Why INTJ Men Have No Friends

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INTJ men, also known as the "architect" personality type, are known for their intelligence, independence, and strategic thinking. While they seem to be good at a number of things, nobody is perfect and in the case of INTJ’s they often struggle with making friends. Today on Charisma, we’re going to be looking at 10 reasons why INTJ men have no friends.
Did you relate to this list? Or have anything to add? Let us know in the comments! Keep watching Charisma to continue learning more about this topic and many others :)
In the meantime here's all of the Myers Briggs Personality Types Explained
• Myers Briggs Personali...
And
Why INTJ's Are Always Single
• Why INTJ's Are Always ...
#charisma #psychology #intj #intjpersonalitytype #mbti

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4 окт 2024

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Комментарии : 138

@mindscopechannel Год назад

Did you relate to this list?

@Ingisen Год назад

@@acx10204 You can be strategic in many things, not just chess. Strategic as in being able to plan you life goals, managing close relations, helping others in various ways, etc. Don't let perceptions define you, certainly not 4 letters

@Ingisen Год назад

Yes and no. While I think MBTI is interesting to study, I treat it as just that: a study, a pastime, a distraction to help me unwind. Defining oneself by MBTI is - to me, at least - the same as using horoscopes and such. Using terminology such as Alpha, Beta, Sigma in regards to social hierarchy is in the same vein. My greatest relation to this video is the loneliness. Then again, it should be said that although loneliness is a state of mind, it is also a consequence. A consequence of others AND oneself. One of my regrets in life is not having realized this sooner. *Although I usually test as INTJ, I take that with a huge grain of salt. I certainly don't tick off the boxes so often applied to INTJs (although my gaze has the same effect as Moses and the ocean). **Being told while growing up that you appear intimidating is NOT good for the 'ol self-esteem

@Questionerz 7 месяцев назад

Your words are so true sometimes judging yourself through these "quizzes" sets up unrealistic expectations, but can also be insightful. -intj@@Ingisen

@Barbara_Banks_1 20 дней назад

I relate to this good deal. I’m an INTJ female. There’s two points, where I differ. I prefer small talk, about certain things like food, or the weather. Rather than people opening up far too quickly sharing details or problems in their lives. And as far as empathy goes, I’d rather squelch my empathy somewhat. Only because I highly value clear thinking over empathy. And strong emotions cloud objectivity. But yeah. You’re video describes both male and female INTJs. Thanks. ☺️

@Zumjay85803 10 месяцев назад

Friends interrupt thinking time.

@nieshuchang 3 месяца назад

As intj I don't agree, but I don't have many friends tho

@Zumjay85803 3 месяца назад

@@nieshuchang👌🏾

@markeberle3984 9 месяцев назад

"Friends" are just people that want to be heard or validated. Gain their knowledge, keep it moving. We have the world to gain.

@mirafields1641 5 месяцев назад

I acknowledge that your point is valid in certain friendships. But fact is...best way to grow as a human being is to have people that are actually able to contend with us and that will challenge us. And this vice versa. Any person that put value in personal growth will take this in perspective. And finding those special people that share that value and can be respectful about it....both parties will acquire huge benefits from the friendship. I do believe many intj's possess this value and thus choose their very few special people that can fill the role essential to their growth and missions and they provide the same in return.

@SamBrockmann 5 месяцев назад

This is not an attitude of the INTJ. Architects don't want to rule the world. You sound like a sociopath.

@galenspikesmusic 3 месяца назад

The world to gain? That’s why you have no friends.

@SamBrockmann 3 месяца назад

You're not a INTJ. You're a moron.

@letsreadtextbook1687 2 месяца назад

First sentence I can agree with, the rest sounds like sigma talk

@thepickles8833 Год назад

We have very long sighted perspectives that many people do not share. Opening up and sharing these views comes across as cold, dire, and frightening to most people. We see hard factual context in most topics, others evade these truths to stay in a comfortable state of wistful ignorance. We don’t like to tiptoe around these people, so we ultimately deem them “mentally fragile” and steer clear of them to reduce damage. Having someone who can content our foresights, spin it with a stable or optimistic recap... are the friends we crave the most... but they are Extremely rare to find.

@manigomez2387 Год назад

People drain my energy.

@cmymotion 8 месяцев назад

That's true

@nieshuchang 3 месяца назад

Not true don't say that

@tahasinameen3422 11 дней назад

Same

@BlackSailPass_GuitarCovers 4 часа назад

Then use strategies to recover your energy so you have enough to socialise.

@TheDexterFishbourne 9 месяцев назад

This rings true with me, I am 45 w/about 3 friends, everyone else is just an acquaintance.

@Chris-fn4df 7 месяцев назад

44 and with 3 friends. Each of whom I have known for over 20 years. We actually see each other once every week or every other week.

@malenesainz2136 Год назад

Same here, I’m female only have few that I consider friends those only that I know who can’t drain my energy.

@mindscopechannel Год назад

Makes sense. Seems that these carry over regardless of if you're a man or woman

@romonk5980 Год назад

Makes sense youre an average of the people you spend the most time with and INTJs REALLY dont want to be average, Jaja. I only have 3 close friends and were all INXJs. T/F

@Wasp239 Год назад

@@romonk5980 It's not about want. It's just is what it is

@andycuriel8367 Год назад

I have absolutely no friends. Partly because I feel I’m above everything else in terms of thinking (I think about 1000mph) and because I’m really antisocial lol I prefer to be alone

@Vaporrub8 Год назад

I feel that too. I've tended to ascribe to "modern hermit" at times when I start to doubt myself and weigh the options between it being worth trying to socialize or maintaining my own sense of sanity. But I usually realize that it appears to be an uphill battle either way, because I really only have family close to me, but even them I don't really have any sort of connection to because of drama so I just keep shut off and explore all kinds of ideas and possibilities. Honestly it seems more worth it to isolate more because it gives someone the chance to actually start thinking and not use the common fake persona and feelings that don't even lead anywhere besides venting mostly and using others as a backboard of sorts. I know now not to feel bad or ashamed about it as it just means I have preference of who i wish to share information or interests with without doing myself wrong with other people's BS

@romonk5980 Год назад

INTJ + ADHD everyone wants to be my friend until they are then they cant keep up and dont feel like trying or are too busy with their own path and drama so I back off.

@Wasp239 Год назад

you wanted to say Asocial. Asocial means not engaging with society. Antisocial means against society and refers to sociopaths and psychopaths.

@Wasp239 Год назад

@@Vaporrub8 "fake persona and feelings that don't even lead anywhere besides venting mostly and using others as a backboard of sorts" sounds like narcissism

@Vaporrub8 Год назад

@@Wasp239 you aren't completely wrong. The people i happen to be around at all or have any contact with is family, as I don't have any friends willingly. What I meant with my comment is that to me it feels like there is this persona that a lot of people give off that to me feels fake or basically that I'm waiting for them to get to the point. That I'm impatient with, or indifferent to other people being giddy and upbeat with me as an introvert (I guess this is the case of extrovert versus introvert interaction) when I just don't feel the same and my own feeling of being expected to behave the same otherwise I'm labeled rude or uninteresting or that something is wrong. Another reason that particular thing pops up into my mind is due to my mother actually showing a lot of signs of covert narcissism. She will continually put on a very false sense of elation, even after something happens (like for instance when she manages to say something hurtful to me, or make herself feel better about talking crap about anyone else) and when I don't express the exact thing she wants me to express, she will go into a "wow, okay. Guess everyone wants to be depressed today" sort of thing. Usually it's along the lines of "I can never be happy" (her way of trying to make me feel as though I'm dampening her mood or causing her sadness when I don't share the same feelings as her).

@1975KyleDavid Год назад

I've noticed that INTJ and INFJ people have many common traits--good and bad. Both groups are independent, unsocial, enjoy building in private environment... these are just a few of the many similarities. I don't know if I am an Intj or an infj, I fit in both groups.

@romonk5980 Год назад

That means youre an INXJ you just have weak feeling and thinking traits so youre in the middle instead of one sided like most INTor INF Js

@anime_lover12379 10 месяцев назад

You should look at cognitive function if your feeling is Fe ( infj) or Fi ( intj).

@jonrazo7912 Год назад

I am an INTJ and I have too many friends. My sister told me once that making friends was my superpower, I do it so easily. I wish I had more alone time than I do.

@pepthelad 11 месяцев назад

wish that was me 😂

@setlow4466 8 месяцев назад

just stop hanging out with them

@sashaalex8730 8 месяцев назад

You are not intj, maybe

@stevencrypto3721 8 месяцев назад

Same for me

@donfrank2544 7 месяцев назад

@@sashaalex8730 even if you’re an INTJ you may have really good charisma that overshadows your hard headedness. Kind of get too friendly with someone too fast and then start to feel awkward because your bran is rejecting it. Kind of strange.

@nonjaninja4904 9 месяцев назад

I'd say the worst thing as an INTJ, besides having to present something in front of a class, is being bored and feeling flat. I can deal with up or down, but not flat.

@SP-lk7do Год назад

I can keep entertain myself.. I can do sports, solving hard problems, learning new stuff and all the other things you have to do to live. Thats enough for me. I only just talk to people because everyone else is socializing.

@iandobbs4920 6 месяцев назад

Interesting that all videos about this subject suggest that INTJ’s ‘struggle’, ‘have a hard time’ or ‘find it difficult’ to make friends. As an INTJ myself, I disagree with all of this and would answer the question ‘Why do INTJ’s have no (I prefer the word few) friends?’ more simply and succinctly with, ‘because we don’t need them’.

@montezleamonte1445 Месяц назад

Perhaps you need to take a few other versions of the assessment and see the outcomes. I don’t entirely agree. I’ve done a few free and all are INTJ and I did the official one on Briggs company and still INTJ, as far as the free assessments I like the ones on 16personalties the most… So I know for 100% that this is my personality type… I don’t like it but accepted it at this point… becuase prior to discovering who I really am… my whole life I thought I was this free spirit artist, forced myself to be someone I wasn’t and fell flat on my face and failed over and over wondering why, why can’t I fit in why can’t I be this version of myself, WHY do I keep failing. Why am I neglected and rejected constantly by this world and lifestyle. It’s becuase I was a logical analytical individual who would point out the facts over emotion and well… in the art world, it just doesn’t fit… and at first I told myself screw it I don’t need any friends I don’t need anyone if they don’t want to believe fact over feelings then fine.. don’t care don’t need them… but no, we do care. You’re lying to yourself if you say you don’t need friends, or anyone. Maybe What you said was just a defense mechanism from the truth… becuase personally here’s the truth from fellow INTJ who’s been in denial… I consistently wonder and brainstorm if there’s any possible way to change or curb some of the more negative aspects to our personality type…and 9 times out of 10 I decide the answer is no, so just embrace it…. But then there’s that small whisper in my ear… faintly telling me that all of this could be and probably is… just an overly analytical way of admitting that yes… yes I do wish I had friends… even just one…. but at age 34 it just doesn’t seem likely anymore.

@iandobbs4920 Месяц назад

@@montezleamonte1445 That too is interesting. Like you, I have done many tests over the years and all come back with INTJ as the result, (including those done by my employers). I’m not sure that I explained myself very well before. I do have friends, very few but very good friends, (one from when I was at infant school), a wife and two fantastic children, I am therefore very happy with my lot. Do I need, (or want), more? Not really. It may seem weird and unnatural to non-INTJs but I stopped worrying about it a long, long time ago, (if indeed I ever really did). 34 is very young to just accept or assume that it’s too late to make friends, it’s not like INTJs can’t make them, if they really want to, it’s just more of an effort. But one thing is for sure, we know when a friend is real and worth the effort plus, we can just jettison those who are not worth it, with ease. The best of luck to you. 👍

@iandobbs4920 Месяц назад

⁠That too is interesting. Like you, I have done many tests over the years and all come back with INTJ as the result, (including those done by my employers). I’m not sure that I explained myself very well before. I do have friends, very few but very good friends, (one from when I was at infant school), a wife and two fantastic children, I am therefore very happy with my lot. Do I need, (or want), more? Not really. It may seem weird and unnatural to non-INTJs but I stopped worrying about it a long, long time ago, (if indeed I ever really did). 34 is very young to just accept or assume that it’s too late to make friends, it’s not like INTJs can’t make them, if they really want to, it’s just more of an effort. But one thing is for sure, we know when a friend is real and worth the effort plus, we can just jettison those who are not worth it, with ease. The best of luck to you. 👍

@rubelrana-vr7gl Год назад

I am intj. Very happy to know why I have less friend.

@mindscopechannel Год назад

Figured it was worth making a video about it!

@Buzzard095 Год назад

Why say that here? You are a liar.

@BlackSailPass_GuitarCovers 4 часа назад

The few times I have opened up to people outside of my immediate family they have used it as gossip material or ammunition. Makes it pretty unappealing to keep sharing my inner thoughts and feelings with others if there's a high chance of it being used against me.

@RetroXRicardo Год назад

An interesting take on this INTJ type! Thanks for sharing. Randomly discovered your channel through the RU-vid algorithm! 🤟🤟🤟

@canadianlumberjack7642 8 месяцев назад

Intj male, doing life my way... zero friends for years. Bushido outlook.

@allabtsid 5 месяцев назад

As an INTJ myself I don't even let my feelings/vulnerabilities known to family members or closest friends.

@llezmollah217 Месяц назад

Best thing to do. They'll just use them against you

@Ovale-tt 20 дней назад

That's a very sad comment. Without vulnerability, true intimacy and love are nearly impossible. When you let a few people come close to you and know you genuinely, you feel maybe more insecure at first, but your life is much more meaningful, colourful and intense. :) Wish you a nice day. ENFP

@jailjones1 12 дней назад

@@Ovale-tt how does being vulnerable make life more meaningful, colorful, and intense?

@Ovale-tt 12 дней назад

@@jailjones1 I would say we love others for who they are, not for who they pretend to be. When we are vulnerable, we show our true emotions, thoughts, weaknesses, and in that sense we can be more easily hurt than when we try to appear indifferent, detached, secure, etc. But sharing with others our true selves makes relationships more authentic. With people who do appreciate us for real and who don't try to take advantage of our vulnerability, we can feel fulfilled, secure and grateful. Then life becomes more authentic and colourful because the more vulnerable we are with someone we love, the more the person is going to share their true self back. Friendships and relationships get deeper, more meaningful, interesting and inspiring. More chances to find friends and partners who can really match our real personality, interests and needs. Who know how to be strong when we are weak and vice versa. My partner is an INTJ. Everytime he's vulnerable with me, I feel more connected and close to him. It feels like a treasure to have the privilege of him opening his heart, trusting me, having the courage to expose who he is. What do you think ? :)

@ambvurt3739 Год назад

My closest friends and I all took the MBTI assessment at the same time and my entire friend group, all five of us, turned out to be INTJ lol.

@mindscopechannel Год назад

Thats wild haha

@ambvurt3739 Год назад

@@mindscopechannel I guess what was said about preferring to be friends with those that value independence and intellection was correct.

@Buzzard095 Год назад

The lol negates your untrue statement.

@Peter-uo9km Год назад

Must be like a party up in there

@romonk5980 Год назад

Makes sense youre an average of the people you spend the most time with I only have 3 close friends and were all INTj

@LaMach420 10 месяцев назад

I cant argue the most fun Ive ever had was with the boys, that said we were only friends cause we shared the same common interest and sense of humor. However once they got bored of said activity, the thread went missing and our friendship fell by the wayside. I get a lot done when Im alone and while I dont feel as lonely as others may in solitude, it still sucks sometimes. Im able to vibe with all types minus SFJs 😴 we just need to be doing an activity together. The types I can smoke a doob/crack a beer with and just talk are usually xNTP, INFJ and some xNFPs. Sure I could find some, just need to put effort into socializing.

@louie4939 4 месяца назад

So basically i am the only INTJ man who has loyal friends 😆💖 Basically they're all loyal and reliable, they're my treasure and I will never abandon them. 💖✌️ My 1st group is where I am in college, They were most extroverted and only 3 of us are introverts. 11 loyal and fun people, we did many mess up things hahaha, but we like to hang up after school and drink more coffee.. We Cherish every moment even though we are all graduated and have our own personal responsibility we are constantly met because we really treasure our relationship that we built up in college. We graduated in 2018. The word I will never forget is that 1 of my friends said to me she say, "If I will abandon them she will never give up our friendship." Those word earned my respect because she done it in her actions. 2nd group we're in my colleagues in the church, they're all amazing and great leaders, we're our treatment to each we're like siblings. I cannot tell them all.. I had friends in work, my students.. etc.. Being INTJ doesn't mean you cannot make friends, you just need to be true to your self so that people around you will accept who you are. 💖✌️

@michaelbuick6995 3 месяца назад

I don't think ANYONE has friends. A fairweather friend isn't a friend, and all friends are fairweather. The difference between us INTJs and everyone else? We're not fooled. It's essentially our defining characteristic we see the code in the matrix.

@markwatson7652 6 месяцев назад

This is spot on about me. I'd really like to see a similar matrix about the OCEAN personality model.

@MissLibertarian 8 месяцев назад

This INTJ female has two INTJ male relatives who are great at empathy and expressing emotions and support but they often follow the golden rule and do unto others as they would have done unto them. … So, if another person is trying not to cry, they might do something to distract their thoughts to either a solution or a different topic to help them not cry. The empathy they feel will often be unspoken in words but seen in their face or manner. They may go away and think about it and come back later with some kind of contribution of support and it might be their best idea. In short, this and one or two of the other statements about INTJ men was less convincing to me than the ones that I can agree with. When I see so much suffering in the world I want to go and fix the broken monetary system and open up healthcare to the free market in order to save lives from stress and malpractice. Is that empathy? I also do things to further those goals. The way others express empathy often seems like small talk. When people talk about their shoe-shopping expeditions, I pull out my story of the anthropodiatrist in the UK who helped anthropologists distinguish Anglo-Saxon and Celt remains by the shape of their feet (an article I read last century). You are correct about small talk, but my Dad could talk to anyone (starting with me as a child) asking questions to discover my thought processes in a Socratic manner which is a sign of respect. The stock footage that illustrates this video is really distracting and I had to close my eyes as the expressions displayed were off-topic and seemed to have been more representative of actors and models than INTJs. Several of the Jane Austin movie capture INTJs better. I’m curious to know if there is a body type associated with this type of brain.

@evolutionkakumei 27 дней назад

INTJ. I have a few long time friends but stopped adding friends decades ago.

@timg6176 4 месяца назад

We dont want friends, big difference from not being able to make them.

@nekotoru 2 месяца назад

I had friends when I was a kid but in my 15 I understood that it's better to be alone. My friends started drinking alcohol, make small crimes so our paths splitted. Then I got some friends on the Internet (more people - more chance to meet someone similar). But now I have no friends at all. And I don't feel I even need to find some

@michaelhenault4381 2 месяца назад

Easy to make friends. Making deeper friendships make up for the superficial relationships. Quality over quality is more valuable and frankly more efficient, more rewarding.

@marjan_t 2 месяца назад

INTJ man with no friends, let's be friends 🤗

@nikitaacoral 7 месяцев назад

I’m an ENFP and I feel the exact way. I think at 1000mph and find everything predictable and easy and boring. In saying that though I find beauty in this. I still prefer to be around INTJs though because they think the same as me, I just wish they could look past the sunshine exterior

@dennisfabian2570 7 месяцев назад

Sunshine exterior? Like into the depths of what people pretend to be, because we don’t like socializing with them too much?

@lesterjones237 2 месяца назад

The best friends I’ve had are enfp because they can actually read me, and have a sense of play.

@train_xc 19 дней назад

I actually have two very close friends. One is INTJ and the other is INTP

@user-8b5en6bgh7f 10 месяцев назад

An intj women also have no friends

@santinamarie4699 4 месяца назад

They are skeptical about introverted thinking. Their extroverted thinking makes them think that the only thing that exists is what they can see and touch

@xpozen8994 Год назад

Who needs friends?

@romonk5980 Год назад

Wanna be INTJ business buddies?

@xpozen8994 Год назад

@@romonk5980 In what sense

@pf8264 Год назад

@@romonk5980I'm dowm

@tahasinameen3422 Год назад

Solitude is our best friend.

@jesssss12 11 месяцев назад

😂 fr, like for what?

@Benjamin-mx1vf Год назад

INTJ-A.... I have friends

@Buzzard095 Год назад

You are not

@albertmichelson1615 Год назад

I’m an INTJA and I still don’t have friends

@theoalara 4 дня назад

Where can I find an intj 😭 they sound like my dream person lol as I’m very independent and don’t have any friends lol

@theoalara 4 дня назад

I’m not sure what my mbti is because I get multiples answers each time lmao

@deshaebeasley 2 месяца назад

I just missed out on a good one yesterday 😕

@Thomasnorrebro 2 месяца назад

From 8 and onwards: “They may have a tough time understanding their own emotions and the emotions of others...” -introverts spend A LOT of time/energy on understanding themselves and since emotions are always deeply personally rooted.. Understanding someone’s emotions may require that you know that person better than the person him/her-self.. -maybe the INTJ understands this and just dont bother

@Epifairos Месяц назад

No friends for us. Only honored opponents :D. Nah, bullshit. But it's quite specific. I had one friend during the primary school and it was because of similar interests. When others became friendly, it was usually because they needed something from me. Sometimes I helped them when were one of the closer ones. When I discovered LARP, I finally found my type of people. Intelligent, creative, interesting, same interests, mostly introverted. I'm still very independent and I don't participate in everything that any of the groups I'm involved in does but that's the way it goes.

@eena_na_ve Год назад

Intj women too:)

@mindscopechannel Год назад

True!

@setlow4466 8 месяцев назад

apart from explaining the same concept with different words over and over good vid

@jnying Месяц назад

Just wondering y specify men im an intj woman n dont hav much frds

@btcpac-pr7bu 2 дня назад

not many friends they want * alot who we grew apart from

@jhawksmoore9773 6 месяцев назад

Due to my hobbies i've made a reasonnable amount of valuable friends but they're all from the rationnal types.

@YTS214 10 месяцев назад

I dont know which mbti i have

@cmymotion 8 месяцев назад

That's not true. I have friends, though i like to be alone most of the times. It is not that we are not empathetic, empathy does not solve any issues most of the time.