BeautySyndromeBaby tbh Freddie and Jeanie went in together planning not to have children, so in reality he wasted his own life. But we don’t know what goes on behind closed doors so we both have no idea of the circumstances
I hear this segment and I’m crying my eyes out. I miss my mom and talking to her. I miss hearing her advice and giving me words of affirmation and assuring me that things will get better. Even if your mom gets on your nerves, cherish her. You never know when’s the last time you’ll hear her voice.
So very true. My mom was the best. I miss her a lot, but the good thing is that she knew I loved and respected her while she was alive. Don't take them for granted..they are not perfect, but neither are you and in many cases they've given you the best while taking the left overs.
Grisel Blanco , I did too! My mother passed over 3 yrs ago & we were really close. She was one who didn't hold anything back. I know most people consider that blunt but I love people like that b/c I'd rather someone be upfront with me than be fake. My mom kept it real & I truly miss her & her advice. 😢
I understand why people say that moms know best. But in reality, they're still human. No one is right, all the time. Moms can still be prejudice, irrational, insecure, overprotective, unreasonable, etc. Generally speaking, it is good to consider their perspective. But people shouldn't take their opinions as fact.
You are so right, my parents till now are rejecting my husband because he is from a country they don’t like. They didn’t even give him a chance to introduce himself to them. Till now they haven’t met him.
Definitely. I feel like they talked a lot about the emotional factor here, but what if your mama don't like him bc he's a different race, religion, his personal beliefs, his background, his job, etc. Maybe straight up she just doesn't think he's cute and she doesn't want ugly grand babies? 😂😂😂
YOUR absolutely right. My mom didn't like my husband when we was dating because she was jealous that someone else was taking up my time and it wasn't her she didn't like him still after we married UNTIL 4 years later after all of a sudden I needed a lung transplant and he did EVERYTHING and stood by my side every night in the hospital for 3 months and she saw just what a man he was. If I listened to her inn the beginning I would have missed out for no reason at all. So yes its definitely a case by case decision
Usually mothers have legit reasons why they don’t like your partner. I mean my mum is really smart and can smell a rat a mile off, so if she could sense something she would say.
Some parents are also abusive and controlling/narcissistic. Parents are just people too and have insecurities and their own intentions and sometimes humans are selfish.
Naomi P a lot of what she was saying i had a feeling about already. i used to feel like she would put up a front about how happy she actually was in the relationship. Especially when she would talk about wanting marriage but still in a 5+ year relationship not heading towards it. He probably only proposed because of how they would talk about him on the show.
i don't remember exactly since its been a couple of seasons. i believe that they (i think mostly tamar) was asking adrienne about her relationship with lenny in terms of how long they were together and why he hadn't proposed to her about being together for 5 years.
Roxana Romero yes . On tia’s yt she talks about her favorite memory with her father is her father daughter dance. And she wish he was still here :( they also posted on Instagram. It’s been awhile now
i understand mothers worry, i am a mother myself. However, my mother didnt approve of my husband at first when I introduced him because of cultural differences. So much that she didnt even show up at my wedding. But I knew my husband was the right one and now hes her favourite son in law...So I dont necessarily think mothers always know best, based on my experience.
Same here. My parents did not care for my first boyfriend. I was 21, he 22 and they were like don’t put your eggs in one basket, there are plenty more guys out there. My mom especially, “ I don’t like his hair, his sense of style, he only cares about one thing etc. “ Well 7 years later, that first boyfriend is now my husband, a teacher and currently works with my mother, who is also a teacher. And my parents LOVE him now!!! Sometimes you just got to push through what your parents believe if your belief is greater than theirs. Also patience is a wonderful tool in this situation !!!!!!
You will live with him not your mum. I believe it isnt their place at all. I would never let a love go for my mum. I didnt choose my dad either, so let me live.
I really like this, especially what Adrienne said. But sometimes, Mom doesn't know best, because they are not there all the time. A mom's gift of discernment is not always fool proof because people are complex and can change for the better. My sister married a guy with a bad past, and my mom hated the situation so much that a wall came between them and they didn't talk for a long time. After my sister's 8th wedding anniversary and second child, my mother realized the guy is changed and said sorry.
I understand what a lot of you guys are saying but from my experience, if my grandmother doesn't like someone, run for the hills. That woman is NEVER wrong about people.
When you’re grown they can’t dictate your life anymore. Sometimes they know you’re not in a good situation but, you have to know that for yourself. Not just because your mom says so.
Yes moms could feel pain that you are going through. My mom until now, still hate my first ex bf. It was 12 years ago but still, she didn't forget the hell I've been through because of that person. Their opinions are very important but it is still your decision at the end. If they truly love you, they will respect your decision and will learn to accept it.
My mama might not like my man, but my man loves eating what my mama made, if you get what I'm saying 😏😏 PS I love #HoeChronicles and I read your comments religiously
What Adrienne says is so true!! The wrong person can def make you feel like you’re cold and distant when all you actually want is true love and affection! If Israel really brings out the best in her than all the more blessings to them
My uncle said in front of me and my mom "your momma don't like your boyfriend, but hes a good boy. I can tell he loves you and treats you right. Your mom is probably judging him Until he proves her wrong. But either way, it don't matter. At the end of the day, you're having sex with him or doing whatever with him. Never decide to be with someone based on someone's judgement. You have to learn. You have to have your own heart break. You have to experience this for your future." Needless to say, me and my boyfriend are going to make 4 years in June ! And my mom let him moved in (we sleep in separate bedrooms) because he has no one in this city. His family left to another state.
Ain't no way.! I'm assuming your about 18 and he's about 19/20 bc there's no way in the world a grown man would be staying in my house.... And with that being said I'm also assuming they think/know y'all having sex and I know parents can't control every thing we do but she's basically saying get my daughter pregnant I don't care...
chelsea Moore never really heard her say that but I would ask her just in case that's in her priorities. Like I said, to each their own. Don't assume stuff about my mom, you don't know her, me or my boyfriend. Just because you have different perspectives or a different opinion, you don't have to come off rude. I think it's more of a respect relationship. Saying "he can stay but he has to pay rent. He can eat but he has to help out bringing up groceries." I respect my mom. You can think whatever you want about me. But don't talk about my mother or assume what she wants just like you wouldn't want anyone to talk about yours
It makes me cry when Adrienne talked about her mom. I’m scared when my daughter gets older. This also made me think of my mom. When you with someone with a negative energy it changes you and you become that energy. I really believe that mother knows best.
Moms know best BUT mine is too harsh/expects people to be perfect and is very judgmental, projects her insecurities so I’m very skeptical with what her judgements are....
K de la Cruz lol is a Virgo? 🙂 or maybe she has that sign in her chart somewhere ... look up the actual number day she was born, that will tell you a lot
My family hated my first boyfriend who I was with for 3 1/2 years and engaged to. I stayed with him almost just to try to prove them wrong. They were so right about him, but I still feel like I had to go through that relationship anyway.
brittany wallace Exactly! I had to learn that the hard way. Not only did my family not like my boyfriend, but none of my friends did either. We were together my junior and senior year of high school. By the time graduation came, I literally had no friends. It was so sad and pathetic. He always made me feel like everyone was jealous of us, and it was us against the world. I wish I hadn't of been so naive. If I could go back in time, I would rather have my friends than him. However, being in that relationship is what led me to my wonderful husband today, who everyone loves, so I guess it was all meant to be.
Jenny Eddins there's a difference between one person not liking your significant other because they're over protective and everybody not liking your significant other if you're in Tire family and all your friends didn't like him you were blind and that's on you but my mom literally doesn't like anybody I date and quite frankly I don't like anyone she dates so I don't want nor ask for her advice and when she gives it without me asking I ignore it... mom knows best is not always true
Akbbba 1 our friends point of things & we don’t listen. Y’all know damn well y’all not listening EVERY SINGLE THINGS your mother tells you when it comes to these men. Let’s be real lol
My sibling brought a new guy to meet the family and he was read severely by my mom... the worst. I'm an aura individual and sensed a few things. Long story short, sibling asked my thoughts. I stated he wasn't for her, and we had a fallen out. A few years later, she revealed the relationship is over and court. I know folks don't consider family, but I do because they see and sense things when I'm blind.
asma al how can you dismiss the opinion of thr one human that has carried you in her stomache for 9 mths, and that breast fed and nursed you when u were little and weak. If there's ONE opinion to consider it should be your mother's, but time will teach you that lesson.
My mom has been married 4 times. Not taking advice from her. I’ll make my own decisions and live my life for me so that if something doesn’t work out I can blame myself.
I thank God that my mom met and loved my (now) husband before she passed away. They were able to bond for 4 years. In hospice, she introduced him to everyone as her son years before we were even engaged. I’m at ease knowing that she approved and would’ve wanted us to marry. I know that she’s smiling down on the life that we’re building together.
What if your parent doesn’t accept your relationship not because the guy is not good enough, or doesn’t make you happy (actually exactly the opposit) but because she doesn’t approve of who he is (for example because of his ethicity or because he has an illness)... what’s your viesws on this ?
Hmm... one has to determine if it's coming from a good place. Are the parents concerned about their image or the hardship on you? Sometimes parents project their fears thinking you're unable to handle situations when you actually can. If their justification is invalid, express your stance. They raised you to be "xyz", so why wouldn't you select "xyz" in a mate? Trust, believe... support me. Express from your mind, not the heart; be real with yourself. Weigh the pros and cons, and be willing to accept the out come if your parents disagree. Best wishes.
Jane Dough i really do understand what you re saying... i’ve been with my boyfriend for 4 years... after 1 year of being together, he got sick with a serious condition... it resulted in 9 surgeries in 3 years and now he has a pouch which allows him finally to live a « normal » life!we are both 28 y.o...He s so brave and amazing ! Such a generous soul and a giving heart... he s everything for me... Each step of the way, he had all type of complications, long healings, problems... but we fought through, we got help from a therapist, we stood strong... oooh it was sometimes really really hard to deal with. It is such a curse to deal with sickness at such a young age... being for months in a hospital, seeing other people suffer ! But it made us stronger and we juste know that we can surpass any difficulties... i grew up so so much with this « experience »! And became much confident as well... The problem is my parents can’t understand how i can stay with sbdy who had been sick... as you said they project their fears on me(he cab die, you gonna be alone someday, you re suffering for someone else etc) but i love my parents to death and not having their support in such situation, trial, experience is hurting me so much... i m so sadden by the fact they can’t see my strength and how i became a better person... how can someone blame another human being of loving someone who got sick... this is nobody’s fault... i m so sorry that i cause them stress and anxiety... but why can i do? Leave the person that i love ? I would only leave if i dont have the strength to go on anymore or don’t love him, or any problem that can cause a breakup... damn life is sometimes not easy 🤷🏻♀️
Yesim I my view is tell your mom that ether she accepts the person for who they are or and I’m not kidding you don’t talk to mom if she isn’t going to be open minded
Like Loni said if your parents aren't sleeping with him then they have to let YOU be the adult that you are and make a mistake if that what it is. I'm a parent and my job is to be there for my child and to provide her with the security to know that if he does break her heart like I expected but do not wish on my child, I will be there always. My mums parents weren't supportive of my dad and 27 years later here they are still married.
But it would still hurt you to see your kids get hurt, and you would wanna protect them, right? If you could somehow prevent your kid from getting hurt by someone you feel ain't right, wouldn't u do everything to try and prevent that?
SilverTongue Yes of course when it comes to natural disasters, fires, etc, but someone they love? No. My daughter is my child, but she's a human being with her own mind & heart. My job is to raise her well so she makes good decisions, but part of that is trusting myself AND her. Cos I can't protect her from everybody and I want to so while she is a young child I will. But once she's 21 and a legal adult in my culture if she chooses to love someone I don't like I'd rather love her so much she leaves on her own rather than forcing her to do something just because I think it's a bad idea. I've learned this from my friends. I have close friends who I worry about, but I'm not God. I'm not so perfect that I can save people with their own mind, free will, and sense from their choices. I CAN love them though and be there for them like I will always be for my child. Cos there's always the what if. My granddad tried to have my dad arrested to keep him away from my mum and it didn't help. It resulted in a 30 year marriage lol.
This is what I said to my 19 yrs old “if someone taking you away from GOD he is not for you” by all mean also a friends. I didn’t have growing these godly talk with my parents. Ever since I was born-again my life about God doesn’t mean I know everything. Yes--Doesn’t mean we don’t eat with sinners. Best things to do pray for everyone listen to THE HOLY SPIRIT. The end of the day we are not fighting against Flesh and blood. Bible said Ephesians 6:12 12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Even every since I become Christians my husband’s family don’t still approve me. We been married for 20 yrs. One thing I told my daughter if God wants her to have someone perhaps lead them to God and marriage not just dating or sleeping around. We have trust and obey GOD. We need to pray for each other. Not all us Grew up in church even if we have we have backslide. That’s why this Scripture nail in my heart ❤️ we walk my faith not by sight.
This is so true but I choose to be private. Once you start telling your Mom/family your business especially about your love life everyone is quick to start judging and throwing opinions out for free. 🤨😒
Omg your comment is so accurate! I recently spilled the beans about my love life to my family and now I'm hearing all the judgement. Next time, I am keeping it private!
My mom never approved any of my ex boyfriends. She still does not like my current boyfriend of 12 years. Well...she more just doesn`t care about him. She will never be happy with anybody. One was to tall, one was ugly to her (oh yes, like that was her problem), one was to short,....who cares what she thinks.
Yes it is by choice. Why should we tie the knot? I know a lot of couples who have kids my age and are together for 30+ years that never married. Besides a wedding costs a lot of money that we dont have.
For me it was both of my parents. If they didn't like him, I wouldn't be married to him right now. My parents are my best friends, so yes their opinions where a deciding factor, and still is regarding other issues❤
Yousra El amen same here! I need their blessings and input they are here before me for a reason they are wiser and full of helpful insight. My god given guidance❤️
If you love someone and your parents do not understand, try to listen to your parents and ask them why and see things from their perspective. Because honestly, they’re probably right.
h Bag not necessarily. At the end of the day parents are also humans capable of being very irrational, immature, and very judgmental of their children's boyfriends or girlfriends.
ypm 123 Her opinions didn't change about Lenny, he was a great guy and good to her but he wasn't RIGHT for her for life. She needed things he didn't do and she adapted to make it work but she is very clearly an affectionate person at heart. Israel gives her that in public and privately.
Tiffany Asians don’t really show their heart on their sleeves. Unfortunately, It’s considered “weakness” if you show that you’re heartbroken or sad. Then people judge you as if you’re beneath them
She's expressed that she's heartbroken, and even before she announced the divorce she was crying about the possibility. But like Danessa Z said, She can't feel sorry for herself forever. and she can tell her story to help others move forward too.
My mum has never liked any of my boyfriends. And not because she senses something weird or wrong. She always says stuff like “ he’s not good looking” or “ he “ doesn’t earn enough money” she goes far sometimes. She deliberately disregards my relationships. My dad on the other hand, as protective as he is, he senses which ones are good which are bad, and he openly tells me.
I mean, it really depends on your relationship with your mom. My mom and I do not get along. We are not close. She'd still be allowed to meet my man but unless she notices abusive tendencies, her liking of him will bear no weight what so ever.
Ariel Matthews same. We don’t beef, but my old school mom would have more of a say than my actual mom.sadly we just never were close like that for me to make a big decision in needing her approval
LittleBanana She's not lying. It's really how it is here. Even bringing a man home is VERY important once your parents see him you have already secured a marriage
Idk i love Adrienne, but I still cringe whenever she talks about her relationship. Like when she said how her mom was telling her about lenny not being the one, you would think she would have said that about the guy she did end up marrying... like baby stay tf away from that married ass man, even if he "seperated".
Leo Jimenez Agree. Unless Ade's mum knows something that we don't. I used to be anti-Israel & Ade but if he sat down at length with her family and talked about his mistakes then maybe she understood sthg. I guess we will see in a few years.
Dear @The Real Daytime thank you for listening to your fans (me) and making the segments longer, now we can fully understand where the topic started and what everybody said and hear everybody's opinion😆👊
First you have to find out why your mother doesn't like your partner. Family is such a big deal for me that I don't think I could be with someone that their parents don't approve of.
daniellelove I would never break up with someone because my parents don’t approve I actually have a policy I won’t introduce someone unless we have been dating for at least 6-8 months
What if they don't approve the second, third, fourth, fifth and etc...You still going to have them take over your life? Parents can have an opinion, but you need to learn from your own experiences and you be the judge of your own relationship/ marriage whether it is good or bad.
If he’s good to you. Treats you right. Respect you. Loves you. Care for you. And you’re happy with him. But for some reason your mom doesn’t like him. So You dump the guy? Yikes 😳
@@whatsupfoo4592 I don’t get how grown people let their parents run their life. Why break up with an amazing person if your parents don’t like them??? Also I think romantic lives should private anyways, who cares what your parents think?!!
My mom passed away in 2016 and now at 22 i don't know who i would bring a date around because my dad being almost 70 his advice would be outdated essentially cause his last relationship was my mom and they were together for almost 30 years. I'd probably have to ask my brothers for advice cause they are the next closest family members whose opinion i would respect
Ill respect your opinion but im not going to base my decesion on another opinion. Sometines parents can be stubborn and not see what you see and then they get to know your partner and have a change of heart.
I've been through the hardest heartbreak but what's killing me more is if I'll b there for my daughter in the future to help her go through it ! God it was so hard i don't wish it upon her or upon anyone !
of the guys I dated she only met four... and those were guys i dated for 6months or more...two of them are my best friends, one he said something unforgivable and the last he would have been my husband but God had other plans
I wont go into to much detail because i dont want to cry and (there is limited space lol), but He was the only guy to ever confess to my mother how he felt about me. He told my mother how much he loved me and how proposing was his intention, (not on her front porch on Halloween trying to frighten children but down the line), and it did happen a few months later. Despite him being a heavy smoker which she didnt like because of my exposure to secondhand smoke and the effect it would have on his health, she loved that he was protective of me in every possible way, she gave him the comfort in knowing that no matter what if she were to suddenly pass on or anything I would be ok, I would be safe. She loved how happy he made me, he gave a glow that she never saw before
I'm 16 and I've never had a boyfriend.... I'm not really scared for my mom because she's really sweet and I wouldn't bring anyone home that isn't worthy but my dad and older brother are..... Different. When it happens, it'll be interesting. 😂
I loved this one. My mom wasn't like that nor my dad. I had the discernment to know, this is the one and in July it'll be 15 years. When you know, you just know!
My mother did not like my bf in the beginning and I chose to accept it. After a while I believe she started to actually see what I saw in him and she loves him now and calls him her son but my mother never liked any of my boyfriends in the beginning anyway 😂 but one thing for sure I never force them to have a relationship you have to let it come natural and if it doesn’t then maybe mom was right after all 🤷🏾♀️
Hearing this topic makes me emotional. I was in a long term relationship and it didn’t work out. I got into another relationship a while after and my mom made a comment about “I hope you’re making the right decision this time, because I can’t get emotionally attached to too many people”. And that’s when it hit me..my parents are affected by who I date, too! Especially if they like the guy, which they always have. People: be careful about who you make official in your life
My mom has always been super overprotective. I think I also leaned in too much and desired her approval all the time. Recently, I've met someone and I want my mom to meet my bf. I respect her discernment and want her to see what I see. Unfortunately, she refuses to meet him bc he has a child and she doesn't want that for me as well as for religious reasons. She says it's not about him bc she doesn't know him, that it's about me and what she wants for my life. They're right though, it can't be forced and I just have to be patient and give things time but also be firm about what I want. Your man also has to be patient and just be consistent. I've seen myself change for the better though and if you're going through this and come from a good family....just remember your family isn't your enemy. They ultimately want what is best for you.
I miss my mom. She would respect me enough as a person and emerging adult, to not tell me "this is what you're not going to do," but loved me enough to let it be known that he was not really for me, and she was right whether it was: 1. Mmhmm 2. If you like it I love it...I guess 3. If that's what you want for yourself... or when I found the one that really rocked with me 4. It's about time, I didn't want to say anything but...it's about time.
Question: if your parents didn’t like your boyfriend at one time because of something he did but made amends with you and/or changed and they still don’t like him because of that is that really a fair evaluation or they just automatically right because of the past? #RU-vidLetsTalk
Your parents, sisters, brother's & your loved ones can see what you cannot see, cos love is blind. Listen to them, open your eyes/heart. And be led by the Spirit. Romans 8:14
