What Betrayal Trauma Does to the Brain | The Impacts of Partner Betrayal Trauma 

The most difficult part for me, is NOT the loss of trust in others, but in MYSELF. You can no longer trust your ability to see people as they really are.. like you can’t trust yourself to make good decisions or judgements, and it pervades everything.

Family betrayal hurts to the bone.

Betrayal is basically: The death of your heart.... 💔

Parental betrayal trauma is the worst. It sets you up to continue the trauma in your relationships.

7 months pregnant and I find out that not only has my husband betrayed me, but infected me with an STD. Pain, humiliation, and anger stayed with me for a long time. Thankfully my son was healthy.

The shutting down is very real. Lack of hope for a better future is also very real. Being hyper vigilant, not trusting others and feeling over whelmed also very real. You become so isolated you are in a nearly vegetative state. The analogy of being in a car wreak, but there is no blood or broken bones, is spot on, you have been emotionally wrecked and emotionally altered.

We all feel betrayed by our government, our mortgage & insurance companies, our legacy media lies. Betrayal is running deep and ruining our lives in these times.

This is the best description of what I’m going through. My wife (ex-wife) cheated on me almost 10 years ago. I thought we got past it, but I never really did. Then she cheated on me again with one of my closest friends. We’ve been divorced for 6 months, and it feels like I’m stuck in a loop. No only can I not trust them, but I’m afraid to trust anyone. The 2 closest people to me lied to me for so long, I can’t help but question everyone else’s intentions. I’m always on guard and always waiting for the next betrayal.

This is the best description of betrayal in a relationship, that I have ever heard. Society seems to think that you are to brush yourself off and keep moving, and even when you do, you feel like a shell of a person. All trust is gone. He really understands this.

As a 100% disabled gulf war veteran, the betrayal of the US GOVT to experiment on 200k troops left a huge hole in my heart under pain of COURT MARTIAL, but I love my Republic to the core.

5 years ago I found out my wife of 15 years and three children was having an affair with her Taekwondo Instructor. He was also married with kids. It will never leave your mind. It’s always there. You often “feel” like your were never enough. If not for my children I’d be gone! It sucks.

I definitely had this for years and still struggle at times, especially if i don't stay busy. My former husband just got up an abandoned me after 26 years. Till this day i don't even know why!. Still single 6 years later. The betrayal has been unbearable. Than the loss of my sister and friends gave me trauma. All the grief about ruined me. If it wasn't for God.. i would have never made it.

How do you cope? I'm getting tired of living like this and don't know how much more of this pain I can take. Edit: After almost 5 years together, and years of constantly being lied to, breadcrumbed, gaslit, and given empty promises to change, I finally left. To anyone who sees my comment, sometimes staying when nothing changes does more damage to your mental than anything else

The paranoia is the worse part. I always tell my friends and family that if my wife cut me physically that everyone would understand because they can see the wound. But, I because internal, no one can see how bruised or emotionally cut that I am.

When you are betrayed by your own mother you kind of shut down and know you are on your own. That feeling is still pretty much imbedded, at 70

Betrayal trauma changed my life. Since my divorce I haven’t been able to enter into another relationship, in the process I became celibate. My spiritual awareness makes it difficult to trust or bond with the opposite sex.

If u reading this. U r loved never give up. Stay strong and day by day get through. It will get better. Going through it for half my life

Yes, pornography destroys a relationship in several ways & desensitization of intimacy. Another betrayal trauma is not being there for someone who needed you at a hard time.

It is utterly exhausting to be in a relationship where you always have to wonder who/ what you're competing with, if your partner is being honest, faithful or if he's interested. Always Wondering when it's okay to feel safe again , and if you actually are, or when it will happen again. It's like a darkness that hangs over your shoulder, waiting to reappear & making you question your own self worth all along. Never know if it's me he's thinking about, or someone else, wishing for something/ someone different. The trauma and pain just don't end, especially when they don't admit what happened was wrong.

I went through 2 long term relationships which both ended in emotional betrayal, e.g. they were both lying, cheating and leading double lives. It took me a long time to come to terms with the trauma and cognition dissonance. Today, I prefer to be by myself as I feel I can't trust myself to pick another partner! Therefore, I am happy to be by myself.

It's been 5.5 years, but it still feels like yesterday. 20 years wasted. Trust = Faith. Never making that mistake again.

Really hits home. I experienced all of this. The trauma occurred in 1998 and in 2023 it's still with me.

I went through all of that over and over. Been alone for 18 yrs and love it. It caused me diseases, and trust issues. I'm happy living alone, enjoying friends and family.

If we haven’t experienced betrayal before we certainly all are since 2020. This is the biggest wake up call for us all. We’ve had personal betrayal but also learning our governments have betrayed us all too. I still feel like I’m in an abusive relationship everyday I step out my door !

I think the worst part is when your husband falls in love with someone else and you know it. This has happened to me twice and in between was all the porn. It’s devestating when you lay in bed all alone knowing your husband is in the other room jacking off to porn. I’ll never trust him again. Our relationship is destroyed and I don’t care anymore. We’ve been married over 40 years and I’d say that over 35 of them shouldn’t have been lived together.

Over fifty years I've lived in trauma - from childhood to marriage. I've never been safe.

I was betrayed by my partner back in 1989 and have not had a serious relationship since then. I'm now 63 and am still not willing to let myself be vulnerable ever again. I am totally alone and probably always will be.

Omg. 25 years married and now divorced. You are saying 1000% exactly spot on. It's the most awful state to be left in.

13 months later I struck a friendship with a lady in a similar situation. We became friends, then best friends & one day I realized I love this woman. We were married in 2017 & I love her as much or more today as I did in 2017. I love just hanging out & being with her. I have a good relationship with my children & Angela's children. Life has never been so good. Dont ever give-up. There is a person for you out there. While no one is perfect, find someone who allows you to be 100% yourself & loves you in spite of it lol! We have an amazing sex life. We share 100% and never lie to each other as we have no reason to. We dont judge & love unconditionally.

I was 'raised' by a narcissistic mother who to this day deliberately tries to hurt me though no longer has the power (I am 68). This is another huge form of betrayal - not being able to trust someone you instinctively should trust. Now, unfortunately, when I see it in any other family member (and it does live on), inside I shut down toward them and genuinely don't like being around them. If I see any of the patterns that I know so well, I am simply unable to FEEL compassion (though I easily feel it for genuine people) even when compassion is the normal response to something horrible in their life like cancer if they are exhibiting narcissism at the same time. I seem to shut down to all but people that I perceive as authentic. I don't like it, but I am really repulsed.

I'm just seeing this a few months after definitely finding out my husband committed adultery. I have gone thru ALL of these emotions and actions. Husband is denying he was unfaithful but I look at actions and I already knew he would lie. To tell the truth, I was given dreams several years ago that he has been doing this. Most High, help me and all partners that have dealt and going thru partner betrayal👐

Whoa! Going through all of this only with my family. As a single mom I got a diagnosis of cancer and moved in with my parents because of invasive treatments only to find out in the process that my family really doesn't care if I live or die and doesn't care about my son. This type of abandonment and betrayal in a severe situation like that really hits you in a million different ways.

Your description is exactly how I described it to people. I was walking in a beautiful meadow: the birds are singing, everything is fine, it’s a sunny day. I’m enjoying all the sensations of this beautiful world around me, then a Mack-truck comes out of nowhere and hits me.

HOLY CRAP....THIS IS EVERYTHING I'M DEALING WITH. I feel like I'm going crazy. I don't know what is a lie or truth anymore. I can't sleep, going through mania, shaking....everything in this video is my life. I don't even know who I am anymore

This is one of the most destructive experiences a person can have emotionally and mentally, and it often creates a life long insecurity and battle to overcome the effects. It's a wonder this isn't spoken about more often considering how common and how destructive it is.

This is so accurate... Words cannot describe how bad betrayal trauma is

I am 43 and I have had betrayal trauma my entire life from the toddler years from almost all my family members and significant other.I don't know if there is one person I truly trust in my life. Maybe the little ones because we all know how honest they can be❤.

I was betrayed and abused by a boyfriend 35ys ago and have suffered from PTSD every sense. 😔

I AGREE WITH SOME OF WHAT YOU ARE SAYING ONCE THE PERSON WHO HAS BEEN BETRAYED ACCEPT WHAT HAS HAPPENED AND SLOWLY START LOOKING AT THEMSELF AND LIFE IN A DIFFERENT MANNER AND IF THEY HAVE AN RELATIONSHIP WITH "GOD" THEY LEAN AND DEPEND ON "HIM" TO LEAD AND GUIDE THEM THROUGH THIS MESS!!!

I am exactly into this mode because of Narc Abuse & Betrayal. And it's been 6 years, I don't want to be in a relationship ever again!!! That's how bad it hit me. I even isolated from the world.

Here's the thing... He provided me with what I needed, so desperately. When he abandoned and betrayed me, he raped my soul. He left me, and replaced me for another. In exactly three days, it'll be exactly seven months since he did so... And I still can't cope. Can't heal. Can't breathe. My soul is raped. Rage and grief rape and consume me. He was my "best friend". We spoke every day. He was the only friend I had. What he did, was soul rape. I am tortured and tormented and bereaved, inside. My heart is in so much pain, it physically hurts.

You forgot parental betrayal. When they promise if you help them financially, they won't allow the abuser to come back....but then they do and now you're stuck supporting the abuser and it's all made to seem normal because "you're helping out the family."

I fixed my future by never trusting anyone again. Single and I wouldn't have it any other way. It's great getting a good night's rest.

Betrayed at 19 by the only person i ever loved. I was just getting our life started, full of hope and actually happy, then she left me for some guy she was cheating with. She told me "you're the best boyfriend I've ever had, but i need to be with more guys to make sure you're the one" 💔 never bounced back, and I'm 32 now. So much has happened, but long story short... I hate myself, my life, people, the world... pretty much everything but kids, animals, and God. I'm angry at myself and don't trust myself either. I've done drugs, achohol, porn, etc. Which I never thought I'd do. I tried to kill myself but failed because I was too afraid. All started from Betrayal... if only I listened to God and waited till marriage

I was on a 20 year marriage to a woman whom did not love me. She acted as if she did until our children were born, then no sex and she just got more & more distant. I never changed. I still havent, other than maturing & slowing down some. She filed for divorce and she did me the best favor anyone ever has. I wanted to be close to my children, but they were almost grown. I was heartbroken, as I gave my family all I could & worked like a dog to provide.

Thank you. I've been dealing with different forms of trauma since childhood. My dad was a narcissist, I figured this out by watching multiple videos about narcissism, and my ex wife. It's always good to find more information about what's going on with myself. I do not wish this upon anyone. No one should ever have to experience it.

Im 67yrs old and the betryal started in early childhood. It has affected me all my life. I only became aware of what my life was all about 4 yrs. Ago. I thought i was normal all those years, and now its like a freight train has finally run me over. The golden years of retirement was started red. Good news, i understand me and now am getting help. Don't give up on yourself. Life is still full of blessings. .

This terrifies me. I'm lucky to have seen my betrayals unfold over the course of years in my family; a sudden betrayal would turn me into either Batman or Joker. I can already feel them lurking beneath my social mask, almost as if they are one and the same warlike entity.

The betrayal of being married to an addict/alcoholic/liar...explains it to the "T" - trauma. The physical pain is literally unbearable...but THEY are the one who has been betrayed, right? You didnt respond correctly to their lie exposed, etc. Thank you for this! ❤

What about being betrayed by your parent(s) in childhood when your brain is still developing? How do you ever make up for that later in life?

I caught my husband in a motel room with a woman. The hardest part was the feeling of death, that he died but was still alive and walking. he tried to hand money to me at one point and as I looked at him I thought in my mind I will say... and when I opened my mouth all I could do was scream. this was 35 years ago. I have gotten over it and have a good marriage, to the same man. Prayer saved me. Thank God!!

Thank you for doing this work. I was betrayed 18 years ago and we went to couples counseling and the counselor blamed me for my spouse actions. I felt re-traumatized Finding the right help is so important. I am no longer in victim mentality and have done a lot of work to get healthy but my systems were overwhelmed and I was a parent to 4 children

Don’t forget the parents who are alienated. The many times that betrayal happens goes on for years and years, with each person in your life.

All praise to Jesus Who's unfailing love has healed all the broken places in my soul after years of toxic relationships and deep betrayal.

Thank you for explaining how it feels to have a loved one betray you! My usually sweet and understanding doctor scolded me recently for continuing to feel upset 20 years after the incident. She was the only one I felt I could still trust to talk about it. "Get over it", she said. I felt betrayed once more by her and I told her I felt like I had PTSD. That was the only way I could explain it. My sons have resentment toward me now for my depression and tears at the time the event occurred. I believe they feel I was a bad mother. I am 68 now (my ex-husband left me in my 40's), and I will always be scarred. It is a very misunderstood phenomena. The point is I don't have any romantic feelings for my ex-husband, but I will always be devastated by how he ruined our "perfect" family and emotionally and financially ruined us.

Jesus Christ is the only thing that can take this pain away. I tried it all and nothing gave me peace like Jesus did. I stopped trying to “fix” and “make” everything happen. I give it to God and realized He has a plan for me. We all need a savior and Jesus Christ is that 🕊️🕊️🕊️

Boy, this guy knows what he’s talking about. I had every symptom he is talking about, two and a half years on , it gets better. You can get through.

I have dealt with homelessness in youth, drug addiction, and losing friends to self harm. Nothing destroyed me like what my wife did. Having two children with me, only to cheat on me and abandon us all and moved 1500 miles away. Here we are all now in therapy and she was with her new one true love in a week, maybe before she left, who knows, all I know is I have to be strong for these kids. They are only 5 and 7. I am 32, I can take a hit, these kids got the Mack truck too though, and now I have to figure out how to put their pieces together while I’m still picking up my own, whose piece is which, wait no that’s not your piece that’s my piece, okay this piece belongs to my son here ya go, okay this piece is my daughters. It’s the biggest challenge I have ever faced, but I can face it. I have to.

That's exactly what my 25 year marriage was like. He was traumatized also so I kept thinking if I showed him I was worthy of his love he would come around. Just the opposite. He got tired of me asking for more of him than he was able to give. I got really sick and fell and was unable to barely walk. That did it. My Dr. told him he would need to step up for me. Nope, we divorced.

After being in a romantic relationship with a narcissistic psychopath, these videos on RU-vid are right. Too bad help isn’t financially feasible for everyone. I’ve been stuck in the numb, isolating, no energy and definitely not myself for about 3 years. No trauma specialists nearby, no insurance and due to fatigue and depression- able to work just enough to survive.

Thank you ,absolutely true. Being raised by a narcisstic mother and married for decades with a narcissist ,cptsd and so sick for years. Working still on my healing.

All of this is true! The good news is we can heal. I have healed! And I am living a fulfilling life.

"Your fear center hijacks your normal functioning" - absolutely accurate! Thanks for helping me recognize what's been going on. I've been working to recover from family betrayal for several years and I'm functioning much better now but it's still a challenge. Mindfulness work has been a big help, remembering my life is much different and counting the many blessings in my present life situation on a daily basis has brought me a long way on the road to healing.

I completely shut down. I go right to bed after work, in the guest room, and do everything I can to stop thinking about it. I’m empty and worn out. I don’t have energy to leave, or get out of that guest room. I was using sleep as a way to cope but now I have nightmares. There’s no escape from this feeling. This is my life now, and I hate it so much. I don’t live, I exist and can’t wait until it’s all over. I’m not worth anything.

My very own closest Family... betrayed me in the past and literally threw me to the wolves.. As a result .. today I trust no one however good & noble their intentions may seem, it's really sad, as now this attitude is hurting me a lot 😮😮

Listening to this brought tears to my eyes in the last minute, because your words are the words I have tried to explain to my husband. These same words came from me without the influence of hearing them from anyone else. My husband has been repeatedly betraying me, but he’s one heck of a liar. My weight has plummeted. Lord bless you and your work and ministry. 🙏✝

Without FORGIVENESS there can be no healing.

Betrayal trama has made me a more resilient, self-reliant, truly independent, more knowledgeable, creative, far less gullable person. In order to allow no possibility of the very negative events of those horrible betrayals repeating, I decided to make it impossible for me to ever meet anybody capable of being so cruel again. I terninated all interpersonal, social, connections, and contacts, moved far away, and got a job working nights, completely alone. I now live in a very rural area where my nearest neighbour is 3 kilometers away. I do not know her. I only know how she looks from a distance and what she drives. I refuse to know her. I refuse to know anybody ever again. I require no friends, nor a girlfriend, if most people have become what I encountered from 30 December 1998 to 8 August 2000. From what I have detected, people have become worse.

Intimacy anorexia from my husband. You described it perfectly.

Thank you, Dr. Weiss, you're explaining what I'm going through so well. My husband cheated on me, I caught him and his AP (Affair Partner) going on a trip behind my back. It completely crushed me. This was in the end of April this year. I think I'm in a state between numbness, hurt, pain and rage. We are trying to mend our marriage because I've decided to stay after so many years with kids, but the trauma it gave me... I feel so lost and actually abandoned even though I'm still with my husband. Bur that's the feeling I'm having. I've had PTSD before so I unfortunately recognised it immediately. It threw my down the dark abyss. Again. Since I'm Swedish living in Sweden, I'll follow your channel. Thanks again 💗

It destroys from the inside out. Constant uneasiness and stress is what you feel every day. Everything that the Doctor mentioned in this video,as an effect, is absolute fact.

I would like people close to me to be able to see the damage that was done to me. The problem is that they only saw the consequences of that, and ended up feeling offended. I wanted to die every day, and I didn't even have the energy to do it. I was paralyzed, an icy statue, a hunk of flesh without feelings, without hope. These people turned me into the worst version of myself. I get scared when someone tries to be kind to me, when they simply want to do me good, without ulterior motives. Because of my fear of people, I never sought help. A year and a half ago, I spoke to a psychologist, and the truth is that it helped me a little, but it was only at that moment. I don't know what the world is like without traumas, because of everything I've experienced, there are few things that haven't become a trauma. Honestly, I started to see the world in a peculiar way, very far from everything we associate with the common and unusual standards of society. And that left me alone. I recently discovered that I had some psychological conditions, probably having had them since I was a child. nothing to help therefore. I would like if one person hurt another, that they would feel the same pain but instantly. Maybe they would think twice before taking any action, maybe the world would be a much better place, maybe there would be no pain. Or else we would respect pain, as we respect God or the devil. I hope that each one of you who battles trauma or any other problem can find the path to happiness and fulfillment. the path where they can have the future they always wanted. A kiss and a hug to everyone.

My ex fiance had a sceret life. A whole secret life. I was raising his children while he was supposed ro be "working away" as welder he was actually working at a strip club. Had a secrey apartment and eveything to hide his life.. He was hiding everything and pretending ro be another person entirely. Cheated on me with so many people so many times ill never know. My current long term partner ...i thought he was sooo safe. No red flags. Two years in i found out it was all lies too. Major porn use. Was a different perosn entirely then he pretended ro be. All my hard work healing from my first trauma unraveled 😭😭

Yep, crushed and shutdown. I'd rather be by myself than live through that again.

Thank you Dr Weiss for this awesome podcast which travels to the centre scars of betrayal! Few people who have not experienced betrayal are able to understand the after effects of these callous dishonorable deeds when sacred wedding vows are thrown, with gusto, into refuse bins! 🙏🏻

Me and my spouse had grown apart . Then they filled for a devorace , I was removed from the ranch by law enforcement. I had a complete mental breakdown. I lost all . My horse my dog ,everything , was homeless , yes i was totally betrayed by everthing I believed in . I have never felt so much betrayal. It almost completely destroyed me . I have PTSD !

Everyone that is struggling need to learn what narcissistic abuse is. Great place to start and you will learn what to do to get in a better place.

I just dont want to think about her no more. I dont want my mind to romanticize this situation. I just want to forget her

I’ve been betrayed by the 3 people I thought of as my closest friend as a child. I didn’t even realize I was betrayed until I grew up and understood what had happened. After years of depression, hatred in myself, therapy. Months of hospitalization and going through the painful process of trials, I’m only starting to feel « normal ». But deep down a part of me was shattered when I was a child, something I can’t get back. Those days are over, but I will never be able to look back to all of those childhood memories that used to be good memories, because they are all tainted now. I’ve spent years of my life with these guys, we gave them so much and that’s how we got repaid. They used to be our second family … and they don’t feel bad about it at all.

Very true,the trauma is real and the pain,trust,faith and confidence,are shuttered down completely 😢

Satan is like a roaring lion seeing whom he may devour, God's people. However, we have authority over his power's, Luke 10:19. There's power in prayer. Prayers for all who are going through difficulties 🙏🏻 There's power in the name that is above all name, JESUS, he's the same yesterday,,today and forever.

Thank you for making this video to reach out to those who are utterly shattered by betrayal. Everything you described is just so true and so spot on. It's an emotion that I was never ever able to put into concrete words. The scar and hurt will forever remain but it is possible for life to move on.

Thank you for posting this so others can understand the devastation and aftermath going through trauma like this causes and understanding the healing process takes a lot of patience and time. I know I’ve came such a long way, but am not fully healed. Talking about it and helping others is what truly helps since time has past. I believe more of healing is finding someone and learning to trust, because trusting is also a part of the healing process. I could say a lot, but I’ll stop here. I look forward to more of your videos.

Thank you for pointing out all the ways someone can experience betrayal trauma.People usually only associate this with being cheated on.Withholding proper love from your partner can be just as traumatic as being cheated on.

I’m married to my childhood sweetheart for 46 years with 5 children. I lost my first child to abortion at 17. My current husband was the father but we had zero support. We had parental threats. In the last 15 or so years, my husband won’t touch me intimately. I have never been so lonely. He refuses to talk about it. He will kiss me goodbye and sometimes good night but nothing closer. I feel like I don’t know who he is and I’m persecuting myself making up reasons for him. 😢. HELP. Just waiting for God to take me home sometimes😢

My husband left our faith and tore our family in half. He told me last night he took me off of his life insurance. I feel unable to cope currently. I have been strong all my life and am even surprised myself how poorly I am coping. I don't know where to get help or where to go from here. My husband has Multiple Sclerosis. I think he is so consumed with himself I am an afterthought if thought about at all. It took him four years before he realized how him leaving the church has impacted me and our fractured family. He betrayed me early in our marriage which should have been a red flag for me. The hardest part of his continuous betrayals is how alone I feel in my heartaches as others experience him so differently. I feel trapped and in desperate need of hope. I have never felt so emotionally fragile.

I was with my ex for 24 years. He cheated on me constantly, so much so that he had 3 other kids with 3 other women while we were together. He was constantly in and out of jail for drinking and driving etc. then our 16 year old daughter died by suicide and within 3 months he was cheating again. I was already almost dead from a broken heart. Losing a child is by far the worst thing I’ve ever ever had to endure. Then he cheated again. I literally felt myself dying. We finally split for good but my daughters death and all the emotional abuse I’ve been through, I think I’m permanently broken. Im not living, I’m not even surviving I’m just existing at this point. I leave the house to go to work and when I absolutely have to, grocery shopping. That’s it. I have nothing. Im numb and broken

Thank you, this is such helpful confirmation. It's taken me over ten years to recover enough to be able to imagine meeting and trusting someone new - and believe it's possible. I think what made the experience so devastating was that my trust had been devastated in early childhood.

Not just partner betrayal but family betrayal.

I am grateful for the empathy you show and share Doug. As a betrayed I can’t tell you how deep it goes, but you know. Particularly when you never see even a glimpse of that empathy from the person who has done the betraying. Can people in the UK access this help? There is so little of this real support that both you and AR offer in the UK. If you’d consider expanding to the UK I’d love to see if I can help make that happen because this has added to the trauma. the therapists you approach who just have no clue how to deal with infidelity and betrayal. Thank you for this much needed acknowledgement God bless❤️🙏🏻❤️

Everything I experienced that made me believe my mom betrayed me was seemingly supporting everyone except me, especially supporting siblings in similar situations…Additionally, it’s as if she supported those that acted against me…Over and over…Ive always felt alone and unprotected yet I’ve protect the one that should’ve acted similarly with me over and over…Which is why I went no contact

I have been in counseling since 2001 when my wife betrayed me, after 20 years of marriage. It literally destroyed me. I made very terrible choices, such as leaving my job and moving to another state. Many years later, I learned that I had a Nervous Breakdown. I've suffered two nervous breakdowns that I'm aware of. With the help of my gifted trauma therapist I am trying to understand and work through the trauma of my childhood. When I was about five or six years old my father began "spanking" me harshly. My little body would have deep bruising from my lower back and down to the back of my upper legs after he was finished. My mom and I had been very close prior to the beatings. I screamed from her to come and save me from this monster, which she had done at once, but she did not rescue me. When my father started beating me, he and my mom started adopting children. I remember watching my mom get out of her car, as relatives rushed up to her to see my new baby brother. I knew something was changing, but I could not understand because I was a six year old. i can go on and on. I'm wondering about how my mom's betrayal would have affected me.

Not every wound is the one that bleeds. Hello ... life is learning, growing and changing if we wish to practice this. Easier said than done yet it's possible. Hang tight people. Much assistance available . Seek and you shall find. You all got this.🙂❤️✌️

Mine was with my husband, boyfriend, but then the biggest betrayal I ever experienced was from my cousin. We grow up next door to each other. I felt we were more like sisters. My brother was 4 years older as she was and they were great friends. He was a narcissist and a sociopath. He put her on a pedestal and I felt if I wasn't totally accepted by her something was wrong with me. Years passed. I had a great secret that somehow got out. I never knew how much of the facts were told, just that people did know. When I divorced and she was poor and working hard, I thought it great to take her on trips and to give her money. When I mentioned my secret being told, she always pointed to someone else time and time again. We went on a Baltic cruise, many Caribbean cruises, Mexico, different parts of the States, just many places, Las Vegas to boot. This went on for 20 years. Then in 2009, one night she said, in her very superior way, that my boyfriend of long ago called her and told her everything. I sat for a moment - she was in my home in the States, and I felt like telling her to pack and I would take her to the airport. But I didn't. It bothered me so much, this total betrayal as she took and took from me, was unforgivable. Finally, I wrote her a scathing letter and was finished. Should have known that she would tell everyone everything and add more to my letter and to my reputation. I still wonder whether I should have sent this letter - but when I did, I felt a huge weight lighted from me. She was never my friend, and, most certainly, never on my side for anything. She just took everything she could from me and never gave anything back, such as loyalty or kindness. I no longer even leave my house. I have been out two times in the past five years. I do not associate with anyone, only with my two sons. I have lost trust in anyone and do feel very lonely. However, I could never trust again.

This describes me even 15 years later. I notuce that I can not seem to pull my life together. And when one does not have the money for counseling, well....... we stay where we are.

I suffer PTSD. And all shit that come along with it. Anxiety, panic attacks, insomnia. I learned how to cope, how to be strong and achieving woman. Result of domestic violence and childhood abuse. Till a piont.... All you are talking about is so true... I became I frigher, constantly surviving.. Till my mind and body broke. I'm in therapy now. Was the best thing happened to me. Because I was so stuck on surviving not on healing.

It happened to me in 2000; it caused a drug addiction to start in my late 30’s, when I would never have taken drugs before.

Once you have trust issues it’s there and it doesn’t go away sometimes you don’t even have to know the reason you’re like this but your subconscious probably from a long time ago knows the reason

I've gone totally down hill from knowing my partner was doing all them things that U mentioned . I'm not myself, I'm on antidepressants, I don't enjoy doing anything anymore , my brain thinks every second of the day of what he has done and what he is still doing ,I don't sleep. Your words have made me cry because everything U said is how I'm.feeling. My doctor laughed at me when I told her why I was depressed and told me oh it's just what men do with seeing escorts I wouldn't get to upset about it. So no one understand how I'm feeling but you hit the nail right on the head.

This is a good analysis of what happens. Most of us don't think about how deeply we are being affected