Why Does My Ex Hate Me? (And What to Do About It) - Clay Andrews 

Thanks for watching my video. If you'd like to learn more about building a positive emotional connection with your ex, I've got you covered over here: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-8pM1PxNaYBI.html

I ask myself this EVERY SINGLE DAY! My ex hates me and he doesn’t have a REAL REASON. He has this hatred against me... when I’m being the SWEETEST, NICEST, loving person... he’s negative to me. Every single day I was fighting to show him that I care & love him. I reminded him. Everything in his head he hated. He hated my phone calls, my texts, he said me checking on him was to much, going out all the time was to much. Everything I did was TO DAMN MUCH. When I leave him alone and come back he’s already pissed off. Damn! Good video! Glad he left me. He was stressful as hell!

My ex-fiance went from loving me one day to breaking up with me seemingly out of no where and then they went from loving me to HATING me with all their guts. They first broke up with me and I begged them not to leave and then they ignored me for months. Then when we finally talked, they were meaner to me than anyone has ever been to me in my entire life. I was super nice but they still kept attacking me for things I never did. They just flat out hated me and attacked me on my looks from to me as a person. Then they just wouldn't let me talk to them. To this day, nearly 3 years later.. none of our mutual friends speak to them anymore because they were just so awful to me and none of us know to this day why they broke up with me. So I wish this video had helped, but this video implies they're even willing to still talk to you. Or they would be willing to listen to you. It's hard to be nice when they are attacking you in every way possible and attacking you for your personal looks or your personality when you didn't even do anything wrong and you know you didn't.

The only way to get their attention is to stop talking to them, stop letting them have visibility on your life, through friends and family, delete them and move on. It worked for me. It’s never too late, move forward with your life, my ex contacted me after about 12 months... all the normal break up dramas and emotions, mistakes were made.. but after time it fades. Love will always find its way but you need to understand your value, they can’t mistreat you and you can’t stop your life.

No contact actually gives them time to miss you, but messaging them when they’re angry with you no matter what you say and do it will never ever end well. Especially if your ex is stubborn… I spent 8 years with my ex and I told him to leave on a argument and he did but I told him I would move out he could stay here. But he decided to go to his mothers house and completely ignore the fact we private rent. He completely left me… I’m so broken But trying to contact them is going to push them further away

I decide to give up my boyfriend because he have already girlfriend, I felt very emotional 😢,he call me sometimes but it turns to arguing and arguing.

Hey Clay! I’ve only been watching your videos for 4 days because that’s how long it has been since she broke up with me. And with your tactics, it took me only these 4 days and she already is back with me. Your content is quality and if guys really do love their exs’ then they need your advice to get them back. Thank you so much!!!

She hates me because I told her the truth, I was brutally honest infact, and she thinks that I did that because I deliberately wanted to hurt her

This is so true . Especially when you react and act immature towards them . Even if they do things to trigger you. You both get confused . I got really triggered from this behavior from my ex - he didn’t know how to approach me . And how I would react - he tested me and subconsciously tested me - I always failed the test - continued to contact him after his anxiety and curiosity died down calling me… when he used to reach out - I used to whine - talk about the past etc - negative emotions. Killing the romantic feelings over n over . Stay away and see what happens.

Thanks for the wise words Clay! I only wish I had seen this video 5 months ago. Better late then never though :)

My ex girlfriend broke up with me 3 weeks ago because of her anxiety issues. Even if I begged, we were more or less okay the next two weeks, she was the one contacting me, she was sweet, caring... and then on Tuesday she texts me "Sorry, I need to recover my space." When I told her "it's fine, I know you are not okay, I'm here for you if you need me, don't worry about our relationship/me having feelings..." she replied "I don't think I will want to try again". At that moment I told her "hey, we can try in the future, but now is not the moment, focus on yourself first". And then, boom, "I don't love you enough to try". And since then she didn't contact me (I didn't contact her either) and when we saw today she just said "hi" and ignored me. What happened?? Is she just pushing me away so I move on? She lied when we broke up and told me "I really love you but I can't take this reponsability right now"? Is her anxiety playing tricks on her mind??

This is the most incredible & informative relationship video that I have ever seen. I am going through this positive pull back with my -ex fiancé now. This explains how he treats me. I left him initially but in his mind, he has made me out to be the bad guy. Surprisingly, he did remember my b-day on Jan. 7 but I haven't heard anything from him since...really feeling helpless not knowing what to do. He has wanted to forget me and move on but he said the more he tries to forget me, the more he loves me. He made another strange remark that he is the one who is suffering the most.

My ex broke it off 3 months ago after 5 yrs of being together servral factors lead to the breakup I was working long hours and didn't take time for her I had a gambeling and meth addiction which after loosing everything and hitting bottom and getting drug across that bottom. I was able to get up dust myself off and start over. I changed everything including my career. I've been sober for over 3 months and no longer gamble. Also I had a friend that was female that she was sure I was having relations with but I wasnt. So lots of bad choices on my end and I can see why she couldn't put up with it. This has been an awakening for me and I realize how much she loves me and what she went through and stayed and tried so hard but finally was hurt one to many times. We didn't speak for the first two month very much as I was trying to get myself sober and together. I lost a lot of self esteem and self worth and confidence. While on the bottom. This last month I have been trying to convince her that I'm done with that life and that I don't want to lose her. If you've ever known an addict these words have been said and heard many times. She said she wants to see me stay consistent and doesn't know if it's salvageble. There was a Friday two weeks ago she called me for a booty call it was a great night and I tried not to do and convincing during that night for a few days she acted like she was coming around and I think I was smothering her and trying to force it and she backed off again. I found out she started seeing someone else and last week went by to get some things she was cold and indifferent and he called while I was sitting with her and said she would be over later that she couldn't talk right now . I was mad " Oh I see what's going on here! Let him know when I find him I'm going to beat his ass!" I left and was crushed I cried for awhile and thought about it and wrote her a note telling her I was sorry for my emotional state and knew she needed space and I was stressing her out so I would back off and leave her alone and that I wanted her to be happy so if he made her happy I will be done. She sent a text the next day saying thank you for finally understanding and that the letter was sweet. We had a few good talks and I let my emotions override when she said she was going to need more time and she wasn't going to stop seeing him. I sent hateful texts and posts to FB trying to make her mad enough to leave me alone because I didn't want to be hurt any more. I realized my decision was stupid after I calmed down and the next day sent an apology letter and told her I would wire her $100 to make up for it as I knew she was struggling. I sent $150 and told her I wanted no contact so I could work on personal growth and if she ever felt like she loved me enough to let me prove to her I could care for her and be there for and love her to call but not to call if she was with someone else. I said I love you and she said I love you too and I hung up. It's been 3 days and I'm holding my ground but have a fear I won't get that call what do I do?

Great content...absolutely true...currently experiencing this right now. I try to be calm, and make her laugh etc.....even though I am dying inside and angry, I try to be positive....she seems to be reaching out more for random reasons... :)

My transgressions came in the form of impatience on my part… I wanted to move things forward faster than she was ready to.. I was attached to outcome and pushed for things that I wanted when I wanted them… in my mind I was excited, this was it.. she was the one… for a time she was right there with me… we both said forever, we both said we were each other’s person.. we looked out for each other and we’re very nurturing and loving and flirtatious and it was deep and powerful and beautiful… I told her I got the ring… she dumped me… now she has told me that I am not listening, I am assuming, I don’t even ask or consider how she feels, I repeatedly crossed boundaries while we were together… we were no contact for about a month… I broke it to ask her about a post she made on social media, which started a whole backlash.. and now I’m pretty much a jerk who bulldozes boundaries… I mean I hear you when you say no contact is not the way but like………… am I just royally ruining our connection?

She took my phone caught me talking to other women & blocked me everywhere. Now I'm haunted by all the memories we shared.

What if her mom is munipulating her and she took my son. I want them back

He always hated me apparently ❤

Well, mine broke up with me out of nowhere, kinda rubbed it in my face by sending me sad music videos to listen to then when I went to her house to return an item I was called a creep and blocked

2 years ldr, 1 month no contact, and when i reach out, she wish me dead, she said that she will never chnage her mind she will dance on my grave if i die!! I'm going to let her go this is tomuch even if i do love her so much

My ex broke up with me due to arguments silly ones actually no cheating or lying and he said he hates me etc😔💔

My ex tells people I accused her of cheating and emotionally abusing her for the entire time we were together but I have proof in pictures neither happened and that she was happy with me, I'm in no contact and we have been broken up for just over 2 months, I'm hoping she will miss me as I'm getting better

Thank you so much Clay. This video spoke very well to my situation. I do have a few questions. In this type of situation, what would be the best forms of communication? Should I worry about contact her if she is seeing someone? Thanks again Clay.

Hahah my ex today I realised is a bih. Finally got closure she judged me on after the breakup and how I acted. I questioned her today on the phone & she said in the time we was together I was controlling I asked her why didn’t you ever tell me this in a relationship she couldn’t answer from there Reality hit and I realised she was never real in the relationship she told me the relationship was nothing I laughed and hung up

What if coach if I tried to apologize to my ex and he is lashing out more,name calling me and warned me never to msg him again.... Where is the chance to hv a positive interaction???what should I do now

I was still friends with my ex In our talking stage and she caught us hanging out. but she said it was cheating. Then I found out she slept with a friend and is with him now. I acted out and tried to fight him and went and told her Bd everything. She hates me she’s gone

Thank you very much 😊. Your the best.

Thank you so much 🤝

I know this Woman that I grew up with as friends and we ended up falling in love from A MMORPG and we ended on weird terms ....

My ex broke up with me and I have been forcing myself to make her change her mind but right now she hates me and she has blocked me everywhere. What should I do?

Clay, my ex hates me for no reason what so ever. We deleted and added each other off and on on social media during 129 days. He has a new girlfriend and I added him on Snapchat. He deleted me because he’s “Loyal” like he was when he was with me. Please help 😕

I wrote a letter of apology to my ex-wife which I read out to her, ended up with her getting super mad at me and moving in with her older brother these days (we still live together) before I read it out we could have fun together but now she's so mad at me?

She monkey branched on me. And yet SHE IS MAD on me for 10 month already according to here socials, even that i never contacted her since the discard. Such behavior is really wierd.

Thanks. I try to respect his wishes : not to talk to me in any way. But it is hurtful. I just want to leave the town so that we will never meet again. Maybe he will be happier.

My ex broke up with me three weeks ago because I was being too clingy and needy. He also had some feelings for somebody else. First, I reacted horribly by begging. This was wrong with me. I improved because I went no contact, though. He missed me, was worried, and even reached out to me. Then, my friend messed everything up by telling him I was purposely ignoring him. He felt lied to and had a slight hate for me because he felt hurt. That wasn’t the worst. Somebody told my ex that I was trying to make him break up with his new girlfriend. Now, my ex completely hates me. He regrets dating me. I want him back. We were a good couple. How can I get him to want me after making him hate me? Is there no hope? Did I mess everything up?

Oc course i think you know why she have to do that, we know that we going to do that

What if he doesn't take my calls, or doesn't meet me, doesn't even listen to me

Yes that's 10000% true

I'm A sweet heart.....

Even if I am nice to my ex, he’s always rude. I’ve never did any cheating or lying in relationship, we just had many arguments and stuff but then he started fading and he has moved on right now with a new girl (who was technically one of my closed friends) and they both hates me. This girl back fired on me and made my ex hate me more and he doesn’t trust me at all also they both blocked me I don’t really know what’s going on in his head. But I do know that there’s no chance of us getting back right?

What if I’m not trying to get him back but miss the co parenting with out the drama? My husband who iam separated from was just parenting with me fine sending money now he hates me won’t communicate without anger calling me names. I would hate for this to drag out badly and end up in court as it would affect my kids and me also I e known him since we were 13 and I just desperately want things to be amicable so we can parent without all his anger it’s so draining and very depressing I just miss us being able to communicate about the kids and being somewhat friends but he hates me now and every interaction is hate name calling profanity and it’s terrible and I’m confused on why

What if they threatened to call the cops, but haven’t done it, yet? I’m just curious.

What if your ex blocked you on everything?? Do you hold off till they unblock you?

What if they're being mean to move on?

What if I do interact positively yet my ex has always has seen me as a liar because he thinks I talked to multiple guys. Becaause i would make casual convo at my job or if someone reached out, ( if I only saw them as a friend) I’d answer or just me saying hello to someone of the opposite sex and not tell him about it. The fact id not say anything and explain what happened when he would see or hear something. Made him think I was hiding and wanted multiple men. So That’s the reason why he says he left me because I never saw interacting with any guy as bad( nor was it important to me, my ex was everything to me) so I didn’t say anything. And I didn’t know he needed me to let him know and he still thinks I’m the same because I speak or acknowledge being spoken To by a guy at times. Ima. Single mom, it’s his son. I’m not interested in dating or talking with anyone. And I’m not interested in anyone no matter if they try to make moves . So of course another situation like above happened (causing him to still think I’m the same. Or was the person he thought I was before/justified reason to why he broke up with me) just recently aka tonight one of his friends came into my work, but I didn’t even know until I was helping a customer at the checkout, when he was passing me to walk out the door of the grocery store and I was like “oh hi! “And the friend went backup hang with my ex ( in which he and I have been connecting well, and are becoming great friends nothing more) and had some to drink I’m guess since it’s NYE. And said something about it, which idc because it didn’t mean anything to me, and what happened was like if someone walks into the store you don’t know and you’re the greeter and you say hi. Well my ex was calling saying “ you’re a liar and you’re trying to play me. Mar you went out of your way to talk to Matt. And that’s the reason why I left you.” Aka thinking I want to talk to all the guys or speak to a single person. He wasn’t there Ik what happened. How do I show him that im telling the truth and show him I’m a new me when he still thinks about me because I speak to a guy, everytime usually it’s not me starting conversations. And we aren’t even together let alone my ex and I aren’t exclusively talking. But he gets mad because of that and doesn’t want to be with me because of that when he’s talking to multiple women and sleeping with themes which he can do he’s single and so am I. I don’t know what to do. How to show him. I’m telling the truth and this guy who’s his friend is saying stuff or my ex’s mind is messed up.

Its being 1 month n he didnt try at all n starts posting on fb about me when he has cheated unlimted times n hurted me and my one mistake he cant forgive n that is that i left him becuz he was hitting me know that i didn't take him bk he hates me

She just went silent after she broke up with me, no communication at all, I tired to reach out 2 weeks later ,but she kept her guard on. I'm on 80 days of NC she haven't reach out yet. Should I reach out out or just move on?

Hi Clay - it’s hard to know if you can see your ex do positive pullback ... all this while you think you were having some small positive connections - then after 5m he tells you he was just talking to you since he isn’t a ‘blunt’ person to tell you ‘it’s none of your business’ or that ‘I don’t feel like talking to you’. He’s now asked me directly for more no contact since he feels I don’t respect his boundaries. I only talk to him when he tells me something first and i find an opportunity to respond or try and create a friendly environment or I ‘mirror’ him. He feels he responds to me but it’s still making him angry inside because he still sees me talking to him as trying to win him back when I’m not acting all clingy and needy. I’m out of dcm mode now and it’s just me being my genuine friendly self. As you say there’s a reason for them breaking up with you and I do own that - I accept that he has no feelings for me due to my role and I all I’ve done is own up to making him feel disrespected or neglecting his needs. However it is two way and I know we as the dumped need to be doing more compared to the dumper. But he too never owned up his part especially since he did more lying and actual cheating and simply expected me to sweep it under the rug. It’s like he blames me because he knows that’s not him and he associates his misery and feeling bad about himself (for doing bad stuff) because of me. I think as a betrayed spouse I’ve acted and shown him more kindness than most who would throw their partners out or break up with them. Yet he even complains about me being ‘happy and having the odd conversation with him’. It is terrible - when you see how someone you loved and loved you back would treat you once so kindly treat you like you and time together meant nothing to them - that they can just chuck you out to the curb and be happy to move on wout you given your time and history. But I’m better at managing those thoughts and feelings when I do have a bad day. So now it will be hard for me to show / have more positive interactions with my ex when they don’t want to have any with you in the first place - he doesn’t consider me as ‘a friend’ and he always says how he has no ‘affection for me’ and will treat me with compassion and kindness due to me the mother of his kids but that’s it:(

Yes so much exaggeration!

She hates me cause I'm An honest loving caring compassionate guy.... She's cruel but I Love Her and know I can help change Her for the better ...! And I know I could if given the chance .... D:

If my ex still agrees to hangout with me do I still have a chance?

I was not nice to her she now dating someone else that is nice to here

Very empathetic :)

She just can't forgive me🙏

Dose he hate me if he unfollowed my friends in social media but is still following me

she hates me because i cheated i came clean and i told her everything she knows im a good person but i love her i want her back and she said shes never coming back and we do not talk what can i do @clay andrews

ugh just let it go. This woman making up hateful ideas of you is just not worth your time my guy. She did it once she'll do it again. Seriously think of what made her angry... Were you just being yourself? You deserve to always be yourself. with a woman thats not gonna oust you

Clay I gave my ex a Xmas gift after being basically no contact for 5 months.We saw each other a few times at work each time got slightly better but no real communication beyond that.We hugged and I left but he never reached out to say Thank u after opening it.I was very hurt the holidays came and went and not 1 text from him. So I saw him at work the day after Xmas and I acted mad w the silent treatment and just walked away from him.Should I apologize?He has a wall up w me that I just don't think I can get through.Thank you!!

What advice would you give if I'm going through this after an Echo breakup?

hi clay. u just described my ex exactly!! sometimes he tells me he knows i’ve changed and other times he says that he hates me and that i’ll never change. how can i have positive interactions with me when he’s being cold and harsh to the version he thinks i still am? i was recently blocked after a positive pullback. since there wasn’t any way to contact him i just went ahead with my own life. a couple days later he unblocked me but i didn’t reach out since i thought to give him more time and space. he texted me today saying “i unblocked u a few days ago if you’re still wondering if i’m lying.” he then deleted this text and called me but i missed it since my phone was on silent. i called back but he didn’t pick up. not sure how to proceed from now. please help!

So how do you get over your own anger from the way they have treated you? And what if you don’t see them to do this?

Me and my ex broke it off as a mutual agreement, even talked a little after we split. We stop talking for 3 years then suddenly out of nowhere I am getting mean and cruel txt, emails, phone msg etc. from him that he hates me etc. I'm perplexed and don't even know what the F! is going on? It took him 3 years to realize we split up ? lol! c-mon

I have a college class with my ex on Tuesday. She hates me and thinks I’m very needy. Should I go and talk to her in class? Last class we saw each other and walk by each other in the halls almost every day but ignored each other.

So my ex reached out and told me she may be ending it with her boyfriend. I don’t know if she’s open to dating me again but it seems unlikely. How should I approach this?

You r best 🥰. 4 years of my relationship end like nothing. He thought that I kissed someone and went date which is not true. But he hate me now and saying so mean to me. I beg him and waited for him few weeks and then I beg him again but he’s not listening to me at all and I did no contact 20 days and contact him but he said he got someone in his life and he’s in stage where he can’t go back now. And I heard that new gf they went date. But I’m still doing no contact now. It’s already been 6.5 month now. Is he really moved on ? 6.5 month is long enough and he love his new gf ? I don’t have any possible of getting back together?

It's 10000% crct

Hi Clay, when your ex is confused and asking himself which version of you is the real one (old or new) after a positive interaction, is it the same which happens in the crisis point?

Ok so I have an ex she’s 18 and we’ve been through a lot I helped her through something very personal and difficult for her in her past after two and a half years she broke up with me I could tell she was becoming distant with me maybe three months before the break I wanted to do no contact but I know that everyone that she thought cared about her just left her after a while and I’m not that kind of person so I kinda stay my distance I would only text her maybe every two weeks or so a couple weeks back I heard some stuff that she supposedly did not the kind to take hear say I went to talk to her to get her side she told me that’s not what happened and I asked how she was doing and she said alright and said she’s pushing people away but not me I’ve been super okay with the break I want her to be happy and do what she needs to do even if it’s not with me even know that kills me and I want to be with her but now she’s unfriended me on Facebook and now block me on Instagram we’re still friends on Snapchat but I just think that’s because I don’t really use it question is why would she push me away the one person that’s has always been there

My x and I work together and got another girl we both work together with. No problem I cried and said please don’t try to get me fired I will respect you no problem also I have tried to be nice to her nothing works!

I have a situation my ex block me on December 6, 2018 and I didn’t talk to her for three weeks that there a week I message her from dads cell. She responded saying this is something that I don’t want you to do anytime I thought OK.I text her three days later the message went through from dad cell She didn’t respond New Year’s past second day I Texter she was being negative so I didn’t let her take her to her house I told her how I feel and I can’t wait no more pretty much saying bye she on block me that night she told me that she doesn’t want me to Texar to respect her decision that she’s not ready at all to talk to me I said OK after three days I text her saying hi three times on the day she didn’t respond. I knew I shouldn’t Texter so I went on for a week she told me that we could start off as friends it got me happy. But I was too confident I remember I got off from work mad I Texter she wouldn’t really reply so I brought up the break up an stuff Before we started the conversation there was a little misunderstanding and I told her why don’t you block me again I was playing with fire pretty much I was stupid so when I brought up the break up I told her the same thing and she blocked me before she block me she’s like I’m a take your advice an she did. We see each other three times a week for church and Friday for potluck now it’s hard to see her without me what can I do in this stage????I talk to her last time and she told me that she wasn’t interested on the relationship but I could feel that she loves me now what do you think if I don’t show up for two weeks where that make it better just to give her time and give myself time to find myself and with a different approach with that help or is it all dead??? She block me the first time because I when Through her apps an called her out an also called her names bad words

why my ex has anger towards me ?

My ex blocked me and before that, he called me very mean names Edit: My ex broke up with me because he said he lost interest in me and wasn’t in love with me that much anymore

👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼

:/