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The Worst Thing to Say at a Party - Pete Holmes

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Pete Holmes laughs at his mom’s pronunciation of “Celine Dion” and shares a cringeworthy joke you can tell at parties. (Contains strong language.)
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Опубликовано:

2 апр 2020

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Комментарии : 365

@CanItAlready 4 года назад

Salon Dijon sounds like a great drag name for a Celine impersonator.

@ohmyblindman 4 года назад

not like a great drag name, oh, IT IS!

@insidiousfastidious6224 4 года назад

You’re funnier than this comedian is

@matthewlennhardt8408 3 года назад

Gross

@Etabobable 3 года назад

Nice one, Jaun you won 1 Jaun.

@CanItAlready 2 года назад

@Notorious 885 Clearly you don't speak for everyone.

@tonyg490 4 года назад

He looks exactly like a youth pastor lmao!

@soonexpired 4 года назад

Wait wtf you’re right! Lmaoo

@samrusoff 4 года назад

He almost became one

@odettewright2392 4 года назад

Your a really dum ase

@emiliavenka 3 года назад

He went to school for theology, he was seriously about to become a pastor, that's the real funny part!

@VibeXplorer 3 года назад

@@emiliavenka I went to the same college he went to at the same time he did. (Gordon College). He graduated a year before me, I believe. I saw him perform in the school's improv group. So weird to see him as a celebrity comedian on Comedy Central now.

@FLUMPAAY 4 года назад

I love Pete so much! He just looks like he has the best time up there and the way he cracks himself up is so pure. I wish he was more well known.

@pedrobarnez5502 3 года назад

We know.....we know

@jamesdube7627 2 года назад

That is how you recognize a great comedian, all the great ones do

@jamesdube7627 2 года назад

@@pedrobarnez5502 so sorry to hear about Norm McDonald last week, cancer if you didn't know

@mollyrose2896 Год назад

yo, the way you misused "was" had me thinking that he was dead. Had to look it up lol!

@TAD-LOW 11 месяцев назад

" i wish he was more well known" sounds like one of his bits. 😂😂😂

@willwalsh3566 3 года назад

"if that doesn't open the place where you keep your joy, maybe lube up the dial a little bit" is actually poetry

@DreadedLad88 4 года назад

I love self awareness... That's why I love comedians... People take themselves too seriously.

@emiliavenka 3 года назад

He's a borderline comedian's comedian, but he does it super well. I don't understand why he doesn't appeal to more people! It's so relatable and honest.

@idontwantahandlethough 2 года назад

Comedians tend to take themselves *very* seriously. That's why they do what they do

@spitgorge2021 2 года назад

@@idontwantahandlethough and they shouldnt

@johnokeeffe3096 2 года назад

Pete's a model for enjoying yourself on stage. The goal should be to be your own favourite comic and I think he's there!

@Trainy2 2 года назад

I think there's room for comics with many different styles. There's a lot of ways to be funny, but the key is to have your own style.

@idontwantahandlethough 2 года назад

It works for pete. Hes got a very contagious laugh and smile, I'm not a smiley person at all but I just cant help myself when I watch this dudes stand up

@jonnifjader 2 года назад

@johnokeffe ??

@glyph68 Год назад

Wayne Knightly?

@indyj29 4 года назад

That Juan joke killed me 🤣 the joke itself wasn’t funny, it was him not being able to stop laughing is what got me 😂

@ScrewlooseMS 2 года назад

“We WoN oNe JuAn”

@r4yrayx0x0 2 года назад

@@ScrewlooseMS “wE fInNaLlY oNe wOn jUaN!”

@idontwantahandlethough 2 года назад

It's one of those jokes that's so unfunny it loops back around to being funny again. It's a peak-performance dad joke

@devanshgupta7530 2 года назад

Montoya vibes

@montanaelkwhisperer1744 2 года назад

Until you realize that he wrote the joke three years ago...and he has told it forty-two times...so any laughter is faked.

@whillgaming24 2 года назад

I love how he laughs at his own jokes but he's trying so hard to keep it together

@christianmaas8934 4 года назад

Anyone who hates this guy hasnt embraced their inner dad jokes

@alecsanderfuentes3913 4 года назад

Christian Maas this dude was ass

@christianmaas8934 4 года назад

Okay "Alecsander" with your 1800s russian farmer name

@christianmaas8934 4 года назад

@@alecsanderfuentes3913 Aww did you get insecure and change your name to a dead meme? Awww

@FirstnameLastname-jz1ux 4 года назад

this is from well before pete had his baby, but he's always had strong fun-dad energy.

@jmsolano0516 4 года назад

@@alecsanderfuentes3913 he wasn't very good lol

@brockgannon9033 4 года назад

“You’re...not bad” -John Mulaney

@coryhalewilliams 3 года назад

Crashing fannnnmn

@evangelionl0vr857 2 года назад

Just finished the show and that’s what brought me here, such a goddam good show.

@GoodFormFilms Год назад

Just saw him this past weekend. He was hilarious. We actually had a heckler and he handled it so well it was the best part of the show.

@johnkinsey2478 4 года назад

This guy gives me an ‘aww shucks’ vibe.

@idontwantahandlethough 3 года назад

Hahahaha holy crap that's EXACTLY it

@machninety7334 2 года назад

“Leonardo De Pizza Place” 🤣 🤣 🤣

@TheHarrisontemple Год назад

Who wants to rap about the Lord?

@princessaur 2 года назад

The Salon Dijon joke never gets old no matter how many times he tells it lmfao.

@zackv3957 2 года назад

Pete Holmes is so underrated.

@rexasaurus3853 4 года назад

Thank you Pete for reminding me of how I don't want to be in my 30's. Keeping up spirit's....

@gamesturbator 9 месяцев назад

Big Boat Iceberg" absolutely floored me!

@cescabhi 4 года назад

Reminds me of a French dude called "jussie smouliett"

@chanteandrews849 4 года назад

🤣🤣🤣😂

@ohsoloco5113 4 года назад

If John Ritter and Zach Braff had a child...

@joshuagoslee 3 года назад

nailed it

@prestonbane4176 3 года назад

so good. I can finally stop watching his videos bc I understand now.

@ohsoloco5113 3 года назад

Funny that John Ritter actually played Zach's father on Scrubs...

@rowynnecrowley1689 3 года назад

YES!

@schmawesome4345 2 года назад

Leonardo dePizzaPlace! I am DECEASED 🤣🤣

@chemxcore 4 года назад

Halfway through and I've had to pause like 7 times to laugh my ass off!

@jamesdube7627 2 года назад

The Mc Donald's joke sealed the deal for any doubters out there

@shelbytomy07 4 года назад

"big boat iceberg" lmfao

@googleedood9721 4 года назад

Leonardo D'Pizzaplace 😂

@Mr.PepeSilvia 4 года назад

Gotta love Pete Holmes

@emilydavis162 2 года назад

Once my friend and I were listening to music and as we were getting out of their car they exclaimed “oh, is this Bjork” and they pronounced every letter with full confidence

@alex.r.891 2 года назад

Did they say it “Bee-jork” “Buh-jork” or straight up “bjork”?

@James-gs9qf 8 месяцев назад

Reminds me of a friend's mum watching Queen's performance at live aid being repeated. She said he has an amazing voice that Eddie Murphy. Bought me so much joy

@johnsmithsonian4712 Год назад

“Salon Dijon was said to me with a room with air in it.” 😂

@pearlmarley 4 года назад

Whomever is reading this remember to spread as much LOVE AS POSSIBLE, don't litter, help out the homeless and take care of nature please it's really important we gotta take care of eachother and mother earth. thank you and have a blessed life ❤

@IAmAlpacaBoi7 2 года назад

I love comedians who laugh at their own joke, because it honestly makes it better when they know "that was a good one."

@kedabro1957 4 года назад

4:45 ... This is how I felt when the 2nd Matrix movie opened with a Mountain Dew ad. An Agent was holding a bottle of Mountain Dew and ordering us to drink it.

@kokocipher685 3 года назад

oh my goodness, I can't even keep watching. The latino bit got me laughing in tears.

@PathosConsultingGroup 4 года назад

pete is so pure. wish he had a netflix or hbo special

@tommylee6262 4 года назад

He has 2 HBO specials

@specialeeffexx 2 года назад

Check out his show ‘Crashing’ on HBO! I loved it!

@PathosConsultingGroup 2 года назад

Flowering Ananda oh yeah i loved that show. i mean a stand up special

@alfiekinnies 5 месяцев назад

He finally has a Netflix special, “I Am Not For Everyone” - you should go check it out.

@jackfein8188 4 года назад

This guy is funny

@NishantrP 4 года назад

Glad to see Pete's still out here doin his thing

@FirstnameLastname-jz1ux 4 года назад

this is years old, dunno why its uploaded 3 days ago. good stuff either way.

@NishantrP 4 года назад

@@FirstnameLastname-jz1ux oh for real? That sucks

@carlosdanaalvarez1220 3 года назад

3:10 Juaaaan!!! 😂😂😂

@Rattlehead7211 14 дней назад

That's why we love you bud. Always lubing our dials.

@DKGifford19608 4 года назад

This set is McDonalds (gulp) (gulp)

@idontwantahandlethough 2 года назад

Pete is the most Mormon non-Mormon person I have ever seen

@benjaminbernard2510 3 года назад

I've never seen him perform this, just heard it. I imagined a lot more gestures and movements in my head lol

@TheBigGetEven 2 года назад

I saw the show he had a couple years ago and he grew on me over the course of the season or so I watched. But he's leveled up. Great stuff.

@michylmagdaleno6421 2 года назад

Little did you guys know this guy is the best Batman ever. He helped Christian Bale find his batman voice🤣

@aaronmarks9366 Год назад

I was looking for this comment. He's my second favorite Batman actor.

@spencergsmith 9 месяцев назад

“Donde esta las drogas?”

@dazednconfuzedsean7 7 месяцев назад

And Professor X

@sammyv9167 2 года назад

I got like 3 laugh orgasms, lost it at the youth pastor 😂😂 "who wants to rap about the lord" 😂😂 Juan, we won one Juan 😂😂😂 this stand up sure was McDonald's

@jonnifjader 2 года назад

@sammvY Thanks for the recapitulation....

@tcknapp1984 2 года назад

"Big boat iceberg " I'm fucking done

@abdicated7800 4 года назад

For those that like Pete. Check out his Pete Show monologues. Fucking gold mine of comedy

@fellowdanbarber3323 2 года назад

No, it's not. It's bland, safe, and fucking corny. Iff this is "gold", wtf am I supposed to call Eddie Murphy's "RAW"? Foh.

@floopusdoopus 2 года назад

3:03 is one of my favorite jokes of all time

@theragingcreeper9040 4 года назад

I miss the pete Holmes show

@victoriasimmons2078 Год назад

Lol! My mum called Elon Musk, Alan Husk once. I've never called him anything else since! 😂

@cronussaturn8558 Год назад

😂😂😂

@cloudbloom Год назад

Pete seems like the best friend you'll ever have he's great

@travistaylor4342 2 года назад

Why this guy has not blown up yet r atleast have his own show is beyond me dudes funny asf and it's clean comedy which is hard to do

@Tonyhouse1168 10 месяцев назад

He had a show. And no one watched it.

@Tonyhouse1168 10 месяцев назад

And he literally said “f*ck you sir” in this clip

@travistaylor4342 10 месяцев назад

@@Tonyhouse1168 you need to cool ur jets

@thebeddoctor4273 Год назад

My wife called her Sling John. So I think I got you beat lol.

@Silly46337 Год назад

Who’s on first? Reference. Wow! Brilliant

@papagrounds Год назад

"We won one, Juan!"

@Deucehoru 6 месяцев назад

I'm lovin' it

@sorrowsorrow6759 2 года назад

My mother does this constantly 🤣🤘💯🍻

@KeithaBird 8 месяцев назад

I😂😂😂😂😂i...I just fucking lovvvvvve this guy. I about fell off my couch laughing❤Thank you Pete Holmes❤️

@tyler1234321 4 года назад

I was just at an improv show with my fam and my girlfriend's dad though Ann Frank was Hellen Keller and it literally killed me. I'm a ghost now.

@matthewlennhardt8408 3 года назад

Good, stay dead

@dannydemonic4799 2 года назад

I like to do that to people and mix them up. Sometimes they don’t catch it. Usually they’ do lol

@Brandon-mp5kk 2 года назад

Man this guy is hilarious, he should be way more known.

@princessaur 2 года назад

I've been saying this since 2014 I'm still waiting for it to happen. 😭

@oliviaday5932 3 года назад

PETE HOLMES IS SO SLEPT ON IM CACKLING

@xw7239 3 года назад

My friend lent me a copy of his book "Comedy Sex God" , and it was pretty good :) I hadn't watched much of his stand up prior to reading the book.

@mondlingubane5963 3 года назад

We finally 1-1-1.

@yourfriendlukejackson Год назад

A guy noticing his French friend’s new grooming habits in the locker room: Pierre, your berry area is bare. It’s your bare berry area, Pierre!

@blissmastaeasy1 2 года назад

Pete deserves to hear my snorting laughter right now

@aaronjohnson4604 Год назад

Lol that’s awesome.

@michellesequin7215 Год назад

VIOLATED 😂😂😂

@Zoro-IX 2 года назад

As an Asian kid that grew up in the east in 3 different countries, I recall my favorite record artist “Sha neea Tai wan“ 😂 If you can guess who that is, you’re a very cultured gentleman/woman

@Zoro-IX 2 года назад

@@jonnifjader Shania Twain 😂

@zemasterze11 Год назад

Man this video is McDonalds I’m lovin it

@stevenbell4066 6 месяцев назад

We won one Juan 😂

@Stephanlabize Год назад

This is incredible

@watsonator1885 2 года назад

I so love him

@TrollHunterxXx 2 года назад

Guys incredible

@buckunderbrush 2 года назад

I hate tacos said no Juan ever.

@Ksix1 2 года назад

This guy came down from the peaks of Mount Caucus and blessed us with some super corny and hilarious comedy 🤣

@lundylow 9 месяцев назад

It's a real bummer The Pete Holmes Show didn't last. I loved that his monologues weren't "the latest news," it was just miniature stand-up bits and Pete giggling at himself.

@justindahlstrom6677 7 месяцев назад

That’s how I keep saying it! And I am a mom!

@user-yq3rk1mo5m Год назад

I'm laughing out loud by myself. :-D

@alexcianricketts3365 2 года назад

Cutest thing when you laugh at your own jokes🤗😅😅😅

@josevalentin890 Год назад

Anybody who is a casual fan of Pete Holmes, you got to see his HBO series "Crashing" It's 4 seasons of fun and although it's not running anymore it is a great binge-watch. You'll be rooting for the poor bastard.

@gasgano8255 3 года назад

The Juan joke is very familiar as someone who knows who Juan-Pablo Montoya is :)

@kimiraikkonen3726 2 года назад

Then he left 😂 “I can’t play golf I’m in a presser!”

@paullegge6362 2 года назад

I’m using the McDonalds joke! 😂

@shaynemangan245 3 года назад

Just discovered 'Crashing' series. Blown.

@caesarsalad77 10 месяцев назад

Salon Dijon would be a fantastic drag name.

@heythatsnotmywalrus2819 2 года назад

Lube up the dial. Lmfao!

@SrraBrra Год назад

i have a line similar to the mcdonald’s joke but instead during dramatic moments i say “this is camping” and after the pause i say “in tents.”

@alex45041 4 года назад

Hilarious.

@valiantham6072 3 года назад

All I see is Badman... I Love it

@jasperharmon7279 2 года назад

3:04 you’re welcome

@samuelwiley1264 2 года назад

I found this from the dude who did the drum beat with it and I’m not disappointed

@glyph68 Год назад

Pete Holmes bump. On the list of our best. (Won one, Juan." = "I edited it!" -> Genius.)

@tevelchavez2098 3 года назад

"Won one Juan"

@peteedberg4217 7 месяцев назад

Pete Holmes is the Carl Sagan of comedy.

@Dianaandtheroses 29 дней назад

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Best.comment.ever.

@Dianaandtheroses 29 дней назад

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

@amandaphillips4344 4 года назад

Hes funny😂

@Hi-ov5nj Год назад

5:21 - Dane Cookesque

@IchiKudo 3 месяца назад

There's no way in hell Pete Holmes is the Batman 😅😅😅

@tracym3561 2 года назад

He reminds me of John Ritter - that's a good thing.

@illegalsmilez 2 года назад

I've got three words for you friend . . . Dusty Fucking Slay. He's always having a good time, and he likes to tell people about it lol.

@DpresheN Год назад

This dude is so funny!

@JoeByTheOunce 4 года назад

John Heder + TJ Miller = Pete Holmes

@kedabro1957 4 года назад

People who mispronounce words that badly scare me. Because they do the same thing to people and events. Instead of paying attention to what's really there, they just gloss over the details and dredge up something from their memory that resembles what's there. They'll assume you are just like a person from their past or from a tv show, instead of seeing what you really did or really said.

@tumultuousforce6204 3 года назад

yea

@nik4456 2 года назад

This is so incredibly accurate it's scary.

@kedabro1957 2 года назад

And guess what. This just happened to me again this week. From someone I thought was so smart and so nice I thought I could let my guard down. JFC will I ever meet an actual human being instead of these advanced simians that keep tricking me into caring about them? I don't want to see other people as dangerous cattle, but when they keep behaving like them what choice do I have?

@nik4456 2 года назад

@@kedabro1957 I totally believe it. I've had people misremember things to the point where it's not even worth correcting them. People have attributed bad things AND very rarely, but once in a while, good things to me that I've literally never done. It's like, they remember the vague setting of something that happened, but forget all the important details and so fill in the blanks with random guesses from their mind.

@idontwantahandlethough 2 года назад

That's straight up nonsense dude. Those are literally different skillsets. I mean somebody might happen to be bad at both but one doesnt imply the other all that much. Anecdotally, I know a lot of really smart people who know a ton of words but mispronounce them because they've only ever seen it in text, never spoken. Although I guess I dont know if smart people tend to have better memories. I assume so.