ve done that’s been helpful as a stepping stone but I definitely see where you’re coming from. As someone with adhd who worked with an audhd kid and advocated to get him the fidget toys he needed to help maintain his emotional balance in a loud youth center, the info I got from his previous aide and team only went so far. I was able to find what was most helpful by recognizing my own behaviors in him and talking to him about what he wanted to have available to him. Even though I’m not on the spectrum I’m thankful that my neurodiversity helped me figure out how best to help him with his and see the signs I knew neurotypical people wouldn’t recognize or think was just bad behavior
yeah that ain't it. i'm parent to 2 ASD/ADHD kids, one of who is intermittently non-verbal, & even my sometimes non-verbal kid should still be asked first. you ask me to fill in gaps my kids don't tell you or clear any info you don't understand. i'm not your primary resource unless my kid tells you (verbally or non-verbally) that i am.
plus, their parents could be abusive or mistreat them at home. You can’t ask someone’s parents about who they are, because the parents won’t know the full picture. Coming from someone who’s has a 504 and who has an IEP, TALK TO THE STUDENTS. They’ll appreciate you for it.
Yea, I think I get what she was going for but if she’s really trying to learn about disabilities and how to help her students… she has a lot more learning to do
the whole good grades thing is so ridiculous too. I had good grades all throughout high school AND I didn’t sleep, feed myself, take care of myself and my hygiene, or socialize outside of school almost at all. I got good grades but it took literally EVERYTHING out of me. Having good grades doesn’t mean you’re not struggling with school, usually you’re just struggling in different ways
I had good grades so I never got diagnosed with autism growing up and noone actually acknowledged any of my mental health issues even though... won't go into it but my time at school was horrible and I was in an incredibly dark place. I pushed myself to get the best grades since that was the only source of self esteem I had and if I wasn't the smartest, most talented, hardest working kid in my year I felt I was worthless. My grades were not exactly an indicator I was doing well.
@The-one-and-only-Fruitcake unfortunately I'm one of these kids. Many just they I need to "pay more attention in class". When I asked to not have to sit in a bright cafeteria during lunch, they gave me a dirty table with chunks of dirt on it. I have cleaning OCD (diagnosed) so when I complained, they immediately just assumed I am just a prissy little kid who wants special treatment. When I complained, they spray painted OVER the dirt. Again, I have OCD, a disorder I cannot control. So of course, I noticed this. So because I have trouble communicating my problems, I took pictures of this and I texted and emailed my parent guardian and after this, I was told by the Vice Principal "please don't take pictures anymore without teacher permission" (how would I get this with severe anxiety, selective mutism and audhd?) I felt extremely guilty and in the wrong and they put a tablecloth over it. Kids would drag their hands over my table and their chromebooks leaving marks on the table and essentially severely triggering my OCD. Also, a kid started sitting on my table on periods i didnt have lunch. A table I got for my 504 exclusively. They left crumbs all over the table every day, which is how I knew a kid was sitting there. When I wanted to complain, my mom said that I "shouldn't expect people not to sit at a perfectly fine table you aren't special". I stopped fighting. Also, my table was right above a large bright light, that wasnt dimmed at all. Just writing this makes me feel guilty.
@@redruby111 oh my gods, that’s awful. Im so sorry you have to go through that. You are not in the wrong for needing a clean table to yourself, your school is awful for not understanding why and just generally being stupid Also, take pictures. Do not let them stop you from communicating your issues, they are just trying to silence you instead of fixing the actual problem. I dont know where you are, but if you’re somewhere in the US and are doing well education wise (as in you know the material you’re supposed to be learning) and you’re in sophomore year of high school at least, see if you can take the GED test to get out of there sooner. That’s what i did, so I was able to move across the country with my mom, it looks better on resumes, and i can wait a couple years before going to college If that’s not an option, I would consider looking into smaller schools in the area. I lucked out in the middle of 10th grade, and transferred to a small school with about 400 students that fit my learning style so much better (severe ADHD), and that school was just generally more accommodating. I wish you luck, and I hope you know that you are not in the wrong. The school is. You deserve an environment where you can be comfortable in, and I hope you can get them to listen to you soon
Exactly! And its so hard to even get diagnosed in the first place especially for females, first gens, etc. its so hurtful when people say this, like I’ve already worked so hard for years just to be able to somewhat live comfortably and people still feel the need to disregard struggles within the community
Ive quite literally had doctors tell me "you dont look like you have x" after having been diagnosed with said condition that has no visible traits. Unfortunately these people are everywhere, especially where they shouldnt be.
I also HATE when they're like "That's not how that works..." Uhhhh... yes tf it is... what? Do you have the condition? No? Did you study it? No? How do you know how it works then?
I have dyscalculia (which is a math learning disability) I went to the guidance counselor who referred me to a tutor who looked me dead in the eye and said “yeah that doesn’t exist, it’s what they tell the dumb kids to make themselves feel better”. I’ll never forget it. Edit: I forgot to add, THIS WAS IN COLLEGE
Omg I have this too the struggle of people not even thinking it was a real condition was the worst! Elementary math was kicking my ass when I was like 9 lol, still does mess me up now
I'm so sorry you went through that. My brother who has dyscalculia had to give up on his passion for computer science because he wasn't able to complete the math credits for his degree. It made me really sad for him.
Yup I have dyslexia and dysgraphia and the head teacher of the class didn't beilive it existed I didn't remember it my self but it makes sanse I was in 1-4th grade.(my dad told me for the record)(reading and spelling/writeing dissability).
I didn't know I had this until a collage math teacher watched me do my work. And them doing more research and figuring out techniques. I cried when I got my very first A on a test
Former teacher here. In my experience, most teachers have not even started to unpack their ableist belief systems. They also tend to look down on kids they see as “other” - poor, gay, fat, mental illness, etc. I always had a hard time fitting in with those teachers and didn’t join in when they were talking crap about those kids, and it’s one of many reasons I left.
I'm glad you pointed this out. I had many teachers who would openly torment those kids in front of the class and encourage others to join in. It disgusted me and affected me too. I still feel ill just driving past my old middle and high schools.
@@error-try-again-later exactly!! So many teachers are red flags bc of this. Why would some one actually want go back to the hellscape that is school? It’s fishy and most of the time I’ve been right. Teachers are so naive and full of themselves
Absolutely! My aunt taught school for 30 years and bailed when she realized she was the only teacher who actually gaf. The admins hardly ever had her back though bc she wasn't a kiss a$$.
Rebecca Rogers has said that the reason she left that podcast was because the teachers were bullies so this is absolutely not shocking nor surprising to me
I remember seeing this. I could totally understand and see that. I noticed that a lot of the time they were pretty passive agressive to her and others. Shitty people.
@@allie7380yes! Both of u are so right! I thought she was fun, until I saw her talk on the podcast. All of these "teachers" are miserable because they don't take responsibility for their poor classroom management.
Rebecca Rogers has some horrible shorts out there. For example one in which she "acts out" a situation where a child is picked up by a parent who's apparently about to physically punish the child. A situation which she "acts out" with a satisfied grin on her face.
Definitely unprofessional to call a student dumb in any context, however, speaking about private matters in parent-teacher conference *is* professional, as the teacher's contract is with the guardians of the child
the idea of teachers mocking students IN FRONT OF THEM makes my blood boil. As a kid growing up with autism, i was often mocked in front of my face because people thought i was too stupid to realize. i cannot stand it.
I'm not diagnosed with autism bc my family doesn't have the money to get one but my family, friends, teachers and myself are sure I have it (btw I'm NOT self diagnosing I'm just saying I probably have it) and yeah even some of my family, teachers and friends have literally called me "dumb" or "special" in front of my face just bc I didn't get a joke or smth and I'm seriously getting really fucking tired of it and it feels like only some of my friends know how smart I actually am and not just with my grades either. Even though I know I'm smart I always feel like I'm dumb bc that's what people always think of me and I feel surprised or feel like their lying when someone actually calls me smart or talented.
Them trying to get students in trouble hurts me a lot. I lived in constant fear because of my homelife and if I did bad at school, it meant I was in trouble at home. I would never maliciously want a child to get in trouble and it really hurt how these teachers just laughed at it because child abuse is unfortunately very common.
I had a similar home situation. Literally the only reason I did so well in school was fear. I'm not dumb, but I have ADHD that was undiagnosed for years and i absolutely fell apart in college when the fear was gone.
Minus abuse, it's weird to shame a kid in public. Do the whole "I didn't know that," at home. It comes off as defensive and is an attempt to take any blame off their own backs.
That is why I stayed quite when a student was skipping his/her other class to chill in the class I was substituting in. You never know what was happening or going on in that students' life or what happened in the other class that would make the kid not want to be over there, but where I was. I follow Bronfernbrenner philosophy of how ecology (the environment) impacts on learning. If the kid doesn't feel safe he/she will not learn. Some classes are toxic AF.
Calling kids dumb even if they aren’t disabled of any kind is never ok. I was “dumb” in second grade because of trauma happing at home and got held back. I’ve had countless teachers tell me to “just let them know” when I needed help but to just go completely ignored when asked. I guess what I’m trying to say is that many teachers treat all their kids as if we’re all lazy while refusing to listen to us when we tell them why we might be struggling.
My friend I grew up with was labeled "the dumb one" because he had some learning disabilities that were obvious when you had one-on-one time with him, but his mom (only parent) was so checked out from parenting she denied getting him diagnosed with anything, and he was so discouraged that by the time we got to high school, he didn't think trying was worth it. We graduated together and my mom and I cried because we were so proud of him for pulling through. I wish he didn't have to go through that.
It’s never ok to call a kid dumb ever but especially as a teacher. It’s never ok to not follow a kids IEP or 504 plan it’s actually against the law. Sadly a lot of teachers and school do not follow them, but it’s also a safety problem because a lot of kids who are on IEP plans or 504s have medical issues. I personally had an IEP and 504 due to medical problems and learning disability’s. My family was fortunate enough to move and go to a school better equipped to handle my needs, because my mom was told that the school was not able to. Short story they kicked me out and got fined and trained.
I've had elementary school teachers get mad at me for just "sitting there" when I didn't understand the work or how to do a problem, but then get frustrated with me and turn real condescending real fast if I "took too long to get it" or "I already explained this 'x' times, how does this not make sense to you?" experiences teaching me to not bother asking for help because even if I receive it, it may not help me understand better anyway, but now I'm also being made to feel like total crap about myself.
I was homeschooled up until college, but I got services from the public schools and would get evaluations every few years. Many people would know I was autistic before even meeting me, and would talk to me like I’m a baby. I didn’t realize this was happening and I just thought they had some kind of accent or something. I’m just starting to realize how many teachers had these “accents.”
I had a teacher get upset when he got told by administrators that I had an iep and he would actively treat me like I was stupid and then make comments about how adhd isn’t an excuse to not be able to do something….
I feel many teachers think kids just don’t want to do things. Like for example, adhd paralysis and other things can be contributed to why your students don’t do things. It’s not always they just don’t want to do it. Maybe it’s overwhelming, maybe they are always battling with their brain. I hated how I felt like a lazy student in high school when really I wasn’t given the patience and understanding.
@@giordanodsouza9563 the original comment never said the teacher was calling them names. Just that they treated them like they were stupid which is pretty vague maybe they tried to over simplify the material. The comment adhd is not an excuse for not be able to do something is very true, students do not to be coddled.
My favorite line from back in school was “he doesn’t need an IEP, he just needs to apply himself”. I was never bullied by students. It was exclusively teachers.
This. Even with my IEP. “____ is a good student, does the work, raises hand, but I’d like to see more participation. _____ Needs to apply themself more” 😃 I ain’t raising my hand if I don’t know the answer, plain and simple
@@LaurelsJourney I’m simultaneously happy & sad that I’m not the only one. Happy that there’s people to commiserate with, & sad cos nobody deserves that treatment.
I got the “she’s very intelligent but she just needs to apply herself” ALLLL the time in school growing up. That was the exact problem, though, I couldn’t apply myself. I was dealing with undiagnosed PTSD and severe ADHD and as a result, I was smart and prospered in some regards but couldn’t remember to do my homework, bring it home, finish projects, etc. to save my life.
That reminds of a terrible teacher I had when I was 8 or 9 Once when I was very young I was playing by myself mimicking my favourite video game character at the time (I am autistic) and my teacher saw it, later in the day she imitated me in a comic way for the whole classroom and said that was me, that really hurt and I didn't do anything wrong to deserve that, I now remember that she did that after I on the previous day had corrected her on a class she got wrong because she didn't properly read the book, people like this feel like their egos are being insulted by 8 year olds I still remember that c*** and how every one laughed at me, I hope she was fired
The difference in Tell and Devin's responses is massive. "I hurt a community I'm part of and that is not okay" vs. "my kids are a part of the community I hurt so I wouldn't do that and therefore I didn't"
lol he still acts like it was someone else who did the bad thing he had to be "made aware of a clip" and it was still just "edited" to LOOK bad & wasnt even actually just bad lmao be so fr
He didn't though. He was a being an asshole to any kid who felt like a dumbass to him, he was not still on the topic of disabled kinds. It is obvious to anybody who has seen 2 or more of their podcasts. He was on the topic of the meeting with the teacher.
I’m someone who has a disease that makes my bones super brittle and I had a 504 plan in middle and high school as a result. I had one teacher refuse to come to the meeting to explain the 504 and why it was needed, who ridiculed me for having a broken spine that required me to lay down, and told me I was a failure as a student because I couldn’t “just work through it” with six fractured vertebrae. It’s almost like he resented the idea that I needed accommodations at all because it made HIS life harder. Like okay? It makes your life harder for an hour a day, it will affect me until I die. Somehow I think you’ll survive.
But how did it make his life so much harder?? I’m genuinely curious, how does you laying down have any effect on him? That is horrid of him to treat you like that! 😣😤
@QuartzieK I don't know how it works in the US, but in my country, every IEP costs the teacher a few weekly hours of unpaid work. One of my classes has 17 students with IEP, I have to prepare 18 assignments/tests/homework, but I'm only paid to prepare 1. I work around 20 hours per week completely unpaid
@@QuartzieKof course this is in no way the student's fault, and NO DECENT TEACHER would blame the kids/teens for having disabilities. But teachers are humans too, and usually VERY overworked humans, there is a limit to what we can possibly do without any support. Unfortunately we cannot give all attention needed to a student with disabilities and teach the rest of the class at the same time
I dropped out and the next week the Special Ed teacher reached out to my dad abt how they could better support me after 2 school years of fighting to even understand what was going on bc I “had good grades”. Like I nearly died to get those grades.
Whenever I say I have PTSD from school mistreatment people immediately tell me how misunderstood and underpaid teachers are. I feel bad for the teachers that aren't horrible but for the ones that literally gave me a trauma disorder by how much I was abused I couldn't care less. Infact, I dont want those teachers around any children at all if their willing to hit, humiliate, or assault disabled children, all of which I am a victim of.
As a future teacher I cannot agree with you more. So many of my peers are insanely biased or straight up ableist and it's sickening. I really worry for the students they teach someday.
Ive had both amazing and horrible teachers. I eill never forget Ms.Zeigler, my first grade teacher, who knew i was different but encouraged my differences reminded me how funny and kind and smart i was and not to listen to the people who were mean to me, and that my stuffed animals were cute and she would ask me how my favorite one i brought for ahow-and-tell was. She remembered Lizzy the whole year. And my art teacher thriugh elementary school Ms.Levi who encouraged me all the time and bragged about my abilities to my parents every day. She sees me at work and gets excited every time she sees me, she saw me as one of her own children. I will also never forget Mr.Holloway who said my anxiety and depression were fake and ignored my 504 plan and made fun of me. He also took points off my projects bc i couldnt afford the recipe he gave me and i had to find a new one online as it was an assignment over the weekend. It was a very extravagant recipe with duck and rabbit and all kinds of things that i couldn't get. My mom was working three jobs just to make ends meet. He would go out of his way to get me in trouble and write me up for things that werent true. I would go to the counselor's office, he would say i didnt go and he went to ask too but she said i wasnt there. I told him i was, she was with a student so i said i just need to calm down on the couch in the waiting area and will go back to class and she said okay. I asked her about it later and she said "...i havent even seen him today except passing him in the hallway this morning... he jasnt even said good morning to me, let alone ask me about you. I'll speak with him." She got it removed from my record and set up a meeting to make him follow the 504 plan which he also tried to find loopholes in so he didn't have to follow it. Ms.defillips was another who picked on my anxiety and refused to follow my 504 plan. There were many others. I just got rid of my 504 plan bc nobody was following it anyways and i didnt want to keep stressing my family out with meeting after meeting about it.
It's a similar situation when you're describing mistreatment at the hands of the NHS in the UK. If you try to point out that you were abused or neglected, a lot of people will immediately cite how underfunded the system is. This is 100% true and a huge part of the reason for terrible medical care in the UK. But we're all aware that we HAVE to praise and praise and praise and seemingly consequently ignore maltreatment because the Tories have purposefully been underfundung the system for decades to try and force international privatisation (I say international because the UK is made up of multiple nations with different governments, England having final say on most things) and there's this threat that if you don't APPRECIATE the crumbs you're getting enough, they'll be taken away altogether. Extremely abusive. What's worse is that it covers up stuff like this that isn't to do with funding, it's to do with miseducation and bigotry. My local authority insists I couldn't have ADHD because I self reported fairly good grades in high school. There are so many things wrong with that sentence. Even more stupidly, I DID have to go private to get that diagnosis, from a mental health practitioner who ALSO works for the NHS doing exactly the same job. So when she's got their name tag on, her diagnoses are acceptable. When she's being paid directly by a patient, her diagnoses are worthless. Illogical garbage, especially when you consider the end game is to make ALL medical practitioners private which, by this metric, would make them all untrustworthy and unqualified.
Sorry to hear that, I hope that you get better and overcome this. As for teachers, being disabled myself I have an undying refusal to trust them right away. And this is because they work with kids. They have to show they are qualified to be around children, especially fat, disabled, queer, mentally ill kids. There are just so many teachers out there who don't deserve to be teachers at all.
The biggest problem that I think a lot of people struggle with is the fact that schools only recognize the fact that they’re getting good grades despite the disability. They don’t recognize all the extra work and resources needed for this to be achieved, or the toll it takes on students.
ah, yes. sophomore year: "oh, you're too smart to have ADHD! you have such good grades!" -my guidance counselor junior year: "oh, I see you're struggling, let me help you find yourself a therapist!" (5 months pass) "You STILL haven't followed up on that? well, hmm. OK, here's this therapist I've worked with before, good luck!" -her again senior year: "you're dissociating???? You want it to END???? have you ever wanted to hurt yourself or others???? Oh noo you poor thing you might have depression, try some meds... oh, you think you have ADHD, well, ok, here's an evaluation" -her, again jan-april of senior year: still dissociating, limped my way through my required classes, nearly failed because of an insanely planned english class whose curriculum was the same as two normal classes. required class. CP section, literally the lowest difficulty level. no help for me. the LAST DAY of senior year, 2 weeks after the rest of the seniors already left: "here's the results of your eval! yeah, you have ADHD out the ass, wow. hope that'll be useful for your college accommodations!" -my counselor. again.
As someone who was a substitute teacher for 6 years, I heard so many teachers talking shit about their students and their grades in the teachers lounge during lunch, it was so gross
I had one of the special ed teachers as my study hall teacher one year in high school and the stuff they said about their students was what made me decide to wait until I graduated before being evaluated for autism.
My teachers are straight up mean. I'd sit in class and all of the sudden a teacher would stop her rambling or teaching to throw an insult at me, how stupid and dumb i was, how i was "supposedly" not paying attention even if i was looking right at her, how she knew some kids won't pass the next test and she'd look at me yada yada. I had never really been hated by teachers, i'm not a good student i barely pass all my classes but im quiet and i do my work rather dilligently. I just have clinical deppression and some days i would sit in class not paying attention because i didn't feel like it would matter if i did or didn't, and it wouldn't help when these teachers would throw insults at me. This one specific teacher, my math teacher last year, i couldn't even ask her for help because she immedietly starts yelling about how "i don't pay attention" during class but then she preaches going up to her and asking for help, and when i of course avoid going up to her desk to ask for help she jabs at me for not going to her. But truly, i do believe there are some students that dont give a shit about school and don't try, but there are others that are struggling one way or another and these teacher have to realise that it really doesn't hurt to be nicer to your students.
Ugh it really is I was a tutor and was allowed to sit in the teachers lounge since there was nowhere else for me to go when the kids went to lunch and it was awful a lot of teachers are so judgmental and not even afraid of shitting on these kids
My sister already had an IEP for hearing loss, but when we found out she was dyslexic and autistic we went to the school for additional support. The school was like “well she has good grades, so she doesn’t need the help” not realizing she was struggling a lot just to maintain those grades. This just boils my blood.
as someone with ADHD and an autoimmune disease who has struggled with depression in the past, it’s such a HUGE issue. If you’re killing yourself to maintain those grades, you don’t need more support. If you can’t keep up straight As any longer, you’re just being lazy, you’re a burden on the education system, and you don’t *deserve* any support. Also, I understand being a teacher is hugely difficult, but if I’m having a breakdown over an assignment I need empathy (and water) not people telling me what a horrible little brat I am for having disabilities.
This! I have major test anxiety and was having a panic attack every time I took a test. I had diagnosed anxiety from a psychiatrist who even recommended accommodations. My school said, "you want a 504? No, you have straight As, you don't need one."
I fucking hate the idea that there are kids running themselves into the ground to mask just to try and fit in. Teachers are there to facilitate growth, happiness, and learning not judge, torment, and mock disabilities to score lame jokes . I hope they get tossed.
I didn't know IEPs for hearing loss were a thing. Though I suppose this may be because I have had hearing aids since I was 5 and I also have a mother than believes as long as my grades are fine I'm "completely normal"
i finally got my autism and adhd diagnosis in my 30s. but in high school it was me and two other seniors who had been held back for algebra II. the teacher would give them extra time on their test and would give them "half credit" for "attempting" the work. meanwhile i would turn in my assignments with pages of scratch work get and get 0s. i finally asked her about why i wasn't being treated the same and she said "well because they need the extra help. you just aren't applying yourself."
"oftentimes a teacher is a child's first bully" hit me like a ton of bricks. growing up none of my peers recieved all of the mistreatment i got from my teachers, and my teachers teased me so much more than anyone else ever did all because im neurodivergent. it makes so much more sense to me now than it did when i was little
My bf went through the same thing. His first bully was his 1st grade teacher which incited other kids beginning to bully him. We believe he has some sort of neurodivergency along with dyslexia, and on top of that, he’s trans. It was gross and disgusting and it killed me that he had to stay in that school system for the rest of school. We just recently graduated, so he’s finally out of that hell.
If your teachers punished you for acting out in class, then you probably deserved it. You should've accepted you punishment and changed for the better. But, judging by this comment , you never changed. But don't worry, it's no too late to change.
@kennethcook8598 i never acted out unless i was having an autistic meltdown due to not having accommodations bc i was undiagnosed. i would, however, be humiliated in front of the entire class daily by my 5th and 6th grade teachers for spacing out in class or saying something slightly strange. instead of being talked to, i was only punished and ridiculed. none of my teachers ever tried to actually understand me.
@kennethcook8598 and i have changed a lot. im 17 now going into my senior year and i havent screamed at school since elementary school. the constant insults i would get from teachers didnt stop until 8th grade. im still always on edge around new teachers until i get to know them. the hurt that those teachers inflicted on me is still there
As a mom whose child "barely" qualified for an IEP after fighting so hard for her is disgusting.... She might "look" normal but she struggles. Her school doesn't honor her sensory breaks because she appears "regulated" and is too anxious to ask for one. This type of rhetoric is exactly why she struggles as much as she does...
I second that, I am In the same boat. My daughters 10 she FINALLY just got an IEP even though I’ve been fighting for her to be evaluated for years. The tears, anxiety, and energy I’ve invested in her getting her basic needs of education met is truly unimaginable. We should have a support group!
im so sorry your child's school didn't give her the accommodations she deserved, just shows how ableist and unaccepting these school districts are. I deeply empathize with your daughter as I myself am I late diagnosed autistic teen was unaccommodated throughout school so I can understand how much she is struggling despite looking "normal". I love how your willing to fight for your child's IEP (which shouldn't be the case, the IEP should be given to your kid), but nevertheless, you're an amazing parent. I hope your child will be accommodated fairly in the future!
I remember when I confided in the principal of my elementary school in a moment of panic that if they were to call my parents for any reason I would be spanked multiple times, locked in my room and forced to sit in the middle of the floor alone and unmoving for hours, and would not be given dinner. This was entirely true and based on previous events. And then he called my parents anyways and lied to them about what I said. He told my parents that I told him that they were locking me in a dark closet and denying me food, or something insane along those lines. So guess who got punished even worse for ‘lying’. I hate teachers.
that's awful of the principal, he should not have told the _abusers_ of an abused kid like that. but I do need you to realise, you were absolutely denied food? maybe not locked in a closet but you were locked in a dark room. like that's some insanely abusive shit. I hope those people are out of your life now and you are healing
I’m autistic and have a 504 and this hurts to hear. Just cause they’re “barely qualified“ doesn’t mean they don’t need help. I’ve been told I “barely qualify“ and it hurts. Edit: I also have adhd and forgot to mention it at the time due to my autism mostly taking priority in most of my school 504 stuff
Especially because most of us, if not all, have been tryingso damn hard to be "normal" and "deal with it" like everyone tells us to. And then you manage to carry your burden with loads of pain and sacrifice and they say; There you go, see, you don't need any help, this will be good for you, huh, toughen you up a bit."
@@Widdekuu91 Right?? Like they want us to mask and it's the only way to survive so we do, only for them to act like masking means we're obviously faking it, or that clearly all we needed to do was "try harder", like we're not absolutely exhausted all the time. Like do you want us to mask or not? I'm autistic either way?
I always forced myself to get good grades but at the end of last year i had a mental break because it was so so hard to get work done and be at school with autism and adhd. i made it so far but it ended in disaster. i just wish i could’ve had accommodations the whole time because even if it didn’t “look” like i needed them, i wouldnt have been off from a school a whole month cause i lost my damn mind.
That's horrible. My child was evaluated for a 504 and I was told it was meant to "level the playing field" so all students can succeed. "Barely qualifying" is completely irrelevant. Their needs are simply supposed to be met...like what should be the fucking goal for ALL students.
a week after my dad died, my teacher made the class watch a movie where the dad was killed on screen and didnt let me leave and got mad when i closed my eyes and eventually started crying. i was nine. in my life, teachers had always been the ones picking on me. the kids too but often it would be AFTER the teachers started, like they got inspired by them. i know its unfair to feel this way, but i always struggle with the resentment thats built up towards teachers.
just because not all teachers would behave that way doesn’t make your situation any less valid - i’m so sorry that happened to you, what an awful situation.
When I was 9 my teacher would pick on me in front of the entire class and then encourage the other kids to pick on me as well. People like that are evil. I'm really sorry that you had to experience that 😔
As someone who has lost both of their parents at a young age, and has dealt with teachers bullying/picking on me i feel for you. My mom died when I was about 6, and my dad when i was i believe 9 or 10. The first teacher who sort of picked on me was in 2nd grade. This teacher would assign us work, and I didn’t know how to do it. I believe I was absent the day they explained to us how to do it (this was math class) and I would ask the teacher for help and every. single. time. she would tell me something along the lines of “cmon try harder”. She did nothing to help me and i even cried a few times in her classroom. Another situation that happened was in 7th grade and my teacher assigned us A CRAP TON of work to do all year, which we didn’t learn anything from. She would literally give us a book to read with about 100 or more pages then have us write an essay and assign us work on top of that and she made it due by A WEEK and she would assign work to us WHILE we were doing that. It was stressful, and this teacher had something against me, because she would only be very cruel to me and the autistic girl in my class. I hope that if you are going into school next year, you have an amazing teacher who will help you and maximize your success and potential :).
My elementary school teacher made fun of my speech impediments. Which were caused due to Trauma (didnt speak until 4 y/o, had trouble talking and socializing cuz I didnt get to talk to other kids until I was 5, still have speech impediments) but those same teachers that didnt care about the abuse going on and instead worsened it are now either dead or close to it lol I won 😊😊😊😊
I remember getting in trouble at school (a missunderstanding but adults dont listen to kids) and the principal "punished" me by having me sit in and help a Special Ed class. I absolutely loved it, i was able to bring those kids some joy. They really deserve better.
I was a special ed para for a while, and I honestly left because I just couldn't tolerate the way admin treated the kids. The other two paras in our class of six kids was draining themselves dry every day to try and make sure our kids got an education and didn't hate school. But higher ups didn't have any interest in even the bare minimum. Nobody wanted to let our kids participate in gen ed classes like art and music (even with 1:1 support), we had to fight to get them included in class events and trips, we could never get even basic resources for them to learn anything, the list goes on. I was spending my own time finding and making resources for my student just so they could learn something because they were using the same "match same" velcro work that they had had for the last FIVE YEARS. The same exact assignment every single day for five years. No wonder the kid wasn't learning anything and hated school!! In a matter of months they learned things others had been trying to teach them for years, because so often those kids are basically stuck in a room and teachers are told to hide them away. It's disgusting, and as happy as I am that our kids were able to have a fun year, I couldn't stay with it and keep buring myself out like that. It just wasn't healthy or sustainable, especially with the abysmal pay.
@@rosykindbunny1313like no it isn’t. These people are humans, like us. The only difference between us is that their brain may have less dopamine, may have a missing leg, may be in pain a lot, may not be able to understand social cues but they are still people, people who deserve friends and support.
i have a medical document outlining exactly what and what i don’t need for my special needs. i gave this to my school. i was swiftly denied twice with the excuse “we know you can do it without help!!”. then they get surprised when i nearly fail. this is my future.
At a IEP meeting when I was a child, they were saying how well I’m doing and spoke of taking these tools away from me because I was doing so well and my father was not having it. I’m so thankful for my father who fought for me to keep these accommodations for me so that I could do well in classes
You’re literally doing well BECAUSE of those accommodations! It’s basically like telling someone with poor eyesight they shouldn’t wear glasses anymore because they’re seeing with their glasses
IEPs are plans to make sure students receive educational supports because they have a learning disability (could be any kind of disability). Each year there is a meeting that allows for parents teachers and admin to discuss the students educational plan. Sometimes students no longer need an IEP, sometimes they do.
@@asmrtpop2676IEPs are not the same. They can change and there are meetings held each school year to evaluate their effectiveness. It can be determined that a student no longer needs certain accommodations or maybe needs to be supported in other ways.
“I’d normally be worried about the kid knowing what I’m saying- but he can’t spell,” made my jaw drop. That’s such a horrible thing to say about anyone, especially a kid. As someone who slipped through the cracks and had to make their own accommodations because I was never told about accessibility features, I would never have felt safe if I had teachers like these. It’s one thing to be ridiculed and judged by kids your age, it’s another to be judged by the adults meant to educate and look after you. Shame on them
Literally. I've always hated when childcare aids and teachers talk about kids behind their backs, but right in front of the child too!? Wtfff!!!That made me even more sick. 🤢 Like damn...
seriously!! for a grown man to openly call a young child who’s still developing and learning ‘dumb’ is just so awful to me. regardless of whether that child is disabled or not, children shouldn’t be labeled as ‘smart’ or ‘dumb’ by adults who likely understand nothing about how their brains work- every child, and every person, is different in their own way, and might struggle or succeed in different areas. that doesn’t define their levels of intelligence, and boiling it down to that just feels invalidating and superficial to me. it’s so immature and disgusting for a grown man to take pleasure in mocking children based on an arbitrary assumption.
I had teachers like these. I found out one day that they were all making fun of me behind my back like that. they didn't even call me by my name, just a nickname they made up to make fun of me. it astounds me how someone can decide to work with children when they can't treat said children with basic respect. for context, I'm neurodivergent with mental illnesses & chronic fatigue & pain (also queer but wasn't out yet). I didn't get diagnosed until I was 19 though, & all my teachers just claimed I was being Like That on purpose to spite them. they really thought I wasn't sleeping or eating & was failing my classes just to spite them. they really believe they're the center of the entire universe. it doesn't occur to them that kids are having trouble because their teachers are terrible human beings, not the other way around. edit, because i completely forgot one of the staff at that school literally tested me for neurodivergencies or mental illness via giving me a math sheet to do & then "officially" diagnosing me as stupid & spiteful. not paraphrasing.
@@SydneyStewart-d3f that's one thing that bugged me about her video about autism. "How do you best get to know your students? Through their guardians" like maybe if you had one conversation with your student you could help them better.
As someone who had a 504 due to my anxiety and OCD I will forever be grateful to my 8th grade math teacher. Growing up I had extreme test anxiety and often found myself not being able to function before a test. We would take standardized test that I knew did not matter and I will still have panic attacks over them and often found my sled vomiting before test. My 8th grade math tecaher happened to have a daughter with similar sticklers and was extremely supportive. She was able to tell if I was struggling from test anxiety when no other teacher could. When she saw this she would always come up to me and try to help. Letting me now it was okay to walk outside and take a breath or resume the test on another day. But the best thing she ever did for me was force me to step away from a test when I wouldn’t. The moment I stepped away I realized just how stressed I was. After that she gave me some gum and let me resume in a private room. I had never tried chewing gum to help with stress and it changed my life. Ever since that day I have always carried gum on me and it is one of my best coping strategies. This one teacher helped me preserver through countless teachers who did not care about my 504 or about me and I wish that everyone could have experienced that.
A lot of my early teachers did a ton of damage I got the “youre so smart but you need to stop being lazy” talk a lot. But a few of my teachers in highschool are a big part of the reason I am able to communicate as openly as I do now I know I had a math teacher who would A let me sleep while he tutored kids after school (it was an open invite type extra help thing) because I was not getting enough sleep at home but he was also the first person to tell me the way I acted during school was a little unsettling (which in retrospect may not be the best thing to say to a student but the context was he said it seemed like I was putting on a show which I was and that he thinks I seem like a really good person when Im not putting on a performance) and then I had a public speaking teacher who helped me with my speaking rhythm and and helped me communicate more clearly. That class was also just super fun for me since it gave me a free outlet to info dump for 10 minutes about random topics. I gave a ten minute speech on why I don’t like the most common characteristics attached to Virgo (the star sign) and how I think it could be framed better
I agree that it was a great apology, snd apologies like his should be the standard. Its sad that so many youtubers and influencers fall below the bare minimum...
I wasnt diagnosed with ADHD until I was an adult, but as someone with physically abusive parents (and had to watch my older brother get beaten literally bloody once in elementary school because his teacher dismissed his pleas to NOT tell our father about a late homework assignment during a parent teacher conference), watching those teachers relish and laugh at kids getting in trouble on the car ride home made me boil up.
i cant believe they are so ignorant of what parents can do to their kids when they’re mad. so much trauma is inflicted on these innocent children over late homework or grades :(
Worse part is: TEACHERS ARE REQUIRED REPORTERS. If they have EVEN AN INKLING a child is being abused in ANY capacity they are to report it to the proper authorities. They're putting children's lives at risk. Disgusting.
@@theblackcat7205 I agree. I had a feeding tube and was in and out of hospital barely clinging to life at 15, when I was finally allowed to go to school my mother was assured all teachers were fully aware of the reasons for my absence and that I was not well. Que my physics teacher, who, as soon as I appeared in the class already nervous because of my feeding tube and what horrible remarks I'll get from my bullies she turned and said to me: "Where have you been?" Me: **explains** Her: oh, I thought you were just hiding in the toilets. The class laughed and that opened up a shit ton of nasty remarks. I even had a boy come up to me and tell me "I can't wait for you to unalive". The school promised my mother they would provide a private room for me to use my feeding tube at lunch, nah. They basically stuck me in the room where children were sent to isolation (a room where children are sent to be alone for the rest of the day for misbehaving) and I was constantly made fun of and told how weird and gross I was for syringing the mixture into my tube. The teacher that was there pretended not to hear it and that he was doing very important paperwork. Luckily, when I cried to my very nice librarian, she said I could hide behind her desk and "feed" myself there out of the eyes of anyone. And that's what I did. They didn't even notice I was no longer using that room, they didn't care.
As someone who’s worked in special education, I can say these ideas are common amongst teachers. I think Universities need to require more classes on “disabilities”
Yeah, so far I’ve only taken one. The SPED is nice but you take it once and then never spend more time on it. And it baffles me cause we have to take these classes but there is still so much misinformation that it's insane.
Depends who's teaching the university classes too. I'm planning to be a teacher, so is my friend. She's already taken the child development class and she would tell me about how they spoke of disabled students. Stuff like "you just have to put up with them." It seems most of the education was about how to ignore them and teach the "normal" kids. I'm having to take the class next semester and I'm going to have to sit through that and also worry about having to educate myself on these subjects later. If I'm going to be in a classroom, my students can't afford me being ignorant.
it really is sickening how common it is. my mom works in special education, she’s been a special needs teacher for over two decades now. she’s taught literally every grade possible, and my dad teaches high school. i heard so many students talk about how good my dad was with their plans and respecting his kids in class. i have autism, add+adhd, and have always been a “gifted kid.” my sister, 16, is the exact same without the autism. both of us had back surgery when we were 15 and 14 respectively. my sister has POTS. i walk with a cane. both of us openly spoke about advocating for how disabled and special needs students were and are treated by the system. i worked with FMD kids all 4 years of high school. i’m so thankful i had so many teachers tell me i left an impact on them but particularly in that sense. i really hope they’ll all treat future kids just as kindly and openly as they did with me and have with my sister.
As someone with an IEP for my speech, if i ever heard a teacher said "She barely qualified, i can understand her perfectly" i would say "Oh I'm sorry I didn't know you where picked on for years, and have people ALL the time say 'I sorry what? I couldn't understand you," no one barely qualifys, you either qualify or you don't
People always say "i'm not ableist!" and they'd *never* make fun of an autistic person and/or disabled people! But they do make fun of the "weird" ones (read: disabled). The ones who cant stop moving, the ones who shout things out randomly, the ones who cant type, cant speak, cant think in words sometimes or always. Thank you for always including an educational segment on whatever you're covering! As someone with an IEP and a victim of bullying for my disablities, this really hit home. (Apologies for any typos, my keyboard is lagging so hard right now)
I have autism but my school doesn't know. I have a fixation on schedules however my home life breaks the schedule and it doesn't help me get things done. I also have fixations on things like literature and psychology but have no time to study for it. I love literature so much that I'm learning a foreign language to read literature from a country that I read translations of the literature but translations don't capture the entire story and all the details of the piece of literature that I am reading.
They say that they’d never be horrible to a neurodivergent person but then they tell us to stop talking about special interests, that “It isn’t that bad” when we have sensory overload. Or worse, we trust our friends and say “Hey I’m (insert disability)” and then they tell everybody. It’s disgusting.
im in college but there’s a guy with Tourettes that i hear shouting whenever im in class. it never crossed my mind to make fun of him but i know others probably do
I know this is a bit of a stretch, but there was this point in my life where I literally couldn’t remember how to spell. I tried to write grandma on a piece of paper, but only got to gra until I forgot. It was particularly scary because my dad- whom I’m very close with- got a little impatient when I started sentences but couldn’t finish. I knew I was thinking properly, I just couldn’t say it. But it was probably because we had traveled and gone a pretty high elevation in Colorado. Luckily, it stopped that night. Bless all the souls who have to deal with this daily. Just saying to an intimidating teacher, “so . . .” And then forgetting what you were saying is very stressful.
It's stupid with the typing thing especially like typing is hard the entire qwerty system is outdated because it was made for typewriters not computers. And being non verbal is not stupid or weird, babies aren't verbal until they're a toddler, and the only people who are stupid are teachers that don't give more learning opportunities for people who are dyslexic or mute, my cousins autism wasn't addressed until she was a teen and it really angers me because that information could have really helped her. Sorry for ranting I just easily get upset when people call these things weird when there are solutions but people are too lazy to give them those options.
TOD all went downhill after Rogers left. She was probably the glue holding it all together and once she was pretty much bullied out of it, there was no hope
@@frog3262 she may have before, I don't really remember if she actually said anything ableist, but if she did, nowadays she's changed and has defended disabled kids many times
As a teacher, this makes me really sad. My disabled and neurodivergent students are the students who I rely on to see if I’m doing a good job as a teacher or not. 9 times out of 10, accommodations for neurodivergent students are actually just good teaching. Like, I had a student come to me with a plan (we don’t call them IEPs in the UK) and when I looked through it, most of the things were just things that would aid every student in the class, plus extra rest breaks to help her focus. There’s nothing that brings me more joy than watching a disabled or neurodivergent student who’s had a really bad experience of school realise that they can do just as well as their peers. In fact, in my school, disabled and neurodivergent students statistically make more progress than their peers - probably because their potential was more untapped, so when they come to us, they realise how much they can do for the first time.
This so much. I’m both a teacher and neurodivergent, and everything I do to adapt to the needs of my students helps everyone. Sadly, I’ve met several teachers here in the UK who are more like the TOD podcasters than we’d like.
You two have helped so many with your work🫶🏾 As a person who had undiagnosed anxiety in my early teen years, I can see the amount of hard work good teachers put into helping their students! Thank y’all ❤️❤️
@@aldonakozowska2667 yeah definitely. School life is improved by the existence of disabled people. From the big things like having an elevator helping everyone to the things you might not even notice like teachers being taught how to properly enunciate when talking and face the class so everyone can hear. They’re things that make everyone’s lives easier
i “barely qualified” for an IEP and wasnt allowed to have extra time because my grades were “too high”. i ended up dropping out and moving to a montessori school just months later
I attended several special needs schools and I can confirm the American education system is DISGUSTINGLY ableist. We were seen as dangerous animals who couldn’t understand anything instead of people who learned differently, I was abused, emotionally harassed, and even physically abused. The trauma I have still wrecks me, and I’ve been out of public school for 5 years. Not only is there a terrifying abuse of power by the teachers, but the treatment and understanding of mental conditions is abhorrent. Five years on, it hasn’t gotten any better. My little cousin with ADHD is being enrolled in the bridges program, which aims to “recorrect” her thinking, not to teach her in different ways, no, to try and teach her in ways science already knows her brain chemistry can’t understand. I’m so scared she will suffer the same trauma I have. Thank you for covering this, and to any other neurodivergent kids or teens reading this, you aren’t alone, and I’m so sorry you have to suffer this abuse in what is supposed to be a first world country.
This is a great comment, and I second everything you say. As a disabled person in the UK, I'd like to add that this is global. This disgusting treatment of disabled people exists like a rotting fungus all over the world.
I just recently found out that I have autism from my parents. Apparently, two therapists different I had when I was younger theorized that I had autism, but they didn’t have me tested because the didn’t want me to “use it [my autism] as a crutch.” I’m pissed off that I was denied proper therapy to cope with my social an emotional issues due to the stigmas that my parents fell victim to. Though I’m very glad, on the other hand, that I wasn’t treated like a whole different species, as many of my autistic friends were when we were in school. The education system in the US really is fucked.
Can confirm, all my worst bullies were teachers. Once one pulled me out of study hall under the guise of helping with math homework, then yelled at me for thirty minutes, saying such highlights as “all the seniors in my class want to beat you up because of how annoying you are to me.” “All your teachers complain about you to me.” “Kids come in from the hallways complaining about you.” And my favorite “it’s your own fault you were called a homophobic slur, because you were probably mean to the kid who called you it.” She Appearantly “has had dozens of queer students, some of which even went so far as transitioning, and none of them ever faced any bullying at this school for their own identity, because this isn’t that type of school.” All because I didn’t see her behind me while entering the school that morning and thus didn’t hold the door for her.
@@morsfictus thank you, I am doing much better as this was years ago and I’ve since graduated. But the teacher was never fired. For a variety of reasons I was too scared to report what happened. So she never faced anything for it. But that’s just how things are sometimes.
I had a teacher that liked me, actually, but scolded the ENTIRE CLASS for half of a 45 minute class period because I didn't do my homework. Literally everyone else in the class did. It wasn't hard to figure out. I have AuDHD so... Doing homework that's assigned "for practice" is both hard to remember and also is hard for me to do because it's something my autism makes me think i don't need to do if I don't need the practice. I got As and Bs on all his tests and it was clear to other students I was his favorite in his class, and was the next year, but for some reason, if I missed something it was a bigger deal. I think he THOUGHT I was wasting potential or some shit but it still stung to be called out like that.
@@Frickll Honestly kind of unsurprising. There was this 6th-grade teacher way back in elementary school that was infamous for bullying students. I saw him throw a kid's binder out the window, make countless jokes at their expense, and really single out and shame students in the front of the class. I know my parents complained because I told them how awful he was. Years and years later I hear about how the girl in my neighborhood had him and how she would come home sobbing because of him. He terrified her, apparently, she was scared to even go to school at all. Her parents complained and knew other parents that complained. I am 26 now and he _still_ has his job.
From the perspective of a disabled person trying to advocate for her younger disabled brother: No kid who gets an IEP “barely qualif[ies.]” It is SO hard to get an IEP if you are not visibly disabled that it wouldn’t be worth it to lie, and by the time they do get one it’s too late; you’ve already set them even further back. I’ve had teachers refuse to participate in IEPs, schools that refuse to enforce them, and staff that actively hinder kids’ learning. The same teacher that denies to participate in an IEP or allow the child to access the ALREADY IN-CLASS accommodation aid, are the same who write home everyday: “irritating attitude,” “couldn’t follow exact verbal directions,” “asked for too much help, “looked bored,” “wouldn’t start the assignment without help,” etc. I know that they are struggling with cut-budgets, massive class sizes, and a lack of resources, but help me help you. Don’t deny resources to a CHILD just because you’re frustrated with the system, please.
that testing is so exhausting. mine took weeks because it was broken up into multiple parts of my school days as a small kid. it was gruelling, and a big chunk of it was basically just classwork done to assess my math and writing abilities. i seriously doubt any child being cunning enough, let alone having the energy or capability of lying about something that long, or even having the want to after they saw how many math questions they'd be asked to solve at once. it was like a job interview and entrance exam for a school all in one done to see how my brain works and doesn't... i really wish more teachers understood what a big deal that kind of stuff is to kids
Not trying to be rude but I am one of those barely qualified kids, I have autism and reaped those accomodations but didn't necessarily need them. I enjoyed the attention and was making straight As before.
I don’t think you’re being rude, but mainly as someone who was a “gifted kid” who than turned out to be neurodivergent- you likely continued to be happy and pass in school BECAUSE you had an IEP. What happened to me is I was “gifted” in school for my entire life and then I hit high school and flunked all of my classes and had to repeat a grade, witch as a kid who had staked a decent portion of my self worth on my grades was mortifying. This happens to a lot of other neurodivergent kids who are “doing fine” or “don’t need accommodation because look! They have straight As!” And then they don’t get the help they need and as they hit high school or college either the workload doubles or even triples or the amount of extra energy that is being put into masking and forcing yourself through the circle hole as a square peg finally runs out: everything crashes and burns in one big firey explosion of death. All I’m saying is: you qualified for an IEP (super not easy to do) you DESERVED that IEP and needed it. I’m saying this not to try and guilt you please don’t misunderstand: but to tell you that the IEP you got was absolutely necessary and if this is out of imposter syndrome pr something internalized: it’s ok. Often neurodivergent people who are also “gifted” are wrought with guilt by society for not being disabled ENOUGH. But there isn’t such a thing. You either are or aren’t, and there is a spectrum to it, but being on the lower end of the spectrum dosnt deny you the right to help and accommodations.
@@theunofficialaccount7707 I’m really glad you had accommodations available to you despite not needing them. I don’t deny your experience, and I’m thankful you shared. However, you didn’t barely qualify; you have autism and thus qualify for such accommodations regardless of your grades. About 50% of non-accommodated autistic children maintain approved grades (Anderson, 2020). Instead, a huge issue for autistic children is absenteeism, as this is often looked down upon and may even earn docked marks on your final grade-my accommodations for my own autism in university included an exemption from absent/late penalty. I also maintained high grades, and I rarely used my accommodations. However, it doesn’t negate the fact that it was much more stressful to maintain the grades prior to having access to accommodations. Accommodations for what is deemed as “barely qualify[ing]” disabled children are still there to provide ensured access to aid, and to relieve the student of stress and anxiety.
I was a Straight A student in middle an high school but had an IEP due to Chronic Fatigue and a writing disability caused by a brain tumor resection. Lauren's comment about "barely qualified for an IEP really cut deep." Despite my surgery I was not visibly disabled and to anyone who was not fully aware of my circumstances would think I am fully functional. I had so many teachers doubt that I needed an IEP because I was such a high preforming student, but only the really good teachers realized that I was a good preforming student because of my IEP. I was privileged enough to be in such a good school district and most of my teachers we amazing.
So many people still think "disabled" is wheelchair-bound (and completely immobile; most wheelchair users are partly ambulatory but are better off with mobility aids, it isn't a miracle when someone in a wheelchair briefly stands up like some think hahahaha), nonverbal, completely unable to communicate at all, etc. Very outdated ideas, I wish there were more education on this kinda thing but ableism is still sadly so commonplace and even accepted in a lot of cases, because we're seen as less than. I'm glad you had good teachers and hope you're doing okay now! (Especially if you're in the northern hemisphere; I know my own fatigue (narcolepsy lol) gets a lot worse in the heat!)
Yes! I have severe anxiety (4 different anxiety disordered) and a mobility disorder that isn’t visible. Just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. I pass out if standing for too long. I can’t be surrounded or I shut down. There’s so many different types of disabilities. And luckily my mother is a special Ed teacher so I got my iep and 504 plan pretty easily.
the concept of ignoring the possible REASON someone may seem fine in favor of assuming there must be nothing wrong is just... bonkers. "yea I have this nasty cut on my arm, it really sucks" "well I don't SEE a cut!" "its... under that bandage..."
My parents had to hire a lawyer to get me a 504 because my "grades were too good." Meanwhile I was living with a chronic pain disorder that kept getting worse, life was living hell. I've had teachers threaten me and laugh in my face. It sucks seeing teachers in 2023 still shaming kids. At least Tell seems sincere. Thanks for covering this. Appreciate you.
I was denied a 504 until I sent a message about my suicidal thoughts (due in part to bullying and ostracization I received about my autism) to my friends over a school network. The guidance counsellor immediately changed her rhetoric, which led to me associating threatening to hurt myself with being taken seriously for many years. Later that year, I dropped out of 7th grade for six weeks so I could go to intensive therapy (called Partial Hospitalization in my area) 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. When I met with the guidance counsellor upon returning to school, she encouraged my to lie to my friends about where I'd been, enforcing shame for getting mental health treatment, which I luckily had had enough therapy to say 'f that' to. Even years later, my teachers continue to question whether I actually need my accommodations just because I'm traditionally smart. And the main accommodation they refuse? They won't let me sit with my back to a wall because I have OCD-based intrusive thoughts about being literally stabbed in the back.
oh, they're just trying to expose you to those situations to prepare you for the real world, and maybe it might even help your OCD!! Who knows? (I'm being sarcastic btw)
I remember being told to not tell other kids when I went back to school that I was going to intensive therapy because ‘they’d be jealous’. Excuse me, WHAT?! Why would the other kids be jealous of me for having depression???
I’m currently studying to be a speech pathologist and I recently unpacked a similar issue from my childhood to my supervisor. I was in therapy for ADHD, PTSD, an eating disorder, and self-harm in middle school. I went to the nurses office everyday because I’d get so overwhelmed at school so my mom took me to a psychologist. Then when I went to the nurses’ office to update them, I told them out loud that I went to therapy. They called my mom to explain to me how inappropriate that was. I was explicitly told that getting mental health support was shameful at age 11. And I’m still dealing with that as an adult, especially as one that is working towards an official autism diagnosis.
They are legally required to comply. Have a parent call and complain or, if you're in college, visit the disability resource center and explain what's happening. Failing to comply with a disabled student's documented accommodation needs is illegal.
In 3rd grade I was diagnosed as autistic. My teacher refused to let me get an IEP. Even when my mom showed her the literal documents. She said I was “just shy” and that she had “seen boys who were autistic, and I wasn’t like them” just because I was AFAB.
Love when teachers decide they’re doctors too! 🙄 as a woman who didn’t get an adhd diagnosis til college (despite very “male” symptoms!!!) I feel you deeply
I have multiple kinds of asthma and had a coach tell me they "knew people with asthma and they didn't use it as an excuse" when I was hyperventilating during volleyball practice. What's with people thinking everyone experiences the same symptoms and behaves the same way? 😢
@@notjaylo I relate to this! I have asthma but only got it diagnosed a couple years ago. When I was starting middle school (I’m in high school now) I played volleyball. It was my teammates who were the problem. They were the stereotypical white girl bullies who thought they were the most beautiful and perfect beings on the planet. During practice I would constantly have to take breaks because I couldn’t breathe. One time one of the girls told me I was just out of shape and needed to exercise more.
I am a special education teacher who also has ADHD. I love being with these students because they are the most creative and intuitive students. We also understand each other and the hardships of having a disability. I can relate them. This is appalling hearing these story and what the podcast was saying. If they stopped with their neurotypical values, they could really see the strengths these kids have.
i have auadhd and where i work at a summer program we get a handful of kids on various spectrums, i relate to them on a level no one else there really can but also because i was in their position at one point, i treat them how i would've wanted to be at their age but also based off of what they have and how to handle them best while also acknowledging that they *do* have something up and letting them get out what they need to do sometimes in order for example to sit still
im going to be a special education teacher this year for the first time. im extremely excited and nervous because i want to connect with my students, support them, and teach them to the best of my abilities. but im nervous because i know students with disabilities have an extremely difficult time with the general school system.
My mom (a first grade teacher for nearly 20 years) and I felt the same. Sure she’ll share some “gossip” occasionally but she’s never ever made fun of any student.
@@starparodier91 I was a Helper for a teacher for some time and where I'm from in the early stages in school you have a 'helper' in your Classroom which is basically a kindergardener and helps those who need more time, can't read as good as others etc. and I've seen so many children and never would I make fun of them, gossip is just how your observe if it turns malicious it's bullying.
@@nocando4037 Other than “cute gossip” like “oh this student did the cutest thing today” the only time I heard “gossip” was about kids that would be extremely mean to other kids and teachers and when the parents were confronted they’d say, “oh that can’t be true he’s such an angel at home!” after the kid would bully and trip kids with no remorse…
Not surprised. I’ve been punished berated in front of other students and removed from class and sent to the office for my disabilities by public school teachers.
tbh as someone who has an abusive parent, the part about enjoying the parents getting upset with their kids is disgusting to me. when situations like this happened to me during school, my parent would not just be upset when we got to the car, she would be screaming at me at the top of her lungs about how lazy and untrustworthy i am the second we were out of the public eye. keep in mind, i have adhd and asd and often the only reason she didnt know about these things is because i feared this reaction when my 504 plan wasnt enought to help me keep up in class.
The yelling the teachers see is what the parent feels okay showing the public. It’s worse in private. Even if it’s not more yelling. Even if it’s not a kind of punishment the kids understand at the time as abnormal. Do not praise the outrage of adults willing to attack their own children in public. The hours and hours of screaming and the snide comments that follow for months even years afterwards, it’s bad enough an unhealthy parent might enjoy those or feel like they’ve accomplished something. Outside adults backing that feeling up is dangerous in a way they need to accept responsibility for. Have your fun little tiktok content story times about minors getting screamed at for annoying you, knowing you get to go home and get away from their parent, and they don’t.
so true, i hate how that seems to be a common thing for teachers, i understand that parents who always take the kid's side and i'm sure that's annoying but the solution isn't to want the parents to be mad at the kids, you should try to help them not get them in trouble, especially since you don't know if them being in trouble might mean that they come back to school with bruises the next day
My shitty mean teachers were what caused me to drop out at 15. I legitimately stopped going to school because i didn’t have the emotional ability to deal with it. My school was aware that my mother was abusive and that my grandfather was my guardian yet theyd call my mother anytime i “acted out” and smiled when shed come and flip out on me/hit me in front of them. Its gross behavior and dangerous. Im not an adult who’s rebuilding my education and trying to live my best life. I worry for my son who starts school in less than 2 years. Not everyone should be a teacher
I have a super similar story. I was bullied really bad by a teacher, every other teacher knew and so did the principal. I was also being abused at home. I dropped out at 15 and tried to go to a different school and was bullied by students and teachers and was still a used at home. No one cared so I dropped out again. The school system really doesn't care about kids.
As someone who grew up with ADHD and a crippling mental illness, this is exactly why I became a teacher. There’s not enough of us teaching who have been THAT kid before and can advocate for our disabled students. The whole system would change if there was. I make mistakes all the time but I know I’m doing what I set out to do because all the kids with mental illness flock to me every day at lunch and tell me about their meds and ask for advice. I’m glad I can give them what I never had.
this is so heartwarming, im really proud, you probably are a lot of kids favourite teacher. I wouldve loved you if you were my teacher when i was in school
our stories are so similar! i have adhd and ptsd and some others and teachers rarely acknowledged my 504 and now i’m in school to become a teacher. i wish i had a teacher who understood me when i was younger.
Lauran's response is completely manipulative and for the public eye all the way through. Her first one was insanely transparent about how manipulative she was but the ones that followed are basically just as bad. "Guys im not ablist i keep fidget toys in the classroom" "hey look! I'm playing with slime in this video because I'm also part of a marginalized group! You can't blame me!" Despite never exhibiting that behavior prior to her "apology". She also never addressed the exact things she said, she just says "I can't believe I said things that were overtly ablist" without ever admiting the specifics of what was wrong about the things she said
“Barely qualifies for an IEP” really got me. I couldn’t tell you how many times my teachers would tell me I shouldn’t even have a 504 because I acted perfectly “normal” according to them or the best of them all “anxiety isn’t real so you can’t have it” or “ anxiety’s just nerves you’ll get over it” as if I don’t experience the debilitating anxiety every day.
So sorry you had to go thru that, I’ve unfortunately got anxiety (diagnosed a couple years ago, I’ve pretty much recovered from it by now with the meds now tho) and it really does suck. Idk what your anxiety effected iykwim, but mine tricked me thinking into I was going to die at any given moment. It’s terrible :/
This happened to me to I was always referred to as lazy and selfish i will say this loud and proud I WAS ABUSED BY MY TEACHER she called me a liar in front of a whole class and always made me feel lazy and rude whenever I asked for my accommodations respected she abused me and I will never forgive what she did AND SHE STILL IS TEACHING AT THAT SCHOOL which I find the worst part of it all she dose not deserve to still be teaching my heart goes out to you always report if you see stuff like this it’s not okay and they shouldn’t still be teaching and they absolutely disgust me
As a teacher this is handled so poorly in so many ways. Most of my kids with IEPs don't even know what's in them, and I don't even know how many times I've been the first one to sit down with them, show them the document, and talk over what each accomodation actually means and how to get it.
thank you. I feel like teachers getting mad at someone saying "fuck teachers" are like the shitty men who say "not all men". Good teachers know there are shitty teachers out there making live hell for kids. They're their shitty coworkers shit talking the kids they are trying to support at lunch break. Nobody means every teacher is shit, they are just venting about the shitty ones.
i didn't know the full list of accommodations i had on mine until i started high school! i only knew i was able to go sit in another room for tests and could have extra time
@@katherinegriffin you've made me realize that I need to sit my son down and walk him through his IEP. I assumed that the school would sit down with him, but he may have no idea what is even in his (he knows he has one). I wish I had realized this sooner :/
My IEP discussion was how I found out I was diagnosed with autism and major depressive disorder, I barely knew what I was allowed to get and most teachers ignored my IEP
As a person with a 504, I would absolutely break down if I heard that my teacher thought it was "barely qualifying" for it. I'm lucky to have extensions on work and extra time on tests because if I didn't, I would probably have a panic attack due to anxiety. They may be joking around, but I can assure you, those children will cry over being told they're stupid. It'll probably discourage them to stop trying if it's all for nothing.
i’m so certain i’ve had teachers say that abt me too. like “she’s doing fine her grades r good” or “she’s not using the accommodations at every turn” translating into “barely qualifying” for my 504 would send me panicking bad enough to probably trigger my physical disabilities into a flare that could land me in the hospital. ppl not acknowledging their own words man
Not even finished with the video and I'm LIVID! I myself have a 504 because freshman year I was hardly a year outside of cancer treatment. I had physical exemptions in my 504 because simply walking around the school was very difficult for me. I had gym class and I saw my grades were plummeting in that class. I talked to the teacher about it and she basically gaslighted me into thinking I was abusing my 504. I cannot tell you the amount of times I've cried in that class because I couldn't just run across the gym like everyone else, and I was told it's because I was abusing my 504 plan. MY PHYSICAL ACCOMMODATIONS FOR NOT EVEN BEING A FULL YEAR OUTSIDE OF CANCER TREATMENT! I managed to scrape a passing grade for that class but I still think about it to this day
I don’t think people understand how *traumatic* school was for disabled people. I still feel the long lasting effects of this trauma while I’m well into college and it causes a lot of academic problems still.
Me too. I got pulled out of public school in 9th grade because of a mental health crisis, and I still have panic attacks about doing writing assignments.
I've been out of school for more than 10 years and I'm still feeling the effects of it. I'm still working through the trauma. I feel like my life still hasn't started
Literally, especially when it comes to being bullied as well (and teachers never know how to help) cause disability in all forms makes you a target. Plus you know who’s best at diagnosing neurodivergencey quickly? Bullies, that’s who. So many layers of struggling, for those who fall behind and are treated as stupid/lazy, to those who work immensely hard and ‘aren’t supposed to struggle’ with all their work chalked up to ‘talent’. There are simply too many places where school systems, across the world, fail for disabled students. It is a similarly painful and traumatising experience for kids in the UK, I’ve heard a lot about the failings in the US, and honestly i don’t know if there’s a country out there that doesn’t traumatise disabled folk.
Saaaaaame! The PTSD is REAL. And it can hit at random. My trauma mostly came from peers as opposed to teachers, and I managed to still do quite well in school, but the mental toll, the social stress, and lack of work-life balance became horrendous obstacles that I continue to struggle with/overcome. Btw, doing well academically meant neglecting most other aspects of my life because I needed all the time to devote to homework. I derived my self-worth from my grades because it garnered positive feedback from authority figures (and I genuinely loved to learn). It was also how I proved to myself that I wasn’t the “retard” my peers claimed me to be. Even then, the self-worth was incredibly minimal and overshadowed by the severe self-loathing that I developed from being bullied and neurodivergent. I sympathize with those who are also disabled, especially those struggling as a result.
funny how my most abelist teacher said she only was rude and bullied me bc she "knew i was capable of such better work" and the teacher SHE hated the most in the school was the one man to truly care about my illness and wellbeing, he was the teacher who helped motivate and get me to graduate.
oof that hits close. i was a "gifted kid" and took "accelerated classes" where the teacher would pull people out in front of the whole class to yell at kids for not getting a high enough score on the state exam because he "knew he prepared us for a better score".
I'm an Alaska Native and I grew up in an extremely impoverished village. We've had principals come and hold us back from learning our own culture and stereotype me and my people. We've had teachers who would yell at the students and call them "dumb" because they weren't grasping the subject material. We've had teachers yell at students at the top of their lungs for misbehaving and skipping class. They've never stepped back and considered that every single fucking kid in my community is going through trauma and hardships at home. There are kids being abused, mistreated, and neglected because their parents weren't ready to have kids because they were kids themselves (and even then that doesn't excuse abuse) and weren't taught how to be a parent. Instead of being patient and educating the very kids they're meant to teach they yelled at them and called them names. The shit they've said, especially when reveling in "how trouble happened in that car" in regards to telling the parents what's going on is disgusting because you could be contributing to the abuse a child is going through in their home life. I hope they all fucking learn and be more mindful going forward about the consequences their actions and words have
I'm sorry you had to deal with that. No one deserves it. It wasn't your fault. Thank you for sharing something so difficult with us strangers on the internet. Take care of yourself ❤️
I’m sorry that happened to you, I moved to Alaska 4 years ago and have learned from my native friends the difficulties and frustrations they’ve had with school, more commonly with their parents/grandparents experienced those things. Education in Alaska has a long way to go. Thank you for sharing your story more people need to know about this.
I had abusive parents. I was a kid with an IPP (Canadian IEP). If a teacher told my parents about missing assignments or similar issues I would be abused when I got home. This is funny to these teachers. Thanks for encouraging child abuse.
I grew up with an IEP, and it does hurt me to hear this…did the teachers think I had it easy? That I was slacking off? The teachers never treated me differently but the students always said I had it ‘easy’
I had an IEP, they didn't accommodate for me and still said I had it easier when I couldn't make it through a day without freaking out and being sent home
Exactly! I had an IEP, and I was in special ed classes. I had the worst time In hs. The fact that I was an autistic + suicidal student, made it even worse. I had horrible mental health, no family or friends to rely on, either. No teacher really helped me or was patient with me. They constantly yelled at me, guilt tripped me, bullied me etc. I even had a paraprofessional (few of them), which made my life worse. I could go on and on but that that point, it would be considered trauma dumping.
TOD is honestly riddled with such awful takes and teachers mocking their students. I used to follow them but they mentioned like purposefully putting the introvert shy quiet kid with a loud one so they could settle the kid down- that made me fume!! As someone who struggled with learning and was quiet and got put in that situation time and time again!! I’m glad someone’s finally talking about it!
i was disgusted when i saw another video about a year back about parent teacher conferences and omg they were happy about getting certain kids in trouble i.e the loud annoying ones ?? you mean the children acting like children ?
for real it's like setting one of the kids up with a babysitter because you don't want to do your job. I was that quiet kid, I had undiagnosed ADD and sitting next to a kid who is screaming, disruptive, and sometimes bothering me just to entertain themselves just sucks especially when that kid CUT ME WITH A PAIR OF DAMN SAFETY SCISSORS LIKE A DAMN PSYCHO
@@eryn2883 depends how old they are tbh. I’ll accept it up until mid-middle school. I’ve seen so many of those loud annoying students literally make teachers cry. The part where I hugely disagree with him is on how it should be done. It’s horrible to use a disobedient child’s wrongs to make fun of them.
That mothers clip from TikTok was so powerful and I felt her pain and as someone who is autistic and struggled in school I got really emotional watching that clip - why do people still look down at people with disabilities when we can’t change how we were born - it’s infuriating to experience
i nearly cried because my sister is the same way. she also has a device that helps her learn to talk. she also has a page like that that my mom reads to know how her school day was. it hit very very close to home for me
i had asthma and severe difficulties with focus, language, and social interaction, i was always alone and had no friends, this clip was painful to me too even tho i don't entirely relate to her daughter
@@ThiCC_YoshI was forced to be alone too, people don't understand the gravity of bullying, even though it is one of the leading cause of (TW mention of death) suicide in teens. (I talk about bullying as what you went through is called bullying by exclusion and is a type of social and psychological abuse) I hope things got better for you, if they have not, I hope they'll get better and that you can live a happy social life with a circle of people that care and like/love you.
@@amelietremblay7582 thank you so much! you too! I think my case is a mix of exclusion and autism/communication disorder bc thats what docs referred me to, or parental neglect. it was the most painful time in my life. even now in college i still don't know how to interact and it was their job to teach me. but i now have 3 friends who accept me. overall social exclusion is one of the most dangerous types of bullying imo because it has almost no proof bc peers can use their already established cliques as an excuse. i wish bullying was taken more seriously we don't want more hours of therapy
I remember in kindergarten my teacher simply hated me as I was special needs (I’m autistic and adhd by was only diagnosed with adhd at the time) she would often go out of her way to humiliate me in front of the class, encourage other students to laugh when she humiliated me and one time said something I will never forget. One day we had a worksheet, well because I was adhd I got done doing the simple spelling questions and decided to doodle on my paper while everyone finished, I think I was drawing some pokemon or something. Well this teacher comes up to my desk snatched my paper ripped it up and started loudly reprimanding me. She said “the words weren’t even spelt correctly! Are you that stupid? At this rate you’ll probably fail out of school before you get to 6th grade!” Well jokes on her I graduated high school at 18 along with the rest of my age group and have had my diploma for a year. As for the drawings? I’m still at it and have gotten my art into a local gallery with people quadruple my age in their 60s
So proud of you. People like that truly make my heart shatter. Like, the person you are speaking to is a CHILD. How anyone could be so cruel to another human being, let alone a CHILD is beyond me.
As a disabled person who had an IEP and a 504, I KNEW which teachers didn't like me because they'd let me know, through words and/or actions, that they didn't appreciate how disabled I am. I also have a mental health plan and all of those things were completely disregard by quite a few teachers, including my principal, who completed overestimated my abilities.
Schools fail us SO often. I’m required to do grade 11 math to graduate highschool and I have NEVER been able to process math and I’ve failed twice. Grad is two weeks away and my math teacher can’t understand how deeply I’m struggling. The one year I had a tutor she was VERY degrading to the point where I broke down.
My 11th grade math teacher failed me because I had a seizure and could only go to the doctor to figure out what the hell is causing them during her class time. She straight up told me "If you just showed up you'd be passing." ALL of my teachers were notified that I would need certain tests taken at a different time (my poor French teacher watched me have the seizure) and my math teacher was the only one who didn't follow directions. 2 assistant principals talked to her about it because they found me crying hysterically in the bathroom during a test once. I had to make up the credit a week after school got out, but I had ANOTHER seizure when I was almost done. Luckily I did make up the credit but this teacher did absolutely nothing to help me, and I will forever hold that over her head.
@@sentientplant9658 god I never get why teachers are like this. I don't have seizures, but I do have migraines, and I had to withdraw from a whole class because the teacher had mandatory attendance on the first day. She required a doctor's note, but anyone with migraines knows you don't drag yourself into your car to go to the doctor when you have one. It's like their first thought is you must be doing this out of some manipulative or lazy mindset despite the fact that no, not only middle aged people have these problems :/ sorry about your seizures impacting schoolwork as well, if you're attending college at least they (usually) seem to be much more understanding.
@Doukz I am in university now and thank goodness I haven't had any seizures since 2019, cuz with my luck they'd happen in the middle of the fricken class 🙃 But yeah the professors overall are so understanding if you're a student who never misses class and you email them when you do. They don't even go by their own "You're getting dropped if you miss x amount of days" sometimes lol Wish high school teachers were more understanding
@@embug82 yeah she made a couple shorts and comments about it and even said she’s just too good or something like that at leaving toxic work environments😂
I have a 504 and multiple of my teachers regularly “forget” that I need study guides and extra help, and when I go to request them, they tell me it’s not allowed because the other students don’t receive them. I have major anxiety and depression issues and the way some of my teachers treat me make it way worse to try and reach out about it. The whole conversation in the podcast is aggravating and honestly disgusting. Thank you for talking about this.
I sincerely hope you find the strength to advocate for yourself more often. You deserve to be heard! Even if a teacher is rude about it, they are in the wrong and you can calmly and respectfully request help you need again and again until you get it.
I love how him saying "this kid is too dumb to spell" is both a subtle and unintentional jab at himself. My guy, you are the one who is supposed to be TEACHING them. Ik the school system is fucked up, but it should be very telling when your student is failing, and you're insulting them.
If you told him that in person, I can guarantee this would be his retort: "IT'S A TEACHER'S JOB TO FOLLOW THE CURRICULUM, NOT TO TEACH THE STUDENT". Literally verbatim what I was told in a math class I was severely struggling in.
@@jackpijjin4088as a teacher… no. I’m shocked that someone ever said that to you. Curriculums often feel restrictive, but it isn’t tough to make accommodations for them. However, I will say it isn’t EVERY teachers’ job to teach kids how to spell.
Teacher here! If you think this is bad, browse through the teaching subreddits. A post saying we should be sympathetic towards our students was CONTROVERSIAL. So many people go into the field of teaching without realizing how brutal and involved it is. That’s why you end up with teachers on TOD being offensive and despicable. If you are reacting this way to your students, you need to leave the field of teaching. Unfortunately, several of these teachers are too prideful to admit failure or fault in their character. That being said, I don’t think Meghan should have said what she said because educators are so aware that the education system is fucked. The teachers that truly care are trying so hard to change it, but it seems impossible. Instead of attacking the entirety of educators, take it up with your politicians and the uninformed parents sitting on school boards making the policies. I’m not excusing TOD because they are causing just as much harm to our purpose. We have uninformed parents and vindictive politicians actively hurting education (look at FL, TX, TN for example), and we have educators who are long overdue for a career change bullying and taking their anger out on their students. This whole situation sucks in its entirety. EDIT: If I wasn’t clear enough in this comment - educators who bully/mock/abuse their students are disgusting and need to change their profession. Not sure where that got lost, but I am not normalizing or excusing this behavior. I simply wish people would look at the whole picture instead of blaming teachers for the failures of the education system because those of us that care about our students are genuinely trying our hardest to make things better.
THANK YOU!! I posted on r/teachers and got so much hate for thinking that teachers shouldn’t give up on students?? It’s ridiculous as a college student pursuing teaching to see all this negativity. No wonder people that I know have quit their student teaching semesters - they work with terrible teachers like these people.
@@GoofyGooberGooberySunrise It’s really unfortunate because I do believe that some of these hateful teachers came into the profession wanting to be a good and kind educator. If you don’t end up in a school with good support systems, it’s so easy to become burnt out and start finding the bad in all of your students
@@msmknz Where am I normalizing being hateful and bullying children? I clearly stated their actions were despicable and that “educators” who react this way to their students need to leave the profession. I am not normalizing “hating” children, simply stating that many inexperienced teachers are torn apart by the system and thus lash out and bully their students - which, if I wasn’t already clear enough, is absolutely disgusting and inexcusable and that they need to leave the education profession. No one is normalizing anything here, ma’am.
I’m convinced that attitudes like this in education are why it took me until college to get even a whiff of an ADHD diagnosis, and why my high school chemistry teacher, noticing that I was doing poorly in his class, asked if I was “failing on purpose.”
I came back to rewatch this video months later because this situation still grinds my gears. I was never a dedicated fan of the boredteachers brand, but I did sometimes see tiktoks from a few of the teachers associated with it like Miss Rogers who eventually left the group. I somewhat remember some vague posts about what it was like working there and that it wasn't a good environment. This video being brought back into my feed reminded me of that and how I kind of wish there was a deep dive into the group because from what I've seen it kind of looks like a mean girls clique.
Mine got in my face (6th grade) and told me i wasn't trying as hard as everyone else infront of the whole class after telling them they'd been working hard and doing a good job-
The "barely qualified for an IEP" really bothered me. There is no "barely". Either they have a disability and need an IEP or they don't. No matter how "minor" you see their disability as, IT IS STILL A DISABILITY! They still need help. They still have special needs. Her minimizing a child's struggle in the classroom is just flat out disgusting.
I apparently don't qualify for an IEP because I'm not failing class. Nowhere in the criteria for an IEP is there anything about failing classes, just that a disability must negatively impact a student's education
That is awful. Do you think you could appeal it? I know a lot of people who have had to file several appeals before they got their IEP. It is such a shame that they make people fight so hard for something they need especially when they are clearly s struggling. @@ashstargloww
I have a lot of students that barely qualified for an iep. Because it isn't actually based on disability. For example. I work for a private tutoring company. The vast majority of our students have ieps but as a private company, we don't follow them. And the parents don't want us to. I have a junior in High School whose iep says he can use a calculator for all math problems. All. 1+1? Can pull out a calculator. 2-1? Yep pull out the calculator! Because according to his iep. He can't do math. At all. Guess what?! We don't use calculators. He's doing pre algebra with us, without a calculator. In School, he's in a 4th grade level math class and always gets a calculator. His iep was given because he was behind and no one wanted to work with him, so they just gave him an out. I have another who's a 6th grader who came in with an iep that says she can't read aloud. Guess what? She's reading 8th grade level material out loud to me. Shocking huh? It's almost like it you actually take the time to teach the material and work with the kid at their level. Like we used to before no child left behind, we could correct the issues and remove the majority of the ieps. Yes Schools give them out for anything now. Not just disabilities. But laziness, refusal to work, etc. And it's actually the logical issue if you think about the system as a whole. Schools get funding based on test results. Test results from iep kids do not count. So if all your kids are behind because you were forced for decades to pass them on with their age group, you start to hand out ieps to correct for lower test scores to keep your funding. It's a cycle.
@@robingalbraith323I agree with you 100%. I was a student that qualified for accommodations that I didn't need, and it negatively impacted my education. If someone is struggling, making school "easier" for them isn't always the answer.
Huh that is an interesting point. I can see how that would happen. I definitely understand how someone can barely qualify for an IEP. I was more so reacting to the tone of the teacher in the vid. As a mom to a special needs kid I have seen the same kind of tone from alot of educators. Either through my own experience or through friends. I guess it would also vary depending on the district/county because where I currently live they hardly give them to students, even after jumping through all the necessary hoops. However where I went to school they kept pushing my mom to get me and IEP after being diagnosed with ADHD. The whole system is flawed for sure. I appreciate the time you took to respond. It definitely lent some perspective that hadn't considered @@robingalbraith323
These teachers are probably the type of adults who pretend that kids "don't get beaten anymore" while ironically being pro-beatings at the same time. Honestly, those type of people are sketchy as hell.
Yeah I can’t tell you how petrified I was of parent teacher meetings because I knew I would get absolutely chewed out with a slew of verbal abuse and my father going into a rage the second we got home. I was a very ‘good’ kid at school and always tried my hardest with any work but when your teachers are told they need to come up with at least 3 positives and 3 ‘negatives’ - things to work on. I knew my father would always have something to scream at me about which usually ended up in ‘punishments’ too. Found out in my early 20’s that I have Autism which is why my teachers were always commenting on how I just didn’t try to relate to my peers, how I was intentionally being obtuse (when they were actually inferring something when they spoke to me) and why most of the time when we had ‘free study’ or self directed learning time I wouldn’t do the activities in the ‘right’ or ‘proper’ order. It hurts knowing I was bullied by not only my peers but my parents as well. The majority of my teachers were great but it hurts to know that those teachers who didn’t and would openly joke and make fun of me in front of my parents on the parent teacher days, could have also been mocking me in the staff room and with their friends. But you know, at least I’m not a student with an IEP in a class taught by teachers with millions of followers who openly mocks me for the entire internet to immortalise forever so… I can’t imagine that if I had a child, I would feel safe sending them back to such a toxic classroom. Kids are so intuitive, especially kids with disabilities who are more likely to experience bullying from their peers or get weird looks from strangers. They know they are different and they know when someone is hostile towards them whether it’s obvious or not.
REAL. When I was little, when I ever got in trouble, my dad would yell at me and slam my fingers into the door, next to the hinges so my skin would get stuck and them. I would have skin peeling off my fingers and everything.
I was diagnosed with sensory processing disorder at a very young age but was not diagnosed with ADHD until I was 15. My mom, who was a special needs teacher who taught at my high school, and I discussed getting me accommodations due to multiple sensory meltdowns caused by chaotic class environments. I already had an IEP because I was enrolled in talented art. My mom pulled her boss, who was in charge of accommodations, aside and discussed it with her. During one encounter where my mom was showing my grades to her boss, I was walking by and got called over. (I had always been academically successful, and in this instance had a 4.0 gpa with straight 100s). This woman looked me in my eye and told me that my grades were too good for me to need accommodations and that I would be better off trying to be enrolled in gifted classes instead. I have had to leave classrooms in tears because I couldn’t think, before medication I would cry because everyone else could follow along so easy but I couldn’t cope with the many distractions. During my actual test for ADHD the first question I was asked was “What are her grades?”. When the doctor was told I was an “A student” I was almost dismissed as having ADHD. Disabilities aren’t always visible or noticeable, they don’t always fit a mold that people without disabilities create. Sorry for the long comment and I thank you for your time and patience. Also for my fellow neurodivergent/ disabled students, stay strong; you will always be your strongest advocate and only you can define yourself.
Her saying the kids 'barely' qualify for an IEP is why it took me until high school to get one, I was always seen as too 'high functioning', despite me trying to communicate with adults that I was struggling.
I'm currently in college majoring in Education and the ableism is still so present even in this environment. I've had classmates compare autistic people to animals, one said they were like bulls and would hurt people if provoked. I've seen more than one praise Autism Speaks and have had professors show their videos in class as positive examples. It's jarring as someone who grew up autistic in the school system to see how awful the teachers coming into the field are. That one comment about "Oftentimes, a teacher is a child's first bully" really is true. I'm just happy the discussion never went past autism because I dont think I could've handled it
As someone who is Autistic/ADHD along with other Disabilities and recently got my teaching credential last year and is now going into my first year of teaching, I agree! I saw sooooo much ableism throughout the education program. I had to resist the urge to throw my Special Education textbook across the room because of how wrong most of the information is from the r-slur to the push for ABA as a good solution for Autistic people. It made me super angry as a Disabled student of the program myself. I've seen a massive misunderstanding of Autistic people by my peers and professors that I would call out on. Not very fun, but eh. Education is littered with ableism and it seriously sucks! 😒 From how they talked about Autistic people to ADHD students to Physically Disabled students. It was super clear to me that Disability related experiences and history weren't being taught enough (I am a history teacher). No wonder teachers can be the biggest bullies for Disabled students! Their ableist biases aren't checked and Disabled voices aren't being heard in the classroom. I had to explain to a professor that has a Autistic son that Autism Speaks is viewed as a hate group and how ABA is viewed as abusive for Autistic people. But that is a big reason I chose to become a teacher. I want to advocate for students to be treated as actual people especially Disabled students and recognize there is nothing wrong with differences. To fight for accommodations and accessibilities for all students. I'm so sorry you experienced that within your education program in college and I relate hard! Absolutely disgusting that you experienced that! It's hard when we as Disabled students have to foremost be advocates about Disabilities because it's clear Disabled people weren't really included in the curriculum. I grew up in education constantly having to fight to be treated with respect and dignity as a Disabled student by my teachers and peers. When we hear what people actually think of Autistic people, it just shows how little they understand us. Their ableist viewpoints shine through! Anyways, I hope the rest of your time in college goes well and good luck! Rooting for you as another Autistic person! Whatever you decide, I hope you end up where you need to be!❤
@arabellasterwerf7980 Thank you for your support! And yeah, the push for ABA therapy is another thing that's big here. One of my classmates was actually working in ABA therapy while going to classes, and I was just so upset that she would willingly go into a field that causes so much harm, even with recent revisions! She talked about her patients like they weren't even people, just things that she had to take care of or play games with. I feel you on having to fight for accommodations and respect also. Elementary school was terrible, and most of my teachers didn't like me because of my IEP because they didn't "sign up" to have a disabled student in their mainly non-disabled class. I felt so othered and so ashamed whenever I had to ask for help or any sort of accommodation. My classmates were bad, but the teachers who were supposed to help me were awful! It's also why I'm working to become a teacher, so I can help and advocate for other disabled students in ways I didn't have as a kid. Thank you again for your kind words and your encouragement!❤️❤️
@@shamrockshake3828 Oh yeah, I had an ex housemate who worked in ABA and I made it clear I hated ABA. But she turned out to be one of the most abusive ableist people I have ever met. She was abusive to me, an Autistic/ADHD adult, where at least I could/would advocate for myself at the time. I am saddened that she even worked with Autistic children. Poor kids! She infantalized and scapegoated me. It is so sad that the people who are our biggest bullies and ableist abusers are the ones who end up in positions of power to hurt us. Thankfully I had a wonderful support system that got me out of that along with me advocating for myself to leave the situation. I recognized what she was doing to be abusive. I was even worried she would end up physically violent. Thankfully, I ended up living afterwards with an amazing housemate after that. Yeah ABA therapy was pushed within my program too. I literally objected to it within the classroom and was critical of the practice presented by the Professor. Wow! That classmate sounds like a piece of work! Screw her! Yeah I also experienced abuse from peers and especially teachers. I also was explicitly targeted by teachers and bullied by them because I was a Disabled student. It's amazing how those of us go into careers to be better role models and supports for people who were like us because we didn't experience it growing up. To be that one adult who supported other Autistic kids. I am rooting for you! We need more Disabled people and especially Autistic people within Education! Elementary school is also super brutal. Honestly, the whole education system needs to fixed! Even as a student teacher last year, I would try to education students on different experiences. Students found out I am Autistic and it was hilarious seeing each students' different reactions when they realized I didn't deny it when asked. I just answered their questions and provided my own lived experiences. After that one moment, they didn't care. I think they slowly realized I knew a lot about the topic and was passionate. It was kinda funny because maybe they were expecting me to freak out. I didn't. 😂 What those teachers said to you wasn't ever ok! That kind of ableism is soo disgusting! You deserved better! Anyways, I am glad more Autistic people want to become educators! You aren't alone! There are many of us! Even if you don't stay in education, I can see you will be an amazing advocate for other Autistic people. Future Autistic kids will be blessed to have the support of an actual Autistic adult who cares about them that we didn't get growing up. All of us Autistic people must support each other! 😁❤️
@arabellasterwerf7980 Geez, that housemate sounds terrible! Glad you got out of there, genuinely! I can only imagine how those kids feel having to be stuck with her. I agree, we definitely should have more Disabled people (especially Autistic and Neurodiverse people) in education. Maybe then we can really start to break down these ableist biases and stigmas in the field! Every child deserves to have a good education and to grow up supported!
@@shamrockshake3828 Yeah she was! Yeah I think of those kids and my heart hurts. I 100% agree! We definitely need more Disabled people (especially Neurodivergent people) in the field! Because those ableist biases and stigma around Disabled people can be broken! Agreed!! All children deserve to have a good education and feel safe by being supported. Especially Disabled kids deserve to be supported and allowed to thrive as themselves!❤️
Teachers being influencers is so problematic and is borderline impossible to do ethically. Imagine being a student or parent who's had this teacher and they end up talking shit about your kid online or using them for content. Not to mention the teachers on tiktok who film their students for content.
The only ethical teacher influencers are the ones that take jabs at other teachers for bad practices in teaching. The kids don't deserve to be made fun of, they're children. They're learning. You don't know what they are going through in the learning process. You should always punch at or above your weight, never below.
100% agreed, also that one teacher/tiktoker who SHIPS his STUDENTS has always left such a bad bad feeling in me.. idk how any of his students' parents are okay with that, it's so creepy.
I've seen teachers who make content and seem to be ethical, but it's less focused on the students and more just on helpful tips for other teachers/educators (ideas to make lessons more fun, cute/cheap things you can buy as prizes for students, etc).
The only teacher I watch that makes content is Ms. Chang, a lesbian teacher who teaches a gifted elementary class. Her videos are usually showing the creativity her students have during lessons or chats (re-enacted by herself), the toxicity of other teachers that don’t agree with non-traditional methods, and lunchtime vids showing how her wife pranked the meal she packed for her (all tame and still edible/non-toxic and only to one of many items at a time). I’ve never felt anything but comfortable watching her videos, and I love her energy and acceptance.
When I heard, they "barely qualify for an IEP", my first thought was "who are you to decide that". Absolutely insane thing to say right off the bat, and really indicated to me how this whole video was going to go.
I didn't have anything like an IEP, but have profound unilateral hearing loss. I once had the school's head of swimming yell at me for "ignoring him" when he should have known I had it considering I was part of the swim team for 6 YEARS and sent in medical forms every year about my hearing loss. If you're not fully deaf, people will often just ignore that you need accomodations still, so frustrating.
Funnily enough, the school itself was good, especially during the pandemic - providing exceptions to masks for my teachers. But there were not accomdations in classes for aural learning exercises.
Yup so true! I'm fully Deaf myself and even though I get really good "use" out of my CIs and can talk "normally" I often decide to sign only in educational situations where I normally wouldn't bother because they don't take my accommodations seriously otherwise. While there are serious discriminations that can happen if you're visibly disabled, it also sucks when you're /not/ visibly disabled.
@@cjboyo do you have ADHD? Bc I do and I have similar difficulty with auditory processing and need others to repeat themselves a lot and i have a constant fear of people thinking I'm just not listening
I am deaf and had awful experiences with ableism in school, to the point that I had to be homeschooled instead. Teachers like this are unfortunately so common.
THIS! I'm autistic and have ADHD and dyscalculia. Eventually I had to be homeschooled too because I started having anxiety attacks and not functioning in class, but not before I was physically abused by the special ed teachers. People who say homeschooling should be illegal because they think all homeschoolers are wacky religious fanatics are beyond ignorant, because there's nothing wrong with REGULATED homeschooling; sometimes, it's literally the only option for education if you're disabled or ill (mentally or physically). The most that needs to be done is that it needs to have better moderation from the school system to ensure the thinks being taught at home are accurate and comprehensive.
Good news! The supreme court ruled on a school in Michigan and mandates qualified interpreters for d/Deaf and HOH students. (Typically passed the EIPA w/ a 3.5 or 4.0+, depends on the state. Some also do temp stuff with a BEI I, II, or III, OR an NIC cert)
I had to leave an elementary school because they put a child with a dog in my grade when I was SEVERELY allergic to dogs. They said it’s for the sake of accommodating that child but what about the other child who was allergic to fucking dogs? They could’ve put the child in another classroom, but actively chose not to. I had to leave because I would be sick all day and they didn’t even try to help.
As a “barely qualifies for an IEP kid this actually made me tear up. The way they’re talking about these kids is like confirmation of my worst fears as a kid. School was hell for me and I only made it through high school by the grace of God because of school systems and educators with attitudes like this
it is so telling that her apology and idea of "doing better" is just having a bin of fidget toys in the classroom--i was a 1st-12th IEP/GE kid (gifted and also wildly learning disabled) that was never taken 'seriously' in either direction/at the cost of one another--she is the exact type of teacher i was afraid of too):
Stuff like this is so damaging. It hurts everyone but it hurts the students the most. Teachers are hurt by this because it makes their job harder to have to actively fight against the impressions that stories like this create in students. Students arent stupid or ignorant or unobservant. They WILL see you say stuff like this podcast clip, and they WILL remember it forever. Just exactly the same way you might forget something you said in anger, but your child who received it will remember it for life. This sort of thing is incredibly insidious and it absolutely pisses me the hell off as an ADHD person who was treated to the "other end" of the spectrum. I was identified as "gifted" because my great auditory processing and linguistic skills made me look great at testing in a lecture-heavy environment like my schools. But I'm not some genius or anything and that gifted treatment had adverse consequences on my ego that I'm still disentangling myself from to this day. We look at educattion as something to be objectively evaluated. With students passing or failing or excelling or being totally left behind, based on numerical scores that reflect a state-hegemony-based ideal. This is a product of the industrial revolution which spurred on the development of education in the US as the need for middle management personnel increased Corporate America's need for people who could read, write, and do math, (like me) But this isn't a real education. This is just the industrialized shaping of children into workers, and a great many of our tensions with how education is done stem directly from this internal conflict between a more idealistic, enlightening value of education, and the kind of capitalist concerns that ACTUALLY drive decisions about curricula. I don't think the solution to this is homeschooling but I'm only qualified to sort of see the shape of the problem. I don't even know where to start with a solution aside from being pretty sure that Homeschooling is not it.
As a fellow "barely qualifies" kid, I never even got my first IEP meeting... All my teachers just kinda, didn't do anything. It's bonkers to me how little the system and some teachers care that even after "proving" you "deserve" an IEP, it still is a never ending battle. So much other crap happened to me in school but if just one teacher had bothered to pay attention when my issues started showing up around grade 1, I wouldn't still be trying to graduate high school at 21. I hope you're doing alright and have proved all those teachers wrong❤️❤️❤️❤️
I had a 504 because i became partially paralyzed. My one teacher was incredible and so accommodating. the other forgot about me and didn’t offer help which made me fall behind massively.
Lauran's comment about "barely qualifying" really pissed me off because I was denied an IEP plan for 8 years by my school district and it took months of meetings, tests, and other tedious things to finally get it. The worst part was that my teachers at the time were practically begging my mom to keep fighting for it because they saw that I needed it and the district kept saying I was just lazy and kept pushing back the necessary tests hoping we'd give up. With Lauran saying that she's practically invalidating the efforts and literal battles some students go through just to get the help they need. (For context I have PTSD, ADD, and Generalized Anxiety Disorder.
As someone with adhd and gad that went undiagnosed for years, I thought that I was just stupid because my teachers and the district just treated me like I was. I eventually stopped complaining and started keeping quiet and apologizing constantly because I was scared that they would yell at me for disrupting class or stuttering. I slowly stopped caring about school and eventually, when I was able to, switched back to online learning so I wouldn't have to be treated like a freak constantly
are we the same person??? i had to go through intense testing for my district to give me an iep (for being “gifted” ew) they wouldn’t give it to me because i scored “low” on state standardized testing (90th percentile as far as i remember actually. thats weird. like. not average? idk. i havent thought about that). but i finally had to get diagnosed with autism and ptsd and an iq test taken (!!!! ew). i wish that it wasnt so hard, had my family not been in good financial standing i wouldnt have been able to get accommodations!!!! makes me angry
That really sucks... did you try for a 504? It's a step below the amount of accommodations you get with IEP'S, but it's still so much better than nothing I went from an IEP where I was able to have a scribe to a 504 where I still was able to get breaks, sometimes reduced workload, and extended time The problem was some of my teachers didn't even know I had it or ignored it -_- So unprofessional. I hope you didn't have to go through school with no accommodations :(
Schools operate on two modes: Ableism feat. Inspiration Porn and Ableism feat. Catty Comments. It took me ages to acknowledge casual ableism as a serious issue. I never realised the hurt I caused everyone and myself by it.
thank you so much for changing. we really do appreciate it. people often did invalidate my feelings about casual ableism, i always assumed that i was crazy and stopped talking about it. this generation is amazing in the way that it’s so progressive.
just want to say good job on the self improvement, casual ableism is so common and it can be hard to learn about it when everyone around you thinks its fine
And “I find your pain inspiring to me because it makes me feel better about my life (which is probably Shittier than yours by my own immature choices) so can you stop trying to get help bc I’ll make the catty comments stop asking for help and let me feel good knowing I can’t do anything to help even if I wanted to uwu” thanks, adult supposed to protect and educate me
In 2017 I was dealing with fresh ptsd and my teacher was well known for being a bit of a hard ass I had just got back into school, I was maintaining my good grades and for some reason my teacher snapped at me infront of the whole class screaming “do you want to go back to kindergarten” now I can’t tolerate any yelling whatsoever because of what he said, and the major affects it had on me, I am afraid of loud noises to the point anything that I deem to loud it feels like my ears are burning my heart races I can’t breathe and I have a major panic attack.
Back when I was still in school, I had to be pulled out for a semester because I was in something called an out-patient program. Only one of my teachers actually helped me, my calculus teacher aptly named Mrs Love. Not only am I Autistic, but at that time I was not participating in class because of the entire out-patient thing so I had to teach MYSELF the material. Mrs Love literally came to my house after she was done at the school and personally tutored me. And she kept coming to my house to help me after I was released from the program. She's the only teacher that actually tried to help me. She's the only adult at that time to see I was struggling. Everyone else let me down. I graduated in 2015, and she is STILL in contact with me. That ONE teacher is my personal superhero.
If I didn’t have teachers like that I probably wouldn’t have gotten through it (my hero’s were the lunch people and the ram room teachers who I would talk to at lunch and the janitors) they have no idea how much they have done we should have a day for teachers like them
to be completely honest as a student that struggled with disabilities, mr williams apology seemed the most genuine. because he recognized that even though he didn’t say anything, his choice to not say anything was just as impactful. he also seemed to genuinely put in the work in learning and seems to continue that process even after the initial controversy has kind of blown over in popularity
My boyfriend is physically disabled and having to listen to stories of how some teachers treated him makes me sick. I'm so nervous about having kids and sending them to school.
First real “bully” was like a 75 yr old teacher who’s dead as hell rn but in primary school he shat on me during a trip in front of the lunch line and my friends 😊!! And then I told my parents and he got permanently demoted to substitute teacher and teacher helper!!! yippee!!!!!!
