Pessimism is not that bad. The problem lies in overthinking. When you overthink, you create an exaggerated negative version of something. Basically if something bad is inevitable, overthinking makes you go through that twice.
Yep. I've noticed over the last few years that if a loved one is terminally ill, the thought if them dying is more traumatic than the actual event. However, maybe it helps strengthen you for the inevitable. Going through it a '2nd time' (when it actually happens), you're more resilient.
I agree with what you wrote in general, but I think the way you framed it implies "pessimism" as a conscious decision. I think it is an involuntary predisposition to select a bad outcome as a more certain one compared to alternatives.
Pessimism about how bad life can be will lead you to be grateful for how your life currently is, but if your pessimistic and complaining about your current life all the time all it will lead to is depression.
Preparing for the Worst increases one's Psychological ability and operational capacity to react immediately (with no despair) when seconds count. Dampen Expectation(s)? Not in my book.
@@HighSpeedNoDrag I don't really prepare for the worst anymore, it just flows naturally. Everyday situations is what it is and I just handle them in the moment.
Have high expectations of yourself but don't give in to other people's expectations of you. That will only keep you stressed and worried. You should feel confident in yourself, strengths, competence, and abilities.
I think it's wise to have positive visualisation on the things that we can control and negative visualisation on things that are beyond our control. That s the equilibrium mindset.
When you *"KNOW"* that everything is sh*t, from there and on, all positive additions to your life will be a bonus. If your worst predictions become the reality, then you were right all along.
I agree with this, and this is why many people choose the philosophy taught by some religious groups and religions. They view human life and condition as zero state, which means you begin your life without anything, and not entitled to anything. The world is a corrupt place where bad things will happen, therefore good things are either a bonus or a "gift" from the God/Higher Power.
Ahimsa42 Can you explain? Better to be dead? You don’t see how what you wrote is nonsense unless you explain it? Also I think anyone who writes something like “it’s better to be dead” for any reason clearly hasn’t faced mortality. Be careful how you write things like that. You are doing a disservice to yourself and to others by writing “it’s better to be dead imo”. Some severely depressed people who may be watching these videos for help may read your comment and start thinking about death, and worse suicide. Another reason is if you, God forbid, get some serious illness such as cancer, even non-terminal one, you’ll be facing greater likelyhood of dying from it. Do you really want to them remember your comment where you wrote “it’s better to be dead?”. I mean, people should think about the consequences of what they write.
Two and a half minutes in I’m reminded of the mindset I was taught by my dad when I was a very young girl - Pay attention. Trust people to be people, they’re a little bit to a lot of everything. Be flexible so you don’t get cornered either by yourself or by somebody else. Side note - this is a life saving mindset for motorcyclists
I have a “ worst case scenario“ mindset when I’m at work.. I’ve had people say to me that “ your always thinking the worst of every situation “ .. I’m not a negative person by any means. I believe in planning for the worst case scenario because it means I am always prepared to solve it .. if the situation ends up being not as bad as I expected then it’s a pleasant surprise for me.. people who think too positively leave out a big sense of reality in everything they do and are often not prepared to handle situations that catch them off guard.. and are often very disappointed in how their day went.. to be too positive is an unrealistic way of thinking and frankly just not helpful mentally
Umm nope. Not good way of thinking in my opinion. Be positive (not naive), things you want to go well- “see” them go well in your head. Mindful of the worst case scenario, with the attitude that you are there to avoid it at all costs. Those scenarios probably won’t happen very often. You probably find yourself digging out of worst case scenarios, simply because you spent too much time thinking about how to solve them rather then how to FIGHT so they NEVER happen. Will it be “NEVER happen’?? Of course not, but be too busy about making and getting things right , failure to achieve a goal is just a hick up, “worst case scenario” ain’t sh*t that could stop me. I’ll solve that problem if it DARES to manifest itself on my path! Cheers :)
The irony about stoicism but what I find to be a major positive is once you realize how people continually act against nature or unruly as Marcus stated it becomes in your best interest to distance yourself from these people. When you do this you no longer feel anger and resentment for these people you simply accept them for who they are. You yourself also become more resilient in the process. Creating a healthy distance has personally helped me tremendously.
@@boneymacaroni13 What I have discovered is that one should not focus on life in terms of what gives you status i.e. I will become an engineer because it will make my parents and their friends happy, and as such, I will feel important at parties. Instead every person should determine; how will this engineering degree allow me to save money as fast as possible to get out of the rat race and achieve true freedom. True freedom being being able to wake up every day and do what you want. I discovered that freedom is the most important thing in life, and now I have retired early, do not have to associate with negative people, and can do what I want without impedance. In this regard people should be freedom hounds rather than status hounds.
@@biashacker what you said it kind of the reason I haven't quit. It pays well in my opinion, and I'm hoping it means I'll get to retire before the national age of fucking 66 (*?!?!?*)😑 I *crave* that freedom... Been dreaming of retirement since I was 21 basically.. here I am at 28 feeling like I've already spent too much time in the rat race. Edit: I never got into my job to make anyone happy, I thought it was interesting and had a higher salary in my field... I guess I just need to work on my patience and keep that freedom goal in mind..
It's quite a wonder to have all these techniques by hand in most of us, without knowing about stoicism and further.. may be the real teacher is pain itself ♥️ thank you for the video
@@sfjlfkjsdlfkjds Leonides Does answer is meant in a joking way, because "we Germans" often make jokes about Bavaria being a separate country, on the one hand, because Bavaria has very distinct traditions and a very distinct dialect that the rest of Germany does not really identify with, and on the other hand, because we just like to make fun of Bavarians. I would compare it to USA and Texas, maybe.
Einzelganger, I viewed this excellent piece almost 10 days (to the day) after having a heart attack. Needless to say pessimism was at the very least in my background. I had already been 4 or 5 days in hospital and was to attend again within 24 hours for a procedure that (In honesty) had me very worried and not in any way my usual self. I sat and viewed the latest offering from my favourite Presenter, Adviser or Sage and Ironically the title was "The Power Of Pessimism!." For a short while it really felt like the world was having a joke and I was the brunt of said joke! I am writing to THANK YOU so much for making an equally scary and very confusing time not only easier for me, but actually much, much calmer! . GENUINELY, Your words helped me through a very bad time in my life. I combined your words and direction with meditation, on and off over the 24 hours and I am happy to report the procedure went off literally without a hitch and while I could not claim that it was a pleasant experience, I can claim it was not as worrying, dreadful or pessimistic as it appeared prior to YOUR guidance. I Really Just Wanted To Say Thank You :O)
The good thing of being pessimistic is that I always have an alternative plan for whatever I do or try to do. Always. The bad thing is, when those alternatives fail, too, depression starts eating me from the inside.
Positively trust things by default to reaffirm their good nature, yet prepare for and expect the unexpected side of things when they come. This way you can prepare for the negative and yet encourage positivity together. It’s about acceptance in the purest clearest way, and also unconditionally loving life itself. Balancing them both out is key here. Use it wisely.
I strongly disagree. Here "pessimism" is not used in the way as we use the word today in 2019. Aurelius "pessimism" is closer to realism. I think by "realism" I mean an attitude which assumes bad things will happen just like the good, and a rejection of the view that "everything will be awesome". But pessimism as a term today refers to a DISTORTED perspective which has no rational basis for expecting the worst, or generally bad outcomes. Going over difficult, unpleasant, tragic....bad, scenarios of life is not pessimism. So is detachment. A big difference between realism and pessimism is that realism is more like a "maybe" or "could happen". The use of the term "pessimism" is different. It is a mental expectation, or insistence, that necessarily "bad" things will happen instead of the "good". Focusing disproportionately on the possible undesirable outcomes when it may only be 50/50.
Exactly. In essence pessimists are "bitchy" people who think they are going to fail at everything, and they only are glad when their negative forecasts are met, while any positive outcome is atributed to mere luck, and that by no means is the purpose of stoicism, which focuses in preparing us for the worst while trying to do our best to achieve our goals and enjoy our lives.
@@aminuabdulmanaf4434 I am aware of what a strawman is, but I am not seeing where I am arguing using a strawman argument. My argument is that either "pessimism" is defined incorrectly, or that the state of mind described in the video is confusing realism and pessimism BASED ON how the words are used in modern time. Pessimism is the belief that the worst will necessarily happen and not something better than the worst. This is actually one of known psychological disorders, except pessimism is not the disorder itself, but a symptom. Pessimism in this context means that someone is expecting the worst without evidence that the worst will necessarily be the actual outcome of any event.
Interesting video. I hope people will try both negative and positive visualization on small things, to see what works for them. "Negative visualization is an anxiety reducer." is definitely the OPPOSITE of true for me. I've made some terrible choices in my life based on negative visualizing which did nothing but increase anxiety tenfold for me and scared me from acting at all on a situation where the worst case scenario or negative visualization would likely never have happened. Had I created positive visualizations of the exact same situation and gone through it in my head with a positive visualization and positive outcome, even still being aware that the situation in real life was not all sunshine and rainbows but with some real adversity involved, I believe I would have gone into it with much more ease and a much better and attitude and stronger stance, and seen that there was actually not much to fear. Maybe it differs if you normally have anxiety or don't. I now believe I do, but didn't realize that when I was busy visualizing the worst case scenario, then scaring myself from acting altogether. Now I know that negative visualization doesn't work for me and have to actively stop myself when I do it, and remind myself to come up with a positive visualization, even while knowing that the real situation may be more adverse than my positive visualization.
You articulated what I was thinking, but couldn't quite put into words, so well. *Exactly* this will work for some, but not well for others. Humans are not cookie cutter creatures.
According to me the pessimistic approach is so good that it allows you lower down your expectations, it allows you to prepare for the worst but, the problem lies when we use pessimistic approach in every possible scenario and get overselves detached from the current reality, ultimately missing the joy of the moment. The mastery lies in 'when' and upto 'what' extent we should be pessimistic.
thank you for making this beautiful video. Wish you a great health and have food in your table. Still my words would be less to describe my affection for your work.
This channel is absolutely fantastic! I think this is the first time I have disagreed. This is not pessimistic/ pessimism, this is realism. Pessimism paints all things in a negative light despite if it is true or not.
What about manifestation theory.? The more you think and focus on something, that gets manifested... So if you think bad intensely and focus more on it, you get bad.The more you focus on good ,you get good things. Regarding the future,it's not in our control..We can't escape from pain.We are here to experience everything and become strong. I think here, thinking and focusing on negative things in order to prepare ourselves for the future, this philosopher has manifested all negative events and all his fears had come true... So all are different people with different findings and experiences...Its all about seeking answers to knowing oneself. So lot of questioning needed here .I feel we can take lessons from all philosophers and study them, apply them to our life, self reflect , experience it personally and find out as per our experiences...because whatever we have heard so far is written from their personal experiences.
I remember when i bought my first Enchiridion but it was not translated by my favorite translator and it seemed to have christian themes inserted. As i became more and more angry ... i suddenly realized a passage . What am i a grammarian or a philosopher ? In the spirit of the Enchiridion i allow many interpretations to pass my eyes now . Following the spirit of stoicism insteam of exact grammar.
Its not about being optimistic or being pessimistic, they are both polarities that twist the reality in front of us. By preparing for the worst in people or situations you already expect the worst, in that case you are not seeing what is really in front of you cause you have already pre judged reality. same goes for optimism. Non judgement is the way. We are too attached to our comfort zone and always looking forward to it and when things dont go as planned we struggle. If we take people and situations as they appear in any moment without resistance we become better listeners and flow trough life. To learn to do so you must practice non action. One way is meditation. Patience is key.
Man, Marcus Aurelius had so many excellent quotes: "The people I will deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly." So true, so true. It seems it has been like this forever, so why am I so surprised every time it happens?
4:06 you just described most people on the planet. It's naive to assume that for example, some who is a constant asshat doesn't know any better - wrong because he/she has CHOSEN by free will to BECOME an asshat. Most people DO NOT CARE anything about others, and if you can't see that god help you.
I like how stoicism and budhhism are the same in some ideas... looks like the gods offer us chances... "you cant beat death but you can beat death in life..". i love how charles bukowski make this line in a poet..
Hi. Your videos made me missed Bandung. I guess you have been live in there for some moment. Aren't you? *Not to neglect that your videos and narrations are gems.
I used to be an overly nice guy, who always thought positive of people, but now I leave the house with half of a hostile mind-set to defend against arrogance, and conflict. But most times the day goes by smooth.
Thank you for this video! There’s alot of improvement in my overall mental wellbeing by applying the teachings of stoicism. But what about being assertive? Is there any verse about it?
also why is being distracted by what happens in nature separate from nature if we including our human brains are part of nature itself There does seem to be a bizarre disconnect that our own reactions are somehow not natural according to whom are our own reactions unnatural? And why is being peaceful towards things more natural than being distracted by them. To my knowledge any kind of evaluation or reaction is natural It would be quite unnatural for a paper plate to react to being moved off a coffee table in that a paper plate does not have a nervous system But its quite natural for beings with a nervous system which thoughts memories emotions and temperament to react to events as natural as breathing. What makes humans special we are separate from nature. I also do not see the false dichotomy between seeing things as desirable or undesirable and understanding things as part of nature. Being mauled by a tiger would be "part of nature" Having that tiger start to bite you would be very natural Its quite hungry. What is also part of nature is our body reacting to being eaten Our brains kind of have built in response system to tell us when we are ARE in danger, whether our needs are met or not. Words or language using one part of the brain cannot override these desires or preferences though both reason language as well as sensations are BOTH part of nature Again its a false dichotomy between what we WANT to happen and what CAN or WILL happen and understanding on the later does little to change the former. As for being realistic its emotional value is neutral. Being realistic is a description of objective reality as it IS. In the absence of judgment of evaluation or experience realism is neither "good" nor "bad" THAT we ARE mortal is a fact that we do not want ourselves or people we care about to be mortal is ALSO a fact. Knowing facts about the world in no way by itself influences us emotionally in the absence of some preference desire for what we want to experience within the world labeling something as a fact does not change our preferences at all
But doesn't this break the dichotomy of control principle? We're thinking about the future and what could be, in a pessimistic way. How do we do that without dwelling for too long on pessimism
I feel as though the mistake that is being made is, giving things such titles as "perssimism" in the first place, because you have a desired outcome, any other outcome does not need to be seen in a "negative" light, or even a "positive" one, it is simply an outcome that arrives from variables within, or outside, your control, and you deal with whatever situation arrives from it. It is audacious to assume you can predict the future, it is better to be a person who is ready for any future, for if even your "worst case scenario" predictions too, end up being wrong, you are now no more "prepared", than you would have been if you had never fathomed such in the first place. To always want you mind to go to the "negative", seems like a mundane way of living life to me, what is there to enjoy, when there is always a reason to be "pessimistic"
I thought about this too. I feel it would help to structure the wording in our favor. For instance instead of stating that we will encounter negativity we might say instead I feel I may encounter betrayal, negativity and so on versus making it a statement in affirmation style. Then we can visualize ourselves overcoming such pessimistic situations. This way we positively view and use negativity. It helps us plan for the worst while expecting the best. He also says only to use this pessimism as a reminder not as a constant thought which turns int worry. Just my thoughts. I know nothing really ...
Thinking pessimistic to dampen your expectations or make you feel better about certain things does not help you at all. It will drag you down, kill your motivation and make you depressed. Maybe not today or tomorrow but over time it will happen.
I am *feeling* this for sure... I think it has to do with not everyone being the same (personality archetypes). For some people, this will totally fucking work, for someone like me... It just completely kills my motivation and ability to (honestly) smile when talking to others.. when I anticipate that everything will be unpleasant, I can't bring myself to even getting excited for anything "good"... Some will think it naive, or an inability to see the point being made here. No. I just don't think it's applicable to everyone equally.
