What Established Asclepias tuberosa (Butterfly Weed) Looks Like When Coming Up in the Springtime 

Oof, what a pain! There's such a balance there to achieve -- if you don't "water them in" enough, they die, but if you water too much, you get a rot mess. Better luck this time around!

@@nativeflowerpower9942 I found that butterfly milkweed tends to handle the driest most poor soils and sites imaginable. I mean the "tuberosa" in the name mean having a tuber. So below the soil theres one big potato looking root that stores water sugar and nutrients for times when theres no rain. It wont bloom that well but it won't die ether. I mean it's really hard to kill a plant that is native to the area where you live. Now i'm sure if someone is trying to grow it over in europe asia or africa where it aint supposed to be i'm sure that's a whole different story LOL But in my native flower bed I don't touch it at all since I found the plants do better when I let nature take it's course rather than try and suppliment the water and potentially cause root rot. But with my regular flower bed with all these exotic plants I gotta drag the garden hose out there a lot lmfao

(1) Not invasive. There's a type of milkweed that can be aggressive, although not invasive (and this isn't that one), and there's a type of tropical milkweed that northern people shouldn't plant (and this isn't that one), so this one is all good. And not invasive. (2) Honestly, I don't know much yet about the lanternfly so I can't really answer this. Anyone else have an answer on this one?

Well now this is an interesting situation you're in. It's a mildly contentious issue about planting plants that are native to a specific locality vs native to just generally the United States. With a changing climate and various weather oddities stacking up, I tend to veer towards planting things that are native to the United States and not worrying too deeply about native local plants or ecotypes -- do you know what I'm saying? Which makes me think that for you, even though milkweeds and Monarchs aren't native to your specific U.S. locality, we do know that the Monarch migration pattern is changing anyways, which tells me that planting some milkweed there is a positive choice (totally just my opinion). From what you say (wet winters, dry summers), your 3 best bets are maybe this Butterfly weed (Asclepias tuberosa), common milkweed (Asclepias syriaca), or whorled milkweed (Asclepias verticillata). If there's a problem with powdery mildew at your local nursery, you can buy seeds online and grow some seedlings on your own, and then replant them in your yard. You could even try again with that Showy milkweed. I'm imagining you buying seeds from all 4, growing them in planters/seed trays/milk jugs until they're all seedlings, and then replanting all of them in your yard. One of each, planted in each location that you want them, know what I mean? And then that will let those 4 milkweeds "choose" which wants to grow where. Or of course, you can focus on that endangered butterfly's host plant and preferred foods too. :-) A highly worthy cause. Also of note, Asclepias syriaca is a spreader, so if you plant that one, be prepared for it to want to be aggressive.