no it isn't the writers made Gary too big of an asshole. Like is he completely unaware he married out of his league. Brooke is hot, smart and ambitious. If he listened and bought the fucking 12 lemons and helped his wife wash the dishes which seems pretty straightforward after co-hosting a dinner party he'd probably be having sex tonight with his hot wife instead of arguing with her like a fucking clown. And honestly is it a white people thing to wear shoes in the home all the time unless there in the bed. Like fuck I'm a man and I think it is wack he is putting his feet up on the sofa with his dirty shoes still on.
I hate the “I go to work every day for you” line. Like, most people go to work. Because they need money. She ALSO works, but doesn’t need to be thanked for it. It’s like being congratulated for meeting a basic requirement. life is work.
Never been a more real scene in any movie. It’s too bad people can’t see a movie like this and realize how important it is to see things from others perspective.
I mean for real the writing in this movie was fucking superb. It was exactly what it’s like when two people who genuinely love each other start to drift it’s heart wrenching and earnest. Really underrated movie.
I was too young and not as matured to fully digest this movie and its message, after watching these clips and life kicking me in the groin a few times.. it makes way more sense as to how compatibility is more than the physical and certain love languages are real. powerful scene
It’s about effort people simple as that . She’s putting forth way more effort than he .He gets defensive and only talks about himself . She doesn’t know how to get her words across the right way and he gets an attitude w it immediately . Terrible communication on both parts but at least she had the guts to confront him in a calm way at first . I can see her frustration as he continues to dismiss her concerns
honestly I'm a man and I think Gary is a total prick in this movie. He doesn't give a shit about what Brooke likes, cares or dreams about till the very end of the film when it is basically implied they broke up, moved on but remained acquaintances. To my knowledge they were never married and lmfao I find it hard to believe if he ever proposed without cleaning his act she would ever say yes.
@@TaillessSwagger share of the work she did fucking everything and she has a job and makes money. His shot about her not having to work some day seemed to be a subtle hint he expects them to be married with kids someday in the future and assumes she will be a housewife. Fact is he is so thick he doesn't understand she loves her job more than he loves his.
You ever seen that movie He's Just Not That Into You? Some scenes in there made me and my girlfriend fight for a week about what we would do in those situations. Stupid shit really lol.
this argument scene is so much better than the one in that movie marriage story. this one just feels so much more real than whatever that other drivel was about.
I really enjoyed this movie because of the powerful subtext. I've read some of the comments and people seem to be taking their fight too literal. The issue ( imho) is not about the dishes or that he's being selfish... these are two people who are missmatched... her asking " I want you to want to do the dishes." Isn't literal it's her saying " show me that you value me as the person you love." Because if he truly did he would know " I'm not going to let my girlfriend clean up all by herself she entertained our friends let me help her out because I love her." But also, I see some women blame Vince's character completely for their relationship ending and that's not fair either. She kept trying to make him into something that he wasn't. I remember reading this article about choosing your mate and it send date the person they are and not what you think they can be... She was holding onto a relationship full of hope of who he could be... and she wasn't truly happy with whom she had which is why she constantly nagged at him. I think that happens so much in real life that it's scary. Being in relationships that are unhealthy or lack a true foundation of love for one another.
He has his preconceived notion of what she wants. He isn't really hearing what she wants. He is projecting. On the other hand the first way to get a guy to shut down is to start yelling at him.
I learned this lesson the hard way. Never stay in a relationship due to potential. It will eat you alive and will frustrate the heck out of you. Walking away saves a lot of time and aggravation
It has nothing to do with two people being mismatched. Relationships can be messy, and very rarely in the heat of the moment do we have the proper perspective to see it's not about the dishes, or the ballet, or the lemons. Relationships are about compromise. She saw it, he didn't. The bar scene with Jon Favreau after the break-up nutshells it. And the song at the very end says it all, "I can see clearly now..." This is a movie about perspective, the lack of it in a relationship and the perspective gained outside of one.
Yep. But the roles were reversed for me. My ex girlfriend now always and I mean ALWAYS wanted to be on her goddamn xbox. It's like she can't go a fucking day without being on it. And when she was on it, she was on almost 6 hours Monday-Friday and then almost all fucking day Saturday and Sunday. She never once did the dishes or vaccuum or even did her goddamn laundry except when it suited her. I'm OCD and I can't stand to have dirty dishes just sitting in the sink or for their to be random trash everywhere and random clothes all over the bedroom floor. The bedroom we had divided and you couldn't even see the floor on her half because their was such random crap all over it. And going back to her goddamn xbox, she wasn't playing a game like Spyro or Mario or some bullshit. She was playing Neverwinter. An online game and talking to other guys that she said were just other people playing the game. But she'd rather spend more time talking to them and playing that goddamn game than spend any of that time with me. Bitch. I didn't ask much from her, but apparently that was too much. I've been single for almost 2 months because I just couldn't handle her bullshit anymore. Sorry. Rant over.
This isn't about lemons. This isn't about dishes. This is about her wanting a partner who cares enough about her to 1) listen to what she asks for and delivers; 2) want to do things with her and for her that make her happy, like occasionally going to the ballet, and doing the dishes and cleaning the house for guests; and 3) choosing to do things for her, even if or when they're inconvenient, instead of always choosing to do what he wants to do. She wants a man who recognizes what needs to be done and has the initiative and self-discipline to do it, not act like a child or an unmotivated worker, waiting to be asked or told to do it. He just seems to want to do want he wants to do, when he wants to do it, and not be bothered or inconvenienced by her or her desires. He seems to think that just going to work is all he should be required to do, to be considered a good partner -- as if there isn't much more to a relationship and running a household. In essence, he wants to put forth minimal effort; both here and at work (the log books his brother is always asking him to do). The problem is, she's not a "minimal effort" woman. A woman that looks that good and is that successful requires (of herself and her partner) much more than "minimal effort". THAT's why they're not a good match.
@@1blackone She wants a partner not an employee. An equal with the same interests and eagerness to build a life they can share. Even as an employee he's crappy as he doesn't do what he's asked and gives an attitude. He doesn't meet her needs as a partner and is essentially a man child.
I really like that last paragraph. She's a high powered woman. There's nothing objectively wrong with either one of them, they're just too different. He could be the perfect match for a different type of woman, and she could be happy with a different type of man.
I hope this scenes helps some men understand that their wives are not their mothers. That they are not kids anymore and should not expect anyone to have to pick up after them. That means doing the damn dishes.
I can definitely relate to alot of these scenes in this movie lol. However, I never had a problem doing dishes I'd be like "alright fuck it let me turn this Pandora on and let's get it over with..."
Actually she's the one being selfish because she is trying to force him to want to do something even though he already said he would do the dishes. That's one of the main problems with women when it comes to relationships. They always try to force you to have emotions that you haven't even thought about yet instead of letting it just happen. A woman will ask some dumb shit like "did you miss me?" or "do you love me?" and expect him to give the correct answer right on the spot. GTFOH
Lord Lyons - The God of Feminist Destruction it's not like that, it's more like, we want you to think about us and be like "oh she's been working hard all day, I should do something nice for her, give her a little break"
LordLyons how is she being selfish when its always up to her to do everything. She also works and comes home to clean up after him and cooks for him and a bunch of guest and he comes home from work and goes straight to the couch to play video games and when she simply asked him to get 12 lemons for her he only brings 3 back and since she did do everything it wouldn't have killed him to simply just do the dishes since he didn't do anything else he literally wasn't giving a crap what she wanted unless he wanted it himself. Yes she is wasting her time trying to change him bc you can't force no one to change for you but he could have pitched in more with the relationship sometimes in a relationship you have to also do things you don't want to do as well bc you care about your partner enough to do it anyways. Thats why the relationship failed bc he put himself before her always.
It’s about helping your partner without being told, buying them gifts without being asked and going to places they’d like that you might not enjoy. I’ve done all that too but the other partner didn’t reciprocate either.
He is being selfish. You cannot be selfish and expect a relationship to survive. Both the man and woman have to be willing to make compromise in order to make it work. There is no "I" in team.
@@coreenforcer6404 Cause he's doesn't listen to her. He is unappreciative and likes to play the victim so that he can get away with doing whatever he wants
Maybe if she wasn't behind his ass and gave him just 20 minutes to unwind like he wanted he would have done it. Nagging is a real problem with women to the point that they make their man not want to even see her face or hear her voice.
He should have helped first, then relaxed... then she wouldn't have to annoy him. Surely he isnt that exhausted that he cant stand up or bare the stress for 15 minutes before he 'relaxes'. Poor didums.
@@scotthogan1374 Most of the time "I'll do these later" turn into dishes she'd have to do in the morning. Did she get time to unwind? No, she busted her ass, the least he could fucking do is wash the damn dishes. Also, just to clarify, this isn't even what the fight was about. This was the final straw for her. He's a shitty BF who refuses to listen to what she's asking for, thinks he knows what she's looking for in life, and she's a shit communicator.
He’s acting like a fool. She cooked him a meal and he can’t compromise or even be kind and just offer to help and do the dishes? People like this think they can put in the bare minimum to a relationship and then cry and complain when their partner understandably wants a little more effort.
lol my wife loves this part, when we first met she told me that she also didn't like flowers one day I got her some and she was so happy, I thought she would be like wtvr about them.....lol girls are so weird.
You miss the subtext. It's not about the stupid flowers; it's the fact that you, the one she loves, bothered to think of her. It's the meaning behind it.
just remember every girl loves flowers lol. The ones who say they hate them probably still like getting them infront of an audience like co-workers or friends. Like all those scenes you see of guys sending flowers to their woman at the office with a card and I don't just mean on their birthday or Valentine's day. Lmfao from personal experience it is a pretty worthwhile strategy to get laid especially when you are exhausted with your kids' shenanigans.
@@ajallen9674 "bothered to think about her". That's the most dumbest fucking comment I've read all day. This is why you females don't get taken seriously.
My favourite actress in the whole world! I’ve been watching friends non stop for the last couple of weeks! I’m on series 9 now..! Really wish they’d do a proper reunion series! Imagine Rachel and Ross being parents to an adult Emma!!.
It’s clear she is not talking about the dishes, the lemons, flowers or ballet. What she means by “I want you to want” is that asking someone to love and appreciate you is false, she shouldn’t have to ask that, he should WANT to love and appreciate her. When there is shit jobs to do or someone is tired or burnt out, you should want to help because you love them, you shouldn’t have to be asked. He doesn’t need to work to support her, she wants to work, so he is using it as an excuse, his not bringing anything to the table that she isn’t too. Why can’t men just be loving?
He hates the ballet because its a bunch of men in tights flopping around for 3 hours.... But he likes football.... men in tights flopping around chasing eachother for 3 hours Men, take your woman to ballet
the most realistic fight in relationship n the reason I'm getting divorced. her needs werent being met. he did what he thought was needed not what she wanted him to. its important to communicate your needs in relationships. n get the fuck out once the person has no intention of meeting them
I told my ex I didn't like flowers so he never brought me flowers. One day I told him: you never gave me flowers and he said this exact thing. I realize that I want him to want to give me flowers because I do like them but not as a rule... is confuse I know but it is like this fight, we just want our partner to want to do things thinking in our good.
I don't like flowers but my husband still gets them for me. We'll just be leaving the grocery store and he'll say "oh I forgot something, be right back" and he'll buy a cute little orchid and bring it to me. He's such a sweetheart.
I rmb watching this scene when I was a kid & i didn’t really understand it, but now that I’m older and married I feel for her because this is exactly how my marriage is right now 😔 I’m always going everywhere alone with my daughter
THIS is where you tell her that she looks lovely. She worked hard all day. She needs to go to bed. You’re going to relax for a little bit and then you will do all of the dishes and clean up the kitchen. That is a win-win.
My wife and I have referenced this scene countless times throughout our marriage. You can find the message in other place, like the Scriptures, for example, but this is an incredibly illustrative and contemporary example.
It’s not about that. It’s about that he never shows that he cares about her. He never puts effort in and never does anything she wants. The only thing that matters to him is himself. She’s not being difficult. She just wants him to show he cares.
@@mr-vb3id What is she wanting that's the opposite? You must be terrible in relationships. She said she wants him to do things she ask and even better do something without her asking. He should want to make her happy. If I work, cooked dinner, and cleaned the house it's just basic common courtesy to help out. It's to show you care. If your friend always gives you rides, but you don't give them same back he's just being taken advantage of. She's putting in effort to show she loves him, but he won't even spend 5 minutes to help her out. I'd run away from that relationship as quickly as I could.
A the dishes, dishwasher the savor of relationships. But also Keep changing the argument, is the dishes, then the lemons,then flowers caught in lie then the ballet, then going out.
I actually have the issue of wanting to do housework and being told NOT to(only because my wife wants our kids to do some. They do have their chores and stuff, but i habitually do some work because i dont want my wife to worry about it 😊). I use the time when she and the kids go to sleep, to then spend 2-3 hours playing Xbox/Switch. And sometimes i just chill on my phone. And 80% of nights at home, as soon as she sits on the couch, i rub her feet and put pain cream on them to help her relax 😌
