Are you an INFJ? If you're still unsure whether you're an INFJ, we made this video to help you with that: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-D89N3_fFwrA.html PSIHugPSIHeartPSIHeyPSICheers
Remember my fellow INFJ's, these are all things you can work with. I used to be extremely closed up about my feelings, now I am very open about them. Im setting less high expectations for myself, and im working on everything else. You can beat all of these bad traits, I believe in you and you know you can do it.
Haha, thanks, friend. It's wild that I didn't even know it was a rare type when I took the test 2 weeks ago. And I am at a point in my life where I'm trying to find a balance between myself. I'm working on all of these and I'm making progress. It can be done it's just wild that I'm seeing this video pop up while I had what could basically be a therapy session with my friend earlier tonight.
Trying! When I find the courage to open up I often get told I'm too much or causing everyone stress, which just reinforces the habit of not telling ppl things lol
You got this, IU totally get that. I'd recommend talking with a therapist as if you might come off as too much, it may be because you have so much difficult emotions you are dealing with in silence. Therapy can be scary at first, but it's so incredibly helpful. It's important to keep going though@@moondroparcana
The worst part of being an INFJ is feeling like you always give so much to absolutely everyone, and then not feeling like you get enough in return. But then hiding the fact that it hurts because it would make them feel bad too and that’s the LAST thing you want!
Being an INFJ is so hard, we love planning and perfecting everything but in the same time, we love to procastinate and overthinking. I want to socialize but i want to be alone :')
I also find I don't have a good feel for how long something takes. So when I plan my workday, I think a project will take an hour. When it takes four, it throws off my entire plan and I get stressed out.
As an INFJ, I feel as if I always have to be perfect, and it's exhausting. I tend to have mood swings, I definitely bottle things up, and I feel as if I have to be the one who holds things and I'm definitely known to be a bit stubborn. It really describes me so much, and I hope one day I'll be able to stop setting such high standards for myself.
It feels like you stole my whole thoughts... Mee too sis.. I rather want things on track that I planned.. And I am too stubborn for my family and I want to be perfect in my schedule that I would be upset if anything interferes... It's tooo frustrating 😭
You don’t have to be perfect. Perfection is unattainable for humans. You’re fighting a losing battle. You’re just a human, like everyone else. Accept it.
@@definitelynotJumana You don’t have to be perfect. Perfection is unattainable for humans. You’re fighting a losing battle. You’re just a human, like everyone else. Accept it.
I personally think the hardest part of being an INFJ is how I can NEVER balance between two opposite traits of my personality. it's like being a walking contradiction. I tend to be hardworking, but also lazy. I procrastinate, but I'm a big perfectionist. I'm always optimistic about my big dreams, but I'm also pessimistic about them. I don't like it when I get disrespected, but I disrespect myself even more. I hate not having a plan or not being able to plan something out, but I equally hate going by a routine or a list because it always makes me feel rushed. I like to have a lot of friends, but i fear social interactions with all of my heart. Compliments make me feel good about myself, but they also make me feel undeserving. See how confusing and frustrating that is? And what's even harder, is that some people who are like me find it very difficult or sometimes impossible to be passionate or ambitious about something, because we either simply get bored after it gets uninteresting, or become too obsessive over how perfect it needs to be And it gets very overwhelming having to be torn between polar opposite traits of my personality. Having the ability to understand and sympathize with many people to the point of being worn down by their concerns and feeling but never being understood myself makes it even more overwhelming Edit: would any of you find it ironic that this long rant was written by a 15 year old? 🙃🙃
Exactly what I wanna say but often when we try to tell these things to others no one cares to listen in the end I just keep these kind of thoughts to myself thinking that maybe I am bothering someone and it's only me being weird🥺🥺
@@agampreetkaur4523 exactly. It's very difficult to find someone who'd listen to us and understand us instead of calling us weird and indecisive. One of the main reasons why we like to keep to ourselves is if we attempt to talk to someone about our real selves. They never understand
I can realate to that its true because you want to tell someone how you fell but than your think you are going to brother him/her and than you tell yourself you shouldnt tell it and keep everything to yourself isnt easy because after a time your going to burnout
actually i found it but it really takes time,i was having a small chance to make friends with her but she approach me first so i kinda grateful because at least i have one person that only understands me as an INFJ
I feel this to my core. I always worry about what people think of me and I overthink situations and conversations constantly. I want attention, but at the same time I want to be left alone and I’m too afraid to open up.
As an ENFP I urge all you INFJ’s to find someone you can trust or at the very least find creative ways to let out the emotions. Regardless of personality type some worries and anxieties are not healthy when bouncing around in your head. Much love for my INFJ brothers and sisters. ❤
im thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me........................... (help)
The hardest part of being an INFJ is that we always want to be selfless because we care too much, but will end up regretting it because we doesn't feel appreciated. Yet, still doing it again and again.
Another “dark side INFJ” thing is we’re a walking contradiction. And we have lots of interests, as well as want people to know them, but don’t want to say them
I’m a Virgo but I have no idea how that affects being INFJ. XD I loved this video, my mother and I are both INFJ’s and we tend to feed off of each others overthinking! It’s helped me a lot though, it’s easier to remind myself not to over think! Anyone know about Virgo? I’m really curious and love learning :3
1: ✓ bottling up negative emotions 2: ✓ abruptly cutting people out of their lives 3: ✓ extremely high expectations 4: ✓ moodiness 5: ✓ self-destructive 6: ✓ stubbornness oops
The hardest challenge for me being an INFJ is the feeling of isolation. No matter how hard I work to make deep relationship with other people, I'm always ending up alone and feel alien in my own world.
As a INFJ i’m feeling exactly the same way, i wish i could do something to change this, sometimes i feel so selfish because i feel like i’m not grateful for my family and my friends but i just can’t stop feeling alone even if i’m not. So I’d rather be alone than with people.
Being an INFJ is kinda like you are positive in everything and negative in everything, like profectionist and procrastinator, or also at least for me extrovert AND introvert.
I tried for a long time to bottle up my emotions, and even recently when it came to a breaking point I still started with "I don't mean to burden you" or "If you feel uncomfortable or annoyed you can tell me to stop"
Same here For school projects I do most of the work and usually I pick somebody who has trouble learning so this project will help boost their grades. Actually is the opposite they pick me I was a loner so they want me to help them. And I was so happy. And after everything was done I asked them, "Are you ok with this?" "I am not forcing you to say what you don't want" " Do you like it?" And they are like "It's perfect" and after still thinking maybe he or she was nice and did not want to upset me. Its so exhausting
@@HEROSASUKE99I can’t agree more Sometimes I feel like a therapist who herself need therapy I seriously tend to bottle my feelings And when I talk abt them later on I feel embarrassed on opening up It’s seriously tiring😩
This is so true,it's like, io have a high expectations in an exam that I study so much time and it's easy for me but then I do it so much worse, thinking that I do it great but no,I hate that...
I'd say I probably most fear getting to deep in over my head and not being able to dig myself out ... So I guess commitment issues and thusly everything has to be perfect before I commit ... Anyways, keep on keeping on infj friend
True. But at the same time, i also feel like i shouldnt care. There are times when im anxious about something and that anxiety will disappear randomly and i brush it up as if im overreacting or i forgot about it.
I'm really glad that as an INFJ, I try to improve my character and slowly get rid of my flaws instead of pretending they just don't exist. Of course, it's very hard to completely get rid of your flaws but every time I lessen the extremeness of my flaws I feel much better than I did before and much more proud of myself! I've actually only recently become aware of my inability to accept changes and I'm currently working on becoming more open to changes so wish me luck! :D
Good luck. I never saw these traits in me, but then I got into a relationship and now I do lmfaoooo. Really hard for me to truly recognize and change these things because I feel like everything I do makes sense, but I know I'm most likely just in denial.
@@shamstam Exactlyy, sometimes me thinking that everything I do makes sense in turn makes me think what if everyone's just smart and I'm the dumb one. I'm just in denial really. I can relate so hard, being aware of the stuff is easy but actually seriously acknowledging that stuff and wanting to change is hard.
Finding out I was "rare" was more of a epiphany for me than a source of Pride. It made everything else make more sense; why I felt like no one understood me, why I couldn't find people who I truly connected with, and why I felt like an Alien sent down to observe the Earthlings. Luckily I've found some IRL friends (3) who have the same type, and who I can commiserate with now. x)
Same, like there was this time more than one ppl wants to talk to me about something and i try to talk to them all at once. I fell asleep in class afterwards
Same. Only relationship I can keep going with is with my husband. Something about having that intense deeper relationship keeps it in lock. Just like with my children. They're mine & we share a life together, so I am bonded with them. I am also close with certain family members..but cannot fully open up to anyone else who makes me uncomfortable. If I cannot trust someone, I pull away. I'm not even close with my own mother and my siblings only know half of me I want to show them. It's difficult. I've learned as I've gotten older to FORCE myself to change. To be authentic, to calm down, let things roll off my back, and trust that most people aren't out to get me and that they have their own trauma to deal with. It helps a lot.
Hey there’s all infj’s here! But I agree, I don’t think I’ve ever met an infj and now that I think about it I’ve always felt something off about all the friends I do have
@@elchin5805 same. I was quite, well how do I put it, dissatisfied when I saw that an INFJ was one of the rarest personality types. It made sense too. Recently I’ve been feeling lonelier than ever, without having one friend with common interests 🙁 I hope one day I meet a person who is like me and we can be the bestest of friends 🙂🌱
@@nissachavez23 Never let your personality type upset you mate because we're blessed to have this personality. It's the rarest type and that's what makes us unique individuals of this world.
Being misunderstood is my biggest fear as an infj. And then I make up all these conversations in my head trying to clear the misunderstanding, but never really clear them irl
Tbh being an infj is not at all that special as people like to exaggerate it, we are just messed up people trying to live our lives through this hell hole of our super intuitive inner side and a natural habit of overthinking with tons of trust issues everyday, just wanna give a hug to all my fellow infj's out there, you are a fighter! Omg I didn't expected this to blow up....thank you so much for the back hugs! Love you fellow INFJ's And again, not all INFJ's are like that too...yeah some may have been successful to overcome their weaknesses which I'm trying to do too, that's the way human beings evolve and become stronger, but that doesn't mean that an infj can't overcome all this, it takes time and experience to control these traits and use them for our own benefit
The hardest thing about an INFJ is understanding everyone else and their issues but you're never able to discover yourself or find your own solutions..
Well the key to understanding yourself is gone curious of yourself. Ask yourself questions as to like why am I feeling this or what is this? It's not impossible to discover yourself... You will be a lot stronger for it once you reach the depths of yourself
Im an INTP with an INFJ sister. But like damn because we know each other so well she shows her manipulative side very often and I dó understand her which doesnt make things better because we see through each other like glass. She literally manipulates me by saying stuff like "Dont tell them this or I will tell them your darkest secrets you dont even know I know about
For me, the hardest part of being a INFJ is trying to match everyone's energy when I'm with them, to the point I don't know who's the real me without feeling like I'm just pretending Edit: To everyone that liked and replied, let’s all gather together and give each other a hug, we really need it
As an INFJ I found these relatable, though some were more relatable than others. I especially related to the bottling up emotions, and pushing people away.
Okay but being an INFJ feels like a living hell just because of how contradicting your thoughts are. Really makes you question who you are and every choice you make that it feels like you're going crazy. To all my fellow INFJs out there. We will make it through! Keep your head up!
Being an INFJ is hard because it feels like a constant mental showdown between anxiety and fear of failure but also wanting deep, emotional relationships. It's like a struggle of being introverted but wanting the benefits of extroversion... if that makes sense.
In a nutshell, we have friends, but we can't make real connections whit them. Is hard af to show how we feel, because we know nobody is going to understand us.
I don't know why everyone thinks being an INFJ is great coz it's rare It's not easy to be an INFJ, I wish I had a different personality tbh We try to understand everyone, but we ourselves are so complicated that others fail to understand us. We want to socialize but are extroverted only toward family and close friends or sometimes not towards them either coz our moods really fluctuate We never even realize when we start moving away from people in a lonely corner I keep really high expectations of myself, coz I don't wanna disappoint anyone Most of the time when I'm down or going through something, I mostly cry alone, I don't have a shoulder, rather I don't want one coz I don't wanna put my problems on others As much as I like to laugh and smile, I like to stay alone... My fellow INFJs, we know this is relatable, but I'm sure there's always a way to be happy and live a better life. Let's try to change ourselves for the better, of course, we can't change our personality but we can definitely change our habits, right? I hope everyone is doing well. BIG HUGS!! Edit: Thank you for the likes and replies, hopefully, we can share our problems and find those people in our life who will understand us. Once again let's change for the better. Loads and loads of Love, Support, hope and best wishes
It's very much relatable. I have typed INFJ on several tests, including in school. I also have learned about the types, really analysed it. Sometimes I relate to other types but INFJ is how my mind ticks. These problems are tough ones and i too deal with them. However, with those you are more open to, if you have managed to find someone you trust, tell them. I hate being negative and talking about my issues as I worry I make other's feel down, especially when my mam has accused me of making her upset because she saw me cry. That situation made me feel so guilty and upset. HOWEVER, it is still important to talk about your feelings. Even if you don't understand them, and are so overwhelmed that you can't explain properly, and need to think, just let people know. I tell my boyfriend when I'm upset because he asked me to. It really helps, and I always tell him to let me know if anything ever bothers him. It's no burden to me. It's ok not to live up to expectations. I have really struggled this year with my work, but I have learned that being good at things is not always your best. Sometimes your best is just ok. And that's ok :) be kind as you are to others :) I have no solution for the one about cutting ties. I am bad at keeping in contact because I often focus on very close relationships, such as my family and boyfriend. I really try to remember to reach out to friends, but I have let go of many. I feel no loss in less interaction, but certainly guilt, because I never really stop caring about people. I forgive quickly, unless I am hurt repeatedly, then I turn cold. The 'door slam' is what that would be I suppose 😅 Also my boyfriend didn't think I was introverted because I am so open to him, but the opposite with others haha 😂 But I am actually probably more easily over stimulated and socially drained than he is 😂 Hugs :)
You have no idea how much this comment spoke to me. You described how I feel in a way I could never. I'm really bad at explaining how I feel. Sending love
Extremely relatable but for me I've just given up hope that's I'll find someone who'll understand... I just feel like I'll end up being disappointed as usual if I do :(
I am deffinetly a INFJ. In all my freindships i am the one person whos always open and always listens and tries to help. I love to help people feel good about them self while I am secretly suffering. I have many, many hardships in life. I try to hide my emotions even though I need help, I dont want people to worry about me. I try to tell myself I am cool and are helping not hurting, I have increadably low self esteem. I never feel confident and are constantly worrying about what people think of me even ifs the way I eat or the way I look. When i grow up i want be a counselor and wnt to help all the people with mental problems. I hope one day I can change the world. this channle has helped me out. it has helped me figure out I have secret annxoity and secretly hate myself. thank you for all the advice and facts. :)
if you're wondering why there are so many infj's online when we're the rarest personality type, my theory is that we just prefer to socialize like this lol
Being an infj isn’t that special- it just feels like I’m weirder than everyone else ngl i didnt think so many people would actually respond i kinda feel better ig
@@Alexandra-hg9pz that’s pretty dumb. Not you, but the circumstance. why did they find that out anyways? It doesn’t change anything at all, you’re literally the same person with a new label
Test: you are an INFJ Friend: you are an INFJ Parents: you are an INFJ Heart: you are an INFJ God: you are an INFJ Brain: let’s take the test again for the tenth time just to make sure...
Yeah, there's always that small doubt in some corner. " what if..... it's not what it seems? Let's do it again just one more time" . Trying to chase and CATCH that " 100% " assurance and satisfaction really drives one crazy xD
This made me feel so much better after knowing tons of people go through the same thing and that people understand. This is one thing I would never be able to express in my own words. ❤
1. bottling up negative emotions 1:16 2. abruptly cutting people out of their lives 1:53 3. extremely high expectations 2:31 4. moodiness 3:04 5. self-destructive 3:34 6. stubbornness 4:13 I hope I could help! (: -INFJ
From an outsiders perspective (INTP) with an INFJ sister: We dont really like each other that much because I know how manipulative she can be and we can see right through each other which creates this passive agressive sphere. She literally says stuff like "Dont tell them this or I will tell them your darkest secrets you didnt know I know about". So I'd say interactions like that and me not knowing how to handle that broke our trust in each other. Not sure if this is relevant to your comment but Id thought id share it anyways.
@@simianto9957 Oh, thats okay. As an infj, i think she doesnt want to be open about those things she doesnt want anyone to know because most of us are shy, but its still bad that she tries to manipulate you. I think you both should communicate more and understand each other :)
Believe me I can relate to what you just said so completely I mean wow I'm still processing this because. I just I'm 62 years old and it's taking me this long to find something out wow I've been in and out of therapy since I was 24 years old I don't know I would think that maybe I would have..... I mean I'm not 100% sure but I am pretty sure that cuz I have most of the traits I am like seven out of eight of the positive ones in the negative ones I mean I just I just stopped it because there was something the most homework after that damn that's all end up getting caught up in all these crazy situations helping people and end up like you said getting hurt thank you for your input
I recently performed the test and discovered that I'm an INFJ, and now I have answers to most of my questions that were never answered by anyone else. The most shocking part is the thoughts that I mostly get dissolved about others that allow me to understand them in a better way but I ain't have words to explain mine.
As an INFJ, I’d say my biggest weakness is that I become too loyal to people I’m close to, and then it’ll become impossible to make any other connections ;-;
I relate to all of these - especially in my younger years - when my boundaries were shit. As I got older, I started to chill out, let go, and develop healthier boundaries.
@@sophiaisabelle01 I think the best way to overcome it is to focus on the moment and be aware of the people and things around us...good luck everyone 🧡💙🌏
being one of the rarest personality type doesn’t always mean positive aspects. it also includes the fact that finding another INFJ is almost impossible and not even yourself can understand your emotions. overall it sucks. sending love to all my fellow INFJ’s!
Once you start cutting out the people who don't even try to get you and start being more open about your INFJ ass, other INFJs will come along. When I came across the test, I sent a link to many of my friends out of curiosity. And in my inner circle were 3 other INFJs and some pretty close personality types. But they are also hard to handle sometimes - just like me. We need a LOT of acceptance on and from various levels.
This is a good and fairly accurate video. I'm an INFJ-T. A few things though: I don't tend to lash out, I usually bottle it up and tell them it's fine when they've wronged me, but I may distance myself from them for a bit. I don't really cut anyone out of my life, but when things start to get overwhelming, I put some distance between us for a time. I still try to offer help, but I'm less available. I just feel like I need time to sort through things. The high expectations is an interesting one. While I'm generally a perfectionist, I don't hold those same expectations for others. As long as people try, I'm happy with that. Everything else was spot on! Thank you for the video!
The hardest thing about being and INFJ is our ability to see through people and understand them and yet none of the other personalities can understand us INFJ. I guess it's how it is for the personalities to be balanced well.
This is just me but I feel as though it is situational for the other personalities for example I am a infp yet I am a lot less open which leads to hardly anyone caring/trying to care. While infj’s May get it the most it can happen to other people as well
Yeah, especially when you can basically HEAR the person's thoughts and cut them off in conversation because you know them that well. You never mean to make them feel like you don't care or you think they're predictable you just wanna engage in the conversation because you're interested
Mm. As an INFJ, I for one can always see when you're compulsively lying, but I leave it alone because maybe you'll be happy of I do, or of you have a bad day, or need a hug. But people never see through the stupid lies I tell so it's like they don't know me, they believe me when I say my days' been great, and never am I offered a hug. It's okay tho, I know other have it worse. Lmao just wanted to vent
All these are so true, and honestly I don't know why people "deeply crave to be INFJ" to feel "cool and special" when in fact, you as an INFJ don't feel special at all but instead you spend your time overthinking and trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with you for being the way you are and then realizing you're doomed for life if you don't try to change yourself and the traits of your own freaking personality. It's a struggle.
Honestly I just feel like I’m crazy. I understand everything yet nothing, feel dumb yet the smartest person on the planet. I am extremely hard on myself and yet get cocky with things every once in awhile. So yeah, I feel insane.
I go between an ENFJ/INFJ. I feel like this video helped me realize the duality that is displayed in my personality. I have been described by others throughout my life as “bossy” yet “quiet” and “friendly” yet “mean”. I realize this is likely because I am highly sensitive and absorb everything around me on top of already having my own things to worry about, so when I am overstimulated, I tend to lash out or become bitter although generally that is not how I am. I am usually bubbly and friendly and I have learned to openly express my feelings (part of my E), so I can see how this duality could confuse other people. I love spending time with others while also having my own time so my feelings are always contradicting, but I am getting better at knowing when I need to step away and who to avoid to keep my own peace and thus maintain positive relationships around me. Reading the comments, this duality seems to be the case for many others too, so it is nice to hear others’ experiences as well.
INFJs are literally walking contradictions. As human beings we are social creatures yet we dislike social interaction most of the time. We are super emotional and really deep thinkers yet we fake a persona to fit in. We are artists and desire to create, yet it all has to be done by our own specific processes. We desire for every one around us to be happy and feel free while we live in our self created pain. We are are actually quite black in white in how we feel, yet we hardly have a straight answer for what we’re thinking.
Yes I always feel like I have an extreme personality, I can be cruel, cold but also I can be kind and warm. I would neglect everything when I don’t want to feel anything but also thought about things so deeply.
Fr I deadass went full philosophical on the quote, “ever wonder why were here?” From red vs blue in gym class today. Ps if you don’t know what that is or haven’t watched it then you should.
@@Someguy028 BRUHH-- LITERALLY- I FEEL DEPRIVED OF A GOOD CONVERSATION. like god, he could just be made up, by some old greedy man, the whole idea of the world, the universe is irrelevant, we are gonna die, but I still wanna know, like what if aliens are controlling us, deadass, what if we are being controlled by people outside of us, like we are a game and this is some stupid roleplay to them.
@@cosmic9arrow I thought of this in multiple different ways. Whenever I get up to play my ps4 everyday(I'm grounded now tho) and or waking up, getting on the bus, and continuing. If that's what you mean then most definitely yes)'-'(
To be clear alot of people bottle up thier emotions , that doesnt make you infj , the real infj is when you listen to almost everyone and care about their emotions while you cannot do the same yourself , you can never trust anyone to open up to , also this makes you wanna be away from everyone as much as possible bc if you know people then that means you have to listen without being listened to.
And I have this thing that I can't stop doing😔cut relationship with friend because of disappointment, I have high expectations with people and I hate that.
This is so true to me. I see everything in perspective especially when it's presented like this. Always have been keeping things to myself thinking that nobody will ever understand me. And I think I find that easier than having to explain myself further too and be vulnerable.
ngl i started crying when i read the INFJ description on the myers briggs test. it felt like for the first time in my life someone understood how i felt.... i’m too uncomfortable to talk to even my closest friends about something that’s even remotely personal to me
INFJs can have friends, actually... often very good friends. It's possible that you haven't met anyone who takes the trouble to understand you properly yet, though. Try to be open to it and you'll hopefully get there, and in the meantime just... try not to overthink it, either. A good criteria for a potential friend is "Does this person truly care about other people?" ^_^
oof, as an INFJ, that does hit hard, but, ofc we do have friends, but just a few of them, and whoever they are have a REEEEEEEALLY close bonds w/ them. So in my perspective, quality is better than quantity.
As an INFJ i have to say i feel a little bit insane. Like i just don't fit in and i've been trying my whole life to 'come up with a personality, or show a side of me' that others will like. And now, i'm having an identity crisis because i just don't know who am i. I feel like i'll never find someone who understands me and value my traits, like truly. So, it's not fun being an INFJ, cuz i have to please myself when i'm alone, but i also feel the need to please others when i feel like going out and socialize. And even tho i know this is not good, i just don't know what to do about it.
i read this and all i could think was, same girl, same. just exactly same. its rather fascinating how there are actually people like me, because most of the time i feel like NO ONE is (which is usual but, i feel it ig more extreme.) a few months ago i came to realise im a misfit. a label cant work for me. a style. an aesthetic. so i try to just do what feels good, and don't care too much about, anything whatsoever
You don't need others to like you. Just be kind to people and you don't have to go through an identity crisis cause whatever you do or how you are like it's you. So, don't be afraid of welcoming the new you and just go at it cause it's you.
Don't do anything about it. Stop trying to be somebody else, be yourself. The only thing you can do to improve yourself is listen. People will tell you and if it don't that's their problem.
Took the personality test and was told I was INFJ in 2012 but it makes sense I don’t like labeling myself we are all unique as individuals no matter what you are
I think the hardest thing about INFJs is we want answers and facts and perfection. But, we are artist and musicians and writers, and we are good at it. But a lot of the time we do not like these activities we are good at because we become obsessive and controlling and want it to be perfect but no matter how hard we try it will never be perfect to us. We are the type A yet left brain people. It is frustrating. You can tell us all you want how amazing we are at something but only we can decide for ourselves whether we’re good at it. Don’t try to change our minds, we do not trust your word because we know opinions are not facts. And we want facts.
@@egoistagattoildiofelino7942 I've though about what you said for a while, and I can see that I had the same situation like these where I give up on something or a project just because I didn't reach the perfection I wanted or *was it the perfection you believe they wanted?* Think about! We INFJs do things while considering many perspectives and opinions, for a simple example, an INFJ author ,who writes novels, would prefer to focus on adding events that would catch most attention and favoritty rather than putting his unique ideas, that's why they'll be obssessive whether what they made is "perfect" in any readers' eyes! Just like a fact that none can deny easily! So in conclusion, you loved your theatre activity cuz you found yourself filled with ideas and passion for it, but because you pressured yourself with others' perspectives when someone is not satisfied with your results, you as well become the same while not noticing. (Pls correct me if I misunderstood you! And sorry for my bad grammar 😅✋I hope I helped you see and understand the situation more clear )
Kinda reminds me of another quote someone said: "Sex is like fire, inside fireplace (marriage) it will warm up your home, anywhere else and it will burn the entire place down". So don't play with fire :)
@@yungfelix5079 meaning sex is not only skin deep thing it connects souls of people so you have to be very careful while doing it, if you do it properly in the right context as it was intend then it can be a great thing, but if you are reckless with sex you can get into all kinds of trouble both emotional and physical, you shouldn't play around with it. It affects both parties.
The best advice for INFJs is to get used to being lonely because most of time you are. Sometimes you’ll find someone you can actually connect with but that is once in a blue moon. Enjoy being alone but find the connection with the world and your true self. I wish you the best!
That's so sad ;( are you guys ok? I know sometimes it is a lot (especially as an introvert), but you know, there are a lot of other people in this world that will help you to feel less lonely (for example an other INFJ person or just really good friends). Don't forget it is still just a theory (which is sometimes accurate, but I believe humanity - people are to special to be categorized in 16 personalities). Yes I know, sometimes it's hard to be empathetic, to overthink a lot, to feel the pain of the whole world and all the other aspects that fits in this personality type etc. but don't forget the beauty of it. How wonderful to know all the love and appreciation in the world (I know, we all "love" to see the bad parts, but isn't it lovely to know how many good people there are that feel very similar and have the same tendency to do good in the world as we do ourself?). Just keep going, share your thoughts with someone you trust, try to understand yourself and let people in your life that will make you less lonely - even there will be some times where you are really lonely - but I think, probably every human in this world will experience that loneliness in their own way. Much love and appreciation (and a big hug) for everyone (thanks for reading and sorry for alllllll the grammar mistakes etc. T.T don't judge- I will already hate myself enough for it 😅) 😘
I've known I was INFJ-T for a while now, taken the test multiple times and gotten the same result each time. Never realized how much of my actions were on account of my personality type. I'm a perfectionist but huge procrastinator, I've always known I'm incredibly intelligent but never put forth the work (been told by almost all teachers over the years), and I try to help all my friends through their problems expecting nothing in return but satisfaction knowing I did good, want to socialize and be quick and witty like other people but my brain has to sit and think of the perfect response instead of speaking my mind. Love these videos from y'all, definitely been a big help on my journey to finding myself, so thank you.
There are a lot of INFJ's online because we are searching the internet to try to understand ourselves. However, even after all this time, I still don't understand myself...
I’m happy to see there is always people to understand you and you’re never alone, it’s really underwhelming and I love this community, not just INJF, also others who tried to understand us, so grateful x)
Being an INFJ...we always live in our own world and expect this world to be the same, I find very difficult to adjust myself to new things and we pressurize ourself mentally alot. It's very difficult to make yourself fit into normal things that this entire world does. N one more thing, we are not that good at finding a true friend because we don't trust anyone easily (in my case it's like this). So, being an INFJ is very exhausting cuz we are rare and we don't fit in with everyone. This is what think in my case. (Like if u r an INFJ).
INFJ here, and can relate to ALL of the points you brought up. It's a work in progress to work on these toxic traits, but it's the only way I know how to live. It'll be hard to re-wire my brain into acting/being different
Haha also same! But very encouraging all the same. I'd taken Myers-Briggs tests a few times and initially got INFJ but thought "No that can't be right if it's so rare..." but this video really confirms a lot of issues I've been noticing about myself or suspecting. Helps to know what my weaknesses are so I can work on them!
i feel like being an INFJ is hard because you're always giving yourself to others when they need someone, but you don't realize you're the one that needs support the most. you dont realize it because you're busy being everyone else's support and it starts to drain your energy so you hide away, shut down and recharge. if that makes sense.
That's not always the case. Being someone else's support isn't always tiring for INFJ's. In fact, they don't have many opportunities to be there for someone (emotionally) because our society is growing more and more private. It's more like they want to be the support.
@@se1kura928 I would say it is like wanting to be the support until you realize someone just contacts you for the sole reason to be the threapist again and not for the fun stuff anymore. It's like...helping gives me energy back until it get's into this kind of pattern and suddenly it drain's energy every time i see they try to contact me. My best friend is very outgoing and dramatic, but helping them gives me always energy back, we have a good time and still laugh a lot. The people that share their problems and go right afterwards are...tirying on the other hand
As an INFJ, I take everything to heart without showing it (I tend to be overemotional, but only in my head if that makes sense). Every little criticism I receive is a big deal to me even if it wasn't meant to be and I end up doing everything I can to fix it because it's in my nature to try to be "perfect" even though perfect is unachievable... Being INFJ is so complex and exhausting, I wish I could not care as much of what others think!!
This is true, with text messages after someone sends a message it ends up taking me over an hour just to write it, because I worry so much about how it would impact the other person, when it's just a simple text message. It's quite exhausing.
I am married to an INFJ, and have a sister that is an INFJ as well. They often expect the rest of us to know what is happening inside of them without actually communicating what is happening inside of them. My mantra is “we cannot read your mind”.
Thank you. Sending you a hug back. I hope that you will take some time for yourself and be kind to yourself 'cause as an INFJ I know how we can beat ourselves up and keep having negative thoughts. That's literally what I'm going through and I don't want anyone else to go through it.
This is the funniest thing to me right now after connecting with this stuff. I thought I was nuts for a minute. Happy to find out that it’s just my personality trait. Took me 15mins to go through a huge roller coaster of emotions. Best RU-vid account around. Obviously this isn’t proven but man I believe it could be fact. This is the first time I’m hearing these studies of tendencies and it’s so relatable for me.
1. bottling up negative emotions 2. Abruptly cutting people out of their lives 3. Extremely high expectations 4. Moodiness 5. Self destructive 6. Stubbornness
As an INFJ, I always see deeper meaning in everything. Because of that, I tend to over analyze people being nice to me and think they actually have an entire scheme behind it. I have extreme trust issues.
Biggest tip I can give to fellow INFJs is to remember that you can’t save everyone and you can’t help someone who won’t help themselves. Also go out and meet tons of people, it’s uncomfortable but that’s how you find those people you make really close relationships with
I need to be completely left alone at least 3 times a week otherwise I don't cope! My nightmare would be a large group holiday with no chance to be alone or the Big Brother house! I'd lock myself in the toilet for a good hour to just sit alone and pretend I'm constipated haha
...and that is the reason why I will never try relationships. Practically all people I know who are in relationships, every single bit of "alone/refuel" time gets completely shoved out, which would bug the living shit out of me. Because you know, if someone is needing alone time, then that person MUST be hiding something (aka BS drama which I also intently hate).
@@gamr13th for me, my girlfriend BECAME the alone time. if i ever felt like relaxing or just refueling i'd go and talk to her. don't be like me. we broke up and now i can't function.
@@Becky-vb8fs I also relate to this. This last month I spent my time with a lot of people and don't get me wrong, I had a great time. But coming home I didn't have any source of energy in me. As an INFJ, I notice we tend to need our personal space from time to time :")
I didn't know I was an INFJ before this, I took the test and didn't really understand it. Leme just say this explained so much. It's like all the things it took me years to realize about myself that no-one around me seemed to understand but someone explained it easily with a 5-minute animation and gave it a name. And reading the comments makes me feel a lot better, because I get to see more people explaining problems I relate too but was ever able to put into words.
yeah. And when I say I'm fine, I usually trick ppl into thinking I am. I don't want people to see what's really going on, it's embarrassing & I hate it, hate it hate it! And this is why I can never get help. Therapy, Counseling? No, because I don't want anybody to know. I don't want to talk to anybody about this. Not even a stranger. People are too judgemental, I'm scared that someone is going to judge me. 😀 and someone will 😆
This almost made me cry. It was so on the spot about who I am and how I relate to the world and the closest around me. I feel like this personality type is a gift and a curse all in one.
After a point, I've just stopped expecting anything from anyone, because I know I have high standards that no one will bother meeting. I'm a definition of "disappointed but not surprised"
What people think about INFJs: - This is the best personality since it is the most rare - The think/say we are *unique* What we think: what does he/she mean by unique? In the good way or in the wrong way? Why am I questioning this tho? This is not overthinking right? Hold on, am I overthinking about overthinking?
I need an answer for everything, especially about myself because even I get confused with myself lol I've taken countless online tests about almost everything about me, be it my eye colour, or my romantic type, or even a mental illness (I'm through that phase) I just get really wound up if it's unclear. I used to repeatedly ask my friends what job I'd be good at, what am I good at etc and I find it annoying too
@@georgememmott4398 ok wtf that is so me i look up everything having to do with me whether it's personality or health related and it's been almost two years and I haven't been able to decide if i really want to stick with my current undergrad course lol fml
I don’t want to be rare :( bc an infj so Its like this feeling of overthinking and 3:52 thingy?? I DONT KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE IT and you feel what other ppl might be feeling but other ppl are clueless of how u feel ahh:’) But yeah I agree what u said
Being an infj isn’t wonderful as it seems. I always overthinking about literally EVERYTHING. When I learned my mbti type as an infj I was shocked cuz I never expected this ‘rarest’ personality type. For me, others’ feelings are more important than mine. It hurts cuz I think I should help EVERYONE and I just can’t help myself. I can be an amazing problem-solver for my friends and my family but I can’t solve my own problems. So I feel uncomfortable and overwhelmed, sometimes I just wanna be alone in my room and I don’t wanna go out. It hurts guys but I love helping others and it heals me 😚
@@kittenmimi5326 absolutely right. People think being ‘rare’ is something special and they think we haven’t got any problems. Just because we solve their problem doesn’t mean we’re totally fine. It’s hard and they just can’t see it. Sometimes I scream so loud with my smile, with my eyes, with my words but no one can hear me. We should rest, guys. We should rest
As an INFJ, I actually have literal empathy- in other words, anything negative emotion can literally affect me physically because I am such a sponge for emotion. I can be fine one second and then crying at the drop of a hat because someone is mad. I can't tell you how frustrating that is.
People have always said I'm too dramatic or emotional, so since I was a teenager I bottled up my emotions and I prefer to be alone or remain quiet to not bother anyone.
1. Bottling up emotions, makes me really ill. 2. I have cut so many people out of my life including my real father. 3. I'm told I'm very moody 5. Very self destructive and ALWAYS overthink 6. Very stubborn Totally me
I just discovered my personality type. Watching such relatable content like this helps me to understand myself better and easier. This is very accurate, it's hard for me to tell people what kind of personality I have and now I can simply say that I'm an INFJ-T. 😌✨
If you really want to take it a step further, you should look into cognitive functions. Because the deciding factors of the personality types aren’t the 4 letters. The 4 letters are very surface level in MBTI. It’s actually the 4 cognitive functions behind them that really matter. I didn’t truly feel confident until I looked into cognitive functions and realized, yup, I’m an INFJ. Cognitive functions help you understand yourself on a deeper level, and throughout your day, you may find yourself connecting what you say and do to the cognitive functions you have. Also, just a side note. Don’t take the 16 personalities quiz lol. It’s actually not accurate, and bases it off of the four letters, and inaccurate definitions of the 4 letters. (That’s not to say it’s never accurate though. It’s just based on inaccurate info, and it’s not “true MBTI”) So even if it gives you your actual type (which is kind of unlikely), it was the wrong method. There’s a lot of better MBTI quizzes out there. Like Cloverleaf. But seriously, the best and most accurate way to find out is through cognitive functions. If you haven’t already, you should look into it!
Being an INFJ is really hard, you always tend to care more, that's why the moment you lose your caring spirit for someone, it means you're too hurt to be there for them any longer. It's not easy to cut them off, but eventually, you'll do.
Im an INTP with an INFJ sister. But like damn because we know each other so well she shows her manipulative side very often and I dó understand her which doesnt make things better because we see through each other like glass. She literally manipulates me by saying stuff like "Dont tell them this or I will tell them your darkest secrets you dont even know I know about.
I'm an INFJ, I took the test last year, around September. When I got my result, I doubted it, so I took the test again (to make sure the test wasn't fooling me and to give myself peace of mind) and I got INFJ again. I decided to take the test again for the last time, for verification and I got it again. As I read more about my personality, I understand why I feel this way. Hate to say this but for me, those dark side mentioned in the video are accurate. I feel bad especially cutting ties or pretending I didn't met them and they didn't exist in my life with people who hurt me, but it was my way, our way to heal ourselves. Once you've hurt us, don't expect us to treat you the same way again, even after apologizing. You gave us the scissors to cut our ties. To my fellow INFJ, don't feel bad about yourselves, don't think no one understands you, I'm here, we're here. We got each other's backs. Cheer up ❤
I can certainly relate to that sense of ego confusion. I'm still trying to figure that stuff out lmao. I need to stop allowing getting myself in with certain people without working on some of my blindspots gone too far ignored.
omg I also had the thought that I might have multiple personality disorder too. It was crazy reading your comments because I can relate so much. Maybe the reason why we thought of multiple personality disorder is because of #4.moodiness according to the video.
I'm an INFJ so I hide my emotions a lot... my little brother is extremely outgoing and not afraid to scream at my parents, grandparents, and me if we do something wrong. My parents say that he has "bigger" feelings than me, simply because he expresses them more.
I also have outgoing and not-afraid-to-say-things type of siblings. But when it comes to the 'real talks' and reality checks, I'm the one who's not afraid to say the facts, especially the hurtful ones. I was afraid to do that before, but once they knew my insights are for the better, my family consider my opinions on things now, especially family-matters.
As an INFJ , I can relate to everything said in this video. It is me to a tee , now I have a better understanding of why I do certain things and hopefully I can learn to be a more forgiving to myself and others.
