TOXIC FAMILY CONTROL: 12 WAYS OCPD TAKES CONTROL AND DOMINATES LIVES

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Controlling people (or toxic family controllers) are difficult to manage.
Most people believe that controllers are evil, dominating people who want to harm others.
But the reality is that controlling people could be the product of a very toxic family dynamic where they have received years upon years of reinforcement.
Difficulty accepting that not everything will always go their way is often at the core of controlling people.
But research also suggests that controllers may be the product of a personality disorder that developed through years of reinforcement, lack of boundaries, and privilage.
A combination of environmental and biological factors collide to create the individual with obsessive-compulsive personality disorder.
In this live chat, I discuss controlling people with obsessive-compulsive personality disorder.
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#trauma #tamarahilllpc #TOXICFAMILY
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DISCUSSED IN THIS CHAT:
0:00 intro
2:25 OCD vs Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD)
5:22 Obsessive-compulsive disorder (Obsession vs Compulsion)
8:32 narcissism can be connected to obsessive-compulsive personality disorder
16:40 WHAT DOES THIS LOOK LIKE IN DAILY LIFE
34:04 desired control over EVERY little thing
38:33 WHAT CONTROLLERS ARE LIKE
44:12 HOW TO MANAGE THESE PEOPLE
*discussion in-between content
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Mentioned In The Video:
1. The psychology of offense www.sagu.edu/thoughthub/the-p...
2. Born to Choose: The Origins and Value of the Need for Control
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
3. It’s All About Control
www.psychologicalscience.org/...
4. Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NB...
5. Interpersonal Functioning in Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
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*New videos Wednesday, Friday and/or Sunday, EST.
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Music:
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🎵 Track Info:
Epidemic Sound
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DISCLAIMER:
*Videos are provided for exploration and educational purposes only and does not constitute clinical suggestions or consultation for individual cases.
If you or someone you know is having a medical emergency involving harm to self, please reach out to the suicide prevention hotline suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.
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----Contact me-------(BUSINESS INQUIRIES ONLY)
I'm Támara, a licensed and internationally/Board certified trauma mental health therapist, with over 14 years experience. I specialize in helping children, teens, and families with mental illness. I also treat psychological/emotional trauma in children, teens, and adults.
If you'd like to contact me or inquire about my international consultations, you may email me at contact@anchoredinknowledge.com. *Please note: all consultations are charged a fixed rate fee based on the case content.
Mail me stuff!
PO BOX 15747
Robinson Township, PA 15244
*FOLLOW ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
Twitter - / therapisttee
Website - www.anchoredinknowledge.com
Instagram: thilltherap...
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Опубликовано:

31 июл 2024

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Комментарии : 30

@TherapistTamaraHill 2 месяца назад

RU-vid will make the VERY lively chatbox available to you in 12 hrs of this live chat ending. 😀 The best part!

@truth4utoda 2 месяца назад

My husband's family is this exact way. You can't speak, breathe, rest, etc. with these people.

@TherapistTamaraHill 2 месяца назад

I hate to say it but, yes, this is often their MO - modus operandi.

@justice8563 2 месяца назад

I’m finally realizing how disturbed my family is. I came across a video about scapegoat family cult’s and believe that is what has happened to me and why I have always been treated as an indentured servant to my family. I have been treated as a outed member of the family since I returned to my home town 12 years ago. How dare I leave and come back and refuse their demands and control. It depresses me that every single one of my family members are toxic, controlling, vindictive, abusive and so much more. The things I have mentioned on your channel is just a snippet of what I’ve been put through, and it’s not only sad, but also disgusting and embarrassing because I allowed it for so long. Your channel has helped me put the last few pieces of the puzzle together. I can’t seem to find a support group or a therapists that understands narcissism in my area. I’m not on Facebook nor any other social media except RU-vid, so it’s be difficult to find help. The therapists in my area seem’s to be more about couple therapy and not about Narcissism or Trauma. I cherish your followers in your chat. They come across so sweet and it feels safe when we all have so much in common with each other. I know that Deb wants to start a support group and I would love to be allowed to join when she does. It’s validating to know that what I have been put through and accused of has been nothing but them deflecting their toxicity, shame and hate on to me. Stepping back and really seeing and hearing the truth has been an eye opening experience, and I credit that to you, so Thank you Tamara.

@JoshuaAnzalone-zk5ht 2 месяца назад

My family tried to make me their scapegoat. They cant stand me because ive called out their toxicity and dysfunction since I was 15 years old. The last time I saw them was at my mothers funeral a couple years ago and when I got back home I decided I will never speak to them everrrr again.

@JoshuaAnzalone-zk5ht 2 месяца назад

Im a truth speaker and my family tried to make me their scapegoat but i refused it. Now they can argue with each other because im not the regulator or punching bag for demons emotions.

@deeelle697 2 месяца назад

You have no idea how helpful your videos are. Thank you so much for realistically & scientifically breaking things down.

@TherapistTamaraHill 2 месяца назад

🤗You're welcome! So glad this is helpful to you.

@doriannemosich232 26 дней назад

Dr T so happy to of Found you, you are saving my fragile sanity, you are so gifted to help us heal from the stupid terrible cluelessness of the terrible ppl who do the devil's work and enjoy it. You will be famous because so many good ppl need to dodge heal & bounce back.

@TherapistTamaraHill 26 дней назад

That's so kind of you.❤Thank you! I feel blessed by God to have this channel and to share with all of you. That's a blessing indeed. And I'm happy that this is helping you too. An answered prayer!

@TheRetroWoman80 2 месяца назад

You consistently help me deal with and identify things in some of my loved ones. Thank you, Tamara. My significant other has OCD among other things. She is DEFINITELY a perfectionist but thankfully not OCPD. I am compassionate toward her as you suggested but it is still a challenge dealing with that rigidity day to day. To get through it, I just remain grateful and remember that hers is at a moderate level, as yours is.

@TherapistTamaraHill 2 месяца назад

You're weclome! And I'm so glad to hear that. There are some people, by the way, who can meet diagnostic criteria for both OCD and OCPD. That can be so very difficult for some families.

@TheRetroWoman80 2 месяца назад

@@TherapistTamaraHill I bet🫤

@truth4utoda 2 месяца назад

❤love this!! Thank you lovely

@TherapistTamaraHill 2 месяца назад

You're so welcome!🤗

@fifilafleur5555 2 месяца назад

My family cult…

@liagrigori 2 месяца назад

Yes , my dad

@slacks100 Месяц назад

The Other side of the equation is when the empath child dose not capitulate to the controlling parent and becomes the "Black Sheep". Then there is a price to be paid. the parent withholds or shows little to no interest in that sibling's well being. That is the worst " one is left to figure things out by ones self ?

@tonydays6673 12 дней назад

Blessings

@boogiegirl4276 Месяц назад

A lot of insecure men have OCPD, and it is relavant to domestic violence. 😢😢😢

@LovelyFlipFlops-jl9kl 2 месяца назад

Been dealing with other trying to control me for 40 years... nothing new.

@CherrysJubileeJoyfully 2 месяца назад

Aw I missed it You did great with the names your getting it! 11:51 that one is said like A-NEW-BUS 50:28 ok so not everyone called narcissistic has narcissistic personally disorder. It is like OCD vs. OCPD NARCISSIST is a is a word on its own Definition of narcissistic: Personality qualities include thinking very highly of oneself, needing admiration, believing others are inferior, and lacking empathy for others. NPD has its own A disorder in which a person has an inflated sense of self-importance. Narcissistic personality disorder is found more commonly in men. The cause is unknown but likely involves a combination of genetic and environmental factors. Symptoms include an excessive need for admiration, disregard for others' feelings, an inability to handle any criticism, and a sense of entitlement. The disorder needs to be diagnosed by a professional. Treatment involves talk therapy. 1 is an adverb the other has that quality as a symptom. But because people use both it gets confused. Most people don't mean npd. But the adverb came first and now we get attacked for useing it because it is assumed that we mean npd!!!! It is very hard om survivors to have this argument because it invalidates us It is not on the rise covid gave us time and independence to wake up from the nightmare that was our lives.

@MrDrudeezy 2 месяца назад

The pancake-girl, is her name Paula? Actually, this is my co-parent partner, and our kids have no chance at normalcy. I think the worst their behavior, the more she controls my influence as a father So far, her malevolence is winning the influence.

@JesusSaves77799 Месяц назад

Regarding the teenager who behaved in that way, I am wondering if she is possibly autistic? Sometimes autistic people can get confused with narcissistic people because the need to control the environment can be similar. If not, I wonder if she ever had a brain scan done to make sure nothing was wrong with her brain? Otherwise, it sounds like a case of poor parenting if they allowed her to get to be this bad by age 15?? I would suggest her being put in a group home or hospital while the parents can collect themselves and see if they can look at some different models of care for her. Either it’s something biological that maybe can be helped with even metabolic remedies or medicine, or it’s lax parenting and she needs some firm but loving discipline. I just hope that former clients won’t see these videos and maybe know the discussion is about them? Maybe it’s better to not say someone was a former client but just say you know of a case? Just some thoughts! 🙏🙏

@ecohumanism 2 месяца назад

it is certainly a good idea to clean your hands after touching handles in public places, But imo hand sanitizer is an overkill, it feels pungent and I am trying to not use it unless I can wash my hands afterwards, I would just use antibacterial wet wipes, and then put some cream on my hands and on the wheel. Still probably would not force anyone else to do what is comfortable to me

@Catherine-do5ok Месяц назад

Can you have both types of ocd the control and the ocpd

@jennifersim3262 Месяц назад

❤❤❤

@TherapistTamaraHill Месяц назад

🤗

@blklionz659 2 месяца назад

🫰🏿🫰🏿🫰🏿

@justice8563 2 месяца назад

I’m finally realizing how disturbed my family is. I came across a video about scapegoat family cult’s and believe that is what has happened to me and why I have always been treated as an indentured servant to my family. I have been treated as a outed member of the family since I returned to my home town 12 years ago. How dare I leave and come back and refuse their demands and control. It depresses me that every single one of my family members are toxic, controlling, vindictive, abusive and so much more. The things I have mentioned on your channel is just a snippet of what I’ve been put through, and it’s not only sad, but also disgusting and embarrassing because I allowed it for so long. Your channel has helped me put the last few pieces of the puzzle together. It’s been so hard finding a support group or a therapists that understands narcissism in my area. I’m not on Facebook nor any other social media except RU-vid, so it’s be difficult to find help. The therapists in my area seem’s to be more about interested in couple therapy and not about Narcissism or Trauma. I cherish your followers in your chat. They come across so sweet and it feels safe when we all have so much in common with each other. I know that Deb wants to start a support group and I would love to be allowed to join when she does. Just wanted to let you know how validating it is to know that what I have been put through and accused of, has been nothing but them deflecting their toxicity, shame and hate on to me. Stepping back and really seeing and hearing the truth has been an eye opening experience, and I credit that to you, so Thank you Tamara.