They start a nasty argument to cause a breakup so they can get with someone they’ve been wanting to be with. When they’re done they expect to just come right back to you while claiming they are not a cheater so they aren’t a total dog.
and then they try to project total dog back onto you yes (am so done with angry toxic person) and for that reason i am out They be trying to pull you back into that dynamic but that dynamic is pure poison ...go no contact...run
I lasted 4months with my girlfriend narcissist, never heard of a narcissist before and Im 68 years old, still learning about women, I think I will just stay single.
There's a lot of great people out there. You only live once.. I've read 5% of people have some sort of this crazy problem though.. if they can't take a no let them go..❤
This nation is full of misogynists so I don't believe that men are victims of women or children personally except in very few cases and if the man is a misogynist he got what he gave. Just my opinion however 😊
Now I realise everything that's happened to me, I'm absolutely hurting bad.I was in an abusive relationship before but now it's happened again. It's actually worse being abused by a narcissist than the relationship before which was more violent. Because a narcissist hides it all whereas the other abuse didn't hide anything.
Same here but I had a terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach Will never ignore my intuition again Spent almost 2 years with this lying cheating manipulator MONSTER
When you first meet them, you allow them into your life but they have withheld tons of information about their heinous nature and past victims. So it's easier for them to get in the door the first time. Later they may get back in due to a trauma bond. But if your eyes open to who they really are you will never allow them access to you again.
Well done! For me, the first 7-8 days were the absolute worse. As a man I felt like lying on the floor and just crying all day. Then I started to feel better when I began to listen to various other experiences from people all over the world from RU-vid and podcasts. Its amazing how they seem to be reading from the same book these narcissists. Thank God I'm free from her manipulative, lying, ways. and I learned a lot about myself as well.
Narcissists love control /manipulation, as a Sigma male I spotted it straight away. Insecurity is the root cause of this behaviour. It's exhausting and stressful , silence stops them dead in their tracks. Throwing a tantrum is childlike behaviour. All they want is a financial provider and a servant to do all the chores.
I'm 54 and I never realized what a narcissist was. This video really gave me insight and closer. I was in an awful relationship for maybe a year. Everything she's saying is spot on. I'm so glad I'm not with him anymore. Now I'm with someone who truly loves me and treats me with respect. We've been together for 17 years 😊
After you leave they will try everything to get you back and if it doesn’t work, then they will try to take your life. I’ve survived it. My mother didn’t. Run far away
Man your so right she invited me over one night then when I arrived ignored my phone calls and then calls the cops and tells them she thinks someone is trying to break in and she’s in fear for her life and luckily the cops who arrived weren’t trigger happy assholes and once I showed them the text messages I filled her story full of holes they ended being upset with her and let me walk away and that was my sign this woman was willing to endanger my life … survivor here aswell blind sided by this I’ve never dealt with someone like that ever in my life but I’ll just let Karma do its thing atleast I’m finally free !
This is very true for me. My narc was my childhood sweetheart. I know now she was never who I thought she was, she was an abusive cheat and a liar, but when you're young and in love you're blind. I built my whole life round her, we had the big white wedding, bought a house, started trying for kids. But life wasn't perfect and neither was I, I began to struggle a bit after a suicide in my family and a few other things, fell into a depression and wasn't being the perfect husband. So instead of trying to get through it with me, she just found someone else, kicked me out (on the anniversary of the suicide, no less), moved him in and carried on as if nothing had happened, smear campaign to cover her tracks, the whole works. I lost everything. It utterly destroyed me, I felt like my whole life was just worth nothing. I knew there was no way back once I discovered the affair so I went and filed for divorce, then arranged to go and see her to speak about what would happen next. It was all very civil when we spoke, but I worked out quite quickly that she didn't believe I had really seen a lawyer. Over the course of the conversation, she slowly realised I was serious, and when I stood up to leave, she stood in front of the door, burst into tears and said "this isn't what I want. I don't want you to go." It broke my heart to do it, but I told her it was too late and left. In the weeks that followed, she discarded everything we'd agreed and became as unreasonable as possible, which eventually cost her thousands in the settlement - I had pretty much given her everything but because of how she was acting I went no contact and told my lawyer to take what I was entitled to. She didn't want a smooth divorce, she wanted to fight. I couldn't understand it at the time. Years later, just after she had remarried the man she left me for (her new soul mate) and had 2 kids, she suddenly showed up in my life and broke down again. "I've dug myself into such a hole I don't know how to get out of it." Then, another few years later, she phoned me out of the blue late one night and asked... well, practically told me to take her back. I said no. She slammed the phone down, went back to him and is still there. She's tried to wheedle her way back in a few times since, but I'm totally no-contact now. Last I heard from her was 2016. I'm 46 now, single, no kids, I've pretty much wasted my whole life on this person and I'm still not properly over it. It's taken me a long time and it's hard to grasp, because when she left she did such a good job of destroying me and making me feel utterly worthless, but I've slowly started to make sense of it. She thought she could do what she wanted and I would always be there. She thought having an open affair would make me snap out of it and become the husband she wanted. When she realised that wasn't the case, she wasn't capable of admitting she'd done something terrible or apologising. The only thing she could do was try to cause more pain in the hope of getting a reaction. When she didn't get it, she went further. Then further. It sounds terrible but I think even her kids and her marriage were a big part of that "hole" she dug for herself. She really thought at some point she would push far enough and I'd come back. Not that I think I was "special" to her. It's just that she can't stand that I walked away. She thought I couldn't live without her and I'd do anything to keep her, no matter how badly she treated me, and it's cut her to the core that I'm really gone because it's made her realise that SHE isn't special. I just wish it hadn't taken me half my life to realise it.
Hello are stories are close you sound so strong. Although I have been NC and off social media I just heard she is engaged only after year of discard and I am blocked. Anyway are stories are similar and unfortunately I lost everyone close to me. We worked together and unfortunately starting to think old friends are happy for her even though they witnessed her destruction of me. Long story short was wondering if you called text me. Just having difficulty. I actually to someone I hate my life. 😢
@weird_al77 I want to applaud you for being vulnerable and sharing your experience in the comments. You did a great job expressing your thoughts in a fluent manner that felt like I was reading different chapters of your life. Thanks for breaking each point into paragraphs so it didn't come off as ranting, but a healthy emotional release of a life learned lesson from a difficult experience. I can definitely relate to a lot of things in your story and sometimes it does feel like wasted time. But I believe God's Timing is Perfect and it's never too late to learn from your setback and make way for a grand comeback. Their loss and now someone else's gain. Keep sharing your experience with others on their journey and be truly blessed and happy in all you do in life!
Yea I had never heard of narcissism before, so I was blind when I met this beautiful girl. I thought it seemed kinda weird how fast we moved, very early on she was telling me how much she loved me and wanted to marry me and everything else I wanted to hear. I'm 53 years old so I thought I was the luckiest mo fo on earth. I was married for 27 years and at the time I had been divorced for 4 years. But oh yea i found out all about narcissistic people and how there evil people. God bless everyone out there. Be careful who you meet.
Just felt the wrath of a narcissistic women recently too! Wildest 3 weeks of my life. Hopefully she leave me alone after I return her items she left at mine. The worst thing is they make themselves appear to be the kind of person that you want to invest in emotionally, then when you do, they attack your emotions and have studied enough about you to say things that will hurt/ cut deep. Stay safe kings, lots of crazy in this world!!
@@realdeal8225 exactly bro. We were together for 7 months. She moved in an the whole thing. So yes I know exactly what you mean. I went no contact like everyone advices. She tried to contact me a couple times but I did not respond. Haven't heard from in 5 months. God bless you bro.
Bro, I know exactly how you feel... I've totally lost any hope to be in a real loving relationship. I've lost faith in humanity. Life has changed drastically in general for everyone and their mindset. I wish I knew about Narcissistic behavior earlier. I missed all the bright red flags. Be well
Thank you for the video. My ex- narcissist gf is coping hard. She's still trying to call me every day, sometimes 2-3 times a day! She's probably trying to hoover. But I blocked her. I'm so glad to get out of that toxic relationship. 💚
This is what my narc ex is saying about me...I keep trying to call him because he flunked with my mind and heart and I want to have my say and shout at him for his disgusting treatment of me...
Thank you. I love it when you say: when you’re done! You’re not coming back. I have reached that threshold. That’s it ! When you’re done, you’re done ! That’s it - you’re not coming back! Oh - thank you! So clear ! So powerful ! Celebration time has come! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🍾🥳🍾🎊🍾🎊🍾!
Walked away from the cheating, lying narc ex in April And went no contact straight away, played all the tricks in this video, 4 hoovering attempts and I rejected each one…..I think she now knows not to try again as she cannot face another rejection as rejection is her worst fear.
6 months later and my nervous system is just starting to get back to baseline. My weight and appetite is coming back as well. It's shocking how much her behavior had on my overall health.
What did it take for you to get a divorce from your Narc My narc won't even sign the papers and keep running back in forth from Nevada to Minnesota. I really want out of the marriage. Please help me if you could. Thanks in advance..
Thank you for this video, Anoushka. I had a hard day today after months of doing well. It was a like a ghost neural network trying to re-ignite all over a single bad memory. Oh my, healing is like layers of an onion. I will not give up, I will keep doing the work. Great video, you are a literal God-send.
Im so sorry to hear that you had a hard day yesterday. Yes the journey is up and down, but there is healing that will happen. It is exactly like an onion but keep moving forward, for you. And in the process you will discover new parts of you 😊
@@anoushkamarcin thank you so much for the encouragement, I take it to heart! I have really been enjoying your lives, you are right, great vibes. I missed yesterday though and felt the absence. Going to try to attend regularly bc it helps so much. Have a good day!
This has answered so many little nagging questions that have been lingering as I've been listening, learning and reflecting on my own experiences with narcissists. My arsenal is now complete and I am galvanized. Thank you!
I gave 38 years and have lost my children. I am so grateful I found God and now I'm fully awake. Imagine trying to say sorry for manipulating your babies you carried for 9 months and taking them out of your life. I am far too good for him! Thank you Anoushka, difficult to listen to but well worth it.
So true that the narcissists make us hate them. I hate my ex and will never return to the devil. He cheated, lied, abandoned me with many silent treatments then had the nerve to ghost me. Even wort he popped up after ghosting me and I did not give him the chance to hoover me. I walked away and never going back because I dispise him after he ghosted me. I hope he rots in hell.
So then they're just going to eat, drink and be merry toast up party. Go to the next club, go to the next event and just try to forget about you because they'll be around a lot of beautiful people, handsome guys or beautiful ladies and that's the way they call themselves. Not thinking about you anymore. But meanwhile they do have to get some quiet and alone time and that's when you come across their head and then that's when they got to do that drug or the drinking or eating to fill that void. But believe me they're hurting somewhere. We just don't see it
This is me trying to recover and protect myself from an entire family of Narcissists!. This is making me think I’m the Narcissist because that’s how they’re all treating me!
I am so done with Mr Gemini. He cannot break me though he has tried desperately hard to destroy me. Jog on with your side pieces, no more lies and you cannot steal from me anymore. I am walking to freedom and peace
My ex, after I told him I needed him to leave, so I can heal. As he was packing his truck, he actually said, "I don't even understand what's happening right now." It's amazing how little they actually realize what they've done. Maybe it's pretense, but he actually seemed confused.
They sure do jump to the next person, within days if they hadn’t been grooming someone behind your back. Where as we take massive timeouts from relationships after our experience to self reflect and learn more about how to better ourselves. They learn more manipulative tactics through us, unbeknownst to us.
@@LovingLightx I had women trying to mess with me while I was going through all that and still married. It was flattering but made me feel sick due to the fact that they knew I was married. I waited awhile to start hanging out with the other sex again and when I did, it still felt wrong, even though I was single. I honestly don't think I'll ever get married again.
@@LovingLightx when the truth came out about who she is, she then went out and got herself a nice DUI with my last name attached to it. Good times. Forgive me if I don't care about that level of relationship anymore.
Ideally, don't get that far into a relationship with them in the first place, I was lucky, the last one that tried to reel me wasn't very successful. I wasn't much attracted to her and noticed some silly things she was telling when we first met, so I didn't get attached much. The insincere mirroring and love bombs should also make you suspicious than anything else, stroking your ego, but you should really be keeping your guard up.
@@anoushkamarcin No need to apologize, since it's your not at fault, I grew up with people like this around me, didn't understand when I was a kid, but I do now. She gave so many clues away, trying to hurt me and make me jealous was a major one, she even looked at my face to check how I was reacting - it's deliberate, didn't work, all it did was she me what kind of person she really is. Your right, run away, get out of dodge ASAP!!!!!!
Just can't be with them the constant up's and down's the lack of intimacy the lack of understanding the friendship's they keep, the silence the lies, the deception none of these build healthy relationship's so why would any healthy minded person want to live in this messy unruly destructive relationship time to let go and let God deal with it. God hold's the Power and the Glory In God I Trust God can break the chain's that bind us hallelujah amen ❤️🙏❤️🙏❤️🙏✨
I have a criminal protection order against my ex husband of 31 yrs for assaulting me Dec 5th . I kicked him out immediately and filed for divorce 6 days later. He couldn’t respect a regular restraining order. Called 58 times, 326 texts and showed up at the door 4 times. I got hi for intimidation. I’ve been divorced for 2 months yesterday. We have a family together. It’s been very difficult but I’m happier than I have been in a long time. I’ve been incredibly ill for a decade and I’m regaining my health ❤
Their biggest mistake is presuming you never had a breaking point , let alone the strength to ever walk ! You instantly get downgraded to NOTHING ! Everything you ever shared is written off , and you are the new public enemy number one . They will begin the smear and seek revenge . Luckily other people aren't QUITE as easily fooled , and will see through their hate campaign , helped in part by the ever growing awareness of NPD ! ❤💪💋
I was done anyway but the final nail in the coffin was when the police turned up at my front door in a dawn raid because he'd been looking at child 🌽 😢😢 Im so gutted and disgusted
Well well well. She is now creating fake accounts to stalk me and then deletes em when I don't answer them immediately. I realize her power over me was xesual.nothing else. I'm at another level now and she lost control over me. There must be women who can love and not use and abuse.
When my ex narcissistic monster realised they lost in trying to get away with stealing wealth 👀 gang stalked began. the death spells began.. paid a gang to off me.. when all this failed.. they tried to get back... and God Said No, Not a Chance in hell.. I will stay single until true love comes my way 🤗 Amen 🙏🏾✝️🙊🌹❤️💛💚
I know a person that left a narcissist because of a family situation,and 4 days later the narcissist started a relationship with a woman they met in a bar,And would call the x daily when new women wasn’t aware,assuring his love but just wanted to see where this new relationship goes so hang there until I come home st
A friend of mine pointed out how manipulative this girl was, so I started manipulating her to unfold the cards, little by little. In the end I triggered her when she realised I had her figured out. Mind you, I knew this person for years, so there were nice moments and I used to care for her. I went nuclear on her, the other day because I snapped after 3 months since she unblocked me. She tried to test the ground 10 months after the discard, so I exposed her. Don't recommend it. It can escalate.
You are right no matter how bad theyve done to you they have the strength to tell you you will never forget them...thats frue I will never forget her and what she had done to me If I forget I will allow her to come back. We forgive them but never forget.
Bang on this is what my son is going thou me as a dad it really stresses me out what she has done to him I love my 2 boys I brought them up on my own as a single dad and did t want to see him like this it breaks my heart and she couldn’t care less a bout him just what she can get narcissis are nasty people who only care a bout them slef
I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's a nightmare and my dad was stressed out when I was going through the same thing. I hope everything works out for all of you, so you can heal
Thank you, so much I got a better understanding of how these people think and it unfortunate because they are causing people so much harm. I just want to thank you again, because I truly believe that pain shared is pain lesson.
Shes now starting to accuse me of sexual abuse of our 6 year old, since now I dont react when provoked, answer her calls or texts unless a direct q about our son, and ive lost 50lbs in 3 years, bought a house while she is still in the divorce apt I pay for via child support and alimony. Alimony ends in Jan. Yipee!
I just noticed you have a lot of male watchers and Richard Grannon and Sam Viknan have a lot of female watchers or supporters…. How can we get the men and woman together that are healing from mean people?? I wish there was a forum where This could happen. Two, educated on the topic, people that want healthy habits only in a relationship. How do we find each other?❤❤❤
It doesn't matter the gender in this . Both Richard Grannon and Professor Sam Vaknin are highly qualified and credible experts . This is what matters . Anyone and everyone is setting up channels on being experts in narcissism. Richard in particular shoots down the 'love bombing theory". They don't always love bomb. This is a shared fantasy space and both the narcissist and other person share it and idolise each other. Its not important for both sexes to be in an identified space. Its only important that people individually heal. And. Only listen to qualified experts. I only know of three.
Finally got my first actual crush post narc abuse cycle. I still need to talk to my therapist to see if I should pursue it just yet but honestly I'm ready to ask this person to have a rice bowl or something with me and just talk for about 30-60 mins and see how we vibe, and I'm prepared to accept no for an answer as well. I guess I'm moving on with my life. They wanna meet new people for new supply, and I wanna meet new people to form healthy connections and make friends and maybe have a healthy romantic relationship.
1000% Truth. I had a woman so I believe out of 6mnths hassle Me for No meet. Yet all she wanted to do was text. Went from free spirit love bombing to one word communication. 2brief. phone calls. and whispers. I showed up to meet and geuse what ? excuse to no meet.
I’m still around , I’ll see what will be , I’m learning and keep my eyes open . But anything will happen I’m ready . It’s a sad thing that the end is not I’m expecting for . I’m hanging around , I still feel that connection in him . He said one time someone must give in . So he is playing game and will see .
A few months after the narc discarded me and threw me away while spending every waking moment with the new/old supply, he said "you never asked me to cone back, not once." I told him why would I you have wanted this for many many years so I am giving you your out. I don't know what he thought was going to happen after he abandoned me. Like you said, the threshold was reached. The train ride through bizarre-o-world needed to stop so I could atleast tuck and roll.💩
@@JanetMitchell-y8i unbelievable for him to say that!!! What goes through their minds?? Mine said similar, I walked away due to her cheating and lying and she said I was so cold to her when she reached out the first time…….what did she honestly expect??!!! They think you will just sweep it under the carpet and it’s all forgotten
After I brokeup with my ex, she said that she changed a lot because of me. In the beginning of our relationship I talked about being genuine, and that a relationship only lasts if both parts are able to be happy on their own. And that I wanted a long term relationship. I feel like she used this adaptive change of behavior, trying to keep me as long as possible. Our relationship lasted 5 months
Nothing could be more accurate than the fact the she spoke about in the video that as soon as we start to move forward and let go of them, they come back or atleast try to hoover and become someone as 1% good and this has happened with me many times and I got back in. As soon as I started my life well, stopped thinking about that person and was okay with my life, she popped up like a notification 😂 and this happened 2-3 times but now we haven’t been talking for 2 months and she’s giving me silent treatment and I’m also at distance…
@@michelledale3334 she has many supplies I know some of them personally but this time I confronted her and it was badddd😂 it hit her so hard that maybe that’s why she’s not coming forward lol
Yeah they're like you're done. You're done. You're done. You know they want you dead😢 And so many women go through domestic violence and don't make it through. I was stalked by my ex-husband. It was so scary. I disappeared, changed my last name and try to make another that he still showed up and at my door and found me. I went to a shelter. He still managed to call me. He use another woman's voice act like she was my sister and then he got on the phone. And oh my gosh that terrified me and I didn't want to tell my family everywhere. I turned it feel like you was showing up because he remembered all the places that we used to go together so he would show up there. So now you have to change everything you do so you don't even see this person. If you're in the same city with them. I mean this gets so satanic and it's unbelievable. It's like a damn movie. It's just sickening
How do you make them leave you alone? I went no contact 10 months ago and it drove the narcissict out of their everloving mind! Arson and cat murder were next on the agenda. I don't hate this person, just want to be left alone. Does it ever stop?
You stay strong 💪 and don’t give in. Think about yourself and your well-being. Every time you reach out you go back to square one , the beginning! Once you get a few weeks under your belt it gets easier.. It will be over soon. 1 day at a time, you will feel better soon . You can do it.. 🤗💕
narcissists are awful but what is also horrible is when people choose to accept and abide by the ways of the narcissist. I blame society, mostly. if society says it's ok, it is very difficult to push back
I am never coming back! Why should I? My narcissist ex-boyfriend does not care or has no respect for others or me so I refuse to be around someone who is not real! I am not interested in being abused ! A narcissist will never understand why people will not tolerate their abusive behavior and actions against others who have been hurt by them!
My wife was having a classic doctor affair. I had no problem with the divorce. They married soon after we divorced. Now they are divorced 😂. Now she wants to get back together. I simply did not respond to her dm. I'm 46, and I'm the happiest person I know. I wish I felt like typing more. There are some very funny moments to all this. I need to put a video up😅
My ex narcissistic boyfriend dumped me and went to his shelve to find the next victim which was a woman he cheated with on his childrens mother and he put on his Facebook post that he was engaged and after 4 months she dumped him and then the hoovering starts.These crazy demonic and delusional people seriously need help
@@puertoricanprincess7035 worst thing ever, i just block my narcissistic wife, yesterday, doing express divorce next week I'm done with the disrespect, deception and energy draining dynamic, it was horrible, She is 22 and i am 29, did not know ppl like were so design for evil purposes.
Oh no! They ain't got to look for new people. They already made so many new friends when they were in a relationship with you and so when you weren't around people saw you two together. So then he talked about you like oh she's giving me problems or he's giving me problems. But I'm just trying to hang in there for the family or you know whatever excuse he's trying to use that he's saying I'm hanging in there with her. But if I find somebody better you know you know what I mean. Maybe me and you could talk. You know. Can I get your number. And then that's how the other person gets sucked in and he has so many or she has so many old friends that their bedroom buddies so they're sleeping around with them when he's sick of you and that's that's what they do. I'm telling you so it's just roundy aroundy dosey doe just a foolish game and never grown up and it's just pathetic
They act just like a 3 to 5-year-old who throws temper tantrums there’s never any resolve there’s never any solution or answers. Just you can see the rage buildup in them so that they can shut you down and shut the conversation down and sweep everything they’ve done under the rug like a child.
Mine texted me after thirteen years no contact... after leaving me for a woman from a dating site whom he had told he was single...i genuinly hand on heart would rather live alone until death than even talk to him via text let alone anything else..they are bizarre and warped.
