Each time I have helped someone do this, despite creating a home for everything and using organizing systems in each dresser/closet/cabinet, within a week it was back to the original state. Dishes, trash, food, clothes on the floor, etc all over the place. Their internal chaos manifested in their external environment. We have to parent ourselves, If our parent didn't teach us to develop self control and discipline, we must teach ourselves. Maintaining a tidy space requires a change in daily habits and a radical mindshift. Self care is a sign that you believe you deserve to live in orderly space.
Yes, this! You can clear out their homes, but as long as they don't address the issues why this happens and bring changes to their lives and routines, this will keep happening. I know, because I was one of them, until I decided to change it.
Exactly, I helped a neighbor clean their home bc a case worker was coming. It was 10x worse than this. They had roaches everywhere in the fridge and sink just crawling around. I came over about a week later and was soo disappointed with what i saw knowing that I put in an entire day to clean their home. Ugh :/ Not all our homes are going to be perfectly clean and organized. I know mine isn’t and I have chronic pain & It’s one thing when it’s “lived in” another when it’s just filled with trash. They gotta change their bad habits or nothing will ever change.
So many know-it-all comments. They have no idea what they're talking about. Clutter is often not a hoarding issue nor from laziness or lack of organization skills lol. Stress, depression, anxiety, other mood disorders, CPTSD, ADD/ADHD, autism, etc, cause so much mental chaos and overload it's next to impossible to tackle long-term clutter build up. It becomes a vicious cycle with clutter further overwhelming and defeating one's efforts.
I guarantee most folks with ADD or ADHD also have poor diets. It all starts with what we put in our bodies. Drs are so quick to just prescribe pills which only mask the problem.
1. Clear Out - focus one room at a time. Clear out everything that does Not belong in that room, take out trash, and move to other room to deal with later so its clear to see! 2. Categorise - This allows you to see everything you own helping to prep you for next step. 3. Cut Out - Easily declutter and make decisions. 4. Contain - Assess all items and storage and give necessary items a home. 5. ...and RELAX! 💪😁
My mom never taught me to clean. At all. Either she would clean my room or she would have our maid do it. She taught me to keep everything I didn’t want in boxes in storage and would get mad if I didn’t want something anymore. As an adult, I literally look at my borderline messy room and feel overwhelmed, not knowing how to tackle it. I get the dishes and garbage out, wash the laundry, put things where they belong, but then I get stuck. I get to a phase with a bunch of random stuff that doesn’t have a space, or I don’t know if I should keep, like a slightly damaged printed photograph or random sewing supplies from my late grandma or an organizer I don’t currently have a use for or especially delicate craft projects I am actively working on/in the middle of. Once those items are all that is left, I get stressed out and don’t know what to do other than “hide” them by putting them in a drawer or box they don’t really belong in or leaving them on the floor by my bed. My point is, as silly as it seems, some people really do have a lack of skills and know-how to do basic tasks that most school age children can do independently. Hoarding, mental illness, and physical disabilities is not necessarily evident from a messy room alone. As someone who desperately wants a clean room and is actively trying, it’s still hard for me
Same, my sis and I share a room, (my apartment only has 1 bedroom) and she completely trashes it. yea, she’s still a kid, yes she has some mental problems, but she doesn’t help at all. With anything. all thanks to my mom.. i try teaching her but my moms like “im the parent and i tell her what to do not you!” It’s so annoying. and srry about ur mom, it’s very wrong of her not to teach you that.
My mom didn’t teach us how to clean either, but I’m not sure if she ever learned how either. She said her house was clean growing up, but when I was 3 my great grandmother died and My grandmother became a hoarder. I don’t remember what our house was like before I was six and my mom started working full time in addition to participating in many activities, but our house was usually messy. She did the dishes almost every night, but we didn’t clean the house unless company was coming. When I was the last kid left at home, we moved to a different state and larger home. It was nice and we had get togethers frequently, until my grandparents passed away. My mom started cleaning out my grandmothers house and filled my parents home. I’ve learned to keep the house clean, from different people over the years, except for my bedroom. However, I haven’t given up and I hope you don’t either. RU-vid has helped immensely. ❤
You are such an Angel. A lot of times people struggle with this and people blame them. A lot of time they have disabilities and can’t clean or they have mental issues or other reasons. And you don’t make them feel bad! We need more cleaning channels like you.
Within 3-1/2 years, I moved to 5 states: TX AL FL CA LA. I just gave my notice this week. I only keep my favorites, and I get rid of everything that can replaced for less than $20 or within 20 Minutes at Amazon. If I have 2 of anything, I get rid of the larger items, bec I only keep what fits in my 12 large Totes: 1 Art supplies 2 Bathroom/Laundry 3 Blankets, Pillows 4 Cat food litter toy 5 Clothes Fall, Winter, 6 & Spring, Summer 7 Cooking, Appliances 8 Dine, Place Settings 9 Docs, Books, Pics 10 Office/Study 11 Pantry 12 Work Tools
Ive been thinking about this what you said about the 12 tubs. I think I am going to have a mental tub Like envision the size of one in my mind and toss out everything that doesn’t fit in a tub. So should I ever need a tub it’s already done. Thanks for this idea .
I cleaned my room for the first time in forever. Yes I’m messy. There is often and underlying cause. Mine is depression. Wellbutrin has helped me tackle my messes.
This video almost brought me to tears. After having had a baby and now she’s currently a 2 year old. I crave organization. Before having a kids I was so organized. I even had my clothes color coded organized. Now it’s just like whatever I am done! 😢
I totally understand. I was so organized before I had my children. They are so precious to me but they both have special needs. I’m so tired and overwhelmed and things are in chaos. I feel your pain. You are not alone. ❤
I'm not a parent, so I can't directly relate, but I can relate to struggling with clutter. (I'm also a Christin, hi name twin!) I've been watching a decluttering channel by a woman - her name is Robyn - who is both a wife and a mother and it's been helping me. If you'd like to check out her channel, it's called "Minimalist Home" (they're not extreme minimalists, rather they apply some minimalist techniques to keep their home clutter-free/less cluttered). That channel, along with other RU-vidrs/videos, is helping me sort through all of my childhood stuff and clutter in my bedroom before I eventually move onto decluttering my college stuff. I hope this helps! 🧡
It is hard with kids. I watch some decluttering channels on here that are helpful to me as background noise motivation when I am cleaning etc. Minimal mom, Clutterbug. Some random others. This is just a phase. Just try to spend time with your baby and don't waste time managing things in your home that isn't going to matter in years from now. Set aside like 5 minutes and do what you can. In this day and time we have TOO MUCH stuff and too much to manage. Praying for you.
The outside is just a reflection of the inside. I use to be a bit more punctual and definitely more organized b4 having my babies. Not the best but better at keeping things tidy longer and showing up for things on time. When we become parents, that’s when our balancing skills are tested to the max lol. And when one thing is out of whack, it’s easy to lay something down and say “I’ll get it later”. Then when the clutter forms, you feel like you’ll never get it done, it’s too much, you may feel like a failure and eventually what’s the use! Hang in there mama. Seek help if you need to or just take baby steps. Just like how you taught your little one how to walk. Take baby steps. Do one percent better tomorrow than you did today and it’ll add up over time. May I suggest the book called “Atomic Habits” by James Clear: it could really help us moms out! It really opened my eyes after the first read. I’m going to read it again to stay sharp. It’s also on RU-vid if you’d prefer the Audio. Good job Mama!
Thank you so much for this, I am on my own cleaning journey and getting very overwhelmed with the spaces I need to clean. So much of the content online around decluttering shows instagram perfect households that are just organising a single cupboard that's already 10,000x more functional than my spaces before they even start with their privileged minimalist decluttering. This video really helped me to remind myself that it's okay to just box up my "relocate" tubs, put them in the room they belong and deal with it another day, stay focused on the area we're actually working on. It's hard not to worry about "what if I finish organising the bedroom, and then when I go to organise the lounge room I find boxes of things that belong in the bedroom, and I have to organise the bedroom all over again! I'm exhausted, I give up". Reminding myself that my house is a living space and it will grow and change and need maintenance along with me, and it's one day at a time.
My issue is a bad back and knees. Most of the cleaning requires stopping, bending, or getting on my knees. Like to clean the bathtub or under my bed. Or as in mopping floors and base boards . No money to pay someone, can’t do it on my own….no fam or friend to help. What do I do?
When my boys were little, all 4 shared one room! It always was trashed. ☹️ Untill one day G❤️D inspired me! I turned on some music, grabbed a bunch of plastic grocery bags; told the boys to put all SHOES in one set of bags, CLOTHES-clean or dirty- in another, BOOKS/papers/pens pencils -etc in another, TOYS in another. That was it. In 15 minutes the room cleared! Then we were able to clean in peace. Later on we sat quietly and sorted through everything in peace. WE CONTROLLED IT ALL, thank G🔥D we were not controlled by it!!!! Have fun!!!
I used a different method. I told my daughter I will leave and when I get back anything that is on the floor or not put away I will put in the trash. And I did with a big black trashbag. All it took is once 😊
I'm currently trying my own mess. I think I basically follow your 4 steps (even though this is the first time I see them), but I do step 1 and 2 simultaneously. How do you manage to find the trash and what belongs in different rooms in the mess? Also, I do step 2 several times, each time into more detailed categories. Like this: First time, very large categories, such as "textil", "papers, books, stationary", "tools and paint", "cleaning equipment" etc. The next steps is to sort every category into more detailed categories. e.i. "textil" into 'blankets, bed pillows, bedspreads etc.', 'towels, bedsheets etc.', 'curtains, rugs etc.', 'coats', 'every day clothes', 'winter clothes', 'summer- and occasion clothes', 'clothes I already know I don't want to keep' (ok, starting step 3 there...), 'socks and tights' and so on. Then I keep sorting each category into more detailed categories, until I can get a grip of what I have, so I can move on and make decisions about what and how much of it I need to keep 'easy to reach', what is worth keeping in storage space (suitcases, not in season, extra stuff (for example socks and pencils, that I know I will get use for, once I've worn out the current ones), donate and trow away. The reasons I can't do all the categoriezing in one go is: 1. I don't have enough (physical) space for the number of piles it would take. and 2. I can only remember a certain number of piles, so if I try to sort into too many categories at once, I'll lose to much time asking myself "Where did I put all ... , again?". Even if I've tried naming all the categories and marking their piles with sheets of paper or post-it notes, it's still much slower reading all the signes to find the right pile, then keeping it down two a number I can remember. For me, this is quite a time consuming process. But definitely worth while!
That's what would help me, too - is to label piles with paper labeled appropriate categories...❤ Good luck to us all - I am a terrible procrastinator, the past couple of years.. shame on me...
Have any of you watched the no mess decluttering method? It’s life changing without the piles. Dana K White created it but ClutterBug and Minimal Mom both made good videos on it.
As much as we want it all dealt with in one go, we have to remember it takes months or years to get in that state, and its going to take time and repeated passes to get it all done, if we are doing it ourselves. I've also had to accept there's only so many decisions I can make in one day. There are a few things I've regretted getting rid of, although I still would rather have done this. But the natural limits space and time has its uses. I've been decluttering for 18 months and sometimes I look around and feel like I haven't made a dent. But if all the stuff I'd decluttered so far was piled up in the front yard I'd be shocked. Just to clarify its not all my stuff. Both parental households, a business, several children and hubby is a collector have passed through this property.
love this video bc everyone of the decluttering videos is somewhat useful with tactics but not helpful in the sense of emotional stress and physical strength to complete the job alone with other daily tasks
Holy crap! I am good at organizing even in small spaces and doing so in line with people’s habits in mind and was considering to monetize that skill. But this is showing me that I could NEVER be a professional organizer as people go WILD. Would also bug me to spend so much time to clean and organize only to have it turn back in less than a few weeks. Organizing is the easy part, creating habits to maintain it is the hard one that most never commit to. Respect to you!
Having asthma and allergies is not fun but thankfully it forces me to keep my room clean otherwise I get sick. It takes maturity and self discipline to take keep a home clean and healthy
People who are neurodivergent, or have mental or physical health issues are not immature nor lack discipline. Not everyone has the same operating system. It just makes individuals different, not better than or less than, just different.
I have one friend who always helped me to do this I am so glad he was there for me, too bad he moved far. I needed him to assist me 😢. 3 daughters an angry husband not fun at all. Me with the emotional load house , house children, my self is soo hard to not clutter cortners or closets garage. Attic. 😢. This is helpful thank you.❤
So i have bpd i love collecting or buying new stuff, and multiples of these things, creating mess, clutter and bad feng shui. Slowly getting through it all, its fun at times and other times jarring when theres too much mess and items. Thanks for this!
I love this so much. It was short enough to help me see through my clutter and the possibility of my room and life shining through. The visual really helped me because it’s comparable to my mess. Wow, subscribing and hoping!!!
... my dear Mom was super clean & organized, being an orphan, she grew up believing that she'd better earn her keep, or face the boot ... consequently, my childhood home never got dirty or disorganized, & she never taught me how to do that ... & tho l have improved a great deal since my early days, recently my (clean freak) daughter (guess organizing skipped a generation) & l had a big argument, because her remedy for my disorganization is to 'just thow everything out !!!' which l don't believe she'll ever understand the causes of, generating even more anxiety, condemnation & depression ... (thank God we don't live together !!!) ... but putting my world into beautiful order is something l'm determined to conquer, l just need to be around kind & helpful types, who can teach me those things l haven't yet fully mastered ... ❤❤❤😢❤❤❤
I’m just writing this down in a: 3 lined ringlet blue book, thank you so much for your viedeo that specializes of Chronic Decluttering; I really appreciate your video; I subscribed to your Chanel; again thank you for the video, I hope that I get to the decluttering slowly but surely
This is very hard - but, perhaps we can start with using small chunks of time, too, not just different categories...❤ - Different categories + using small chunks of time = Getting tbings done! Glad this came up - it made me think more clearly about this.
A big issue of mine is the moving things to appropriate rooms part. And to lay everything in front of myself to make decisions. My space is so small that there’s literally nowhere for me to move anything but outside. And even then, a lot of items don’t fit out the front door such as huge pieces of furniture that I hate. It is very hard for me to move in my own apartment, and would be even if it was completely empty because the square feet are so miniscule.
Hello Deva, it was nice listening to your journey and how calmly you handled everything and tried to correct things which did not work out. I wanted to know which skills are more useful in Ireland, does anything related to pmo, management useful to get a job there?
In the process of tidying up, I've keep a box of "perfectly good things" I have no need for ( -> no space for ). Sometimes, when there has been a friend over to my messy place, I've told them about it and asked them to see if there is anything they want there. It's been a nice way for me to get rid of "perfectly good things" (that I'd be much happier to "find a new home for", than just throw away). And, with a bit of luck, my friends can save the time and money it would have taken them to go shopping for whatever they managed to find. If, in the end, I can find space for it, I might keep a "guest goodiebag" box for declouthered stuff. (If I can manage to declutter that box from the stuff no one has needed in enough time. And know what be worth putting there and not. Maybe some can pull it off nicely?)
I am in a small motorhome. I never take food or drinks into my bedroom. I never leave crumbs or dirty dishes out as it will attract ants or other bugs. I have a certain place for everything and it must go back in that place. Shelves, hooks or cubbies for all the miscellaneous stuff. A few things left out and it looks a total mess but only takes a few minutes to clean up. Changing the bed is the hardest job. Purging whenever I deep clean, those items go into a small donate bin. I am ocd and can only stand stuff out of place for a short time.
Awesome making a short term move I. 2 Days but I will be returning for a full move in a couple of months. Most areas are under control but I have TONS of clothes to decide what to do with. This is so encouraging.
I have 4-5 25 quart size plastic bins with opaque lids they are for my clothes. They fit under my daybed. One for socks, & undergarments. One for t-shirts and long-sleeved tees, another for jeans, one for skirts and nicer matched tops. It's perfect so I don't end up with too many clothing items. All are folded and stored dust free. My closet holds shelves for craft materials in shoe boxes and a large 5 drawer dresser to hold fabric and completed projects quilt tops, etc. it works good, unless things get disorganized. 🎉
Being able to have a closet with shelves and storage under my daybed makes it easier to keep track of what i have. Labeling the boxes is very important so only those items go to where they belong. And you avoid duplicates.
try this and let me know if it helps. Take photos along the way. I’m going to start today. Visual may give us the needed push when we see what we got done so far.
Hello, a friend of mine recommended your page to me Lord knows I need help. Thank you so much. Going to watch your videos have a lot of decluttering I have to do clothes and shoes I don’t wanna get rid of. 😢
Also light incense or spray air freshener, and once cleared stuff, don't bring it back, take it out of the room! Haha 😄. I find it hard to get rid of things, but last week I took bags to the charity shop, it was a relief to get rid of old clothes n bric brac! UK 🇬🇧 lol 🇬🇧 😆 🤣
I so need your help, war with cancer, but feel like my house is closing in on me , got my husband to take down somethings , helps me alot, I need help with lots of things, the south is calling you , near Casino
It can happen that your clients have to reassess their clothes because part of them might have been in the wash while you were decluttering. Awesome work! ❤
Wow I have two rooms that needs this! One of those rooms my daughter has already organized for me. I just have to go through everything and clean, clean clean.
How would you know if it’s chronic clutter like someone for instance with add or a hoarding disorder ? How can one discern one from the other ! I have a family member who likes to collect certain things that lives with me and I take care of daily . This person has always collected papers , if all kinds . And other things . Person had a bedroom that is so messy . But they’re capable of cleaning , vacumimg ect . So could it also be Laziness in our case ?
I always wonder exactly how long it takes when there are videos like this that are sped up. I'm one person dealing with the items of at least three people, and I have limited time and energy. It looks like this room took probably a week that was with help!
Absolutely! They make it look so easy. We all work have stresses and both sap energy. I’m dining my bedroom and on the third day. It’s looking better. I have a very busy life and can’t work every day bc I have setbacks from covid
While typing, I realized, Maybe if we photographed the beginning, middle, we’d be more motivated to continue till the end. I’m very visual and need to SEE progress, that’s my answer. I get lost without seeing the finish line.
