Timestamps ❤ 00:00 - 6:17 INTRO and TMS Charity Walk details 6:17 - 18:55 Dilemma - I’m dating a ‘broke’ guy? 18:56 - 39:43 Can women REALLY have platonic friendships with men? 39:50 - 50:00 Changing boundaries and competing with spouses 50:22 - 1:01:18 Friends with exes and friends with benefits 1:01:18 - 1:08:44 Navigating friendships with men
Advice for the girl, right guy but wrong timing. Stay cordial and friends but move on. That man is building and when he is done there is no guarantee you will be the one he chooses. He does sound like a great guy, but it is never a good idea to date potential. Keep a pin in him and if God wants it, the universe will bring you two back together when the timing is right.
I agree with this as well. NEVER put all your eggs in one basket when it comes to potential. I also don’t like the ‘scarcity’ mindset OP has when she says “risk losing him” because girly, he is the one giving you the option to leave, and risking losing YOU to someone else. Idk to me a man that really wants a woman and sees a future with her would ever risk that chance.
I love that you brought up the friendship with your male friend and getting to know and befriending his girlfriend. That's what my best friend did. I have a male best friend of 20 yrs and when I began a relationship he became friends with my now husband and we are all best friends now lol. (He was my husband's best man at the wedding). Anyways... that was an excellent point and loved the explanation of it.
In regards to the dilemma, he could be lying, because nothing he’s claiming can be verified at this time so tread lightly & don’t pay for him, do low budget or free activities but don’t ever let a man sell you a dream that can’t yet be verified and swindle you out of your money.
Girls that duet at 19:14 had me cackling, I'm so glad I'm working from home and not at the office I would have been on the floor with the coworkers staring 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
and this is why you guys deserve all the accolades. the part where Courtney said stop showing up face beat to the nines, bandage dress SENT ME because she's speaking straight facts. you say you want a friendship with the man and yet every time you see him it's another chance for you to advertise yourself in an attractive way.
I have married male friends and I have the best relationships with them (solo) as well as their families. Thankfully, there is no sexual chemistry nor attraction, just genuine care and boundaries are respected. My single males friends however, have been more challenging. One of us will always catch feelings and the friendship ends.
This is my favorite episode thus far. It's honestly all of that. Don't have sex with your platonic friends , respect boundaries of your friends that are in relationships. All that *finger snaps*
My guy friends, despite being romantically interested in me at one point or another, have given me great advice. This guy kept standing me up and I kept excusing it because his grandmother died or family emergencies kept popping up. My friends said If he was in too much grief to date, he should have stayed off the market.
I clicked on the notification so fast 😂 I'm a 20 year old girl in a 2 and a half year relationship, and you two really read my mind with the topic of this video. I literally just got back from taking a walk with a male friend. I find him attractive but I'd never do anything with him (he's a Muslim while I'm a Christian, and I'd never jeopardize my relationship and hurt my boyfriend like that. Plus, he's got his own long distance girlfriend). As always, you two are so eloquent and inspiring. Love ya ❤️
Thanks for sharing sis! Definitely important to maintain boundaries and actively focus on continuing to pursue your partner! Hope this episode brought some clarity and practical tips, and wishing you and your community love ❤
I lost my childhood bestfriend because of my looks his (girlfriend’s) couldn’t accept the fact that we were ONLY FRIENDS! Eventually he was given an ultimatum…. So I just fell back.
23:45 definitely get that, I think I'm moreso just awkward around them in general. Like I was introduced to one of my friend's guy friend, and he was going in for a hug and I went in for a handshake. Sooo embarassing.
the amount of comfort and closure I got from this episode ... I really needed to hear some sisters' advice and tell me that it is not ok to have my boundaries overstepped, that it is ok to have needs and wanting to have those needs met by a partner. I think I'll take some time and reflect on my relationship(s) with men and how to move forward from here on to ensure my happiness and peace of mind. thank you so much Courtney and Renee, all the love and goodness you two are sending out is being received :)
Advice for the girl, keep contact with the guy as friends but keep your options open. Yes he sounds like he has potential in the future, but it sounds like most of his priority will be work. There are men who can provide quality dates and have great character too!
I agree with the group setting suggestion. This is also true of your female friends, how do their brothers treat them? What kind of dialogue do you see them engage in with your female friends and how does that influence their romantic partners? What are your interactions like with your female friends' siblings? Also, if you're doing group projects with male friends do they ask for your input? Do they delegate duties to you without asking you if thats what you want or is there choice involved? In group settings, what do you discuss? Is the conversation typically centered around an activity? Do they typically control the conversation? What are most of your conversations about? How do your male friends view women? Relationships? Love? Trust? Marriage? Sex? Monogamy? Religion? Worldview? Growth? Evolution? Spirituality? Friendship dynamics? Leadership qualities? Ethics? Problem Solving? Social contructs? Compatibility? What is their stance on communication? What do they deem as healthy relationship dynamics? Please consider their family dynamics and experiences will determine what they view as 'typical' with respect to relationship/friendship dynamics and therefore how they will offer advice to you or their friends.
I totally agree that "situationships" with friends is a no go (unless you are BOTH within the polyamorous/ethical non-monogamous community). Love the episode!
I love the impact that you guys are making. I feel blessed to have found the podcast. I learn so much from every episode I watch/listen to. Sending you love from Nigeria🇳🇬❤
Haven't got into the episode but I can tell this episode is going to be good!! I feel like personally, I've internalized this idea that men can't be friends with women and I act way differently around men in general (also single and never been in a relationship). How do you suggest I deal with this?
I think this is depending on context and also the specific person. And you haha. I'm more of a tomboy when it comes to my interests, so I vibe well with guys, because we can share the same experiences, passions and frustrations. What I'd do if I were you was: Broaden your horizon and maybe pick up a hobby that is more "masculine" and socialize with the guys there. There are some weird people, not just men, who will view the other sex as a whole new species, but this can also come down to insecurity in their own romantic and social skills. Don't sweat the small stuff and don't worry about these people I also listen to a lot of male centered podcasts and shows to help me understand what men struggle with in their day-to-day lives. I enjoy learning how they think and feel and what drives them. After all, we are different and I cannot intuively understand them. Another point is: If you view them as purely "male", meaning: a potential romantic interest, you will never be able to just socialise with them and be friends. Try to talk to guys who you aren't interested with, so you don't have to deal with any feelings. Imagine if you had a brother who told you the exact same scenario inverted: "I can't be friend with women, they are so different" how would you react? What would your advice be? Sometimes us women can also generalise and objectify men. Try to let go of expectations in social situations. Never having been in a relationship makes this more difficult, but don't stress about this
It’s so crazy that I am dealing with this right now while I’m my healing journey… after a few bumps in the road the man I was interested in told me he no longer wanted to pursue me but wanted to stay friends
I think you can be friends with your male friends. But I believe that 90 % of times one party or both will catch feelings but most times it can pass cause you value the friendship and know It is never going to be romantic. So it will is still friendship but I think for sure transient romantic interest occurs but the boundaries kinda make those feelings that may crop up dissipate.
Yes, its possible....But I DO feel a way when my male BFF starts dating someone. I have ABSOLUTELY NOO attraction nor romantic interest in him, but I think I don't want MY easy breezy friendship and fun activities to be interrupted or BLOCKED, by another person. Lol, sounds a bit selfish, as I type it out. I won't set him up with any women, because he is a hot mess and a bit of a chauvinist...and I don't want to be responsible for bringing that energy into another woman's life. I don't have to worry about it, because I'm not dating him, and have nothing to lose there... I can laugh at his quirks and boldly tell him about how his behavior may come across to women. Sometimes he even listens...lol
