When friends leave the faith. 

“How burdensome it must be for someone to try to live a life that is impossible to live without the Holy Spirit.” That’s a word compassion and very touching.

"Your lifestyle should convict people more of sin than your words." Amen

“We don’t have to be more offensive,because the Gospel is offensive enough” 🔥🎯

Jackie is right. I grew up in a Christian household. Although I believed God growing up, when I was faced with a major challenge, I walked away from God, thinking I will do things my way. Four years ago, the life I chose overwhelmed me and I felt if I stayed there, I will die. I crued out to God and He saved me. Since then, you can never tell me anything about God not being trustworthy. He is the rock of my life, that decision changed my life completely.

“You have a lot of saints who grew up in the church and just believed what was taught without processing!” YES YES YES!!!

I felt it when Preston said to have compassion for people who leave. I had seasons in my life where I was on the brink of leaving because Christianity was painful to me. My legalism meant that even though everyone knew me as a "fruitful" Christian, I was constantly afraid of God's wrath. I also struggled with incredible doubt because I'm naturally cynical. Thinking about it reminds me that it's all by grace man. Only Jesus keeps me standing and leads me to see more sweetness in Him every day.

This was so good and encouraging! My husband walked away from the faith almost 3 years ago after public declaration of his faith in Jesus. Imagine how hard it is to get up Sunday morning and go to church for the past 3 years with your kids and their father doesn’t go. And it is a heart issue…it’s not about the excuses I’ve heard that “the Bible was written by a white man” or “Jesus isn’t real” or “blacks were brainwashed to believe these lies.” The truth is his mom died when he was 5 and if God is so good and who He says He is, why did He let that happen.” It is a heart issue. I will continue to pray that God is able to heal his heart and finish what He started.

This was encouraging as a person currently experiencing some type of shift in my faith. I'm also unclear why I feel this way, but this message convicted me; pray for me. Edit: I appreciate you all for covering me in prayer and your encouragement.

No one talks about what comes after deconstruction, it’s reconstruction and that’s a much harder process than people think.

My pastor says, “I’ve found God isn’t intimidated by our hard questions.” They encourage the questions because after we have the answers, it stretches us more.

“If you represent truth, truth is offensive.” 💯

I LOVE Preston’s perspective on not giving biblical language to someone who doesn’t believe the Bible. As someone who struggles with faith and validity of the Bible, I can say I get a lot further in conversations about Christianity when it’s not so saturated with Bible scriptures

They hit it on the nail once again. I fell away because I felt trapped in my Christian life. I wanted to experience the world because not only were my peers doing it, but they were having fun while doing it. I wanted to party, go to clubs, drink, smoke, have sex, I wanted to be like the worldly kids because on the outside they were living the life and it felt like I wasn’t. It’s how the enemy got me: I got tempted with a “good time”. When I began to live the life, now looking back I realized how depressing it really was. Your body slows down, your brain processes a lot slower, you’re more slurred, exhausted, overall your body is wiped out. I never slacked in school, but I slacked everywhere else. My people pleasing trait worsened, and my multiple personalities couldn’t keep up anymore. I was tired of everything not working out for the better. This was a 6-7 year life I lived. When I came back to God, my life did a complete 360. I felt normal again. I can’t even look at liquor the same, and smoking was a HARD pass. I still struggled with lust, but with the Lord’s help and guidance I kept getting back up. I refused to turn my back on Jesus again, not after he pulled me out of the rabbit hole I dug for myself. And with the help of my parents and siblings who kept their doors opened for my like Preston suggested: never bashing or attacking, always welcoming, it made me realize even more the mistakes I was making by following the world. Their never ending love for me regardless of my sins, and their ability to forgive me made me realize that I wasn’t forever condemned in God’s eyes. He was still waiting for me to come back into his arms. All I had to do was walk into them.

I have walked away not only once but twice not because I wasn’t saved, but because I didn’t truly believe God was my help during those dark times in my life. I wanted vengeance and I took matters in my own hands because the very things I had been praying and believing God for, did not come to pass! I regret leaving Him!! I’m blessed to have been a part of His fold, and like the prodigal son, once I came to the end of myself; I returned home to Daddy!! I’m so thankful and I’m remaining no matter what, who, where, when, why or how!! God loves me!!

I am someone who walked away from the faith, and about two years ago slowly started to return. I will say that before I left the church/ faith that I was struggling with a few things mentally in regards to Christianity. But even when I started to pull back from serving or attending services, no one ever asked why or even checked on me. I feel like we have to recognize signs of people pulling away and be there for them before they decide to leave.

Facts Jackie!!! You really have to wash the dishes before using the dishwasher if the dishes are to be cleaned thoroughly. Dishwashers high key a scam

Yesss!!! “May the Holy Spirit empower you to believe that God is everything HE says about himself” that is a word!

"Your lifestyle should convict people way more than your words do." YES.

“Grew up in Christian context”. That’s 🔥. I say that just because there’s close proximity to Truth doesn’t mean there is an embracing of the Truth. There is a difference.

This is something I needed to hear. I'm here crying. The exhaustion is a true word. I have decided to follow Jesus, no turning back x

Such a good discussion - I went through a period of deconstruction in my 20s spurred by a period of pain and came to a point where I realized if I continued down the road of resistance, I was going to have to walk away from faith entirely. And I realized I didn't want that. So I chose to stop resisting and begin submitting to the answers that I didn't like. And God has brought me to a place where I am strong in faith and no longer see God's truth as threatening. I am greatly pained by how my younger sister has gone through a period of deconstruction with the opposite outcome - walking away from the faith, believing God is not good or worth following, etc. I see the suppression of the truth and idolatry and can only pray for her.

Definitely agree with Jackie on deconstruction. I deconstructed during lockdown and it was a work God was doing… taking me from taught religion to true religion. I’ve been learning to give God my heart and not my works. Thank you for this beautifully faithful, transparent and necessary conversation.

The way that y’all are willing to have the most transparent conversations on this podcast for the edification of the body of Christ and the glory of God will never cease to impact me. Absolutely beautiful testimony. God’s goodness is so next level

God is not afraid of our questions!!!! This is SOOOOOOO good & I needed it right now!!!!

I left the church community and chose to live in sin for 6 years, behind all my excuses of racism in the Church, church hurt, confusion with multiple denominations and theologies, and difficulty find a wife was a hidden heart that had been deceived that my old lifestyle was better. I wanted to go back into the world and sleep around again. I needed Christians to aggressively pursue me and a deeply appreciated when they did. I ran from conviction as long as I could, until God drug me back home.

I left the church for 15 years until God arrested me in my bedroom almost 2 years ago to come back to HIM. I’ve felt the freedom now to serve Jesus more than ever before because the church is no longer my priority because I learned it’s His. My priority has changed to serve him and do what he tells me. My obedience to him has freed me to serve any and everything else through the Holy Spirit and not by ambition. Ambition will cause you to be hurt in the church. Turn your ambition into obedience to God and not to please the church. Just obey God. So I’m free to be me because I live for him and him only.

I've also walked away from the faith 2 years ago, the pain that I felt whilst outside God's presence was like no other. Thank God Jesus went after me as that 1 lost sheep

I witnessed my dearest friend, worship leader, fellow church planter renounce the faith and it was the hardest thing to witness. I tried to love them anyway and the hardest part is them not wanting anything to do with us, although we did nothing wrong. The angst is not knowing what’s happening in their soul. I’m sad for that. Loosing contact is painful

Preston is an honest orator. He speaks from the heart -where the word truly resides.

My son has walked away from God and I know it’s some disappointment when God did not hear his cry and answer his prayer. It’s so hard to see him pushing back when he used to love sharing his faith with others. 💔 - this tonight was so encouraging. Thank you for encouraging Gods people to realize the pain and suffering they are going through and to love and stay in touch with those that leave when possible.

One of the things that I’m realizing is being a “Christian” is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. A lot of people who say they are “Christian” live their lives however they want and put a stamp of religion on it. I’ve met so many people who call themselves “Christian” yet they only do and follow what they are comfortable with. Whatever is not convenient for them-they ignore and refuse to be challenged. No one can tell them that they are doing anything wrong because in their minds, they are in a place of comfort and are doing what works for them. All the while, they walk around calling themselves “Christian’s” when their lifestyles and behaviors don’t measure up to such a title. I have chosen to believe in God-despite my questions, despite the fact that not everything makes sense to me-I still choose to believe. I wanted to be someone who is loving and kind to everyone and who treats people well. That is more important to me than the title of a “Christian”-mostly because I’ve seen so many of these people who are unkind or who will try and drag you down into their sin and yet I’ve met many non believers who are kind, well mannered, good people-and are not religious. So I learned to take things with a grain of salt-reject all forms of religion and focus on being a good person who is good to others and live my truth.

God gives us strength to endure, it’s because of him I have endured. I’m a single mother with two beautiful autistic children. My husband passed away years ago. I lost my job over declining the vaccine. I declined due to my pre existing health conditions lupus and heart disease. I’ve been struggling to provide for myself and my children since losing my job from Forsyth hospital. But God has given me strength. Strength to keep obeying and serving even when I feel tired and overwhelmed and like I can’t go on. Every month is a battle to not end up homeless on the streets with my two children. But I have faith God will provide. Even as I’m mocked and harassed by others for my circumstances and choice. I will keep Faith. Please pray for me and my boys. God hears all prayers.

Loading my dishwasher while listening 😂 I really enjoy your discussions, such a blessing 😊

Preston is such an amazing leader. It gives me hope for our men of faith. It is such a great example of a great husband and great leader. I hope he comes and preaches at our Church one day.

This is true "we want to be independent of everything... all boundaries... all rules... all constraints" this is so true and you are speaking Jackie...also when you said "we want to be free in the way God is"...it is impossible because our bounds will either be of good or evil. This could be a great teaching...Father help us all

So many good points here. I went through deconstruction of My faith when I turned 30 I believe. I totally tore everything I believed and knew down/away. Praise be to God that He built my faith back up and I returned to the faith.

Y'all betta TEACH! This is Hallelujah stuff right here! Minister Preston "We try to convict people of their sin who walk away from the Faith with because our life ain't gone do it"

Once I truly submitted to Christ, I found freedom in dying to myself and allowing God to lead.... It's less burdensome to me ❤

Such a relevant convo. I often think of our struggles in the faith as like being a young child... you didn't always understand what/why your parents did what they did... "why do they have to go to work?" or "why didn't they let me have (blank) when I asked?"... but once you became an adult, things made more sense... similarly, there are certain things about The Lord that we may never understand in this life (like "grown-folks business" 🙂)... the complete understanding we seek may only come when we see Him face to face in the next life... until then, we must learn (like Jacob) how to "wrestle with God and with men, and prevail" (Genesis 32:28). Praise The Lord for His sustaining grace through our struggles... What a great day it will be when we see Him face to face! 🙌

That was the best 30 min workout of my life! Biblical and spiritual content brings life

“Sometimes we try to convict people who walk away because we know our life ain’t gone do it.” SHEEEESSSSHHHHH

I remember one time I was evangelizing with my friends and they had an encounter with a women who identified herself as a lesbian, and I could sence that when she saw us she went into this defensive posture, and I really felt that the importance wasn’t me saying all the things that she had most probably already heard from other believers but just asking how are you doing ? And she just changed, became so friendly. And we just had a good respectfull conversation. This is why living with the spirit is helpfull, because evangelizing shouldn’t be just giving hand outs but also having conversations and showing others that we are also humans just like them and care of how they are doing. And just would like to have a friendly conversation.

Jackie had me screaming at her at the screen with that last tidbit about God's people turning back to strengthen the Saints when one walks away...I shouted at her like she shot a three at the half court mark! That was a great scripture reference! Very insightful. I really appreciate that God has allowed me to know about her in my lifetime 🙏🏾

Love seeing people bond in the comments over their experiences 😭😭 Lovely video! Thanks guys for your honesty.

I love all of this. The parable - the soil is SO important and unfortunately when we come into His truth, our soil is not tiled, still has weeds (old seeds/unrighteous fruit) that need to be removed - our soil is not ready to produce righteous fruit. This is why many of the "seeds" fall to the wayside. Constantly having that fire to seek Him and to not lean on your own understanding is vital.

Please keep me and my broyher lifted in prayer. Speaking only for myself. I never expected to be where I am currently with my belief. I'm not deconstructing to disprove what I believe, but to unlearn (what i believe to be) bad theology. And I've ran into some kind of identity crisis. My heart is grieved and I'm trying to pinpoint why.

As someone that is not a believer anymore, I appreciate people like Jackie and Preston for their graceful spirit. I do feel like some of it was one-sided, but I can understand why it was because I was once there. Deconstructing is NOT easy when your identity was only found in God. When leaving the faith you have to find who you are as a person aside from belief. While I don’t plan to come back to the faith, I do appreciate people that truly seek to UNDERSTAND why people leave without pressuring us to come back (even though that might be your duty because god said so). Like a good poet once said… there is hope and love on the other side 🥰

From watching this video it made me realize. 1) I’ve been evangelizing wrong, though the words were true at that moment they shouldn’t have been said bc people need to see the love of God bc believers and unbelievers know about Gods wrath and misconceptions about His righteousness that doesn’t make sense to us sometimes. 2) w/ the verses Jackie read I see myself in that and I see the demonic attack as well. To anyone reading I say pray for me, in summary, a lot has occurred, I feel like God doesn’t want me to say anything now but I’m starting not to care bc I don’t desire to keeping living like this. I should want to be close to Jesus but I’m like “There’s Jesus” as I keep walking.

This is such a needed conversation. I have actually deconstructed my faith before. It was unhealthy, honestly. I thank God for those moments, I am a better Believer and now I truly feel as if I know Christ. I built a solid relationship with God after all that and vowed to never leave Him again. Seeing God for yourself and experiencing life with Him is AMAZING!

“Maybe the device to use is to say ‘How are you today?’ to love on and care for their person!” THIS WAS IT!!!

These are the kinds of discussions that should happen amongst fellow followers of CHRIST without condemnation, shame, debating and divisiveness. Honest and open and open to listen to understand and be open to healthy correction. 🙏

Great Couple! Awesome Discussion… I love how you two make a very complex situation easy to digest. I love while you’re never judgmental but you STAND FIRM IN THE TRUTH. Keep doing the work. Blessings Multiplied!

I'm sad and happy. I'm sad that there isn't across the board more nuanced faithful conversation on these topics across all bodies of believers. I'm happy you all are having this conversation. God strengthen everyone trying to ride it out for him.

This space is so chill - there is a beautiful spirit/presence about this place! May God bless your ministry! 🙂

These are 2 of the most eloquent people I’ve ever come across!

I love this!!! and I love how you guys have allowed the Holy Spirit to be manifested in your lives. It is so evident that God, and his word comes first. The Perry family, will always be in my prayers. 📖🙏🏽❤️

OOOOF this is good. Also, I love the way you speak to each other with grace and respect. Thank you for showing Jesus in your marriage! Bless you guys. 🤍☺️

THIS WHOLE THIIING. This convo is so necessary, only the tip of the iceberg. The harvest is plenty, the workers are few. We have to do our best anyhow because folks are out here just lost. 🙏🏽

You guys handle every topic with such care. I had a close family member walk away from Christ and I was not sure how to handle it. I have tried everything but taking a step back and being a safe place like you mentioned. Very helpful!!

Now that will preach all by itself🙌🏾🙌🏾.... “our lifestyle should convict far more than what we speak...[however] we try and convict with our words because “we know our lifestyle is not going to do it”!!!!🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 Hallelujah!! Glory to God!!

This is so good and it has helped me take some things to the Lord...I feel I have burned some bridges with those who are self-professed Christians but are not living it. I do believe the Lord told me to share some things with them but I may have gone overboard with some, OR they were just offended OR a little of both... praying for that clarity. Thanks Perry’s! Praying much for your strength and fortitude in the Faith! 🙏🏽🙏🏽✝️

Wow, thank you for this great message. I am living this situation right now and because of the sadness of my heart, the Holy Spirit brought me to this scripture: Lord will fight for you; you must be quiet (Exodus 14:14). We need to pray and trust God for our friends. We are call to hope, not fear! Thank you again so much!

Something so good, honest, wise, about these videos. Hungry for these conversations.

When I think about our ancestors I cannot fathom either! However I wonder how many actually believed in God and stayed faithful vs how many accepted there new reality and lived through it day to day!?! When we look at Nat Turner and Harriet Tubman they declared that they actually heard from God therefore revolted against the system leading towards freedom for all! So could be because those didn’t hear from God resulted in them remaining bound?

The more you hear about God , the more you love him . The more you hear about God while in the darkness the more you want to run from him. WOAH !!

I walked away from the building aka “church”, and my relationship with God has deepened and grown so much that I’m grateful for leaving. This makes sense to those who share my walk. I will forever be one who follows The Messiah. Peace and Blessings!

Thank Y’all this was dope my childhood sweetheart is now into African spiritualism parents were pastors he’s a musician I’m a worshipper what looks like a match made in Heaven now is complicated because I love him the same 🙏🏾Have no choice but to TRUST God with the process NEEDED this encouragement

"We don't have to be more offensive, because the Gospel is offensive enough" - wonderfully said!

Preston has an important point. Meeting people where they are is vital for building relationship. It helps them and you.

This was really good and offered an explanation for an experience I'm currently living out with someone I considered to be my BEST friend. We have not spoken to each other since Feb 2022. I knew she was a luke warm Christian in our youth. We're both in our mid thirties now. However, since she'd become well traveled and seen other parts of the world and their culture, she's found issues with Christianity, the US, the average black person, etc...Now she's all about the metaphysical and "source", and "spirit" (not to be confused with the Holy Spirit). Before our break she started to be real disrespectful toward the faith. However, I'd be lying if I didn't say I miss her. I pray for her, and myself to heal from this new feeling of abandonment. Thank you guys for covering this topic.

It’s impossible to be intelligent and spiritually minded at the exact same time. After all, we, Christians, have seen the light and those who believe differently than us ~ haven’t. Our selfish “ego” blindly drives us to passionately persuade others who not believe differently than us to think, reason and believe just as we do. God is Love, not our Ego!

This was everything Perry's. Thank you, I experienced this exact thing in a 20 year friendship, it's hard being the open door when the person who left was also a manipulative advocate. Help me Holy Ghost

I’ll definitely be watching and rewatching this episode! Too many gems to grabs all at once!!! 💎💎 As always, thank y’all so much for the solid content. ☺️

I will never forget when our pastors brother was preaching and laying hands. He laid my mom flat out and healed her shoulder, I saw a family friend speak in tongues like never before, and I even felt light on my feet and I knew that the spirit was literally flowing over my body. I honestly think the reason I also didn’t fall out is because I was half focused on if I was good enough for God to love. It was an experience that solidifies how close God is.

“I’m speaking to the people who are around those who are deconstruction. We can’t tell them how to deconstruct.” This was SO GOOD!! “I don’t have control over how they deconstruct!”

This was a good one. Definitely answered my questions on how to interact with friends and family who walk away from the faith.

I'm midway thru but I'm grateful for this. As a person who has a friend who is a Black Hebrews Israelite and claims that someone like me, with my skin tone, is not a Child of God and basically evil. It hurts. And their presence is very large, all over the world. It makes me question so much. I know I'm a Child of God yet I'm told I'm not... :(

My favourite couple, hands down. Thanks for this, it was much needed, since becoming a Christian I’ve seen many people leave and no matter how often I see it it still hurts as if it was the first time I’ve experienced it. But it comes down to loving people where they are at like Christ would

Literally one of the BEST discussions I’ve seen from the Perry’s. Thank you for addressing such an important topic that touches us all or will touch us at some point. Well done, y’all.

thank you so much for bringing out that when a friend falls away from the truth, they often fall away from you as a friend as well out of guilt or shame. my best friend fell away from Christ and i was heartbroken and confused when she distanced herself from me as well. i understand now that maybe she wanted to break away from everything Christ-related, even me as a Christian friend. it hurts but i will continue praying that God can use me in her life again one day to bring Him glory.

Great convo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I didn't have a 100% deconstruction but I definitely had questions and stopped going to church for a couple years and looked into other ways to manage my stress while knowing in the back of my mind that God was real, I just didn't believe he was enough. HE CALLED ME BACK THOUGH! He sure did, praise God. You just never know what season someone could be in. Love & Truth.

Great conversation Perry's....thank you.

Thank you and God bless you for this conversation…amazing.

Man this was needed. Please keep it coming.

Love this video so much! This wisdom is so necessary. I love how through your banter you took us through “how to process a situation like this”

This was so rich, educational, and practical ! Thank you so much for this episode !! Such a blessing ✨🙏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

This was a really good and necessary conversation. Very great episode.

Amén! The encouragement at the end was me. Thank you Lord ❤️

I REALLY enjoy the conversations you allow us to listen in on. I agree with so much if what was said and somethings, not realizing I agree with alot of things yall discuss.

So much wisdom!🔥Too many gems to grabs all at once!! I am definitely watching this again❤

This was so needed, and so encouraging. Thank you.

"Not oppressive but letting something go for something better." Such a simple truth. Freeing truth.

"You will always be bound or constrained by something!"

That’s powerful Preston “If they belong to the Lord, the Lord is going to draw them back to Himself.”

Jackie, those last two minutes just blesses me so much when you mentioned Peter! THANK YOU!

This was a great discussion and I appreciate both of you for sharing on this subject. Thank you for what you do for the kingdom

I am always so blessed by your discussions. You were constantly coming unto my feed on youtube because I watch a lot of Priscilla Shirer. Until one day I decided to listen one of your videos that you both did spoken word together. So here I am subscribed and praying God blesses you both, your family and ministry. Love from Lagos, Nigeria

🧡🙏🏼😇 praise God for His wisdom in this chat! Thanks y'all, blessings!

Always grateful for you two. Continue to excel in your purpose, it has helped me more than you both will ever know. ❤️

Bout to watch this over and over and over! Cause those last two minutes when Jackie is talking bout Peter touched my soullllllllllll