The reason you’re so socially awkward (and how to fix it) 

You absolutely nailed it with this topic. when I was in high school, I cared so much about what others thought of me, and once I graduated, I realized that it was a complete waste of energy. I didn't see about 99% of those people ever again but I wasted so much energy worrying what they thought. Keep up the good work brother, a lot of young men and teens need your advice.

Really needed to hear this man I suffer from social anxiety and fear of rejection so much that it has impacted me so much

Damn, "be the person you want your best friend to be" I think thats awesome advice. I've been struggling with this alot lately, it's my graduation year and I still don't feel like I have any footing socially

I've been so nervous in school I was autistic, I thought that because I never spoke to anyone, and my face going red was a shitty thing. Anytime I get called on in class or speak up I turn into a nervous wreck. To see this video makes me so glad. I was ignored and told to shut up whenever I spoke to anyone by two bullies, and gave up making conversation. I would stay awake till 3 in the morning watching shorts, knowing that there was something better but never doing it. Everything about like just sucked. I'm doing only slightly better now, I still go red speaking to people most times. But glad it isn't at all what I thought it was. Thank you.

What's really crazy is that I'm actually struggling to vibe in with my friends and I found this video randomly! Such a coincidence, and it helps out a lot!

I weirdly stopped caring about what other people might think about me.

“You Attracted who you are” this was Amazing, Thank You!

When you learn how to make friends it comes the time to understand who are the true ones..

Needed this. Going through a dark time where i feel im not good enough for the people around me and sometimes i wish I could just start over. I have social anxiety and i feel i have no true friends and the only person i trust is my loving gf. Thanks for helping me through these teenage years (im 14 btw)❤

Being a self improvement RU-vidr myself I relate to this a lot. When I first started I was so anxious and didn't want anyone to know. Overcoming that fear has helped me so much. Keep up the good videos bro

i may not be your targeted audience because im woman but you have still helped me and thats all that matters. i feel like i dont fit in at school and im on journey to find myself so then i can be the bestfriend that i want. i see my friends starting to drift away and i question myself "who do i call my friends?". anyways im trying to not chase after others and i did end up making a friend this year because of classes and that just feels much better after "losing" these other friends that i didnt even really have a connection to.

Really needed this man, went to a new school in a new city and have been there for 6 months now and still haven't made any friends. Feels good to knos you're not alone in this

Thanks jak. With your help and gods I have defeated my hub addiction and I am losing weight and building muscle by the way I lost 20 kg in 4 months. I don't know how but I did but I did all this so I can go on a date with a girl from my church. Thanks man

I almost cried from this video. Jak, you are the reason why I keep going through those tough times, and yes, I have a porn addiction. I want to live a normal life, and that's when I found you. Same thing as you, I had one of those moments in school (1:35). I was so fucking embarrassed. I became instantly socially awkward after my moment, and this video is the reason why my social anxiety is gone now. Thank you, Jak. Here's to more supporting stories like this one. ❤

So relatable man. All that isolation during the lockdown made my brain go doomsday mode throughout high school. Been slowly regaining my identity since graduating though and your vids definitely speed up the process. Keep being awesome bro💪

“The universe rewards you with what you are and what you want.” That one cut deep. You’re awesome Jak! Keep doing what you’re doing bro! Much love from Canada! 🤘🇨🇦

Thank you so much Jak... I am touched. Whenever I tried to fit in with my friends like saying dirty jokes I didn't even understand, or share some sort of anecdote with them, it feels weird and I end up embarrassing myself all the time. I've always been worried about what every one thinks of me - the way I look, the way I converse, and the things I'm interested in like boxing or physics or jazz for example. I feel so scared to talk to people because I fear rejection, and because of that, school sucks even more than it used to and that irrational feeling doesn't enable me to engage with new people. I've always had social anxiety, and I'm also socially awkward too, and I don't like it. But this video revealed something to me. I've always wanted friends, in fact, I wanted millions of friends. But I realise, some people just aren't for me, and I'm not really for them either. This video has motivated me to explore within myself to find out who I am and feel good about myself, and I will find that person just like me! Thanks again, Jak. I've also been dealing with family problems, and school too. It's so much harder to achieve higher grades now in year 11. Please keep doing what you're doing, because whenever someone as caring as you reaches out to people like me, they'll feel like they'll have someone to go to when they're in need for a lesson in life and how they can manage themselves. If anything, someone as kind as you deserves the best friends who will benefit and guide you to the very end.

Just returned back to school and now i am just a follower or if i try to lead i just get under looked or turned down. But that kinda helps me actually focusing on school. Thanks Jak ❤

This is probably the most helpful video I've ever watched on RU-vid. I'm in Grade 9 and barely have any friends to talk to, but this video told me to just be myself and I will. And I hope to get more friends in the future Thanks brother ❤️

jak, i just wanna say you have changed my life so much. ive grown closer to god, and you have helped so amny people with there addictions its unbelievable. you need to keep doing what you doing man. you are one of the few people that wants to make change in what you see wrong with the world. and you earn a massive respect for it.

Jak thank you for this video, I’m in year 8 and I have the exact same problem. I try to fit in so hard and everyone thinks I’m annoying, and I worry so much about what people think. Keep up these videos because this is exactly what I need.

I know one thing for certain, out of the seventy people in your year, you are the wisest and most amazing person.

Sometimes God isolates you from everyone temporarily to speed up your personal growth.

I swear to god, you're saving my mental health since I found you... 🙏

Ty for this topic, I relate to your mindset so much. We as a generation rly need to support each other no matter what follow your passions and your dreams ❤🔥🫡 you don’t need to fit in it’s going to be ok

Jak, tbh I needed this video, I could never socialize and I was always awkward and could never communicate to the older seniors and juniors, I thank you so much for this vid brother.

Thank you Jak. I'm on year 9 and struggling with fitting in at school. I hope I do have a brother in the future and I will put in the effort.

hey Jak, you really saved my life, i was really on the ground, and then i saw you and now i am training, learning and a lot of other good stuff, Thanks! greetings from Switzerland Demian

This literally applies to me so much! Thanks so much Jak! U really are improving people’s lives!

"worrying about worrying does not matter" maybe the best quote you made👍🏻❤

How the hell could you explain my life right now in the first minute

Wow…this is it…finally someone’s story that I can relate to,and it’s no one unfamiliar but the chad himself whom I watch almost every time he uploads and has saved others’ and my life.

Thank you so much man. I'm glad I can relate. I suffer from social anxiety, overthinking, low-self esteem. We need more videos man I love the content. You're an inspiration. Can you answer a question for me? I don't know what to do and need advice. My parents consistently belittle me and I have a low-self esteem because of it. What should I do? They force me to do things that I don't want to do.

I am so glad I found your channel today. Never stop, man. Cheers from Hungary

I don't know how Jak can make videos that we all can perfectly relate to. This is what i need because the exact same thing is happening to me, i'm becoming the quiet one. I Think a bunch of other people will also appreciate this video man, thank you for making it. Much love keep helping others ❤❤❤

Extremely relatable, i'm on break right now and this has gotten my hopes up high, Thanks Jak

You are actually an amazing human! It feels so good to listen to someone of nearly the same age. I completed high school a month ago and the last two years have been so hard. I had a new set of students in my class and it was really hard to bond. I couldn't make friends until the last few months of school. Ironically, it wasn't that bad. I could have had more happy memories and better mental health if I went out and talked to my classmates. They on the other hand assumed I was a weird nerd coz I did hang out a lot with a toxic classmate, lol. It's just a small talk, a few minutes, to feel like you're not alone. Trust me one guy said on the graduation day, that he didn't know I was so sweet and fun, else he would have definitely talked to me. He did invite me for a parting get together which was so much fun... I was jealous, angry, anxious and ruined thinking about how others had super good times with people, and I just thought about people judging me and lived a fake life, which hurts so bad cuz I have this thought stuck in my mind: I didn't spend my childhood well. Thinking back, people did try including me in everything, but I didn't open my damn mouth and stayed invisible most of the time. I wasn't socially awkward before, but the COVID, introspection, loneliness completely ruined me. On the other hand I found out I had both types of ADHD. I was hard on myself and though I introspected, it never really helped me. But now fortunately I'm clear and people like you just guide me to the right path when I'm confused. I feel I'm still finding what my real identity is. Keep learning and smiling and helping others out in their lives! Thank you dude!

How? I joined a new school, and this is the exact thought that came in my mind, the exact topic of this video. Brother you are super relatable, and when I get any of these negative thoughts, one of your vids pop up covering the exact same issue. It feels as if I have an older brother guiding me, and it feels nice. Keep up the good work bro

i needed to hear this. I’m going through the exact same thing, and you have really changed my perspective. thanks bro ❤

Thanks Jak,I really appreciate your advice as your feelings and story is really relatable to me and I’ll hopefully enjoy my life with your advice

Bro im going through the same just following the 'cool kids' and trying to be one myself. But they just ignore me and talk about stuff that i have no knowledge about, and often im left alone. Thank you so much for this vid, ill be my best self and i hope ill have the friend who can 'take a bullet for me' in my last few years of high school 🙂

Thank you G, finally found a bother/content creator who I can relate to thank you so much G, you really have been helping me out a lot, thank you again!!!!!!!

Dude holy crap you have no idea how much I needed this thank you so much!

You and hamza helped me change my life, it’s been 2 months and 4-5 months since I wanted and motivated to start, Thank You both and Godbless you.

He feels like such a brother to me. He may have completely different skin colour, eye colour and hair than me, but he helps me so much. Thank you Jak

This was so helpful. You don't know how many lives you are changing!

"I felt like i was following them" that is so relatable

this guy is soo relatable, thank you for this.

It’s wild to me how deeply advice that we’ve already heard before can hit so much harder when there’s the right person telling it to you

Brother Jake, I've only one thing to say. Thanks. I really needed this type of advice. Was extremely confused what to do. Although I already knew some parts of this video. This really gave me so much hope and more clarity. thank you so much brother.

Awesome video, so true ❤ Jak your the best man

This came at the right time, hope the best for you brotha

Hey Jak, I've been watching your videos for a while now, I've always been into fitness, sports, running, things like that. But you are the main one who got me into working out myself. I used to be quite skinny I'm not gonna lie to you and I always did sports and had a really fast metabolism, so I always said to myself well I'm not going to put on weight so I may as well not try. But you came along and you changed me. I've been working out for a few months now at home with dumbbells, and it's changed my life. I actually enjoy working out, it isn't just a chore for me like many other people say it will become. I have become a lot bigger (well probably average size for my age, I am 15, 16 in June), more muscle, I have become a lot more confident as well, speaking to more people, especially girls, although I am not doing anything about that until I fully sort myself out, and become a good version of myself that I enjoy seeing. There is this one girl at the moment, but I have only a few months until I go to college and I don't think she is going to my college so that would be a waste of time. But enough of the rambling, I just wanted to thank you so much, you have changed my life so much and I'm really grateful, I would love to maybe chat with you one day about this, things like this and just life in general, but I'm not sure how that would happen, but if you want to give it a go, I would love it Again, thank you so much, you have really changed my life for the better. I know you may not see my comment, but I just wanted to show my love and appreciation.

love your content man. keep changing young people's lives 🫡

Jak is the most positive person I've seen on social media

Thank You man I really needed to hear this.

Please keep making videos bro , they are very inspiring and helpful ❤️❤️🙏🏽 appreciate you brother

0:31 especially when i know that people are staring at me but they just won't stop. been like that since i've been bullied in school (3-4 grade) 3:54 that's the struggle.. i am being myself but i'm also not.. i don't know if i am myself or not.. i always stutter when people talk to me and forget everything in my mind, always overthink, and that all started at 4-5th grade where my head hurt every single freaking day i couldn't take it anymore. i have diarrhea almost every day at school because of the stress of just not knowing where to go, not having anyone to talk to, being scared to ask for something and everyone calls me weird infront of everyone and when i'm sitting somewhere in the corner everyone's like "yo guys theres this weird quiet guy in that corner over there" like can't they just leave me the fuck alone and work on their shit they gotta do? work isn't just gonna do itself. i've been diagnosed with autism and possibly ADHD and anxiety too but that's not clear so i don't think there's another "me".. it's just who i am can anyone help somehow? i think about every single point in this video, i know he's right but i knew what he's gonna say before watching the video already so nothing helps. what do i do? since i moved out and changed schools where i was going to for 2 years everything was just fucked. i had many friends, was a nice and really smart, creative, funny, open, interested/interesting and unjudgeful person was the most popular kid in my entire school and everybody liked me. in kindergarten we we're seperated, 1 group upstairs 1 downstairs. we always argued for no reason between each other because they got treated better than us (which is pretty funny to me now) but when we actually got to know each other we we're really chill with each other and had many things the same so we became friends very quickly.. and my sister was the most popular girl in school so that's pretty funny altough she says she was kind of an "asshole" back then to people but they didn't know any better which i can understand but i was nice and i know that. at times abused my power but not really in a mean way, i was just the center of attention and could decide what we do (my class) in creative ways, not just "we're gonna play this and if you don't want to, cry about it" never did that luckily. now, 4 years later we and some of the other kids in my first school (1-2 grade) met again and i realised just how different i am and how badly they treated me.. no greeting or suprise of seeing each other again after so long and they instantly thought i'm weird and made fun of me constantly for who i am, what i do and what interests me. "you shouldn't care what they think" i'm very sensitive so i can't just ignore someone and pretend they don't exist. if something sad, meaningful or embarassing happens i'm gonna think about it for a while. from best friends to completly different people acting like we've never met. introverted introvert who seems emotionless to others sitting in a weird way and a extroverted, open minded, judgeful and emotionally immature person who doesn't think about what others think or feel. basically going around empty minded. man just how can something change so much, so many memories even more from 1-2 grade than 3-7. i'm always like "don't worry about it just we're a happy and good person that's all that matters".. if i just wouldn't have moved out i just wouldn't be like this, everything'd be okay i would be happy and positive, open minded , wouldn't have constant depressive mood swings and smart, now i look like a fucking jerk. i've met my very best friend/s a while back and i could get along with them, they were a little different but they accepted me for it and didn't have a problem with me about it at all.. they always told me how one of my friends really misses me but we haven't had any way to contact each other which really makes me sad to hear man. wanna meet with them again but i'm extremely nervous and i don't really know what to expect.. what if i just run out of anything to say and it's gonna be awkward for hours? i remember at my old house we lived near the city in a circle of houses with 1 garage and another big one underground where we had SO much space to play anything from tag to hide and seek.. man it was so fun i loved being outside and spending time with my friends.. now i realise how much such a feeling is worth and feel bad for not really knowing that, but i was just 4-6 years old so what would i know? still that thought just chases after me for my entire life. many memories i'd be excited to tell people but i feel like no one values it as much or doesn't even care about it unlike me who's very emotional and likes thinking about old memories.. but i also don't as it kind of makes me depressed, more and more overtime. not sure how i'm gonna make anything as an adult i didn't write any of this sentimentally or to develop empathy from other people because of "acting" depressed, just my way of expressing myself and i like writing about my views of life and experiences especially thinking about all the memories in my head while writing even though no one's gonna see this anyway.

Jak, i have been watching a few videos ( maybe 3 or more ) but i can relate to your videos too man. I wish i could meet you bro, keep up the great work brother.

I needed most..I feel lonely even when my friends around me. thank you brother

Jak you helped me fulfill my self improvement skills. I feel I'm getting better every single day. God bless you! ❤

Main point: stop ruining urself by trying to be someone ur not and tyring to fit in with ppl who dgaf abt you, and be urself

thanks man,i started studying from home in the beginning of November because i want to pass my exams,but some friends fell off,and i go to the city centre only 1 time a week to meet up with them,but i don’t seem to find my true best friend ,and it really hurts that theres no one to truly rely on.i guees i should start focusing more on myself and yeah,social anxiety increased a lot since i stopped going to school every day.everyone who read that,have a good day!

Thank you so much, I really needed to hear this.

I needed this, this is exactly what I struggle with. Thank you a lot.

thx bro. I needed this video.

You're a real one for that 🗣💯

Bro.... seriously I am facing the same issue.....and literally I can relate to you because the things you said, I am going through it till today......but now you gave me so much motivation..... seriously I am searching many videos about this but neither helped me.....but this is the video I needed...... thanks a lot bro......🙏

I know it’s a month after you posted I still want to let ya know that you had some incredible advice. I am in a very similar boat as you were before, and I look up to that. Thanks my g

Thank you for making a video on this i really needed to see this

Thank you Jak. I hate school but I think the reason I hate it so much is because I think people judge me a lot so it gives me anxiety. This video is gunna help me so much. Thanks bro ❤️

Thanks man.... i needed this.

Wow I have thought about this all day long, feeling like I don’t fit in. Such great timing you posted this😂 Jokes aside, this video gave me a lot to think about. Thank you 🙏

I used to fell like this last year, but this year when school started I found and made some great friends, really happy about it

I know I am late but thanks so much for this video. I can definitely relate and I know what I must do now. Thank you 😊

Thank you SO much, my social life is dead and i get judged all the time, but this helped me so much, thank you brother

I'm literally in this exact situation right now... especially the turning red part lol. I've never really heard someone talk about worrying about worrying, this helps a lot💪 I really appreciate the video, thankyou

Hi Jake I will be turning 16 years nest month I have been following you since last two months. I got inspired by you and today finally I decided to take a cold shower. This feels so good and I'm proud of myself.

Thanks a lot for this bro. Your videos just bring a smile to my face

Thanks I really needed this video ❤

I was just thinking about this. Perfect timing!

This is educational and helpful at the same time when it comes to have very few friends Tysm and keep it up brother😊

Bro i probably don’t have any social anxiety nor any trouble making friends but DAMN i love your vids and just like to watch so i won’t skip this one either bro!!!

I'm 15 my friends started to fade away to be with the cool guys, the one hanging out with the baddies type of thing. But the way they act now is different and I look at it disgusted every time they just don't have respect for people anymore and don't share my values all they think about is themselves and if they look cool in front of others. Luckily i have good affinities outside of school, people I respect and people that respects me, and for now i'm trying to be the best version of myself and listen to myself, I'm still friend with people in school you know but like you said they aren't my true brothers, those one are outside school, my true friends. Thanks for the video, I'm happy to see I'm not alone for this.

I am 25 and I spent most of my elementary and middle school time hiding my real self and trying to be someone else to fit in, I can assure you guys it ain't worth it. All those people don't care and they will forget you even exist at the end of the day, nowadays I am filled with regret and lost myself in the way, I forgot who I really was and it drains my soul to this day, I spent years just wandering around like a droid in autopilot mode because I was so lost and that lead to even more bad decision making that ruined my life and made me feel even more regret in the end. PLEASE BE YOURSELVES, you are better off alone than being surrounded by fake or temporary friends. Don't make the same mistake I did.

Hey man! Thanks for making those videos! They truly help me to think and concentrate of things what rly matter! Thanks!

Hey man I’ve been here since 5k and you’ve really helped me, you’ll probably never read this. But idk really love what you do!

You should make a video about things you can do instead of just sitting around. Keep the great work up!

the beginning of this video really resonates with me. i've got 'friends' but only two or three actually real mates. I mean it's easy to be in a group, but its hard to actually be accepted or an actual part of the group. I've got a fresh start when i join the ADF next year, and i'm not going to put myself into that same situation again.

Your channel is amazing and helps so many people keep it up👍🔥

im socially awkward too but ive been trying to change that recently by talking to more people and just being myself. thx for ur advice bro

Damn bro I really needed to hear that. Thank you for making these videos! I'm 15 and in the exact same situation you were in❤

I'm currently 15, and ive recently started watching your videos. I'm not joking, but you've changed how i've viewed the world. From p*** adiction to life lessons, it's changed the gears in my head its insane (In a good way). Truly thank you Jak, for guiding me on a better path of life.

a best friend is a brother from different mother🗣🗣🔥🔥🔥

I’ve always been a very two-faced person, right? Don’t really know when it started, but I just adapted a mindset that I could maybe just be hated by no one, if I become a different personality each time, meaning that no one would bully me, so I could just feel better about myself. To be honest with you, that was a huge mistake, and I’m so used to doing that, that now I barely even know who I am as a person. I’ve slowly gotten better at trying to be what I think “myself” is.

Thank you so much I can relate to literally everything you were saying and you tips have already helped me so much so again thank you❤

Jak, I think maybe you were watching me back when I was 15or $.16. All the things you shared, fit me quite well. Thank you 1 million for sharing this Since I’m sure there are many others that are insecure and going through the same kind of feelings that you had - and there’s nothing wrong with that. However, being naïve like I was, I didn’t realize that until I was older. Thanks again for your message, and all your postings, because they are most helpful, not only to me, but I know many many others. God’s blessings. vg

I have completely lost myself. If have no real friends, obviously there’s people I talk to, but outside of school I pretty much do nothing. I am so lost and don’t know what to do. This video has helped with my perspective on social anxiety but I still have no idea what to do about my crippling loneliness. I rarely comment on videos and rarely open up, but this channel just seems so uplifting. I have been going to the gym consistently for a couple months now, but I still can’t deal with the feeling of loneliness and that I’m just going to wither away. I have lost my hobby of playing music and now I want to quit baseball too. I don’t even know what to do anymore to make me happy.

Yeah I struggle really bad with social anxiety. My problem is I expect so much out of my life for no reason. I wish I could just be me without letting the fact that im not "cool" bother me so much. We all day dream time to time about being that person who everyone likes and looks up to. But think of those type of people. They usually are narcissistic and don't really care about anyone but themselves. It is always most important to be humble and genuine than to be that "cool" guy. Thank you this was the best video I've seen on this topic so far :)

Usually these types of videos don’t hit me but this did