Up and down, run away?, addiction, recovery, create yourself, spread love, keep FAITH 

sweetie listen, it all comes down to this. in no way am i trying to be unkind, you ask for opinions so i will give it in the most loving way possible. At the very end of the day this is the only sure thing. once you are dead, you cannot become undead. once you are gone you cannot come back. nothing else matters if you're not here. there can be no excuses, no rationalizing. i pray for you daily but no one can help you if you don't help yourself. you already know that. i beg of you please stay, get the help.

You say you want to go home, but where would that home be? You’ve had such a hard time out in the world. You deserve so much more. And the only way to have access to that “more” is if you relinquish control, trust the process, and keep going. I know it’s so hard. Of course, I don’t know exactly what you’re going through, but I do know that you have it in you to keep going. You’ve made it this far, and this is what you’ve wanted (and needed!) for months. We’re here for you! Please hold tightly to your faith, as it may be the only thing you’ll have that will allow you to keep going. That and us, of course, but we’re not able to stay with you at all hours. But whenever you post, we’re here ❤ I’m holding out hope for you!

If you say 'everything screams' in you to go home, it's actually the illness that screams. Soon you'll start to single out the screams of illness and fight them out of your system. Then slowly you can hear your actual body asking for care and what's best, you can now calmly give that care and start feeling better day by day.

In the TED talk "Lessons from a mental hospital" it was said that "Sitting with the discomfort and the pain of being a human being is the only way to become a real human being" and I think that may apply in your situation. Your inner voice is screaming at you to run away, but you know that staying there and going through all the discomfort and pain is the only way you will be saved. I believe in you and I always will. You are strong and what you're doing is extraordinarily hard. Keep your head up warrior 💪❤️❤️❤️

Keep fighting the urge to run back to your safe place where you can be alone with your addiction. I fight this fight every day myself and it’s hard. But you sound like your able to stop and reflect on the situation and find some peace. Honestly, I’m also not having a good day either. I had plans to get out of the house and be social with friends but I’ve pulled back and feel like just sleeping today. Your so lovely and deserve the best life. Just for today stay. Tomorrow is a new day, deal with tomorrow…tomorrow. Lots of love to you❤

I love the story you told of the husband and wife and your empathy toward them. Even in your darkest moments you’re able to care and show love to others and I think that’s so beautiful. I am like you. I hate any sound when I’m eating, so the music would have bothered me as well. I’m so proud of you and your courage! Day 3 already!! That’s a reason to celebrate 🎉🎉🎉 lots of love to you, my dear 💜

I was told once , no permanent actions for temporary problems..it has helped me through many a bad time.. I hope you get through this temporary situation , which leads to a more fulfilling future. 💜

You do as many videos as you need…we can tell that doing them really does help you. By the end, you are more uplifted, just by sharing, than you are at the start! I love you and am keeping you in my prayers ❤️ 🙏🏻. You are awesome!

One more day triumphing over your disordered impulses and pain- a thousand congratulations! Your inner strength is amazing. Thank you for sharing this journey with us!

I would love for you to grace my ears with a podcast one day! You are so eloquent and gracious with your words, in your vulnerability you radiant strength and I thank you so much for sharing your journey. I wish for you to recover and continue spreading your wisdom because the world needs you x (I scrambled around for the log in of my 10 year old RU-vid account just to leave this message 😅) so much love to you Lique!

I’m so proud of you for staying! You can do this Angelique! God loves you, He sees you and all your struggles, trust in Him!❤

I’m so proud of you for staying and continuing the treatment. Each day is a new day and at the end of this chapter you will be a better person. God has your back so focus on him when you are down. Will continue to pray for you that gives you the strength. Sending lots of love and prayers!

If you don’t stay you will not survive, so stay how difficult this is. See this as your last change to recover. I don’t try to be unkind but sometimes you need a kick under the ass. You will get there. Stay strong and stay positive.

Dearest Angelique, you are so much stronger than you think… please continue with a renewed sense of power over this situation. Sending you so much love and prayers to feel you are not alone in this. 💛🙏✨

You're right, our brains seek pleasure as a form of escapism. The fight or flight response is quite powerful, as is the pull of the dopamine/reward response. It's very good that you're self aware enough to detect in yourself the urge to flee and stopped yourself from following through. Being able to recognize that you're "spiralling" is critical to recovery. It may not make the struggle easier, but it's a tool that not everyone seems to have when they need it most. Sometimes we only gain this depth of internal insight after we've experienced intense struggle/hardship. Thank you for sharing this update and letting us know how things are going.

You’re such an inspiration for me. Before I watch your new video of course I had to watch this one. I can’t judge you because you are at this point stronger than me, please keep being that inspiration for me. This video made me cry. Pain is maybe hell on earth, but I want you to be here, selfish of me, but I want you alive, and better. Please, please, please ❤❤❤

Thank you for this update/upload. Hang on in there and keep working on creating who you want to be xxx💗

You can do it! I have complete faith in you! Many hills to climb I know but, once you’ve done it, everything will be so worth the pain and discomfort along the way xxxx❤

Recovery in part is letting your “eating disorder voice” occupy space in your mind but not your life. She may still speak to you and try to trauma bond with you, like an old friend… but continue to fight and live with the discomfort. You will become stronger everyday. ♥️

Stay in today, the now , one day at a time, sometimes, one single breath at a time, sweetheart! Please don’t let anything or any person stop this process, you have come such a long way❤️ I love how introspective you are, to stretch yourself to be more like you can be by God can only strengthen you. You are stronger than you think! I always wonder why it so difficult for some people to be kind, it doesn’t cost anything, it might just make the difference in Someone’s day🥰I do love you and your honesty!! Stay strong beautiful soul!!!😘😘😘

I have gone through this too so I truly know how extremely difficult and hard it is, but you do need to stay even though it's hard. Keep remembering it's the same as a heroin addiction, if you had a friend addicted to heroin that wanted to leave rehab to go home and do drugs would you think that's a good idea or would you want them to continue treatment until they fully get better? Even though it's difficult you know you need to do it, this is the time that you stick the treatment all the way through and get better. You know it that this time is different, this is when you recover. Rome wasn't built in a day, it'll take some time and it'll be hell getting there but you are truly strong enough to make it through to the other side! We're all rooting for you everyday. It really gets easier every week in recovery from my memory, the first week or 2 truly is the hardest and absolute worst thing in the world but after that it progressively gets easier and easier

It’s not you that wants to run, it’s the illness. The ego is trying to “protect” you with rationalizing. It looks for an excuses to get you in the situation you know, that you have control over, that feels comfortable to you, but unfortunately comfortable and known is that’s the illness in your case. Let go of control and try to go with the flow, slowly but surely ♥️

Hello, as I watch your videos, I am so amazed at your strength of will! You have such inner strength and the beautiful ability to articulate your feelings, your thoughts, and your struggles! I have found it so helpful to hear about what goes on in the mind and life of someone with a food disorder and this will help me in the future to refrain from judging or thinking I know something about an area I have no experience with. Thank you and bless you for hanging in there! We are all with you!

It's nice that you have all of these people doing everything for you. Have a great day!

What you talked about at the end, about the lady needing love, etc. This is 100% truth. We all need love, and sometimes the only thing that will distract us from our own misery is to try and lessen someone else's misery.

I'm so proud of you! I can only imagine how difficult this process is for you. Please stick with it and know we are all wishing you the best.

I think when people are saying you look better in your face, it's not to do with gaining weight, it's to do with the fact that you look stronger, you clearly have more energy, and your movements are more animated. You look as if you're returning from the brink. Please, please continue to stay there, they are helping you, even when it seems harsh. They have their reasons for everything that they do, don't take it as a personal thing, it is just their procedures to keep you safe and help you recover.

It's so sweet to see your training fighting through still, when you're literally fighting for your life in the hospital. I'd like to mention Maslow's hierarchy here as a reminder to be gentle with yourself. You're still fighting to get your basic needs met, hence the extra resistance to the music during your time of stress. It's really beautiful that you are fighting and afraid, and yet you still shine and do your best to help others in need. You still realize everyone else is doing the best they can and their emotions are always the cause of something they're going through. It's the curse of a true psychologist or psychological research honestly though isn't it? The superhuman ability to see and mend pain in others while being almost impervious to using it on themselves. It's clear you have a beautiful, warm soul. When you feel like sprinting away, I'd like to (gently) ask you to remember the state of mind you've been in each time you couldn't get a bed in a hospital and how desperate you were for it. I understand the desperation to run away, but that woman you were in your previous videos who was willing to do anything to get here would have her heart broken. It will be worth it and I know you know that. I hope you can find the strength to stay 💕 I have ~faith~ in you dear, stay strong for today and we'll see you at your next check in. Crossing my fingers that your blood checks will start coming less frequently.

That must be very uncomfortable, to say the least, that they wake you up at random hours to weigh you and on top of that strip you naked in the process :-(. Hopefully they are being kind/professional during the process to prevent extra anxiety/stress/trauma. A part of healing involves good sleep and feeling safe, so hopefully they allow you to get proper rest and provide you with a comfortable environment. Sending strength your way! ✨️ ❤️

You are important❤ You matter❤ So proud of you, but more importantly, I hope you’re so proud of yourself for getting help you so deserve 🥰

Sweetheart. You have helped me tremendously throughout the last few months. Your kindness and gentleness and purity of spirit has gotten me through some rough patches. You have been an inspiration to me. I’ve watched you be completely desperate to get a bed somewhere so your life can be saved. I’ve prayed so hard for you to get the help you wanted and deserve. You have it now. No, it’s not easy. It seems insurmountable I know. Like it could never get better. But it can, I promise you with everything I have. Please please fight through the doubt. I know you want to live. Countless others want you to live too. Please stay and get the help you wanted and were so desperate for. We love you.

I’m proud of you for having the courage to stay even when every fiber of your being is telling you to leave. Please know you have so much support. You can and you will get through this! ❤

Our minds are so powerful and will multiply thoughts of anxiety and fear if we allow it. Fortunately we can also quickly redirect ourselves to focus on the good and positive things. You get to choose what your mind focuses on. You are getting the care you were begging and praying for just a few days ago, you have great insight, you are seeing improvement in your hypoglycemia and no doubt that will continue. You are healing in ways you aren’t even aware of, focus on those things. You’ve got this!! Praying for you still ❤

Thank you, hun. Please keep talking to us and keep going, you've already taken that first step! You can speak to us at any time. Blessings! 😊🧡😊🎈

You got this

Don't worry we can hear you fine. Remember only you have the ability to change. I know this is difficult for you but you really, have to stop making excuses if you truly want to get better. Glad the hypos are improving x

No one said it would be easy. If it was then I’d be worried. BUT if you run away your eating disorder wins, it will kill you. There is so much out there for you, freedom is great and it is yours if you want it. You get one chance in life, don’t waste a moment of it. Live, experience everything and regret nothing. This is a tough time but it will make you stronger and you can face anything. You go girl, get your life back and fly xx

Something that helped me …. My therapist mentioned that I am discomfort phobic and that we can work on my becoming more … discomfort tolerant ….. that it’s unrealistic to be a human and expect to always be comfortable … he explained how that’s such an illogical way to think … For you in your case … your thought may be something along the lines of “ omg I’m in soooo much pain , it’s ridiculous , I can’t stand it , I need to go home so I can stop this insanity “ A rational reframing might be something like “ I’m in the refeeding process , naturally it’s quite painful given my eating disorder …. Even though I really don’t like feeling like this , it will pass and I can stand it” AMEN God will minute by minute help you with this …. Every thought irrational thought that tells you you should be in a constant state of love and comfort ..challenge it .. We are humans and humans experience all the emotions from pain to joy … you can’t be a human and not experiencing the full spectrum… so my sweet fellow human …. Carry on …. You are doing fantastic 🕺whoop whoop 🙌

It’s SOOO incredibly hard to do anything, especially when you’re an addict and you can’t do what you normally do, but you ARE DOING IT!!! You have been a total Rock Star and I have faith that you are going to stay and get hold of this beast once and for all. ❤❤❤💪💪💪🙏🙏🙏

Don't forget to meditate. Visioning is powerful. I'll send you light during my meditation tonight - from Australia all the way to u

I completely understand what you are going through, and how mentally and physically challenging that recovery is! But it IS ALWAYS worth it !!! God is with you, and watching you and taking care of you every step of the way! I am glad to hear that you have supportive Christians in your life! Keep praying and talking to God! He has a plan for your life! Never give up ~!!!

Lique when I was a little girl and having a very hard time adjusting to a new school, my mother told me to pray for courage and strength whenever I’m struggling in life. She also said when I’m feeling low to help someone else. I’ve always remembered those words and used her advice, and they’ve helped me every time. I pray you find peace every day.

Thank you for the update, as you’ve been in my thoughts and prayers today. I think that your comment section is the most beautiful and supportive that I’ve seen on YT. What a blessing! You are a beautiful soul, and an inspiration to me. Continued prayers, good energy, and love from Texas, US. 💝💐🙏🏻

Dear Lique, thank you for the frequent updates. Just keep doing what you're doing. I believe in your ability to remain steadfast in your recovery. I get excited just thinking about all the wonderful things ahead for you in the future as you get better and better.

All your emotions, feelings, thoughts, fears are valid! This is a very hard journey, but you are strong and you've already did so much!! Sending you more strength and love! 💕💕💕

You're doing great. You are looking better, i thought that straight away. You have all the answers and you know all the challenges you are facing. You've got a great attitude and positivity, so keep fighting the false instincts and urges and they WILL weaken. You are winning. You've got lots of people supporting you.

STAY you CAN do this! Everytime that voice tells you to leave tell it to fuck off and imagine yourself healthy. Riding a bike, swimming, shopping, being able to walk around and feel strong in your body, dating, working. A vision board really helped me. The pleasure from giving in to the disorder is nothing compared to the pleasure you could have in your life. This is the hardest thing you will ever do but you CAN do this

My dear Angelique, it is so amazing to see your beautiful face. A great reveal is taking place amidst this nightmare that you are enduring. You are changing my dear -much like a lovely butterfly. They say we never know how strong we are until it is the only option we have. It must be recognized that your strength is greater than your addiction right now and that is why you are still there. Your strength comes directly from your constant faith. You have gotten me really thinking about what you said about the clinic not having therapists available. This seems counterproductive. One thing to consider is online therapists. What really stood out to me in this video is your revelation about reacting with love. This is the reason we are all here-to love one another. I was so touched to hear you explain that you are learning life lessons in all of this. I understand that it may be very overwhelming to be facing all of the emotions that you are experiencing now. What I can tell you is that it will all pass. Each day will get better. I wish i could tell the world this because sometimes we can find ourselves in the deepest depths of despair and not everyone knows that it will pass. And It will. I promise you this. God loves you my dear and I am continuing to pray for you each and every day. Remember that nothing that was ever worth it was easy. You deserve this. Hugs n love as always...

You are stronger than you realize. The fact that you've stayed in the hospital even though your mind is screaming to leave proves this. I admire you for that. I can't begin to even imagine the battle you're fighting. Please continue to keep strong in your faith and cling to God in your darkest moments. He loves and cares for you and so do we. ❤❤❤🙏🙏❤❤❤

Lique, you are such an inspiration to me. I loved that quote “life is not about finding yourself, but creating yourself”. It’s clear you know that leaving is running towards death, and staying is struggling towards life, but I understand that its so very hard to go through those emotions, urges and instincts. Being so tired can’t be helping … is it possible for you nap during the day? Could you perhaps read to distract yourself? Wishing you all the very best ❤

It's soo good to hear you're keeping your hope alive and your best friends are coming to see you. I hope you can draw some hope and encouragement from them. I really struggle with sound also. It's very difficult. Loud music, loud noise etc, but thankfully I'm not as bad with this as I used to be. I love your quote for the day. I know exactly how hard this is but also that you can do it! I have complete faith in you, Angelique. xoxox

You're very self aware about what is happening internally in your mind. That is a good tool. You know that your whole being will protest this change. You can remind yourself that this feeling is always the worst at first, and that it gets better later in the process. I've been moved by your videos. I genuinely wish you every success and happiness in the future. You're a person who deserves it. Much love.

Hello Angelique, I'm so glad to see your new video and so happy you are still fighting the good fight! God has begun a great work in you. In spite of your own pain and suffering, you were able to reach out with kindness to that other patient and his wife. That is the Holy Spirit working through you. I'm so proud of you! I'm also so happy to know you are accepting the medical help and treatment you need to heal your body and become the strong and powerful woman you are meant to be. There are great things in your future. Sometimes God uses your most painful experiences in a way that helps you to minister to others going through similar trials and difficulties. Although I've never experienced the refeeding process, I've been researching it and everyone agrees it's no fun at all, and can be medically dangerous. So the fact that they are checking on your eight times a day really speaks to the level of diligence and professionalism of your medical staff. They are keeping you safe. I give thanks to God for them. I know the refeeding process is not easy, but as they say, "Tough times don't last, but tough people do." Please keep posting. We all love and care about you. 😊🙏

The easy thing to do is to give up and live out what time you have left 😪, The hardest thing is to fight to go against the eating disorder voices, battle on,fight for your life....NO ONE can choose the road you choose except you, Always here to support you ❤

Who else wants to just give this angel a BIG hug?

Crying listening to this. You are brilliant. You obviously still have your mind, b/c you speak so eloquently. I Promise you. ive been there ... Life can be Good. Pls, pls, Trust. Be, angry and whatever other emotion, but, you deserve life. You deserve to be here.

You have looked better for over a week. Keep doing this… It’s your best option. Remember you really don’t have a place to live right? Protest but find something to fill up your day . Do you read? Keep a journal, something. Be thankful…

I really love your voice, is so calming.. LIQUE, take it easy, you can do this, don't give up, you're a strong and resilient woman so step by step you will make it!

You are so incredibly reflected. I admire your determination and I am convinced you can make it to recovery if you keep being strong and fight that battle day by day. I wish you best of luck and health!

Brave, kind and wonderful Lique - sending you love and hugs from England ❤So glad that the medical staff said you are doing well- thats really encouraging. Be proud of yourself because we are proud of you.

I am so proud of you for fighting the good fight. And congratulations on doing so well so far! It was so good to hear that the nurses told you you are doing so well. Keep it up it will get easier.

You're such a sweet caring person. I know it's hard , but you are a fighter. Please get the help you need , and stay strong . The road may seem hard, but you have to keep going. Praying and sending love to you. You can do it !!

Through my own personal experiences, I know that holding on to anger, bitterness and resentment made me sick. I came across Joyce Meyer on you tube and she taught me how to let go of it all. Now I feel at peace. Please don't see your recovery as hell, that is just the demons trying to take control. Just relax, be peaceful and don't fight the treatment. The doctors and nurses are not your enemy, they are trying to save your life. Appreciate them and feel blessed for having this chance to start a fresh new chapter in life. It will be worth it once you get your energy back..sending love ❤️

You are strong and amazing!! Keep up the hard work you got this !! You are not alone others are going through this with you and you are an inspiration ❤

You are so smart, strong and brave! It’s so hard to sit in your misery! We all know that. Most struggle with it. We look for any escape! And it’s also so hard to wait! What you’re doing is both! And still able to think clearly, articulate your feelings, and share with us! You are amazing!

Well done for getting through another day. This must be so hard for you. But take each day one at a time. Keep sharing your journey as I am learning so much from you that I could help others in a similar situation. Thank you ❤❤❤❤❤

We all know the process hurts; but you are still here, and don't think you are not helping someone else, because you are being watched by someone who needs your experience. Win the fight for yourself, and those who are learning from you. 🙂👍💕

You wanted to be in the hospital and you said you could not wait! So you are there now just stay and get the help they are willing to do for you ,they work for many patients like you in your condition 💗please just stay my friend 💞 Praying 🙏 for you blessings from Florida 🙌🌴🌴

I am close to you and I embrace you. A caress from Francesca, who writes to you from Italy to tell you that you are absolutely capable of facing all this. Soon you will look at your gorgeous face in the mirror and be distracted by the sunset, the sweet raindrops and the strength you didn't know you had. With much love and good thoughts for now and tomorrow. You'll get better soon, I'm sure. A huge hug ❤

I love the story about the music and the man at the end. You have great compassion and it takes a lot of strength to show love in that moment!

Fantastic seeing you there. You actually look a little better, keep up that wonderful work, don’t let those negative, and destructive voices win. You are winning xx

You can do it, you are the sweetest soul, you seem so innocent and simple. I been trough the same road, and fully healed more than 10yrs now, I have very healthy relationship with my body and food and I know you can do it too !! All the force power to you dear !!

Once again I know how horribly hard it is to be an ED inpatient. To feel that loss of control, that stripping of your coping mechanism with seemingly nothing in its place… I know. I know how harsh some staff are. I know how hard the weigh-ins are- do they force you to do a urine-test first to check for water-loading? I know how deep the desire to run is (although my last inpatient stay Was as a child,15, so I had no choice whatsoever). I know how hard the swelling is. I wish I could share my brilliant outpatient team with you. I wish I could tell you it will be ok. But I can’t. I can just tell you I am sending all my love from Australia. I hope you are stronger than I have been and fight on. ❤

Hi Angelique, I still have so much faith, that you will stick it out and keep going forward with improving your health, even though you suffer, mentally as well as physically. We pray you get stronger everyday. Like you said, focus on the positive. So glad you are getting visitors, you need good company, to lift your spirits.😊❤️🙏🙏

I want you to know I understand your conflicted feelings. I pray for you to heal from this ED. Physically and mentally! I found the mental side is the hardest to overcome. I know common sense tells you one thing, but then the sick, triggering part of your brain tells you to fight it. It's worth it to be in the hospital for help. I've been there when I was struggling with Anorexia. I was the oldest one at the time, at 36. That's been 21 years ago now, so it can be overcome, through trusting in God and medical help. I don't know how you feel about therapy, but it helped me, also antidepressant meds helped break the ED thinking! Keep going! You're doing great! God wants more for you than this! Praying 🙏 for you! Kristi

You are such a Blessing to so many, this is so helpful,thank you, much appreciated,I use Joel's inspiration cube daily,it helps me so much,I know preaching isn't for everyone,but it's so helpful to me.

I am so happy for you, how strong you are. And how amazing it is, that people from all over the world are supporting you. You are in our thoughts all the time and it's wonderfull seeing you getting better. I don't have ED, but I know what means suffering when you hope to survive hour per hour. And when this lasts for months. Our bodies are miracles, what are able to survive.

So good to see you again and also sad to hear you’re having such a hard time. It helps so much to get out of your own head and realize that there are others having even a worse time than yourself. Keep spreading the love and it will come back to fill your heart too. ❤️. You are strong, worthy, and lovable. 💪😇🫶🥰

Glad you have been doing a daily video. I think it helps you a lot. Please keep up your strength. Lots of love Nicole 🥰🌸

Today I had a minor back pain and it turned my whole day upside down, and I thought of you Angelique, how easily we give advice without knowing the pain. 🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻 Proverbs 16:3 Trust your affairs in the hands of the Lord, and your plans will succeed.

Hi sweetie! ❤ Everything does have a consequence. Please please when it’s so hard, dark and cold spiritually, mentally and physically think I WANT TO WALK, I WANT TO WALK AGAIN!!! ❤❤❤ sending you all the love and prayers my dear. We are all rooting for you, and will be overjoyed to see you walking on camera. 🥰🥰🥰

When will you find out what damage has happened to your body? Will some damage be temporary and some be permanent? I'm so glad that you are intelligent enough to understand not to run away. Prayers

I’ve never had an eating disorder before, but I went through restricted dieting and eating irregularly during my high school years. No matter the weight I lost, no matter how “pretty” I felt as the number on the scale declined, the sicker I felt. More depressed I was. Unhealthy I was. I wish you the best on this journey and hope you take the help that is offered to you. You are beautiful, you are strong, you are wonderful. You will overcome your obstacles if you WANT to. I’m a mama to a 1 year old boy and a 3 month old girl. I couldn’t imagine the heartache and pain if seeing your baby hurt themselves everyday. You are important and special to your friends and family. Make the change. Choose life, sweetheart. It truly is wonderful to be alive. ❤

S0 proud you have made it 3 days....keep fighting....like you said one day at a time. It's all we have anyway....we are not promised tomorrow and yesterday is gone. You got this I just know it. Keep smiling, crying whatever you feel like doing we will be here to listen no matter what. Much love and prayers going up and out to you sweetheart.

One day at a time. You got this. This is where you are supposed to be. Everyday brings you closer to your goal..

Moedige Lique, je hebt zoveel kwaliteiten in je! We geven om je, dat weet je toch wel, blijf a.u.b. altijd zo authentiek jezelf en probeer ondanks deze ellende elke dag ook een lichtpuntje te beschrijven. Bijvoorbeeld een mooie zonsopkomst of zonsondergang of een vriendelijke glimlach. Dat houd je wellicht op de been. Elke dag zijn er weer nieuwe kansen, vergeet niet : je bent zo sterk! Go for it powergirl! Je kan het! We steunen je!

You are doing so good love. I am so proud of you for fighting and knowing what is best ❤ much love ❤️

It is great to see you getting and looking stronger God love you from Bridget keep it going I beg of you ❤️🙏❤️🙏

I love your updates! Thank you!

Sending love and prayers and echoing everyone else's comments about how proud and inspired I am seeing how you approach a situation in which our bodies and minds are hardwired to say RUN! It is sad that your family is not here for you. But we can't choose our family and you have your " real" family....those who love and cherish you for who you are and want the best for you. Including your RU-vid family. You are very much family to me and you give me so much. Thank you 💕🙏💖

You’re doing great!! I look forward to hearing from you each day. Praying for you!😊

I am glad they are there to help monitor everything so you can get healthy in a safe way.

Angelique-- your honesty is appreciated. You are clearly very introspective, and girl, you can DO this! You grow through what you go through. You can do hard things because you are human!

Hi Lique, I enjoyed your story about the music. You handled it wonderfully! So happy to see your post today and I look forward to more. Keep fighting, you are so strong 💪!

It is not ridiculous, it is completely comprehensible that you want to run away. This is a place that does help you but that does not accompany it in a way that they take care of you as a being with feelings and that needs to deal with that. In one way it is a struggle with yourselves, but in one way it is also the struggle that the health care institution is not aligned with you as a person, so that makes it even more difficult. You are really aware of what is happening with you and that is a good starting point. You are really doing a good job

it warmed my heart when you’ve smiled. with a beautiful, sincere smile. i am so proud of you… you believe in yourself and you believe in love even when these terrible terrible feelings arise and you’re in great pain. what a brave human. what power you’ve got inside of you. don’t ever question if you’re good enough. you are meant to be happy.

I often take it minute by minute or hour by hour as long as your showing up your doing well even if it takes snail steps to get there. Sending you a warm hug from afar.

Stay strong and confident beautiful Lique 🙏🏽 You’re not alone and you can and will still bring so many positive things into this world. Big hug 🤗

Very proud of you…!!! At the end of the day you are sooo in touch with yourself & have so much insight as to what you need to do & that is stay there & fight through it & see the light at the end of all this. ✨✨You have the inner strength to do this & get physically well & stronger. Your mindset & heart are exactly where they should be…. You are beautiful inside out & very strong & wise - keep the Faith.... 🤍✨🙏🐨Love the quotes..& your honesty. TY Angel 😇

Darling you are a very strong woman and a huge inspiration. Recovery from Ed is a hell of a journey, but there is light at the end of the tunnel. You just need to hold on, keep taking deep breaths, and keep telling yourself this sucks and it's uncomfortable but I'm doing the best I can and it won't last forever. Recovery had a lot of lows and some highs smiles and tears. The hero inside of us is not the one who is happy all the time. The real hero inside of us is the one who is going through all the struggle and pain, yet persevered and never gave up. G-d gave us a challenge that only we ourselves can overcome. Things will always be brighter on the other side. Human nature is also to escape the second something is uncomfortable for us. That's the natural response the second something is hard we run like we are running from a bear it's fight or flight mode. As much as it's hard we need to stick it out. At the end of the day you are the only one who can make your own decisions to get better. You are trying so very hard but just hang on. The pain doesn't last forever. There will be highs and lows. The high is a gift and the low is life which we need to keep strong. Also you say you have the urge to run away. That's very understandable but at the end of the day the last time you ran away from a situation did it help you? What makes you think this time running away from a problem will help? You hoped and prayed to get to where you are. You thought it would be a Mirical to go. G-d gave it to you so it's obvious that you need to be wear you are as much as it's hard. If you leave will that cure you? Are you able to cure yourself? What you really need to do at the moment is to stay put and just pray that you have the strength and to have more encouragement. You got this, sending my love, and cheering you on! ❤️❤️