The Art of Hiring Fake Hitmen 2 

THIS!

I'm all about 100% less of the dying! 😉😄😘

Same!

And both Oscar-worthy and totally unconvincing, laughable performances and excuses

This!

Absolutely! Wouldn't have it any other way!🤣🤣🤣

I had a good laugh over this too lol

Which is so funny on multiple different levels. The website's HIPPA is the "Hitman Information Privacy and Protection Act of 1964", and the real HIPAA is the "Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996". Two Ps vs two As, which is a common misspelling of the real HIPAA, plus he changed the year of the bill which is also hilarious. I knew that all of the mind-numbing studying I've been doing into healthcare laws to get my degree would pay off someday!

@@ndawn90 all those student loans really paid off considering you can give facts like that in the RU-vid comments. 🤠

HIPPA is so important nowadays.

Lol

I expect she was more horrified than anything. Even if you grew not to like your ex, it's something else completely to find out someone you loved and lived with for years, maybe even had a child with, tried to have you killed and was happy when they thought it had happened.

@@Sinsteel well ya. I didn't mean she was never terrified/horrified by all of it. This was 2 years later tho and he had the most b.s. excuses and that's what I meant about her expression. She just looked like she was sick of his idiotic excuses.

Poor girl I felt so bad for her you can see the stupidity in what he did but she was hurt too. I mean can you imagine finding someone you had a child trying to do that

The evil B in the part 1 of this...where the husband still wanted to be with her and was supportingher in court!! Whaaa whaHaT!!? I'm hard to shock but I had to pick my jaw up. It's on camera her giddy about the murder for hire plot. I need to watch cute animals in hats after this.

🤣

🤣😂

😂🤣😂

Lmfao I thought the same thing

I know! That's what I thought. Like really dude? That's not playing it cool. 😂 what a moron.

As someone who worked 6 years as an estate planning paralegal, where I prepared HIPAA Releases every day, that gave me quite the chuckle too!

Me too. HIPPA sounds legit

Good chuckles..

as someone who lives in society and has inevitably been exposed to the general existence of HIPAA because it's common knowledge among literally everybody who has ever gotten any kind of medical care and not some industry secret, I also found it funny. goddamn, you two act like it's a fucking trophy to know that hipaa exists.

@@nadapenny8592 Ive never heard of it so they're is no reason for you to be a jerk.

just watching it now and thought same thing😂😂

"Hey, you wanna go undercover as a hitm-" "Done! Fucking done dude!"

I mean, who wouldn’t wanna do that?!! 😂

If he ever gets tired of being a cop, he could have a successful career as an actor.

Verbally meringue pie

And they're always dumb AF. Win-win-win!😂

Same here!

THIS! It’s definitely refreshing when compared to horrible murders and heartbreaking crimes

Exactly! I was thinking to myself, "Is $2,000 really realistic for murder? I guess I just know know the business well enough. 🤔" 😂

@@losnfjslefn8857 put a little moxie in your step when you do it and there's a shiny new **full** Half Disme in it for you 💰

I think I died laughing at that 😂

So funny LOL

I agree. But how did the woman get 5 yrs & the guy get 20?

@@jupitercyclops6521 I'm just guessing here, but it could have something to do with the alleged domestic violence. Battered Wife Syndrome has been successfully used in murder trials before. So if they believed she was really at the end of her rope and didn't see a way out, they might have taken it easy on her. Just a theory

@@nyxspiritsong5557 but the woman got more time than the man.

@@AmberKelly82 hmmm.... guess I should've watched the entire video FIRST. (I first commented about 2/3 the way thru lol) I'm at a loss. I mean I could kinda sympathize with the one woman who was being abused but the other woman only got 7 years and.... well.... maybe he had a really really good lawyer? I'm kinda shocked now. Jeez. I would also like to know!

@@nyxspiritsong5557 my apologies, I commented too early and wrong. You're actually right.

Thank you ! As someone who is always working week-end i genuinely apreciate your words 😊 Hooe you re having a nice week-end too !

Love ya❤️

Hope you have a good weekend too!

To me the weekend means work, thanks fam

Biddy well lads. The lot of ya.

Only if you hire one three times a year or more.

You could finance a hitman with monthly payments for 24 months. If your credit score’s been in good standing for awhile the interest rate shouldn’t be too bad.

That didnt happen in the video unless you mean the killer for hire instead of target

What was that girl, Ohhh Dalia Dipilito or whatever. They did that to her. It’s the best thing I’ve ever seen.

@@krystal2157 I thought about Dalia right away, too. I'll also never forget her cringeworthy fake wailing at hearing of Mike's "death" - I can hear it in my head, still, lol.

@@EYE_GOTCHA oh man, and BEFORE the cops even finished saying what happened. It was unbearable, lmao

I agree her wailing Mikes name and ordering him to come here, come here..over and over. Most cringe inducing ever!!!!

Along with the family braincell.

Indeed 😂

It was the Tasty Freeze where I grew up. "Meet me behind the Tasty Freeze " was the challenge. 😃

@@thegreencat9947 So, "Meet my behind the Tasty Freeze" is a challenge to a fight? Up here in Canada, we say "meet me in the parking lot." Is that the same?

@@THE_CDN when you're a kid it's the Tasty Freeze.....grown up...it's the parking lot...probably of the bar.😂😉

@@THE_CDN I'm guessing you don't know much about america lol.

That's great!! So true 😅

@Marty's 4x4 I feel like him overdoing it was what made it good. Anyone this careless would talk and think just as carelessly imo

Prefer no jail time. Thank you

the sad thing is there are people that have

It's so funny.

lol I'm gen Z and I cringe to think about us as elders, "back in my day on the internet during the pandemic" stories 😭

can’t you tho like on the dark web 💀

I TEALLY wanted the target to walk in as the reveal - the one they thought they killed lol.

@@anti-ethniccleansing465 that's happened before on this channel

I kept hoping lol 😆

@@anti-ethniccleansing465 I REDDY wanted that too.

@@beckiehubley5798 Nobody’s perfect. :P

Which story is that?

@@zaya9365 I'm not sure of the one Dark is referring to, but there was one here I'm China very similar to that which was instigated by a. businessman. You can find it by looking for "China Guangxi Murder for hire hitman"

Oh my gods! That sounds like a plot to a dark comedy. It’s so stupid it should not be true….proof life is often stranger than fiction.

And each new time the payment amount was lowered and lowered.

​@Zaya I can't remember exactly, but Mike covered it in one of his hitmand-run videos.

Haha yeah caught that in the video. Almost spat my coffee out

tried to go to the site, my malware program reported a trojan virus on the site.....

@@malachycarson5846 I had no issues but better safe than sorry.....

I just checked it out too. Funny shit

@@ronjames4151 Haha funniest is the satisfied customer quotes. 😂

Lol

😁

Bwhahaha. I was gonna post the same thing but you got here first!

Glad someone else caught that. Cased Closed! Lol

U took me out😂😂😂😂

🙌🏾

We're always down for givin' it a goo!

Like, ohnmygod! Like, arrested for real?

Cringe factor x 10!

The handcuffs should have tipped her off that she was arrested. Mind you, she doesn't seem to be the sharpest tool in the shed!

LMFAO!!!!

@@pazza4555 j09

Let's hope he'll interpret what happened as proof of how much his dad loved him and wanted him in his life, just as his mom did. Wishful thinking? Perhaps, but to feel completely loved by both parents despite their issues, that would be my hope for him.

@@susanivy3619 ew WTF r u saying

@@susanivy3619 I'd imagine it more like one parent was so selfish that they were ok with their child grieving over a lost parent. But hey, I'm a pessimist.

That is the first thing that occurred to me but these people a so selfish they only think of themselves...very short sighted with a sense of self entitlement. Narcissistic personality disorder.

Custody battles is war and war has casualties.

Thanks Alexander!

Same with me and my husband...

Dude, same! I honestly think my husband is a hater lol hes never "given it a go" he calls Mike "Milhouse" from the simpsons 😂

I say your girlfriend is weird... LoL jk 😁

You say weirdo like it's a bad thing. I say let that freak flag fly! Also encourage your girlfriend to let her freak flag fly because if you're a weirdo, and Mike's a weirdo, well I think she might have a thing for weirdos. Maybe she's a closeted weirdo! Tell her to come join our club. we have jackets! 🤣🤣🤪🤪😉💛

I would almost feel bad for the people stupid enough to believe that website wasn’t a clear parody... if they didn’t followup & actually wanted to have someone dead

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

That’s funny!

Stupidty is like the everready bunny it goes on and on. Never stops no breaks and never sleeps.

@@williamchasel998 energizer bunny? Lol

So sorry for your loss!

Sorry for your loss, Nick.

Condolences.

So sorry to hear that, Nick. I hope you're OK. I know what a beast grief is. Sending lots of love....

😂😂

Lmaoooo🤣 Me too! I’m a terrible liar.. that why I’m just known for being too honest sometimes, when I should’ve kept my mouth shut lol

The audacity!!! Their just so damn stupid

@Marty's 4x4 depends on what the leftovers are. Leftover chilli, win... Leftover clam chowder.... not so much

Those must have been some amazing left overs !!!

do him

There is no such thing as too much of that chapter.

Mike mentioned in his last episode he may be scaling back to once @ wk. but it's not a sure thing, just a heads up because he's got other things on the goo. 💓

@@isabellind1292 I know, it was such a happy surprise to see him on Friday. He can do no wrong in my experience and I look forward to his experiments. I kind of miss tin foil hat Mike.

@@crankyoldperson6871 I think they're called UAV Jammers where he lives.💓(Sounds more technologically advanced, lol)! I hope you have a pleasant day cranky old person!😊🌺

I just love the change of pace, but still has the feel we're all used to and can't get enough of.

This. I was howling with laughter 😃

Oh hell yes, and I know we haven’t heard of them all👍🏻✌🏻

Mike has the receipts.

@@chrisw6164 he is spilling the tea! Lmao

🤣🤣😂

What he wanted was for a strange man to walk up to his ex and shake his finger at her in shame! That certainly would have made her give up her children.

Murder for hire? Nooo I just wanted him to roast her with Joe mama jokes, your honor. Ongaongad

@@SundayMourningLove for sure! 😂 I love that he has to read lips 😂 if I were feeling better I would come up with a witty comment right now.

Yea forreal that should be a red flag for example the one who said he needed a 500 up front an 1500 after it’s done

I guess you haven’t been to Miami?

@@TheLolapuff I haven't been past Boston Mass. Very full life...and I live in east Boston.sad

That’s because they are not really going through with it and they don’t want to charge too much because they might go off and find an idiot willing to do it for much less

You'd be surprised how much people get wacked for. Can't say much online, but the amount described is pretty median for the job. Life is not valued as highly as you think it is

As a nurse too 😂😂😂

I thought they would have applied makeup on the target and taken a photo. Nope she just closed her eyes and they 'shopped some blood on lol

@@sblinder1978 Maybe they used raspberry jam from the diary queen lol

Came to say this, that picture was soooooo bad! It looks more like an edgy picture you'd see on MySpace back in the day.

I somewhat disagree. he talked like a guy from the streets, but he seemed really nervous to me. his nervousness would made me suspicious.

Do you know many hit men?

Most “hit men” are junkies

I feel like he played the ex-con role super well. At an old job, I worked with a guy who did time in San Quentin for drug charges and he explained why ex-prisoners are so nervous dealing with people. In my opinion, based on that, he was believable.

@@johnv6806 Shit probably 🤣🤣🤣 I’m from a really rough neighborhood so I’m pretty good at knowing the real from the fake IJS

😭😭

Maybe they’re on a special sale.😂

Bruh, I know right? They're the same people that basically think the second page on Google is the Dark Web

When I saw the photos I was like omg this is so funny, it’s a whole new level of stupid I’ve never even heard of

They have a senior discount!

I paused the video to read and was cracking up, 'Thanks Guido!' LOLOLOL

I'm addicted to pigger nussy 🤠

I'm wondering how the elaborate schemes are justified, as if the police had nothing more worthwhile to do than stage assassination photo shoots? But I guess it probably gives them some satisfaction in their job.

@Sydney Young It isn't done for fun... It is done to solidify convictions. Showing the offender a photo of the target who is "deceased" while they're being recorded is great evidence. After that happens, it is almost impossible to claim they didn't mean to have them killed. Start looking through the lens of evidence, facts, and legal strategies, and things will make more sense. Conspiracy to commit first degree murder is extremely serious... Let us know what's more worthwhile than homicide detectives gathering evidence of a would-be murder... They probably do get a lot of satisfaction from it, but it has nothing to do with playing dress up. They're putting murderous assholes in prison.

I'm blown away how far the American police go to pretending and acting out that a crime occured.

@@sydneyyoung7352 well those schemes saved a women's life so...

@@sydneyyoung7352 you must not understand how convicting someone works.

Don’t say that 😂

Knowing is half the battle, my brilliant brethren.

I think folks like this help us have a better gauge on ourselves 💖 You are more awesome than you know, our kind tends to just make a few more missteps.

I feel you here, I say that all the time. like 'Damn I'm dumb as shit but I wouldn't fall for this nonsense' lmao

@@bees.857 Exactly, I might make many dumb mistakes, but not that dumb. The foot doctor is smarter than me, but probably thinks he's too smart to get caught. I know I'm not smart enough to get away with something like that (not saying I ever wanted to).

I had to restart the video because I was so distracted by it and completely ignored what Mike was saying 😅 It's fucking awesome!

That shirt ❤️❤️LOVE IT!! Color looks good on him. Had to restart video.

@@jeffthompson3379 glad I wasn’t the only one who restarted video, Mike always makes me smile 😊

@@jeffthompson3379 You know what, me too!!! Truth! I love that shirt!!!

I love the shirt!! I don’t really conform to following what fashion dictates, I like what I like and I don’t like being told what to do 🤣

I'm glad you're experimenting with a different shirt. I'm here for that as well.

It's kinda like a return, when he used to cover max headroom and such. But with better production value like it was with the individual cases

what a sweet comment. im glad you were happy to see her. i hope you have fond memories of working with her and have many blessings in life.

@@aristobrat4987 Thank you, Aristobrat! Seeing Michelle brought back a rush of memories and senses (the elegant interior of the old courthouse; its bouquet - leather, mature lacquered wood, and time which, together, smelled like the interior of a BMW of all things; the soft murmuring of the crowd of lawyers, court deputies and clerks talking shop and gossiping while we waited for the Judge to enter the courtroom to kick off the show; and, finally, the adrenaline rush when you were suddenly called to trial). Seeing Michelle brought all that back: There I was again, sitting there joking with Michelle and Mark; listening to defense lawyers pitch their deals; regretting my staying out so late the night before.

This might be the nicest comment I’ve ever seen on RU-vid, what a kind soul ☺️

Wow... that's crazy 😳😂

*Mike's insurance Dance music abruptly stops*

Glad ur still with us. It would be difficult to watch Mike if u weren't!

We should all just get life insurance on each other at this point. It can be like a lottery pool.

That sounds like a really creepy request!!! 😳

Appreciate you watching!

I dig that shirt 👍🏾👍🏽👍🏿💖🎭☯️

@@francesglenn2117 same! It looked cool against the backdrop as well.

And neither should the "Dunning-Kruger effect"!

“Two things are infinite, as far as we know - the universe and human stupidity.” -Unknown(but often attributed to Einstein in err).

@Otis B. Driftwood Should we be alarmed if the GOP rebrands themselves as the SSNBU?

@Otis B. Driftwood Hiya, the GOP is the Republican Party of the United States. It's very right wing and want to impose fascist and/or theocratic rule. The SSNBU refers to Mike's comment: Stupidity Should Never Be Underestimated. So I was saying that the Republican Party could easily rebrand themselves with that acromyn! :)

@Otis B. Driftwood There are many aspects of socialism that work very well. Not all, but many.

I'm confused - he was telling the truth when he said that. Usually the guilty party would say the victim and them were friends and had no issues, which their friends will say wasn't true. He was very smart for telling the truth about that.

Took me off guard as well, but I think that would’ve gotten out anyway (said to friends and family). I think he was being as honest as he could be because he has a solid alibi.

No. That was actually genius on his part. An innocent person will usually cop to hating the victim, where’s guilty people will pretend like they loved them even when all the evidence points to the contrary….

Weird comment - the part that you're saying made him a terrible liar was actually literally the only time he was telling the truth 🤣

🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

Nice to see you again Mike, I look forward to your stories!

sarcasm

So true, a bit of animation, hand waving, and expletives goes a long way towards believability.

I was thinking the same! Good actor for sure. Right person for the job.

It legitimately sounds like someone who's proud of what they've done and riding the adrenaline rush of having done something risky.

ii thought the same thing . he was so believable

Thank you!

Mike’s videos are like Pringle’s. One you start, you just can’t stop! 🤪💗

😂

🤣😂🤣😂💀💀

😂

Pahahaaaaaa! Literally THAT!

Yes! I love you, too, Mike!

I'm old but I'd give it a goo!

Only Mike can look that cute in a shirt that dorky LOL

His girlfriend! Lool

ditto!!!

That Polaroid shirt is so, so good. He’s absolutely fantastic :)

Yeah the "hitman" even gives them an out to back out of the idea before it being final.

@@pepcore it just goes to show, if you want something done right, you’ll have to do it yourself.

that's because they think killing is the right choice..

Yes! It's their depraved indifference and malicious intent over a lengthy period of time. Then they demonstrate zero integrity and claim it was all a misunderstanding. "I'm 5000% sure." Dalia Dippolito

i completely agree - in younger perpetrators, mental illness combined with immaturity make it easier to feel a hint of sympathy. but these adults are simply monsters

Mike has been doing this since the beginning of time. 😂

Mike has been here for yrs ☘💯🥰..but if you like Mike you might also like alot newer yt channel literally called Dumb Criminal..he literally calls out dumb Criminals or DC's & he's funny ..different but funny!..you should check him out he could do with some new subscribers!..but yh check out his backlog..he's had me cracking up at times..👍🤣😅..

We had a bilateral leg amputee, cat burglar in my town. On his third appearance in magistrates court, the Chair of The Bench advised him to find a line of work more suited to his abilities. 😐

It’s definitely his niche. He’s been doing it for a while and he’s a great at it.

I firmly believe in this as a toast "May all your enemies be stupid,"

Hubby and I agree. We dance through intro music and both say "love you too mike" at the end. Not as creepy as it sounds, Mike is an important part of our relationship.😉

Same!

Sounds psychotic

SAME! And he rarely has sponsors

Life insurance dance, Polaroid shirt, smart

I read this right as he said it and it’s killing meeee hahah (not really tho since my family didn’t hire a HIPPA compliant Rent-a-hitman) 😅

Exactly!!!

Lol

But if he was innocent it actually would not prove anything he’s admitting that he hates her doesn’t mean he did it

if my ex was beating my kid id want her dead too. he shouldnt even be in trouble

I'm not sure if you understand the laws of physics.... besides the imaginary bullet impacting the skull and traveling through brain matter, physics has nothing to do with it.

@Cassandra whoosh, with a little 💩 at the end. Beat that b!tc#. Oh yeah, and ya mommas bug stinks. Sorry, I know that is not your fault, but I just thought you should know. Let's hope they cut you out and you didn't have to pass through that valley of death. Although, that would explain the stench. Maybe they have some sort of topical ointment that will help you out. Anyway, it has been good chatting as always, sis. I hope you and uncle jed are still hanging in there, no matter what anyone says. Love is love. Keep the rubber side down and the pedal to the metal. That's a big 10-4 from Saskatchewan, over and out YEEEHAWW!!

Florida is literally full of some of the most wealthy in the world . Shows how poor you are😂 if you’ve been to Florida, any part of Florida, you’d know that’s true. Central florida is really the only average American towns, but that’s not much of the state.

FL people are just unhinged enough to do it themselves

@@michaelmorgan9601 dude….you seriously let a low effort Florida joke rankle you?🤦‍♀️ Seek help. (Side note ; it’s called hyperbole.)

@@glorygloryholeallelujah You’re a bad joke teller. Seek help.

@@anhingasnakebird9947 good thing that’s not for you to decide, Princess. 😉

Will keep you and your family in my prayers

Can’t believe I had to scroll down this far to see this comment! Not only did he break out of his normal shirt rotation, it looks absolutely fantastic! 😍

So. Many. People. Go watch Barely Sociable's video on Besa Mafia, it's really astounding how many people tried to do just that.

Bc its actually possible ...

The desperate, deluded and the gullible.

"This must be that there Dark Web!"--an idiot, probably

I went into a predominantly white and well off area today. Porsche parked where they WANTED. And the way that middle aged women drive and act with their pets. Daring ANYONE to speak to them. And the overpriced pet store that was full of entitled people with good jobs that keep them away from their pets all week. Gotta spend $12.99 on some decorated dog safe cookies🙄. Not to say all upper class people r entitled, act entitled, or think they r above the law. But it's a stereotype that I would love to be proven wrong about.

@@JNMKlover yep, I live in an area like that and fully agree with you.

Well said 🥂

@@Queen_Kellz_1120 Thank you 🥂

@@angelatkeller anytime 🥂

Former Floridian here. Not only is your comment funny as hell, but is true!

@sarah Albers I thought when you started with former Floridian here that you were gonna be offended lmao...loved your comment!

😂

That’s what I was thinking when he said that 😂… they probably don’t have to hire anyone

Hahahahah I sooo agree!

When she laughs she sounded like a dolphin

But you’re not buying anything