i’m disorganized sometimes i want a relationship and sometimes i’m very afraid of it. i often ghost potential partners and on top of that i always chase partners who are unavailable
Learning about attachment styles is of monumental importance for personal development. I cannot stress enough how much of a better understanding I have acquired about a close loved one's behaviour, as well as my own.
Seems like one perhaps, but it's not easy for people with Secure Attachment styles to find others with the same. Given that it's quite rare, people with Secure Attachment styles can be perceived with distrust or accused by others that they couldn't possibly be genuine. Which, coming from other attachment styles actually can make sense, since their reality has trouble recognizing other frames of being. Other times people with Secure Attachment styles get placed on a pedestal by others, a place they generally have no desire to be in. Just my 2 cents though
It's definitely intentional. Calm and soothing voices are less threatening and frightening to people and are less likely to trigger someone who may have been abused in their past.
Great question! Yes, we want to make sure our VO has calming voice. It's important to have someone be able to deliver important message access without triggering the audience. I hope you all appreciate the hard work behind creating the videos :). Also, if there is a specific animation style or topic you like to see more on this channel. Let us know!
Adults are described as having four attachment styles: 👇 Secure, Anxious-preoccupied, Dismissive-avoidant, and Fearful-avoidant. The secure attachment style in adults corresponds to the secure attachment style in children.
I definitely fall into the anxious/ambivalent attachment section. My parents were always very clear that they loved and supported me. But I think at least one of them has a mild form of bi-polar disorder. So I've spent most of my life constantly wondering what kind of mood they're in and how to shift my responses accordingly. It's an on-going guessing game. Even now that I'm an adult (and for financial reasons am living at home for a little bit) it feels like my dad is the hormonal teenage girl of the family. I'm starting to wonder if he has symptoms of early onset dementia. I'm tired of being the reasonable adult in our relationship. In my own romantic relationships I tend not to believe compliments or when they say that they love me. Maybe it would just take a long enough relationship. But two of my boyfriend have had emotional disorders or an unhealthy obsession, while the other one broke up with me.
i recently discovered attachment theory and i find it really helpful because it makes me understand myself better. i think for sure i’m anxious-attached. i tend to get really clingy and obsessive to people who give me attention and comfort. i start becoming very emotionally dependent on them and it affects me. recently, i’ve been trying to heal from this attachment style. It makes a lot of sense because i don’t recall my parents not fulfilling my needs but sometimes they weren’t there for me when i wanted them to be. i was a really anxious, quiet kid and i remember getting attached to pretty much anybody who seemed like they cared.
The last two attachment styles sound like my childhood. But I feel like I've had enough experience to exercise and strengthen secure attachments. It's still a work in progress :-)
im the anxious type, and i constantly apologize to the person i have a crush on or ask them if theyre angry with me then i feel bad that im being clingy, ughghghgh
@@maespace222 I am so glad I found this channel! The information they share has been incredibly helpful in breaking down the things that I've struggled with. I found that needed to accomplish self-love. It was and is a difficult thing to process. Please dont be so hard on yourself.
Okay, you thank us everyday but we really should be the ones to thank you. You've been very very active and you've never skipped a video without thanking us AND you have been covering ALL the topics we want to hear about. Thank you very much psych2go
You're the best! Thank you for coming back watching our videos. Don't forget to share our videos to people you know might benefit it. It will support our channel and give us ability to reinvest into more psychology and mental health videos to everyone 💕
@@berfin3176 hello! I started practising self love and i started choosing what's best for me, i pledged that my needs will come first for me, i started studying psychology to understand myself and my childhood better... I started journaling, eating right, i also started practising the LOA and i started meditating, i am on my path to healing, it's a process, i had a very emotionally traumatic childhood but as i turned 19 i realised my life can be in my control, so i took baby steps and here i am, happy and healthy 🥰✨ it's a process and anyone can do it! Just be patient. ❤️✨ Hope you have a good day!
I'm an avoidant attachment type. I used to feel very weird when people were nice and considerate, and only when I pushed them away they told me how distant I was to them. At least now that I know what's wrong with me I'm working on it to get better
I feel like I am a mix of anxious & disorganized avoidant-fearful attachment. What about a video to cover emotional dependency? I realized I relied on other people to make me happy, so I recently took a social media break to take care of myself and I found it helped a lot. I'm sure you guys know of more strategies that would be interesting to share with everyone else struggling with a similar situation.
hey, i know your comment was 2 years ago but i’m someone who struggles with emotional dependency. i’m very curious if you’ve improved or got rid of your emotional dependency and i’d appreciate if you would help me out a little
I have a secure attachment style. However, my last relationship made me so anxious! My las relationship was with an avoidant attachment, it was so frustrating because I would do EVERYTHING to make him comfortable . . When I get back on dating, I'm going to ask about their attachment style.
Watching this with tears coming down my face. I’m almost 23 and I’ve never had a healthy relationship with a man because it’s so hard. It’s so hard for me to be vulnerable and emotionally intimate. I always go for the wrong men because I my perception of love is so flawed. Im so scared to be a mom, I never wanna put my kids through this.
hey, its ok. we learn as we grow and you dont need to rush it. having a healthy relationship requires you to be in a decent state of mind too. you should try working on yourself and your mental health first before trying to get in a relationship. when we are not in a good state of mind, we tend to make bad choices and therefore we can end up with horrible partners.
I'm anxious a lot and it affects my everyday life in a negative way yet I don't talk to my mother about it because she says it's all in my head which makes me doubt others trust a lot
@@teddybear_chan2024 I don't think it's bad coz nobody knows who someone is over the internet, especially if you use an alternate name and not use your own picture, and you also need a place to vent without getting judged (most of the time).
@@zerro6961 yeah I guess I've tried talking about this to my mother once. And we'll got hit with the "it's all in your head you don't need help there's nothing for you to be deppresed"
@@teddybear_chan2024 bruh same. She's the main reason why I stopped showing my emotions. It hurts but it's better to hide them from my family. Thinking of definitely getting help if I could anyhow move out.
I think I’m in the secure section, although I do question if someone still likes me when they suddenly become cold, I’m just afraid, basically. I also question myself if I’m being a good friend, if I’m actually cool to be around with, when someone’s sad I worry about my comforting skills and if I’m just making it feel worse... Make do of that if you will (maybe it’s linked to my past since I have lost a friend soooo...) And I just wanted to thank this channel for being what it is, because I can get to open up and not feel weird about it! It gives me some good insights on friendships and overall is a great community!
i'm still not sure which attachment style I am but for 1 friend i know, i think he has an anxious-avoidant style so it makes me understand him more. thank you for the video
I think that, since I’ve gone to counseling and have admitted how my trauma has affected me, and possibly has steered me in the direction of being a narcissist, I have been able to mostly have a secure attachment style, and I do believe that it was because I realize that I will never be good enough for anyone and that is perfectly fine because I am 100% good enough for God. I cannot explain to you how amazing it feels to finally be good enough for someone and to never have to feel that you have to rely on anyone else for that feeling because you fully have it inside of you, obviously not all the time because everyone is still human, but my father was never told he was loved when he was a kid he was never good enough. He became a perfectionist, and he never went to counseling. He’s very avoidant and relies on himself and he’s a narcissist, so I always feel that I need to make him happy that it’s my fault that he is unhappy even though I have nothing to do with it that is completely not at my fault, I have realized this is definitely anxious, and disorganized, and avoidant attachment style. I also do come off, sometimes as clingy or too needy
@@ArsHaD-dg1gb Its probably because it was just unlisted, or because it was released early for patrons from patreon, or some other 'donating to creator' site.
@@Psych2go Hello! Keep being awesome y'all ^^ and as for my favourite, it's the videos where y'all talk about the signs of toxic parents because that really opened my eyes ^^"
I am everything except secure. A little bit of anxious/ambivalent where i can't easily trust people, a little bit of avoidant where I start to move away once I feel a growing intimacy, and disorganized because I never knew how to self-regulate. I am working hard on my healing. It's tough but I am willing to be patient.
So I have a disorganized attachment style. My dad struggled with addiction most of my childhood and I would see things that made me so scared of him. He was also a narcissist and my whole family suffered abuse whether physically or emotionally and mentally. If a fight ever occurred, my parents would both leave the house for a certain amount of time and I never knew when they were coming back. When my dad came back, the day after he would sit us all down and have a 2 hour lecture about how he is messed up and he is still our father. My mother would talk to me about him and would try to help me understand. Now an adult, in relationships i tend to dissociate in a fight and can never say the right things. I understand it all goes back to childhood but it’s something i wish i never had to go through.
I have an avoidant attachment style, but I am able to help others be emotionally vulnerable since I’m very empathetic. However, when it comes to myself I am unable to do the same. I’m an emotional person, but I don’t like to ever show anyone, which leads to people thinking I’m someone who is very emotionless or has a stoic personality. I’m so confused as to whether Im an avoidant or not 😪
When I heard the explanation of the disorganized one, I think (not know, that would be absurd, I am not experienced in psychology and overall stuff like that) that this is me I guess, plenty of times, I just don’t know how to react in situations, even with loved ones, by plenty I mean whenever something more serious or close to conflict arrives, I can argue sometimes and sometimes I just lock myself away..
I'm an anxious preoccupied type and my partner is an avoidant type... It's a real dumpster fire. When he pulls away I feel hurt and want to be closer to him but he just wants to be left alone. Giving him space when I'm feeling unloved is the most difficult thing! But I know that if I crowd him he'll just become agitated and sad. Then he might actually stop loving me for real! I'm really trying to tend to my feelings on my own but my heart beat increases just thinking about having to give him space! Aaaaah why does it have to be painful? I hate it!
I think I'm disorganised avoident-fearful attachment. It was pretty accurate when describing the inability to understand the parents. As a kid my dad was distant one minute and caring the next and then my parents would argue and then makeup which often left me confused. I thought they didn't love each other and then one year they were like "yeh we actually love each other" it was wierd because I didn't believe it. I definatly have a problem keeping consistent relationships I've had 3 maybe even 4 groups of friends that have come and gone and I'm only 23 lol
I’m secure attachment but I had a mother that was like the second and third type... my hurt from my family made me want to love people even more so they never feel that way and it taught me self love. ❤️
I developed disorganized attachment from being almost completely unable to communicate my needs due to autism and having parents who couldn’t understand me or really help me. I never knew what I wanted anyways, besides healthy relationships, which were like… impossible.
I have reactive attachment disorder. I thought I had it under control but it’s worse again and it’s driving me nuts and sending me into a downward spiral 😊
Anxious/ambivalent here... I was close to tears when I heard explanaton of my type, and nowdays, almost 28 years old, this is still ruining my relationships with people...
I have anxious/ambivalent attachment (I actually know this so I didn’t just completely diagnose myself...I do that a lot)😅 The reason I know is because I’ll be talking to my partner and they’ll be texting their friend and I’ll freak out. I’ll start to think they don’t love me so they have to reassure me, which I don’t enjoy since I don’t want them feeling to pressured even though they it’s not pressuring them.😂I’m over thinking just typing this. I also have a problem with if they want space I start to over think and start believing they just don’t want to be around me (I start to feel insecure).
@@userm180 oh I’m doing much better. I do sometimes still think that but my partner is really understanding and helps me. It also helps that I live with my partner. Thank you for asking😊
Hi. Thanks for this video. Some people keep saying that this channel is a joke but they don't know what "feelings, mental healt and other human things" means-_- Thank you again♡
Hi I was wondering if you could a video to help people speak out to others. As I'm depressed but I'm terrified to tell my mum. So that video would be useful to many. Especially younger people like me.
It's absolutely weird that I totally have the avoidant style, yet neither my parents nor I recall what could be the reason behind it, as I had everything I needed in my childhood...
Honestly I think I'm like a mix of secure and avoidant attachment style. I tend to be there for others but then so many times later I end up disconnecting with everyone
Thank you so much for the videos you post. Recently subscribed. It's encouraging me to seek help for trauma and just overall work on myself. Your voice is soothing as well. Thank you ❤ I hope you're well!
@@Psych2go I'm catching up your videos so there might be something I'm interested in hearing more in depth and you've already made a video about it. I'm very interested in different types of "romantic" relationships. Like, monogamy, polygamy, polyamorous, open. I've found that I don't fit the societal norm of romantic partner wants and needs. Also interested in: -How our childhood affects adulthood -Retraining our brain and how long it takes -Core things people can do to help with mental instability, like simple tasks like eating and moving. Or things that impact our mental health in a negative way that we may not be aware of. -Affects of long term media and digital consumption
Thank you for your feedback! Definitely will pass your comment down to the team. ☺️ if there is a specific animation style you like the most. Let us know in any comments :)
You are so welcome. It's important to be aware and seek professional help when needed to be. Did you watch the bottling up emotion video on our channel?
I have anxious/ambivalent attachment (Time skip 1:51) Growing up I was a cry baby, people teased me for being a cry baby :/ when I turned 8 years old I stopped crying, I become more distance and Not caring towards some people, I still even now can’t understand why people cry for some things. Then I hurt people I don’t want to harm people my anger and no self control forces me to do it. I don’t want to be left behide, I have been left behide in the past so I try to be Nice as possible but can’t manage it..I wonder if people hate me because of what I do.
What if inside you are anxious or ambivalent cause you think people would like all your emotions or don’t trust that people like you for you or at all and have poor self esteem but at secure because you want to seem like you aren’t anxious and stressed but instead keep up a secure front and work on comforting other but certainly don’t feel secure in ur self?? What does that mean?
great video like always ☺️ Also can you maybe make a video about being socially awkward or something that has to do with it being hard to make friends because right now I am really lonely I’ve also been having really crazy thoughts lately that are a bit personal so I won’t say them. I want friends but I hate socializing and I feel like if I make friends the group would get tired of me since I don’t talk much since I’m not so close to them. I don’t want to be ignored in the group also sometimes I insult myself in my head like saying I’m ugly and that nobody would ever want to be my friend and I laugh at my own insult I don’t know what’s going on with me I want help but I don’t know who to talk to I talk to my mom but she doesn’t understand me and also ignores me Sorry if this didn’t make sense
