The Seven Deadly Sins: Wrath | Belief It Or Not 

Was my mum for us. Anger and wrath was her middle name. She drove our family apart. I no longer speak to her, dad and my sibling. Yet I'm the one whose angry and filled with wrath 😂😂😂😂😂

@@Reevay762 my grandma on my mother's side is the same. She was the most a busive, evil, vindictive person I've ever known and no one has been able to top her as of yet (hopefully never). My mother and I cut contact when I was 15 but she still attempts to get into contact with me and stalks my IG and other socials.

That last line was absolutely chilling.

that story escalated constantly

This comment took the wind out of me. I hope you and your family are healing now

I am so sorry that happened, and Holy fuck your anger is valid.

You don't forgive? *SO. FVCKING. WHAT 🥰😇!* It = your life & your world❤🥰😇! Recover & prosper in the *best* way you can for *you!*

@@jackieade6599 Thank you so much - I appreciate you! 💖 I ended up taking that same brother into my home in 2017, because on the day my mother died she cried and begged me not to let him be homeless. He was homeless and in active addiction; injecting heroin/fentanyl and meth several times a day. He stole from us, treated me like garbage, and when my ex-husband found out that he was living with us and my daughter found his stash, he went to court and got full custody of her. Dude just keeps ruining my life.

I am so sorry you had to go through that.

Shame on those adults who didn’t protect you. 😢

Wow, Christmas! Just a week away!

@@mildlyinvested2992 I actually know a handful of tricks for mentally calculating the days until Christmas based on the date. Before July I do 365 - (total number of days in the past and current month) + (25 - day of month). After, I do (total number of days in the remaining months of the year) + (25 - day of month). The neat part about it is that it means it gets easier and faster to calculate the closer you get to Christmas, which is just a week away! Can you believe it, guys? Christmas, just a week away! It got here so fast! Christmas is in a week! I am so happy about this information!

And don’t forget we are somehow supposed to created in his image on top of all that

No hate like Christian love

Another example of humans being these meek pitiful creatures whose only purpose is to bend, break and obey. It's fascinating how the Bible manages to make anything you do or think somehow be against God's will (even when himself does said thing with 0 remorse)

Ngl I never got the stoicism of the Jedi. It's so repressive

@@Illitha Because the Jedi are most likely based on orders of monks, who were Christian.

@@Illitha the Jedi were the ultimate status quo warriors. Their society fell into fascism because they tried to conserve it

@@Illitha that's part of the message of the prequels. Their repressive tendencies are what led anakin to be so easily manipulated by someone who told him he didn't have to live that way, regardless of what he had to do to leave it.

@@AzureTheAvian Ehh.. they don’t really have a god tho. Just the force.

As everythings a hashtag now, everyone's trying to make a buzzword, here in Germany there's like a little campaign that equates hate with racism n homophobia and I'm so annoyed by it. I got a feeling most of the folks that tried to mess with the guy with the funny beard weren't above feeling hate and that was good.

@@gur262 by, “funny guy with a beard,” do you mean Hitler, or someone else? Hitler had a funny mustache but no beard, but I’m not sure who else you might mean when you say, “it’s good to hate him.” If you did mean Hitler, then yes, it was good that people hated Hitler.

@@gur262hey dude what do you mean by funny beard guy

@@gur262 Well....racism and homophobia IS hate so I'm not sure what point you're trying to make here...

@@jenniferhiemstra5228 but it's not all that hate encompasses.

And you know that the cycle keeps going further and further back with your mom and her mom and the mother before that, and the father before that and the mother before that. I hope that as much as it’s a heavy burden to bear that you can break that cycle people are afraid of the rocking of the boat. But you can only take so much

Narcissistic people are soft little cowards. Too weak to face themselves but will never tolerate their treatment they give to others given back to them

I'd like to say it's nice to see other people dealing with the same shit I am but it's really not. It took me years to realize my mom was taking out her anger over being constantly abused in every way by her parents until she actually said to me that she never sexually abused me, so all the other abuse was okay. She cut all this garbage out of her life to survive her lungs breaking down and the last thing I ever heard from her was yelling at everybody. Even when she wasn't yelling, she was quick with some insult or complaint, incapable of saying anything nice. I had to let everyone else look after her in a house with almost ten people in it because my own partner was also dealing with horrific health problems that actually physically killed her for several minutes, and I had to take her to one of only two hospitals on the planet capable of doing the procedure that could save her. My mom bitched me out for having priorities beyond her when she had half a dozen people waiting on her hand and foot because it wasn't enough. She never cut out anger, and I'm sure she died blaming everyone else for it. And it didn't even end there.

It's uncomfortable to have to face the reality of injustices, I understand why people end up like that. But for them to constantly profess their care and concern for others is very hypocritical. I agree, such a powerful statement

"I must confess that over the last few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate... who is more devoted to "order" than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice." - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., abridged There is a reason there is a whole field of conservative voices insisting their bigotry and oppression is born from logic and insisting on "proving" it by "debating" unprepared random people. Inevitably they then make a show of keeping cool while deliberately trying to provoke an angry or passionate response, and the instant their opponent gets angry they declare victory for being the smart logic boy who isn't driven by emotion. They demand civility, spout uncivil things in a calm tone, and then frame those seeking justice as the unreasonable aggressor for not limiting their methods of direct action exclusively to having infinite debates calmly with bad faith actors.

If you ignore the smoke you don't have to put out the fire

No one should feel pressured or obligated to “forgive” their abuser. The victim is not at fault here, the abuser is. If you don’t feel comfortable being around your former abuser, even if they have truly reformed, that’s perfectly fine.

I had an explosion in anger when I left religion as it can only be bottled up for long. First of all I wrote it out on paper or typed it out on a portable typewriter then spoke of it I didn't have a computer then. Something has to give and if I hadn't left then & there who knows what I would have done. I was always distracting myself at home from the memories and emotions that came up. Then I would go somewhere new by myself & then it would come up.

If "not forgiving someone" is a sin, than it's technically a sin to not forgive the victim for not forgiving the persecutor. In other words the persecutor is committing yet another sin if they don't forgive the victim for not forgiving them.

@@lemsip207 I was angry after I made the final break from my abuser. Like, _angry_ angry. It was _years_ of bottled up anger at the ex, at the thoroughly useless police, at the system that continually failed, and most of all, at myself, for putting up with it.

ancient DARVO tactics

This made me tear up. Thank you for sharing.

No therapist will ever tell you to piss in their cars AC. Or maybe they will? Confidentially.

Good for you, homie. That's one of the main reasons I left AA - they tried to tell me I needed to get rid of my "resentments" and "defects of character". I felt so much better when I realized there was nothing wrong with me. Of course I resent my mother - she molested me! Of course I resent my father - he emotionally abused and financially exploited me and my siblings! F**k them, I don't forgive them, and knowing I don't have to is so empowering.

@@jakethepillowsnake5302 I was bullied into going to AA for a while, but couldn't buy into the cult. I already hated myself enough at that point, and didn't need to add public shaming to my already heavy self-imposed workload of ego-abuse and self-abasement before a cruel and distant "higher power". Turns out my alcoholism "miraculously" went away pretty easily once the underlying problem finally started getting addressed, but I had to come out as trans to do that, which required defying church teachings by turning to "secular" medicine and psychiatry for help. I really wish I could "protest" by continuing to attend the services, but they're the kind of Christians who act like they're too sensible and disciplined and "above it all" to react to anyone's anger. I just end up getting "triggered" by the sermons, without managing to elicit any response or engagement, even to debate the Biblical passages about gender. So frustrating! 😾

Facts!

Yeah well, a lot of 'em are knowingly defending and perpetuating the injustices. Because they think they're right.

Exactly

My old violin teacher told me whenever I’d apologize “don’t say sorry if you’re just going to make the same mistake again” and I’ve lived by that advice ever since lol

My mom be like:

You know my in-laws? XD seriously, just add beating you over the head with religious topics, then shut any argument you make down because they don't go to church. Okay, so you don't get to yell at me in the middle of a packed hospital cafeteria about me not baptizing my child. My mom disagreed, but didn't try to publicly shame me the way my teachers did. So she wonders why I avoid them, but this is exactly why. They wait until their son is gone, attack, then get mad it takes me YEARS before I'll tolerate them again. Family is supposed to forgive, but it only goes one way.

Thats narcissistic control.

Exactly what I was thinking when that pastor talked about his "righteous anger" road rage

This is such an insightful comment. Thanks!

@@craneoflores HAHAH. This is all the proof you need. These people should *not* be in any kinda of power, ugh.

Sometimes they're even totally explicit about that being the case, especially if they talk about their theology surrounding "God's wrath"

@@craneoflores Both of you that’s pretty much the one

I still have to vocally remind people that I’m allowed to be angry about things. Obvi I’m not allowed to hurt people because I’m angry, but I’m for damn sure allowed to feel my feelings

I was told that anger was bad and that I shouldn't get angry. It was never explicitly said but it was implied that it was "unbecoming of a woman" to be angry. F**k that sh*t.

Honestly I feel like I've had to suppress my feelings of anger for so long because it wasn't allowed, I had to relearn how to feel and accept those feelings when they came up again.

god same. so much repressed anger that exploded in high school

@blossonqueerie2284 ♡♡♡♡ Only realised I was ALLOWED to be angry LAST YEAR • I'm 49... So Much ❤️L♡VE❤ to you, & the very best wishes. XO

Had a nun try to kidnap me starting at 6. I should probably forgive the monster, but I'd rather spite watch for her obituary and say ''ding dong the witch is dead'' It's not a sin to be angry over others sinning against you. Especially if it was going on long enough they had plenty of time to correct their actions. Eight families later, she hit one with enough money to sue for her harassment. And won. She was no longer allowed to work with children, and thank God. She brainwashed me into isolating myself, because she turned me against my family, and made me see any slight as abuse. We were encouraged to report every time we were put in a corner an encouraged to claim we were slapped and spanked more than we were (I don't agree with my parents methods, but finding out how they were raised showed how much they improved from their experience) Took me 30 years to understand the gravity of the situation, and makes me sick to see similar tactics used to push religion into politics and hide it as ''not religious '' in people who don't go to church, but think is Bible is all truth even though they've never read it.

Basically, when most pastors talk about “forgiveness” & the “sin of anger”, it’s really just gaslighting & victim-blaming. Absolutely disgusting stuff.

🫂

Hope you are healed. I know plenty of guys like this at my old church. They still are 'leaders'. Delusional!

@@chriscortez2036 Because they want to make the victims shut up and not cause problems. They do not care about victims, they just care about perpetrators getting in trouble.

If she cared so much about you forgiving someone for her death, she should have been willing to acknowledge what you wanted if you had died. The only consistency seems to be that she wants what she wants, other’s wants be damned. I’m sorry you had to deal with that.

Who is forgiveness for? My answer is in general and not specific to your situation. The enablers who enable abuse. They don't want to have bad things happening around them. They don't like it when everyone isn't getting along. They don't want to acknowledge someone they look up to or admire could do something bad. They want to think positively and believe everyone is good, didn't mean it or makes mistakes. They think you must give second chances is something you have to do because of this. It is uncomfortable to have to help a victim, hold the abuser accountable and deal with relationships falling out. Even just the tension in the room between two people who don't like each other can be uncomfortable. And raising issues of abuse, or in this case murder, is uncomfortable to hear about or acknowledge. And of course the victim has to apologies and forgive the abuser because the abuser isn't going to change and will make things uncomfortable for everyone when held accountable. They don't want to "set them off" because that's uncomfortable. And when the victim refuses to forgive, sets appropriate boundaries or does anything else that disrupts the social harmony, the enabler is angry at the victim for having them feel uncomfortable. If only the victim forgave and got over it, then it wouldn't now be the enablers problem. Being told to forgive isn't about the victim or those around the victim. It is so that the enablers do not have to face an uncomfortable reality, so they don't have to feel uncomfortable themselves and so they can move on and go back to how everything suited themselves. So in should selfishness and selfcentredness. Enablers are just as bad as abusers IMO. Their weapon of choice is gaslighting from the "they didn't mean it like that," " It was just a joke," "you are being too sensitive," to "it's time you got over it and move on," "you should forgive, it's a sin not to forgive." There is probably also an element of doing what is considered right and avoiding what is considered wrong. For people of faith right and wrong is based on what the scripture says and the priest interpretation. Unfortunately a lot of good people get caught up in this which adds to the enablers and supports abuse, even if they don't mean to. This isn't about avoiding uncomfortable situations, it's about trying to be a good person and doing what they were raised as being considered right. For your specific situation it could be you mother wants things her way so it doesn't matter what your deathbed wishes are. I think also there is an element of it doesn't matter what each of you personally want, the book says it's right to forgive and it's a sin not to. And from her perspective, she didn't bring you up to sin so you must forgive. And she won't do the wrong thing therefore she too will forgive.

​​@@ksara2883 Exceptionally well put.

It’s simple. Religion is simply put, a fleeting attempt at moral superiority. You are (essentially) in a country club for the afterlife. Nearly each one tends to tell you that for some heinous reason, YOUR people in YOUR region of the world chose correct! Wohoo, you’re the winners! So say your priests/whatever they’re called. But that’s just the thing, it’s only them *saying* that. There’s no real difference, only imaginary, to pit us against each other. With this thought now in mind, it can be clearly seen that through every religious meeting/gathering, all the higher ups will do for the commoners is bolster them with lies and bullsh*t. Stories of how their god is better than everyone else, how they’re better than everyone else, seeds a deep and hard to uncover thought in all of their brains, that they ARE truly “better” for getting picked by their version of afterlife santa. This also bleeds into forgiveness. Since they think (but won’t say) that they’re morally superior to everyone, it’s THEIR forgiveness that’s required in any situation. They never really bother to check who the forgiveness is meant to come from, as being indoctrinated so early usually results in a large lack of critical thinking skills. To sum up, no one is better than anyone else, yet religion seems to preach the opposite.

Forgiveness should be a reward for providing restitution for a third party you've harmed. NOT a requirement for you to give restitution

Wow, misophonia sounds awful. I mean, I get badly irritated by things like music playing over and over and over (I'm frequently trying to escape the company of young children or people scrolling tiktok) and that's difficult enough. Having to deal with extreme rage triggered by sounds must be unimaginably worse. Anger should never be shamed. It's a painful enough emotion on its own.

@@Newfiecat thanks for the understanding. Anger is such a hard emotion (for me at least) to express; it’s nice to hear from people who understand.

I went through the same thing, you are not alone❤️

you have this too?? my family is catholic (i will probably never be able to them i dont believe anymore) and my mom shames me for not liking chewing sounds. i literally want to cry when i have to listen to anyone chew or swallow anything and its so bad but its MY fault??? she doesnt even try to understand and yet she preaches she's an "expert on psychology" like thats such BS. cause then id know for sure that you do understand and ugh, im just glad its not just me. sometimes i feel like an alien

that's absolutely horrendous that you were forced to go through all of that, my condolences for having the misfortune of a shit pastor and awful mother and I hope both you and your son are safe

Hate that you had to go through that. Wish you and yours all the best♡♡

Try not to think of your son as the boy with rapist genes. He needs the best mom in the world so that he grows up to be better. Keep the anger on everyone else but him. Good luck.

Genes might not be responsible for that trait. It's YOUR child, not theirs, try to remember that. Nurture over nature right, it doesn't mean they will be like the guy. I don't say that to diminish anything you went through and are still going through because I have had experiences with SA in the past so it's like not something that ever leaves you like I get that, but there's no guarantee the kid is going to be like that a******, especially if they aren't in the picture to copy behaviors from. I hope that gives you some hope in this.

I am sorry that happened to you. Hope you are free of both mother and pastor, and that your son is not influenced by his sperm donor in any way.

There's a nuance that doesn't get, you can forgive someone and not let them back in to ones life... it's called the person that did the harming is facing the consequences for their actions... hope that makes sense.

@@tomgames8616 forgiveness isn't a choice and not everyone can forgive. To me remaining "unforgiving" (at least by Christian standards) is what keeps me safe from letting people who hurt me back into my life when they have absolutely no intention of changing. Yes it makes sense, but it doesn't work that way for everyone

@@sassylittleprophet sometimes people are unable to forgive and not being forgiven would be the consequence for who ever did the harming. It's not as black and white as christian standards make it out to be or would like it to be.

@@tomgames8616 exactly! It's like grey areas don't exist with the majority of Christianity.

Isn't it how abusive relationships operate? To threaten you with them being the only ones, so you should always keep them unaccountable to their actions?

well to be fair hate and anger arent the exact same thing

I think I know exactly what you're talking about? When I was in (public!) High school we had a seminar about forgiveness. It was incredibly Christian, they gave us two books. One was "She Said Yes", a memoir about a columbine victim who allegedly refused to denounce her faith, and another book that I'm blanking on but gave many stories of people who were only to forgive by accepting Jesus into their hearts. Such a bizarre presentation

Anything related to religious counseling is just a HUGE RED FLAG. The god business is BAD BUSINESS. 💰 🤑

They do so much to demonize the people who cut toxic influences out of their lives but "forgiveness" isn't going to do jack shit for you if the people who hurt you are just going to keep hurting you. Trauma has been shown to literally change the physical structures in your brain. "Forgiveness" isn't going to bring healing from that. And in many circumstances, if "forgiveness" is going to put you back in the same situation that traumatized you in the first place, it's only going to make things worse.

As an old school metalhead I find that example totally hilarious 🤘

Newly indoctrinated to heavy metal, about 5 years ago, and I also see the hilarity. :3

And he could literally use "St Anger" as an example, a song which is about anger, when "The unforgiven" is just depressing.

@@bluester7177 Well, “St Anger” will depress your ears… But, yeah, at least it’s metal-y and has “angry” in the title.

I was listening to that song at work the other day and some kid had to of been 16/17 asked why I was listening to that old music his grandpa listens to that....... first time I felt old in my life and I'm only 38 lol

And there is your issue. Where does one draw the line? You can’t, since anger is an idea, and can be talked about in circles… as lots of evangelists do. You can’t draw the line, because there’s nowhere to draw. This allowed incredibly corrupt people in positions of power to abuse religion for whatever they please. And to be honest, if “Gods plan” was really perfect, then he planned all that child molestation and slaughter? And everyone who has ever “sinned” in a position of power, he wanted there. If there’s a god, he is either a murderous psychopath who toys with sentient being in his spare time, or is simply incompetent.

It seems to me like none of the emotions are good in their eyes but anger is useful, it can be weaponized more effectively than other emotions.

also when god does it it's good? make it make sense 🤷🏻‍♀️

Its never a coincidence with evangelicals is it

Bingo

It's also a sin when you're angry at the church, or at an abuser. It has to be, in order to be consistent when the church abuses you. Unless it's a father angry in a courtroom. Then it's a matter of getting retribution for a property violation

Tsk bingo dude

Hi. Yea, actually Gods anger at UNbelievers, allowing them into hell🔥🚒 by the BILLIONS (according to the fanatics) says a shitload about anger out of control‼️ But hey, there's a simple explanation which is God never had a mirror around to see his own angry face......... apparently........ it was the time before mirrors‼️😨

Same

It really just ends up being like, “the people that hurt you are good now, if you don’t admit they aren’t at fault then YOU’RE the bad one.” The literal opposite of how you should treat people, you have to lie about abuser’s innocence and the people they hurt, who don’t believe the lie, get all the punishment.

I've never thought of myself having religious trauma, but damned if you're right.

I’m not sure how much religious trauma I have, but in addressing my underlying beliefs about myself and the world I’ve noticed a lot of my paranoia and self doubt was backed up or even instilled by religion.

Hi. Great thing is now you have........ 'freedom FROM Christ'‼️ That's good 😀 Leave the fanatics to attempt explaining to the 'flock' that they are 'once saved always saved' BUT you can't just go around sinning because, because, WHAT❓, because God is NOT going to let you keep on sinning......... hang on here........we are 'technically still sinners' after being 'saved'. See, I have to put alot of those words in quote marks. ANYWAYS, to further add to the nonsense someone told me the other day that once you believe you don't want to sin anymore BUT if I would just sincerely confess my sins to good ole God/maybe a priest, get the 'filling'/anointing of the Holy Spit (hope it's 🍒 cherry filling) I will be fine and could expect to go to heaven and escape hell🔥🚒‼️ Well, thanks so much sir for clearing up all that nonsensical theology for me. What would I do without that (bullshit)⁉️

I mean. yeah that's what my abusive mother did, just short of the going to hell part lmao. the most ironic part is that she's a licensed therapist

@@Roman-bw2fo I feel like I lucked out with my therapists, I’ve heard of therapists like your mother and it saddens me. Cheers to trying to undo the damage 🫡

That’s so we wouldn’t know how to have our boundaries, which predators love.

I am so sorry you are going through this. Your instincts are 100% right unfortunately. You're right to keep going and never look back.

Facts! Change your dad to my mom. The story is the same. Fuck these people

You got this- I’m rooting for you and your future! 💪🥰

Forgiveness is for the weak!

You know what? *So. FVCKING. WHAT!* It's your world, your life, & your business 🤣🥰😇! I wish for a *prosperous* healing in your journey 😇. (From an offbeat X-tian 🙃🥰!)

@@Napoleonic_S this is not what i said

@@Napoleonic_S No. Despite my brother's passing, I still haven't forgiven him the way he use to abuse me. I don't have pleasant dreams of him either. He was emotionally and physically abusive.

​@@Napoleonic_S absolutely fucking not. Forgiveness is not an option in the face of abuse, in the face of manipulation, or in the face of cruelty. It's not bitterness, it's self preservation.

@@Napoleonic_S nah. You don't have to take revenge. But you should NEVER feel pressured to forgive someone. Fuck outta here with that shit. Ancient people brushed their teeth with piss and killed left handed folks

@@Napoleonic_S people had "logic" and "reasons" to think the earth was flat too, they just werent ACCURATE logic or GOOD reasons. same as how none of this shit youre saying is a GOOD reason to consider forgiving awful people who wont care nor change when forgiven. "many ancient wisdoms were good actually" cool, i dont care about how many of them GENERALLY were good, this one SPECIFICALLY is bad, so appealing to how "many" "ancient wisdoms" were on the mark means nothing.

TTTHHIIISS!!! I've wondered that since I could comprehend logic...they say if you're unforgiven of sin, you go to hell...well what if I die in a car crash and hadn't done my 'forgiveness' prayer of the day?? What then? Am I supposed to pray for it every second, hour, day....what??

@@jenniferhiemstra5228 So you'll remain in fear and doubt all your days. A useful control tactic.

Also why does he have so much wrath and why does he want to punish people so badly?

Your sins, if you are in Christ and have the Holy Spirit dwelling in you, are paid in full. God doesn’t even see you, He sees the righteous blood of Jesus on you all the time. So your place in heaven is secure after putting faith in Jesus and receiving the Holy Spirit (eternal life), and now you can focus on having a relationship with Jesus as He works on your heart and character to become more like Him 🫶🏾

@@juliee593He doesn’t even want to punish, hence why He sent Jesus and punished His son instead so you could go free. Your freedom from that punishment you rightly deserve for sinning, was paid for and came at a high cost….Jesus’ blood. But God is a righteous judge and therefore can’t overlook sin and HAS to punish it. But without Jesus, we are just humans who have sinned against an ETERNAL God. God is eternal. And therefore we deserve an ETERNAL punishment. It’s 1 to 1. So Jesus being God, His blood is ETERNAL-ly good and righteous and can pay for your eternal sin and in place, give you His own eternal life 😊

I think its something anyone raised inside a church has genuine problems with. Guilt for sin and literal thought crimes is baked into the religion. People are needed to feel guilty in the first place in order to even seek forgiveness to begin with. And I don't think it's unreasonable to say ones seeking their own forgiveness. Mark says forgive yourselves, but in all honesty, its probably more accurate to translate it to "Seek forgiveness from God and then you can forgive yourself" It skips that whole accountability phase. For me personally, accountability was always what assuaged my guilt the most. I think for some, skipping out on that accountability portion seems to good to miss out on. The psychological benefits of not confronting themselves have become to great.

i mean It can be destructive and motivating at the same time, but in long term,it can be a fatigue and exhaustion 🤔

Honestly one of the reasons why I'm so good at playing the piano today is because, when my ex best friend was jealous of my talent and tried to put me down for it and bullied me, I doubled down and practiced twice as hard out of pure spite.

Spite can move mountains, Hate can keep you warm. But, be careful to not burn all your shit down with it

@@User-pw3pu ...idk how this applies to "all my shit." I was talking about something that one, happened when I was a kid, and two, was anger used in a healthy way to cope with how I was being bullied. I know you probably mean well, but please don't give me moral lessons, they have been used so much to gaslight me and are triggering to me at this point. Thank you for your concern

@@sassylittleprophet Hey, I was responding to the OG comment. Not yours, It probably doesn't apply to you or your situation. Just sharing some random philosophy that helped me through my 20's

Angela Thank you for telling us this. I have been doing recovery work on my abuse for 30 years. It is not an easy path. Good for you on taking care of yourself. In this circle, deep peace In this circle, great happiness In this circle safety Buddhist prayer. I would say it during a recovery meetings.

“Why are you doing this to me” What the hell… that’s disgusting. It’s exactly what I was saying in another thread. When you’re a part of religion (Afterlife Country Club), you tend to think you’re “better” than everyone else. It’s a very deep seeded thought, and you have to be careful, cause they’ll never admit it. But admit it or not, when someone is raised into a culture that not only dehumanizes and vilifies other groups of people merely on belief, and praises it’s own for absolute compliance and little thinking, the now dunning-krueger effected church goers think they are morally superior to everyone around them. Like I said, this is a very deep seeded thought. Hence why your aunt didn’t say “shut up and forgive your abusers like the rest of us”, she said “why are you doing this to *me*.” Very rarely do they think of anyone but themselves. Since your horrible situation that YOU had to endure is now causing her a slight inconvenience, she shits the blame not to herself for allowing such bullsh*t and endorsing rape, but rather to you. Why? Because THEY. DONT. CARE. ABOUT YOU. Religion has done a great job of forcing its members to immediately ostracize anyone in the community who has had a bad experience with the religion. By labeling it as “sin.” Trust me angela, you committed no “sin” in your situation. And if there IS a hell? I know exactly who will be burning.

I've talked with a lot of survivors, and so rarely does a victim receive an apology. I've had my abusers constantly deny it all. If any one of them ever came forward and apologized, while I would have some appreciation for it, some things are unforgivable. Proud of you for standing your ground, especially because there was a cost paid by your other family members. It was heartbreaking when I went through something similar.

✋😩👌

I’m sorry for your bad experience. The Lord is still waiting for you and He won’t hurt you. The Bible says that no one who believes in Jesus Christ will be put to shame. God bless

@Jay-oj4hj that's cool. I spent 35 years thinking "you can't expect people to be perfect - only God is perfect" and excused their actions. I left the faith because of the teachings of the faith, not because of the people who followed it. God is not perfect - the OT god is bigoted, misogynistic and doesn't align with the definition of love found in the beatitudes. He is not perfect and he teaches people to be obedient, not moral. The bible also said Jesus was returning within his generation, but that didn't happen either. I left the faith because of god, not people. I stayed in it for most of my life out of love for a god that doesn't exist. I left because understanding comes from love, not fear.

@@apostink My friend, you are mistaken. The God of the Bible is extremely merciful. He sent His Son to die on a cross to forgive us. We deserved death, but the gift of God is salvation through Jesus Christ our Lord. And Jesus didn’t just tell us to love. He lived what He preached. He served others and His disciples, He healed many people, and He laid down His life for us on the cross. He experienced separation from the Father for our sake. And He rose again on the third day. Also, Jesus never said when He would come back. No one knows the day nor the hour. And Jesus is not slow to come back. He’s being patient and waiting for more people to repent. But He won’t wait forever. One day He will come back without delay. Don’t wait. Repent and return to the Lord before it’s too late.

​@@Jay-oj4hjThe god of the Bible killed 42 children for making fun of a bald man

​@@Jay-oj4hj blah, blah that's just Nonsense comin out there 😂 try again

I'm 41. Parents divorced at 7. I just found out a year ago my pastor father was preying on the women he was counseling. So yeah

I wouldn’t meddle in a couple’s relationship unless serious reasons (like safety) required it. If you tell someone their partner may cheat on them they won’t thank you and possibly they will hate you. This kind of interference is the best way to ruin your relationship with both so I would avoid talking about it if you care to preserve the relationship. Just my 2 cents.

@@pansepot1490 idk, a child warning about their parents terrible actions seems pretty selfless. Warning someone that a person they trust isn’t necessarily trustworthy seems like a better idea than leaving a cheater free to hurt more people. It’s not like it’s gossip or something petty; she’d be warning her almost stepmother because of what happened already to her and her mother. It seems more cruel to hide that fact from the girlfriend.

People will say it's best not to meddle. But I think it's perfectly acceptable to share facts about a person to their partner so their partner can make an informed choice. Your dad should have told his now partner anyway. If he gets angry at you because it causes issues in his relationship then your response is this should not have been a surprise coming from yourself and your dad should have told her before things got serious. No ifs or buts. She should already know. And you know what, if your dad cheats on her and everyone around this women knew of your dad's past, she is going to be wonder during why no one bothered to warned her. When we don't meddle cheaters or abusers hurt others. I didn't meddle with my ex, who was an emotional abuser. His now partner is with him with a child. She is stuck due to the kid. And that kid is being raised by my ex. She ended up contacting me to figure out how I stayed so long with my ex. Unfortunately all I could say was I was ignorant and should have left sooner. All I could send through was a domestic violence hotline and point her to available help. I left it at that. This could have all been avoided if I meddled. I thought staying out of it was the right thing. I don't see how the current situation is the right thing. The good thing is there are people in my ex's family who see through his bullshit and will support her.

I agree, cheating on your spouse makes you a bad parent. If he really lived and cared about his family, he wouldn’t intentionally do something that breaks it.

That dude is a trip, having a violent road rage incident is Positive Righteous Anger but wanting to beat someone's ass for SA'ing your kids is sinful. 🙄🙄

@@ToruKun1 I mean, that was a different pastor who had that take, and while his take was terrible, he wasn't actually going after the father there, just shaming his congregation.

Nordic death metal contributed to Norway became the peaceful civilization it is now lol

@@John-PaulHunt-lk7cz Sometimes.

Right? I cringed so damn hard. Good grief

Seriously! Ludicrous. 🤣

My condolences. I'm very sorry this happened to your mom. Awful.

Yeah, that was uncalled for. Pretty silly point to make in front of an audience.