The power of AUTHENTICITY (the word of the year) 

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Bars👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

Dayyymmmnn 🔥🔥🔥

That was me

Powerful AND TRUE comment! ❤

This!!!!

Beautiful share. 🌼 Thanks. You are not alone. 🧡

It felt good being in court? Surely you’d feel anxious being in court, not proud of how you were coming across?

Yup

It almost made me cry reading your comment. I am sorry 😢 Moms are suppose to be the angels for their children.

Go on!👏🏻💪🏻

I´m sorry for what you're going through. Good for you that you're speaking your truth. I wish my mother in law and I would´ve had a good relationship. I needed it. My own mother doesn't live and my father was on the other side of the Atlantic ocean (he doesn't live any longer). I was very vulnerable and accepted much. The wrong way, because I was very hurt by it. I was careful to not get into a discussions etc. Still my mother in law did and said a lot of things that were abusive. A lot of expectations on me too. I became a new mother too, we had two little children and all the pressure that comes with that. I honestly think this affected my husband and my relationship a lot. That things were very tense and I didn't know how to handle it and had no support. If I knew back then, what I know right now, I think things would´ve been different. We get a lot of support from our church (Catholic) by the sane doctrines and theology. I converted five years ago. Our priests (most of those I have met, but not all of them) are extremely knowledgeable regarding relationships etc within the family and offer a lot of help. There are so many virtues I am learning about and I actually realize I need/needed to learn and practice so that I could handle things better. Without hurting myself or my mother in law (or my husband) and instead, acting with my authenticity (with whatever virtue needed) - that I think would´ve made a big difference. I am sure I would´ve been able to protect myself (and my husbands and my relationship) better because of this (and not the least, because of prayers I would have prayed) and I am sure I would´ve gained respect. From them and self respect too. Instead I knew nothing about this, I was young, alone and extremely vulnerable and had no idea how to handle the attacks I got. Unfortunately my husband and I divorced and it has been such a tough roller coaster since then. Extremely tough. Only my church has helped me immensely, many years later.. but things have became better. With Gods grace. I have learned slowly but surely, more and more. I wish you the very best, keep learning and protecting yourself (and your closest family) and I am sure you'll all flourish. All the best ❤

@empath7766, That's true. A former "friend" of mine used to say things like, "I know she isn't retaliatory. She's a decent type.".....and similar. Another one was, "If a friendship goes sour, you hope for a soft landing." Such odd things to say, I thought to myself. Those were the people she pursued for friendship, and I was one of them. When I finally wanted to leave the friendship, those things she used to say started to make sense to me. She knew I wouldn't make things nasty or hard. I just stopped being available, and without asking me why (she KNEW why!😂) she dropped off by herself, like a tick who is full and doesn't need to suck any more of your blood.

Depends on whether the narcissist is a violent psychopath or not. I've had both. I laid low with the criminal psychopath and got help to escape. He later murdered his final victims. Other narcissists, less criminal, I've been authentic with and broke off the relationship. Why put up with them. One thing for sure: This arrogant United States of America is RIFE with narcissists, criminal and non-criminal and they pretty much have destroyed the country. This from a 25-year political activist and domestic violence survivor and adult child of a narcissistic parent, and survivor of multiple employer abuse and narcissistic friendships. Narcissism is everywhere in this country.

True. But doing it honestly makes a narcissist show their true colors. Then you GTFO of there. I'm grateful that my authenticity saved my life. 💝

I think it's true to some extent, especially when you're financially dependent or have kids with a narcissist. But I think that being more authentic (it's always a spectrum) with the narcissist, might mean that they're losing their mental advantage over you.

True! 💯

Rightly said 👍

Heh. I'm into astrology and I was just telling myself a bit earlier that I need to be careful whom I allow into my 7th house - the House of Others (as opposed to Self - 1st house).

You are so correct!

They absolutely hate it. And they know they aren't authentic but just pretend to be.

@@aynilaa Well I guess they're not willing to be vulnerable, to enable their authenticity. I find it quite sad and ironic that, they see it as weak, though aren't willing to show the strength needed, to be themselves, as is. And I thought I was bad at adulting at times.. 😂

I feel like God Himself is speaking to me through your comment. I love this.

I wish Good luck to you

Whoa. You are such a profound thinker! Thanks for this comment. 🎭

@@websurfer5772 lol, perfect emoji, ty

Hooray!

Same experience. Do you still talk to your mother? I have to due to societal expectations. But I do it as rarely as I possibly can. Though I think she might live to 100 years just out of sheer spite 😂

That’s wonderful. Well done. I’m low contact and if I need to help, I’ll do so from a text message. My niece and nephew get on with my narcissistic mother and they seem willing to help. I’m not bothered any more and I don’t care what people say. I know the truth of her constant betrayals and her lies. Not helping an abusive parent is not a societal expectation. Honour the mother who honoured her position as a mother. 🥰🤗

@@TheBlondiekitten I needed to be reminded of this. Others may have a relationship with our abuser but we know the truth of our experience. I struggle with that and scared, that I will be viewed as evil for going no contact because that is not their experience.I feel less alone when I read shared expirences like this. Thank you for sharing yours.

Your not alone

Yes!

Amen

I'm not perfect. I appreciate those who are strong enough to be authentic....

😄 Yeah!

@youngblood8540 , True ,It takes guts to face their nonsense . Narcissists work hard to break you down.

thank you

i know....this is why i really hope to see more videos about what to do in those situations...no contact, grey rock....and all the other usual suggestions just don't work in these situations...i mean i know who am i dealing with and i know it would be best to leave....but there are very practical reasons why that is not possible....so what to do then?

They just don’t like anyone who don’t give them supply.

Yrs they need supply and negativity to cope

I just left a job where the guy I worked with would not use my first name; called me derivatives of the name even though I told him I prefer my name. Never did call me by name. Higher ups gaslighted my experiences. So I resigned. Then they asked me for suggestions how they could improve, even after 3 meetings with them. Duhhhhhh

@@Warriorbride11that’s so rude and extremely weird. They are very odd people.

We (autistic people) are mirrors to others and it seems to irk not only narcs but people who refuse to self reflect/avoidant of their emotions!

I think we're authentically feeling defensive when we're being unfairly criticized.

You are. We are. It feels good to be energy vampire slayers 😎🙌

@@NicoleBarden-Writer. Yes, imagine that. It is attainable through sincere practice of your religion, if you are given the gift of discernment of spirits, G-d willing. May you, at least, receive that. I associated myself 2012 circa in trying to learn meditation in the Himalayan tradition from an American born yogi, who has since dropped his body. He clearly had this ability. He had the ability to see to one's core, without being told anything; He could instantly discern. It was the fruit of long practice. It must be somewhat disappointing for the accomplished ones to attempt to help people to raise themselves spiritually to become authentic and to truly apply themselves assiduously to the sanatana dharma, to the Perennial Philosophy. Swami Veda Bharati was one of his associates, as well as Charles Bates,and others. The man I refer to, however , wrote a book about his life, entitled Walking w. a Himalayan Master, which was blurbed by Georg Feuerstein. His formal name was Swami Jai Dev, and perhaps still is. He began life with the name, Justin O'Brien. He started out as a Catholic monk. Some of his students have tried to have him be recognized as a saint in the context of Roman catholicism. So far as I know, he was a saint--he helped many many people and he exhibited, when appropriate, evidence of the siddhis. He certainly lacked hubris and egomania so far as I could discern. He lived a life of sacrifice in order to benefit humanity. Americanized 'yoga' is not true to the tradition, for yoga begins with ethics and the profit motive, branding of oneself for name and fame are contrary to yoga. Ethics are primary, in my opinion. I do not mean always adhering to the expectations of others. Trying times these.

Which country are you from?

I am very very proud of myself for not being authentic, that is revealing my true thoughts and feelings, with cops that came to arrest me and then psychiatrists who fed me antipsychotics during the 20 days my narc family forced me to spend in a psychiatric clinic. That was 10 years ago, december 2013, and thinking about all that this week, I admire the young strong woman I was then, knowing how to put on a mask and survive.

Wow. Me, too…until this last year. I’ve now spoken my truth to my brutally narcissistic mother about who I authentically am, and have done so in the context of “This is what you’ve either ignored, paid no attention to or have never cared to know - about me.” It’s the only time I’ve gently, yet forcefully, told her to just sit there and be quiet or I would leave without another word…and it’s the only time she’s actually done so. When I was finished, I walked out the door, and other than some small essentials of dealing with a widowed, 85 year old mother, I do not call or interact. I feel freer than I have in my entire lifetime, without no guilt, shame or regret for standing up for who I am.

Catholics need to stay OUT of American women's reproductive choices. Hardly an AUTHENTIC religion, just another patriarchal old boys club that has done great harm to humanity.