When I saw the video about this before your surgery I thought "At last someone is talking about this@!" so thank you for that. I am glad you are on the road to recovery. I did want to say though that for ages and ages we have been calling these body parts the wrong thing. I have even had a nurse tell me I was wrong so I think this is very very common. "Your vagina is the passage inside your body that connects your uterus (or womb) to the outside of your body. You bleed through your vagina during your period. The vagina is also the passage through which a baby is born. Your vulva is the name for the genitals on the outside of your body." What we are seeing on the outside is actually the vulva. There are some articles out there about the aging vagina including issues like prolapse which also affects us older ladies so I recommend we all read up as it does pertain to our health. Here is one article I found www.hellahealth.com/blog/wellness/the-vagina/
Thank you very much for this informative comment, I will pin it to the top so everyone knows the proper terms of our organs within our pelvic region - that way when we go to speak to our Doctors we can explain our problems more clearly. I'll say it again - I LOVE the discussions we have here, so many smart and nice people! We are all learning SO much from each other!
Wow! How refreshing to hear this topic. We gals of a particular age need more education and remedies for such. Thank you so much for your info on this topic
So glad to hear you're healing! As a bedside nurse of 40 years ( now retired) you wouldn't believe the human body issues I've dealt with, both male and female. To be able to discuss things compassionately and openly is such a gift we share with each other. You're wonderful for sharing on your channel. Continued recovery to you!
Thanks so much for your kind thoughts Carol, and thank you for all of your love and compassion you've given others in your nursing career. All the best to you! x
As a male. I can't help but admire you for opening the doors of this somewhat sensitive topic, you have obviously opened a forum that can help not only women but men like myself who are pretty well out of touch with what challenges maturing women meet, it's helped me to understand that sensually speaking us guys has to approach sexual encounters with loving gentleness, taking time to gently please, and not going hard at it to try and get her achieve orgasm, but rather cover other areas of her body first with loving kisses and soft touches untill she is in organic bliss and ready for loving penitration, it has to be loved based with Gentle care for her unless she request's any other preferences of her own during some moments. Thanks for you help.
I know what you mean about this being a bit of a 'taboo' subject in our age group, and never discussing the topic with our mothers. When I was a teenager, a book that became very popular was "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex, but Were Afraid to Ask." I bought myself the paperback, read it through. Then I gave it to my mother! She was stunned, but then said that she had never brought up the subject because her mother had never talked to her about sex, so she didn't know how to broach the subject. She also told me that when she married she thought sleeping in the same bed with a man was what made you pregnant. So you can imagine her fear and shock when she realized what it entailed. I promised myself that when I became a parent I would answer any questions my children asked regarding sex and reproduction keeping it age appropriate so they would understand. It was a self-promise that served me and my children well. They were never afraid to talk to me when they needed to, because they knew I would answer them honestly and 'clinically', without judgement. 😊 I'm so glad you are on your way to healing. Wishing you a speedy recovery 🙏
I absolutely love you, Kerry-Lou for opening up this critically important topic for women… and continuing the discussion in subsequent videos tied to your surgical recovery. This is exactly what we women-especially post-menopausal women-need… to feel comfortable and secure in our own bodies and in talking about ALL our body parts with no shame or embarrassment! I’m so relieved your surgery went well and your pain is minimal! I was worried about you! Please talk to your physician (if you haven’t already) about starting a regular and lifetime routine of vaginal estrogen (or vaginal DHEA/Intrarosa) to restore healthy vaginal and vulvar tissue. Vaginal and urinary system atrophy due to hormonal deficiency will continue to progress/worsen if not treated. The dose is extremely low and thus shown to be safe longterm for most women.
Love you back! Thanks for always leaving such thoughtful, and intelligent comments, I really appreciate it. Yes, she did say that this was a thing that I would always have to be on top of, using vaginal estrogen. I'll talk about that next time. I think YOU should start a channel on this subject, you're so knowledgeable! All the best to you! ;-D
Glad everything went well. I'm so glad to see somebody tackle this subject. I suffered this problem for a lot of years. My husband has passed this year so I won't worry about it again, but I'm sure your gonna help other ladies who in the past did not speak about this. That taboo subject. Keep up the good work Kerry-lou.
For years we have been hearing about ED and the need to remedy this. I personally am nauseated by being bombarded with messages on ED. You are truly a ground breaker to talk about our vaginas. I remember seeing your post on women shaving their faces. I thought WOW I have been doing this for years! I thought I was the only one who did this. You brought a more comfortable method to my attention and I am sure to many others. You are truly a groundbreaker! Keep up the great work. I love you, beautiful white headed lady! Thank you so very much.
Thanks so much Linda! Yes, so much noise about all the male problems - Now it's time for women to raise the volume and to receive some much needed attention and proper care!
This year I experienced what felt like paper cuts on my labia sending shooting painful sensations through my body. My doctor says it’s lichen sclerosis and I am waiting to see a vulva specialist. My vaginal area is not only sore but webbing over. Very strange indeed. So far only topical solutions have been offered. I also use a sitz bath daily with salt. I’m 73. Oh the challenges of an aging body. I love that you are talking about this and providing a safe platform for open discussion.
It's so nice to hear someone talking about this issue! I'm 72 & I was somewhat raised that sex was kind of a no no issue. I had a great sex life with my husband for 44 years until he died. My mother, well I never talked to her about anything like this!
Hello Kerry-Lou! Just like I wrote last week, what a wonderful, courage and intelligent woman you are. Speak speak speak, for so many women this is their opportunity for don't feel alone! Big hug!!!
Dear Kerry-Lou, I'm happy to hear surgery went well, wishing you all good and a well recovery. And thank you for talking about this issue, some day it might be me or someone else experiencing it, and now I know what to concider about it. I'm happy that you address this topic, thank you. Women's health is often very little discussed, espescially when it comes to our vulva and vagina. It needs to be addressed and talked about moore. When it comes to sex and broadening the possibilities of having it with increasing age and or with health issues, I initiated from the very beginning with my husband that sex should be more than penetration. So I made so much more than penetration erotic for us from the very beginnng of our relationship. It was kind of a "teamwork" of course, but being focused on showing him and teaching him and exploring his erogene zones (and mine!) as one example, it was a way into it. Making sex be about so much more than just penetration, and making it natural and what suited us both from the very beginning has been very nice for us. This way it isn't that big of a loss if one of us or both can't have or perform in intercourse anymore. As an example. The intimacy will not stop instantly if our body's park us before our desire does, so to speak, it will still feel erotic even if his or mine cannot perform anymore. I hope this isn't too much or overshare, if it is, please feel free to delete this post. I have more examples, but I think people understand what I'm trying to say, he he. Thank you for bringing up this important issue/theme. Wishing you all the best. Hugs from Kristin ❤
I love EVERYTHING about this, thank you, thank you for sharing Kristen! I'm hoping that everything us women are talking about here reach men's ears, making them aware and sensitive as to what's going on with their partner. We are fortunate that our husbands are very sweet, sensitive, and willing (and enjoying) learning new tricks perhaps. All the best to you! xxx
I really appreciate your sharing of your experience. Also, I appreciate you helping us get together, even if on RU-vid, and having somewhere to go and find answers. Thank you so much.
Thank you for speaking about this issue. To many folks give up on sex way to early. I am a 71 year old man. My wife and I are both cancer survivors. We are working to keep the lust alive. 😀
Kerry-Lou, you do you. I support whatever intelligent decision you made re: your own body.❤ I applaud you for bringing attention to this often "taboo" topic. The struggle is real❤❤❤
I love this video and your complete control autonomy over your body. 🙌🙌❤️Keep the videos coming we girls in our 60s appreciate them.more than you know ❤️Blessings Dear 🙏❤️
My 73 year young vagina thanks you. Have that issue for some time. Trying the cream right now and seeing my gynecologist next week. Such good information and thank you.
Twelve years ago I experienced sudden menopause after chemotherapy. I knew nothing about the effects that the drop of oestrogen would cause. About three years later I started to experience a strange sensation in my vagina. I’m a widow so am not sexually active. The sensation became uncomfortable and several doctors failed to identify the problem, one even sending me away with ibuprofen. 🙄 Eventually after 10 years a lady doctor realised what was going on. By this time the discomfort was debilitating and causing rectal and urinary problems. I was referred to a gynaecologist who prescribed a vaginal oestrogen cream which I administer twice a week and a vaginal moisturiser which I administer every other night. My problem has mostly been solved. I wish more women would talk about this and more doctors would be trained to recognise the symptoms. Glad you’re healing Kerry and thank you for being a brave enough to tackle this sensitive subject ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much for sharing your story! Gynecologists receive VERY little training for menopause issues - just a couple of hours. I'm so glad that you found someone that is treating you right. Wishing you all the best! xx
My wife can't use hormonal cream due to breast cancer surgery and the subsequent treatment. This makes the treatment course more difficult. We wish you all the best in your recovery!
Thanks for your well wishes, and for your comment. Everyone has a different situation, and sadly not all treatments are right for everyone as you said. I am gratified that you are the only guy here that is engaged in this thread on behalf of his wife - this speaks volumes to your loving relationship, and I wish there were more men entering this discussion in a genuine way, seeking to help their partner, or simply understanding the struggles of so many women. I think we have to discuss the male side of this issue too, there's so much to talk about. THANK YOU, and all the best to your wife.
I’ve had breast cancer and have been advised to not have HRT but I can use oestrogen pessaries so please look into this as your wife can use local HRT. It will really help
Thank you for talking about this subject! It is so true that many topics like this get put on the shelf, for whatever reason. Hope you feel better soon!!
I am glad you are healing well. I was in the medical field for almost 4 decades so my friends and I never really had problems discussing our 'v-jayjays' as we called it jokingly. It is a part of our bodies just like our eyes, hands, legs etc.
So happy that all is over and that you’re coming through beautifully. Feel well, heal and thank you for calling our “privates” by its proper name - vagina. I was in the medical field for many years and it’s amazing how many people are embarrassed to mention it. Your videos on this subject are refreshing. I’m looking forward to your next one as always.
. . . thank you for your openess and honesty, I believe discussions like this are necessary and there is nothing wrong with talking about vaginas or talking about aging, this is a natural part of life and not to be ashamed of, thank you for having courage to come forward with this 💙
So great that you are making this journey together, so much easier when one has great support and love. Next video I will talk about a book called "When Sex Hurts" by Andrew Goldstein, MD - it's a real eye opener, and has great resources! Good luck!
You're a gem Kerry-Lou. So pleased you are well & again, thank you for broaching a topic that really should be spoken about freely & without embarrassment. Take good care of yourself 'till next time xx
Thank you so much for talking about this. You are correct women of this generation just don't talk about it we tend to suffer in silence. I hope in the future more women that have the courage you do we can educate each other and have better sexual experiences, without embarrassment. Well-done Kerri.
Thank you for bringing this topic to light ! Menopause really does dry up our bodies . Intercourse can be very painful . I use RepaGyn , It restores vaginal moisture. Im so glad you are healing. Looking forward to hearing more about your recovery and if the surgery helped. Thank you for all you do for maturing women!
I’m so happy you’re healing well. I’m glad you and your husband will be about to really enjoy each other again. So proud for you. I think you’re just so brave. You’re really helping me in ways I didn’t know was possible online. I was one of those raised that you never ever ever talk about your “lady bits” and most definitely never about sex or… Well that device one of your commenters mentioned. See?? I can’t even say it in type behind a screen in my own home lol. So much so that when I finally talked to my doctor on Monday I had such anxiety that I cried through the entire thing simply because I could not make myself say va.. lady bits. It was so embarrassing but luckily I have a very kind and understanding doctor who helped me through it. We’re started me on a cream and see where we go from there. But you’re helping me by addressing this is such a real and down to earth way. I’m so grateful I found your channel. Thank you❤
Great info for all women especially those of us that are aging. Thank you. I had my first issues at 58. Horrible itching in perineum and opening of the vagina. Used all kinds of creams and thought it was a yeast infection. Nothing changed so I'm thinking I'm allergic to something, I changed laundry soaps, shower soaps, and toilet paper. Nothing helped the terrible itching. Finally a young resident at the practice I went to immediately diagnosed it as vaginally atrophy and thinning of the tissues. She prescribed a very mild estriadol cream to be inserted nightly for 7 days. After the 1st treatment no more horrible itching. Because I had a total hysterectomy at age 42, my vagina has atrophied. Has no plumpness and also dry, but overall have not had any issues other than the itching. Now at 64, I am noticing that due to pelvic floor area being basically hallow I am having issues with my bladder and rectum. They are prolapsing. The vaginally opening and anus opening are practically side by side which is a recipe for bacteria entering the vaginal area and causing infection. The bladder could prolapse into the vaginal opening at some point. I don't have a cervix so it's just the vagina. My dr is aware and will watch closely, but does not recommend surgery, rather advised pelvic floor exercises. I'm trying, but half the time just forget to do them. Talk about your issues with your Dr changed if they won't listen.
Thank you so much for sharing how serious this can be. I'm glad you have a doctor that's monitoring your health issues. Try to keep up the exercises 😉 Wishing you the best of health!
Iam so happy to hear your operation went well, sending you angels to heal you soon my dear. Adore you and respect you for all that you are doing to reach out to all women. Iam falling short of words to praise you... Take care and stay charming as you are..
I’m glad to hear that you’re healing, and I’m incredibly grateful to you for beginning this discussion of a subject that affects so many of us older ladies! Carry on healing. Xx
this subject/video should be seen by men too, if you care about your spouse you need to know this and help her through it and be sympathetic to her needs etc.
Thanks so much for watching and understanding, Barry. I’m hoping more men will see this. You’re right, it’s not enough for only women to know what’s going on! 😉
Hi Kerry-Lou, so glad youre proceedure was a success!...so, so, glad you are talking about these issues that affect so many of us ladies over 60 + its always comforting to know we are not alone in these things!!..intimacy certainly does change for us & Husbands & partners at this age so it is worth having feedback about what other people do to address this!!!!...take care now, all the best, from Margaret in Australia!!!!
Thank you for discussing this topic. We are all aging for the first time, so it is new for all of us. It is nice to know there are options and videos like this help us realize it is all part of the process.
Thank you for the update. I'm glad you're healing well. I'm now on my way to read the comments from your previous video because I'm curious. I've not found a ton of information about the subject of sexuality during our later years and it's such a shame. Thanks again for posting
I’m glad your surgery went well. And you’re healing up well also. I’m still glad you shared this with all of us. It’s not something most people would share on You Tube. But I’m glad you did. Because when I go see my doctor I may be talking to her about something like this. And while they’re in there they can put another bladder sling in for me. I had that surgery done a while ago. But when I had to have colon surgery they took my bladder sling out. So I really need that surgery done too. Maybe I can get a package deal.
Thanks for the update! So glad to hear you’re healing well. Best wishes as you continue to get better. 🙏 Thanks again for bringing up this important topic! I know that I’m slowly getting better about talking about my vagina but it’s still hard! Your frankness and sensitivity are super helpful. 🥰. You are performing a real service here. ❤
Hats off to you for sharing intimate details about yourself and your life so clearly and might I say, elegantly. I'm the same age as you and though now divorced my former wife and I were experiencing issues related to perimenopause and then menopause. It's staggering how little we know about this sphere of a woman's life, one that all women go through, yet much of which is simply unknown by most men except for how it impacts their life via their spouse or loved one. I hesitate to comment on your beauty as it has nothing to do with these two videos that I've just seen, the only videos of yours that I've watched so far...but I am struck by it, you really are lovely. It's fantastic that you don't color your hair, I hope that you can influence other mature women to live their golden years with the same flair and fashion.
I hope this surgery is all that is needed to correct your problem. I am a post-menopausal woman also, and I use bio-identical estrogen cream regularly that builds up the thinning tissues of the vagina. I would recommend this to any post-menopausal woman having painful sex. It also helps with lubrication. Sex will never be the same as it was in my reproductive years, but it is much better than before I used the cream. I had surgery for a bartholin cyst on my vulva when I was 30, and both the cyst and the post-surgical recovery were very painful due to all the nerves in that region. Avoiding surgery would be ideal in my mind. I hope this helps others.
I think it’s wonderful that you found what we hope is a solution. Unfortunately, a lot of men are not educated in the vagina. Too many approach sex without patients and communication. Talking with and taking care of your partner can be very rewarding. Use the brain God gave you gentlemen.
Thank you for telling me about the vagina. One month ago I went to have an examination, and the nurse told me, I have to use the some treatment, to make my vagina happy again. 🙂I had never before thought about the burning sensation I felt. Now I know this is normal after menopause.
So happy things went well….thanks for sharing this personal experience. I think it was very brave of you . Glad you feel good🥰I am having what is called a prolapsed bladder, surgery might be the answer. You have made me really relieved for what is to come❤️
Hi Sharon, thank you for your well wishes, I have experienced such support here, it made me realise how many people are going through similar issues. After the surgery, for a few days, I thought, "oh no, what if it doesn't turn out well?" but now I feel 100% better and glad I did it. I hope you have a great experience if you go for surgery. Perhaps try to find women who have gone through it. All the best 💕
Thank you. I want to add that 20% of cervical cancer cases are happening in women over 65, and death rates are up since our government advised not doing Pap tests after 65.
Hi Kerry-Lou so happy to hear that your surgery went well for you. I really appreciate you bringing this subject up. Looking forward to the next video. I am 60 and when I was growing these kinds of feminine issues were not so openly discussed, maybe because our mother's were unsure of what to tell us as well. I remember very distinctly when I was a little girl that every woman I knew at church who was in their late forties or early 50's kind of disappeared for two years. I would ask what was wrong and all the women would look knowingly at each other and say to me, "Oh, she has female problems dear". But I don't think girls today are really getting any more real help and instruction than we were. The people who are supposedly "talking openly" about our "private areas" are really often just making up new crude names for our body parts and know nothing about their health and function. I find that very demeaning. I was taught that to be a lady one needed to be more reserved about these issues, but that too can take us to another extreme. I love your approach to the subject! It is dignified, beautiful, humorous and forthright. Thank you for reaching out to others and showing compassion for what women of our age are going through. I wish you would write a book! :). I would be in line for the first copy.
Thank you so much for your kind comments Delisa, I really appreciate it. It strikes a chord, what you said about the ladies in church - my grandmother died of "female problems" and no-one really knew what the exact cause of death was. How women have been suffering, not being able to speak about these medical issues with friends, family, and in many instances, one's own family! Things are changing though. Best, KL
Nice to meet you ! 61 and I have a prolapse vagina wall, coming down and out about the size of a small egg. I'm using hormone cream and one day I will have surgery to correct it.
Mom had your condition and it was awkward being in the room during the exam. She has good insurance and was able to have a Hysterectomy. That was nothing compared to the brain surgery she had to have a couple of years later. I sure your doctor has warned you about the dangers of infection and problems. I wish you the best and in a week you could be back to normal with surgery.
I wonder if one took a plant based estrogen on a daily basis post menopause if one could avoid these types of problems ? By the way, that plum color is radiantly beautiful on you!!!
Hi, is there anyone who has any good tips for women with this problem but who cant use a hormone cream? I am a 65 yr woman with oestrogen receptive metastatic breast cancer and have had chemotherapy and currently on a targeted therapy (both of which have greatly attributed to the problem) so hormone creams are out of the question for me. I do use non-hormonal internal and external hydrating creams but to be honest they do very little. Thank you Kerry-Lou for sharing, I wish you a speedy recovery and look forward to the updates!
Hi Mave, thanks for bringing this up - I'm going to see if my gyno has any suggestions about this, because many women have the same concern as you do. Sounds like you have been through a lot, wishing you all the best of health in the future.
Thankyou,very refreshing to find info for women having gone through menopause many years ago. The papercut annalagy was so very accurate. My GP has recommended a strong steriod. Upon doing some research this steriod will thin the skin and not to be used internally. Needless to say I am not going to use it. I am wondering if lubricant ,hormone cream is worth trying at my 70 plus age. Perhaps some of your viewers are going through a similar dilemma.
When I was 16 the book Our Bodies Ourselves came out. Full of great information and the anatomy of the sexual areas. The book encourages us to look at ourselves which you talked about.
I'm pleased things seem to be going well, I'm not a woman I was interested because my wife is having some problems after watching this I have made her an appointment, thank you. 🌹
When a friend's daughter was about 8 years old and had to create a sentence using a president's name, this is what she wrote: "George Washington was born in Vagina." ❤️ Heal on, Sister!
There is something called Mona Lisa Touch (a form of laser therapy) that works wonders at eliminating painful intercourse. However, it is pricey and takes more than one treatment. The treatment doesn't hurt - a numbing agent is used. There is some discomfort for the next day or two, that's it. If you can afford it, it really works.
Thanks for bringing this topic to our attention. I have osteoporosis, vaginal dryness, itching and regular UTIs. I have a pessary to deal with stress incontinence and take vagifem. At 76, I still have hot flashes. I followed a thread from your first video which was very helpful (a GMS US male doctor and a British female one). I am now wondering if a low dose of HRT will help with some or all these issues. Apparently, this is not nearly as dangerous now as was recently assumed. I will explore this with my nurse practitioner and/or uro-gynaecologist that I see periodically. I am suggesting that you cover some of these topics in your upcoming videos.
Thanks so much for sharing this Shirley, I will look for that thread, I might have missed it and it sounds like some good additional information. Please let us know how you get on with the low dose HRT, I'm really interested in what you find out. Not sure if you're in the US or not, I live in the US (originally from UK) and doctors are not very HRT friendly here it seems. All the best to you!
I’m 70 yrs young, husband is 66 yrs old. I had a modified hysterectomy (took out uterus, left my ovaries) at age 41. I was prescribed vegetable based estrogen patches a few weeks later for menopausal symptoms as my ovaries shut down. The the effects were very good for many years and I’ve had no problems. After talking to my doctor, I decided to cut the dose in half a couple of years ago, putting a patch on every Thursday or Friday for libido and vagina health reasons. I’ve always had a healthy sex drive and it has slowed somewhat as has my husband. We still enjoy intercourse with my use of the estrogen patches and his use of e.d. Prescription Levitra. So far no issues that Astroglide lube and a vibrator won’t fix and we’re both satisfied. I believe that like any part of your body, “if you don’t use it, you’ll lose it” and know 1 or 2 older ladies whose vaginas have completely closed up. Great conversation, ladies! Thank you! 🥰
I also had regular UTIs, and both my OB/GYN and my urologist recommended that I take a low dose of Estradiol (it’s a cream). It doesn’t take much, but it did the trick. I have only had one UTI in two years since then.
Hi Kerry-Lou, I'm really happy you are recovering well. I am 62 with a fairly active sex life. I go to a Naturopath and receive bio-identical hormones that have Really helped me. I will think good thoughts for you for your recovery. Also, thank you for this discussion!!!!! Jennie
