They Despise you because You DID This  

Love your reading stories ❤💕

Thank you

Love your honesty

Yes

They hate anybody that is better than them which is everybody...LOL

They more than want it. They set it up and try to make it happen. If your not paying attention they will do it to you.

Thanku x

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 or that's their mask

What if it’s the husband , is it possible they can do the same?

@@irinasvidunovich6264 Ohhh I feel such as in my case they want the attention not the wife!! I lost weight and people complimented me and later my hubby says " Why did they not notice I was 10 pounds thinner why do you get all the attention??". My Father left me a money gift to go to me only yet my hubby yelled and screamed at me cause he didn't get any money!! He kept telling I want a new computer and a big screen TV with your money!! I told him I wasn't going to spend it but I did to shut him up. Just a sample of issues

1000% Correct Aren't they Great. We Live in the Light. They live in the Dark. There LOSS.

💯💥💫 yes they are evil & sadistic and cruel. There always the good guy or hero. Never the bad guy..

I knew my N-Ex was evil after forming a seemingly close relationship with my father who has dementia and after we (thankfully) ended he told me, “I would never want to see your father unless I was invited to his funeral”. That killed me inside. I was so shocked at how EVIL someone could be. Like why be so cruel?! His own father suffered the same fate as mine is right now. It’s so insidious.

Yeah that Sounds just like The Toxic Narcissist.

Yup. Sadists

I know! They're horrible creatures

They are mentally ill people. Don't even try to understand them bro.

Kinda like living, breathing Terminators... they won't stop until they've erased the very thing they only wish they could be... sad huh? Put aside all the politics and b.s, but think about Trump (an unapologetic epitome of Narcissism) and his complete and utter disdain for Obama? As soon as he hit office, he did all within his power to erase Obama (from the hearts and minds of the people) not just himself, and that's the important part, to erase you in the eyes of others...

Horrifying.

@glittergirl3052 So do I

Better than being with of them though. What a blessing to keep your dista ce and be the good person you are.

Me too!

Better to have a decent life alone than be continually upset with a narcissistic partner.

It's sad!

Or they'll say, " you drove me into her arms!"

@@neicyluv553 Isn't it sadistic how they ALWAYS place the blame on someone else and NEVER themselves?

@@nowthriving classic gaslighting techniques. They are the scum of the earth!!

Demonic to the T!!!!!

Poor needy little crybabys

Jenny Caragia,You look cute 🥰,Hope you are not with a narcissist…

I was married for 38 yrs until his death. After we married he looked at me like hate me and how did I get mixed up with her. You are so right. He can push you to showing out and that's what he wants. The first time I listened to a narc podcast I started crying l was listening to my life s story. They don't care like talking to a wall I once cried like a baby and it did not touch him at all always indifferent to me. He worked me like I was his servant

​@@conniesmith3177l

Soo true😢

Well said and so true! 😢

1000% Correct.

Melanie, I Love The Way You Think.

Yes but please say how!

Absolute…. Level Up and Do better!

When a hawk or eagle is attacked by crows, the hawk or eagle flies higher and higher until it exhausts the crows who eventually give up or fall to their deaths.

They love you to death3

You are/you're*.

100

@@firemelon7296 relax

Thank u

💯

bingo!!💯💯🎯

Exactly.

You are, indeed, a "Thing" to the narcissist, who uses and then discards you. Such a relationship is, never about Respect. They believe they "own" you, because you are nothing more,to them, than a mere object, a possession, to be used. Release is what ~You, do, the narcissist is ,only, about enslavement, abuse and ultimate destruction. Therefore, you release yourself from the dark dungeon of the narcissist's lair. You, alone, Set, Yourself, Free....

Relax, relate, release!! Lol!: Released from their sadistic clutches for good!!

Beautiful comment👍👍👍

Hooray 🎉

Thank you so much, Beatriz, that is a wonderful idea!

My cousin, Donald. These people are monsters.

@sunnymagnuson1809 In what way

Yes, you have something they will never have

Years ago when I was slim and size 12 a big fat ugly nasty horrible woman was so jealous she even accused me of chasing her husband I laughed in her face nobody would want him he was such a weak kneed worm 😂😂😂😂😂

Very true. They are manipulators and liars and most, if not all of us, have values like morals, honesty, transparency, compassion and abide by them. We are also “light” for them because they live in a very pessimistic world.

Both my mother & now my sister have unleashed this other worldly vehemence on me. It's so over the top.

@@debbievoss3496 Don't let the bitches grind you down.

@lisahalajian4544

😢

I am so glad you have been able to live a good life without letting the narcs jerk you around. 👏👏👏👏👏

How do you do it when you have small children with them?

Yes, you can do it, you got this. Do not let that limitation he put in your mind bring you down. I BELIEVE in you, remember narcs want you to believe you cannot do anything without them.

@@nataliedulaney8347 you plan your exist carefully. I grew up in a Narc how and wish my mum had left the Narc men she married but she choose to prioritise them over her kids. It was dysfunction and..not positive. Now I’m older and I understand everything, I loose a lot of respect for my mother due to this choice. She is now in her 50thies and still remains a doormat to the Narc. She’s let herself go, she doesn’t look good for her age due to all the stress, misery and pain Narc put her through. Your kids are watching abs they’ll thank you for leaving.💕xxx

You can do this, I did After 35 years and I have 2 teenagers. You were only there to meet there needs and fill them up. They never loved you the way you loved them. They were only paying along with you. Everything you did for them as a loving wife, was only to fill them up. Shame on them for leading us on for all these years. NOW WISE UP WOMEN........ TAKE BACK YOUR LIFE AND LIVE FOR YOU AND YOU ALONE. GIVE ALL THE LOVE AND CARE TO YOURSELF. DO NICE THINGS FOR YOURSELF. MOVE ON WITH DIGNITY AND GRACE. LET THESE MONSTERS TO THEMSELVES. THEY WILL ALWAYS BE FULL OF ANGER AND MISSABLE. YOU ARE WORTH ALOT MORE THAN WHAT THESE MONSTERS HAD FOR YOU. RISE UP FROM THEM. BE THE BEST FOR YOURSELF. YOU ARE MORE THAN ENOUGH FOR LIFE. Go on and live the best years of your life.

They won't dry to themselves because they found another supply

🙏🏽💜

Omg girl. My narc is like that to me. I just found out I have cancer a few months ago, and the decline of our relationship has sped up exponentially. Due to my diagnosis, I started standing up for myself a lot more. Idgaf. I also suspect something else is happening to. Anyways I hope you’re doing well now. I have surgery tomorrow! I’m just concentrating on healing, and separating myself from the beliefs he has about me.

@@nollie9311 Thank you and best of luck to you and your healing. I went through chemo and now am having surgery this month so we will be healing together in a sense. Life is way to short to let the A holes make us miserable. Hugs!

@@skyeblu817 I'm doing ok. I have surgery coming up and then hopefully remission if God grants me it. Thanks for asking. So many people are dealing with cancer and other health issues and I wish them the best. The one thing I learned is how important mental health is and how it can hurt us physically as well. I hope you are having a great day!

@@beautifully_averagepanda4427 I hope you are doing well! I’m a few days post surgery. I realized it was only exactly 1 month from my diagnosis to the date of my surgery. What a hellish month it’s been.

He's sick that's it period.

Me too, 40 yrs... it's tough but I am trying to see the light at the end of this tunnel. I believe it's there.

40 years? God bless your soul

I realized this after 40 years as well.

@@Just1Sauce took me 50 years.

33 years....I think we have served our sentences.....Love to you all 💕

Evil.

bingo!💯🎯

Good for you! X

God bless 😍☺🙏

Indeed they are evil. The Bible says, if you are persecuted in one town, shake the dust off your feet there and move to another. Leave the demonic bastard and don't be his slave.

@@mindfulpeace8060 I’m so sorry I’ve only just found these comments a month later 🙄. And to answer your question yes I did do research on the internet and yes you must have a plan .it took me roughly a year to make my mind up and go .I didn’t want to I loved him 🙄. I’m in Australia I rang this number that call themselves respect .I told the lady what had happened.I told her I have no friends and no family I had absolutely no one and not one cent .he controlled the money .she told me first to go to my local police station and get a avo out on him .just incase .and from there they should be able to help me .which they did .yes do you know he sat on the lounge and watch me pack my car .I left with just my clothes and I left .he didn’t try to stop me .he was seeing some girl he works with .so I guess he didn’t care 🤷‍♀️he’s weird 😉. So the police took me to the hospital I was pretty upset and scared . Than they took me to our community centre and the girls helped me so much .they put me in a share house for 3 months .I didn’t care I was just grateful that I wasn’t going to be living out of my car .after that 3 months I got my own house .where I am today . But I do live n the country and it’s different to living over on the coast .if I lived on the coast it would of taken 10 years to get a place . But hear no where near the wait .there’s not as many people . I don’t mind I’m a lot safer living by myself hear than I would be on the coast . So make sure you have a plan .the worst part and the hardest part is putting your foot out the front door .it’s scary .stupid really now I look back .no one will hurt you people will only help you if you ask .explain your situation and they are more than happy to help . I’m lonely but I guess it’s better than being abused or ignored.I don’t cry nearly as much . Sometimes I still do because I can’t get over what he’s done .but I will it’s just time .please don’t waste another minute get out . You will be a,right .take one step at a time .yes it’s really scary but it’s better than living a life of lies .I promise you will be alright in time . Please let me know what you decide to do if you have left and if you are alright ? Remember one step at a time it will be alright .And from the bottom of my heart I truly wish you all the very best and you go girl . 💪☺️💞💞.

Sounds so similar to me, but I’m almost 30 yrs in. I left 13 months ago. Not divorced yet. He was mentally, emotionally and physically abusive. I told him for a year that I was leaving. Now he says he never thought I’d do it.

🙏🏽💜

❤❤❤

Narcissists are clearly mentally ill people. I know someone who now put me in the "discard phase(like I care). He literally told me: "The person who cares least in the relationship has all the power" Lol I immediately lost all respect and I was thinking.. "if that's how you feel, well 2 can play at that game" I still think to myself "wtf did I see in this person" lmao 🙄😂

Long time to learn, these narcissistic people are good at lies

It’s hard to do Robert. When you come across someone that fills all your fantasies about what would be ideal, you’re going to go for it. Pretty soon you’re in too deep and getting out is far harder than staying in. At least in the short term. For me, it just became a cumulation of all the BS, and the straw that broke the camels back. My family, (outside of it), where saying to me WTF?

@@prant8998 very true. I was love bombed and idolized in the beginning and thought i had found my dream come true. Actually turned into a huge nightmare. Yes, best to not get involved, but unfortunately you don't know who your dealing with and before you know it your deep into a mess and getting trauma bonded which keeps you in this mess.

Exactly. Literally a crappy relationshit

That's it literal Taurus Bull shit...

@@dianezielinski462 funnily enough my narcissist ex is a Taurus lol

You are spot on. That was one of her lines when I gave her my side of the story" It's not about you!" haha thank you

I have recorded some awful stuff.

@@nataliegreenham Yes, Natalie, a recording is a good way to remind yourself of what is going on. We tend to be too forgiving and actually have, "abuse amnesia,” where we minimize or forget the bad times when the abuser is nice to us. We want those good times so much, they dominate our thinking.

bingo!!💯🎯

Why did you not leave instead of making him change who you were and entering the darkness. A question not a judgement. Hope your okay.💕x

@@user-of9bx1uk3u agreed.

I’m doing the same to my husband he has verbally abused me for years. I didn’t know who I was for a long time. Depressed unhappy. So now I’m currently treating him how he treats me and I stay happy all day singing and laughing all day with my baby. He is doing the silent treatment and I’m so used to it now I just think it’s sad that he thinks this is mature. An petty argument about him not sleeping in the same room with me after 2 years I complained more about it and now a silent treatment. I have so much up my sleeve he will come home one day and I will be gone. The process has already started he just don’t know.

Going through something similar..fully understand...it hurts so much and takes a lot to be strong...videos such as these enlightens and provides with much needed answers

Toxic & dangerous !!

🙌🏽

Bottom line they crazy! 🤣 I found out the hard way.

👏🏽👏🏽

Yup damaging & dangerous

God bless you, KC. It hurts like hell right now, but you will feel so much better when you realize you are free from that jerk and no longer have to put up with his sour moods and bad attitude and threats. You will be free. Don't give up. Keep going!

Focus on you and healing.💕x

Oh KC, the stories you and I could trade. You describe my own break up literally word for word only it was myself that was told to leave and within a week started receiving a daily bombardment of divorce requests, texts, calls, emails. I begged her to let me at least catch my breath that our marriage was suddenly over and was still trying to comprehend not kissing my daughters good night before the new guy was sleeping IN my house within 6 weeks. They’re married now, she married him on our own anniversary the following year and had my 3 beautiful little girls as their bridesmaids. She still texts me daily, constant criticism… it’s now been 4 years and still she doesn’t leave me alone despite having a new husband and a baby plus a the huge house she always wanted. I’m far happier in myself, free and away from her, but it’s the constant barrage of abuse and put downs that still wear me down. Stephanie’s video this week couldn’t have come through at a more appropriate time 😞

@@phoenixrising5205 I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It’s awful. People who have never been with a narcissist how no idea how cruel they can really be, especially when kids are involved. Hoping you continue to find peace daily.

they make stuff up and lie, talk to a lawyer, your ex has no control, do not under any circumstance believe anyghinf he says!!! keep re cord if every single thing he says and does with datesand times.... my ex did the same ploys of control, they want to scare you into doing what thry want, their way. HE HAS NO POWER, NO CONTROL, but you must keep a detailed log, get professional advice,

Don’t blame yourself. Recognizing it and accepting it is part of the healing journey. So many different types of narcissists…some are very deceiving and it takes a while to see it all. Just stay no contact and you will recover. ❤

The feeling is mutual. The more I learn about the narcs the more upset I am with myself that I couldn’t get a read on this early in my relationship that is now my marriage. But, after thinking that I was the problem, I now feel a bit relieved that I am actually normal. Moving forward I am not going to be myself up anymore.

Don't blame yourself for anything, believe me there are plenty of people who will blame you for everything.....it's their MO......especially if you are the eagle and they are the crow.....

The sister sounds like she’s also, a Narc.

Or a flying monkey

That’s no way to live life with a significant other. Why are you still with him. If your not happy leave. X

That is a fake Christian. Matthew 7:21-23 21 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. 22 Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? 23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil. 1 Corinthians 13:1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.

Hey! Love yourself and get rid of him.. watch Stephanie's video about Trauma bond.. it'll help you alot hopefully ❤ stay strong and please get rid of anyone who is destroying you

Same

Evil spirit

Time to cutt it off

Absolutely! I'm dealing with four of five siblings right now. Myself being the youngest and my brother the second youngest are not this way. My brother is really good at minding his own business. I got sucked in by my sisters especially and the oldest brother wanting me to leave my current husband. The problem is my husband is a very good judge of character and has made me aware of my siblings toxic ways. He always says "people don't change, accepting this is step one and do not react is step two. I have become angry many times because I'm not thin enough, I'm behaving poorly because I'm having fun and enjoying myself 😮 I could go on and on. Everything came to a head recently with two sisters. One is an enabler/flying monkey/minion for the other narcissistic sister. She brought up a family issue from 22 years ago (borrowed money from our Dad) who was also a narcissist (but was easier on the two youngest children). My mother thankfully was very nurturing and dud her best to protect the younger children from our father's wrath. I digress. My enabling sister said to me that the narcissistic sister didn't trust me because I didn't pay our father back. I did pay some of the money back (which was not a significant amount) and she accused me of stealing their inheritance. I became angry and hurt and told the enabling sister that she wasn't perfect either and hung up. That was over a month ago. I have blocked them because I need therapy and have received it before and will continue down this path. Stephanie Lyn is amazing and calming. Thank you for these videos.

My brother died a year ago, after 30+ years with a toxic/narc lady. He felt sorry for her in that she said she was abused growing up. (She claimed). He just could not see her toxicity ever. A large family, we accepted her but she managed to insult all of us, while taking $$ and benefits while ignoring her own family. Eventually he would be a target, and he was while in failing health, disabled, she told him she was leaving him. His health depended upon in part getting away from her or else. At least he was your former spouse, my brother was like brainwashed and needed de-briefing, that's how badly he could not see her anti-social personality. When he was ill in the ICU, she never called us, when he died she waited one whole week to call. We talked, she cried, so I felt sorry of course but she even lashed out on me when he died, she was angry as though it was our fault. Now one year out, she won't answer the phone, I can't reach her and we the family need to collect items of our estate, plus other info we need from her. I don't know what I can do. Awful.

@jane braun Go back to the Court. They will help you. Or ask your Attorney. About what can legally be done in your State. A friendly reminder always write specific things in a Will. And always have a Will. Regardless of your assets. To avoid these types of problems.

I had to look up the meaning of mortification...........it was quite eye opening. Then I reread your comments and much more deeply understood your choice of that word.

That’s great news! 🙌🏽 I pray the Narcs at my job leave too.. 🙏🏽xx

Agree. My ex narc husband (been divorced 14 years) still hates me in many ways. He left the marriage.

I wonder if that's why it's so hard to break away - because as I grow stronger they weaken, and it feels like it's me hurting them. If it's me or them I have to choose me, but I want to rise above duality. So then I return to love, to thinking I can love them into wellness. But that doesn't seem to work either so on I go...

That’s insane 😮

I have noticed a theme of narcs dumping their spouses when the spouse gets seriously ill. That is unbelievably cruel behavior, and I am sorry you experienced that. I wonder if they do it because if all the attention is on you battling your illness that they won't get the supply they need. Also their selfishness and cowardice comes out. Better for them to cut and run before you actually need them for anything. My husband was like that. Things got too hard, he wouldn't help me so we could actually get through the tough times, and he ran the fuck away. I wish you healing and peace. God bless.

YES. Got it bad from family, then from a partner. Got sick of taking it and started give back for once.

Sorry to hear this friend