What It Means To Become a Gypsy Wife | Big Fat Gypsy Weddings 

you did good, its your life and no one can live it for you.

I'm sure he felt liberated too. Clearly you two were looking for different things. At least you got to speak about it before the wedding.

You go girl

I'm indian and the amount of failed arranged marriages (including my own parents) ive seen but they are still trapped in that marriage is just sad. Divorce and calling off the wedding especially if it is the girl that does it is something that our culture really doesn't appreciate. And they always look down on the women especially as if they were the only cause of a failed marriage or engagement. I agree. We must be responsible for our own happiness. Whilst our parents raise us up, they cannot control our life choices especially once we become adults. We are the only person in our lives that should have the last say. The only person that's going to be with as as long as we live is ourselves. So we should so everything to make ourselves happy. Thankfully, my sister got married to the love of her life and I hope I will find someone I love enough and someone who loves me and won't restrict me from being myself to marry in the future. If not, I will stay single forever lol.

I’m curious, why’d you wait till “right before the marriage” to act on this disagreement about you working? Knowing that is socially frowned on, as you said?

It wasn't violet Anne. Joan Elizabeth Furey and two other irish traveller girls from the show were divorced.

@@lah1667 Violet Cannon got a divorce too. So i think that's there the confusion is. Different Violet.

@@oskarwinters1873 OK... No worries... The other one from the show that got a divorce was Josie Mcfayden.

Oh that makes me happy.

I don’t think there’s enough entertaining content for a show but maybe a documentary.

It seemed like a joke. I could imagine by dad telling me that on my wedding day as a joke because I talk a lot and he would say I would scare of my groom lol.

Right or saying she will MAKE her have a go at it" with the relationship if she ever tried to come back home she'd kick her back to him lol so supportive.. not

@@ganjahfairy1557 it's obvious u don't know our ways cos no parents wud ever turn there daughter away if she wasn't happy , I can tell you alot there was said in jest.

Hey she should be glad she has parents and all you made these comments...

I agree that her mother's remarks may have been made in jest but you should, "always listen to the jest". It is their right to have their traditions. One hundred years ago, all women were subject to the same. Be thankful, we need all kinds to make the world run.

In this day and age 😔 I rather be single.

Yes girl!! like my dude can take care of himself! And she should be allowed to be independent..she doesn’t have to be “under” a man she should be “beside” him:)

Even SHE admits she has “nothing to do”. What IS the point of NOT working??

@@mykijiji1958 the male is supposed to “provide” for the obviously subordinate female and “protect” her. A stupid ideology carried out in many non-western and non-eastern cultures.

Why do men hate women so much?They treat them like shit.

Good point. You can't miss what you never had.

But, they might still wonder…some people are very curious.

🤔 I think people can long for freedom even if they have never experienced it. But the younger they are when they marry and taken out of formal schooling, the less likely they will have the resources and confidence to pursue a different way of life. What is sad is this way of life strips them of options. I haven’t finished this video, but she looks sad to me throughout. Perhaps she is just reserved. The mother seems a bit too pleased with herself that her daughter is succumbing to the lifestyle.

Oh wow never thought of it that way

@@tcm087 not to mention, younger girls are usually impressionable and have idealistic views of love, relationships and marriage. They know little of reality which is really sad

Her parents seem like decent, fun people as well.

Let’s hope they are more modern than traditional.

I absolutely agree.

Me too

Are their marriages arranged? There's love Yes? Why can't she work? You make each other happy not just following orders doing what you're told! She left her daddy she doesn't need another one! What do the wives do all day? You can only clean so much! Can they volunteer at shelter's or hospital's? I hope there is Love instead of being a slave! That's not Love that's a form of control! So glad I and many others are not! Do you have an opinion on what happens? Anything. All I can say is be happy with life. Take care and God bless you and your family.

The fact that I just turned 22 the other day. Scary

I didn't get married until 30. I did 3 degrees and now i'm a house wife. Life can still be enjoyable..............just not in a shitty caravan with someone who controls you in a crappy location. I'm not a gypsy, I live in a big house in the country. We just don't need more money.

This😢 She is not living her own life and that’s sad

Lol. "Shitty caravan"

When are women not capable of having children? You can't be a child forever.

I think so too👍🏻

I was thinking the same

And the dress is really pretty too !

If I saw the wedding without knowing it was a gypsy wedding I would just assume it was a normal wedding, very different to other gypsy weddings on this show.

The venue apparently complained that the guests were a nightmare but I don't see any issues personally in this video.

I agree with you. As a mom I would worry about abuse. If my daughter or son came home and said they needed my help or to leave a relationship I would emotionally (and somewhat financially) support them 100 percent until they could be on their feet again.

Domestic violence is huge in traveller and gypsy communities and they all know it, and know it's likely to be a driver in leaving. Her mother is smugly smiling at the thought of her coming home with bruises and telling her to go back to the man. What an awful, disgusting woman.

@@littleblackpistol straight up jealousy. her daughter did something I bet she wanted to do...have a life outside of tradition for however long. I completely agree with your assessment. I watched a lot of these episodes when they were first shown in the US and I don't remember wanting to punch a mom in the face so very much.

This is what got me the most. I've always been told by aunties uncles, my parents, grandparents ANY family if you need to come home. No judgement just come home. Not kick me back to where I came from.

The dogma of 'respect other cultures' certainly comes back to bite people in the ass sometimes 🤣

Me too. I want to have a follow up show.

Same

In the press, Violet Ann was really ticked off about how she and other gypsies were portrayed. She got a job temping where she and her husband are living. There's also not a clear demarcation between Irish travelers and Romany gypsies (which she is). The "grabbing" custom and drinking beer at the cemetery (in other episodes) are traveler things, not something Romany gypsies do.

@@SmidBeach how was she able to get a job when “only the men work” in their culture? I’m surprised her husband “allowed” it. 🙄

🤩 off topic, but you’re the first other Ayla I’ve seen in a long time 💀💀

Yes,my ma was a traveller as well.she raised us in house,s.But we never stayed anywhere LONG.......

I must say I,m proud of my gypsy (nth Irish) blood line.....

I enjoy listening to her stories. She lived around so many different kinds of people and learned from them while her dad looked for odd jobs. Her experiences made her an interesting person.

Not a traveller but I moved countries when I was a kid and it can be really hard moving around. I had kids at my schools who would move around a lot because of their parents jobs and I always felt bad for them because they wouldn’t be able to make any close friends before they were moving again. I think it’s a good idea to travel after you finish school and experience the world but it can be hard for kids.

@@bronwynredford421 I think I have Tinker blood in my Irish background. It would be interesting to find out for sure.

They don't look Romany,though.

They are Irish Gypsy likely

@@thesupergreenjudy no Irish accents, they are Romany. I can tell by Violet's accent, as I used to live next to Romany families in East London. The accent is distinctive.

@@biddylisduff I thought that there are plenty of British born Irish Gypsies, too - so that would explain the lack of accent. They must have been here for generations then and mixed in with Brits as they don't look very Romany

@@thesupergreenjudy you could be right, I'm no expert! As I said, I'm going by the Romany Travellers Site I lived near, some people spoke Romany, some looked very "Romany" with dark hair and complexion, others were Ginger haired with freckles! There was an Irish Travellers site about half a mile away, but the two groups didn't mix. I'll have to learn more about the history..

I watched this episode on "My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding" and if I remember correctly, she was not happy at all. She said she felt like a prisoner. Poor girl. To think they say "22" is "old to be getting married"... but, that's their culture I suppose

Wish her all the luck.. Hope he treats her right. Cause shes proven she doesnt need anyone to take care of her..

i needed this comment. how peaceful and joyful you are ❤️ i wish the same. “doesn’t make him less than a man to hear his wife out!!!” Yess!!!!!

@@kileecollins1274 ty very much❤️

@PinkBubbles ty♥️

@June Bug If she married at 35 she'd be married? But she'd probably have more of her own money and life experience.

@June Bug she would probably have a hard time finding a Gypsy husband.

@@SJ-ni6iy why?

@@Pink-dc4qi She’s going against their values and belief system.

@@SJ-ni6iy Why would anyone want a gypsy husband?

She's divorced and happy now I've read in another comment

Omg id love to see an update on her ​@@khuranapriyanka

Relax it's just a receptionist job at some budget motel. She can do much better

@@izabels04 She describes herself as living in a prison. Is that better?

@@izabels04 That doesn't matter. She was doing something that she was happy with and something that brought her independence. Definitely better than giving everything up and feeling like you're stuck in a prison.

So agree Good at her job. She loves. She could go far. Hope it works out xxx

I feel for her too

Anything she wants. Follow your heart. TRa-lalalala. We are not snow white. We have responsibilities just like men. Different, but equal. Men aren't allowed to be artists if we want to feed our children. Why should adulthood be all fun and what we want either?

22 is reasonable, but 16 too young for me

@@seanservo3105 why would you wanna stay alive if your adulthood is not fun?

I feel bad for her also.

Why feel bad? Going out to work for someone else is not a brilliant situation. My Mum and my Nana didn't work either.

@@laurastuart3814 Having your own money gives you choices

@@suedoyle4526 humans are great at making bad choices.

@@laurastuart3814 so....choices should be taken away?

The outrageous completely OTT wedding dresses are usually worn by the Irish traveller brides, not the gypsy brides.

Sammy Jo's was the best from the Cutting edge episode of mbfgw. Fitted, 20 foot train, butterflies and crystals.

@@Sparrowdean Every Roma sect has garish and over the top tackiiness.

I said the same thing.

@@paigebanks7552 Irish Travellers aren't a Roma sect and what you say is untrue.

Not sure if her boss is Punjabi, but it's ironic that Roma gypsies were originally from Punjab (Northern India) and he was discriminating against them.

He wasn't necessarily saying he was wrong but more that it changes his view that not all gypsies are not like that if their settled.

Yeah and I’m personally not convinced that he’s wrong. From what I’ve seen, gypsy events can be destructive and can really sour a persons view on the culture all together. This particular video turns my stomach because this woman is so precious and she clearly seems to be forced into some thing that she doesn’t want. I just can’t support that and I won’t. I don’t think his prejudices are misplaced.

Why have the men got their faces blurred out? Just asking

@@letscarpethisdiem1988 as someone who was a victim of a violent crime at the hands of a 'settled' traveller family, I would have to say that he's still wrong. And by that, I mean that being settled doesn't change their morals or lack thereof. Because gypsies have struggled over the centuries this has given them the attitude to do all they can for their own survival, and unfortunately, thinking this way can lead to decisions which negatively affect others. There is a lot of crime that comes with traveller/gypsy communities and, even though Violet may be the exception to the rule, unfortunately, if you are associated with bad people you will get painted with the same brush. I daresay that this is probably why her parents no longer live on a gypsy site, but if so then why are they content for Violet to live there. She's a beautiful, intelligent hardworking woman who could do anything with her life, why on earth would her parents be happy to force her into a life of servitude and financial dependence...

Yes exactly

Yeah, it's obvious she doesn't want this :/ Why would she say "enjoy it while you can"

He didn't, they are divorced

@@wynwilliams6977 how do you know ?

Why does it "break your heart" my Mum and Nana didn't work. Why be a wage slave to make someone else rich?

@@laurastuart3814 independence.

@@laurastuart3814 getting the ability to work creates freedom and stability that being a housewife doesn't have if you get divorced your on your own in economic stability at the end of the day being left to be taken care of your husband puts you at risk to just be homeless or left with nothing getting a job becoming independent help you further create space from being homeless or wasting your life away...there is more purpose to woman than just who they marry or even having kids some woman have goals and dreams of success not every woman has to marry some actually want to be the breadwinners and the people who make important decisions for themselves and for the world your limiting woman by asking them to just marry they are more than that.

She isnt

This comment was somewhat comforting. Been with my fiance for 7 years since we were 15. He cheated on me recently....I immediately kicked him out. I know I made the right choice I consider it a bullet dodged. Scary to think how I was about to sign a lease with him and marry him. Still hurts tho and idk why :/ I recognize its for the best but im still heartbroken. I'll definitely be looking into that book tho!

That's amazing

Yess combination of Indian and European genes

😂😂😂😂 She looks like the typical 20 year old addicted to Percocets. Especially how she got serious wrinkles around the eyes already

@@Thesidsentinel is good yp

Facts but I hate that she had to leave her job. I wish they let her keep working cuz I seen on alot of other episodes that the man get jobs but they aren't even good enough and can sentence them to jail.

Respect to her and her parents!

Because she's actually an adult. Not 16

@@nutmegsonuttz8854 true and she can read and write better cuz she had time to work on it.

She doesn't seem very wise tho, mature maybe but not wise.

yeh, it's like having a slave. Yeh he feeds her and clothes her, but sounds like she just lets him pick everything.

I dont know offical numbers or anything, but there is a similar episode with a divorced gypsy mother and she said she doesnt know of any other women in the same situation. Apprarently, just like all these sad videos, its once again the womans job to put up with it. Cant believe they just relinquish their lives to another, when theyre so young.

Divorce rates are very low, even if the woman is mistreated bc its expected they stay with the man NO MATTER WHAT and feed them and look after the children etc. They have no life or education to escape and live on their own sadly.

Very very low divorce rates.

@@L0zzle i really dont get why would they do that though? its not like its a religion where you're promised something in return for your suffering....

Good for you girl

no she didnt and is now divorced

Yes divorced

Is she really divorced?!

@@victoriarubens6002 yes she somehow lasted eight years and didn't have any kids because she was afraid of raising them in such a toxic environment, it sound like a pretty abusive relationship

@@wynwilliams6977 can’t believe it! What a shame for them

To think people have babies as well so young😩

Where?

Yeah. She was annoying.

It doesn't happen overnight. She is an organic, classy, smart young woman and probably waited to get the right guy. If they are still together then she did the right thing.

What's wrong with reminiscing over you history. The past creates the future for all of us.

@@lah1667 what kind of future is this? She looks absolutely miserable. Her parents told her if she comes back they’ll kick her out. She has to marry a man and be happy OR ELSE. This is really the best we can do for our young women? I’m disgusted.

@@sarahdarling6439 she should be able to keep her job if she wants toafter getting married but she seemed aware of what she was letting herself in for when she got married so that was her choice as well.

I AGREE!!! Extremely smart and wise beyond her years!!!

Of course you have to ignore all the other weddings that end in disaster, fights destroying the venue horse races on the lawns...... They make peaky blinders look tame

Still married from what I can find

I was just thinking the same thing 😂😂😂

Does she has a Instagram account?

@@naseanamoodie384 I don't know all I found a news article that said shes been married since this date

She got divorced after 8 years and threw herself a massive “gypsy divorce party”, she went against the norm and loved it!

When she was sitting there and they were doing her hair, she kind of looked like Scarlett Johanssen.

Ok ok ok I o no

@@lesliek4948 omg YESSS she does give off Scarjo vibes

@@BaileyBlurbs she looks miserable and sad throughout this video. It’s obvious she was pressured into this “choice” by her parents and culture. What a sad, retrograde view of life. She gave up independence and making her own money to submit to her husband. She doesn’t even get a say in where they live. It’s pathetic.

@@calisongbird even so I’m proud of her for standing her ground for so long. She’s getting married SUPER late in her culture. I’m proud of her regardless.

Marriage doesn’t mean you give up what makes you happy. Good marriages are best when both are happy.

@@jaxjax3494 yes but in this marriage she's expected to give up everything that's gypsies tradition all of her work just to be reduced to childbearing and chores anyway they did get divorced she seems happier

@@taymorrie5921 how did you know that she got divorced?

@@noura4157 I search her online her name is violet ann

@@taymorrie5921 heaven forbid a woman chooses children and a family over a 9-5. Lol when did modern feminism turn into Corporate hacks

This one wasn’t 11yrs old, some of the stories aren’t that old TLC only quit airing this series only several yrs ago. This one, was one of the last stories that aired and, I know this was not only about 6 yrs old.

@@sonyafox3271 she said that she had been working in the hotel for about 5 years and the hotel manager said she had been there with them since 2005 so yes this one did air around 11 years ago

being controlled, and expecting to have babies ASAP 😱

I was looking for this comment. For a second I thought Stephanie Tanner went full on gypsy. 🤣

That and Scarlett Johansen

@Karebear77 That was my comment as well!

@@MyBiasOpinion SAME!!!!!

I had a good laugh at that one!! Been married 14 years and I don't just "do what my husband says" , and I'm sure he wouldn't have me if I did!! We are equals, a team, we compromise..or it wouldn't work.

@@Totalchaos0228 Exactly!

It’s the culture of gypsies

@@Totalchaos0228 if your husband was raised a gypsy then his opinion would be different. This show is about gypsies not your personal story lmao

@@turkishdelight2013 just because it’s traditional doesn’t mean it’s right. It used to be the same in British culture to but people eventually realised it was wrong.

Get a grip. She's obviously very sad, and was pressured into this marriage. Absolutely not wonderful and magical. Tragic and heartbreaking.

@@sissyfists You have no idea what you're talking about.

I believe it’s a lot about saving face in this sort of culture especially for the fathers.

It's called growing up, not living like adult children

Watching this, I sadly think her mother was a contributing factor. When she said about kicking her back and all that, I was so angry. It’s so sad that these young women become slaves, whilst the males are treated like gods, all because of what they have between their legs.

I feel it was pressure from her mother to have her married. Poor girl. 😢😢😢

Yes but also not because she doesnt really seem happy with it