WHEN ONE FILIPINA ISN'T ENOUGH - Polygamy and Harems in the Philippines 

Any guy who tries to create a "harem" is crazy!

Polygamy: A young man's dream and an older man's nightmare

I lived in Central Africa for about 5 years in the 1980s. I found out that if a man could afford more than one wife, he was expected to have more than one wife. This was not because the man wanted the extra wives, but because women were expected to be cared for. If a man's bother is killed, then his bother is expected to take on his brother's wife. I thought it was strange in the beginning, but now it makes sense.

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I'm a poly guy from the US poly, when done right, is a beautiful thing. You have people to support you, a large family to help every one grow, less financial stress, And all the attention you could ever want

I just dont get how millions of people with a long history of failed relationships always swear this type of relationship is destined to fail

I like the fact that you asked multiple types of people.. local & foreign

I had a Vietnamize friend who's neighbor in Viet Nam had two wives. When she asked what her neighbor thought about it, the lady said there was more shared work so it was easier

I know some folks in a poly relationship. 1 man and 3 women, all have been friends for a long time and capable of their own support. It seems to work for them. The women have their days of the week with the man and the women enjoy each other's comfort as well. I don't think I could do what they do, but it works for them. Of course there isn't any marriage involved, there also doesn't seem to be any real conflict. I've seen traditional relationships with more conflict.

@Thefilipinapea Thank goodness my wife is opened to this. She is Filipina/ Japanese. Most people don't understand the benefits of this. We see generational wealth, and the "List" goes on. Most people new to the idea, they think its about "LUST". That's not the key. You have to prepare your mindset, have life-goals, and a strategy on how to manage everything. I had to recreate myself for this lifestyle. The problem is "FINDING Filipina who are interested".

You have great screen present. The sweetness voice and the most expressive eyes.

Not everyone realizes, more wives means more mothers-in-law! 🤣

My great grandfather had 2 wives (this was over 100 yrs ago-he was the "Soysauce King" of Southern China). He sent at least 2 sons (one was my grandpa) overseas to study and to start businesses. They never divorced. In some ways, if the man is good, there's more stability than nowadays with average marriage lasting less than 7 years with a 55% divorce rate!

One family to support is plenty enough.

I'm a practicing Muslim and I'm telling you based on personal experience that Polygamy is not for everyone, it is hard to manage and maintain, requires a very resourceful husband, a very forgiving wife and a major reason to be in such marriage ... nevertheless for our Pinay sisters I see it very difficult because of cultural stigma and uprising values ... Filipinas are very jealous in general, so it will be very emotionally challenging for Filipinas to be into a polygamous marriage with any man either foreigner or pinony ... congrats on another very successful video my dear Pea

Ok. I have read at least 90% of the comments and "none" of them are wrong (except a couple odd ones). Here is my point. It all depends on the maturity level of the individuals who are in the consenting relationship. Mutual respect is needed on all sides. Women and men for the "most" part have one major common thing for each. The majority of men wants to be emotionally cared for mentally and sexually (which actually changes with age). The majority of women wants to be emotional cared for mentally (here is the common between men and women), security and personal welfare for her and children (most important for women). Unfortunately, sex is not as import to women as to men.

I really LOVE your "Interview" videos and this one was VERY GOOD. There were a wide variety of responses and I liked how you would "flip" the questions and even that got an even wider range of responses. I agree with the one gentleman, just having one woman at times can be more than enough for me to handle. I have always just had one partner in my relationships and always remained faithful to my partner. I would NEVER EVER cheat on my FOREVER LOVE, Cap'n Pea....!!

What many people are not aware of is that the Christian Bible fully supports polygyny with many examples of this marriage practice. If it was OK with God during biblical times, it's OK for today!

It's nothing wrong with having multiple wives just make sure you be able to financially and physically take care of them .

While I'm not actually interested in doing anything in the Philippines, and especially not interested in polygamy starting a harem, this video series has been an interesting look into certain aspects of your culture. Keep it up!

This just popped up in my feed. Loved the video. I had my own experience with a Filipina back around 2002 - 2003. It was intense, but she was young, silly, and unfaithful, so I had to end it. Strangely, she STILL calls me from time to time to try to get back with me. I'm not sure I understand why. Anyway, subscribed!

I can imagine that 4 wives might be fun in the beginning for some men, but I can’t imagine having 4 mother in laws or 4 families to look after😊

I found my absolute beauty, but I can’t lie, there’s always many that spin my head in every city and province. Self control is a must

In the nineties I met 2 old guys with harems in gensan, they weren't married to any of them. It was completely a financial deal for the young girls, I asked the guys about girls fighting, but they said if there was problems they put them out and got another. It seemed like the girls aged out and moved on after a few years.

I'm a Muslim,, came to the Philippines in 2015 .. got married to Filipina in manila ... we had issues because "she and her family" think I own a bank lol ... anyway ... I run away to Cebu .. I met a nice girl and we got married in 2020 (we are very very happy) .. no one questioned me when I had my 2nd certificate?!!

One question you kept asking I feel the need to push back on. Love vs financial gain. They are not mutually exclusive. A relationship/marriage depends on many factors. A spouse can be in it for love and economic security and companionship and a family and shared values and physical attraction, companionship, and more.

One good woman is more than enough for me. But i just want a quiet, peaceful, happy life. I don't need unnecessary drama. One woman working with me towards the same goals and dreams.

If you haven't already read it (and if you can find a copy there), a book by Don Milton called "Prince of Sumba: Husband to Many Wives" is about an American missionary who, even though married, enters into a polygamous relationship with seven young Filipina women. Worth a read, regardless of your feelings on the issue.

As long everybody is happy 🥰

Something I'm experiencing and have learned, studied, and researched is that households with 1 man and multiple, 4 to 5, women are very stable and emotionally healthy households. The only time that there's ever an issue with these households is when there's selfishness, narcissism, and or jealousy. And these traits are not inherent as these traits occur when the society people are raised in creates such traits because of the folkways, taboos, and norms regarding relationships. Overwhelmingly these traits have come from religious indoctrination and delusion.

I have family members that practice polygamy with having more than 1 wife. With more than 1 wife, I think it can work only because I've seen it work. With having more than 1 husband, they would definitely have to get DNA tests to figure out who the father actually is. You're definitely correct though, jealousy is a real thing with polygamy. I've seen it with my family members that practice.

I definitely have to book a flight tomorrow!!! Keep up the amazing work Pea

Years ago I had a friend who had six wives. They got along and were the best of friends. Each had their own space and a good deal of respect for each other. They all shared in everything and that seemed to only strengthen the bond. It worked for them. While I'm not opposed to someone having that sort of thing as it's none of my business. I don't think I would want it. I can't imagine being married to more than one Filipina. The tempo factor alone would be too much. Beside the fact that when I'm in a relationship I don't even check out another girl because for me, that would be like I was disloyal to the girl. So there's that.

I believe in polygamy and I want to try. Thank you for the video. I didn't know, it seems to be more common and accepted as I thought.

One man with multiple women is how our hunter gatherer ancestors lived. Our instincts, desires & fears are genetic memories passed down by the survivors. Men died in greater number so their were always more women to go around then men. The instinct/desire to form a harem is the result of that situation.

Happy Sunday, Houston Astros WIN The World Series! Keep putting up the high quality content that so many of us have grown to love!

My GF keeps thinking I will take another girlfriend/wife because I'm Muslim. I tried to explain to her that every woman in a Muslim marriage must be treated equally. Each must have their own assets, not shared with the others. Plainly, I told her, she packs enough Loca loca and Tambo for one relationship. I don't need twice that.

Hello Pea , when I was a young man in the navy I was exposed to that on one of my two months stays in your country. All I can say is that every one, the three of us were well fed and happy.

The first time I visited the Philippines to visit my gf, I learned about the extra wifes some Filipinos have. It was my regular driver that said he had a brother with several wives. He didn't approve it. Let's face it, the Philippines has a macho culture. Having more than one wive is considered a good thing in such a culture. The Philippines is sometimes called a super catholic country but that doesn't mean Filipinos abide the rules of the church, in contrary, Filipinos tend to break all laws, both religious and secular, lol.

I don't mind having 2 or 3 wives. I was In a relationship that I ended because she wasn't sexual enough for me. But I did love and care about her. I ended the relationship and felt like I abandoned her. Then I started a new relationship. But I can love both just the same.

Good evening Pea. 3rd dose of vitamin Pea this week, and it does the spirit good! Now, Let's get that algorithm going!

I’ve been in a monogamous relationship for several years. I was also once in an open relationship for several years. I’ve know several other couples over the years who’ve had varying styles and degrees of consensually multiamorous relationships. Here’s what I’ve learned: 1. As far as relationships go, they both have advantages and disadvantages. You’re essentially trading one set of issues for another. Which style of relationship you “should” have may depend on which set of issues you’re more comfortable dealing with. 2. Poly relationships aren’t for everyone. Monogamous relationships aren’t for everyone either. (See also: the divorce rate in the US.) Some can be happy in either style. For people who can learn and be honest with themselves about this, they’ll likely be happier and more successful in relationships for it. 3. Most people have no idea the degree to which sociocultural indoctrination plays into their personal opinions about relationships styles. If they knew, they might be less judgmental (and this does go both ways). 4. Most relationships fail. We all keep trying and failing until eventually we don’t.

I once worked with a Pinoy, who said he had 3 wives but on 3 different islands. Hahahah

couple decades ago we had an apartment in Bonifacio where as several alternative couples/throuples (bi-girls) came and went over about a 12 year time period, and we felt it worked out fairly well for the most part - you'd occasionally have someone with a personality that became territorial to an individual but those didn't seem to last long and would move along over time - we saw it as a 'communal' of shared expenses ...'ourself' we picked up the annual cost of the apartment and electric... we were working abroad (middle-east) on 30/30's and spending our every other month off (and times between contracts) at 'The Fort' - the same two girls this started with were there in the end as well (after twelve years) although there was about a three year period where they split and we had a different house- ah, we'll call her a 'female patriarch', before their return ...at times it was sorta the afterparty safe-space for those of the same 'mindset' (bi-girls) {to be honest we don't think these relationships would work with traditional hetero concepts among the girls, sure favorites exist but everyone has to be into everyone for it to really work} - we had always let the girls create their own rules and hierarchies as long as there were no other guys in the space ('our rule', lol) ...it was our homestead of "extra rice" lol - when we returned to the States for good, we paid for one last year of rental but wasn't there. ahh, the stories we could tell, and the wisdom accumulated over time relative to what worked (and what didn't) in these environments - personally we think your situation would work well (province family with kids), if the girls got along 'and were into each other', lol - over time, they'd have special issues due to the special situation, but come on, what relationship doesn't go through its times of issues that have to be walked through and sorted out / that's life we wen't back to The Fort for three weeks a few years ago (Sept, 2019), but couldn't find anyone from the past, parties were easy to find, nothing had really changed, while 'everything' had changed, lol

My goodness- one Filippino is enough... I've been together and married to one for 24 years now... There's enough Love, Goodness, and Devotion in my wife to last a lifetime... Of course Jesus is the center of our lives, from the start, to help us along the way... May God Bless you Filipina Pea and your family and don't forget to *2 Peter 3:18* Pagpalain ka nawa ng Diyos na Pinay Pea at ang iyong pamilya at huwag kalimutang * 2 Pedro 3:18 *

I was brought up that my heart is huge in friendship and caring, but ONLY big enough for one woman. She is the one and only woman that I will stand in front of to protect, and walk beside me through life. Many friends of mine, that were Navy, had multiple girl friends and I could never understand how they kept all of these women straight in their mind. For me - one woman is plenty and will get every bit of caring and love I have.

It seems like an odd coincidence that this came out after David Bond did his harem quest in the Philippines. Pea, you should comment on his videos. Thanks for the great content as always.

I’m poly because of how I have learned about the nature of women from where I’ve grown up. Get a man, trap him. Restrict the sex. Take halve. This is the nature of about 90% of the women I’ve met. And they all claim to have been different. When I turned into a chad, it became instantly aware that monogamous relationships only benefited the woman. And 100% of the couples always said it was hard. When I changed to poly, life just got easier and sex less controlled against me. As well as keeping the woman abreast of the idea that she is replaceable keeps her from trying to turn me into a weaker version of myself.

The Apollo 13 skit reminded me of when fist class lounge was closed in Manila. Woman said I could file a complaint and someone would "get back to me".

As long as the women aren't petty and understand it's a team effort, it can work. Have a big house for space when the mood swings happen. I had a three's company situation in the past. It worked great until one passed from cancer.

With the way the laws are, I wouldn't even want one wife lol

A surprising range of views with your interviewees! I’m sure a lot of guys fantasise about having a variety of women available to them, but the reality is a little more tricky 🤔 I’m with the older guy you interviewed who was more concerned about keeping just one woman happy! That’s a challenge with rewards I’m more than satisfied with! 😂😅

My wife is bi, and we have lived with a third (she was also bi) before. It turned out to be really good. It was indeed more complicated, lots of communication and caring about the others feelings are needed, lots to work out. But when it works, it really is beautiful - the synergy of love, (my favorite part, although the sex was fantastic also :) ), three minds working together to solve problems, if one is away or sick, the other two have each other for support, the girls have a built -in best friend to talk girl talk, go shopping with (thank goodness, I hate going shopping with a girl :) ). Surprisingly, another facet I really loved was showing my middle finger to the "established norms" and people who think they need to tell others who to love, and how one should be in a relationship. (If you're reading this, and are one of these judgemental idiots, "I faart in your general direction!!" :) Antway, we all slept together in the same (very big :) ) bed, but each of us also had our own room for some occasional alone time too, this was important. Not to mention, three incomes instead of two makes for a more efficient, better lifestyle, and less worry about one getting laid off and resulting problems. That's really nice. I think everyone should at least try it (Polyamory) . The things you need to learn to make it work, communication, working together, being cognizant of each other's feelings, etc., are valuable lessons, and applicable to a two person relationship , too. By the wany, as terms are important- Polyamory is loving more than one person. Polygamy is marriage to more than one person. Polygyny specifically refers to a man who has multiple wives. Polyandry refers to a woman who has multiple husbands. Being "poly" simply refers to not being constricted to the typically accepted two person relationship. Thanks, Ms. Pea, for shining some light on this often hidden, but more common than you might think subject. You're wonderful , as always.

Very well made video on an interesting topic. Two thumbs up 👍🏾👍🏾

I REALLY like your RU-vids, Pea, they are interesting (not for me - but they are fascinating to learn about), You must have a very open mind to ask the questions you do, and I rather like it, I don't mean it's interesting for me actually but it's fascinating to see YOUR style of interviewing. But DOG how do you keep your own opinions out of it?

Makes plenty of sense to me for the sake of wanting multiple children and wanting a larger family. Id support at minimum 2 families and when I'm gone I'd be sure to set up both for success after i pass.

It really depends on the partners (more than just the traditional two). I can see where a man has feelings (emotional and sexual) for another who is not his wife, but the same is true of her. If everyone is okay with it, why not? But serious problems can still arise. Be prepared!

POLYGYNY IS NOT FOR EVERYONE. NEITHER IS MARRIAGE.

Great topic! I've had these conversations with several Filipinas. It takes a very special, secure & mature lady to be able to share a man. Key issues are the understanding of possession, delineation of responsibilities, jealousy, cooperation vs competition viewpoints, outsider interference, judgements of extended family & the legal issues mostly prompted by catholocism. The man must be open & honest at all times, but must also be very careful to discourage rivalries vs encouraging them. I know of ONE woman w two partners. Her situation is special. She loves her legal husband whom she has grandchildren with, but he can't meet her needs. So long as her side lover stays in his lane & causes no interference, the situation works. She's a wonderful woman whom I kniw well. I fully suuport her family decisions (yes, her husband & kids all know).

I love this channel ❣️ please continue don't change beautiful honesty is 🗝️

I think this is one of those things that a lot of guys fantasize about but in reality it’s not as good as the fantasy…

To broaden the question , Pea, I wonder how many Filipina/ Expat relationships are based on love?

Single motherhood and polygamy are related, and if data on this existed, you'd find that for 300 single mom filipinas there's probably a hundred fathers. Openly having several wives is just the visible tip of the iceberg, and I'm betting that it's actually more prevalent than anyone thinks.

I like Filipinas , I lived in Jordan and I had relationship with 8 Filipina ladies worked there in six years , six ladies r married and two were single, married ladies looked for sex because they can't just stop do it after they enjoyed it with their husbands, Filipinas r very nice sweet humble and good-hearted , I like Filipinas for an important physical reason.

That would be too complicated for me lol 😂

The girl with the white top and the short hair has one of the best smiles I've ever seen. I also love how Filipinos say the word Disaster it somehow has an extra syllable in it 🤣. Multiple girlfriends maybe multiple wives never.

What a way to start the weekend, polygamous Pea. Fortunately in most US states this weekend we gain an hour due to Daylight Savings Time ending (an outdated idea that most people hate) so we can rest up and contemplate the weighty questions posed by the Pea. Take care.

The keys are honest communication (from everyone), reasonable expectations, and sufficient money. Same as monogamous relationships, but more required on every point. Most people can't pull it off.

Marriage is a financial transaction. When a guy gets money and has made something of himself he can afford more than one female.

It makes sense and should not be outlawed as long as it comes with responsibility to provide and accountability by the man for his children

I know someone in an open marriage. I told her it sounds like a disaster. Being married to two people sounds even worst. Jealousy, money, and even betrayal in favor of one wife can ruin things. Stay away as far as possible from that is my solution.

one is enough for me. trying to remember more than 1 anniversary or birthday is hard enough lol. I can give you some insight in to this topic. I have never done it myself but I did live in a lifestyle that allowed for it depending on the people involved. I can say that for most people it will end up with one or more people being very made and probably leaving the relationship. I can't speak for Muslims as I have no experience with it. It's not for me to tell someone else how to live.

This is completely unrelated but I do value your input. I will travel to the Philippines around February and enjoy learning local languages. However, in the Philippines, there are many languages depending on the region. I plan on visiting multiple islands so I can't choose by region. Which language would you recommend learning?

You gotta have the Personality for it. Not a Jealous Personality, confident, open minded and very social and less needy.

YOU ARE THE ONLY FILIPINA I NEED!!!

When I was in my late 20s/early 30s, I would have been capablabe of a poly-relationship. Yet, when I grew older and in love with my wife deeper, then it was not compatible with my Catholic faith nor my feelings with my wife. If we'd been in a postion before children and faith, it could-would have been possible. I think of William Moulton Marstonm his wife Elizabeth Holloway Marston, and their polyamorous life partner, Olive Byrne, All three the creator(s) to the comic character Wonder Woman. She was the amalgamation of Elizabeth and Olive. He dies at the age 54. After his death, Elizabeth and Olive continued to live together until Olive's death in 1990, aged 86; Elizabeth died in 1993, aged 100. Marston had two children each with both and women, who each adopted the other's children to unify their throuple replationship even stronger. Marston is hearld as the inventor of the lie dectector polygraph machine and the 1928 DISC (dominance, inducement, submission, and compliance. traits in people) emotional and behavioral theory. As for sexy time, it's starts with the strongest sexual organ - the mind.

I think the ideal mating strategy for most men is to have one main girl, and a bunch of women on the side. And of course, it has to be a one-way open relationship on the man’s end. No man is going to share his woman.

With jealousy so ingrained in the culture…. I can’t imagine that would be workable…to each his own….but to this Kano I would not even consider that !! One heart, one mind, ONE LOVE !! 🇺🇸💝🇵🇭

Love your work Pea. Please don't cut off my jib, you have a great sense of humour and fun. Thanks for sharing.

Outside of always great content.....you never cease to crack me up!

I think it's all personal choice and find it hard to believe that the topic of marriage is still a legal matter. In todays world most people are to immature to deal properly with a relationship.

Hell yeah I want more hahaha! Even if it didn't work out it would be so much fun to try

I think it would be very difficult to find the time to have a plural relationship and satisfy the emotional needs of the parties involved. There are those who can financially afford it, they may even have the organizational skills to make it work. But, I seriously doubt anyone, male or female, has the ability to properly emotionally support more than one family. support

Very good. Very good. The ending was very witty, especially the sunken chest part. 😂💖😎

I'm a late 30s American man and have been living in Philippines for 6 years so I have experience on this topic. Majority of women are fine with sharing a high value man if they have the opportunity to do so regardless of what they say. Women would rather share a high value man than have a low value man all to themelves. Have a whole 6 inch pizza to herself or have one slice of a 24 inch pizza that she shares with others. If that slice is bigger than the entire 6 inch pizza the choice is obvious. And the pizza analogy doesnt only need to represent financial status but can represent total package such as physical attractiveness personality attitude of the man (and yes $exual prowess also). By sharing with others, a woman can get a higher quality higher value man that she can get all to herself. This is actually the trend in modern female dating preferences now.

When I was younger, I was dating 3 women simultaneously ( two of them were aware of the arrangement ), and despite the routine sexual fun; I found it impossible to truly devote enough time towards a quality relationship with any single one of them. I have been happily married for 16 years now, and I just do not see how a plural marriage would work, especially when so many responsibilities involved in relationships, child rearing, and work demand so much time. It is far more sensible to strive for quality of your relationship to one wife. But then again, it might be suitable for others.

I have studied, and contemplated this topic over the period of my 56 years of adulthood. My conclusions on the topic remain in flux. I’ve seen times when the idea of two or three wives appeared feasible,and almost desirable. Then something would snap🎉 me back into reality. e.g. sobering up. I was married for 27 years. Now I have been single for about 10 years. I neither enjoy, nor dislike either of those two more than the other. However, I suspect , I have just enough patience and tolerance, along with foolhardiness to try it one more time with one more woman. I know I do not have the stamina nor the sadism to even look at another woman.

Something tells me that if I have a harem, there's going to be a huge tampo problem.

Great video about Utah.

Great video thank you for sharing 😊

I am a Christian and also a strong believer in polygny, I believe a man's primary responsibility is to have a vision for his family ( clearly explaining his vision to his potential wife or wives) so that she (or they) can decide before things get serious if she or they want to be part of the family he intends to create,....

Absolutely I would want another wife. I am a staunch polygyny advocate and I see it both as being honest and committed to the principal of relationship unions. I abhor the amount of cheating and side chicks I see so pervassive throughout the world. I see the amount of single mothers who are left destitute with children whom grow up perpetuating the under class they were born into. I believe if polygyny were legal and embraced by women they would be reluctant to select a man who is not properly prepared and commitment to the relationship. An for men that do not adocately prepare themselves financially, educationally and emotionally to be a woman/women choice, they might never find a female partner because the rich successful and prepared men will be the choice for women.

I only want one woman to spend my life with. I think having multiple wives would cause jealousy and envy between them. In my heart I wouldn’t feel loyal to my wife if I had other women too. I don’t want to be cheated on, so I don’t cheat either. Treat others the way you want to be treated.

You are amazing, so funny and creative! I love this channel. Thank You, Pea!!! 💜 OMG, I'm still smiling. 🥰

The Irish accent is impressive. You would make a good actress

One woman with who you really connect is enough - although a spare for times of tampo could be handy (kidding). In Senegal, I've seen a relationship between two wives on one man which seemed to work well for both women - in as much as they could babysit and even feed each other babies. They each had their own hut. Interestingly, I never met their husband an suspect he was too busy working away as he needed to support both families. I loved the interviews - some really hilarious answers. You're a great interviewer - whatever the topic Pea.

It possibly could work if you were raised in that type of culture that it was openly accepted. But from American standpoint, I don't really ever see it honestly working. There are polyamorous relationships over here, and people openly talk about it. But the actual success of it is hit or miss realistically. Some people just did it for the sake of benefits and partners, while others only did it as a means of satisfying themselves. I really don't see how that would work in a Filipino / Western relationship. Very often the people that I was with, and especially my current partner have been very territorial. My fiancee gets very jealous knowing that my best friend over here is a girl, despite the fact that she is 7 years my senior and a lesbian. So with traditional Filipino values, and Western ideology, I don't really think it can work if it was a Westerner and a Filipina unless he had a bunch of money and they were doing it for the sake of benefits. I remember my Fiancee's best friend and her boyfriend were trying something. Then it later turns out that he was just cheating on her.

I don’t care how much a guy makes, being married to more than one woman is compounding your troubles exponentially.

The blonde chick at 4.00 is super cool and has a great attitude so a big SHOUT OUT to her !! What is her name ? Great interviews Pea - well done.

She needs her OWN SHOW