What To Do If Your Ex Ignores Your Text

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Clay Andrews explains what to do if your ex ignores your text messages.
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It's frustrating when your ex doesn't text you back. Why can't they be bothered to even reply to you? Well, here's what to do if your ex ignores your messages. You need to first give them a little bit of slack with replying.
There could be all sorts of reasons your ex hasn't responded. And many of them have nothing to do with you. People forget their phones at home or in the car sometimes. People have personal emergencies.
But if you want to get your ex back, then you want to remain focused on clearing the emotional channels between you and your ex. So, if your ex isn't responding to your text message, then you want to use the "close the loop" technique to close out of the conversation. This keeps you from resenting them, and it also keeps them from feeling guilt about not responding.
Other than that, you, of course, need to address underlying issues of why your ex isn't responding if you think it's due to any emotional hangups that they have about being in contact with you. Of course, address those.
**** IMPORTANT ****
This is an internet video, and it should be obvious, but this video and other videos on this channel should not be taken as a substitute for the evaluation of a psychologist, therapist, counselor, etc. This video and other videos on this channel are intended for informational uses only, and only reflect the personal opinions of the creator. The creator of this video is not responsible for your actions or choices or the consequences of your actions or choices.

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Опубликовано:

1 апр 2020

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Комментарии : 69

@ClayAndrews 4 года назад

Thank you for watching. If you'd like to learn more about Connect and Commit, you can find info over here: modernlove.life/connect-and-commit Please, stay safe and healthy out there.

@pupbun2849 3 года назад

My ex was doing it intentionally. It was hurting me like hell. And I promised myself never gonna text him ever again. No matter what. I don't deserve that. And out of nowhere he texted me and I made sure not to text him coz he treated me badly. I can't afford to hurt myself again.

@Jakuboooooooooo Год назад

How long did it take for him to reach out?

@emilymann4056 4 года назад

After the no contact period I feel like I should date someone who deserves me and who would do anything for me in the world

@MB-xv7er 2 года назад

There’s nothing you can do. Accept that they are pulling away from you to find something new. They do not want you and they make it clear by pulling away. Just respect it

@cbshin9483 3 года назад

Thank you for your very considerate video. I can have a right mindset now.

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

Glad it was helpful!. We truly appreciate and recognized that you are one of our avid followers. :-)

@equinox9 4 года назад

Clay thanks for breaking it down like this, I spoke to my ex 7 months after our break up (not organised bumped into her at work shes ignoring my texts) I tried to put her at ease and get us in a grey zone but she said she couldn't remember a time when we were just friends before dating and that shed never been in communication with her previous exes after breakup. I guess I never thought that she could be relationship focused too. Unfortunately when she found out that I was joining her parallel team at work she told our bosses she didnt want any communication from me... guess I just have to wait it out.

@evankolar8957 4 года назад

Hey Clay, I appreciate the videos! They’re great! I’m currently worried about losing my ex. I feel like I’ve gotten hot and cold behavior when getting her back recently. So I feel like I’m on step 3 of getting my ex back. But I’m worried I’m losing her as well. At times it can be a day or so when she pulls herself away and I’m not sure exactly what to do. I feel like I’m getting some hot and cold behavior and mixed signals. She went from making up things just to talking with me and even saying something she didn’t reminded her of me to not even a day later nearly getting ignored. I’m just really confused. Love the videos though!

@ClayAndrews 4 года назад

Hi Evan, Thank you very much and glad to hear that you loved our videos. Remember that getting back together will go through different phases. Don't let your fear and confusion get you off track. You have to focus on the process.

@Angelcool071701 4 года назад

Hey Clay, so my ex and i broke up 2 months ago which during those two months, she still wanted to be friends, but i always initiated the conversation to the point she made new friends and started ignoring my texts and later we had an argument about sharing accounts that she unfriended me on all social media and told me goodbye and that she doesn't want to be friends until a couple of uears and to stop contacting her. Does she still have strong feelings for me or does she not want me in her life anymore?

@v.89G 3 года назад

He is also avoiding me at job.... Even the last time he saw me at the end of August he found me great.. It's so frustrating

@James-bl6ru 2 года назад

What if she replies to my first text then ignored me after that when i reply ?

@macbookbackup7041 2 года назад

What if when you go to close the loop they tell you no I don’t feel weird or uncomfortable (but you know them well enough that they just don’t want to discuss/admit). After you’ve been in contact for a while

@benhartart9487 2 года назад

I texted my ex 10 days ago, as we had talked about catching up for pizza this month sometime she has not replied, I think if I text again and close the loop as you say, there is a chance that she still wont reply then its like a one sided texting lol, so I have decided to put it in the temporary disconnected catagorey and continue with life :)

@jaimeestrada9627 2 года назад

She ignores my texts, and my call after we had an argument last week. What can i do?

@nikhilbhanushali601 4 года назад

it was short term relation(3 mnths) we were sharing good bond togethet bt i ignored her and she broke up. 3 mnths ago. i've also apologised via text but she didnt responded. she is not receivng call nither responding

@Communitychoud 2 года назад

I texted a guy I’d say 2 months later after our last conversation and let’s just say I got ignored. I am really shocked especially as he was the one who said things like wanting to make things better etc (2 months prior) and now he’s just ignoring. Maybe he has someone new I’m not sure but it really stung when he could have just said that even to reject but I guess he chose to stay silent and not bother.

@MB-xv7er 2 года назад

Men get off on doing things like this, trust me. Typical excuse will be “I don’t wanna hurt you”, but it’s all bullshit. My ex LOVED leading me on and giving me false hope and they do this for a few reasons: One, they want to keep you around as an option. If they can’t find a hotter better woman, they’ll keep you on a string in case they have to settle. Two, they’re simply just playing with you because they know you’ll satisfy their ego. Those are the only two reasons a dude would give you false hope

@Communitychoud 2 года назад

@@MB-xv7er oh I absolutely hate the one when you’re not they’re type but they still use you as they get a women who is. Selfish

@katarina9168 3 года назад

How do we tell a difference between manipulating and healthy break up that is worth fighting for with these symptoms?

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

Hi Katarina, I would recommend that you do the 5x5 exercise as it will help you assess the quality of the relationship that you are trying to get back with. To see if it is aligned with your personal values or not. We talk more about this topic inside the Ex Solution Program. :-)

@zw4065 4 года назад

So sad to update on a bad note from the last time I commented. We met up last week and had ice cream, he was always on the phone (texting) his rebound because she's so possessive and paranoid he shut his tracking app on his phone off. So kinda took away from the interaction but I told him I understood why, he said he didn't want her to try and "come find us" and "I wish we could of met on better circumstances." I just said it's fine, but he warmed up and basically said he wanted to figure out how to get away from her and told me to "hold on a little longer I'm trying to sort things out." when I said I'm gonna be there for him. He said it was nice to see me, and wanted me to tell him when I got back home so he knew I was safe. And.... since then I've been blocked on his phone. :/ I assume his rebound found out we've been talking on the phone almost daily and made him block me because I can't figure out any other reasoning for this sudden abrupt cut off. (He's even reassured me "If I don't answer my phone for you it's not because I don't want to talk to you") I can try to email or instant message him but I'm really freaking out and feel like I'm falling into damage control mode...? Suggestions Clay on what to do? I've been trying so hard to bring the best interactions out, I felt like I was in the friendzone and I felt like we were making progress.

@ClayAndrews 4 года назад

Hi ZW, I am not sure if you have checked our Ex Solution program course. If we are falling to Damage Control Mode, it is best to do Active No Contact and focus on honing the ARS and healing. If you have time, try to check our course as it can be truly helpful on your journey.

@jacobelrod6099 4 года назад

Just on here to vent. We texted and had heavy communication for 3 days straight. We meet up and spent a day together we had Soo much fun. We even slept together had a lot of time with are child then the next 2 days nothing. I'm so confused.

@i_nez9649 2 года назад

You really think just texting my ex addressing the situation is OK? All the other coaches say you have to not talk to them again for a bit like 1 or 2 weeks etc then be causal again. I dont know if that will work coz we were doing great and I really think my ex felt the pressure to start being fully together again even though he was suggesting it I don't think he was ready. Otherwise he wouldn't have started to ignore me

@splitzyentertainment7995 2 года назад

Or calls or forwarded your calls

@susu367 3 месяца назад

Heyyy Coach..my ex broke no contact and started texting me ,and asked to meet me ..We did it met and it went well but later on he became cold again .Not responding to texts for long periods of time and not initiating

@hayliedeshpande2392 4 года назад

My ex and I live together, however he’s constantly going back and forth between hot and cold. He’ll be nice for a few days but then he won’t be. He says he doesn’t want to be friends and wants me to just go out of the house but I’m treating this quarantine more seriously than he is. What do I do?

@ClayAndrews 4 года назад

Hi Haylie, I understand that the quarantine might limit our choices at this time. Will you be comfortable in respecting his personal space right now while living under the same roof? Since the situation nowadays is truly complicated, it is also best that you both would talk (disregarding the relationship concerns) regarding your intent to stay because of the quarantine regardless of your relationship issues.

@hayliedeshpande2392 4 года назад

Clay Andrews He did talk to me about it tonight but he seems to disregard the situation I’m in. It seems that now that we aren’t dating he no longer cares about my mental well being. I am willing to respect his space, however he’s always coming into mine and is making it difficult to keep limited contact.

@ClayAndrews 4 года назад

In what way that he no longer cares for your well-being? At times, when we break up with our ex some of the things that we enjoy while we are in the relationship are likewise removed from us. so we have to be emotionally ready and in acceptance that there will be some changes in the dynamics.

@hayliedeshpande2392 4 года назад

Clay Andrews My mother’s house is a very toxic environment which is one of the reasons we decided to move in together - he did not want to see me suffer anymore mentally bu being there and he’s seen first hand the toll it’s taken on me. But now that I am no longer dating him, it seems like he doesn’t care at all. I told him that and he said he does care, but someone who did wouldn’t keep saying that they have other people willing to pay rent money. It’s all he sees me as, money.

@hennylau8681 4 года назад

Hey clay, i was in the grey area before and because i was impatient i accused him of being bad and told him that he doesnt want me to move on (even tho he has stated that hes ok with me moving on and hes confused about relationship right now), now he ignores me at all, doesnt even read my msgs, even tho i have apologised. What should i do...

@ClayAndrews 4 года назад

Hi Henny, It seems like there are so many emotions that needed to be processed between the two of you. It is best to respect his wishes for space, for now, to sort himself out.

@hennylau8681 4 года назад

Clay Andrews hi clay, he did tell me "fine i wont text you again, good luck moving on" even tho he insisted we wouldnt be enemies, but he's doing the opposite thing right now. when do you think I should approach him again to apologise? I really wanna apologise and explain my reason. Thank you.

@katarina9168 3 года назад

What if it’s been over three weeks? Does me texting again trying to ease the tension still work or bother at this point? I feel like my situation is the 3rd one

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

Hi Katarina, If ever you would decide to initiate the contact with your ex, by using present moment awareness, what topic would you think would interest both of you?

@katarina9168 3 года назад

@@ClayAndrews music for example but I also feel like maybe he is manipulating me or taking me for granted

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

Don't let your BS machine take over your capability to connect.

@wiktoriawisniewska6644 4 года назад

Hi Clay! could you please help me out with my situation! so I met up with my ex after 4 months (i broke up with him) and we slept together and i thought he would've cared and put more effort into speaking to me but he hasn't, and i just don't know if to leave it for real this time or??

@wiktoriawisniewska6644 4 года назад

Justen Galacia no, i couldn't move on, he has slept with someone since. I worked on myself and bettered myself and he said he is very happy i'm not sad anymore as I have been for 2 years whilst i was with him through many insecurities as well as some things he has done.

@ClayAndrews 4 года назад

H victoria, if it is the first contact, we really cannot expect that level of interaction from our ex. It's because they have to observe the dynamics. That is why constant interaction should be there until we gain his confidence and trust back. If you have time, try to check the 5 stages of getting back together video that we have in our channel.

@benhartart9487 2 года назад

@@wiktoriawisniewska6644 since you broke up with him, usually the dumper does not feel the need to work on themselves, and if you met up again with them and had sex, he probably just wanted one for the road and now hes gone, I would say just move on :)

@brandonpero8742 3 года назад

What do you mean by "closing the loop"

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

It also means, closing the gap. We talk more about this in-depth inside the Ex Solution Program and Connect and Commit courses. :-)

@tonyrodriguez2690 Месяц назад

Hi clay my situation is a little complicated I live with my ex but I started dating a co worker i told her the truth about my ex and I that we are not together she understood that and we started dating it was going good I spent most my time with after work and meeting up with her for lunch and alone time ..i had to have surgery to my rotator cuff and it was hard to meet up with her because I couldn't drive but we texted each other every day and night ..so one day I texted her that me and my ex had. A little argument I shouldn't have text her that that was my biggest mistake after that she said we should take a break and see what life takes when I get better I understood what she wanted and I respected her wishes but it really hurt me to hear that because I loved her very much so I didn't text her for awhile till the. November to wish her a happy Thanksgiving she texted me back we text each other and we told each other Happy Valentine's Day and happy birthday now im back back to work and we see each other I text her but she doesn't text me back anymore I'm just letting her make her on decisions if she wants to be with me or not is this the right thing to do?

@brianstoops7186 4 года назад

I have a situation that not even the best relationship expert can help with my ex broke up with me moved out of state changed her number blocked me on all other Avenues of contact so I dont even know why im.watching this I can't get her back

@ClayAndrews 4 года назад

Hi Brian, I understand that it can be hard to know that we are blocked by our ex. But by any means you have her email or physical address? Those are some ways that you can still communicate with her in the future.

@brianstoops7186 4 года назад

@@ClayAndrews no she changed her me mail to and she went to go live with her sister in Tennessee I've never been to her sisters house

@sanchitabose7290 4 года назад

My ex is ignoring me..i have called him..but no response..i m missing him so muchh...i love him..he is not coming back..I'm heartbroken...I know that I broke his trust and made him do this..as I lied..but I'm really regretful.. really I do..

@mahjabinuddin9545 4 года назад

Hun is just best to ignore them me and my ex was in relationship got 2 years he was obsessed about me we both use to be with each other day and night but he stop trusting me and we went back and foreword all the time is been three moths he left but we all ways end up seeing each other and having sex but he loves me but he cheat behind my back but we all ways had connection and right now I don't care but todya he called me and tex me saying how I am and did I tex him just am excuse so he can talk yes I care for him but best is just leav them trust me they will contact you I now is hard but just be strong

@sanchitabose7290 4 года назад

Mahjabin Uddin thanks dear ..

@AMIR-yc1pc 4 года назад

Did you dump him or he dumped you ?

@hectorcastro9768 4 года назад

@@AMIR-yc1pc she is a very good lier

@psalm913 Год назад

My ex has made a black and white decision

@terencefletcher8928 2 года назад

Why does my Ex say she wants to be friends but ignores my texts

@ClayAndrews 2 года назад

Hi Terence, you might want to check our short video about that topic >> ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-FytcK9Y72lY.html

@MB-xv7er 2 года назад

When an ex says they “want to be friends” it’s their nice way of shutting you down because they’re too cowardly to tell the truth. They’re hoping you’ll accept that lie and just leave them alone. People should just be honest

@sexyshay17ify 4 года назад

What if he's in A Rebound Relationship And Want Respond Back?

@sexyshay17ify 4 года назад

@@nycgregofficial I'm Sorry to Hear That, I Hope Things Will Workout For You!

@secureconnection5245 4 года назад

My ex is in a rebound as well. He still keeps our pics together on his FB (which surprises me), but didn't respond to my text last week after 3 months since we spoke last time. We never officially broke up, kind of gradually stopped talking and seeing each other. When I texted him last week, made it sound neutral "How are you? Haven't heard from you in a while. Weathering the pandemic ok?" He never responded. Must be focused on the other person right now. I've been going out on dates too, so it's all good. Life goes on :-)

@sexyshay17ify 4 года назад

@@secureconnection5245 We Never Did Officially Breakup Either, He Just Stopped Talking And Texting Me 2 Months Ago, I'm Not Currently Dating Just Getting Myself Together, You Continue To Do Whatever Makes You Happy God Bless You!!

@secureconnection5245 4 года назад

@@sexyshay17ify Likewise

@sexyshay17ify 4 года назад

@@secureconnection5245 Thank You!