Why Cats 2019 is a DISGRACE to Humanity (And How To Fix It) 

When Taylor Swift said "I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams", she was actually warning us.

something I thought of was that, if they wanted Mistoffelees to have this big character arc, why not make HIM the main character? I mean we could say that he wants to be reborn so he can be better at magic and Macavity could even be a foil to him! Heck even have Macavity pull the "you and I are not so different" thing if you want to!

I think the biggest problem with the adaptation of a spectacle such as Cats is not having a director that enjoys and value the spectacle. Someone who loves the dancing and singing would certainly make a phenomenal job adapting cats to movie format. I'm sure its possible. And we would have been discussing about it with a lot less monster negatives to talk about.

The only way one could get the Jennyanydots costume change to translate decently would be putting her in loose pet clothes, or finding something other than unzipping on screen, maybe have it be a more practical effect. Have her slide under a cloth covered table, or even have an Anastasia dress transformation.

Here's my head canon for Grizzabella. Why did she choose this particular night to join the party on multiple occasions? Has she done this every ball ever since she's been cast out? Probably not so the reason why she's so desperate to be let back in on this night is because shes dying. When she lies down in the middle of the junkyard, shes accepting her fate that's where she chose to take her final breath because thats where she was in her prime. Everyone else turns away because they cant chase her off since she's too weak to move at this point. They cant touch her because that would be letting her back into the clan. So they just sat and waited for her to die. It wasnt until Jemima starts singing that brings back hope and what little strength she has left to declare her final wish. She never wanted to be reborn, she just wanted her clan to love her again.

Sideways explained in his essay that yes, the cast of CATS did sing live for their movie, and it turned into even more of a dumpster fire than Les Mis.

How does the thumbnail look significantly less disturbing than the actual shot from the movie?

I should mention that Jim Henson’s creature shop also worked on the turtle suits for the 1990 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film, so if they could make such beautiful films as Labrynth, Dark Crystal and TMNT then you know they could make Cats, so great idea with the suggestion of using practical effects

Re: romance in the Cats movie, if we're keeping Victoria as the protagonist we could give her a love interest in the form of Plato - he's the cat she dances with in the Jellicle Ball in the musical in a section that's sometimes called "the mating dance" so I'd say it's kinda canon already. We could have Plato as a deputy to Munkustrap, he'd be the one to find Victoria and take her to the Jellicles, he'd be by her side the entire movie since Munkustrap has other responsibilities and can't stick to the one new cat the entire night (he's helping a few other cats in their songs after all)

It's pretty much solid that Misto is one of the youngest adult jellicles (a lot of his behavior in the show is similar to the kittens', and he's one of the first cats to run up to check grizabella out like he doesn't recognize her) and canonly magic, it's absolutely possible to get a healthy balance of "sweet silly little guy" and "badass magician who knows what he's doing", bc he has that personality in the 1998 movie, in Jennyanydots's song, he initially thinks Munkustrap is going to sing abt him and gets visibly embarrassed when it's not the case and gets shooed off to sit with the other kittens (who all start poking at him it's very cute), and once Old Deut is brought back he literally leaps into his arms to hug him, he's supposed to be cute and funny but the movie makes it an "adorkable" thing and it doesnt work

Never send a bad director to do a furry's job

I've been seeing ads for cat litter where the cat people look 1000% better than the 2019 movie. Imagine if the Jellicles looked like the ones in the Slide cat litter ads. The cats in those ads actually look pretty cute.

“I am here to tell you about the gospel of magical Mr. Mistoffeles.”

Cats as a stage show works, because it transports us to this whimsical fantasy world. Tom "Everything needs to be super realistic" Hooper missed this very simple but crutial point of it. And every failing of this movie seems to come from this single misunderstanding.

I like your fixes, but I'd make Jemima/Sillabub the main character since she's the one who actually sings "Memory" with Grizzabella. I also like to headcanon that she's Macavity's daughter with Demeter, the cat who's always really jumpy about him in the original musical, so you've got that connection as well. Maybe play it where she's coming of age, bc she's the youngest of the cats, and feeling the teenage angst about her father being Macavity and just doesn't want to deal with it anymore, idk. If you vibe with the headcanon, this could also possibly make Grizabella her grandmother, since I think Grizabella is Demeter and Bombalurina's mother, and she doesn't think it's fair that the older cat is being excluded when getting a second chance is the whole point of the Jellicle Choice. Maybe she gets into a fight with the older cats about it and runs off, which accidentally leads to Macavity being able to do his dastardly deeds. Jemima feels really guilty about this, and she sings "Memory" with Grizabella, calling back to when she sang her version of it earlier. Something, something, the A plot and B plot converge, Grizabella is welcomed back and chosen for the Heavyside Lair, and Jemima comes to her with herself. This got away from me... So that's how I'd do it.

I respect your opinion about that Cats should Stay a live musical movie instead of animation cus IT would lose the specialness of the amazing perform art/dancing...... Buuuuuuuttttt i do really wish we gotten the animated movie anyways Just to see how more surreal and charachter animation driven IT would become, plus the art style gives me good don Bluth and Disney Bronze Age/Dark age vibes

Sheesh, this movie is hard to look at. I know there are movies that get criticized because of the "Uncanny Valley", but this takes the cake. Your edits look great and your ideas on how the movie could've been better are great as well.

I completely forgot that this disaster existed until this. You rekindled past trauma. Damn you.

Everybody wants to be a cat! Unless it's this kind of cat!🙀

victoria's actress in the plays: TENDONS.....B-GONE!

What I would have done if I were the director was make it so that the cats look like, well, cats when a human is looking. Like in the first scene of the musical where a car headlight shines on someone. In the headlight, they’re just a hissing cat. But as soon as the headlight is off of them, they’re a human in the cat costume.

If they changed Misto's personality to be cuter the coulda at least made it easier to look at him 😐

They done are magical boy dirty Sutch a Shame :(

It´s a disgrace for cats too.

Good video but the part where you explained what the musical is about is really really similar to sideways’ video 😂 I know there’s only limited ways to explain a storyline but that really stuck out to me as a fellow sideways enjoyer. Otherwise I loved the video 🙌😸 keep it up

Your version of The Old Gumbie Cat is great!

Yeesh, getting some serious Cat in the Hat vibes from this movie. Mike Meyer's costume gave me nightmares growing up

28:20 Mr Jacob Brent is the best Mistoffelees in the world and it does not help that we hear Mr John Partridge hit those notes beautifully in the back!!!!!😭😭😭😭💖💖💖💖💖💖 what I would do to meet both of these men and thank them😭😭😭😭😭💖💖💖💖💖💖

i think this movie should of been fully animated likely the designs wouldn't be so uncanny. and my mother was in middle school when it came out and grew up with friends obesed with it.

Good job, Jinlong! You made some great points, as well as suggesting some very good potential fixes.

Sideways is the goat. I am glad he is coming back

I loved Misto and RTT and most of the main cats in the musical, but this movie suckd A, S, S so strong. I keep watching these bits to see if there was something ANYTHING good... and yeah, the tap dancing... if only we were allowed to watch and enjoy it properly.

Why did a 3yo vid about a cursed movie hit my feed? IDK, but I do love anyone dunking on Cats. Thx, algo! Great vid, subbed.

Listen I somewhat agree with you on Robbie Fairchild as Misto instead of Laurie Fairchild, but counterpoint Corey John Snide. Corey John Snide Understudied for the role of Mistoffelees on Broadway and although he was in CATS (2019) they cast him as a nameless background dancer instead of Misto for some reason. (Pretty sure the clip you used of the Conjuring Turns was literally of Corey John Snide). Seriously Hooper, you had someone who covered for Mistoffelees on Broadway in your movie and instead of having him play Misto you had him play a nameless background dancer.

Wow, I never thought about how Grizabella and Victoria were mirrors for each other. That's a cool observation.

I like how the description sounds like a fucking horror movie.... or maybe it is?

Your ideas for the designs of the characters does look better. Much better.

I never though about the cats singing to compete to go to the "heaven" I always though they're singing for our sake. Like they invited us to the party and want to introduce the family to us. The choice then lands on the cat that deserves it the most regardless of the song they sang that night. But maybe I got it wrong. I LOVE the musical because of the energy, catchy songs and clear family bonds they display. The 2019 movie...not so much. It is not just creepy, that could be excused if the songs and the new plot made sense. I mean look at Skimbleshanks song. That one is cool to the point you actually forget about the shitty CGI (mostly). It just made the cats be assholes to each other, narcissistic and not very likable. They also got most of the looks wrong. Grizabela is supposed to be old, ugly, rough, sad, sick I would say, the coat torn and tangled. It's in the lyrics! And what did they do? Made her fucking pretty and shiny and gave her disgusting running snot....just....I hate this movie so much....sorry for the late rant As for Victoria and Misto, they ARE seen together a lot in the background of the film musical. Does is excuse the movie shipping? Iiiiidk. I like the Misto x Tugger ship more...

You know what, Cats is the type of musical that could work with an animated format. I think that Spielberg tried to adapt the og poem it in the 80s bit couldn't do it.

What truly annoys me about this movie is the size of the cats. In some shots, they look 6 inches high and in others, they actually look closer to cats standing on their hind legs, about 18 inches to 2 feet tall for the adult cats. They literaally made Skimbleshanks and friends look slightly larger than the cockroaches! It annoys the heck out of me that their sizes compared to surroundings lacked any and all consistency!

16:05 but I miss Mr John Partridges take on the character that was my favorite thing how The Rum Tum Tugger is the character for the adults like little kids wouldn't be laughing during his song but like the adults will die🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I know I died many many times in disbelief do I say they should have toned down his unique personality no he's perfect that way!!!!!😭

They need to fix a body of a cats of mouths and nose from the movie cats 2019. And they look like a human body mix cat body.

I dont think humans made this. Actually, i dont even think humanity is normal anymore

Skimbleshanks is probably my favourite act in the musical so hearing that it sometimes gets cut for time reasons hurt my soul 😭 (Though I would assume that The Battle of the Pekes and the Pollicles or Growltiger's Last Stand gets cut before it.) Robbie Fairchild is a great choice for Munkustrap considering all the stuff he does throughout the musical. He's there the whole time, sings so many parts, dances for most of them and then the entire dance-fight with Macavity. They just had to cast another dancer who's just as great for Mistoffelees. The same for Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, just cutting their joint cartwheel was another criminal offense. Regarding story changes, I like the idea of having the kittens be the POV characters for the audience who Munkustrap explains the rules of the Jellicle Ball to. You wouldn't need to give Victoria a tragic backstory, it'd just be her first time attending which makes it super exciting. (Sidenote: The Jellicle Ball is not a competition in the musical. It wouldn't make sense to be one. Most of the principal cats (with the exception of Gus) have no reason to want to be picked to be reborn, they're in the prime of their life and happy. Old Deuteronomy isn't even there to see most of their songs so they wouldn't work as auditions. They're just fun introductions to a bunch of cool cats. The Jellicle Ball is a big party and celebration of their community and the Jellicle Choice at the end is a part of that where the most deserving cat is chosen to get their next life, logically an old cat who's lived most of their life or a deeply unhappy one with their current life. Some of the songs can be interpreted as the cats wondering who could be picked (mainly how Munkustrap introduces Jennyanydots) but not as competing.) Since Cats is about the entire ensemble I'd try to not shrink the focus down to one single cat as the protagonist. Grizabella with Memory should stay the emotional throughline of the story but she's not there for the most part so for another character the audience can emotionally latch unto I'd actually pick Demeter (who they almost completely forgot about in the film). She's the first on stage in the musical so the opening shot of the film could be her fleeing from Macavity or having a flashback to when she fled from him. She has this established dark history with being a victim of Macavity and it'd be really easy to expand on. This would also serve to make Macavity a much scarier villain, in general he'd want to hurt the Jellicle cats whenever possible but specifically he'd try to get at Demeter. You could show the excitement and spectacle of the Jellicle Ball through the eyes of the kittens and other cats but have somewhat of a shadow hanging over it through Demeter's anxiety and Macavity's threat. Her I want song could be about wanting to forget the hurt in her past and enjoy her life again without constantly looking over her shoulder or avoiding every potential risk. The audience would have a reason to cheer her on during the Ball to enjoy the antics of the other cats and join in on the fun. Here's also where I would put the romance subplot (if we want one), namely between her and Munkustrap, that follows along with her arc of moving on from her trauma. I would still have the kittens be the ones to invite Grizabella back into the community (the duo of Jemima and Victoria like it is in the musical) but I'd draw a parallel between Grizabella and Demeter (with the half understanding, half scared way she reacts to her in the musical) that makes it significant that they in particular reconcile depending on what you'd choose for Grizabella to have done to get ostracized. I'd also try to put focus on the community of the cats in general showing how much they care for and help each other (as the musical does). Have most of the cats be there for the whole thing and show their personalities and relationships in their interactions even when they're not the focus, in the background and the occasional side shots (like the '98 version does so well). That would take a little of the randomness out of the principal songs because instead of going "who's this now?" you'd recognize the cats being sung about. That would also highlight the contrast between the group and how alone Grizabella and Macavity are (Bombalurina would be back to her musical version on Demeter's side, obviously) and improve the audience's understanding of why Grizabella wants to be part of the group again so badly (showing her lingering around looking in from the outside). There's so much you could do, honestly, and I love hearing about everyone's ideas of what to do in a proper genuine adaptation that are so much better than whatever this was.

Also Steven McRae does both tap and ballet at the same time AND SINGS LIVE!!!

One idea I think would be hilarious but also a bit more modern and thus not fit the 80's feel of Cats, would be having some of the jellicle cats have those camera collar things put on them by their owners because they want to find out what weird shit their cats are getting up to when they go outside the house, and when they get to the junkyard, the others find them weird but when the camera cats explain what they are, the jellicles find it amusing. That way having the 4th wall break feels more natural, because its just cats addressing the camera. Sort of them vlogging jellicle life to their owners. Obviously there are still flaws with this idea but I also think it'd be a cute idea. tbh i dont feel they need a main character per se since there are 'kitten' characters. have it where they are having the rules explained to them, having these other jellicle cats explained to them, etc, because these young characters maybe havent met them beore or need a reminding of who they are. i feel like there were so many ways to go around certain things regarding the main character problem that just didnt get indulged on

Always a joy to see your breakdown of a truly awful film that destroyed so much potential and as a fellow theatre geek, I agree with those film alterations and think this could have been truly great if someone who had more than 3 brain cells directed it but these are just fantasies now.

how are you so small, this video is really good for somebody with less than 1k subs

The designs for that film are so bad they’re good.

Oh, I don't know about what the fanbase has differently, but I think Mistoffelees and Victoria do make a great couple.

Jinlong, Someone Should Hire You To Supervise Or Direct Some Broadway Or Musicals Shows. 😎👍

Honestly, Cats is one of those musicals that has intrigued me for a long time, but I also feel like the jellicle cats are a bit... death cult-y? I don't know if I'd want to get involved with them if I was a cat, to be honest.

Well, I will say, that I love to rage about this movie, but I will continue to pretend, that it doesn't exist like some seasons, which should never come into existence ... ... YEAH I LOOK AT YOU PSYCHO-PASS SEASON 2.

MA! MA there's a bunch of weird ass cats singing about how much their lives suck, but not really attempting to better their situations! I think it's some sort of freaky kitty cat cult or something!

Do you know why all the musical numbers are sung by cats that aren’t the cats the songs are about??? BECAUSE A PERSON CANT SING AND DANCE LIKE THAT AT THE SAME TIME! And Cats is equal parts a musical and a dance number.

If Catty B was in this movie it would be a completely different movie I'll say that

I love the play, the movie is a nightmare

for that nya.....the council has granted thee....but one, singular, yike

Well at least we can say it is a live action cat movie unlike the "live action" Lion King. XD

U get chills at memories part two

I think Movie Sonic said IT best even as a "Warning" to us all during that year Movie Sonic: Um? Meow?" I'll be honestly with ya; I never really grew up with the original Cats The Musial as a kid but did watched Joseph: King Of Dreams Instead but was aware of the various/parodies/spoofs from different medias from cartoons and was still curious unlike any other curious cat since I'm more of a dog person type but glad I still avoided this before virus that It was (unlike last year which Is still going no) but also liked some of your Ideas but personality I kinda wished we just have one fully animated Instead like Disney or Warner Bros' classic animations. But hey It could've been worst; The Lion Kin g(reboot) *STILL* could've have these designs lying around Instead and could've been must worst for a different cursed timeline that we live In.

You do impressions/accents very well.

I enjoyed the 1998 version. This new version I can’t stand the design. Not all cats have smooth body hugging fur. I am with you on the need for practical effects. I don’t think the newer film really needed the kidnapping plot. Pointless. Macavity is an evil cat. His appearance in the film really doesn’t work for me. Color wise, calico cat. Make Macavity’s fur long, and almost porcupine like in appearance. Where was the fight scene between Munkustrap & Macavity? In the musical all the cats are scared, even at the mention of his name. That tension is missing. Rum Tum Tugger needed to sing HIS songs. Mistoffelees was handled horribly in this movie version. So was the twins. Where was the famous cartwheel maneuver?should of kept it to the junkyard setting. Cut the budget down from building all those sets that made the cats look tiny.

In your rewrite Since victoria has learned the true value of who and why certain cats deserver to be choosen over herself ship with Munkustrap because we know hes going to be be their leader and that he doesnt want to be the jelical cat. They both will share wisdom and be great leaders a power couple for sure

Justice for the Cats fandom! I feel like im the only one here

Jonique'a Smith:Hey! That's the line from Beauty and the Beast!😃

You did a wonderful job making her part sound better... that was amazing... me and my daughters really liked it

I saw Cats at the Winter Garden in early 1983 when it was poppin. The movie version in 1998 was perfection. NO REASON TO REMAKE IT. This CGI garbage was nothing less than UGLY.

I feel like the problem with Victoria being the protagonist (I think that's how you spell it) is because she's played by an adult woman Victoria is this curious young kitten if they were to got a child actor to play Victoria or created a new character perhaps a kitten was born into the tribe and is learning all these things about the jellicle cats it could have helped this problem!!!!

I gotta say; after watching a reaction video and your video, I don't want to know ANY MORE about the 2019 trashing of the original.

Jonique'a Smith:Victoria and Munkustrap are such a happy couple.😊🤗💖💖😻😻😽😽

So excited. This is gonna suck hard

Isn't Tom the director of The Kings Speach? Just know what you're good at and what you shouldn't touch... I think if you really want a protagonist, which is not really fitting for cats, don't make it a heros journey thing, but someone for the audience to introduce the world and themes to. Not Victoria with a whole background story as a new character, but all of the kittens (include Jemima!). Let them experience their first jellicle ball but already as part of the jellicle cats. So they have all the needed wonder, swoon for Tugger, learn about Macavity like in the stage show and try to figure out what's the deal with Grizabella, but still they know lyrics, dance at the ball and we get the feeling of community. We see how Jemima realizes Old D wants Grizabella as his choice and Victoria beeing the one touching her. But it would feel more organically and would get not too much attention, cause the jellicle cats as a group are the real protagonist and we won't lose the vibe.

It's upsetting because if they had traditionally animated it, it might have been tolerable.

I've got problems with how they changed the music, dumbed down the lyrics, and racially-color washed the characters. There's seriously a white = good, black = bad thing going on. "Macavity is a GINGER cat"! It says so right in his lyrics, Swift even sings it that way, but then they black-washed him for being the "villain". Just.... Arrrrg!!! I'm also annoyed they took that sexy duet out when Tugger blends in with Munkustrap for Old Deuteronomy. That makes my ears and brain happy, but- not in this movie. I totally agree about the botching of the Skimble's dance. That man is FIRE and they.... just.... -might as well have been staring at a wall for all the screen time they gave their dancers. Anyway, thanks for making this. I've got my own ramble of steam to blow off about this movie, but you covered a lot of the main points. Cheers!

So true ！

Everybody wants to be a cat. More like: Everybody wants to be a lizard or Everybody wants to be a Dragon or Everybody wants to be a dog

Oh my goodness

Great video! That movie made me cringe!

I heard Taylor Swift. I like some of hers song

Much like Phantom of the Opera I had so much hope for this movie. XD

10:33 Catty Dench 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Creepy.

30:31

90+10=100

My choir director made us watch it and it was just . . . 🤢

I allways assumed that Rum-Tum-Tugger and Mr. Mistoffelees were brothers.... All the interaction between them sort of makes sense if Tugger's the older, dominant brother, and mr. M are the shy and timid younger brother hiding in the shadow of his more confident brother while he's building up his own confidence. And in the stage mucical you can clearly see he's not really as shy and insecure that he tries to appear to be. And when the time comes for his moment to shine. it's Tugger who gives him the final boost of confidence to REALLY steal the show and bring back Old Deuteronomy. The film version really ruined the coolest cat ever.....

I don't think TS Eliot or Webber meant Mr Mystophelees and Rum Tum Tom to actually be gay cats. They are just cats. The very gay narrative I think is a bit forced. Leaving room for such a narrative in subtle way is way more entertaining, btw. After all these are CATS.

Bad form on the hetero hate. Me personally I don't give a shit about relationships that are not part of the story or genre. But the way you worded it is pretty much how the Tumblr cult operate, how dare straight people like me exist. I caught the back pedal, but still, not cool.