As a person with a toxic family, I can say that I don't want to swap places with someone who has a healthy family, I don't want they to suffer what I suffer
Actually. I would NEVER wish to switch places with someone else if that means they would have to go through what i go through. Its absolutely painful and the amount of times i called the cops and had to lie is crazy
Yeah I stopped cleaning cuz he always says I'm lazy I'm literally always gets blammed I'm not the one who makes mess. They say I'm lazy and it's because we had phones. It's their fault I was always cleaning before until they starts blamming me that I stopped cleaning. They always gets mad if I don't do what they say Litterally we are 4 and they only asked me to do things sucks. I wished I was never born.
@@Mizuki53I am a 16 yr old girl and the first daughter. My father knew very well that I wasn't feeling fine but he beat me outside the street naked😢. That's feels like the worst thing ever I feel like running away from home
I'd rather not swap our places, wouldnt wanna make someone go through the shit I go through.. let them be happy and smile for their happiness while I die inside :)
No. Growing up in an abusive household you do NOT want to swap places because that means someone else has to take your place and you know exactly how that'll break them. You just want to be and have been somewhere else your entire life.
This was the same comment I was going to write. I personally grew up with a good family but I wouldn't wish bad things upon others. Even if I have to deal with thrm.
True . But I really wished some people who keep telling me that it's not a big deal , I'd definitely want to " make deal with God " and let them struggle to survive in a environment which should feel like home feels like hell .
i have a very healthy relationship with my parents (and my parents too have w each other) but my parents went through a LOTS of toxicity during their childhood. from abuse, violence to deaths. like lots of trauma. they still chose the right path instead becoming toxic themselves like their environment. now they are trying their best so i can live a good life. i love them. i am really thankful
Exactly!! My parents are overprotective, abusive, strict.. basically most Indian parents. But I don't consider it toxic. I didn't even consider getting hit by belts or combs toxic. Maybe overboard or emotionally draining but not toxic. I think I have a pretty healthy family. Mostly because my parents grew up in way worse conditions than me without a good parent to look upto. One of their parents not even being there for them. Parenthood has always been new to them and they are just trying their best for me and that's what matters to me. (This is what I'd like to say to others that first know where your parents are coming from) I do think that most people here actually have toxic families but most of them just like to throw around the word "toxic" without a thought. Or they are young and too sensitive (like I used to be)
my dad grew up in a physically abusive household and thats what made him disregard my mental health problems and justify him self harming infront of me….
I didnt grow up in a t0xic family but, i heared my grandma yelling at my grandpa for no reasons, my dad smoke and before him and my mother split up i tried to have his attention now...he try to get my attention, my mother is supportive asf i love her but she is sick(it doesnt have cure...) and now she is getting more stressed and sad i've seen her having anxiety attacks twice...i was 10, my grandpa died... My brother is living his own life i'am so happy for him..my family is in a poor situation... I'am 11(doing 12 in april 9) years old, never want to swap places with any person, even if their family arent toxic or love they, they also have problems.....
Even though I am one from a toxic family i would never in a million years want God to swap my place with someone else. Like why would I? I know exactly how it's gonna break them. The self harm, suicidal thoughts and everything. I'd never want anyone to go through what I went through, never in a million years.
I literally get jealous everytime I see a happy child, mum and their dad just having a fun or finding out their dad dosen't drink ..it just sucks because we can't even have those laughing moments together or have a normal day without fighting
@@luffluffy7 i said it is easier sometimes to solve them but not always. but it also depends in what level is toxic. i understand that some kids really need fam love which i have and im so grateful, but i really sometimes want to have what my best friend has, that she can stay in her room or go out or have other social cause her parents dont really care about that. im not grateful but i feel so limited because they care too much. but i think that in the end everybody wants the one thing they dont have so..
@@swaraalkunte6707 we know you have problems, but one of those problems is not having your phone nearby whenever your parents argue in case you have to dial the police because that argument may be the last one they'll have, is it?
All I wanna say to girls with toxic families is don’t waste time on relationships when you’re finding yourself. You’re too vulnerable and there is flood of terrible men out there. Either that, or you could end up being a toxic partner to a guy. Focus on your personal growth, explore a little, find out your passions and follow it.
I'm in a relationship and my man is really supportive he has really helped me in my personal growth you can't just blame relationships for everything...
I agree for the most part. I am in a wonderful relationship but I am dealing with so many personal problems (ex: ed, sh, and overall depression) I honestly feel happiest when Im doing what I want with nothing tying me down. I care about him dearly and one of my biggest fears is being horrible to him or overall just being toxic. My emotions are just all over the place 😕
@@rozisszs Figuring out who you are separate from your family. You lose your identity or can’t form an identity when you’re in a toxic dynamic. You explore what you like, your hobbies, your passions, your goals, form opinions on some topics, things like that. Find yourself. Know who you are. Your strengths and weaknesses. What makes you, well, you.
I grew up in a healthy home, my husband grew up in an emotionally, physically and verbally abusive one. We've been married 14 years, and to this day I still see the effects of his childhood on his life. he's almost 40. Every. Single. Day.
i told myself so many times saying that my parent aren’t emotionally abusive its just the day or they are in a bad mood. It really really broke me when i realized that the fights amd everything is becoming an everyday thing.I cant wait to go to college far away from my house so that i finally can have mental peace.
Don't judge other's problems. U don't know what they are going through. Like how some of us hide our emotions, a healthy family may look healthy on outside only
If it's just the outside then that means that's not a healthy family, does it? I know that everyone has their own problems, and having healthy parents doesn't always mean a happy life. Just social media and society in general causes so much distress on its own, that your fam is not the only source of depression. But I have to admit, that if you have healthy parents, you at least are lucky they care for you, as that's what they do. Some of us did not have the luxury to experience that type of familial love. But regardless, I'm sorry if you're struggling. I do have to say that I understand that feeling, even if I haven't been through the same situation
Admittedly, I have a healthy family, but whenever I talk about something that happened they always say "you can't complain, you don't have a toxic family like me" as if bad things can't happen to healthy families
I have a healthy family so everytime I used to tell my friends a story about something in my childhood they be like „oh shut up you don’t have a ToXiC FaMaLy“ Alright so I’m not allowed to talk sbout my childhood because my famaly is healthy alriiighhhhtttt 💆♀️
that is rude but don’t you realize how hard it is to have a family that is just about fights? i have one but i still listen to my other friends “oh my dad this and my dad that” “i went out with my parents” “i am going to see my grandparents” and i feel like shit but i don’t say anything.
@@phoqwu that sucks but if people are never told your home life isn’t the best then they can try to be more sensitive. If you don’t tell them then you have no right to get mad at them about something none of you can control
@@phoqwu I’m so sorry about that ,i think we should just except each other and let each other talk no matter what there famaly is like or what they look like because at the End of the day where al humans and should love and support each other 🫶🏼🫶🏼
Yes,let the people with an abusive childhood alone,i had one of those,and every single time my friends would talk about their life and the good things ,i would feel like the absolute shit,also ,my parents we're the whole pack(abusive,toxic,strict)also,they both died in a car crash ,gladly,i didn't have to deal with them anymore (it happened when i was 18)
My family is really toxic. I don't want to show it to anybody but now I feel suffocated. I'm a girl and I'm 25 rn from India and I live with my parents. My family is hella toxic, I never show it to anybody, I always show bright side of my family to anyone but deep down I'm broken. My father is alcoholic and he controls everything in my life. My mother always yell at us. My parents always criticise me, I can't even explain how they emotionally abuse me. I was a bright student but now I've lost what I had. I have no where to go. I'm suffering from depression from the last 4 yrs. I've no hope for my future.
I feel you so much…it is so heartbreaking and you are so strong! I wish you would find the way how to escape this “stuck in a rut” circle and experience a beautiful life full of happiness.
A healthy family doesn’t mean they don’t have problems outside of the family Partner abuse,rape, bullying, eating disorder, depression, lost love one, etc Trauma is different for everyone some are worse yes but, everyone has some form of trauma
Yeah, I’ve got a nice loving family, dad is a cool guy and mom is supportive of everything but it didn’t stop me from putting myself into ED hell when I was a kid
I just want to say that having a toxic family can in fact be the cause of all these problems ‘outside of the family’.Not to invalidate anyone’s struggles but having a healthy family can most definitely ensure that u don’t suffer from childhood trauma,which lasts forever until u die.
I love hearing people talk about their healthy amazing families. It's how I learned what healthy was so I could do my best to provide as close to the same as I possibly could for my daughter and grandchildren. Plus it feels good knowing not all families are sh*t.
It’s the first part. It sounds like “oh you can’t have any problems because you have a supportive family” I have a very healthy family, but I have to put up with emotional abuse from my friends.
@@Wake-up..thisIsAllJustADream nobody said healthy families dont have problems. its the fact that you receive support and love in your household is the difference. if you had a toxic family and suffered emotional abuse from your friends, your parents would blame it on you and cause more emotional or even physical abuse on you. please dont make this about yourself, you know you can ask for help from your parents while some kids cant.
y’all haven’t felt it until you get your phone taken away for not closing a door Edit: to everyone saying I’m “privileged” for only getting my phone taken away, I didn’t wanna over share but here goes. Basically I got told to close a door and I didn’t, and then I got scream at for an hour and a half, phone taken away and got the silent treatment from my parents for the rest of the night.
Bro the worst punishment as a kid for me was since my family moved to a new country and didn't have enough to buy me a phone my mom would say your grounded go to sleep, because it was summer and all I wanted to do was stay up.
bet you don’t have divorced parents that’s why you don’t understand, it’s an extremely important thing that happens in your life and it affects it tremendously
Honestly I don't wish this upon anyone and don't mind going through this anymore. This is how I got my survival instincts. The reason why I'm pretty strong. The reason I don't let people walk all over me.
I grew up under very shitty circumstances. But that's a me problem. I know I'm strong enough to not let my personal experiences cloud my judgement and ruin my critical thinking skills. Mind over matter. We're all capable of removing our childhoods from ourselves. I believe in y'all
@urlocalfrogdude:) So if i tell someone "Eating an apple is healthy" They gonna get triggered? Healthy means quite a bit of stuff, but i'll try not to assume.
Can you let people with good families be? It's not our fault your family is toxic or abusive, let me enjoy time with my family, I get every family has problems (mine too) but let me enjoy a goddamn hour or a few minutes with family without being shamed
Ye,i understand your pain and i can try to help you,but man you dont have to say "wish that was me" everytime that i am enjoying something with my family,we also have problems and i have problems,there is not a single perfect family,there is better and worse ones,but m8 just let me be
I never wanted to swap places with anyone because how could someone go through everything I had and stay mentally sane. I just wanted out of the house and to be left alone.
It works!! ❤❤❤ My mom and dad stopped arguing They won't have any more arguments in the future like this My dad doesn't ever gamble or spent money in stock markets My mom is not forced stay at school by the principal My mom is again the same as she was as when i was a child My dad doesn't make any more arguments My family is happy now!!
It's always funny when people with healthy families express shock when I talk about how much I hate my parents. They always assume you feel that way over something petty too, until they hear the stories. Some people should genuinely not be allowed to have kids.
I had a good life as a toddler/baby, but now I’m absolutely sick of it. I get told I’m complaining all the time, and I never get time to my self. My dad always yells at me and calls me names, and my moms cheating on my dad with someone I hate.
My mum is literally amazing! She’s always been there for me. And her boyfriend has always been there for me like a dad SHOULD be. My dad doesn’t really do much with me. He lies abt things so I don’t come over. So I sort of know what it feels like.
I hate how so many dad's are POS and most of the "good ones" get praised for doing the bare minimum, while most mom's get sh!t on/told how they could do better even when they're above and beyond.
Umm that’s actually super really super duper offensive to those who are sensitive to that word, u don’t know what they’ve gone through dood🙄😒 GODHSBSJSJSJA
As a kid with a toxic family, i always cry myself to sleep, and i have no one to tell, god my life is so sad and hard i just wanna be loved but they love my brother more
Same. It feels my entire childhood was ruined thanks to my family. My only concern tho is that one day I just shouldn't end up repeating the same toxic patterns I grew up with, thinking they were normal.
Pov: you do that and not only get yelled at about it but get depressed, realized how neglected you are, have your parents easily assume who You are no matter how good you actually try to be, and still have parents complain about how you are when you are out of your room.
You can have a healthy family but bad life, bad school, bad friends, bad mental health, I have a good family but I feel so bad every single day and it's not fun, you wouldn't want to swap places with me because life isn't fun either way, I get bullied, I get stressed, I can't focus on work at all, just alot. Unless your talking about somebody who's actually happy all the time then u wouldn't want to swap with somebody like me ✋
Whenever my parents tell me we’re going somewhere rlly fun, I get extremely excited and that’s what makes me happy the entire day. And when they get back hone they just start swiping their phones and when I ask them ‘So r we going?’ They just say ‘You know what.. lets not go anymore its quite late’ when literally all the festivals haven’t even started and it’s like 6:00 or something. And they sleep at 11:30+. Wow. So real. And then when I confront them abt this behavior they just burst out laughing and they don’t take me seriously. All these festivals happen once in a year or once every four years. Every time we plan abt going there, in the end they’ll just be swiping their phones. And they try to comfort me by saying ‘What do u want to eat we’ll bring u there’ and the next day when I suggest a restaurant they’ll be like ‘dang thats rlly far’ ‘thats kinda expensive’ like literally the restaurants they choose are always 130+ and when I choose a cheap ass restaurant they say its expensive and very far. They always force me to go places with them but when I want to go somewhere rlly near my home and no money needed, they just dont give a sh*t. And every time my brother is also sick so we can’t go. I’ve cried abt this more than 11-12 times bc it always happens, but they dont care. And they try to make it seem like they care abt me by saying things like ‘oh ...i thought ...blah blah blah blah over exaggerating excuses’ but in the end they dont rlly care. Ik these parents aren’t toxic but to me its worse than being tortured. I’d rather die than suffer in this horrible family where no one cares abt me and my brother is the only one that shines in the entire relative/family tree.
I'm so sorry,I know you feel :(( I'm not judging,but I don't think that they're bad to the point of making you wanna die,I get it if you're sensitive (I am and I cry & get hurt for the smallest things so I don't blame you :`) but death & the word "horrible" are really strong,unless you mean it. But still,I hope your parents actually care more about you & your brother and your feelings. I'm glad your brother makes you happy though:>>
nah cause i hate how people with stable loving families complain about their parents being “Too controlling” like it ain’t fun to have parents who don’t care about you
Since my family is too careless about me (they say they love me but don’t show any love from the beginning ) I think I would rather have controlling parents too.. It’s just a choice for me tho
as a kid who came from a very controlling toxic household, both are just as bad. they would never let you go outside and then wonder why you shut yourself in your room. they want you to be smart but dont give you any time to study by always needing you by their side when they vent. they tell you you dont need to have friends when you say that you dont wanna go to school because of bullies, and you only need to study. they say you should dress better but dont give you the things needed to. they say they love you but their actions show that they dont care (not cooking food, asking how your day is, checking on you when your 33° degrees hot, assuming your being lazy when your doing something). they give you necessities (phone for communication, school fees, clothes, shoes, a bed, a life) and then guilt trip or hit you when you dont do everything they tell you to. maybe that person your talking about also has a toxic family.
ok thats just not even thats toxic bro u cant just walk out on ur friend when they try to open up just cuz u wanna open up too??? thats not real friendship
@@dareenkina you don't know anything about her friendship so how do you know it's not real friendship. She might be sensitive to that topic. You never know what people are going through so dont assume.
I have seen in internet some of the people from toxic families i guess easily consider everyone is a bad human and i have seen people assuring them that no their families are very good people. Its sad to see that...
POV you have a perfectly functional family but decide to pick out the most insignificant of disagreements with them to make a tik tok about how "toxic" your family is 😐
Healthy people just shows less emotion but they are always positive. Toxic people just overreact but they are really that happy in life just like me but they struggle to feel positive when in a situation they don't like.
This video reminds me of the day i realized that my cousins didnt like me and they were only act nice to me so I'll do anything they want since i was just a kid , it really broke me when i realize that.
Im a teen intern and work at a place that has stem camps for kids . I get to watch different families interact with their kids in so many ways. There is the protective parent who stays 10 mins after drop-off to watch the kid, there is the busy parent who is on the phone in the lobby but watches their child the whole time smiling, and the loving parent who kisses and hugs their child goodbye. I feel horrible for feeling a twinge of jealousy every single time. I basically raised myself, my parents were too busy for me, were toxic and emotionally abusive to me, im scared every time I see my mom. Like, why couldn't I have what they have. What did I do wrong
This is so true, i dont wanna talk about my childhood because my parents g@mble, Till this day, i have mental breakdowns when i hear them screaming whenever they get very angry at g@mbl!ng
In my husband's friend group, I'm know as the one that doesn't have daddy issues. My husband's dad died of alcoholism, one friends dad is in prison, multiple others have died or abandoned them. My parents came to my husband's house before we married and his friends had a lot of fun hanging out with my dad and listening to his stories :)
@@MillyxxissillyYT-RoadTo600 Still tho, it can still be a trigger word for those suffering with eating disorders, ik it may seem dumb to censor the word healthy. but that’s why it’s censored unfortunately.
Swapping would suck for the person being dumped into the abusive/ toxic spot. And tbh if i were to have grown up in a healthy spot I'd be a whole different person, thats kinda scary when you put it in retrospect!
Ikr. I got screamed at for 5 hours straight, grounded, and forced to stay in my room for the rest of the day for “breaking the rules” and sleeping at day. I also had to protect my 2 year old brother from being “punished”. The reason that they left bruises on his arms, to show that there the adults and that they have more power.
Oh lolololo,gen z ,you 45 or? she's,,soft" bc she had trauma when she was little,you prob didn't have one of those toxic childhoods so,shut the fu#k up
abigayle “stinkwad” merklinger has no clue how tiktok and their moderation works so proceeds to blame “gen z” for censoring their words despite the fact that they have the risk of being flagged or banned 😂😂😂😂😂
Please talk to a trusted adult,like your aunts,uncles,grandparents,teachers,neighbours....anyone!! They can get you out of here. Go to a police station after school,call the police (do it preferably when they're outside or are deeply asleep) my heart breaks for you
@@yomna.is.normal I'm too young to go out on my own and idek where a police station would be. My parents don't wanna get me therapy (I presume since they don't even wanna get it for themselves) and I can't tell any adults around me because they only include my family and teachers who I'm not close to. I wish I could do smth but I can't. Thank you for trying to help tho
Ya cause Same.. all of my friends tell their parents what's going on in their lives but I don't tell my parents about what's going on in my life even though we live in the same house cuz if i tell them what's happening then will just endup hurting me
No I wouldn't want to swap places! Why would I wish the evil that my parents are, upon ANYBODY?! I'm already damaged I don't want anyone else to have to go thru all this.
