Well... I think that's the big plot twist on this. Because acting/pretending/imagining is the thing a brain cannot see different from reality. I think it is very inspiring that a clinically diagnosed psychopath, who doesn't know, and doesn't show signs of it because of conditioning due to a religious upbringing, is like: I don't want to be a psychopath... So i will act like i care to maybe change my brain... But for all we know he's killing people now 😂
To me that's the most generous thing a person like him can do: He's incapable of feeling empathy, yet he's able to put up with it and act like it superficially because it makes the people around him feel comfortable. It shows a special quality to this person, and even if it might be self-serving in certain ways, it's ultimately a selfless act
@@YehudiNimol He said that his relatives think he's not a good person to be around, they don't get emotional contact with him. Those with whom he's in contact on a superficial [great guy at a party] or non-social [work and education] level are comfortable with him because they're not trying to make emotional contact with him. This is what I understood him to say.
I remember gushing to a surgeon once for saving my life, he looked at me like I was something he had just scraped off his shoe, I still love that guy though 🥰
I have observed psycopathy in surgeon's as well. They have the advantage of not being squeamish while working on people the type of detachment they have is unparalleled. They seem to be well disciplined as well which obviously helps surgeons.
@@PROTAGONIST_48 Healthcare is pay to play. I have a friend that teaches at a medical school from what I understand less people are going into Healthcare because they care about people and more people are going it into it because their parents force them and because they want to make money that seems Psychopathic to me. I have no desire to argue with you I understand that the percentage of psychopaths is low. But it is very naive to think that there are no Psychopaths. So basically I agree with you have a great day. What do you call it when you try to talk to an oncologist but they tell you you have to come in for an appointment? That's what happened to me and oncologist was so high and mighty they wouldn't talk to me for 5 minutes to assuage some of my concerns so I cured my own cancer. I guess I'm desensitized to the belief that they are gods...😚
I was at a Mental Health conference back in July where a renown researcher told the story of Mr Fallon. He further estimated that it may not only take the abnormal brain structure of a psychopath to make a destructive person, it also may require bad nurture in childhood. He estimated that Mr Fallon did not become a destructive person because of relatively good nurture in childhood. Amazing to hear his own take.
This makes simple sense but not the only factors involved. Traumatic experiences can set the trigger off. Bad parenting is just one way of setting that trigger off. Head injuries, bad relationships, being bullied and many other experiences are equally as important. It's all to do with brain trauma I believe. Physical or mental. I feel, though have never been tested. That I am a full blown psychopath. But a loving upbringing has help shelter me from my true self. But I am definately not connected. But I do my best to meet people in the middle so to speak.
I am no psychologist, but I’ve always been very interested in certain aspects of brain science and psychology. I trained as a research technologist in the Biological Sciences and then when my twins were born, I worked part time with a Positive Parenting Program, as a child care worker and then as a parent facilitator. I’ve worked closely with hundreds of young children, in the newborn to six year old age group, which featured lots of unstructured play time, song, rhyme, art and simple food preparation time, and I have also raised my own twin sons ( with bountiful help from my husband), so I have a little experience with early childhood behaviour. I have always had a firm but fair style of dealing with people including children, and I found that I was very good at helping people and children learn how to act or play fairly and respectfully with one another, but sometimes, with some children, it was real work! I can’t think of too many times ( only one example really) where an oppositional, defiant, young child didn’t come around to consistently trying the tactics that I would model for them and use it successfully. It was generally extremely rewarding work but at times it required real patience and the belief that my system would eventually work, which it usually did, at least in our program setting. The parents were also taught these skills and practices. I have often wondered, as a side thought, if this kind of early, positive type of intervention, in a potential young sociopath or psychopath could possibly have turned them around enough and helped shape them into being more successful and productive people in life and in society, like what has appeared to have happened with Dr. Fallon, due to the excellent parenting that he seems to have received. It makes sense that it could very well do that or at least help to a significant degree, especially if their first teachers ( their parents or main caregiver) were able to bond with them and teach them these valuable, cooperative, social skills.
Yeah, I think that’s been well known considering there are estimated to be numerous people with anti-social disorders in high levels of large corporations and government, presidents even.
It definitely depends on partly nurture, because obviously what you're teaching the clinical psychopath is to boil everything down to "winning" and having power and control over others so they don't hurt you when they have power and control over you. I mean there are actually really malignant psychopaths that do come from pretty normal or privileged backgrounds too, it's just the really violent ones do tend coming from backgrounds of violence and/or substance abuse and poverty. Which, to be fair, is the mix that generally creates much more angry violent people in general that are prone to finding difficulty with being happy, normal, friendly, cheerful people in adulthood regardless if they want to anyway even if they have normal brain structures. So it becomes about force multipliers and self awareness. Also you will notice key word "self awareness." People with a general poverty of accurate self-appraisal aren't good at a number of things in life. Scientists by basic definition are trending toward hyper awareness and cold, calm, reflective analysis and curiosity so they probably would tend to be among the absolute best at keeping themselves from being destructive and understanding themselves and their own motivations and therefore crimping any of the worst tendencies.
it's essential to a surgeon to develop some "skills" of psychopaths, such as lack of empathy (while working). There's a real interesting buch about that The Wisdom os Psychopaths by Kevin Dutton.
@@alexanderdecarvalho3731 yes. They may even develop Alexithymia. They have to go on to the next person and pretend like that 2 year old didn't just die in the back.
@@AmbivalentAlexthymic You're both right, it's being able to "Turn it on and off" when needed. You want them to be warm and jovial and joking with you when you're resting in your room watching TV and they come by to see how you're doing and let you know how your blood work looked, and then want them focused with ice water in their veins and being in the clutch when they're holding the scalpel.
I remember listening to him lecture about this before, and mentioning a specific instance where he was investigating a deadly virus that he believed was contracted in a bat cave. He didn't tell his brother that they were at risk because he thought it would be fun to spelunk, but didn't tell his brother that the reason no one was visiting the cave and/or there were dead animals nearby was because it carried deadly contagion. He never told his brother that if he touched the floors, that he would contract Marburg virus and die bleeding from all his orifices. They enjoyed the caves. After his brother found out, their relationship changed. He may think he's a good guy based on his religious framework, but there are probably a lot of situations like this one that outline how dangerous he is as a companion. I would love to study this man.
There are more psychopaths out there then generally believed, you probly know one or two. That guy who's totally oblivious to your reactions to something or your opinion in general without even being conscious of it for instance
I just try to _appreciate_ the fact that if Dr. Fallon didn't rip my head off it's because he wouldn't regard it as a particularly interesting endeavor.
I saw a video where people who knew him called him out on stage for some of his “fun” stories and told the truth behind what happened. They also reminded him of other dangerous and thoughtless things he did with, say, his kids. He had trouble seeing what the problem was. He’s not a good guy. Don’t believe psychopaths’ self-assessments. That’s basic. We all know it, but when we’re faced with a cuddly TED talk, too many people decide to forget.
@@mrjones2721 You're right, but I wouldn't agree with calling him a bad person. It depends on your definition of bad, of course. If the argument is about semantics without explanation it's pointless, so I'll give my definition. To me, a bad person is someone who commits cruel acts with full knowledge and apprehension of the pain they inflict. However, the concept of good and bad is a human social construct. Nature, nurture and genetics aren't "good or bad" they just "are". They are neutral agents. The brains of psychopaths, such as dr. Fallon's are lacking in the parts that give humans understanding and grasp of the pain they might inflict on others. Fallon doesn't understand other people's feelings because he's not capable of it. As such, he hasn't got a clue of the pain he inflicts, nor does he have personal experience of any pain of that nature. Aside from reading a literal definition of the words, psychopaths are unable to understand cruelty or empathy, and are therefore capable of committing cruel acts without any qualms, such as the cave example. Why wouldn't they? They aren't hindered by empathy, so it's only logical for them to want to maximize their own pleasure. It's certainly not pleasant for neurotypicals to experience, and I'm not saying actions such as Fallon's are morally justified, but in my view it doesn't make him a bad person, it's just how his brain works.
Fascinating. There seem to be so many varied dimensions to the human psyche that we gloss over in our panic to find a "simple answer". Psychopathology is probably a spectrum, and most certainly a basket of sub-components. It would take a huge amount of self-awareness and self-control, but it appears that some psychopaths can control it and adapt to what part of the world they can perceive. I saw an interview of a diagnosed psychopath who was crystal-clear on a few points: he spoke because he had nothing to gain or lose, his perception of the human world was peripheral at most but he did comprehend there were entities (other human beings) "out there", he knew pain and did not wish it on another being, and he understood the pain he could cause would probably be because of inattentiveness or negligence on his part. His answer was to focus, very hard, on the human world at the edges of his comprehension, following what clues he could gather through information sometimes gained second-hand. He was clearly very intelligent, but he described his existence almost like a 'brain in a jar' experience. I couldn't comprehend a lot of what he said, but I'm glad I listened.
@friskeysunset I'd be fascinated to listen. Do you have more information, such that allows for a productive search for this interview? Thanks in advance.
@@Skelterbane69 An excellent guide is simply the awareness that in many ways others are very much like yourself: Averse to pain, interested in pleasure, seeking constructive family relationships, and more completely seeking friendship, love, meaningful work.... The Golden Rule oversimplifies matters but 'treating others as you would like to be treated' has its root in acknowledging how alike humans are, and that we are kin to each other not just genetically but emotionally and morally.
I teared up a little with that closing bit. Not compelled or even encouraged by his emotions and yet James Fallon chooses to care. Academics argue endlessly about the reality of free will and whether we are all just a product of nature and nurture, but IMHO this is a practical example.
He doesn't "care". It is strictly an academic exercise to see if it optimizes his relations with people so he can more easily manipulate them as he sees fit. This is the entire basis of psychopathy - there is zero connection inter-personally.
Being a psychopath and being a serial killer are two different things. It depends not only of your genes, but also the enviroment. Maybe he was raised in a good structured family. Besides the story he told, he maybe didn't commited anything worse (like murder itself as he did a lot of harmful things) because of that. He grew up and ended up doing a good job to the society. He locked himself in this job, maybe that brought good emotions to himself, and that kind of pleasure he can still feel. And now i learned one more thing about this kind of brain: They might not always be aware they have this issue. I really didn't know that. That's amazing. I know he doesn't care and he maybe this time wasn't trying to manipulate, but telling his story to the public made him feel awesome. He doesn't have emotional empathy, but i found very interesting that he has the acknowledgment that his relatives thinks he is not a good person to be around.
After reading this comment i think you are complete confused about the reactions of stimuli tht psychopaths experience and the empathy they attach to others.
@@akumaquik Like he said, he don't have emotional empathy, but cognitive empathy. What i said was what i learned. But of course, i would like ro read your thoughts as i'm not a specialist of course.
I don't think it is self awareness. He is a scientist, discovered something interesting about himself, didn't feel anything, developed a theory, shared it to promote study, enjoys acknowledgement. ....locked himself in job because he is a zombie with no emotion, good for a person who has a career to stay in their wheelhouse....
@@PunkerVogt Nope he doesn't. No disrespect to him but that's the whole point about psychopathy in medical terms. He chose to be a good person because it serves him well. He chose to admit it because it serves him well. Most of the decisions we make are influenced by society or people around us. He is simply incapable of comprehending what we feel.
I remember some time after the 2008 housing bubble burst and the resulting Great Recession I watched a documentary called, "I Am Fishhead" narrated by Peter Coyote. The gist of the documentary is that it was discovered that many of the CEOs who ran these companies that went belly up by being overly adventurous with their company's investment risk factors were found to be psychopaths. And I believe half way through it James came onto the screen and told this story, and at the time he attributed his 'normal' business life to being reared by great parents.
Welcome to the comment section where this dumbass makes completely satire comments to gain small hits of dopamine over an extended peroid of time because they themselves feel empty and without depth on the inside
As far as psychopaths go, Fallon is a success story. I’ve no doubt he’s fallen short in his interpersonal relationships, and that he doesn’t feel regret, but that’s the very definition of a psychopath. He’s also been governed by the moral code he was taught growing up, and has become a socially normal, responsible, and successful member of society. Demonizing Psychopaths as a group is blaming a person for something they have no control over, AND treating them as irredeemable mutants who aren’t worth the effort and expense to treat, despite evidence that they can function normally when given the proper environment to develop.
He says himself that every person that knew him, that he asked, said that he wasn’t NORMAL. Holding down a research job and doing TED talks is not a sign of normality, nor does it mean that he hasn’t hurt people. I have narcissistic parents (that’s way lower on the scale than James Fallon) and they are hurtful every time they open their mouths, because every communication is self-centred. This guy has a wife, children, grandchildren and yet he enjoys getting audience laughs out of how selfish he has been. God only knows what he is like as a boss if he has no empathy - I can just hear him saying to his secretary “no you can’t go early because your husband has been in a car crash and is on life support, because how does that help me make my research deadline?” Falling short in interpersonal relationships, as you like to put it, isn’t a mild problem. It is THE problem of human existence, and the one that will probably kill us as a species because we can’t live within nature whilst most countries are ruled by these human mimickers called Psychopaths who might as well be aliens.
@@andrewhaywood3853 I think it’s fair to say that you’re exceedingly attuned to cluster B behavior regarding your personal experience. But projecting your personal experience on to every psychopath is way too reactionary. I never said the guy is easy to live with. I said psychopaths can, and often do integrate relatively normally into society, despite their affliction. I also have a very good friend, and former brother in law who has NPD. His is the vulnerable type, but it took a toll on my sister and their two sons. Which is why he’s my former brother in law, but still my friend. He’s learned. He’s not “cured” of it, but he’s adopted a very different approach to his life. One which would’ve saved his marriage had he adopted it 20 years ago.
@@orphanrafferty1955 I have no idea what a psychopath is? Don’t make silly statements you can’t back up. You have no idea what I know. You simply assume every psychopath is evil incarnate because of your personal experience. Perhaps all psychopaths should be burned at the stake since they’re so clearly irredeemable in your eyes.
@Madolite Lol. “tactically unwise action…” Exactly! Classical conditioning! Learning behavior is mostly conditioning anyway. A psychopath is slower on the uptake learning proper social conduct because they’re neurologically retarded in that area of comprehension, but they can learn to mimic, and with our increasing understanding of neural plasticity, perhaps can even learn to have feelings more like neurotypical people.
Humanity is way more complex and nuanced than most or any of us realize. Dating and loving someone who was hyper functional who shared that they had been diagnosed with numerous mental health issues really made me put the brakes on being judgmental towards anyone, even myself.
@@paulduffy4585actually they’re helpful in some ways. For example, I couldn’t begin getting my life back until I could label what I wanted to understand and overcome.
@@canobenitez Let me rephrase, definitive statements are usually not helpful. Whereas labels can be helpful at times, even though they run the risk of oversimplifying matters.
I would love to watch an in-depth conversation between this guy and renowned narcissist and psychologist Sam Vaknin. The nature vs. nurture debate is never-ending, and endlessly fascinating.
Sam Vaknin readily says that ASPD is a physically difference in the brain and think that it should be removed from the cluster B section because of that stark difference
I knew three boys who may have been psychopaths, when I was growing up. One thing I noticed about them was that they had no real emotions. They never showed anger, impatience, disappointment, disgust, or irritation. They also had a disdain for anyone else being angry, sad, impatient, etc. It seemed that when other people showed emotion it brought out their worst ways.
That bit about realising that you are a psychopath and not caring, kinda proved it, really struck a chord with me. I was on a course about autism and realised I’m autistic, so I went home and read everything I could find about autism, which kinda proved it!
Patrick C., I had to watch it again to see what you were talking about. You're totally right! The quick little raise of the eyebrows with the closed-lip grin, and then leaving the stage before the applause even ended its crescendo. He seriously had NO NEED to bask in any of the approbation. But the FIRST time I watched, I was pretty sure he was getting choked up at the end. Like he KNEW the gravity of what he was saying. Even though I fully agree with your assessment, I also think he DOES care deeply about something important, even if it's not words of approval from another human.
@@CrabbyO Sociopaths are self-centered. I feel bad for anyone like that because they can't feel empathy naturally. It's a mental disease, sometimes coming from brain-damage even.
Until very recently I was not even aware psychopaths may _themselves_ look for help of mental health professionals, yet some of them do, as while it feels fantastic to do whatever you want without sense of guilt, never getting depression due to lack of conscience, being able to play people, having no fear etc, however what pisses them off is how the nice life they seem to finally built for them crumbles again and again, because they fail at building lasting relationships. And failure is not what they wish for themselves. Besides then they discover, that they are insanely shallow emotionally, they do feel joy, anger, and... and... well, that sort of it, besides sensations like hunger, freezing or sweating.
Something I recently realized is that personality disorders are also on a spectrum. I had trouble understanding if a relative was a narcissist until I realized they are probably on a spectrum and just not as bad as some narcs.
I've made a mistake of buying his book, thinking it would give me some scientific insights into mind of a psychopath, turns out its few hundred pages of him bragging about some nonsense
Very interesting. Though I disagree that we need people with such traits as CEOs or soldiers. I’d rather wager a guess that we have the sort of social problems because people with such traits get a hold of a lot of power. Then of course you will have a mass exploitation and violent conflicts, that’s kind of expected if someone is not able to fully put themselves in another person’a shoes. So while it might be useful sometimes, I disagree that anyone who has it on autopilot should be just left unchecked or worse - praised for what they are doing.
Exactly. Speaking someone who strongly suspects that she is a psychopath, I wouldn’t trust Fallon’s words when he says the world needs psychopaths. Trying to convince others why they need us is a timeless sociopathic/psychopathic move. It’s self preservation.
Infact, there's not a single field of work or place in this society where these devils are needed. You don't need to be a vicious pos to perform surgery or to have responsibility. I bet those who say psychopaths are beneficial in any way at all are narcissistic, selfish assholes themselves looking for a way to justify their shitty behaviour. It is also a choice. NPD's and ASPD's knows what they're doing and they do the things they do because they love it.
Yes “profit over everything” is the cancer that is metastasizing through the world leaving misery and destruction in its wake. One can have a very valid suspicion that successful psychopaths helped created the conditions for this mentality.
It doesn't take empathy to know what is right and wrong. Psychopaths have less of an ego or a need to sooth with outside things like power. They get bored mostly.
@brownincel6018 it's not really. Plenty of people are without even knowing it. I mean if you dont feel guilt why should that stop you from doing the right thing ? If all that stops people from doing the wrong thing is because it makes them feel bad I'd question that persons inner compass
This guy is doing a lot of humanity. He's going where no one went before. We are privileged to listen to him, a "psychopath" by scan and his friends opinions, but also a brave pioneer for humanity in my opinion and I hope others.
You’ve got to consider the attention factor. It’s actually very not possible that his initial core incentive on going public was anything sincere; but rather based off the attention, popularity, & exposure he’d receive. Either way you’re right about him being revolutionary in ‘doing for humanity.’
His friends call him a sociopath...and he admits that he is NOT a psychopath, as his score on the PCL-R isn't high enough to qualify him for the diagnosis. These are spectrum disorders, so he's likely more of a narcissistic sociopath who happens to be non-violent, and incapable of caring for anyone close to him. He's more interested in NEW people he can charm and entertain, which is why he was voted Class Clown in high school. He calls himself the life of the party...he's performing for people...like a narcissist, and pathologically self-absorbed with his own party-lifestyle that he doesn't go to the wedding and funerals, because it's all about him being the life of the party. He's more narcissistic than psychopathic.
yeah dud i dont understand why people are saying this guy is a hero or that he is brave in any way, he said it himself he doesnt feel empathy and he pretends to feel that so he can co exist here, he doesnt pretend to feel empathy cuz he likes the people around him but because if he doesnt pretend to feel those emotions it would be his downfall
I think what I enjoy most about this is all his bundle of nerves before opening with that confession and you know cause of that title but he definitely has anxiety about it and that’s more emotion than most. I hope he teaches that genetics might not actually be so sound to lead on and so reliable. It’s also the fact that psychology is still a very subjective field and a lucrative business. What once was a science that evolved everyday is now kinda hard to wade through what’s solely for profit or agenda vs for the sake of science and someone’s wellbeing..
WOW! This just made me realize that my mother is a Social Psychopath. She's always exhibited the signs he says he has. It makes so much sense. Thanks James.
Give me a funny scientist to listen to ALL DAY. Loved the talk, we lost my husbands Dad to Alzheimer’s disease. He told me the following morning after an “episode”, he said that he felt like he was having a horrible nightmare and was watching himself act out, but was not able to control himself. I found that very interesting because we had never read or heard anything like that. I think that inflammation is definitely a factor in why he may have developed it.
I remember him from a television documentary a long time ago, telling the same story. Here he is, being dead serious, and the audience is perceiving it as standup comedy.
A result, unfortunately, of the populace bring 'dumbed down' by the media, government, etc.. they've been doing that since the beginning days of television.. 🤔
I've noticed that too. He was pretending to be fun and the audience swallow it. Psychopaths are charismatic. Fun to be around - has this guy said: when they are strangers. Ted Bundy got notorious for it.
Absolutely we need detached people but we dont need violent or cruel people! This man is funny funny funny! Charming and mesmerizing great speaker easy to losten to probably an excellent author!
I wonder what my PET scan would show. Except for one cool person and one I’m not fully convinced of, everyone else I’ve had a relationship with has been somewhere along the line of psychopathy and/or sociopathy. I wonder what it says about me. Or, is it that there are way more of ‘them’ out there than we know? 🤔
Without having people capable of violence you won't have anyone to protect you from dangerous threats. It's that simple, we need soldiers, cops, game wardens to be able to be violent to stop invading armies, criminals, wild animals from hurting our society.
@@NeoStoicism I agree, some people today seem to think life was always as it is today. In reality our concept of "normality" is just a footnote in the long, long history of our species. It took all kinds to get us where we are and there's no reason to believe that that doesn't apply to the future as well. What worries me is this thirst for "normalization". We must all be the same...
It's a matter of defining bravery but I have to agree. My fondness for Aristotle and my assumption that he isn't afraid to share his story led me to the same conclusion as you.
I’ve heard him tell this story before and it was totally different detail about how he found out. It seems lying without compunction is also a feature of psychopathy.
To show someone care is done because you have been shown care, and you understand how much it meant to have been treated with such care and how it changed you for the better. A sense of care and empathy is not an emotion that can be created, but one that occurs naturally. If do not want ourselves to suffer, and we feel a sense of love for ourselves, naturally that extends to other people, as we do not want to be alone in our feelings of any kind. No matter what someone is feeling, there is a natural desire to find out that others feel similarly or the same as you, because that validates our own experience.
This was so interesting! The thing about many mental illnesses or conditions is that genetics "load the gun" by giving you the genetics that could allow you to develop them, but the genes will not manifest unless there are triggers in your environment for it to happen. For example, not everyone with the genes that make them high-risk for schizophrenia will develop schizophrenia. It often happens after a stressful and painful childhood+adolescence or drug abuse that signal to the body to activate those genes for whatever reason.
I believe that the first thing you must do in order to understand yourself and become self aware is to accept the truth. The truth can be painful, and in some cases it may not even matter, but what it can do is open up the path to growth and self understanding. This way you can live your happiest life possible. Granted it may not make you a great person in history, but what it will do is bring you personal happiness and joy. I can tell you first hand that it is the true wealth in life. Acceptance above anything else, hard work to improve, and distance to achieve it; that is what I think this man needs, and I think he has it.
Fascinating. I often get the question about narcissists, why and what can we do. Unless someone wants to change, we can't do much. It can be helpful to consider it's genetic, it can be easier to move on. That helped me close the door on a relationship with a narcissist, when I viewed her as a "psychopath lite" - which was really quite accurate (yes, obsessed with "saving the world" while treating everyone like dirt).
@@adge4579 Seek out hobbies, social ones. Tennis, paddel, take a course in uni, join a dance club, etc. It'll rewire your brain. You're not literally empty, you've just deprived yourself of positive feelings. Do regular sports and regular walks, etc
@@adge4579 Seek out professional help. I'm a retired RN, I worked in psychiatry for some times. Your issues seem substantial, I may be wrong but I think that you need to speak to a professional. Good luck to you.
@@adge4579 you have to re-think your relationship with him and possibly need to develop a different type of relationship that will bring basic respect to you & him. From your years of living with him you have been conditioned to believe certain things and to react to things he does or says a certain way. You may need to learn to not react the way he has caused you to react in the past. In order to do this you have to watch out for "tactics" such as re-framing the conversation, arguing hypotheticals, changing the subject of or to hypotheticals, baiting you for a reaction, and "the dog whistle" which is saying something in front of others that sounds normal to those who are unaware of the personality disorder but can trigger you, making you look like the bad one. There's also the givens: deflection, gaslighting, blameshifting, playing the hero (for praise by you or others such as friends, family, neighbors), or the victim, and having a sense of entitlement believing that he should have been chosen for something by someone else that he shouldn't have. Once you can identify these behaviors you can then respond/react accordingly. The main thing you have to do is not give the reaction they are hoping for which is going to take you some time to learn to master, as well as putting space or limited contact in between you and him so you don't have to deal with the abuse or toxicity, all the while being loving, respectful, and available for your father. It takes time to develop the repositioning of yourself in the relationship but once you find the sweet spot you will be better off.
Really, I found it a tad frustrating at times. Like listening to someone stutter. I do like his comedic misdirection. Caught me off guard even tho I knew it was coming.
@@nathanbellamy3308 That's a false equivalent. Just because someone critiques doesn't make them a professional. Since when are we not allowed to critique???? Oh wait.
@@TomAHawk-lb8wk we could go round and round with your argument. I.e why can't I critique your critique etc ad nauseum. But at the end of the day your a modern day hater and troll under the guise of a genuine critique Get up there and show them how it's done pal.
@@TomAHawk-lb8wk It reminds me of Louis CK, superficially. Where Louis' delivery feels very rough, off-the-cuff, and "my world is crumbling", yet it's all choreographed.
Exactly, as Paul says. It goes a long way in many casual relationships and fun nights out, traveling etc. But those deep connections miss something, when empathy is not there. It is good to aknowledge how important it is, to both understand the psychopath (what he is missing out on, and how a relationship can be good for him), and in this case his family, who need to understand their dad and what they can get and not get (empathy, interest, humor) from being together with him
And actually, instead of 'missing out on' something, I like to see it as; that we all contribute with something, we all bring something to the world. Instead of comparing each other, we could just say that this man brings humor, joy, casual lifestyle, science ect. - His wife probably brings empathy, and they have found a way to live together, even though he might not understand that empathy on an emotional level. Sorry it got a little long
"When people tell you who they are, listen." Some of these sociopathic/narcissistic types like attention so much, or are so shallow that they'll reveal themselves with glee. When they do, take them at their word! Don't think 'well, they're harmless & self-aware." Also, learn to read people and note their actions. Because some of these creeps are too clever to just tell you who they are.
Good point. On a tangent, the way I heard it was, "When someone tells you who they are, take it wisely. When someone shows you who they are, believe them."
My housemate is such a person, and uses his act of "narcissistic-sociopathic-self absorbed" self-awareness to take people unawares, when it really comes down to it. Laughing and smiling with you, he will admit to being this way, and you may be inclined to believe (most are) that since he is just stating it so freely and openly, that he's understanding himself and taking measures to counter-balance these traits. But when you have been hurt by him, it is just "Well, I told you so...", and a smug grin.
I'm glad he's faking it now. It's his own way to say he cares about you, that he puts on this act for your comfort. I could live with someone who I knew was secretly cold, but rarely showed it, much better than someone who was cold all the time. Plus, the brain is plastic. You can train it. Like a muscle. By faking it until he makes it, he'll maximize whatever small scrap of empathy he has.
I don't think you can activate areas of the brain that are inactive due to genetic traits by mimicking the kind of behavior you'd exhibit if those areas has normal levels of activity.
It seems you don't understand what is wrong with psychopaths. They are emotionally cold, but that's not the worst part of them. They take greater risks, because negative/averse outcomes (e.g getting their finger cut) don't scare them. THUS, they will also put YOUR life in danger, and not care. And so if you die, they'll feel a slight loss, but after some months they'll find someone else.
@@paulh2981 Well, there is some truth in the value of psychopaths and sociopaths learning how to _emulate_ the emotions of the neuro-typical population -- for functionality's sake. Even better, if they can receive good therapy and learn the _personal benefits_ of fitting into society -- things running more smoothly for themselves and for society at large. They can also learn their differences, and why they behave the way they do. There are some high-functioning neuro-divergents out there.
@@alessiosandro123 I get narcissists just fine. Lord knows I've had enough of them in my life. A psychopathic narcissist like the speaker CAN care. It's just on an intellectual level instead of an emotional one. You sound like YOU don't get them, preferring demonization over understanding. Which is understandable. I'm downright allergic to people with NPD myself. They suck.
Violent or not, psychopaths still terrify me. The amount of manipulation and lack of empathy they embody can make them dangerous and unpredictable. But if they are able to recognise and control it for the greater good of society, like this man, kudos to them.
I've read books that have made a similar case for the utility of psychopaths. I can see the point. If your child is in need of brain surgery, for an extreme example, you want someone with absolutely cold, clinical detachment, a rock steady hand that will never once waver because of on whom they are working. If you've been falsely accused of a crime, you want a defense lawyer who will pursue any line of defence, no matter how distasteful you might find it. And I can see why and how many psychopaths have risen to lead corporations around the world. But, as we move towards more conscious capitalism, where the overriding duty of a CEO is no longer simply to make money for shareholders, I wonder if their time in particular might be over.
I agree. The perceived super material growth has become trite and proven not as fruitful to anyone other than the psychopaths leading the campaign as we estimated it would be. This was inevitable. The next step for growth and expansion of human kind’s success is clearly a deeper and more communal one, which psychopaths are demonstrably incapable of delivering. You’re right, we let them have the wheel because it seemed beneficial, but in reality they just took the opportunity to gorge themselves, what else would a psychopath do? The whole “but I’m a good, beneficial psychopath!” thing has long worn it’s welcome. It’s time to start growing and evolving towards the true human experience for the collective consciousness.
It's just another brain structure variant. I think it's wrong to call it "damaged" or "missing parts." All of living creatures are just evolved and evolving variants. What is successful, survives. What survives, reproduces and allows further evolution. There is so much variation in non-psychopath brains that to lump them together and call them "normal" is also a mistake.
@@ajasen When you put your life savings into a fund of stocks, your expectations are those of a narrowly selfish and foolishly entitled gambler. The social harm caused by unchecked amorality in the private sector far outpaces the (net) financial benefit conferred upon beneficiaries. As a world ecology, that sort of greed is a _tragedy of the commons,_ and thus, perhaps ironically here, I have no sympathy for such defectors who are willing to try to squeeze out more than they could ever rightfully earn. Go see if you can "make" your own money. Some of us actually think that dolphins have some value. Perhaps that's beyond your conceptual capacity though, if you're governed only by a desire to own more useless stuff.
People laugh and find this amusing, but I can bet anything his wife and kids don't find it funny at all. You cannot really understand the scope of this until you actually interact in a deep level with a psychopath/sociopath.
Might be true for the "controls", e.g. neurotypical people. But psychopaths deserve love, too. I mean, if they respect you at least a bit. I know what you are going to tell me, that psychopathy and respect do not work together, but it´s really all about the willingness of the given psychopath to loosen up a bit in his schemes - for you. You - as their partner - have to set boundaries and be firm about it. Tell them and show them you are not going to put up with their shit. I went through this, and I have to tell you, while the romance (if I can call it "romance" because it was so weirdly unemotional) did not last, I learned that not all psychopaths are the same. Some are better than others. He treated me right, he respected me because I understood and accepted him, and he was good to me but terrible to other people. The relationship ultimatelly sank like Titanic, though, as he was emotionally cold and could not connect with anybody. Interestingly, he opened me up after my previous partner who was "normal" but a completely hateful, hurtful person (he hated gays, lesbians, kids, animals, women, people of color... I could go on and on). Funnily enough, I expected the psychopath to be this hateful, not the neurotypical guy. The neurotypical guy nearly did me in.
Their nature is not to be hateful or evil, what they do is wear a mask appropriate for whoever they talk to so they can seem like great people and get what they want (whatever it is). So yes, you could say a psychopath could treat you better than a "normal" person, but as you already experienced, they only keep tricking you into feeling they are ok people until they find a new target. Do they deserve love? I think so, but love them in a non-romantic way, just know that they will absolutely destroy you and have no remorse whatsoever if you fall into their game (which is almost impossible to escape if you haven't already been with one).
Robin Mario I am not an expert, but 5 years of being with a psychopath and experiencing their traits and schemes, plus about three years of constant reading and research I think makes me a trustworthy resource since in the majority of cases they behave the exact same way regardless of race, gender and/or age.
Think about the same person but without a good moral upbringing and a strong scientific interest to keep him busy. If he was abused when young he could have turned out way different.
I remember this story from about a decade ago. Researchers also said that the brain chemistry plus a head injury and bad parenting all contributed to negative psychopathic behaviour (in several studies).
@@daryl9905 Definitely to the self but I could imagine if too many empathetic people were driven out of key jobs, those jobs may suffer and possibly the society as a result. I'd have no idea on the numbers but it'd be interesting to read a study on psychopaths in potentially trauma-inducing careers like paramedics or soldiers etc.
Empathy on it's own doesn't make money. CEO's can be empathetic, but only if it generates money, and i don't see problem in that, since economy is not a zero sum game. CEO's becoming rich doesn't make poor people more poor.
@@gava6636 It has in recent years though, with progressively more jobs becoming automated and the wealth divide growing wider as many of those jobs are no longer available and the majority of the money saved goes to the rich and not into the communities.
I’m a pro-social psychopath, diagnosed. My grandfather was a very successful man, and came from abstract poverty. His mother had 11 children and was a bootlegger and wild in her younger days, escaped from Arkansas and remade her life as an incredibly poor mother and farmers wife. So for generations my family has been reinventing themselves through years of mental health struggles and lack of empathy. I have a hard time keeping a job, but can get literally ANY job I want at the drop of a hat. I’m very social and hear often how kind and personal I am but I am not connected to anyone but my dad and my husband. It’s a complicated relationship with mental health, and definitely genetic.
For me, this man is a hero. In his own way. Because he has had the courage and inner strength to look at his own ugly side, see it for what it is and then make this curse into his blessing and share with the world his lessons that will help the future generations.
I think you may need to review your ‘101’ in psychopathism then. When a person is fearless by default, what would you say could constitute anything he does as being ‘courageous.’ His actions & decision to go public didn’t manifest out of a build up of achieved inner strength - they were calculations defaulted off nothing more than his own self-interest.
I for one think that empathy is a lost gift these days in many people who are absorbed in a me, me, me world that’s dictated to them by social media. Without empathy, our society will continue to decline. I’d love to hear what his family members have experienced! We as a society have to put our focus back on G0d and not worry about what other humans opinions of us are. We all are flawed and fall short, and realizing this and asking for G0d to help us is the first step. Kudos to him for sharing his story.
Something that feels quite telling to me that there is something emotionally 'off' about this guy is when he makes the off-hand quip about his wife at 5:26. "She thought she was gonna die of something else; she didn't; before she died of Alzheimer's". The way he presents that remark, feels mostly to make people laugh; with zero indication of something like grief, hurt or other neurotypical emotion people feel when talking about such a heavy experience.
We don't know her personality, or this man personally & we don't know the dynamics of their relationship. It's as likely as anything else that her parents were very old qhen they died of alzheimers so she pragmatically made a decision she'd probably die of something else first. Or perhaps she had an illness. Perhaps the family deals with grief by shutting it down or with dark humour. There an incredible amount of presumption in these comments.
I oddly relate to this guy. I do feel empathy but people call me cold because i dont like or care about hugs or compliments or birthdays. Maybe just pretending is the way to go
Thanks for giving this talk. It has been very hurtful seeing how everyone, including all mental health professionals, show complete hatred towards psychopaths.
@@ChocolateMilk.. What does that mean? Does that mean I deserve to be hated by everyone? I try my best to not be an asshole. But I cannot control myself no matter how much i try. Do i still deserve to be hated?
Kind of messed up that people in the comments are saying they're disgusted by him. Would you say you're disgusted by someone with autism? He was born this way. Not being able to socialize in the same way as a "normal" person does not mean you're disgusting. He has said he had a very loving upbringing and believes that's what saved him from going down a different path. Genetics loads the gun, environment pulls the trigger.
People with autism don't purposely harm other people. They are not pathological liars either. You should be the victim of a psychopath. I'd like to know your thoughts afterwards. After someone destroys your career and your mental health! Of course, victims should think: "Oh, poor thing! He does not mean to be evil!" While they spend a while in a mental health hospital themselves, with no no career, family or friends left and the one who destroyed them gives talks and has all the positive attention
Wish I could volunteer for one of theses scans. Just to help me better understand myself. As some of what he said hits home. If I could better explain myself. Maybe it would help me be better.
Get a DNA test. They’re cheap and they tell you if you have some of the “telltale” alleles for all sorts of fun mental disorders. Just accept the fact that your genetic information is now corporate IP
Socio- and Psychopaths (different!) both scare me a bit. I can spot these people out in the wild -- people often willing to stomp on your foot, if necessary, to get ahead -- or worse. 😧 Or people who might see a bus headed toward a child and shrug their shoulders, because they don't want to spill their coffee. With quality therapy, though, these people can often become pro-social and high functioning. I wish society focused more on CONSTRUCTIVE topics like mental health, and LESS on bs like stimying rights of gay people, women, or minorities. Can you imagine what we could accomplish?
@@susank2019 Legit question! You put me on the spot! This is where I fess up that I'm no psychiatrist -- just an armchair "expert," with knowledge based solely in interviews, and random articles read. (I've also dated someone with strong sociopathic traits, for several years, if that counts for anything.) In lieu of articles (although perhaps I can find some), below are names of two outspoken people, who frequently discuss their journeys with therapy, and how it's given them the tools to better interface with society, and become "high-functioning." - Kanika Batra - person with antisocial personality disorder, narcissism, and bpd (I believe). Fequently discusses the misogyny that exists in the world of mental disorders (/everywhere). - M.E. Tomas - is a lawyer, and recent author, living with psychopoathy. She's done lots of interviews on [this site], and AMAs on red - - - . Both women discuss how therapy shed light on navigating the world of neurotypicals, and how they, themselves, could benefit personally from a positive coexistence. While they both claim to be high functioning, neither tout that therapy "cured them." If you have any insight, please share! I find the topic very intriguing.
@@susank2019 Yes, from what I heard, therapy can offer "coping mechanisms" and mental paradigm shifts (in lieu of cures. NS if there's a medicinal approach as well). But those are still great, because it eases the friction between the affected person and the outside world. And mitigates the desire to for that person to manifest some of the traits that can cause friction with the rest of society. The trick seems to be just showing the person how these strategies can benefit _themselves._ And simply to educate -- to point out and explain the chemical, neural, and behavioral differences, and thus how to navigate through the neurotypicals' world. I'm guessing another hard part can be finding a therapist who works for you!! I've heard that finding a good / experienced therapist can be like dating. :0 Perhaps the aforementioned red - - - (site) could offer some insight. Again, I'm no professional!! Just interested in these things. I'm guessing you're looking on behalf of someone else? Only bc you used "them." I hope you're doing ok in your journey. I know my several years of dating / friendship with my sociopathic person (not in therapy) is an ongoing challenge. It's great that you care, though.
I resemble this, but I cry a lot when feeling empathy for both human and animal suffering. This feeling was new to me when I lost the love of my life, Sheila Grace. We we're together for 32 years, married for nearly 27 and had 6 beautiful children together. I was willingly possessed by her spirit to be better from that day forward. It was for our children, but she is the Mother who gave me the unconditional love and nurturing that I was lacking. So I tell our children that she raised me too in many ways.
Put the 8 cardinal traits of a psychopath over a scrub sink and most surgeons would be like: "yep, what's the issue?" 16 yrs in the O.R. Love, love, love my good surgeons.
@@jimosullivan1389 Then maybe take care of yourself better? So many idiots in these comments. The majority of doctors go the way of the patient. Hardly gods. Just humans. That's all. Think before you comment.
I have a friend who I think is this way too. I'd tell her a news headline like these girls in DC who stole a car and murdered an Uber driver, and she'd express great sympathy for the girls because she thought it was empathetic. It was actually terrifying and she broke up with me in cold blood after calling me needy after I opened up to her about my sexual assault.
Psychopathy is not funny. The audiences laughter giving Fallon the supply he needs shows what is wrong with society. Psychopathy is confused with confidence. We even vote them in to lead countries with this basic mistake of confusing callousness for charm. This guy says that everybody that knew him believed he was a sociopath before he told them about his brain scan. Though he has also stated elsewhere that his wife had no clue, and he mixes up his stories of how and why his brain scan was used in his studies. He lies. He admits to being callous and cold, and uses it for laughs, and at the end he states that he is feigning empathy now, and that makes him a good friend! He has no real insight. He also uses the old excuse of empathy being a hindrance, and says he wants a surgeon to be unempathic if they are working on him. And he wants a soldier to be a psychopath as long as they protect him. Someone else in these comments said a psychopathic soldier was acceptable and justified on the battlefield. But where is the battlefield? It’s never been in outer space! Every battle fought in human history has been in the middle of people’s homes and livelihoods. When the battle is done, those psychopathic soldiers can’t get enough and so they look for innocent civilians to mame and murder, and they hunt down women and children to rape. Yes children, and pretty much anything with a hole when it’s a psychopath looking for satisfaction! The rest of the world is looking to end these brutal practices of war, but James Fallon is happy for other bums to be fucked as long as it saves his sorry little ass! Cos his is the only one that matters, right? And the audience laughs and finds it funny, and people in the comments say “isn’t he doing well? A functioning psychopath! He’s just a normal person really!” Get a grip, this is not a normal human being people! This is a dangerous human being, who lacks the social skills to be classed as fully human. Holding down a job whilst being an insensitive asshole to other people’s needs does not make him normal - and you can feel free to tell your boss that! We as a whole human society need rid of these people, especially from being in charge. They should never be surgeons, soldiers, CEO’s and world “leaders” - because they are children inside. They care about nothing but themselves, and cannot think for the good of everybody alive now, let alone several generations ahead. They are not adults, but people give them the most responsible jobs! And it will cost the human race our place on Earth if we don’t put a stop to this.
Search for the Hare Psychopathy Checklist. If memory serves, it's a 22-item survey which scores you out of 40. Anything above 30 is a sign of psychopathy, apparently. In its self-test guise, it should be used only as a guide though, of course. The test can be found on several websites, including psychology-tools.
I am the exact same, i live across the country from most of my family, and not for any ambitious career reasons. When covid happened i was glad i didn't have to fly out to see them for Christmas. But i do actually love them.
@Ronnie Sal I would never have said they're the same. If anything I've found that taking a select few leaves from the book of sociopathy protects autistics from a lot of the using & abusing we accidentally line ourselves for.
@@aussiejubes I agree with you in that. Perhaps, sadly we all need to learn something from psychopaths. Since they are the only people who do not suffer their illness but actually make others suffer. I don't mean qe should make others suffer, but also we should not suffer for what we are, while others get away with it!
Which would be a main trait of ASPD (narcissism) aka loving the attention. So long as he gains attention in a positive way, and not shooting up a school I'm cool.
@@DaymonBurnside Neither of you are correct. A NARCISSIST as in Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a pathological condition characterized by attention seeking and grandiose displays... only as a mask to hide insecurities. Psychopaths and ASPDs usually have a degree of narcissism, but it is not the main character trait at all. They don't need attention at all. They are just supremely confident, without any underlying insecurities whatsoever, and they just come across as narcissistic.
@@djLagwayEnjoyer Hi Clayton. I think that most psychologists/psychiatrists with expertise in personality disorders would say every psychopath does have narcissistic CHARACTER TRAITS. But that doesn't mean their narcissism qualifies as a disorder, such as someone with NPD. I think that's where people get confused. To be diagnosed as NPD, you have to meet at least 5 out of 9 character traits, and NPDs narcissism stems from very low self esteem and feelings of shame and guilt. The narcissism in NPDs is a cover therefore for their poor upbringing and abuse, and their main motivation is to be the center of attention. Psychopaths however cannot be NPD, because their inability to feel remorse, empathy, fear, and guilt prevents them from ever getting NPD. Their brains are wired differently. Psychopaths are narcissistic in the sense that their main motivation is to serve themselves and not others, and because they are genuinely confident and take control of social situations. But they can care less whether or not they are the center of attention. If you insult or ignore a psychopath, they will laugh and walk away, or maybe insult you worse, but they really don't care. An NPD however goes crazy and will throw tantrums and devalue other people... that's why NPD is a disorder in itself.
@@peterbruns6124 while you're correct that aspd dont care for attention, nor do they care about anything narracistic traits are so overwhelming and often covert in high functioning aspd that they could easily fit the criteria of NPD if they were not overly malignant in nature. Remember the covert narracistic sociopath that shoots up a school and tell me again, how he doesn't crave attention... You're trying too hard to be right.. and you're sticking far to hard to the DSM, which his the problem with the mental health system in general... Everyone is on a scale.... If you're aware of the covert element to high functioning aspd you'd understand why it's foolish to assume that aspd don't have npd on some scale... also ASPD like psychopaths can feel emotion. That's becoming the consensus. So behaviours like devaluation and splitting can happen to people who are very close with the PWASPD.. So if you can understand this, you can understand how complex cases can have cormorbid aspd and npd Because you can't tell the difference on paper.. you need to get to know the individual.
Heres a little rhyme about psychopaths (think James Bond vs the bad guy): Psychopaths are important, but only because psychopaths exist. We have to take care of the ones we see to protect us from those we miss.
I believe my aunt's husband was either a pro social psychopath or a sociopath. He was pretty well adjusted, not intentionally unkind and very generous with his time and talents but completely unaffected by others suffering or death, he joked his way through both his parents funerals and didn't shed a tear at his wife's funeral either. He also said he found a friend's depression amusing. He wanted to be a fighter pilot however diabetes stopped that in its tracks but if it hadn't I think he had the potential to be one of the most effective and deadly fighter pilots in the RAF.
Psychopathy is just like any other mental disorder (eg. autism spectrum disorder) not something you choose. This guy has the balls to be honest and accept the hand he's been dealt. Kevin Dutton has written a book (The Wisdom of Psychopaths) about how psychopaths can indeed be a valuable asset to society. Sometimes being genuinely indifferent to whether a person lives or dies is the most valuable property a person can possess in order to save lifes.
I think the main problem with psychopaths is the "who watches the watchmen" dilemma. Because they can only be stopped by another psychopath usually. And if a group of psychopaths agrees on working together via e.g. religion or philosophy, the rest of society doesn't stand a chance to stop them. World history could probably described just as a continuous serious of teamed up psychopaths ruining the lifes of everyone else. My question would be, do we really need them? Still? Now that all predators are gone?
@@TheFren I don't think it's a matter of needing them or getting rid of them but more so how do we evolve and improve to the point that these type of people aren't produced anymore.
The autism spectrum isn’t “over there, with those people, not us”; it’s right here, and we’re all on it. It’s just a matter of our position on it. This is true of any other personality trait.
Fascinating. I've heard about this guy but never seen him before. He also has that really charming, charismatic thing that all the "best" psychopaths have. I am recovering from childhood trauma and I've sometimes wondered whether I am a sociopath. Maybe I should get the brain scan...
between you and me, these guys have something figured out. sure, murder is ignoble and often pointless, but defense of and absolute control over the self is all that matters in life.
I was instantly given a social cultural insight listening to Dr. Fallon on the youtube program from the interview in Australia, when he talked about being from a warrior genetic class tracing back to northern Italy (maybe also Sicily) but that he noticed his mother sitting on a three-legged stool and thinking of immigrants, and remembered how loving his family had been to him and how socializing of him they had been. That caused me to see immediately the Italian or Sicilian cliche of the loving and highly social families was a pattern developed to mitigate the warrior genes that may be in the same genetic base. Do Scorsese and the "Godfather" lovers comprehend that the behavior they admire and wish to emulate is really an effort, perhaps unconscious or a little conscious, to disincline psycopathic behavior in the young? Maybe?
I know this is a really old post, but I agree. I also wonder what would happen if a psychopath who was open to intense somatic therapeutic experience utilized this tool to internally place attention to the areas of the brain that are under active, with the intent to cultivate activation. I wonder if that would work. Body energy work has changed so much for me, healed me of organic inherited physiological ailments and trauma. And it didn’t take very long, maybe 2-3 years of brief daily practice. I don’t believe for one second in the imitations of genetic predisposition.
@@Misssixty510 I can already tell you neither as sociopath or psychopath would probably do any of that or feel they would benefit at all from pseudoscience.
@@Misssixty510 Hi!! I realize your question is 9 months old but if you are still looking for an answer: Yes! In my personal experience somatic and vasovagal exercises helped calm down my episodes ALOT. Before that, I did yoga for 6 years and being in tune with my body was the best thing that ever happened to my brain! Highly recommend Befriending Your Nervous System by Deborah Dana LCSW. As a caveat: I hate violence as a premise and am not generally prone to violence. I have pretty intense PTSD that bleeds over into factor 2 psychopathy, so I end up with social functioning deficits and impulsive violence when thrratened as opposed to calculated violence a la factor 1 or genetic psychopathy. Overall though, between the yoga & other body based therapies along with empathy training my connection with others has gone from 0 as a child to being told regularly that I am a great friend. The other day my son who also has slight psychopathy leanings told me I was a great mom (made me cry lol). Recovery is possible. Someone just has to care about us enough to make it happen.
There's a prosocial version of most disorders. And in those, "not caring" isn't quite what it is in the other versions. I suppose wanting to be liked is selfish and about oneself, but it also necessitates caring about how others feel, because how they feel about YOU is a subset of their general feelings. So while they may only truly "care" because of how it affects how they are viewed and treated, they will still go out of their way to treat others with kindness. It's not ideal, but it could be a lot worse.
I know! One time I stood up in front of a group to tell my life story, was supposed to be serious exchange of backgrounds, I was not trying to be funny.... people were laughing so hard... I was shocked but just rolled with it.
It's the nervous laughter of an audience that is beginning to realize that they share their world with sociopaths and psychopaths, who comprise 3 and 1 % of the population. Everybody knows one or more of each type. The good news is that usually they are harmless exactly because of their inability to bond with others. They are usually loners or outsiders. The ones to watch out for are the ones who manage to attain positions in companies, governments and gangs.
@@genewickersham4593 good point there Gene. I'm starting to think it's a good idea to learn to just accept it. Not accept bad behavior by any means. It doesn't meant they're all malignant. Some can be pretty manipulative though, and it's good to know the difference between healthy/unhealthy relationships, how to have strong boundaries and how to spot manipulation. Really these are just good skill to obtain in becoming a mature human though.
Interesting and chilling how at the end he tried to convince the audience that 'maybe we need people like that' in our society (meaning psychopaths). I certainly don't want one as a doctor or surgeon, thank you.
He’s simply drawing a conclusion to his original question and one that many ask, “Why are there still psychopaths if it’s an inherently ‘evil’ and disadvantageous state of being?”. Also, if you’ve spent any amount of time on an OR table, there’s a chance you’ve already had one. Do with that information as you may
@@macstrong1284It is a twisted interpretation of evolution. they are advantageous to themselves. Not to society at large. Many people are born and live with different illneses. That does not make their illnesses an adaptation. They are certainly a disadvantage to their families, and except in psychopathy, to themselves. Pdychopaths are the only ones who do not suffer through their pahology. The rest of the world, does suffer it!
@@RS54321 he is just twisting the teory of evolution to his advantage, as psychopaths do with everything. He is saying half truths. There exist many illnesses in this world, that does not mean they are advantageous or necessary, just a byproduct of life, and they persist as long as they are not lethal, not because they are useful. Eg. Think about hearth dissease, ADHD, Schizophrenia or Alzheimer's. People who suffer from them would rather not suffer them. Only psychopaths don't feel that way because it is not them who suffer, but the people around them!
5:27 - "she figured she was going to die from something else. She didn't". Don't need no brain scan, saying "She didn't" in the passing about his wife illness like that raised my eyebrows way before he got to the punchline about his low-key psychopathy.
