The Handmaids Tale Season 5 Episode 6 Esther Tells Aunt Lydia She was raped, she is pregnant 

I feel like June was the only person who ever made Esther feel like it’s ok to be angry.

I cried at this scene. She was only a child when this began, and still is. Now she’s pregnant with a child she doesn’t want. Who they will keep her a live, and give away once the baby is born. I felt her scream, since she can’t escape or leave. She’s going through so much pain, and the only time she felt protected was when June was with her.

The reason Lydia is so upset in this scene is because Esther was right...She did know. She knew what the men were doing to the handmaids all along, and she let it happen. She knew that handmaids who told people in the past that they were raped were blamed for it. Beaten, mutilated, hanged. It was NEVER the commander's fault. And Lydia did nothing. She doesn't know how to deal with her own guilt.

She's not wrong. Lydia's not sorry...and she has the audacity to apologize and look shocked. She knows damn well what is being done to the girls she claims to love and care for, her so called "precious girls"...ignoring their pain, their cries, but at least in this room she was stuck for a moment and witnessed it. I hope those screams stay lodged inside her head, and there's plenty more silent screams like that. We've seen her..."private" breakdowns, but until she does something about it or acts, I'll never believe that she is sorry. Getting Janine a damn eye-patch to help make up for the eye, she took out is not even an apology.

"Did you behave in a way that might have, even unwittingly, invited his attention?" No, Lydia. You left an already traumatized 14 year old girl alone in a room with a man who you knew was a rapist. She was covered from head to toe, and you left her alone with him with the intention of eventually turning her into his concubine. You knew that he'd driven Jeanine to suicide, almost to the point she was about to jump off a bridge with her daughter in her arms. No sympathy and this is one character who is so brillianty frustrating that I hate her more than Serena.

If she was in Texas right now she would be forced to keep the baby, even though she's just a child herself. And people say the handmaids tale is unrealistic.

McKenna Grace is incredibly talented. I’m everything she does. I hope she’s protected. Especially since we are hearing about so many child stars being taken advantage of.

My boyfriend laugh choked on his beer when aunt Lydia said that’s terrible and said “that’s rich”. I didn’t even think he was paying attention to the series at all

Aunt Lydia was angry with Esther for what she did to Janine but after she realized that the Handmaids were also being used for lust. she is now focused on making amends

I've never watched this show, but holy crap is this intense. I didn't think McKenna was capable of those screams or F-bombs. I might have to start watching this show now.

But Lydia can't be that naive to think this us the 1st time

It's a good juxtaposition to the first season to when they had a blame circle for Jane, when she admitted she was raped preGiled

It's hard to believe that aunt Lydia, who had a life before Gilead, could not understand that men don't always have good intentions in the best of circumstances. The ceremony is just wack-a-doodle! To have the wife cradle the handmaid between her legs as her husband does a weird missionary (?) thing with another person, is just crazy. Add to that Jezebels, it's no wonder the birth rate dropped! How many men with low sperm counts and have sex as many times as intimated, no wonder it took Serena to abstain from sex which made his sperm more potent and then get pregnant!

I very much enjoyed the scene where Putnam got a bloody unibrow as punishment for this act

And the Emmy goes to…this is a masterclass of acting

This is what happens to women in Georgia. Its fjcking disgusting that people actually think this sh is ok and believe they have the right to force pregnancy.

ann dowd is such an amazing actress. aunt lydia is a psychologically complex character. i think deep down she actually does love them in a twisted way but knows whats at stake if she mishandles her job.

She's so conditioned that it's hard to hate her. She really believes that whatever she believes is right and moral. She's so delusional

the handmaid's tale is full of good actors omg

FYI, irl pregnancies are NOT dated from conception…medically, the start of a pregnancy is the first day of the moms last period, with conception at about the end of week 2 after that, with week 1 and 2 of the “pregnancy” being before it is even conceived. So…you can’t take a 4 week pregnancy and say conception was 4 weeks ago….it was actually about 2 weeks prior. In this case, if the same in Gilead,a 3 week pregnancy would be conceived about a week before, and would be hard to detect visually.

Mckenna Grace is SO talented but her playing this role worries me the subject matter is very strong and even playing the part can be traumatizing.

Lydia used to believe her own lies, but now she doesnt

Coming from Aunt Lydia this is actually progress.

I know it's acting but that was hard to watch, at the same time I couldn't look away.

This brought me back to my furry at confirming I had been drugged and sexually assaulted. A voodoo doll is still too good for he who I don’t name.

Idk know how final season ends. I’m already wanting a movie

I cant wait for this show to end so i can see them beating Aunt Lydia’s head into the concrete

Why this scene is so sad, Lydia still don't get it. 😢

Aunt Lydia is a royal C.

Why resort to fiction, when it is possible to find and fight such atrocities elsewhere around the globe?

this episode was fking intense , so much going on

Asking a rape victim if there was anything they did to invite the attention is beyond disgusting.

"there is nothing to be ashamed of" big turn from the early Lydia filling them with shame. I believe this is her turning point that leads her to the Lydia in The Testaments

McKenna Grace is such an incredible actor for such a young age. Amazing. I am also enjoying how the writers are playing out Lydia's character development.

Lydia is hands down the best character on the show and a complete scene stealer. The way she’s able to compartmentalize the horrors of Gilead is mind blowing. For example, as long as the rape (which she would never call it) happens during the “ceremony “, then it’s ordained by God and is righteous. But if it happens out of list, then that’s punishable by death. The way she’s able to shift gears emotionally when it comes to the fact that it’s all rape, no matter how you paint it, is incredible.

This is a different reaction than I was expecting from Aunt Lydia. I really thought she would slap Esther or punish her for using the word rape, I think Lydia is becoming more human

That’s a trauma scream. 😢 very good acting. I felt that.

That is exactly how lawyers used to say about rape victims. It was our fault

For any woman thats experienced rape, you know this is the exact feeling we felt inside when we had the weight of our rapist on top of us, unable to move, almost like we are handcuffed or glued in place, and youre screaming inside just like this, at the despair of having no power, no control, no escape. I cried badly after watching this scene because it took me right back. I remember saying "oh god no, please don't do this, I don't want to, please don't do this to me" but he wouldn't listen. It didn't matter how much I struggled or begged "please no" , he didn't care and he wasn't sorry. He didn't heed a word I said, EVEN after he had entered me and i gave him the chance to stop. It was at that point I knew nothing i did or said would stop this rape and that I would just have to close myself off and endure it, but inside I was exactly like this. Screaming in panic and despair. No woman truly recovers from her rape, we simply learn to live with what happened, but our trust in people and humanity completely goes. 😢

This is Aunt Lydia finally realizing what she’s done. Her role as an Aunt and handler of the handmaids was just a way to mask her insecurity with self righteousness. Though her actions were deeply abusive and manipulative, from what we’ve seen from her past I think deep down she feels a responsibility and even maternal feelings for those handmaids as a former childrens school teacher. Her close bond with Janine widened her perspective on the pain that the handmaids are put through and it makes sense that the thing that would snap her back to reality is to see a child go through that same torture.

Give her the damn Oscar! Holy shit that was raw! Her and Lydia deserve Oscars

I was not expecting this and it made the truffle scene from episode 2 even more creepier

This scene was so disturbing to me on so many levels, but mostly bc I had a breakdown like this when I was 10. I was being physically and emotionally abused by my father and step mother, and like these women, I was literally afraid for my life if anybody found out. And of course someone eventually did, and I had several fits where I screamed and thrashed and punched things until my fingers almost broke. I can only watch 1 or 2 episodes at a time and then I have to stop for several months or I just get in to dark a place.

I don't know what shocked me more about this scene: Ester finding out she was pregnant or the fact that Lydia said "I'm sorry."

Really shows that even if they think they're safe, as soon as one of the commanders' wives is confirmed fertile, they lose the fragile protection they cling. It happened to Esther, now Serena Joy.

Aunt Lydia, you do realize the "ceremonies" are the same thing right? Do any Aunt Lydia fans in the comments remember that?

HOW CAN ANY CHILD BEHAVE UNWITTINGLY AGAINST HORRIFIC EVIL???!!!

I was disappointed to not see more of Esther this season. I heard McKenna Grace, who plays Esther, had to have spinal surgery and that's why she wasn't seen in more episodes. I hope to see her next season.

Sad to think of the parallels between Esther and Eden (from earlier on) both are barely teenagers going through adult problems in Gilead. Though quite opposite (Esther with her disdain for Gilead’s ways and Eden with her blind faith and optimism) both were just girls at heart, who hoped for some semblance of normalcy. They wanted to feel safe and protected and most importantly loved. Though Eden was being conditioned into her new life as a child bride, she still had a family who cared for her (seen at her execution) vs Esther who was brought up in Gilead by a man whom she was forced to marry and be raped by his friends/cohorts regularly. While one grew hope the other grew resentment. Eden’s path showed what faith and trust in the system gets you in Gilead, while Esther shows us what you get when you put up a fight. Remember, right before Aunt Lydia approaches Esther sympathetically, she is shown slapping her unconscious face, and mere moments before seeing her in this scene she is asking Esther’s doctor why her _uterus harvesting_ procedure was halted… While Eden wouldn’t have been alive after drowning, I wonder why they didn’t consider doing this procedure for her before her execution… If they truly believed in their cause, they would exercise every option to further advance the population, especially before lawfully killing a fertile bride…

This season has definitely revived the show

This scene broke my heart. The actors who play Lydia and Esther are PHENOMENAL! Notice how when Lydia questions Esther, she is hesitant because she knows. She already knows Putnam raped her, but she words it in a way where the Commander wasn’t at fault. You can see on her face she wants to ask her if Putnam raped her, but she stops herself. She’s conflicted between her emotions and her “faith”. My heart breaks for Esther more. She was married to a much older man, who gave her to others to be raped in order to get pregnant because her husband couldn’t. She finds hope in June just to have it taken away from her, forced to become a Handmaid and right back into being raped. I’m wondering what they’re going to do with her character this coming season. And I’m wondering if Gilead would allow her to get rid of the child, since she got pregnant out of the ceremony, and she’s not “assigned”.

I don’t think I’ve ever met a character as hurt as Esther.

I thought Aunt Lydia finally has the character arc that we anticipated since S1 but remembered that she only considers this as rape because it happened before Esther's posting. She sees whatever they do to "her girls" after the posting "sacred ceremonies" when they are literally also rape. Yes she might seem to care about the girls but fundamentally all she cares about is whether or not they can be birthing vessels for their extreme religious beliefs

This was a big shocker.

Dear God my heart is just breaking for Esther! I feel like she never should have made that move in attempting to poison herself and Janine to death but I get that Esther's absolutely been through it and has been so messed up. 😭 Also, I definetly don't hate Aunt Lydia in the way I used to before discovering more of the truth. She did terrible things, yes, but she will also prove valuable in bringing this corrupt regime down from the inside. Just wait for it. That's what I'm doing now.

Aunt Lydia is one of my favorite characters, not for her actions but for how she is portrayed. She had several turning points during the series; they were all brief, and sometimes, they turned her back on track to be one of Gilead's "loyal" servants (like when she was almost killed by Emily). She clearly understands that not everything Gilead is doing is good, even in their world, but with the actions of her girls, she always dismisses it as justified. Handmaids were sinful women, and their only redeemable characteristics were that they were still able to bear children. If any other handmaid said she got raped by one of the commanders or if this happened earlier in the series, she would excuse it as "she leads him on," etc. But here is a 14 years old girl whose only "sin" was that her elderly husband died. Esther was a respected wife and only a teenager, so even aunt Lydia understands that she did nothing but be present. Lydia DOES care for "her girls," but she can only show it in the way Gilead allows her. Knowing your place, not stepping out of line, and bearing children is the only way to have a somewhat "easy" life in Gilead, and it is the only way to stay alive in hindsight. She couldn't do much more even if she wanted to, but she is slowly getting to a point where she sees more evilness on the side she is initially supporting. She is complex and definitely not all evil like some people think she is, and she definitely cares more about her girls than everyone believes.

Knowing the helplessness and rage and hopelessness she feels after failing to kill herself and being stuck now in this horrible condition...I mean, it's just unthinkable. It's alarming to me to realize that my right to end my life is actually a privilege. I take that autonomy for granted until I see things like this.

And people vote for senators that say it’s still the woman’s fault.

What an incredible actors and actresses they are, in The Handmaid’s Tale! All of them. Nothing but admiration.

Didn't Lydia tell Janine in season 1 that when she was raped in the past it was her fault?

I think Aunt Lydia from the tv show is going to be different frome the Testaments. Here she will turn against Gilead for the lack of respect they have for women. She is realizing that Gilead wasn't about children and babies, but just a lot of men that want to control everything in the sickest way. I think I like this option better than the one that was written in the book.

What absolutely fantastic acting by Mckenna Grace

This is Gilead, not normal society. It is almost impossible for anyone to perceive actual rape as rape, because that is what the system is built on. It may be an offensive question, but Esther is the first to even admit that rape happened ( except in season 1 when the girls stoned to death a lowly man who allegedly raped a servant girl, however since Lydia tells what the man did, it may have been a lie).

"GET OUT!!!" I don't really think she meant Lydia.

mckenna grace is an amazing actress. i cannot wait to see more of her in season 6! i hope esther gets peace, poor child, i feel so horrible watching her go through all of this. the handmaids tale is one of my most favorite shows. i love it so much.

Aunt Lydia is painfully naive.

lydia is pretending to blame everything on her supposed ignorance on the subject lol but she KNOWS like esther says. she always knew. lawrence tells her too, you already knew.

My heart breaks over and over for Esther. Somebody get her out of there! 🥺

This is chilling. We are too close to this kind of scenario being our reality. Too many self-righteous strangers want to decide how the American people should live their lives. Their version of a "perfect" country, for All of us... would be a perfect nightmare.

This seems a bit hollow to me. Aunt Lydia is just now realizing the commanders don’t have the best intentions?

Seeing her reaction when Aunt Lydia touched her… It rips my fucking heart and wrenches my gut.

I am shocked the Esther is pregnant I hope she survives the birth she is going to be 15 years old soon I hope she doesn't have a stillborn baby because it is not her fault they expect more kids just to have more and more power Gilead without a care to the handmaid's health and wellness and mental health

Believe it or not - McKenna Grace's back must hurt for carrying this show on her own

Wow. What an incredible actress. McKenna is 16 irl! That scream hit me like a train. I screamed like that when I was going through postpartum psychosis & severe PPD. I screamed blue murder from all the pain inside my head. Now that is talent.

This was SUCH an amazing scene

I really hate aunt Lydia, she said she wants to be more compassionate with the handmaids, but even if she tries, it is impossible in a place like Gilead.

I don't know when aunt Lydia, will open her eyes. does she not get that she literally facilitates young women for these commanders to rape? I mean the whole ceremony thing, its just like a "show". Such a powerful scene.

Aunt Lydia is my favorite character. I think she will be one of many who will turn it all around in the end.

This is one of that rare moments when aunt Lydia really cares for the handmsid's wellness. She always intrigantes me because is estricted and brutal. By the other hand she has this shining moments of compassion and empaty. Baffling,...

I wonder pro lifers react if their loved ones were victims of sa

Its a heavy charge to blame anyone in Gilead for that crime,especially a commander but then,the whole apparatus is built on this premise.

Aunt Lydia has more faith than the commanders. The commanders are really power hungry

Poor Esther - she is literally a child and she has gone through all this.

The acting is absolutely incredible

omfg did Lydia really just try to find a way to blame the victim? This child??

What do you think the ceremonies are aunt Lydia

I hope she becomes free, and can get to Canada. And never have to bear that fetus.

"Even unwittingly" makes that whole interrogation redudant because how can you confess to a behaviour you don't know you were emitting, just insinuating blame on the victim in a loophole way

I wonder what will happen with this. When the baby is born who will the baby go to? Ester is done, she's cuffed to the bed so once the baby is born, she'll be killed so who gets the baby?

one of the satisfying deaths of television history, commander putnum

i find it funny how one minute shes playing paige on young sheldon next minute shes ester on the handmaids tale

MCKENNA GRACE! She is one of the best child actors and actors PERIOD right now! She is so talented!

Is this the beginning of the Lydia of The Testaments?

I don’t care that Lydia has been trying to right her wrongs. I want her to get what’s been coming to her

It was here Aunt Lydia asked herself, in the words of Mitchell and Webb, “are we the baddies?”

As much as I not a fan of ester as she poised Janine…my heart breaks for her…we all know the handmaids are raped & unfortunately it’s still happening to women…the actresses in this show are amazing…I hope to see more scenes with Ester & Aunt Lydia

Plot twist: Aunt Lydia is actually always compassionate because she is the mole for Mayday the whole time

Ohhh I can't WAIT to see the things that link the final season of Handmaid's Tale with the sequel "The Testaments," and especially The Testaments in full, in regards to Aunt Lydia. This whole entire time, Lydia has been the secret MVP.

What they go do now I hope they excite the commander that did this ie Putnam and I hope Lawerence or nick does it

In the Testaments book, Aunt Lydia helps to take down Gilead